Sad Thoughts - Tumblr Posts
she was written by deftones albums
Omggg I love this movie so muchhhh
I'm too overwhelmed of everything
I hate myself so much! I just realized I have let myself go so far from what I want to be! I have to stop eating ice cream, chocolate and junk food and only eat fruits for snacks now.. I hate feeling like this.. I want to be thin so bad.. I have to stop caring about my feelings and just do this or else I'm going to find myself so fat in future... bc of work and life I always compensate it by comforting myself with food but I just realized nothing really matters so I don't care If I feel sad or anxious and don't get the food I want... I have to get comfortable with my bad thoughts so I don't eat so fucking much!!!!
I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to I need to lose weight or else I'm going fucking insane okay!!!!
Also my birthday is in a month and I don't want to feel like shit when I have my birthday!!
I’m living and just waiting for something to happen guess that’s what I did all the time and will
"why did you cry when i told you i loved you?"
because i knew eventually one day you'd stop
i wish I didn't have to sexualize myself to feel wanted
A ghost appeared above me.
It was the ghost of a girl.
About my age.
She looked strangely familiar.
That's when I realized.
It was me.
"I'm glad you were strong, love." She said floating above me with a smile of great relief.
I look at her shaking my head in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"I was doing so well."
"Really I was."
"I was getting better."
"Please, I can still be strong."
I feel tears streaking down my face.
"Please. Please. Please. Please."
I beg with the ghost of myself.
She shakes her head.
"You don't have to hold on anymore, love." She tells me, pushing my hair behind my ear.
"You were the strongest you could've been." she says.
"I have to go now. But I am so proud of you." She silently disappeared.
I never saw her again.
IM NOT SICK ENOUGH
IM NOT BAD ENOUGH
I NEED TO GET WORSE
I NEED TO BE MORE SICK
Maybe if I was prettier
Or skinnier
Or smarter
Or quieter
If I was enough for him
Maybe he'd love me again
Or maybe he would love me
Did he ever?
His actions make me doubt his words
But still I desperately wish to be enough
how is it their last season together???😭
Sometimes I long to go home even when I'm sitting in my living room surrounded by family.