Don't Be Afraid To Use The Lesbian Tag. Don't Be Afraid To Use The Wlw Tag. Don't Let The Exclusionists

Don't be afraid to use the lesbian tag. Don't be afraid to use the wlw tag. Don't let the exclusionists scare you away from tags you're allowed to use! Besides, I myself still had an exclus find my shit even though I went out of my way to avoid tags I fear are swarming with exclusionists (without taking into the account that these fucking losers most definitely browse the mspec les/gay tags with the intent of badgering some random small inclusionist blog). I'm not doing that anymore. I have just as much of a right to use the ‘lesbian’ tag as a monosexual lesbian does, and you do, too. Sometimes you just have to say ‘fuck you’ to the people who want you to not exist, as well as those who swear up and down that you don't exist, and that you're harming the community. You've got to claim your rightful spot in the community… that's the best you can do at the end of the day.

people love it when lesbians are some guy until those lesbians are actually some guy.

people love lesbian masculinity, lesbians who use he/him and lesbians who are just some guy, and lesbians who call themselves boys and men and guys and dudes, and lesbians who are indistinguishable from men until they come too close to actually being men.

people love it when you blur the lines between gender, but they don't want you to blur it too much, otherwise you're not a real lesbian and you're invading lesbian spaces. if you blur the lines too much, flirt with the concept of being a man too much then you might as well be committing a hate crime because you explored gender in the wrong direction.

accepting that gender is a spectrum includes acknowledging that yeah, that spectrum includes lesbian gender, and yes, sometimes lesbian gender overlaps with being an actual honest to god guy. this is not something that will change, so i recommend making peace with it.

A lot of trans spaces hate masculinity soo bad it’s unreal. I knew an AMAB nonbinary person who, to those who had never done the gender rodeo before, looked strikingly like a cis man. They were big, broad, with a thick scruffy beard. They dressed masculinely. It was clear by talking to them for even a second that their masculinity was incredibly queer, but to most people they wouldn’t read that way, even with pronoun pins displayed proudly on their chest.

They described themself as “soft masc” and their gender felt very similar to me to so many butches I had met. They toyed with the label themself. Their attraction to women fell under a pretty sapphic umbrella and in plenty of cases were welcomed by queer women, trans and cis alike.

But often they felt more comfortable in transmasc spaces because, as was apparently a cardinal sin in many transfemme spaces, they liked their masculinity.

They got accused of faking being trans. They were implied to be stealing space from trans women. And then accused by wlws of being a predatory cis man invading space to get to women. They constantly had to walk a narrow path to not be seen as something sinister because they weren’t feminine.

Because masculine is seen as equivalent to “man” and “man” is bad. It’s predatory and violent only ever and always.

And over and over and over and over again anti-masculinity folks claim that this stance protects women and transfemmes. But you are never ever ever going to be normal about “women and nonbinary folx” if you hate masculinity so bad! You will never be normal about butches. You will never be normal about transmascs. And you will never be normal about ANYONE who is AMAB. Even the feminine ones.

A trans woman who is a masc lesbian is going to be a predator to you. A trans woman who doesn’t pass well enough for you is going to be a predator to you. A trans woman who LIKES her masculinity or masculine features is always gonna be a faker trying to evilly sneak into your sacred spaces.

Cis women for sure push this shitty narrative, as do trans men and transmascs who think they’re falling on their sword for Women™️ to atone for the sin of being masculine or worse, men; but oof so do trans women and transfemmes who think policing binary gender conformity will protect them.

Hi, we're endogenic and (obviously/lh) support endo systems. Do note that there's a fuckton of discourse on this blog, so please be careful if you're not into that but still wish to follow.

Also in regards to getting anti endo blogs on your dash, the block button does wonders! Unfortunately, it doesn't prevent EVERY anti endo post from ending up on your dash, but it definitely helps a lot. :)

-Mephiles

Oof we really need more pro-endo and endo/nontraumagenic system blogs to follow and interact with because tumblr has a nasty habit of filling our “for you” dashboard with anti-endos for some reason and it’s super annoying. So if you’re pro-endo, a nontraumagenic system, etc. then please follow us and we’ll follow you back (the follow will come from our main blog infantalloy though)

Note: being neutral is not what we’re looking for

gender and sexuality is a fickle thing. sometimes two gay cisgender men will be dating for decades and one of them will turn out to be a transgender woman. a lot of times that won't work out but sometimes it will. her partner may still choose to identify as gay. She might even identify as gay, and they continue to be happily in love. Queer politics isn't going to get any better if you don't accept that situations like that happen every day.

Idk a lot of the backlash to broadening who falls under what terms comes from the need to distinctly fall under the specific label you worked towards…but distance from adjacent labels only limits your allies and puts you in a rigid box you can’t come back out of either.

Saw a post by a trans woman horrified by the concept of having overlapping experience with femboys because “fuck you I am a woman.” You are. A woman with a lot of overlapping experience with a GNC man. You’re not a GNC man. He’s not a woman. And the gap between you two is not a chasm.

“How dare you say trans men are similar to butch lesbians. Trans men are men.” Yeah, men with similar experiences to butch lesbians. The butch lesbian isn’t a man. You aren’t a woman. And the gap between you is not a chasm.

This mindset doesn’t even account for GNC men who also ID as women, trans men who use the label of lesbian. Butch can be a label for a person of either AGAB.

Binary trans people wanna separate themselves from each other and from nonbinary people sooo bad. Now it makes eggs feel like the jump from GNC woman to man is an insurmountable journey. A femboy gets told he’s making a mockery of trans women’s experiences. A transmasc femboy is seen as just a faker. A butch trans lesbian is seen as a faker.

These labels are all just plots on the map, not one side or the other. You journey to the farthest edges and you find twinks and lesbians who look and act identical despite being supposed opposites. It’s all made up, we’re all queer.