18+ PICK A CARD How Can You Improve Your Sex Life With Your Partner?

18+ PICK A CARD ⋆ how can you improve your sex life with your partner?

reminder that this is a general reading and messages found here may not apply to everyone. take what resonates, leave what doesn't, and don't force anything if it does not fit.

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GROUP ONE

cards · strength, nine of pentacles, ten of wands, eight of swords, five of cups (reversed). waning moon: let go of that which is causing you inner turmoil. now is a time for casting away emotions that are no longer serving you. moon totem – wolf: beware of letting your wilder instincts spin out of control.

my dear group one ♡ one way that you can improve your sex life with your partner is to take a more proactive role and be the one who takes control and initiates change. your partner may not be feeling either way about your sex life as it is, thinking that it’s a bit dull or unsatisfying but to be expected as time passes and as you have sex with the same person over and over.

that’s not to say that they do not enjoy it, rather that you both would benefit from the excitement that exploring new things can bring.

sex can be many things, and one of the best things about being with someone for a long period of time is that you two get to explore the world of sex together. grow and learn together.

it will be a good decision to talk to your partner about where they find sex lacking and what are some things they would like to add or change. create an open discussion between you and your partner and decide what the two of you can try out together. remember, too, that sex isn’t one-sided or only about your own pleasure and that is okay to put yourself a bit out of your comfort zone for your partner’s pleasure—especially if you are expecting them to push themselves a bit out of theirs.

also do not forget that improving your sex life is not just about penetration and what you two can do in sex, but about fostering intimacy in all areas of your life.

where are you not making your partner feel loved, cared for, and appreciated on the day-to-day? how are they not making you feel loved, cared for, and appreciated on the day-to-day? how could this be affecting your shared sex life?

open and honest communication is key! even if it is hard. 

GROUP TWO

cards · two of swords, five of pentacles (reversed), the tower (reversed), eight of wands, death. waning moon: let go of that which is causing you inner turmoil. now is a time for casting away emotions that are no longer serving you. moon totem – cow: a new beginning, or even a new life.

my dear group two ♡ you are currently feeling as if sex with your partner is boring and that it is your partner who needs to do something in order to make your sex life exciting again.

you’re looking at them and thinking, “well other people talk about how their partner does this in bed and my friend talks about how their partner does that to them,” but you’re not actually telling your partner that you’re unsatisfied or doing anything to make bring some pleasure and satisfaction back into your shared sex life.

your partner is not psychic! they will not know what’s wrong if you don’t tell them!

in order to improve your sex life with your partner, you are going to need to change your approach to sex before casting judgement on your partner and what you perceive as their failings.

is it even fair for you to look upon them in this way, when you should be looking at them with love, understanding, and kindness? when you should be making efforts to at least try to meet them halfway and figure out if they are also having issues with your sex life as it is?

to be blunt, my dear, it isn't all about you and it is unfair to place the pressure of your pleasure completely on your partner’s shoulders without even trying to communicate with them first. 

GROUP THREE

cards · the tower (reversed), king of pentacles, the devil, six of cups, ten of pentacles (reversed). moon totem – owl: a crisis will allow you to look into yourself and make an important revelation. moon phases – half to full moon: embracing high levels of motivation and energy will bring feelings of empowerment and satisfactions.

my dear group three ♡ you may have had somewhat of a bad sexual experience with your partner lately, maybe you were walked in on or disturbed or had your plans for sex disrupted by work or other obligations.

your life is so busy, which makes sex almost unenjoyable—especially for those of you with kids who, while you love your children, would like just an hour or two to enjoy time with your partner and experience the kind of intimacy that you two crave. even for those without children, you do not have the time you want to have to be with your partner in the way that you both want or need. rather, you do not make time for this.

it is so bad that even the idea of sex seems like a chore. you schedule that this thursday you and your partner will have sex, and you spend every day leading up to that day looking at the calendar and wondering if you’ll actually get to spend time together or if something will come up at the last minute. or if you’ll both be too drained and tired to even look at each other with any sexual desire. one way that you can improve your sex life with your partner is for the both of you to consciously decide to devote time to each other. not just an evening at home, in and out and roll over and go to sleep. something more like a weekend away would be more suited for the two of you in order to rekindle the spark that has been lost.

it doesn’t have to be expensive or extravagant or that far from home, just something that reminds you two that you are people with desires before you are partners or spouses. during this time, spoil each other and pay special attention to each other. 

because, my love, if you feel like this relationship is suffering and needs special attention, imagine how your partner feels… try to make this a habit. something you can look forward to not only to find healing as a couple but as individuals with busy lives!

GROUP FOUR

cards · nine of wands, eight of wands, six of cups, the devil, nine of pentacles. blue moon: now is a powerful time to set long-term goals and sow seeds for the future. moon totem – cat: make time to focus on your own spiritual wellbeing and connect to the metaphysical world around you.

my dear group four ♡ the simplest way for you to improve your sex life with your partner is to create a to-do list together of the things that you’re interested in and want to try together.

i actually see a powerpoint presentation, and envision you two having a presentation night, laughing as you describe in detail the things you’re interested in experimenting with or trying!

put together a plan for the next few weeks, months, or the year—maybe a collaborative list on google docs or notion which you both can freely edit whenever a thought pops into your mind—as it will give you both something to look forward to.

especially if you’re both fairly sexually inexperienced or are trying new things sexually, such as bdsm, and aren’t really sure about what you’re doing. 

sex doesn’t have to be daunting or methodical or boring! it can be fun, it should be fun, most of all when you’re sharing this beautiful experience with someone you love and care about and who loves and cares about you. 

creating a list or plan will make this more exciting for both of you—as well as will make you feel less overwhelmed by the idea of sex with your partner!

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𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙫𝙞𝙗𝙚𝙨 𝙥𝙖𝙘 🌠

🌠 ─── hello and welcome, today’s tarot reading will be a sort of vibe check, basically what vibes me and my cards are getting from you at the moment.

🌠 ─── picking your pile: take a deep breath and allow your soul to centre itself. when you feel your mind balanced and cleared, allow yourself to be drawn to an image. your eyes may gravitate to one, or you may close your eyes and feel which image is calling out.

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𝙥𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚 🌠

firstly, i'm getting pile one that you are in creative energy right now. you could be experiencing a bout of inspiration and expressing yourself creatively, such as with art, writing or music. it could also be creativity with problem solving or coming up with a project idea. but i'm sensing there is something playful and personal to you, whatever creative thing you are doing or are planning to do is something you will enjoy. perhaps it is something you did when you were younger. it's going to bring out your inner child, help you understand your deepest passions. it's very nostalgic.

for some of you, you may be spending too much time daydreaming. you have a vast imagination which is a wonderful thing but too much of your time is being spent on what if's and unrealistic desires, such as fantasising about your life as a celebrity when in real life you have homework due that you've not yet completed. like i said, it's great to have a wild and creative imagination, but this is your check in to get control of your mind because it's affecting your productivity and efficiency. you can be ambitious, but be practical also instead of doing things in your head but not in real life.

𝙥𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙬𝙤 🌠

for some of you who chose pile two, you may be feeling like your life is chaotic right now. i think for a number of you, not all of you, you may have experienced some conflict recently. perhaps an argument with a family member or falling out with a friend. because of this, you feel like your life is falling apart. for the most part, you guys are going through a strengthening experience. you're stronger than you've been before, and more confident. you may also be struggling to adapt to a new change in your life.

overall, there is shifting energy, like changes are happening in your life. they could be big or small but the majority of you will get through this quickly. even still, you're feeling quite balanced. some of you might be learning something also, or getting ready to learn, such as preparing for the new school year or investing in personal classes. you might be feeling restless, like in an excited way but still nervous for something new. but again, you're handling your anxiousness well. i'm getting calm and balanced energy, but for some of you, you need to get over this tower moment before you can find balance and clarity again.

𝙥𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙚𝙚 🌠

some of you are stuck in a shell, others are coming our of your shell. have you been feeling introverted lately? those kinds of moods where you don't want to leave your bedroom or home. you kind of just want to wallow in your own energy and avoid people and situations. i feel like most of you who chose this pile are homebodies anyway so you don't mind being stuck in this energy. but at the same time, you're looking forward to a positive energy shift. you're ready to finally leave your bedroom and see the sun. you're energy is being renewed, you're ready to let go of the loneliness and gloominess.

there is enlightening energy walking away from this isolation. i think some of you might be feeling disconnected from the world and from the people around you. maybe some of you got caught in this energy because of a breakup or a falling out. there is separation involved with some of you which has caused an imbalance in your life but you are slowly finding that balance again and putting effort into making things up to yourself. i don't feel this energy is too depressing, or too sad. however, it's definitely lonely and the decision to escape isolation is in your hands. make those plans you've been thinking about all week. focus on those projects that have been begging for your attention. it takes one small step start the shift in energy.

𝙥𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙪𝙧 🌠

are you preparing for something right now, pile four? quite ambitious about something, you're excited for it. i feel like it's taking up your mind for most of the day. you've been looking forward to this. i think for some you're feeling quite practical and productive. i'm getting starting a new job or starting the new school year vibes. you've been looking forward to it. you feel confident. you have in your mind the exact type of person you want to be. you're excited to learn new skills and accomplish what you've been wanting. but you may be having issues with concentration.

for some, i think you have an exam or a project due but you've been neglecting it and it is making you feel frustrated. it's immature on your part. you've also been very materialistic lately, like you want to buy the new trendy thing you saw on the internet or you want to buy a new tech product like a phone or a laptop. you're having thoughts that you won't be happy until you own that thing but the problem is that materialism is like an addiction. you can't keep buying new things that aren't worth the money, it will hold you back. start asking yourself if you really need these things or if you need to start controlling your urges and take time off from the internet.

𝙥𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙫𝙚 🌠

pile five, i think you are feeling quite stubborn art the moment. are you refusing to apologise for something? do you feel like others are ganging up on you? you're very determined but you are experiencing energy that is overbearing. it could be you're attitude to others, or others attitude towards you, or even your attitude to yourself. you want to get away from it all. you're feeling quite detached, however you are also feeling great awareness. you understand that with freedom comes vulnerability, but still, you're willing to make sacrifices as long as you can get away.

the energy and thoughts you are having are very much a double edged sword. for example, you're thinking of doing something which will benefit yourself but at the cost of those around you. be mindful of your ambitions because they can be damaging to yourself also. there is a hint of betrayal here, it's not for all of you. are you feeling defeated? do you feel like you're being forced to surrender? it's quite heavy energy, i think you're really going through it, pile five. but my message to you is to not stop planning for your future. despite all that is holding you back, you need a plan for if you ever decide to make the move to get away from it all. things will brighten up eventually.

𝙥𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙨𝙞𝙭 🌠

i think some of you are entering a celebratory period. it doesn't need to be for you necessarily, perhaps you are celebrating for someone else's occasion. but i think those who chose pile six are in a mood to be social and meet with friends and family, maybe dance to music and so on. some of you might be feeling weary of others' intentions. perhaps you don't feel comfortable with the way someone is treating you or you're getting a weird vibe from someone. you shouldn't doubt your intuition but at the same time, don't let it hold you back. go forth and meet with your people, celebrate whatever it is knowing that if anyone tries to hurt you, it's a reflection of their own insecurities, not yours.

as much as you want to, don't go picking for drama or calling people out. remain comfortable in your own wise energy and focus on the positivity in your life and of those around you. that is what will make them shut up, because they know their negativity or toxicity can't affect you. you have dreams and you want to reach them, so go for it. don't let anyone hold you back. let things remain a mystery. you don't need to know every single thing. i'm feeling that you want to be a high energy/high vibe person but you're not cutting out the things and people that lower your vibe. you're feeling afraid but just remember, you'll have so much more to celebrate when you do.

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pac/pap: how can you be more honest with yourself?

take what resonates leave what doesn't - nothing is 100% for you because these aren't personalized so please no angry comments or dms about what i am saying not being a good fit for you or that you "don't claim" just keep scrolling if that is the case. be kind, self reflect, and have fun.

last pac/pap: what bad habit(s) are you struggling with? what happens when you drop your bad habit(s)? what to keep in mind as you break your bad habit(s)?

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pile one

it is past time for you to be extremely honest with yourself. you need to sit down and take an honest look at your situation and where you wish to be/go in life. make a list of your toxic/unhealthy thoughts, habits, and coping mechanisms. it's time to do some shadow work on why these traits, ideas, and habits are getting in the way of you living your best life. you have to ask yourself and answer these questions honestly: if it feels good in the moment, why do you feel bad/negatively after? if it is the poison, how can it also be the cure?

pile two

i feel freudian right now... how are things with your parents? i feel like some connection (or lack of one) with one of your parents is bothering right know. did something big just happen for you? did you want to share it with them, but you stopped yourself from doing so? it's time to ask yourself what is it that is truly stopping you from reaching out? are you punishing them, or are you punishing yourself? you need to take better care of yourself mentally and physically - focus on wellness and spend some time outside. care for your environment, so your external and internal self feels better. why do you believe you deserve your current situation and environment anyway?

pile three

opportunities are all around you - why aren't you taking them? i feel like you are stewing. you are in this mindset of thinking you don't have what it takes to do what you want or find what you want. that just is not true - you are in your own way, but why is that? why aren't you taking action on your goals and dreams? is it because you fear failure or is it because you fear reward (as weird as that my sound)? stay open and put yourself out there - why can't you trust that the divine is on your side and has great things in store for you?