Ghost Of You

ghost of you

a lingering touch on my arm

a quick hug against your side.

gently, you interlace your fingers with mine

just as gently, you press a kiss to my temple.

your thumbs catch the tears on my cheek

and your arms hold me tight against your chest.

your sweet words bring a smile to my face

and your low voice brings an ache to my stomach.

i miss you

deeply, terribly, painfully.

i miss you, yet i don't even know you.

maybe one day i'll meet you

or someone like you,

and i can finally tell them the words

i so desperately wish to say to you.

So well written :')

I never knew rock bottom had so many levels, and though today I’m half empty, the other half is love. I don’t know how to swallow all the words I never said, how to keep your name from dragging old loves back into my vocabulary. I never wanted to fix you. I just wanted to hold you until you didn’t care if you thought you were whole or broken anymore. How many nightmares have I woken up from looking at my hands to see if the blood stains are still there? sometimes you have to close a door. Not to keep the bad things out, but to keep the bad things in.

I loved you when there was nothing left to love except these shadows.

via weheartit

Mary Oliver, ‘north country’

i'm starting to run out of fingers

to count the amount of times

you've made my heart flutter in its cage.

a gentle brush of shoulders

or an insult mixed in with smiles

when you grab my arm

to stop me from doing something stupid

or you shake my hand

and hold it for a second too long.

the sound of my name from your lips

carries with it more weight

than the two syllables ever held

and i can't help but want to know you

to travel the paths that led you here

to read the map which points

towards the mountains you've climbed

and the rivers you've swam across.

i want to know what you've left behind

and the secrets you're hiding

i want to know

if you prefer moonlight

to bright yellow sunshine.

dogs or cats? pink or blue?

an endless list of questions

i want more

and more

like a book whose pages are yet to be filled

and i'll wait for you to write down your stories

until we run out of paper and ink

how could you be empty and still carry the whole universe inside of you? you beat inside my ribcage like the soft throb of waves on the seashore, yet every day is a prayer to a summer of shadows we still sing under. everyone leaves an echo - darling, you’re the warmth my heart needed to survive. the more I love you, the more alive I feel. don't want you to become a chapter in my life, I want us to write this book together.

This is my favorite time in history because you’re alive right now.