I Really Want To Know What I Did That Was So Bad That I Was Cursed In This Lifetime. Seriously....I Mean

I really want to know what I did that was so bad that I was cursed in this lifetime. Seriously....I mean my overall day to day life isn't to bad, but what I'm referring to is PEOPLE. If I lived on a remote island with 3-5 other individuals who have empathy like myself and the rest of the island was just animals and crops my overall life would be good I believe. But here in the states being surrounded by thousands of mindless zombiefied drones with no mind of their own, who look to one another and play follow the fucking leader, people with no unique individuality or creative thinking on their own, I've noticed that people can't leave their homes without the new hip trendy accessory known as self absorbed evilness. I'm being serious here. Everyone I've met from the age of 18 to present day have been so fucking evil towards me. So manipulative and abusive. From my own family members to people I've met in the streets, clubs, grocery stores, etc etc. And I've tried the whole "treat others as you want to be treated" crap and that doesn't work. Because that's all I've done and you wanna know what I've gotten back? Mind numbing mind fucking manipulative narcissists! Thats all I've experienced. I've shelled out well over hundreds of thousands of dollars to just 1 PERSON alone. And I got back NOTHING. Regardless of how patient I was. I kept telling myself to "be patient", and "you don't know what he's really thinking about you so don't assume anything and just chill" (only because of the things he would say that would imply he was actually interested) only to finally come to the realization after 9 long years it was all a manipulation tactic to keep me complacent. When I explained everything and I asked for a simple apology. He said I wasn't getting one. So that lame ass wack ass advice about treat others how you want to be treated is straight bullshit and useless when 90% of the population is evil selfish spit fucks. The other thing is I'm single but I don't want to be deep down inside. I stay to myself because of my past experiences and not wanting to go through the bull crap anymore. BUT deep down I know good and well I yearn for companionship, and a long term relationship with a great man who fears the most high God, who can watch horror movies with me, who can play video games with me, and who loves to try new foods/cuisine. A great dude who likes to be outdoors with me whenever I actually want to leave the house. That's all I ever frickin ask for. And you mean to tell me I can't even get that? You mean to tell me everyone here is a self absorbed asshole? Everyone here has the same damn mindset of "oh I'm sorry B but I'm STILL not emotionally available, or mentally ready for a relationship or to start a family"??? Do I have that right? And the good ones of course are either already taken OR so damaged by past ex's like myself that they literally turn into a hermit crab and don't want to have anything to do with a relationship. I put this on my fathers grave! I may not be as flashy and standout-ish and bold, and attention seeking as I was back in my 20s, BUT I still low-key will periodically speak to a man when he is speaking to me. I don't act like a bitch and turn him away right off rip. Depending on the vibe I will and have gone as far as to exchange the digits. Whereas the so called men who are so traumatized by 1 or 2 experiences COMPLETELY shut the hell down. Its so pathetic 🙄 😑 but my overall luck with people has been so awful I feel like ill NEVER find a decent human being to connect with BEFORE the most high God returns for us. Hell the real-estate market has crashed already, and once everything falls in line like dominoes and crashes too just like prophecy states thats when all hell will break loose. So frankly we don't have much time left here on "earth realm". And the only types of people that have shown me any level of attention and talks to me about long term relationship is the wrong types. Thats why I feel like I'm cursed with people.

MESSAGE!

when women act like the mother in romantic relationships

the truth is women have some accountability when it comes to them not getting what they want from men

i’ve been so attentive to it lately, but sooo many women are treating men like delicate flowers and mothering them

here’s a few examples just from this month

i’m at starbucks and this woman walks in with her husband, she has a backpack on one shoulder, she’s carrying her small baby on the other shoulder, and using her right hand to push the baby’s stroller, you can tell she’s struggling, meanwhile her husband next to her is literally carrying nothing, doing nothing to help her, being generally useless, and this woman has the audacity to tell this grown man, “go sit and i’ll order for us”, not only does he obey he doesn’t care to even take off the load of the backpack, baby or the stroller !

talk about treating your husband like a child

another example i notice all the time since the city i live in is super touristic is this, almost always, in couples, of all ages young and old, i always see the women asking for directions, asking the bus driver where the destination of the bus is, asking for help translating stuff, these men sit behind letting mommy do all the work, and i literally have to compose myself because why is the woman doing all the work while the man is sitting behind like a spoiled princess waiting for his girlfriend to bring back the correct information on where to go

there are endless examples but the truth is, a lot of you don’t know how to separate romantic love from your mother instinct

as soon as you get involved with a man, you want to do everything for him, make his life easier, protect him from basic everyday responsabilites, and you think that’s showing love when that’s literally just what a mother would do with her child

stop taking the lead with everything, stop calling for the waiter, or asking to be moved to a better table, let the man handle it

stop trying to plan the itinerary, and pack the luggage, and make checklists to make sure you forgot nothing, let the man handle it “oh but i can’t trust my boyfriend to plan a trip because bla bla bla”, he will never learn if you don’t let him and 99% of the time he’s just faking being bad at things so you do them instead

stop telling men to go sit while you go order the thing, or browse the store or demand to speak to the manager, let HIM handle it

stop trying to prevent men from making mistakes and protecting them from their own stupidity and lack of initiative, let him get sick for eating the expired food, he’s a grown man he should know better to read a food label, let him get constipated because he doesn’t know how to balance his diet, let his favorite white shirt get red in the wash, he should learn about separating colors

men learn through action, and consequences, not when you continuously protect them from life

generally, just stop trying to baby-proof life for your man, that’s how he grows to resent you and simultaneously rely on you for everyday things, you get stuck with the role of the care taker and wonder where it all went wrong !

Seriously.😔

“Do you know what hurts most about a broken heart? Not being able to remember how you felt before.”

— Cassie Ainsworth

can you please post more selfies

Aaawwww sure not a problem. I wanted to do so but keep forgetting to in my free time. 😁😊😇🥰