Kanzi Is A One Of The Coolest Apes I Have Ever Had The Pleasure Of Reading About. Look Him Up!

Kanzi is a one of the coolest apes I have ever had the pleasure of reading about. Look him up!

Kanzi the bonobo chimp learns to create tools by himself - repeating humanity’s first steps towards civilisation | Mail Online

A breif history on the development of socialist communities within the democratic state of Israel

Before presenting the limerick, some background knowledge might be necessary:

Chalutz or Halutz - Hebrew: חָלוּץ‎‎, pl. halutzim), Hebrew for a pioneer. It may refer to early Jewish immigrants to Palestine, including Hovevei Zion and Bilu during the First Aliyah, which generally pre-date the founding of Zionism. 

Source: Wikipedia

Kibbutz -  noun, plural kib·but·zim [-boot-seem] 

(in Israel) a community settlement, usually agricultural,organized under collectivist principles*.

Source: Dictionary.com

* collectivist principles, meaning (basically) that everything was shared by all the kibbutz members. This ranged from the profit made by their crops, to dish duty, to living quarters, and even to child-rearing. As interesting as this may sound in theory, it was much more difficult in practice, and most current kibbutzim have become less strict about sharing absolutely everything, while remaining true to the original ideals.

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With that in mind, please proceed to the following poem (all that buildup is going to kill the limerick, so for my sake, please set your expectations to "low and terrible")

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Back in the day a Chalutz Decided to join a Kibbutz. He was unaware Among what they share Was a rash that they passed knockin' boots.

~

Also, in case I haven't already explained this limerick to death, "knocking boots" is a euphemism for sex. Apparently this is not common knowledge. 

Keith Haring and his subway drawings

Todd Akin, the reddest of red, Has turned to abortion instead. For the pregnancies quit If the rape is legit— Or so all his sources have said.

(via partisancheek)

(Image from)

Melodramatic people seldom make good traveling partners

While traveling near Machu Picchu, 

He dabbed at his tears with a tissue.

He said "Life is pain."

I replied with distain,

"You wouldn't know joy if it bit you."