Daffodils

daffodils

paring: the boyz changmin x female reader (kang yeseul) genre: angst, unrequited love, soulmate, hanahaki disease, drabbles warnings: mention of vomiting but not detailed word count: 455 words

Why did it hurt so much? Why is there an unbearable, aching pain in my heart as I watch you talk so fondly over your crush? Your shining smile growing with each second, eyes glimmering, galaxies held within your dark alluring orbs. It hurts so much knowing that I am not, and will never be the cause of those emotions. With these feelings, I know that you can never reciprocate them for me. But how can I bring up about that butterfly drawing, etched onto the skin of your collarbone, that I also have? The universe really hates me doesn’t it? Deciding our destiny for each other, just for you to turn a blind eye and ignore this horrible yearning in my chest. Each time you send heart eyes to her, I have to act as I am happy for you – which is half true, because indeed, I am happy for you. Genuinely. But at the same time, I can’t help but feel a burning jealousy, envy, and sadness all at the same time while trying to hold in the feeling of something burning up in my throat. Each time those beautiful petals of daffodils came out of my lungs, the lingering pain comes with it. Each time I cried myself to sleep, hoping that you could at least notice the feelings that I have tried to keep inside me, locked up, so I don’t have to confess to you. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t risk it, for the sake of the amount of time we spent together building what we have now. But I realize, no matter the amount of love, affection, care that I gave you. No matter how much I’ve sacrificed, just to go and comfort you, no matter how much things I’ve done for you, despite hearing the cracks of my heart and my brain telling me to stop and ignore you. I realized. I cannot love you into loving me. Ji Changmin, you're so cruel. Why must you cause so much pain to my heart? But it’s fine, I am more than delightful that you have decided to tie the string of fate for eternity between you and her. I wish you have a beautifully wedded life with her. I hope she takes care of you well. I’m sorry to have selfishly kept these hidden feelings from you for so long. I’m sorry I have to be selfish to keep myself from breaking further. But surprise, I guess?

By the time you’re reading this, I’ve already undergone surgery to remove the agonizingly painful flowers from within me. Happy wedded life my love. Love, Kang Yeseul. ______________

@riki00143 ddaengkyu for the help and encouragement <3333333

nishimura riki; photobooths (2)

(2/2) three words, eight letters.

previous part - (1/2) cotton candy.

pairing: nishimura riki x reader

genre: fluff, angst if you squint hard enough

synopsis: between two best friends who don't realize their feelings for each other just yet.

trigger warning(s): abit of swearing, ferris wheels?

word count: 1.7K

a/n: the ending to this im not really satisfied with but its been in my drafts for so long i've gotta just :D

~~

[6:55 PM]

it was starting to get dark, you were walking with a bunny plushie in hand that riki got for you at the balloon popping stall, and with riki walking right beside you of course. looking around to see whatever interested you both next.

for riki, he was just in his own world, going wherever you led him.

what was he thinking of? the moment you decided to name that bunny after him as soon as you had it in your hands with no hesitation, and that caught him off guard for a bit. now you're just going to have a bunny in your room named riki.

and of course, back at the cotton candy stall, when the lady called you both lovebirds, it made him feel a certain way.

that same feeling he gets every time you called him cute. or whenever you fixed his hair for him, whenever you brought him banana milk randomly, whenever you feed him random things, whenever he did something wrong on purpose just so you can do it for him instead.

that same feeling he always gets when he's around you.

his act of service, his constant teasing, his little gifts, his little notes he'd usually write you whenever he was bored in class, a lot of them contained with drawings of bunnies and funny looking strawberries cause he knew they were your favorite things, or just notes telling you that he liked your outfit that day.

the way he takes you places whenever he knew you were stressed or when you needed it, when he appears at your doorsteps whenever you texted him telling him that you weren't feeling your best, when he tries to compliment and make you feel better when you're down although he's bad it it, thats his love language.

yours was physical touch, like when you'd play with his hair, which he loved, when you'd drag him around by his hand or when you hug him when you're feeling down just for comfort.

your clinginess, like when you unconsciously hold his hand when you're in public places, when he's playing games with controller in hand but you're bored so you'd always end up laying on his lap, watching the screen although you don't understand anything that's going on, but since it's riki playing it, you're interested

your patience for him. he'd make mistakes and instead of getting annoyed over it, you'd calmly tell him to try again and would help him with it. whether with homework, cooking or anything you both decided to do together. or when he's feeling down and stressed, your arms and ears are always open for him. you're always there to listen and hug him whenever he needed.

your constant scolding whenever he purposefully did something wrong so that you'd do it for him instead, he'd enjoy it whenever you were mad at him just because he thought that its cute.

he loved everything about it.

he knew how you liked your coffee, what you wanted your pancakes with and how many you'd usually eat, your favorite colors. he knew when you'd get nervous just by how you fiddle with his hands, how you loved it when he'd comfort you by giving back rubs, hand rubs or head pats. just like you did for him. he knew every single tiny detail.

you don't know how much of an impact you took upon this boy, and he wasn't against any of it either as he loved every second of it.

whatever the other did, you both have no hesitations to give it a try too.

this was alot of emotions for a boy to keep to himself. it was the first time he felt like he wanted someone to know how much he liked them. which was why this whole date-like after school amusement park thing was a good idea. he was going to tell a girl that he liked her on her favorite ride in an amusement park, where it all started. he planned it all out 2 weeks prior.

why did it take two weeks when this whole idea popped into is little head in the span of 10 minutes? it's because he's nervous, he's never confessed to anyone, ever. and like the perfectionist that he is, he wanted everything to go as planned.

"riki look! a photo booth!" you pointed.

"y/n, no more pictures" riki replied, dragging his feet.

"i just want some pictures i can put in my phone case. its so blank right now, see?" you said, extending your arms and showing the back of your phone case directly at his face.

and with that he was already convinced, to miss the chance to get his face inside that clear phone case of yours? anything.

"didn't you just have a picture of that one k-pop idol you were obsessing over for weeks?" riki said smiling a bit, looking down at you.

"well yes, but i've looked at that same photo card too much it got kinda boring."

he remembered vividly how you were squealing at him over it about a week ago.

"alright, fine" he said in a stern tone, but was jumping around inside "but it has to be in there for at least 5 months".

"okay okay fine! let's take four sheets worth so we both got two sheets each okay?"

"alright."

and there he finds himself taking pictures with with you and riki the bunny in your arms. and that character hat he came to like because every once in a while you'd turn back to tell him that it looked cute on him.

riki being riki, he was awkward.

"smile a a bit won't you, nishimura?" you poked him, placing your chin on his shoulder staring right at him. he looked back down at you. gosh if he had to count how many times him heart rate accelerated today just because of one person.

snap

"alright just get your chin off me it hurts" he giggled and grabs you by your face to lift your head up

snap

"yah!" you tried grabbing his whole face too but it was more of a struggle with his hands blocking you view. at that point you both have forgotten you were taking pictures.

--

[7:15 PM]

you brought out your phone and popped off your phone case to settle the pictures in the right spot.

he really made to that phone case of yours, he thought.

popping it back on, you lifted your phone and started taking pictures of the view.

"y/n"

"hm?" you looked up, he was taking photos of the both of you.

"i'm sending these to my mom, she just texted me"

"send me them too"

after he was done, you handed your phone to him. "could you take a couple for me?"

he smiled, knowing what to do.

the lighting on your face was just perfect. and you couldn't look even more adorable with that bunny on your lap.

he started clicking, but of course, he couldn't miss this chance.

"here you go" he handed you back your phone

"riki these are all you!" you said swiping through them rapidly. he really just spammed the button didn't he

he laughed, "alright alright, i'll take you some" you handed it back but he brought out his instead

"no no, i feel like the lighting on my phone looks better, i'll airdrop them after"

smooth.

-

"i miss the feeling of being on ferris wheels" you said.

you knew damn well the last time you were on one was with him and it didn't end well.

"me too" he replied with a smile, looking back out to see the view.

nervously thinking of the right time to say the three words that he's practiced in front of the mirror in his bedroom countless times making sure he won't mess it up just for today.

the atmosphere was a lot different from when you both were last here, more lights, more lively, more stalls.

"riki?"

"y/n" he replied. you froze, not being able to mutter out your words. chanting in your head that it's now or never and that you can't keep chickening out when the timing is perfect. but nothing seemed to come out of you mouth.

three words, eight letters was all it took and yet it was so hard to say. being too scared of rejection, too scared of the outcome. you can't handle the thought of him ghosting you again. god knows whether or not he's going to ghost you or just cut you off for good.

it was just silence. you two were just looking in different directions, staring out of the ferris wheel.

again, you failed to say how you felt towards the boy. again, you tried changing the topic.

"people look like ants from up her-

"i like you, y/n"

"what?"

"i like you" he said, with no hesitation looking straight at you now but you were too nervous to look into his eyes right now. what the fuck.

"i do too riki"

"i don't mean it in a friendly way y/n." you paused to look at the boy, he continued, "i mean in way that means you make me feel things whenever i'm around you. i like you a lot, y/n"

"i like you too, riki."

your heart was thumping in your chest it felt like it was going to burst. you weren't on a roller coaster, it was just a ferris wheel but yet the excitement was incomparable. he confessed before you did.

thats when you realized that those pictures you took from the photo booth were also in his phone case.

riki was never the type to say or do these things, which took you by surprise. he just said he liked you.

like, like like you.

it was minutes of just looking around after that. to riki, this was new, never once in his life has he confessed and god if he was along right now he would be jumping around because he did it, and he didn't fuck it up.

"so, you wanna grab coffee tomorrow morning?" he said looking out

"yup"

"8?"

"yup"

he smiled looking down

the awkwardness was so thick, you could cut it with a knife.

what mattered at that moment though, was that it happened, you confessed. or he did. after years, it finally happened and you didn't get rejected, which is a big relief. it wasn't all that bad after all.

character hats, cotton candy stalls, bunny plushies, photobooths and ferris wheels. three words, eight letters. it all worked out.

~~

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park sunghoon; to the moon, never back.

,pairing: park sunghoon x reader

genre: fluff, drabble

synopsis: another night under the moonlight, with your lover.

trigger warning(s): n/a

word count: 0.6k words

a/n: wrote this while i was feeling under the weather yesterday, finished it tday. rlly love how it turned out ^^

~~

[11:50 PM]

his chest rises and falls, the sound of his heartbeat was calming, peaceful. he soothed his fingers through your hair as he hummed along to your favorite song. his other hand in yours, you fiddled with it, admiring his pretty hand.

it was quiet, but no words were needed to be said because at that moment, the only thing that was needed was the presence of each other.

with the sound of his hums, breaths, heartbeats and his fingers calmly running through your hair, it slowly lulled you to sleep. eyes becoming heavy as every minute passed by.

looking at your figure, he saw that you were asleep and smiled to himself. unaware that you were only lightly asleep, he kissed your head. the sudden action woke you up.

moving your head to look up at him confused, he then let out a little laugh, pausing from soothing your hair and rested his hand on top of your head. "im sorry, i didn't mean to wake you up" he said smiling, almost whispering, looking down at you, placing another kiss softly on your forehead.

you smiled in response, eyes still droopy.

the only source of light into the room was from your window. the moonlight reflecting on his face, he looks so unreal. his glowing eyes, tall nose, his perfect lips. everything about him drove you crazy.

you laid on his chest, staring up at him for a while. admiring his perfect features and anatomy, you could look at him all night and day. how did you get such a pretty boy for a boyfriend?

staring right back at you, he thought your sleepy face was the cutest thing he's ever seen, smiling to himself.

"baby?" he said, distracting your thoughts "you okay?"

"yeah"

"you sure? you look like you zoned out on me" he said chuckling.

"i wasn't zoned out, you're just... really pretty" you said, looking away from his face, trying to prevent him from seeing your flustered cheeks after confessing.

he laughed, looking at you in your embarrassed state. he didn't think he could possibly find you anymore cuter.

his hand lifted from holding yours and cupped your face, lifting it to make you look up at him as he caressed it gently. right then and there, he paused. admiring your features. he then kissed your forehead again, and then your eyebrow, your eyelids, the tip of your nose, your rosy cheeks, and then your lips.

you giggled at the tickling sensation. "how did i get such an adorable girl for a girlfriend, hm?" he giggled along.

"i love you." you said underneath your breath, his face slowly rested from smiling so hard to admiring you. "so much"

"i love you more" he replied

"i love you to the moon and back" you said inching closer to his face with a cheeky facial expression when he then also leaned in and kissed you.

this time it wasn't just a peck, it was passionate, slow, it felt heavenly even.

the kiss lasted a while before he pulled away. "i love you," he said, stroking your hair gently, looking at you with his eyes that seemed to be glowing, holding millions of stars behind them, just because he was looking at you. he continued, "to the moon, never back."

you laughed, "what does that even mean?"

"to the moon and back is too short of a distance to reciprocate how much i love you. i love you so much, to no ends."

you smiled, feeling emotional but not wanting to cry because you'd only end up with swollen eyes by the time the sun rises, he realizes and chuckles underneath his breath, moving his body to face you, hugging you even closer as if you two weren't already close enough.

"lets get to sleep, hm?" he whispered while patting your back.

oh how much you love this boy. you could literally bring him the moon if he asked you to.

~~~

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nishimura riki; photobooths. (1)

(1/2) cotton candy.

(2/2) three words, eight letters.

pairing: nishimura riki x reader

genre: fluff, a bit of angst if you squint hard enough

synopsis: between two best friends who don't realize their feelings for each other just yet.

trigger warning(s): driving lol

word count: 2.3k words

a/n: this is part one of two! i got escalated writing this so i decided to divide the whole thing into two :). this part's inspired by one of my most favorite songs, cotton candy by spill tab ^^. also, the way this is written is not organized nor descriptive and rather cuts to different scenes(?) idk if that makes sense lol

edit note: i messed up on the last upload, so im reposting it. sorry for the inconvenience.

~~

[7:05 AM]

it was already 7 in the morning, it felt as if you only got a few hours of sleep. which you did due to staying up late completing your piling assignments.

it felt as if you took a 2 second blink and its already the ass crack of dawn.

groaning, you dragged your feet out of bed, making your way to the bathroom. before you could even pick up your toothbrush, your phone started ring

again, you sighed but went to check who was calling this early and of course, it had to be riki.

“what is it nishimura” you said in a tired tone, not really in the mood due to your lack of sleep. “geez, someone woke up on the wrong side of bed today” you could literally hear the grin on his face right now.

“get to the point, i need to go brush my teeth”

“alright alright” he said laughing a little bit “i’ll be picking you up today”

“why so sudden?”

“why do i need an excuse to see my bestfriend, hm?”

“okay fine”

“by 8?”

“sure”

“alright you can continue brushing your teeth now, i will not disturb you anymore”

“you better”

“okay, bye” he said smiling, and then hung up.

__

[7:56 AM]

“bye mom!”

“bye sweetheart! tell him to drive safe!”

“i will!” you said walking out the door.

if there were anyone your parents trusted you most with, it would be the nishimuras. they only met two years ago but yours and riki's mom are the best of friends. riki, whenever it came to going out, traveling or taking care of himself, he was good at it. which was why it didn't take your mom a second thought as soon as you mentioned his name

as soon as you closed your front door, car honks could be heard. looking up to meet riki sitting in his car with that signature cheeky grin of his.

__

[3:30 PM]

it was halfway through last period, surprisingly, you got through it just fine despite the mentioned sleep deprivation mentioned earlier thanks to the coffee riki got you before picking you up this morning.

"psstt" you heard from behind. "give me your book"

"riki you're gonna get us in trouble" you mumbled. forth period math with mr. huang was hell, and hes very much well known in this school for how strict and straight forward he is. so being the typical good student you were, you'd want anything but to be involved in trouble with mr. huang.

"just give me your notebook y/n"

and so you did in order for him to shut up without questioning him because you assumed he had missing notes to note down. but not even a second after handing your book, he handed it back.

"first page" he whispered, and continued to listen to what mr.huang was explaining.

you flipped your book open to see a folded piece of notebook paper.

"amusement park after class? :)" it said, with two boxes with the options yes and no.

normally if it was a school day the next day, you'd tick no, which of course riki was well aware of, but it happened to be a friday today. instead of ticking it, you wrote something back below it.

"i'll need to ask my mom first" you scribbled, handing it back without turning.

the sound of his pencil scribbling could be heard, and then a tap on your shoulder

"dont worry, i asked your mom this morning already" he wrote.

you unconsciously turned back to give him a look. only to meet that darn smile of his he always had plastered on his face.

"ms. y/n? are you listening?"

"yes sir"

mr. huang gave a warning look, one that says "i know you weren't but i'll let you off the hook just this once". thank god

with that, you unfolded the piece of paper in your hand and ticked the box

--

[4:10 PM]

"when did you even call my mom?" you said, getting into the passenger's seat.

"i called her this morning after i called you"

"and she agreed?"

"yup, didn't she tell you?" he then reached out to your side, to get your seatbelt strapped on for you. why did he do this? no idea. but it's always been a habit of his to make sure you're settled before setting off. normally, you'd feel fine about it. it makes you grateful even, knowing that he cared. but this time, his face was close. making you hold your breath.

you never knew that your bestfriend was this good looking. of course you knew that, but it didn't usually make you feel the way you did at that moment. you waited for him to be done and return back to his seat.

"nope"

~~

[7:10 AM] ~ this morning

as your mom was preparing everybody's breakfast, her phone by the kitchen island rang, with the contact name "Riki" calling.

"hey darling, you wanna pick y/n up today?" she answered, laughing a bit because it was pretty much predictable. every time he called was about you.

with a little laugh in return, he answered shyly, "yes"

"alright, drive safe riki" she said as she was about to hang up.

"oh and mrs. park?"

"yes dear?"

"would it be okay if i take her to the amusement park after school? its a friday today," he sounded prepared to read a whole list as to why she should let him take you.

"of course riki, not a problem." she said with a huge smile plastered on her face, "she needs a little break after all, all she's been doing lately is staying in her room and studying. im sure you're aware of that."

"yes, thank you mrs. park. i'll make sure to have her home by 8"

it was hard to trust people with her one and only baby daughter with anyone taking her places unless it was your dad, jay or herself, anyone outside of the family in general. but with riki, she never worried once because she knew you'd return safe with him.

everybody knew he cared most when it came to you, it made her feel nothing but warmth with you around him.

"riki?"

"yes mrs. park?"

"thank you. you know, for taking care of y/n."

"it's alright mrs. park, im just doing what im supposed to. besides, enjoy her presence around me anyway" he said smiling looking down.

your mom laughed. "alright then dear, drive safe"

~~

[ 5:02 PM]

after a stop at a cafe to get you both something to eat, you finally arrived. here you were, stood by the entrance of the amusement park.

your eyes sparkled, you'd be lying if you said you weren't excited. after months of just pure studying, a little break would be nice. and riki knew that. he thought to himself that you needed this for the sake of your sanity and mental health, and so he planned the whole of today to be revolved around you just having fun.

he smiled to himself, admiring you. happy that you even agreed to this without bringing up assignments due. even if you did, he would've dragged you here anyway because he knew you needed this.

his thought was disturbed when he felt a grasp on his hand "come on we can't just stand here all day, nishimura" before he could respond, he was already being dragged to places.

--

[5:40 PM]

"come on, riki!" you said, trying to convince him to put on the character hat you had in your hands, matched to the one you had on yours. "no" he said, trying to get away from your figure with not so much effort thanks the height difference.

the way you were struggling on your tippy toes trying to reach his head made him giggle, finding it cute.

although he seemed like he was annoyed, he was secretly enjoying this. "gosh darn those vitamins" you said under your breath, which he heard, making him laugh.

"what are you laughing at?" you said now with your hands on your waist, looking at him with an offended look.

"nothing" he said grinning.

"just put it onnnn, it'll look cute on you" with that, he's already almost convinced to put it on.

"it'll only make me look like a fool" he said, moving his head upwards again so that you wont be able to reach

"come onn, put it on at least just for a couple of pictures?" you said swaying his arm a bit.

"fine, but you'll have to pay for my cotton candy" the boy's hand pointed at the nearby stall. "deal!" with that you made a jump while his eyes were focused on the stall, quickly putting the hat on him before he could say anything else.

"yah-"

"YOU LOOK ADORABLE" you said laughing.

again, his heart just did a backflip. in the span of a minute you just called him both cute and adorable. it was a lot to process, so he was just standing there looking at you.

"your mom needs to see this" you said excitedly bringing out your phone.

hearing the mention of his mom rang an alarm in his head. everybody knows riki's got that soft spot when it came to you. he just somehow can't say no, and even if he did, he'll always end up giving in. and knowing what his mom would have to say when she sees those pictures, he got embarrassed.

riki's a stubborn one when it comes to these things, and for his mom to know that you managed to make him put on the character hat? she will not stop talking about it for as long as she can remember, and riki's mom? not a forgetful woman.

"no no no, cotton candy" he said hurriedly, dragging you by the arm towards the stall.

little did he know, you were spamming your camera button.

walking towards the stall, you guys were met with a friendly lady who gave you a warm smile as soon as she saw you two. or maybe she was already admiring you both at that moment you were trying to convince him to put on his hat.

being easily distracted, you smiled back. "hello, what can i get for you lovebirds?" she said

"o-oh"

"i'll have a blue one, and she'll have a pink one, please" riki said before it got awkward, returning the friendly smile. he didn't deny it either, because he kind of liked it.

"yah, you can't just order for me without knowing what color i wanted" you said turning to him furrowing your eyebrows a bit.

"yeah? what color were you going to get?"

"...pink" you said looking back at what the lady was doing, making riki softly giggle. "still, you should've asked!"

"oh you know i don't need to" he said, smiling while looking at you all embarrassed.

"here you go sweetheart" the lady handed riki your cotton candies, smiling because she was listening to the whole conversation between you two, thinking to herself how exciting and heart warming love at youth was.

although he made a deal with you that you were going to pay for your cotton candies, he still paid.

"you guys want me to take a picture for you two?" the lady offered.

"oh no its okay-

"yes yes please" you said cutting riki off and handing the lady your phone.

you smiled, holding onto riki's arm with your pink cotton candy in hand, and blue in his.

"here you go! you two enjoy your time" the lady said waving at you two as you both walked away. "thank you!" you waved back.

"airdrop me those" riki said, looking straight forward.

"why the sudden change of mind? weren't you just sulking earlier because i said i was going to send them to your mom?" you said chuckling, eating your cotton candy.

"i wasn't sulking, and plus i just want those pictures in my phone for memories. and im sure a couple of them makes your face look funny, they'd be perfect for my lock screen." or maybe just because those pictures only consists of him and you.

you scoffed, "you're unbelievable".

~~

[6:55 PM]

you knew that this whole thing was meant for you and him to relax and have fun but you cant help but feel a bit down.

not because you weren't working on your schoolwork, but because this was the exact same location you got technically rejected by the boy standing right next to you.

on that same ferris wheel that came to sight after looking around for a while.

it was 5:00 PM on a saturday, you and riki were on your first ever hang out together.

your last ride of the day was the ferris wheel, looking around pointing out things that aren't usually seen if you both weren't this high up. you tried to look back at him to see what he was doing, but he was already looking in your direction, and because of how close your faces were, your lips touched by accident.

he avoided you for a week after that, only to come back to talk to you by your locker casually again, that kiss became an unsaid thing and you two never spoke about it ever since.

you were going to attempt to confess again, in the ferris wheel. but you were a nervous wreck, who knows if you were going to try to change up the topics again when the time was right, like you always do.

every time you tried to confess again after that incident, you always end up changing the subject again when its time, too afraid of rejection, telling yourself that at least you get to be around him. and you didn't want to ruin all that.

trying to distract yourself, you looked around and spotted a photo booth.

"riki look! a photo booth!" you pointed.

~

little did you know, riki was also planning out how he was going to tell you that the boy liked you inside his little head.

~~

inspiration song link! - cotton candy, spill tab (also in the playlist below)

check out my playlist! (pls)

~~

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one, two, three, four times too much - l.hj

pairing: lee jaehyun x female reader

genre: pure angst

word count: 1.6k

note: i do not condone cheating at all, this is just purely made up and it's a fiction only.

one.

'babe i'm home!' hyunjae's yell was heard throughout the shared apartment of him and his girlfriend.

ever since that time that hyunjae bumped into her on her first day at work and messed up her clothes, so he offered her his coat.

and that's how they ended up together, until now.

not forever.

'hi babe' seola greeted her boyfriend with a smile on her face.

hyunjae greeted her with a warm hug, which to her, isn't that warm.

the smell of a sweet, floral scent filled up her nostril, which is a huge contrast to his usual woody cologne. a dark bruise, hidden away under his ears, and a faint red lipstick stain on the collar of his shirt, which didn't go unnoticed by her.

with a small frown on her face, seola still displayed a solemn smile.

'i made dinner, your favorite.' 'really? this is why i love you babe.' he said cheerily, dropped his bag and went to the kitchen.

seola went to take the bag and place it neatly on the drawer, when she saw something slipped from the bag.

it was a red lace underwear.

with a pessimistic expression, she grabbed the bag and tried to ignore whatever she just saw.

trudging back to the kitchen island, she sat beside her boyfriend, who was happily munching away the food.

but she can't get what she saw earlier off of her mind.

hyunjae, who noticed her gloomy expression quickly asked, 'babe are you okay?', making her break from her trance, 'yeah, i just,' taking a deep breathe, she tried forming a sentence, 'are you cheating on me?'

with that, hyunjae quickly dropped his food, his eyes pleading for her not to leave him, 'i'm sorry babe please. you know i love you right? i truly do, please don't leave me, that will never happen again.' he begged.

seola was puzzled, he really did cheat on me...

'it's fine, i forgive you.' she said softly. hyunjae was over the moon, his heart filling with relief.

there will never be a second time. hopefully not.

two.

mentally and physically strained from the hectic amount of work today, seola returned home rubbing her bicep in discomfort, she expected to see the love of her life there in the living room, welcoming her home with a happy smile that could light up her mood.

but instead, the familiar scent that she smelt a week ago, came back rushing back to her the moment she stepped foot inside of her home.

there was no sight of hyunjae, that is until he leapt from their shared bedroom.

'babe, i didn't know you were coming home this soon.'

'it's 10:37PM jae...'

'oh really? haha,' he awkwardly rubbed his nape, 'i didn't look at the time, sorry.' he said.

seola slowly scanned her boyfriends appearance.

messy bed hair, wrinkled shirt. that's okay, its 10PM he could've just gotten out of bed, seola tried to convince herself.

until she spotted that darn bruise, marking his collarbone that he tried to hide but failed miserably.

walking further in, she saw 2 wine glasses, of which the wine bottle beside it is his favorite one. a bright alluring red colored lipstick on one, looking as if someone had just taken a sip from it.

not taking her eyes off from the sight she slowly parted her lips to ask, 'did you invite someone here?'.

hyunjae had a haunted look on his face, 'uh, yeah, mom was here you know. she likes to surprise visit at random time. she really wanted to meet you but you weren't here.'

seola hummed as an answer. 'doesn't she hate sweet perfume?'

hyunjae panicked even more, calming himself to answer 'dad bought it for her recently and you know he forget things a lot, so he forgot that she doesn't like sweet scented perfume. she must've felt bad.' he quickly rapped, trying to keep a stable expression and voice.

'ah...' seola replied cheerlessly, letting a million of scenarios seep into her brain.

'i'll go to bed first.' she said looking at him dead in the eyes, basically saying -i know that's not the truth- and he perfectly understood that.

three.

the couple laid in their bed, comfortably cuddling with each other, when hyunjae's phone rang.

'ah, sorry babe i gotta take this real quick.' he told her softly before picking himself up and went outside of their room.

seola was never the type to stick her nose in anyone's business, but what business does her boyfriend has to keep him so busy, even during their free day.

slowly tiptoeing her way to the close door, she pressed her ears on it to eavesdrop on his conversation.

'-wait for me to be there alright? i'm with her right now. i'll find an excuse. stay there and don't be naughty. keep on-' that was all seola heard before the sound of his voice slowly disappears, indicating that he's walked away from their bedroom door.

she despondently walked back to bed and covered herself with the cover, soon a tear trickled, then two, then three, the waterfall of tears pooled on her pillow as she sniffled, stuffing her face in the plushie-that he bought her on their first anniversary- trying to keep the sobs hidden.

their bedroom door creaked open, revealing hyunjae.

'i'm so sorry babe, i promised that we'd have the whole day together but there was something urgent that came up at work and they needed me to-' 'just go.' she said groggily, cutting him off without lifting her face to look at him.

he placed a gentle peck on her forehead before picking up his car keys and leaving.

one more chance lee jaehyun, one more chance.

four.

four times. four times that she's caught him and turning a blind eye on it. four times of him doing it with no conscience that he might be hurting her the slightest bit. four times of her washing away his stained collar.

this last time really pulled the trigger. she walked into his office, to see another woman,

on his lap, her lips all over him.

seola was quick enough to close the door just as she opened it.

four fucking times that she'd been betrayed.

seola had had enough. she doesn't want to confront him, because why should she? it's not like he's gonna change. once a cheater, always a cheater.

with her luggage packed and hyunjae asleep, she planned to leave him in the middle of the night. until he woke up, patting the side of his bed and having no presence of his girlfriend beside him.

or is she even his girlfriend anymore?

'babe?' he opened the bedroom door, sleepily rubbing his eyes until her got a clearer view of what was in front of him.

'what are you doing..?' he asked, glazed at the sight of his girlfriend's luggage, and her dressed up.

still not turning around to meet him in the face, seola quickly blinked away the tears that threatened to fall.

'let's break up.' she quickly say before pulling her stuff with her.

hyunjae hurriedly and confusedly ran to stop in front of her.

'seola, baby, why? what's wrong? why are you doing this? please stop joking, it's not funny.' he rapped, bug eyed glancing at her every feature.

seola stifled a chuckle. 'you know what's funny though? finding out that the person you love so dearly, cheating on you. forgiving them many damn times cause you still love them and expected a change. but that didn't happen.' slowly looking into his now guilty eyes.

'baby please, let me explain, we can work this out hm? please i won't do it anymore.' hyunjae dropped on his knees, begging for forgiveness which leaves a pang of pain to her already shattered heart.

'four times lee jaehyun. four times. i gave you four chances and you decided to throw it away like it's nothing. i kept forgiving and forgiving, but don't you know that i'm suffering? everyday i kept questioning myself, 'am i not pretty enough, am i not skinny enough, am i too dumb, too clingey' i question all about me,' seola stopped mid sentence to take a deep breathe, 'jae-ah,' the name felt bitter in her mouth, 'you know i still love you, i will always do, i know that for sure you can change for the better.' she smiled softly, hands cupping his face, wiping away the tears that adorned the pretty face that she fell in love with.

slowly removing the ring from her finger, hyunjae panicked even more, 'no no no no no, seola please, please, don't do this please don't take it off, i swear i can be better. i'll cut her off. i won't talk to any girls if you want me to okay? please don't do this i'm begging you!'

forcefully grabbing hyunjae's hand, dropping the promise ring that he gave her that she never once took off ever since the start of their 5 year relationship.

the shape of the ring engraved itself into the skin of her finger, the longer she stared at it, the longer she wanted that ring back on her finger, but she knew she had to give it up.

walking away with her luggage, she closed the door of their apartment, hearing his broken sobs and whimper made her want to run back to him, to tell him she still loves him, to tell him that she still forgives him.

'i still love you lee jaehyun. we'd meet again in the future if we're really destined for each other. but now, four times is too much.'

_______________________

taglist: @t5u, @dailykitplusmelatoinin

a/n: phewww i'm writing this at 12:03AM lolol im glad i dont have school tomorrow. i apologize if some part is a little weirdly written as i am currently lacking braincells, and english isn't my first language. i welcome all criticism <3333

sim jaeyun; paper butterflies.

pairing: jake x reader / sim jaeyun x reader / jake sim x reader

genre: fluff

synopsis: where your boyfriend is adorably in love with you.

trigger warning(s): stress, insomnia (mental health in general)

word count: 0.9k

a/n: i had the random motivation to write this, so i did. short but i rlly like it

it was like any other school day, you felt dead walking along the hallways as people were chatting, making their way to their next class or at their lockers.

"morning baby" a familiar voice said from behind, followed by an arm snaking around your waist from behind. you looked up to your side to find your one and only boyfriend with his little puppy smile.

you smiled, he then gave you a kiss on your upper temple. "rough night? did you stay up late again?" he said, rubbing his thumb where his hand was placed on your side, pulling you closer as if you weren't already pressed against his body.

"no bub, just tired"

he was well aware that you have been overworking although he's told you not to. its the last year of highschool and you're more stressed out then ever. and it's not just school. of course it's draining, even for him. but he knows its not just that. you haven't been feeling your best with everything else as well.

he sighed, moving his hand away from your waist to rub your head. "don't overwork yourself baby" he then rest his head on yours as you both made your way to your first period. "mhm"

--

it was during your last period. you had your head rest on your palm, looking up at the board.

school's been hard on you, and with everything else going on in your life it was hard to concentrate at school. making it a habit to catch up late at night because of your insomnia. leading to sleepless nights.

ever since you told him about your insomnia, jake would text you late at night to make sure you were asleep. and if you weren't, he would facetime you so you had some company.

but other nights, you feel stressed out and when you begin to overthink and unable to go to sleep, you'd decide to study to distract yourself. which would usually go on past midnight. during these times, you wouldn't face time jake although he insists, because he needs sleep and you really don't want to bother him.

you zoned out, but came back to focus when a hand slid a folded piece of paper in front of you. it was jake of course, he was your seat mate.

you took the piece of paper and gently unfolded it. you smiled immediately.

"wanna come over to my place after school? mum's making ur favorite today because i asked her to. and layla misses u :( "

when he mentions layla? and his mom cooking? you couldn't say no.

you looked over to him to give him a nod, he smiled and made half a heart with his fingers, just enough for you to see it, but below the desk. how cute.

"focus" you whispered, he then made a sad face at you, you held his hand that was making the heart to put it on your lap as you went back to focusing on what the teacher was saying, having to let go when you realized you had to take notes.

not even 5 minutes later you heard a whisper. "baby look, i made you something" you were ready to give him a little scolding for not focusing but he then handed you a paper butterfly, making you smile widely, admiring it.

you looked over to him to see what he was doing, only to make eye contact because he had been looking at you the entire time. "how'd you make this?" you looked at him laughing a little bit. putting your hand out for him to give it to you.

"i maybe learnt it from my mom, specifically to make one for you" he said shyly, but at the same time proud with his little puppy smile.

ughhhhhh what is he so cute for

normally, whenever he got bored in class, he'd fold little paper hearts and slide it over to you, or write small notes, which you treasure and you've put every single one he gave you in a box. every time, it would make you happier no matter how you were feeling. but this time it was a whole butterfly he made from his notebook paper.

he spent the effort to learn small cute things to do for you and it's literally the cutest thing ever.

"does it look okay? that one's my forth attempt" he said, making you laugh. "oh it's more than okay, jake, it's perfect." you replied. "and i would pester you with kisses right now, but we're in the middle of a class"

"aw bummer, i should've given it to you after class then"

"no worries, you can get them after class"

"i should make you these way more than i planned to if this is my reward, might as well make another one right now" he said teasingly leaning a bit closer to you, making you embarrassed.

"oh you shut up."

"i love you too" he said giggling, knowing that it made you feel a lot better.

gosh you can't explain how much you love this boy. he treats you so well, making sure you feel okay and always trying to make you smile every time you're not alright, he's always there to accompany you and his ears and arms are always open whenever you need it. he's there to comfort you by hugging and giving you little kisses.

he may give you paper butterflies made from notebook papers in real life to show his random affection towards you, which is literally the most adorable thing ever, nothing can ever compare to the butterflies he gives you on the inside every time you're around him.

~~

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