Spock: Yum, Thanks

Spock: Yum, thanks

Giorgio, trying to duct tape his mouth: What the fuck stop eating it

Micheal: *pitches an idea*

Pike, impressed: Huh, there might be something here!

Saru, under his breath: Yeah, a lawsuit.

Paul: Yeah, I've probably hit rock bottom.

Paul: But my husband is here so it's fine :)

Detmer: You've all heard of elf on the shelf, now get ready for-

Detmer: *placing a pot on Pauls's head* A thot in a pot

Paul:

Paul: *getting up from his seat* Get ready for a bitch in a ditch because that's where you're gonna find your body, you little fu-

Georgiou: I failed my safety training course today.

Pike: Why, what happened?

Georgiou: Well one of the questions was "In case of a fire, what steps would you take?"

Pike: And?

Georgiou: Well apparently "FUCKING LARGE ONES" isn't an acceptable answer.

Tilly: Five little monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and…

Micheal, as she walks past: Was diagnosed with mesothelioma.

Tilly: ...Mamma called the doctor and the doctor said…

Paul, not looking up: You might be entitled to financial compensation if he or a loved one dies.