Felix X Reader X Chan18+ Only, Minors Dnithemes: Suggestive, Bit Of Dacryphilia, Some Comfort

felix x reader x chan 18+ only, minors dni themes: suggestive, bit of dacryphilia, some comfort

[1:56] It’s about 2 a.m. when you realize Chan’s warmth isn’t near you anymore. You look around the dark room only making out the cracked door with fairly bright light seeping in. It’s a bit strange as Chan always turns off all the lights at night. Even if he’s awake he tries to turn on as few as possible so as not to disturb you.

You slip from under the covers. Sliding your feet into slippers, you quietly go to look for Chan. As soon as you leave the room, you hear hushed voices. He’s obviously not alone. Not too strange as the members pop in whenever, especially since some of them have developed sleepless habits from their insomniac leader.

It becomes clear this isn’t a normal visit as the sound of sobbing becomes clear. As you enter the living room you see a sad felix hunched over. Chan has a hand on his back trying in vain to calm the younger man. From his wet chest you can tell he had been holding him for quite sometime before now.

Almost on autopilot, you rush over only to be stopped by your boyfriend’s hand. He shakes his head as if not wanting you to get involved but you can’t help it. 

“Lixxie” you call. He looks up quickly, face red and wet with so many shed tears. He looks at you for a second before his face crumbles. Your heart clenches painfully at the sight. You had only been a few steps away when Chan stopped you so it takes only one long stride to grab him in your arms.

He wraps his arms around you, holding tight as he sobs into your stomach. His whole body shakes with emotion. His breathing grows uneven and you soothe his back whispering to “Breathe for me. Deep breaths” Chan’s hand soothed his lower back as well. He looked on, almost seeming in pain at the despair of one of his boys.

He finally pulls back to look up at you again. You crouch down and hold his cheek as he only looks at you, almost in quiet awe. You see him looking over your features with those pretty sparking eyes. They look even prettier with those crystalline tears. You swallow the thoughts quite literally. “Fel-”

He kisses you before you can finish. It feels almost unreal at first. Despite the speed at which he moved to claim your lips, it was soft like you had shamefully imagined many times over. After a moment(you’re honestly unsure just how long, but definitely longer than you should have) you pull back. You blink incredulously at him before looking over to Chan. Though it somehow felt like just you and Felix were in the room, that was still far from the case. Your boyfriend sat there watching you indulge in another man. His friend. His emotionally vulnerable friend.

But looked back at you calmly. “Chan”

“It’s ok. Make him feel better baby. Doesn’t he deserve it?” His words were spoken surely and sincerely. And by the raise of his brow, that question was not rhetorical.

You looked back to the boy whose face you were now holding at a small distance. His soft eyes were pleading with you but were also curious of your answer, wanting to mask the sadness. He needed this.

“Of course he deserves it. He’s a good boy.”

just a finale

18+ • drabble • yunho • pt. 1 • pt.2 • pt.3  • pt.4 • pt.5 • pt. 6

I don't usually speak before these but I wanted to say thank you for loving this series. I clearly made this around new years to be released, well, uh on new years but...it's April now so whatever

Again though, thank you for loving the series. I hope more people can see it even though it's over now and enjoy it as well.

for the next two months, you were working busy days and having quiet nights. christmas provided you an escape from your guilt for a bit as you visited family.

but now it was new years. for the sake of your sanity, you accepted an invitation to a countdown party at a club you were a semi-regular at. you hadn’t expected it to be as wild as it was when you arrived nor did you expect to see your friend, with a new man no less. you made eye contact and she winked. you just looked on in confusion for a second before a friend dragged you to dance.

after a while, you slipped away to the bathroom upstairs farthest from the main dance floor. usually, the upstairs was mainly blocked off anyway. thankfully it wasn’t overflowing with people in tight dresses trying to get to a toilet before their shots came back to haunt them. you leaned over the sink to get a better look at the small smudge of makeup under your eye when-

“oh my god, hi!!” you caught a glimpse of her in the mirror first as she ran up to the sink next to you to wash her hands. a sizable hickey sat right in the crook of her neck making you feel uncomfortable. you weren’t sure if it was from yunho or the new man she was cuddled up with. to say you were confused would be an understatement.

“uhh h-hi”

“I haven’t seen you in forever!” she leans against the sink, giddy with a tipsy giggle.

“y-yeah, and now i think i was missing a few chapters.”

she makes an amused face with her tongue out. “just a bit of fun”

“b-but what about…” you trail off but she looks at you expectantly like she doesn’t know. “...yunho?”

her eyes go wide. “oh! yeah” she laughs to herself then groans “that’s been over. I never meant for that to be a long term thing anyway but i did try i promise.”

you listen in confusion as she tries to clean up her makeup, any lipstick she had on now completely gone. remnants of it smudged all around her mouth “i tried to make it last longer, even thought about suggesting an open relationship but I just couldn’t do it anymore. couldn’t handle the double life, if you get what i mean. he was getting really…i don't know, distant i guess, anyway.”

“wait, i’m confused.” 

she sighed then chuckled. “don’t make me say it.” from the purely lost look on your face she continued. “I can’t do monogamy, babe. I don’t even know how it happened with him. I tried but I couldn’t do it. I thought the idea of an open relationship might scare him so I just did what I do best.” she winked and turned to leave with a smile “he ended it not long after anyway.”

she spoke the last part so nonchalantly that you felt almost more confused than before she spoke as you watched her leave. but she stopped for a second turning back with a genuine smile. “i know we aren’t the closest but don’t be a stranger anymore, yeah?’

a heavy smile finds its way to your face as you nod “yeah”

you think she can sense there’s something you want to say but leaves instead.

you stood there a few more moments before leaving the restroom, trying to process what she just told you. you contemplated leaving, as you looked out into the sea of people currently lit up blueish purple. stood at the top of one of the staircases that face each other in the large rotunda, you tried to uncloud your head when you saw a familiar figure walking down the other set of stairs. he was talking with two other men but his eyes were searching the room.

you quickly turned away and slipped between people as he started to look in your direction. you knew this club for its less busy days so you followed a route you knew to the back stairs and up to the roof. you abandoned your heels halfway up. part of the bar has a big skylight glass ceiling to look up at the sky and the attached piece on the side was a small rooftop where the owner kept a personal area. It was usually unlocked as most didn’t know about the area behind the locked gate but you knew how to slip by it. he knew you went up there now but he didn’t mind. It was nice, nothing extravagant but very calm. exactly what you needed right now.

you looked to the dozens of buildings around that had people celebrating as well.

you hear the door open and nearly jump out of your skin. in all the times you’ve been up here, no one has come but the owner and you knew he wouldn’t as he said “I’m too old to be here at night. I just come to make sure none of my shit is broken”

the tall figure emerged from the doorway with soft eyes.

you grew irritated immediately and confused. “how did you get up here?”

“how did you?”

you turned back to the sky. “the owner knows I come up here.

he didn’t say anything else but you could hear him approaching. the sky was sprinkled with people lighting their own fireworks before the extravagant ones go off at midnight. they looked so tiny in different parts of the sky. you admired them so much you hadn’t noticed him come next to you. he eyed you as you looked on. both leaning on the edge, caught up in two different things.

you finally realized, side eyeing him. “what?”

he sighed deeply with apologetic eyes “y/n-“

“don’t”

“what i-?”

“don’t. I don’t need you to say anything.“ it came out a bit meeker than you hoped that time but it got the point across.

he bites down on his lips in contemplation before speaking again. “is it because I didn’t reach out? I thought you might need space but there are so many things I wanted to say-“

“it’s because you left me to go see her!” this shocked you both as you spit the words out quickly only letting a few seconds pass before you continued.  “It’s because I know that everything we did was wrong but I can’t help but feel thrown to the side. It’s because I keep forgetting that it’s not you and me.”

after a few more moments of silence, you say. “I spoke to her.” his head shot up. “more like listened but i know you aren’t together anymore.”

silence followed the last sentence as you contemplated what to say next. you felt the words were going to break your voice before you even spoke them “why didn’t you call?”

he didn’t answer. “if you weren’t with her anymore why didn’t you call? why didn’t you come over? w-why didn’t you try??”

“because that is fucking terrifying.” wide eyes looked at him, finally seeing how tense he looked. all kinds of emotions stirred in his head “y/n, that is terrifying. i have wanted to be with you for so long. the only time i wasn’t a coward was when an opportunity threw itself at me with that phone call. after what happened at the spa i couldn’t even begin to figure out how to dig myself out of the hole I’d somehow gotten myself in. even though I messed around first, i knew she was cheating on me, i knew the whole fucking time. but I still should have ended it rather than pretend I already had. hell, i shouldn’t have even said yes to her in the first place. but now what right did I have to be happy when i was a cheater myself?” the silence stretched for a minute.

“yunho-”

“I don’t want you to look at me as some cheater. I take responsibility for everything I did to both of you. I want you to trust that I didn’t do it to hurt you or play with your feelings. I’m so sorry””

you do know that but something keeps your mouth shut. as you look away back to the now still sky his tears finally fall. “I want you to just hear me out. Ok?” he puts a hand on your cheek gently and you turn back to him.

“I can’t even say anything that no cheater has said before but I’m still going to say that I want you. I have never wanted someone so bad” his eyes are desperate and pleading as they stare into yours “and I don’t just mean like that phone call or in the car. I want you in every conceivable way”

you watched his eyes turn dark, the lust swimming under the desperation was just as genuine. the invisible barrier between you two kept now only by his willpower crumbled.

if you’re being honest, you wanted to hold out longer, still having things to say but when he kissed you, you felt everything he wanted to say and vice versa. 

the way his lips feel against you, you want to stay there forever. there is something lighter. maybe the knowledge that he isn’t someone else’s anymore. or the lack of guilt of at your friend waiting on him. he feels it too as he smiles against your lips.

he pulls away for a moment and the tears that ran over contrast with the wide smile on his handsome face. you go to speak but he’s kissing you again, determined to funnel all his words into his actions. 

his arms come from where they were wrapped around you to grip your hips. it’s almost as if he doesn’t think about it as he guides you against him. 

when he moves away it’s almost as if he doesn’t know what to do. there are so many things he wants to do that his brain almost short circuits but when your sweet voice calls to him he smiles and knows just what to do. he wants to feel you. he’s wanted it for so long. 

all the invisible barriers and rules places between you for the sake of keeping flimsy morals were gone now. he had so much to prove to you.

the wetness on his thigh told him alot but he needed to prep you thoroughly. he wasn’t one for bragging outside of teasing but he was big. probably bigger than anyone you’d had based on your reaction in the car and the last thing he wanted to do was hurt you.

he slipped a hand under your dress and slid two fingers across your slit before sliding them right into your entrance. the way you moaned into his neck was the first test of patience.

he bit his lip, working you open before adding another finger. the grip you had on the nape of his neck tightened. that was the second.

you leaned further back, pulling him with you onto the small lip on the wall. your legs opened wider, wanting more of him. of course you knew why he was so insistent about using his fingers but you wanted one thing right now. your voice pitched as he curled his fingers, hitting just the right spot.

his third test of patience proved to be his breaking point after you came. he held you tightly, stilling his fingers. he knew you were about to say something to break him when your hand tightened on his nape again. “can i have your big cock now?”

it was his hand that dug into you this time. the hand behind your back grabbed you with the other coming to grab a thigh. he hoisted you up further, with your back now partially on the bottom of the glass ceiling, enough for you to look down at the party goers beneath you when you looked back.

you didn’t give them much thought though as he was finally unzipping his pants. when he was fully out you felt the hottest excitement shoot through you.

a momentary possessive thought sprung to mind. ‘mine now’ you buried it with moans as you lightly played with your clit. he came closer, eyes seeming to reveal the same possessive thought.

he kissed you again, passion leading the charge with the flames turned up to a thousand as he rolled his cock against you. the sound you made was nothing short of obscene but it felt like the purest thing to him.

finally he sank into you. his head threatened to fall back from how good it felt but he couldn’t miss your face. you seemed to have the same idea but were fighting a losing battle. thankfully he used a big hand to hold your head, caressing your cheek with his thumb as he did so. your eyes were lidded but you could still make out his beautiful face. the outline of his mouth in the most beautiful groan you’d ever heard, eyes filled with lust fixed only on you. the gentle hand that was still somehow sturdy enough to hold your head in place. all this while he made you impossibly full. he used his other hand to push your thighs open a little wider, wanting to be as deep as possible.

once his hips met yours he leaned down to place a soft kiss on your cheek. his lips lingered before he pulled away ever so slightly to whisper. “make love now or fuck?

the implications of his words were strong, strong enough to catch your breath but you surprisingly had words to reply.

“its too fucking cold. fuck now, love later.”

he chuckled. “i was thinking the same. we’ve got alot of later to love”

even if you had something to say, you couldn’t before he made his first move. experimental and shallow but enough to erase words from your mouth. it only took two more of those before he was catching a pace. deep and fast.

he pulled out before sinking back in quicker than you would’ve thought. his hips moved more skillfully than you thought possible, knocking any thoughts right out of your head. his hands moved to grip your waist tightly. the flow of his hips coupled with how full you felt had you already filling with heat but the moment he pushed your thighs up and hit your spot you lost all semblance of language. tugging down the top of the flimsy dress, he moaned at the sight. despite the cold the look on his face as your breasts moved takes away any complaint only more moans.

“it’s ok, be as loud as you want.” he spoke in choppy sentences from his movements. you couldn’t even respond, mouth open with repressed pleasure threatening to blow from every nerve in your body while you whimpered and stretched into the increasingly noisy night. you couldn’t hold out much longer.

the faint sound of something behind you tingling the back of your brain but realization didn’t hit until yunho started counting as well. “5…4…-”

you gripped one of the wrists holding your thigh down tight, almost bracing yourself “yunho”

“3…2…-”

…

“1”

the cracking and exploding of fireworks above you masked your loud and obscene sounds. reds and greens and blue expanding above you almost an extension of the sensations. he took all of your sounds as fuel, not stopping as you arched and writhed. even his name getting lost in the cheers and explosions.

the pressure on your sensitive spot didn't stop. he hit over and over, bending over to bite at your neck. the feel of his breathy groans against you almost too much. despite the sensitivity, you moved to wrap an arm around his back and the other holding the back of his neck. “please cum”

it was your voice again that drove him to the edge. the sound like sugar leading him to heaven as he came as deep inside you as he could. with the most pornographic and shameless moan only for your ears he moved sloppily through his high finally dragging to a stop with his head still in your neck.

you’re so close to the skylight you’re able to see some people kissing and drinking the night away. at some point you make eye contact through hooded lids with your friend. she sees you over her dates shoulder with a suspicious hand under her skirt as she gives you a sly smile and a wink.

you blink unsure of what to do before chuckling. you’ve come a long way from the phone call.

he carefully pulls out and turns you around to lean on the glass ceiling, focused on more fireworks going of at a building in the distance.

he holds your shaking form against him not bothering to cover your chest from those who have taken an interest in you two.

his smile can he felt against your skin as he nuzzles into your neck. “have I proven it yet?”

“what?” you breathe out heavily with his smile growing wider as you feel him slipping himself back in.

“that you’re mine.”

♡ series masterlist ♡

Aroha, please don’t take this as “failure” or your fault

Moonbin has been so amazingly loved by us but (speaking from experience) you can’t make someone stay for you alone. Society collectively still has a long way to go with mental health. We seen many times an artist being vocal about it and even channeling into their art and still passing. People need more than kind words. Those are always needed but people need therapy and/or medication, less toxic work environments, etc etc.

I can be surrounded by love and still need to be admitted. I can hear a dozen positive things but the one negative will stick the longest. I can have tons of good things happen but one bad thing ruins my day. I need medication. I need therapy. I need a better environment. I NEED more than happy people.

WE need more than happy people.

Please please, right now just…

breathe

Talk to someone. Or be alone.

Laugh at something that makes you happy. Cry to sad music.

Write a random story. Write about your pain.

But please just don’t take this as a failure. We loved him as much as we could and we always will.

Remember him for everything he’s given us, not how he left us

I haven’t done requests in so long. I have some drafts I’m working on making readable but if you have a request you can send it.

I mainly do yunho(ateez), chan(skz), and felix(skz) but I’ve done a lot more. You can send atz, skz, and my ogs: bts

© FROM. ZERO

Oh shit, I coulda sworn I posted the angel boyfie felix x bratty mischievous boyfie beomgyu x reader thing forever ago. either here or on my other tumblr.

I just found the draft and I don't see the post so now I'm confused

oh, well, uh, get ready for that shit.