Interviewer: Where Do You See Yourself In 10 Years

interviewer: where do you see yourself in 10 years

me: hmm, great question, the year is 1922; I'm on an archaeology dig wearing a loose cotton shirt, my hair in victory rolls & a leather bound notebook strapped to my leg, someone yells "hey, we got something down here!" and—

interviewer: ma'am —

me: oh man you're right victory rolls weren't a thing until the 1940s that's embarrassing, so anyways as I was saying

listen if you think someone is cool and you dig their energy you just have to tell them, because that’s the kind of stuff you remember a thousand times longer than somebody complimenting your hair or whatever. tonight I told a girl from my theory class that I like her analytical approach and she bounced back at me saying she digs my feminine energy and how she gets the vibe that, to my core, I exist to uplift women and I damn near cried. tell people what resonates about them. be real. help each other feel seen.

Wait for it…

Hogwarts Houses Aesthetics

Gryffindor- holding rocks from the beach in yours hands, watching them flow out, being at the playground at midnight with your best friends, completing dares that no one even dared you to do, running just for the purpose of doing something, sending your best friend appreciation paragraphs for them at 3:00 A.M., going on roller coasters very confident but freaking out a little when you get to the top, playing ghosts in the graveyard with you or friends at 11:00 A.M., putting on makeup and dressing up even though you have nowhere to go, dancing and lip syncing in your room crazily, finding wonders in the little things, spacing out, diving in right away in the lake, handing out feminism badges, walking at a regular pace in the rain with your arms out, forming new clubs, being overly-excited, making small designs on the misty car window, either taking 0 selfies or 1938284 at a time, red lipstick and black mascara, scraped up legs

Hufflepuff- sugar highs, putting so much trust in your friends, dressing up as your favorite book and tv show characters, growing out your hair, blueberry pancakes when you wake up, whether that’s at 6:00 A.M. or 12:00 P.M., catching fireflies, the feeling you get when you make all your friends fall over laughing, seeing a spiny chair and immediately know what you will be doing for the rest of the day, ice cream bigger than your head, putting flowers in your friend’s hair, being the last to finish your popsicle, getting excited when you hear the ice cream truck, heart-shaped sunglasses, petting every puppy you see on the street, making a big deal out of everything, getting your friends presents even though there is no special occasion, candy shops, slumber parties, writing songs, writing stories, musicals and Broadway plays, caring about others more than you care about yourself, strip malls, taking pictures of your friends, happy drunk, defending the underdog, finding beauty in everyone’s eyes

Ravenclaw- record shops, when your face gets red after you get complimented, chokers, laughing when your nervous, cuddling with your friends at 2:00 A.M., drinking coffee in the morning, going to the beach when the waves are crazy, telling yourself to only read one more chapter but you end up finishing the book, writing letters to the author, scented candles, knee high socks, taking videos so you can remember the moment, perfect makeup techniques, laying on the rooftop at 3:00 A.M., looking at the stars, making multiple playlists for different moods, watching documentaries, playing mindlessly with your friend’s hair, eating a three course meal at 12:00 A.M., pranking your friends when they’re sleeping, putting your headphones on long car rides, binge watching Netflix, spending your day at the library, asking your friend to go to the bathroom with you, getting a churro at the fair, studying because you want to, not because anyone else wants you to

Slytherin- testing the limits, fire whiskey, mysteries, the sound of the thunderstorm against your window while you are drifting to sleep, doing anything for your friends, talking back to the teacher, smirking against the classroom, splashing the people who think the water is too cold in the lake, escaping reality, black roses, rooting for the underdog, downtown, skyscrapers, doing anything to get your way, cat ears headband, correcting people’s grammar, solving moral dilemmas easily, fixing your best friend’s makeup in the school bathroom, leather jackets, playful smirks, making faces across the classroom, knowing what your friend is saying just by reading their expression, self-deprecating humor, the moon, looks that could kill, playing sweet and sour with your close friends, doing everything yourself, with no help, rewriting history, chopping a little bit or a lot of your hair off, dirty jokes, sleepless nights, being the hero to your class because you found all the answers online, knowing when to stop but not stopping anyway

I’ll never forget the most valuable piece of advice I was given, “if you feel like you can’t make it through the day, only focus on the next hour. If you feel like you can’t make it through the next hour, only focus on the next few minutes. If you feel like you can’t make it through the next few minutes, take it one breath at a time.” I have to remind myself that, you’re gonna be okay, try to see through the cloud of doubt that is harboring all of the negative energy. It’s gonna get better. You are not alone. You are loved. So many people care about you, and want to see you happy and smiley. It’s okay to feel like this. Your feelings are valid. It’s okay to feel nothing at all. You’re not going to feel like this forever.