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I need more

Teach me ~ Noah Sebastian (pt.1)

Pairing: Best friend Noah! x Virgin! Reader

Content: Unestablished relationship, cheating, Friends to lovers, Friends with Benefits, Loss of Virginity

Content warning: Cheating, Toxic relationship,Smut, loss of virginity (not in this part yet), make out sessions, mentions of loss of virginity

Series Summary: Reader is reaching a point in her relationship where sex is coming up in conversation. Reader is an inexperienced virgin. Who better to show her than her best friend Noah?

A/N: possible series? This is my first time writing but I’ve been reading fan fiction my whole life. If any of these topics make you uncomfortable this may not be the content you want to read. Noah is a gem and I hope he’d never find this anywhere( I doubt he would💀). Please enjoy any questions or comments about the series feel free to confess your sins to me in my bio ✨

You’re not really sure what started your make out session and what ended it. All you know is you had to stop before you regretted something later. You just established a new relationship with a guy named Jake. You’ve been eyeing Jake down for a while now since you’ve moved to California. You are a model and merch girl for bad omens. You’re also best friends with their lead singer Noah Sebastian.

Jake’s lips were sucking all over your neck. You tilt your head back and groan at the feeling. You’re a virgin no one has ever been this intimate with you like this. You always thought of giving your virginity to your best friend. You trust him with your life and insecurities. So why are you in the situation you’re in now?

You pulled back from Jake. “Hey what’s the matter? I thought we were just getting started?” His fingers trace the underwire of your bra and pulled you back towards him, moving his hips into yours.

“I don’t know, I’m not feeling the greatest right now..” You pulled back away again, standing up from him ready to put your sweater back on.

“I’m sorry Jake, I think my period is about to start, my body is just hurting and it’s making me feel all weird.” You use that excuse to get you out of this awkward situation. Truth is whether it was something in the air or him, it didn’t feel right.

“You never mentioned you were on your period, it’s fine though we can still… you know…”

Even though you knew what he was implying, you used your innocence as an advantage and act like you didn’t know what he was referring to.

You stare back at him giving him a questioning look like you didn’t understand.

“You know what nevermind, you should probably go take care of yourself, you got to go to work anyway right?” He speaks as he exhales in defeat.

“Yea what time is it?” You look around the couch for your phone.

“Just past 9.”

“Yea I should probably go.” You give him a smile and find your phone off the couch putting your sweater back on as well.

You’ve been with him for 5 months and the topic of sex has been in the air. Not to mention but you still haven’t told him you’re a virgin and you’re scared he’d push you even further or make fun of you.

The awkward silence lingers while putting your shoes back on. He walks you out to his door and lets you out still shirtless from your session, he smiles back at you before he closed the door.

You make your way to your car and drive back to the shared house you live in with the guys. Noah being your best friend was nice enough to have you room in with him and the guys. He enjoys your company and how you keep the house clean and uptight.

Walking through the door the house is a little empty. There’s a unsatisfied feeling in your stomach that still hasn’t gone away as you enter the house. “Hey I’m home.” You yelled through the house. Not expecting anyone to come out and respond. Noah emerges from his room, making you jump since you thought you were alone.

“Sorry to scare you, you doing okay?” Noah chuckles and leans against his doorframe.

“Yea, Jake is just being a little pushy is all. He’s upset I won’t let him in my pants.” You shrug, making your way into the kitchen.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to with him you know that right? He needs to respect you and your boundaries.” Noah comes towards you leaning against the wall, waiting for a response.

“He does Noah, I want to mess around with him too, it’s just that…” you pause realizing not even Noah knows you’re inexperienced, wondering if he knew.

“Just that…” Noah picks up where you stopped and questions your voice and your unsure reaction.

“Don’t make fun of me..” You mumble looking anywhere but at him.

“Why would I make fun of you?”

“I don’t know…” you look back at him.

Noah was intimidating but he wasn’t a scary person. In fact he was one of the nicest people you know. His eyes are so kind when looking at you, you know he’d never hurt you.

“You know Jake…” you started pacing around the kitchen and him while talking to try and keep your anxiety down.

“Mhmm..” Noah’s eyes follow you around while you walk and rumble on.

“I don’t know how say any of this..” you mutter.

“Just talk and I’ll listen.”

“Well we’ve been together for a little bit now, like 5 months and he’s wanting to go further with everything. Kissing, touching, all of that.

“But…” you stop. “But.. what?” Noah follows you with his eyes.

“I’m a virgin.” You stare up at him wishing the ground would swallow you whole. The silence from your words radiates in the room. “Please don’t think I’m some kinda of whore to ask for your help, I don’t know who else to go to..” your eyes stared down at the ground now.

Noah’s eyebrows quirk, not in annoyance or offense, but in confusion to your words.

“I know you’ve had experience with girls, relationships, I know some of them didn’t work… I’m sorry to bring this onto you and all..” you mumble.

Noah’s eyes connect to your figure as you stare down at the floor. He relaxes his face, noticing your anxious eyes and body language like you were scared he’d tell you to get out or something.

You wrap your arms around yourself, still staring at the ground waiting for his words.

“What are you saying exactly…” Noah’s voice calm. He knows what you might ask but refuses to ask for himself, and would rather wait for you to speak.

You groan internally, not wanting to say it but forcing yourself to. He comes closer to you, standing in front of you now. You give out a big sigh before finally opening up.

“Can you teach me how to fuck someone?” You look up at him waiting for him to laugh at you.

Noah can feel his chest pounding at your question but is okay with it for a few reasons. One, you’re essentially giving him your virginity to toy around with and he’s letting you. He’s more than flattered. Second, because you were a virgin. It’s something he would never question you about, and didn’t expect coming from you.

“Sure, I’ll teach you.” Noah looked back at you. “On one condition, we cannot catch feelings for eachother.” You nod agreeing with his conditions. He flashed, gentle reassuring smile and walks over to the couch.

“Come here.” Noah nods, for you to come to him and sit by him.

“What’s the furthest you’ve gone?” Noah waits for your response. Leaning forward with his hands in his lap.

“Um… you look at his hands while you stand in front of him. “Kissing.” You mutter.

Noah feels his stomach turn. Giving him a deep and uncomfortable feeling. You were pure, and almost completely untouched. Your body missing the feeling of knowing any pleasure. It made his chest feel tight.

“Shit.” He chuckles, leaning back against the couch. You don’t know what came over you but you felt the need to climb up into his lap, wanting his comfort.

His hands met your hips stilling you in him.

“When is the next time you see him?” He questioned. “Tomorrow..” you mumble.

“You confident in kissing?..” Noah stared at your eyes looking for any signs of you being uncomfortable.

You nod your head afraid to speak. “Show me.”

“What?” You paused eyes going wide. You know you signed up to get lessons but you didn’t think you’d have to show him the results.

“Use the back of my hand.” He raised his tattooed hand to you. “Easy.”

Noah thought about letting you kiss him. It would be the easiest and realest way for him to help you, he could feel what Jake would feel, and what he would think.

“No!” You closed your eyes. “It’s - it’s so embarrassing.”

“Listen to me you need to corporate if we’re going to get anywhere.” He huffs, leans back again and rolls his eyes.

“I didn’t think I was gonna be making out with a hand!” You stare back at him.

“Well, you thought wrong this is how I use to practice, and I’m a good kisser, now it’s your turn.” He adds.

You scoff looking down at his hand, then back him hesitantly.

“Are you serious?”

“Yes.”

You cringe. Taking his hand and slowly bringing toward your mouth. You felt humiliated trying to ignore the heat creeping up on your cheeks and chest. As your embarrassment grows. You pause just as his hand comes to your mouth.

“I’m not doing this.” Your tone is defensive as you drop his hand into your lap.

Noah groans. He looks up at you in your eyes. “Do you trust me?” Noah asks.

“Yea..” you mumble confused as to what he means.

The thought of kissing you has been radiating in his head. He wastes no time grabbing to back of your neck and smashing your lips to his.

You let out a noise in protest like you couldn’t believe what he just did. Pushing on his chest to pull you off his mouth.

“Noah!” You shout, jumping up off him from the couch. You felt dizzy like he poisoned you with his kiss.

“Sit down, I just kissed you.”

“I have - I’m in… Noah!” You stutter. Not able to form real words.

“I’m trying to help you, and you won’t kiss my hand so kissing me was the only other option.” He reaches out bringing you back into his lap. “This is nothing more than kissing, it means nothing.”

You look over at him as he’s laying back in the couch relaxing everything about do this with him makes sense. The feelings you’re feeling, the kissing, the reassuring, it all makes sense with Noah.

Slowly you move yourself closer to him into his lap. Still nervous you bring your arms around his neck looking at his face.

“I’ll never force you to do anything you don’t want to do, but know this is one of the only ways I can help you.” He moves closer to you, just inches apart from you and him. He was close to you you could feel his body heat radiating onto you

“Okay.” You whispered. Taking a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves, and looking in his eyes.

“I’m going kiss you now, okay?” He says. Gently squeezing your side as he leans up to you places his lips on yours.

His hands travel up from your sides to the sides of your face gently holding your face in his hands as his lips move against yours.

His knee slips between your legs making the feeling overwhelming. You pull away still inches apart from Noah. His pretty dark eyes staring back at yours, Making you feel self conscious.

Your foreheads resting against each other’s while you try and slow your breathing.

He takes a deep breath and leans back into you. Noses touching and lips hovering over yours. You could feel your heart going erratic in your rib cage.

Then, his lips are on yours again. Soft and gentle, unmoving against yours. You drop your hands to your shirt and start digging your fingernails into its fabric.

His hands warm still cupping your face… thankfully his hands around your face were keeping you still or you’d be moving all over the place.

“You still doing okay?” He mumbles, his eyes closed, with his nose resting against yours as you nod your head.

“Good, you need to relax some, you’re very stiff in my hands.” He chuckles.

Not giving you a chance to respond he moves his lips back on yours. You tried to listen to him and relax your body against his but it was hard with his tongue was sliding against your lips.

The little gasp you made, making it easy for him to slip his tongue in no problem. Your hands moved from your shirt to the material of his shorts against his thighs.

You were sucking in shaky breaths through your nose, as his tongue made it to yours. It was almost too much, it felt so different from how Jake kissed you. Noah kissed you like there’s no time in the world, while Jake kisses you like he has somewhere else to be.

“Are you always this nervous?” Noah says out of breathe.

“I- um, yeah.” You gave a nervous laugh, refusing to look at his face. Freeing your hands from the grip on his shorts.

“I have an idea.” You eyes meet his again. “Why don’t you kiss me like I’m him.” That way it’s easier for you to get comfortable.” He says.

“Do you trust me?” Noah’s thumb rubs your cheek looking at your eyes. “Yes.” You mumble.

“C’mon” he jerks you up towards his lap more. So close to him, you were practically sitting right on his waist.

“Noah..” you whispered. Refusing to look into his eyes.

“Kiss me like you kiss him.”

“But you’re my friend…”

“Yeah, and you need my help. This is me helping you.”

“Okay,” you mumble.

You bring yours lips to his. He starts kissing you harder, causing both of you to groan into the kiss. You let his tongue slip into your mouth. His hands push your waist into him more as he tongue dances with yours. You try and match his lip movements. His tongue was gentle and sensual against yours as if he was trying to get a flavor of how you’d taste.

You try not to focus on the fact you’re sitting on his waist. The most intimate parts of each other. But the way he’s kissing you has you grinding against him.

You want and need to feel him hard and throbbing beneath you.

You feel dirty. Like you shouldn’t be doing this with your best friend. You should be doing this with Jake, learning with Jake.

But with Noah it felt so good and so bad that it was right.

Noah takes your bottom lip into his teeth biting it gently. Then he puts his mouth on yours again. You grab some of his shirt tugging him closer to you.

His grip on your waist grows tighter. Your hips fall into his grasp. As they do he pulls you closer to him. Practically grinding on him. When you sit back you feel him. Hard and poking at your ass.

Noah groans, as he lays back. He needs more. More from you. His hands guide your hips to grind against him again slowly and deeply.

“Noah..” you breathe. Not sure if you begging for him or pleading for him to stop.

Noah feels himself twitch. He feels your heat from above him. He wonders if Jake ever made you feel like this. Or if he ever will.

You continue grinding against him. He knew the both do you were getting carried away and needed to stop before it became too much (for him at least).

“Shit, you gotta stop.” His hands coming to your hands stopping you in place. The way you kept moving yours hips on his made him dizzy. Almost like he couldn’t handle it.

He lifts you off his waist. And sets you on the spot by him on the couch. You sit there shocked and out of breath still panting.

“Was that alright?” You pant grabbing onto the side of the couch, staring at the floor dazed.

Noah Blinks a few times. Hands coming over his face while he’s still sitting back in the couch.

“Yeah, you did great, that was great. You’re great.” Noah says with hands still over his eyes panting as well.

You gave him a smile and walked out of the living room to the kitchen. You hear the rest of guys come into the house asking Noah if he’s okay and what not.

There’s still a pit of the unsatisfied feeling in your stomach. Your skin and everything still feels on fire, and your lips feel bruised.

You closed your door leaning against it smiling. You didn’t learn much more but you feel confident in kissing Jake now.

Damn!! 🥵🥴

Teach me ~ Noah Sebastian (pt 2)

Pairing: Best friend Noah! x Virgin! Reader

Content: Unestablished relationship, cheating, Friends to lovers, Friends with Benefits, Loss of virginity

Content warning: cheating, toxic relationship, smut, loss of virginity (not this chapter), make out sessions, fingering, oral sex (female receiving)

Series summary: Reader is reaching a point in her life where sex is coming into the conversation. Reader is an inexperienced virgin. Who better to teach her than her best friend Noah?

A/N: hey y’all thanks for the love on chapter one. I was very nervous to start writing this type of stuff. I hope it’s enjoyable to some. If any of these chapters or topics make you uncomfortable this might not be the content you would like to read. I respect Noah, and I respect bad omens. This is all fictional and not real. This is for fun. We have fun on this app. Please enjoy the series, any questions, suggestions, or concerns shoot me a message in my bio.🩶🫶🏻 as always enjoy🤭

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

The alarm screams through the air. You wake up stretching in your bed trying to remember what happened last night. Suddenly everything rushes back to you.

Noah and you made out on the couch, and grinded on each other.

You made him hard. You might’ve cheated on Jake in a sense. You shiver at the thought of your relationship and what it’s come to. You pull yourself out of bed and head to the shower.

You set the shower up and run the water waiting for it to get warm for you to jump in. As you hop in and wet your hair while running your hands through it, you think about what you got to do today with the band.

You have a merch shoot you guys have to do. They’re dropping merch this weekend, meaning they need you to help model. You always want to help with anything band related. However after the events of last night you feel a little dirty still of what you’ve done with Noah on the couch.

Noah didn’t have sex with you. He didn’t put anything inside you, well his tongue in your mouth, but it wasn’t anything too sexual.

You blink at your thoughts of him doing certain things to you. Trying to get your mind to focus on Jake. Your relationship and hopefully the love of your life.

You finished up in the shower before hoping out and putting a towel around you and your head. You walk out into your room and put on the outfit you have set out the night before. Brushing your hair you hear a knock at your door.

You yell back “Come in!” As you brush your hair getting ready to dry it.

Matt opens the door to your room, sticking his head in.

“Hey just a reminder we got that merch shoot today, just wanted to give you a heads up to get ready but, looks like you already beat me to it.” Matt chuckles.

“Yep, I got it. Thanks for the reminder though.” You turn your hair dryer on, drying your hair to style it.

Matt closed your door and you get yourself ready to head out for the day. You walked out of your room and was greeted by Jolly in kitchen with the other guys at the table.

“Hey we made breakfast if you’re hungry. I got avocado toast.” He hands you the food on the plate and urges you to sit down and eat.

You thanked him and took a seat next to Noah at the table. “Hey how did you sleep?” You start. He looks up at you mouth full of food. He swallows and stares down at the table.

“Fine. Took a cold shower to get my mind off things.” He takes another bite of food. “Song writing stressing you out?” You question.

“No not exactly. Songs are coming together well, and everything is going as it should with the album.” He mumbles.

“Oh, well hopefully you can blow off some steam here with the upcoming merch shoot.” You sip the orange juice that was placed in front of you by Jolly.

“We’ll see.” Noah’s jaw clenches, as he gets up from the table and walks back into his room. Wonder what’s got him worked up? You thought.

Truth was Noah was getting frustrated because he didn’t want to get feelings from the lessons he’s teaching you. He is finding it hard to let another guy take advantage of you and your innocence. Part of him wants it to be him to teach you, to love you, to cum for.

You finished breakfast, and Matt gets all of you out the house down to shoot for the merch. Everyone took turns modeling different things.

You modeled their t-shirt that stopped at the top of your thighs. Covering your shorts and your ass. Noah wondered what one of his t-shirts would look like on you, and how long it would be on you. He grew hard at the thought.

~ *fast forward to the end of the shoot* ~

“Good job guys! These look great!” Bryan smiled looking at the photos of his camera. “Especially you, y/n.. these fans are gonna be jealous of you.” He laughs. You smile and thank him, heading back to your car to head to Jake’s house.

You watch a large figure appear at your window. Looking up you see Noah wave at you. You rolled your window down to him. “Hey, what’s up?” You question.

“Hey.. be careful, let me know how it goes with him. I know you’ll do great.” He gives you a fake smile as if he wanted nothing more than to take you out of the car and keep you all to himself.

“Yea, of course. I’ll see you later tonight.” You rolled the window up and drive your way to Jake’s apartment. You go and ring the doorbell and he welcomes you in.

“Hey how did work go..” he questions. “Good it was good, had a long day modeling.” You tell him smiling. Jake didn’t know you modeled for a band’s merch. You told him you modeled clothes for a company and he thinks it’s Victoria’s Secret and you let him think that.

“Should show me the photos when they get them edited and updated for whatever sale they got.” He laughs sitting down his couch patting the spot by him.

You slip off your shoes and shrug making your way to the couch. “Sure, I’ll have them send them over to you if they end up using them. They have so many models they barely put me out on their photos.”

Lies.

You just didn’t want to tell him you work with a bunch of guys. You feared he’d make you quit and you wanted nothing more than to be with him and to make him happy.

Jake makes music as well. Well, not music that’s famous. He’s made you listen to a few of his songs off his SoundCloud. They are pretty okay, though when it came to vocals, Noah absolutely outperformed him.

Jake leaned back in couch. The tv was playing some show that you’d didn’t recognize. You barely watched tv, let alone Netflix. You’d rather listen to whatever Noah and the guys were producing than watch a sitcom.

You sit by him. He starts leaning into the couch as a sign to climb onto his lap. He chuckles and pulls you closer to him. “I see what your intentions are, and I don’t wanna stop.” You shiver at his words. You know Jake wouldn’t pressure you into anything at least you think.

You start out kissing each other. Everything starts moving fast. Faster than you want it to. It’s almost overwhelming, his words at not wanting to stop, are echoing in your brain, making you feel a certain ick.

You pull away from his lips. He smiles and starts pushing his hips to yours. You match his pace and he moves you harder against him. You’re enjoying it and so is he. He takes off his shirt and so do you, leaving you in your bra.

He starts by kissing your lips again, and makes his way down your neck. He’s not as soft and gentle as Noah is almost seems like he’s in a rush to getting your clothes off. It was pissing you off.

He pulls you closer to him. Hard and rough grip on your back and waist. He could crush you if he wanted to.

He keeps moving your hips with his while grinding with you. He goes to unbutton your shorts, and you immediately pull away.

“Jake..” it was like he almost knew you were going stop him. He plays with the loops on your jean shorts, and waits for you to continue.

“Um.. I’ve never had someone go down on me before..” you mumble closing your eyes.

“Never?”

“N-No..”

“Do you mind if I do.”

You squirm at the thought of him having his tongue on you and in you in your most intimate place. You pull back standing up from him.

“Yea, I j-just..” you look around to find your shirt throwing it back on.

“I’m not sure yet.”

Jake stands up from the couch, gripping onto your arm as if he wanted to pull you back down to him. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion and annoyance.

,

Trying to pull you to him. “C’mon, I’ll be gentle.” He says trying to egg you on to let him do it.

You tug your arm harder away from him. He finally lets your arm go, after some resistance from him gripping it tightly.

“No, I don’t.. think I want to — not yet at least.” You mumble taking a few steps back from him. Feeling the tension in the air between the two of you grow awkward and weird.

“You’ll like it.” He steps forward to you. Keeping his hands to himself but his eyes all over you.

“Jake, no.” You say, forcing yourself to speak in a harsher tone to make your point across to him. You shake your head as well. “Just.. no.”

He lets out a huff in defeat and sits back down on the couch, while you stand there, wondering if you should stay or go after the awkward situation.

“Sorry.” He mumbles, hands going over his face to hide the embarrassment growing on it.

“I’m just not comfortable with that yet.” You stare into the floor. He freaked you out for a minute wondering if he would’ve stopped.

But you know Jake would never hurt you.

At least you think he wouldn’t. He might have to power to. But you know he’d never have the power to.

You left Jake’s around the normal time. Past 9, and make your way back to the guys. Your nerves are still shot from the encounter you had with Jake.

You know Noah will be asking about it, and you’re not really sure what you should and should not tell him. Maybe you’re overthinking and overreacting what Jake was wanting to do. Maybe you should have just let him do it. You sigh, and put the car in drive and head back home.

*time fast forwards to back home*

Walking into the kitchen to get a late night glass of water, the time on the stove read “12:30”. You sigh and grab a cup from the cupboard. Everyone is sleeping. You came back and fell asleep for a few hours.

You didn’t fall asleep yet before taking a shower, to get the feeling of Jake’s lips and hands off of you. Something about him today really made you grow annoyed with him. You sit on the counter and stare at the floor.

A door opens and closes. Noah comes out of his room and finds you sitting there in the dimly light kitchen, making his way over to you. “Hey” he whispers to you walking over, he stands in front of you. His eyes seeing the discomfort in your face.

“So.. you going tell me what happened? You came in and went straight into your room without a word.” He leans against the island across from you in kitchen waiting for a response.

“I made out with him… and um he wanted to go down on me, but I stopped him.” You mumble. Still staring into the floor. Noah watches your face as your eyebrows furrowed in frustration from remembering the situation.

“I didn’t think he’d stop at one point.. he kept trying to get me to let him do it over and over, after telling him many times no.” At one point he wouldn’t even let me go.” You cringe.

Noah’s body tenses, anger creeps up on his neck at the thought of him not stopping when you want to.

Tears of frustration and anger come to your eyes. “I should’ve just let him.” This stupid virgin shit is getting on my nerves, getting in the way of everything..” you sob.

Noah’s quick to come to your aide. He stands in front of you moving your face to his chest to comfort you. He lets you cry and get your emotions out, quietly cooing you.

“Come with me, we’ll go relax in my room.” He lifts you up carrying you into his room. You places you on his bed, you lay down on it exhausted. Noah sits in his chair by his computer in his room.

You inhale the smell of Noah and his cologne that is in his sheets. The smell is nice and comforting. You lay there for a few minutes and take some breathes to calm yourself.

You pause your thoughts, as another one comes in that makes you nervous but sure you’d be comfortable with.

“Hey.. N-Noah..” you sit up, and his head turns it yours

He nods, waiting for you to speak. You start to play with your fingers out of an anxious habit. “D-Do you think you can go down on me.. just to see what’s it’s like?” You mumble.

Noah pauses his game, completely turning towards shocked at your words, but happy at your need to come to him. He thinks about the thought of you spread out and exposed to. His dick twitch at the thought.

“Do you know you like?” Noah’s voice lower than normal.

“What do you mean?…” you give him a questioning look. He stares back at you.. “have you never touched yourself?” He asks in disbelief. “N-No.. I haven’t really tried..” you mumble staring at his wall to avoid his eyes.

“Do you want to try to do that?” Noah asks.

Your eyes go wide at his question. “With you?!”

You feel your heart start to race at the idea now realizing you asked Noah to eat you out and now he’s asking about fingering you as well.

“I won’t do it if you don’t want me to.. if you want to go try it out yourself go right ahead. My room is right here, come in whenever you need anything.” He smiles at you.

“If you have any questions or problems shoot me a text or anything.” Noah believes this was a private thing for you to do to yourself. He didn’t want to invade and invite himself to help you unless you asked him. He’d do anything for you regardless, but he didn’t want to try anything until you were sure what you liked and what you didn’t like.

“Okay, I’ll let you know if I need any help.” You get up and make your way into your room closing the door behind you.

*few hours pass*

“Goddamnit!” You groan out of frustration. Taking your hand out of your shorts. “Nothing is fuckin working…” I’ve tried everything..” tears forming in the corners of your eyes.

Rolling over in bed you read the clock on your night stand

“3:00am”

“Fuck..” you mumble. Throwing your head back to your pillow. He’s definitely not up, you thought to yourself. I can just lie to him and tell him I got off. Definitely can.

“Hey.. you still up?”

Your phone vibrates seeing the contact is Noah. Panic washes over your body as you realize he indeed is still up.

“Yea, everything is going okay.” You text back.

“Just..okay?” He replies, questioning your response in his text.

You decided not to text him back. Maybe he would think you’re sleeping. You groan squeezing your thighs together at the dull ache still there between your legs.

He can definitely help, and make it disappear you thought. Then I won’t have to worry about any of this and can continue all this stuff with Jake. You nod your head agreeing with your thoughts.

“Actually.. do you think you can help?” You text back. Shaken hands as you waiting for a reply. Except there isn’t one. Just a quiet knock at your door.

“Y/N…” Noah whispers at the door, before coming in quietly. He sees you spread out on your bed, hair is messy, and shirt exposing your tummy. He feels his dick twitch, as he sits on the edge of your bed.

“Noah, I’ve tried everything nothing is working, I know what I like but I just can’t get myself off. I need help, I need your help.” You plead, tears rolling down your face as embarrassment creeps up on your cheeks as well.

Noah shushes you, giving you a kiss to your head. He gets off your bed looking around your room. He looks around and spots a mirror. He grabs it placing it up at the end of the bed holding the back of it with a chair. It stands up at you guys at the end of your bed.

He settles back in your bed, in front of the mirror.

“Come here.” He commands, opening his legs to make room for you to sit between them. “Noah… what are we doing..” you say hesitatingly. You make your way between his legs, he moves both your legs over yours exposing you with your shorts.

“Show me.” He whispers in your ear, nibbling the bottom of it. “I’m going watch from the mirror and correct you if you seem to be doing anything wrong.” He whispers lowly.

You nod, taking your hand into your shorts, groaning at the feeling of contact again. You circle your clit for a few minutes before your legs start to moving to close. Noah stops them from closing with his hands on your thighs. “Keep going..” he says. You move your fingers harsher on your clit, not enough to make it any better but you apply more pressure.

“I c-can’t..” you moan. Noah takes it upon himself to take your hand out of your shorts. His dick is so hard it’s throbbing. “Take off your shorts..” he looks at you through the mirror. “I-I.. idk” you mumble becoming defensive shaking your head.

“Do you trust me?” Noah turns your head to look at you.

“Yes.” You say. “If you want my help.. you have to trust me… you know I’d never make fun of you, I promise.” He holds up his pinky.

You hold yours up connecting it to his. You move to slide your shorts down, feeling the cold air connect with your skin. Leaving you in just your underwear.

“D-Do I have to..” unsure if they need to come off too, Noah stops you. “Not unless you want to, I can always work around them.” He flashes you a gentle smile in the mirror.

“Leave them on for now..” you breathe. Noah nods.

“Before I start, I need your consent… I need to hear it before I do any of this to you.” He turns his head at you with a serious look on his face. You nod your head at him.

“No, I need words.. it’s yes or no.” He says.

“Yes, Noah please touch me.” You plead.

He moves his fingers to your covered clit and starts moving circles on it. You throw your head back against his shoulder moaning. His fingers feel so good against you. They’re rough and harder than yours, they just feel so right.

Noah speeds up his fingers against your clit, your hips start moving against his wiggling in protest. “Noah, something feels weird.. I don’t know what’s happening..”

“Just let it go..” he whispers in your ear watch you cum for him.

You come down from your high seeing stars. Even after the intense orgasm, you still feel hot and bothered. Your mind starts moving like crazy. “Noah just made me cum. Noah made me cum?” You question to yourself. So that’s what it feels like you thought, it feels so good.

You turn your head to the mirror watching his dark eyes still on you. “N-Noah..” you whine still needy. “Yes?..” he answers, still looking at you. “Will you go down on me?” Your face on fire from the question.

“Yes.” He gets up moving down towards you. Both of you were so fucked out of your minds you couldn’t care about anyone or anything else.

Noah stands up and takes off his shirt. He lays up between your legs. Tattooed finger coming at the waist band of your underwear. He looks up at you before doing anything at all. He’s waiting for you to tell him he can remove them and dive in.

You look down at him resting on your elbows. You’re chewing your inner cheek, nerves creeping up your spine. “What if he doesn’t think I’m pretty?” “What if he finds me ugly?” You cringe at your thoughts. Your thoughts keep racing until a hand on your stomach cuts you off.

“Y/N, I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere, I promise I will never make fun of you for the way you sound or the way you look...” Noah’s tone calm, eyes calmly looking into yours looking for any hint of discomfort.

“If you want to stop tell me, and we’ll stop. Won’t ask any questions.” He says.

The care he has for you, never goes unseen. You swear he’d walk through fire and hell for you, to make you are happy. He’s the type of friend who would make sure you’d have everything you need before he does.

“Okay…” You breathe, “You can take them off..” you close your eyes trying to slow your breathing, as it picked up rapidly.

Noah’s hands don’t move. In fact he’s breathing hard as well. Waiting for you to open your eyes. You grow impatient waiting for him to do something. Your hands make your way to your underwear ready to pull them off yourself. His hands stop you doing so, and he places them up on your chest, shaking his head.

He moves your t-shirt up a little exposing your stomach. Then what you didn’t expect… his teeth bite at the fabric of your underwear pull them down with his teeth. Your air gets caught in your throat at the gesture.

Your face grows hot. You’re exposed to him. All out and open. You cover your face with your hands feeling embarrassment. Noah ignores your embarrassment, and moves his hands up from your ankle to your inner thigh. Slowly pulling your legs open to see you.

Your breath hitches as his hands come close to you, but jump to the top of your other inner thigh, down to your ankle.

He’s fuckin teasing you.

You groan out in frustration and he cooes, voice breaking the silence. “I know.. I gotta hear you say it though.” He looks up at you, hands still over your face. “Look at me.” He commands. You slowly take your hands off your face.

“You gotta tell me what you want…I need to hear it.” Noah says looking directly at your eyes, with him eye leveled to your pussy.

“That’s embarrassing…” you whine. He looks away from you.. still waiting. He continues to tease you moving his hands all over you slowly but, avoiding your heat. You couldn’t take it anymore and finally swallow down the courage to tell him.

“P-Please touch me Noah..” you stutter out. Your pussy aching and throbbing for him. “Do you want me to touch you or do you want me to eat you?” His eyes find yours again, waiting for your answer.

Your mind was so foggy you couldn’t care which one he would do anymore. “Both.” You pant “Please touch me and eat me.. I can’t take it anymore.” You cry, frustrated from the throbbing.

“As you wish.” Noah gently smiles. His tattooed finger come in contact with you slit, feeling how hot a sticking you are for him. “You’re so wet.” He groans, his breathing becoming heavier at the sight of you.

You clamp your legs around his shoulders trapping his head. Noah puts more pressure on your clit and starts rubbing it harsher. You bite your lip to maintain your moans from getting louder.

Suddenly you feel something protrude at your entrance, feeling it slowly slide in. His finger starts moving in and out of you. You moaned in satisfaction.

“You’re so tight..” he mumbles.

He pumps his finger in and out do you for a bit before adding a second one.

He adds a second one and starts to spread them apart making scissors in you. He stretches you out a bit, and you couldn’t hold back your moans as they start to slip pass your bitten lip.

He curls his fingers in you hitting that sweet spot. You grow really close, legs start shaking as you can barely hold on to your orgasm.

Suddenly all the you felt empty. Whining at the sudden loss of contact, you feel your legs being spread wider… Noah takes his fingers opening your folds apart making way for his tongue to enter you.

Knowing you wouldn’t be quiet during this, you take your shirt and put it between your teeth. Thank god most of the guys are sleeping anyway.

Noah started licking your cunt more. Your hands went to his hair. Pulling and tugging every time he’d suck on your clit. He switched from licking your cunt to sucking hard on your clit.

You feel like you’re floating. The feeling is so intense you feel like you could pass out from the pleasure. Noah starts moaning against your cunt as well, adding vibration.

“Oh my god.” You whine, unable to finish your sentence or form any other words. Back arching from the sensation.

Noah couldn’t care less if you were screaming your lungs out to the whole house, or pulling out all his hair while crushing him with your thighs. All he cared about was making you feel good, and making you cum on his tongue.

Noah adds his fingers into your cunt pumping them in and out a at a fast pace. He latches his mouth back on your clit, other hand anchoring your hips down as you arched.

“N-Noah, I’m close… don’t stop please..please don’t…” you words coming out in pants. Noah doesn’t let down he keeps going, fingers finding your spot making you completely squirt all over his chin and chest.

Coming down from your high in pants you see Noah smiling all wet around his face and chest.

“Oh my god, I peed on you.” You pull your legs up to your chest in disgust and embarrassment.

“No, you did not…” Noah chuckles.

“Y/n, you squirted it’s the best thing I could make you do, besides cum.” He smiles at you. He moves up by you on the bed leaning against the bed desk next to you.

You see his cock throbbing in his sweats and look at it and then to his eyes. “Do you want me to d-do that..” Noah picks up what you were implying immediately stoping you.

“No, not today, I just wanted to teach you and make you feel comfortable.” He breathes out, raising his hands above his head.

You take it as the opportunity to climb onto his lap sitting directly on it. His hands meets your hips “please..” you beg, “I want to help you.” Using your puppy eyes hoping he’d let you.

His mind gives up when you particularly beg for his cock. He moves you closer to him bringing his fingers to your mouth. “Open.” He commands.

You do what he says as he guides his middle and ring fingers into your mouth. “Suck them but don’t use your teeth.”

Doing what he said to do, feeling the need to use your tongue as well, you start sucking and licking his fingers.

“Fuck…” his head falls back. He pushes his fingers further into your mouth, causing you to gag. You breathe through your nose still sucking on them.

“Such a good girl.” Noah moans. Growing close to his release. You started to bob your head against his fingers as if you were going up and down on his cock. Noah’s eyes screw shut, with a low moan as he cums.

He cums so hard he shakes. You climb off him, and take his fingers out of your mouth, his arm flopping down on your side on the bed.

Noah’s seeing stars from his orgasm. He can’t believe he just came from that.

Coming back to his senses, he stands up putting his t-shirt back on, heading to your connected bathroom turning on your shower.

“Go wash up and rest…I think we did more than enough for tonight.” He leans against the doorframe in your bathroom arms cross grinning at you.

You get up from the bed nodding, heading into your bathroom.

“Goodnight, y/n.” Noah says quietly closing your door while you jump into your shower, bathroom door still open.

I relate to this a lot, because I’m not used to a guy paying attention to me like that. So when I ask someone is it normal if a guy does (ex. smell her hair) to girl he likes, I’m asking because I don’t know. So I really appreciate stories where the reader is an introvert and not an ✨introvert ✨.

Mystery of love

a/n look I am wine drunk and I have thoughts. 🤷‍♀️

summary: when two lost souls meet at their mutual friend’s party sparks fly, the question is if whatever they feel can actually bloom into something more? But that’s the mystery of love.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

It was silly truly. You weren’t big fan of parties. You didn’t ever go out really. In the beginning, it was because people didn’t invite you anywhere. You weren’t the cool kid and nerds, well, they aren’t loved all that much through high school. Then you simply outgrow that phase. Life and real responsibilities caught up with you and now you would rather spend your time at home, curled up with a book than drag yourself home from god knows what parts of the city at odd hours.

But this Friday was different. Your friend and her partner were hosting a shared birthday party. And while you could have excused yourself if it was only her boyfriend's party now that she was also celebrating hers, it meant that you didn’t have it in yourself to lie through gritted teeth. So that’s how you found yourself a homemade pie in hand, flowers beneath your armpit as you waited for someone to open the door.

“Y/n”, a loud squeak made a smile break out on your face, “And with your infamous pie. Matt, she brought the pie I told you about”, Emmy turned back, yelling over the corridor. “Oh, I’m so glad you could make it”, she clasped your upper arm in excitement, “It’s just been me and the guys, need to balance it out, you know”, she chuckled, ushering you inside.

“Everyone this is Y/n, the best friend!”, Emmy skipped into the kitchen, gesturing to you as if you were the prized possession that had to be shown off. You felt your face heating up immediately. You hated being put in a spotlight like that, yet you managed to give an awkward wave. Trying to listen in to all the names shouted around the room. Letting your eyes fall from face to face carelessly. The chances of meeting these people…

Your gaze halted as you did a double take. Bringing your gaze back to those warm chocolate orbs that looked directly at you. It seemed as if everyone had moved on. Bickering about toppings for pizza. But it’s as if you two had been glued, nether managing to look away. “Matt, the boyfriend”, you blinked a couple of times turning your attention to the side. “So the friend finally meets the infamous man”, you chuckled under your breath, leaning into the side hug he was offering. “She talks loads of you, shame I’m only meeting you now”, Matt smiled at you and you quickly returned the gesture, “Trust me, I know awfully a lot about you too”. “Should I be worried?”, he chuckled, eyes falling on Emmy, fighting her way over cheese by the counter. “No, it’s mostly good stuff”, you shrugged, as you both chuckled to yourselves.

While the evening was fun the more the time passed the more the house turned into a frat party. You glanced at your phone for what felt like a thousand times. The location of your apartment was typed into the Uber app almost an hour ago, making you feel like a shit friend since for the most part all you had been thinking about was going home. That and the brown eyes that had followed you through the night.

“Wine?”, you flinched slightly, locking your phone. “Or are you already going somewhere else?”, startled you turned to the voice behind you, ready to give your best excuse only to feel them all die down at the sight of the same brown eyes. You simply turned your glass towards him, while trying to come up with anything proper to say.

“I’m Noah by the way”, he mused tilting the bottle to fill up your glass once more. “Yn”, you muttered. “Oh, I remember”, he smiled up at you, making your cheeks turn crimson even more. “Sorry, just so many people and faces, I’m awful with names”, you whined giving him an apologetic smile. Noah simply shook his head, “Trust me, it’s almost refreshing”. You let his words wash over you as you both fall into silence once more.

“So… Where were you planning to run off to and can I join?”, Noah’s words took by surprise as you turned to him once more. A light chuckle slipped past your lips, “I was planning on going home”, you admitted with a little shrug. “Matt’s cooking not to your liking?”, his words instantly sent panic running through your veins. “Oh, no, no, it was so good. Emmy talks about his food so much and…”, you instantly felt like defending yourself, “Hey, I’m only joking”, Noah cut in, “I didn’t… Shit did I just get you all worked up over that?”, he ran a hand over his mouth looking at you.

You started at one another for a while before both falling into fits of laughter. “Sorry, shit, it’s been a while”, Noah shook his head. “No, it’s fine, I’m too introverted for this”, you brushed him off, reaching for your glass. “Can I be honest?”, Noah asked, stepping closer so he could stand beside you. You simply nodded, watching him take a sip out of the bottle. “I haven’t been able to look away from you”, he admitted, “Sounds so fucking childish but… There’s something about you”, Noah mussed turning to look at you once again. “Maybe it’s the wine?”, you shrugged, trying to not let his words make your heartbeat pick up. “I was dead ass sober when I first saw you, sweetheart”, he muttered, reaching out to brush a strand of hair behind your ear.

You couldn’t help but bite your lip as you tried to keep that smile at bay. His fingers carefully caressed your jaw before brushing over the bottom of your lip. “You would never like me sober”, you mussed pulling back. “And how would you know that?”, he pushed on, determined to keep you close. “I’m nothing like Emmy”, you pointed out, glancing back towards the kitchen where people were dancing around the counter. “Who said that I like girls like Emmy?”, Noah’s words made a shiver run down your back. “Guys always choose girls like her over girls like me”, you chuckled, taking an eager gulp of the wine in your glass. The last thing you needed was to unload years of insecurities onto a stranger.

“Funny, girls only started looking at me now, I was never the first choice”, Noah shrugged making you glance back at him. “Yeah, right”, you snorted, not able to imagine a universe where someone would pass an opportunity to date someone like him. “A strange nerd with a lisp doesn’t rank highly, darling”, he grunted making you frown, “Don’t say that about yourself”, you argued back. “Ah… But you can put yourself down?”, he smirked back at you with that knowing grin.

“Fine, we both are weird. Happy now?”, you shook your head. “Would be happier if you would go on a date with me”, Noah’s words sent another cold shower down your back. You watched him for a heartbeat. He looked like a lover boy. A black hoodie, sweet eyes. That smile. Only the tattoos covering his hands indicated a more dangerous side of him. The side you had a feeling would pull you under. “Very funny, but I’m not falling for this”, you shot him a tight smile, reminding yourself that there wasn’t a universe where a guy like him would fall for a girl like you. “You don’t know me, yet you are putting labels on me”, his hand wrapped around your upper arm as he made you halt in your tracks, “you wound me, sweetheart”, Noah muttered, leaning in.

“And who’s worried about how much you will wound me?”, your words seemed to sober him up in an instant. A frown replaced a smile that was previously there. “Why would I…”, he breathed out. “Thank you for the wine”, you lift your glass slightly towards him, “And for the chat. Tell Matt he’s a wonderful cook”, you cheered him, clicking your glass with the bottle in his hand before turning away from him. Heart beating so fast in your chest, it was making you dizzy.

“Hold on, YN”, you heard his voice as you moved across the room, avoiding contact with people. Quickly lowering your glass onto the nearest table before heading towards the door. You couldn’t look back even if everything in your body screamed for you to. Noah’s voice hunted you till you slipped outside, hurrying towards the gate, hands quickly looking for the first possible Uber.

I just saw you're taking prompt requests ☺️

1 and 16 from list 1

Noah and reader are best friends (they like each other but haven't told each other). They're on a road trip and they go to a hotel that only has one room left - the honeymoon suite! One big bed, mirrors on the ceiling and walls, you know lol. They wake up in the middle of the night cuddled together. Things start to get steamy and reader mentions she's inexperienced (not a virgin but not much experience) and Noah offers to give her a lesson. Reader says she doesn't wanna ruin their friendship but Noah says that's what friends are for. Very smutty times and then true feelings are revealed 🥹

welp rip everyone 💀

Parings: experienced best friend Noah! x slightly experienced Reader!

Warnings: best friends to lovers, fingering, guided masturbation, male and female masturbation,dirty talk, P in V, Creampie, unprotected sex, swearing, my grammar, ✨MDNI, NSFW✨

Taglist: @reyadawn @concreteangel92 @concreteemo @aubrey-melinoe @lma1986 @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @lilhobgobbler @sorrowsofsilence @blend-in-with-the-madness @noahsebastions @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @fadingangelwisp @into-the-grey @anangelinthepit @somewhere-diamond @somebodyels3 @somebodyllelse @hurricanesfollowyou @iluvmewwwww75 @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @raspberrywatermelon @thisbicc @dunnkop @philomenie @silent-stories @bloodylullaby @dravenskye @english-fucker

✨Request and Prompts are CLOSED✨

‼️IF SEX OR ANY SEXUAL CONTENT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE THIS IS NOT THE STORY FOR YOU. PROCEED WITH CAUTION‼️

Enjoy ✨🫶🏻🩶

Someone tell Addison Rae’s song Diet Pepsi, to fuck off from my brain that’s the only thing that keeps replaying💀😵‍💫 FUCKKK😩

You and Noah were on a roadtrip to go to a famous tattoo shop. The drive was more than 24 hours, so you guys knew you’d be driving for a few days. You guys stopped at a few places a long the way since it was cool and touristy around you guys.

It was now night time and both of you were completely exhausted from driving. Still having 8 hours into the drive left both you decided that getting a hotel would be best for the both of you.

You guys were still in a large tourist area so there wasn’t a lot of hotel availability around. You guys called a few places and only one right by you guys had a room left. Not taking into details about the room you guys headed straight there to get your ass in a comfy bed.

Walking into the hotel lobby with your belongings you and Noah headed to the desk.

“Hi, we called about the room availability, you guys only having one left?” You questioned to the man at the desk.

The man turned around to you smiling, you matched his smile back, as he hoped on the computer to pull it up.

“Yes, we have are honeymoon suite available. It’s our only room left, with one large bed.” He replied looking back up at Noah and I. We could both get off as a couple but never wanted destroy your friendship.

I looked over at Noah, my face beat red. The idea of sharing a bed with him making me flush and feel all sorts of things. I’m not that experienced being with men anyway, let alone anyone.

I couldn’t really speak, Noah took over agreeing it was okay for the both of us. He signed the paperwork and the man gave us the key heading up to our room.

Noah and I hopped in the elevator. The silence was deafening between the both of us.

“You okay with sharing a bed?” You asked him, seeing he was caught in a daze of some thoughts he had going on.

“Yea, it’s completely fine, we’re just friends anyway.” He shrugged, as we made our way through the hallway to the room. “It ain’t going hurt us, to sleep in the same bed for one night. I’ll even sleep on the floor if you want me to.” He insisted, making sure you were the one that was comfortable over himself.

Before you can say another word he stopped right at the door. A big door, of course the number was “69” he laughed at the fact of that.

He scanned the card making the door unlock to open, gesturing you to go in before him. You walked in and immediately greeted with a large bed, a huge shower in the bathroom with a bench. Mirrors everywhere and on the ceiling, and a private balcony over laying the city.

“Wow, wtf there’s mirrors on the ceiling.” He laughed looking up. You both laughed awkwardly about the situation.

“They must of gave us the honeymoon suite where people go to make babies I guess.” You cringed at the thought of the idea that other people have fucked in this room.

Noah chuckled again at your comment, before grabbing some clothes and stating he was going shower. You nodded to him, walking over to the balcony taking a seat and watching the view. The city was pretty quiet not much going on, no parties or rowdiness in the streets. It was pretty relaxing. After about 10 minutes Noah appeared on the balcony freshly washed, hair wet, with a clean scent that filled your nostrils.

He looked so good fuck.

You thought to yourself. Noah and you both have feelings for each other but you both never thought to bring it up knowing it could possibly harm your friendship. Noah felt the same way about it you, he liked you a lot and wanted you to himself but would never tell you.

“I guess it’s my turn..” getting up to head to the shower yourself. You stripped off your clothes already feeling hot from the situation that’s been going on. Noah is extremely attractive and you’re going to share a bed with him.

You’re going to share a bed with your best friend. You tried not to think about it too much, worried that you’d get too wet and he’d notice. You’re not exactly a virgin but you still haven’t sucked dick or really done any other sex positions or even explored your kinks.

Your last boyfriend didn’t want to do all of those things. You remembered you called Noah the night you finally had sex asking him if everything you were experiencing was normal. Your boyfriend wasn’t exactly gentle with you, and you didn’t even cum, never even had an orgasm. It was bad, thank god you guys split.

You finished washing yourself off, turned off the shower, and dried off; putting on some shorts and a t shirt you had in your bag. You put your hair up as well in a messy bun, not caring how it looked, and it was still wet anyway.

You came out the bathroom and nearly stopped breathing. Your best friend shirtless with just his sweats on was laying on your shared bed. You haven’t seen Noah shirtless many times so it was like a surprise to you. You couldn’t help but stare and he could feel your eyes on him.

“What’s wrong? You ready for bed?” He asked, putting his phone down, turning his attention to you, as you bite your lip slightly looking anywhere but him. If you thought your wetness was gone it sure as fuck was not, and you can’t exactly get off to your best friend while he was awake by you, maybe when he was asleep though.

“Yea… let’s go to sleep.” You replied, crawling into the bed, both do you sleep backs facing each other. The darkness consumed the room, a little trace of moonlight peaked through the curtains by the balcony it was pretty peaceful. You finally feel yourself drift off to sleep.

*time skip*

You woke up in the middle of the night hot as fuck. It doesn’t help that you were literally cuddling in Noah’s arms. His arms wrapped around you tightly, his light snores in your ear, his grip on your lower stomach, having his hand under you shirt, and his fucking boner against your back. It was all overwhelming to wake up to. Not to mention the big ache that remained between your legs as you went to sleep next to problem that caused it.

Noah felt you shift around slightly moving out of his arms, his eyes opening seeing the situation. His low sleepy voice could have made you cum itself.

He didn’t move, he only pulled you closer, his dick digging into you further. You didn’t want to bother him but it was hard when it was bothering you.

“Noah..” you whispered, making him stir slightly. “Mmm..” he replied, rubbing his eyes.

“You’re poking me..” you groaned, clenching your thighs. His body immediately moved from yours onto his back, now fully awake, realizing the situation.

“Oh.. sorry..” he whispered, his voice low from sleeping. Your felt yourself clench again, the ache feeling heavier than normal. Noah got up to go into the bathroom to take care of it, however you felt guilty for some reason, catching his attention by whispering his name.

“Noah..” he stopped in his tracks, turning himself towards you.

“Yea Angel?” The pet name slipping out. Making you blush under the darkness of the room.

“It hurts..” you whine. Feeling yourself feeling too horny and not sure how to take care of it. You haven’t even touched yourself, or even sucked someone off. You felt embarrassed asking for his help.

“What hurts..” Noah moved closer to you now feeling concern. You don’t know how to describe it, it didn’t hurt it ached.

You knew it could change everything if you let him play with you, but who would you be more comfortable with than your best friend, what are best friends for?

“It aches, idk what to do...” your hands came to cover your face as the embarrassment finally settles in. Noah didn’t say a word, didn’t move either. You felt him take a deep breath before speaking.

“I can help you, I’ll show you.” He spoke softly, placing a hand on your knee, that was pressed against your chest.

“Are you sure… I don’t want to ruin our-“ he cut you off mid sentence, not caring. He had feelings for you he would even confess them right now if it was the right time.

“Of course, what are friends for?” He replied, making you feel a little better. “Okay..” you relaxed moving your legs to extend out to him. He took your legs slightly stroking them. His cock was so hard it hurt him.

“I’m going tell you want to do okay. I’m going instruct you, if you want help I’ll help you.” He stated.

You felt yourself shiver at his words. You don’t want to expose yourself to him but it was dark enough that he wouldn’t see anyway. He moved his way up right by you sitting by you.

“Take your shorts off.” He commanded, breathing a little heavy. He palmed himself while watching your moves.

You slide your shorts down your legs, feeling the slick in between toue legs exposed. You’re completely soaked through, and down your legs. You could hear Noah’s light groan at the sight. The moonlight was dim enough to show the both of you, but not too bright to show you all to him.

“You’re soaked… fuck.” He muttered to himself. He re aligned his thoughts to helping you again. “Run your finger over yourself, like you’re teasing yourself.” He commented.

You did as you were told. Your finger running over your covered slit that was soaked, adding a little bit of pressure to it. It felt so good, the fabric sticking your skin, you heard Noah groan lightly right by you.

“Take them off.” He exclaimed, squeezing himself slightly. You looked over at him wanting to play a game with him as well.

“You take yours off too.” You replied, as your fingers hooked around your panties sliding them off and down your legs.

Noah didn’t argue with you, he did the same. You spread yourself out, waiting for his next move for you. You watched has he pumped himself slightly, the moonlight shined on his hard cock, you can tell shit was more than 6 inches. It was gonna hurt if it went inside you.

“Put your middle finger in and slowly pump it in and out. Match the pace I’m at.” Noah states, while he pumps himself slowly, watching your moves.

Your hand moved down to your core sliding your middle finger all the way in. You were tight since only being with one person and never touching yourself. You gasped at the feeling before adding another finger without Noah’s command. He didn’t care though it was about how you felt and you could even stop if you wanted to.

You pumped two fingers into yourself in and out at the pace Noah pumped himself at. You watched him squeeze himself around the tip, wanting nothing more than his hands on you, fingering you himself. His fingers were longer anyway.

“Curl your fingers.” He said, while watching you both breathing heavier. You whined not doing as he said. Wanting him to finger you and make you cum.

“What’s the matter?” His eyebrows furrowed, he stopped his movements.

“I want… you to do it.” You felt your face heat up. Your best friend is going to finger you. Would he even be okay doing this?

“Is that what you want?” He answered with a question, his hand stroking your leg slightly waiting for you to reply.

“Yes. Please Noah, make me cum.” You cried feeling his fingers move to your clit, adding some light pressure to it.

His fingers played with your clit for a little bit, before moving to your wet slit. He eased two of his fingers in feeling how you sucked them in and your walls would clench around them. He wanted to let out a moan himself.

“You’re so tight.” He exclaimed, moving his fingers in and out of you slightly. You breathed heavier feeling that the pleasure was finally enough. His fingers keep going at a faster pace hitting some spots in you, you don’t think were possible.

“Fuck…” you whined, feeling your eyes roll back. Noah keep up his pace, he was not stopping. He wanted you to cream around his fingers, he wanted you to come undone under you. There was no friendship happening after this.

“You feel good Angel.” His thumb working on your clit as well. His other hand holding your hips down so you’d stop squirming and running away from him.

“Mmmm hmm.” You couldn’t even let out words, his fingers here curling into your cunt so good it was nothing you ever felt before. You felt the pleasure in you growing stronger. You stomach tightening as well.

Is this what it felt like?

You wondered. Noah was good and pleasuring woman. He’s been with many of them, he knows the ins and outs of a woman’s pleasure and how to make them cum. If anything he could get off just to you cumming.

His fingers keep hitting the sweet spot inside you making you arch off the bed, eyes rolling back. The room was filled with your cries and Noah’s praises. It was filthy, the way you could see yourself on the ceiling.

“Closeeee…” you cried, the only words you could let out. Noah has officially fucked you out your mind. You could break his fingers from how hard you were squeezing him inside.

“Cum for me… let go.” Noah breathed, feeling himself twitch while watching you cum. You flooded his fingers, shaking slightly at the feeling. You were sensitive as can be.

Noah took his fingers out taken them to his mouth.

You heard him moan around them. “You taste amazing.” He smirked. Getting off the bed you could see his hard cock. He was ready to clean you up and take another shower for himself, but you stopped him.

“Please.. let me have you.” You pleaded, watching his eyes darken again at the idea of having your tight pussy around him.

“You sure Angel?” Noah asked, looking at your face for any signs of doubt or concern.

“Yes, please I know you want this too.” You met his face, pleading a light kiss to his lips. He returned the kiss as well laying you down under him.

You took your hand down to his cock, feeling how hard and sensitive it was. Noah stuttered at the feeling making you turn your glaze back up to him.

“Sensitive..” he replied, feeling your hand pump him. His head fell down to his shoulder eyes closed and mouth open at the feeling.

He had to stop you or he could’ve came all over you.

“I’m so sensitive I could cum right now.” His voice shaking slightly. Making you laugh a little. His finger tap your nose jokingly.

Noah got up running to his bag grabbing lube that he brought with him. You cocked your eyebrow at the fact he had lube.

“You carry that with you?” You questioned, as he rubbed a little lube onto his cock, making it easier to slip into you.

“You never know..” he looked back up to you with a soft smile. His tip rubbed against your folds. He looked up at you again for approval seeing you nod, as he pushed himself in slowly. The stretch was there, it definitely stinged. Noah watched your eyebrows furrow, and paused so you can adjust. After a few minutes he pushed more of himself in almost all the way in.

“You’re so big..” you whine. He chuckled at your comment, stroking your stomach.

“You’re so tight.” He argued back, pushing the rest of him in. Noah stayed there for a little bit already feeling close, like a damn virgin. You made him feel like virgin again.

You grinding your pelvis into his in an attempt to get any friction. Noah groaned at the feeling, before starting to move making you gasp. The pain was all gone the pleasure was everywhere.

He rocked his hips into you, making you moan at the feeling. His hand trailed to your shoulder holding onto you while the other was on your hip.

“Noahh..” you whined, it all felt too good. He made you feel close again. His cock starting hitting your cervix making your see stars at the feeling.

“Such a good girl for my cock.” He groaned, leaning back down to your ear. “Such a tight pussy just for me.” His words made you clench down on him, he can hear you whine more at the feeling of him.

“You like dirty talk huh?” He asked, smirking while his hand grabbed your boob. He flicked your nipple as well making a loud moan escape you.

Noah felt close, but he wanted to wait for you, he wanted to wait for you to come undone for him, he didn’t want to cum before you.

“Noah… I’m close..” his dick but your g spot over and over drilling into it. Your head thrown back while he continued to fuck into you. You couldn’t say words, couldn’t even hear. Your orgasm came so hard you saw stars, and maybe even heard colors while you were at. He fucked your mind up.

You felt Noah release into you, shortly after. He whimpered against you, stilling his hips as he twitched inside you a few times. Both of you were extremely sensitive and tired.

After a few minutes of lying like this with him. You decided to pop the question.

“Noah, what are we now?” You asked, a little concerned, thinking you ruined your friendship for good.

“Do you want to stay friends, because I want you all to myself if I’m being truly honest.” His head lifting off your chest to look at your face.

“I want to be with you.” You replied right away. Your words caused him to place a kiss to your lips, as it was the right and only answer for him.

“Me too.” He snuggled into you. You both feel asleep like this with his cock still inside you.

…. AUGGHHH I’m sorry if it wasn’t exactly how you wanted it to be. I think it turned out great regardless. REQUEST AND PROMPTS are CLOSED I’m not longer taking any.

Thank you for your prompt request my beautiful anonymous, this was amazing🫶🏻

The Devil's Advocate - Chapter 7

Pairing: Delinquent!Noah Sebastian X Pastor's Daughter!Reader

Summary: Noah is a delinquent with a lot of anger at the church. You're a pastor's daughter plagued by moral perfectionism, charged with overseeing the community service he's been sentenced to complete. You've never encountered true temptation before. How will you fare up against Noah, who not only isn't bound by the same rules of purity as you, but actively scoffs at them?

Rating: 18+ Minors DNI

Warnings: Angst, religious guilt, mentions of religious trauma, mentions of masturbation. Mentions of anti-choice propaganda.

Masterlist

Banner by @flowerynerds

Authors note: Maybe grab a cup of tea for this one.

_________

Noah Davis didn’t like to think of his actions in terms of morality. He understood that right and wrong were subjective. That life didn’t exist in binaries of good vs. evil, and that things like virtue and righteousness weren’t so easily defined. 

That didn’t mean there weren’t some steadfast rules he followed: 

Do his best to act in a way that aligns with his internal moral compass

Reduce harm much as possible

Do what’s best for the collective, while still keeping his best interests in mind

That line of thinking has served him well over the course of his lifetime. He’d freed himself from moral obligations and had done what he truly felt was best, and in doing so, he was able to walk through life with his head held high, standing by his actions. 

The idea that some of his behavior was sinful had not entered his mind since he formally left the church. 

But now, as he laid in bed, recovering from the tsunami of brain chemicals that just flooded his system, he felt like a sinner . 

The sin coursed through his body, sick and bittersweet. It flowed through his veins, infecting his cells and rotting his bones like a poison. Like a drug. 

He scrubbed a hand over his face, clammy palm meeting clammy forehead, cock still twitching with the aftershock. 

He’d expected you to put up more of a fight. He’d banked on you shutting him down, batting him away and telling him to behave himself, but you’d walked so willingly into his snare, so eager and needy, offering up yourself on a platter with almost no hesitation. 

It was a vile thing that you brought out of Noah. An ugly, profane creature that lurked in the shadows of his soul. He’d been aware of its existence in his periphery. It had been a sleeping beast. One he’d hoped he’d never have to contend with. 

But now? It had taken its first shuddering breath, and with it, thrown down its gauntlet. Its demand? You—not as a partner, but as a sacrifice. Sprawled out on an altar for it to consume and defile. To claim for the sake of hubris. 

Noah longed to find a way to cleanse himself—confess his sins and pray the rosary. Baptize himself in holy water. Take communion and walk forth a forgiven man. Would that be enough? 

War had been waged within Noah, and the odds were stacked against him. He was David, standing at the feet of Goliath. Jonah, staring down the gullet of the whale. 

He squeezed his eyes shut and the image of you at the apex of pleasure flashed across his vision. You’d made that offering to him. It was sacred. He’d cherish it for the rest of his life.  

_______

Noah had no holy water available to him to wash his sins away. He did have a hot shower, though, and at least that was a start. 

Turning on the water, he allowed the steam to gather in clouds around his bathroom. His skin had grown sticky with sweat, and his shoulders ached. As soon as he stepped under the spray, the tension began to dissipate. 

He pressed his forehead against the cool tile wall and allowed the stream to trickle down his back. 

He had a duty to himself—and to you. There was no denying his affection for you, but therein lied a glaring problem: you were ready for more. You deserved more. You deserved to push past these boundaries of purity and explore who you were outside of faith, and that made you vulnerable. Because whatever sickness lived inside Noah was itching to exploit that vulnerability. Not for your benefit, but for its own.

“Help me figure this out,” he whispered against the shower wall. It was a prayer in the most ironic sense. He wasn’t sure if he even believed in what he was praying to, but without any other ideas, it felt like the right thing to do. “I don’t want to hurt her, but I’m afraid.” 

He received nothing but silence in response. 

He scoffed at his own actions. What did he expect? Divine understanding? 

He grabbed the soap, lathering it up before scrubbing it over his disgusting, unclean body. Why did he even bother? He learned long ago that nobody was going to save him but himself. If he wanted his demons to die, he’d have to be the one to kill them. 

________

On a snowy Sunday morning, Noah didn’t have a church to attend, but he did have a pair of work boots, a heavy coat, and a trail through the woods that allowed him to commune with nature. 

He also had a pre-roll he stole from Nick, which he cupped against his jacket to light. It took a few tries. The wind wasn’t biting, but it was present, and it flickered the flame in his lighter. He eventually got it lit though, and he took a deep drag, holding the smoke in his lungs and waiting for it to take effect. 

Exhaling slowly through his nose, he closed his eyes to focus on the high setting in. His body began to lift, a warm, cloudy, hollow feeling expanding out from his chest to his limbs, and ten minutes later, the joint was spent and Noah was intricately connected to the forest around him.

He walked on the trail, delighting in the way the frozen leaves crunched under his boots. He forgot his gloves again, so he stuffed his hands in his pockets as he walked. 

You were probably in church right now. Might even be on stage leading the praise and worship music alongside Isaac, where you were safe. 

No, that wasn’t true. You deserved more than the life you’d find within the church. If you stayed put, you’d eventually find yourself on the arm of some 30-something with a trust fund and a perfect attendance record at Sunday school. You’d have to hide who you were from society, pretending to fit in where you didn’t belong. 

Noah dug his nails into the palms of his hands. He wanted you to have more than that, but he wasn’t the right person to give it to you. At least not in his current state. 

Giving up the idea of you was painful, yes. But it also gave him time to figure out how to contend with the ugly parts of himself. If he could let go of his desire for you, then he wouldn’t have to risk that part of him taking over. He could lock it back into the cage he’s kept it in for so many years and continue on in life as if nothing had ever happened. 

He’d never have to know that hunger again. 

He breathed in deep, allowing the frigid air to sting his lungs and throat. It wasn’t painful enough for him. He needed to toil and sweat and suffer to repent for his sins. He picked up his pace, letting his feet fall heavy onto the ground. Within a few minutes, his heart rate sped up, lungs stretching to accommodate his increased need for oxygen. All systems firing to pump fresh blood through his body. 

That helped. Maybe he could sweat the fever out. Force the toxicity to exit through carbon dioxide and leave it as an offering to the forest so it can convert it back to oxygen. 

He broke out into a run, thinking back to the time he caught you running in the rain and wondering if you’d been seeking the same energetic cleanse. 

You’d cried in his arms that night. 

He slowed his pace, down from a run to a jog. 

It was the first time he’d noticed something wrong—the first time he sensed that his control was slipping. 

A stray root caught his foot and he fell hard to the ground, catching himself with his palms and knees. He stayed there for a moment to assess his body and see if any damage had occurred, and when he found none, he rolled onto his back and laid in the snow and mud, stretching his arms and legs to the side and creating a snow angel. 

The snow fell lightly, catching on his eyelashes. He stuck out his tongue, allowing the tiny flakes to melt upon contact and tasting the nothingness of it all. 

He closed his eyes, and he was thirteen again. A nude magazine lay open on his floor. He’d just finished masturbating for the third time that day. Sobbing, he grabbed the leather belt hanging over his desk chair and whipped himself across the back with it. Harder this time than last. Perhaps with enough pain, he would learn his lesson. 

He bunched a shirt up and stuffed it into his mouth, biting down hard to muffle himself as he wept. God surely wouldn’t forgive him again after this. He would be sent to hell for being so unclean. 

For months, he’d tried to break this disgusting habit, but it was to no avail. He was sick and perverted, and lacked the self-control he needed to resist temptation.  

He didn’t want to go to confessional. He didn’t want to have to hear his priest’s disappointed voice telling him to say ten hail-marys. 

He took a deep, shuddering breath in, noticing how the icy air stabbed at his lungs. He didn’t want to dwell too long on that memory. He could already feel his throat constricting. 

It wasn’t until he befriended Ruffilo that he realized he wasn’t uniquely perverted. Ruffilo hadn’t been raised in a church. He talked about porn as if it was something exciting, rather than shameful. He’d been the first one to bring up the subject of masturbation, making casual comments and jokes about how often he got himself off. 

Ruffilo’s world—a world without shame—had been a foreign concept to Noah. After being exposed to it, he realized that faith and freedom were mutually exclusive. There was no way to balance the two, so he chose freedom and never looked back. 

Noah’s fingers found a frozen leaf. He caressed the edges, feeling how smooth they were and remembered brushing bits of leaves off your coat that time you’d jumped in the leaf pile. He remembered how you gasped when his frigid hands ghosted over the nape of your neck. He could have cut the tension with a knife. 

He couldn’t go back to the church. There was too much pain there to revisit. He cut off that part of him a long time ago, back when believing in God meant engaging in his own self-destruction. 

Being with you meant dipping his toes back in the water of religion. You and faith were a package deal. He knew that. You weren’t going to give it up any time soon, and certainly not for him. 

He closed his eyes again and felt the sting of saltwater. He wasn’t going to cry. He’d done enough of that in his adolescence. But the feelings were there, and they weren’t going to let him off the hook without being felt. 

It was you or self-preservation.

He inhaled deeply and forced himself back up, turning to start the long trek back to town. A conversation needed to be had. 

________

There was no priest to whom he could confess his sins, but there was Folio, and late on a Sunday afternoon, he could be found stoned in his room. 

“I fucked up,” he announced, standing in the doorway.

Nick was on his bed, controller in his hands and headset on. From where Noah stood, he couldn’t see the screen, but he guessed his friend was mowing down enemies in Call of Duty. 

“In the middle of something,” he said. “Give me a few.” 

Noah invited himself into the room and sat in Nick’s desk chair, observing the décor. Nick decorated his walls with posters of women in various states of undress. Some of them were holding fish. Others were posed on top of cars. 

His fishing rod and tackle box rested in the corner next to his desk. An electric drum kit lined the far wall. Clothes were strewn about the room, along with drumsticks, food wrappers, and half-empty water bottles. A few cans of beer spilled out of the overfull trash can. On the nightstand sat an ashtray with the spent ends of several blunts stuffed in the center. 

Quite the confessional booth. 

“What’s up?” he said, taking his headset off and turning his attention to Noah. 

“I fucked up,” Noah repeated. 

Nick blinked twice, but made no other movement. “Okay,” he said. “In what way?” 

“You already know.” 

“The pastor’s daughter?” Nick guessed, tilting his head lower to stare at Noah through furrowed brows. “Did you fuck her?” His tone was accusatory, and deservedly so. 

Noah shook his head. “Not exactly.” 

Nick turned on his bed to face Noah head-on. “What did you do?” 

Noah deliberated over exactly how much to tell his friend. What happened between the two of you last night was private and he didn’t want to share your business with someone else unless you said it was okay, but he needed to get some things off his chest. 

“So,” he began, taking a deep breath and shaking his head. “I think I need to stay away from her for a while. I’ve got some stuff to sort out and until I do, I might hurt her.” 

Nick gave himself time to fully process what Noah had just said. He inhaled deeply through his nose, letting his eyes drift away from Noah and relaxing his focus as he mulled it over. 

“You really care about her?” he asked. 

Noah nodded. 

“Want me to stay away from her, too?” It was an honest question, and Noah was suddenly struck with how much his friends cared about him. 

Noah squeezed and relaxed his hands a few times to increase circulation in his fingers. They were still cold from his walk. 

“No, actually. If anything, I think you’d be a really good influence for her. She could use someone like you.” 

Nick’s eyebrows pulled up in the center. He tilted his head to the side. “Why do you say that?” 

“She needs to have more fun,” he said. “She’s been repressed for a really long time and I think she’s ready to break out of that and live life.” 

Nick’s eyes went wide and he  pointed to his chest. “And you want me to be the one to help with that?” 

Noah didn’t want Nick to do that. The last thing he wanted was to see you enjoying yourself without him, but if it was between that and you staying miserable under the church’s influence, he at least wanted you to be happy. 

“I think you’d be good for her,” he said, working hard to make sure he didn’t sound bitter at all. 

“What if I fuck her?” he asked, his momentary sincerity seemingly over. 

Noah’s face dropped. “Don’t fuck her.” 

“But what if I do?” 

Noah clenched his jaw, grinding his molars together as he steadied himself. He knew Nick didn’t mean anything by it. He was just being himself and trying to rile Noah up, but Noah wasn’t about to give in. 

“Then make sure you’re on the same page with her about what it means. Don’t lead her on.” 

Nick chewed on his tongue. “Where is all this coming from?” He asked. “Why do you think you’ll hurt her?” 

“I guess,” Noah said, picking at a bit of dead skin on his lip, “It’s sort of just a gut feeling? I don’t know how to describe it, but there’s something in there that tells me I gotta sort myself out before I get involved with anyone.” 

Nick blinked up at his friend, softening. “I didn’t realize you were so serious about her.” 

“I don’t know what I feel,” said Noah. “I just need some time to figure that out.” 

“You okay?” he asked, hand coming up to scratch an itch at the back of his neck. 

Noah nodded. “I will be,” he said. It was true, he would be okay eventually. He was sure of that. He’d survived worse than this. He just needed to figure out what the best course of action would be. 

Nick’s eyes flicked back to the paused game on the screen. “So you’re saying it’s cool if I fuck her then?” he said. 

Nick could be a real asshole at times. He was abrasive by nature. Many found his personality overwhelming, but the ones who stuck around knew that he was an antagonist, not to be mean, but to challenge people—coax them out of their comfort zones and force them to confront their triggers. He wasn’t always right, and he often stuck his own foot in his mouth, but when he was right, he was so right, it made up for all the other times. 

This time, however, he used his skill to diffuse the tension. 

“Man, fuck you,” said Noah, slapping the ash tray off the end table. It tipped over sideways and spilled its contents onto Nick’s bed, coating his sheets with ash and spent roaches. 

“Bro!” Nick shouted, but Noah was already out of the room, hissing to himself with laughter, and Nick was too couch locked to chase him. 

________

“Noah said to tell you he’s sorry. He got called in for overtime again,” Nick said as he walked into the community center seven minutes late. 

Your heart sank. Not just because you wouldn’t get to see Noah, but because he could have easily texted this information to you himself. 

It was as you’d suspected. Noah was avoiding you.

Over the course of the week, you’d grown more and more stressed. Sunday was fine. You’d woken up feeling well rested, having dreamt of Noah throughout the night. At church, you couldn’t focus on any of the sermon because you were too consumed reliving the previous night. 

Monday came and went with no word from Noah. You thought for sure he would have texted you to say hi or check up on you. Some sort of acknowledgement that the dynamic between the two of you had shifted. But you’d also heard it was customary to wait three days. 

So you waited. 

By Wednesday, your patience had grown thin. You’d given him the benefit of the doubt, wondering if maybe he was nervous and waiting for you to reach out, so you had, sending him a casual hey . 

He never responded. You’d been checking your phone religiously over the course of the week, but it had been radio silence on his end. 

“Okay. Thanks for letting me know.” You kept a straight face and a steady voice while you spoke, but it took effort. “We’re supposed to be shoveling snow today but since there’s only us, I’m going to veto that.” 

Nick sighed in relief. “Thank god . I wasn’t built for the cold.” 

“Get inside,” you nodded towards the doors. “We’ll start with windows.” 

He offered up a salute and bounded through the doors, eager to escape the cold. 

As Nick got to work, you processed this information. 

Noah’s silence was deafening. 

Was this your punishment? Was God unhappy with your behavior and was this his way of letting you know? 

An element to this was fitting. This was the cost, you realized. This was the price you paid for giving into temptation. 

A bitter laugh escaped under your breath. 

Was the church right about everything? Was there a reason you shouldn’t fall into temptation? 

Maybe Hell did exist—and it wasn’t a lake of fire, but the absence of Heaven after you’d already tasted it.  

Even after everything, you probably would still have done it all over again if you had the opportunity. He’d introduced you to a part of yourself that had been dormant for a long time and for that, you were grateful. 

But the price was steep. 

Your biggest regret was that you hadn’t even gotten to touch him before it was all over. You felt so stupid. Why couldn’t you have held out a little longer? Resisted temptation until you had him fully within your grasp? 

But then again, perhaps the loss of him would be even more painful, wouldn’t it? 

You sighed and stretched your arms up, resting your forearms on your head as you observed Nick spraying down the windows with cleaner. 

You could get through this. It would be hard, but it was within your grasp. People have survived much worse. In the grand scheme of things, this heartache was minor. It would hurt for a while, but eventually you’d recover and life would go on. 

It was just a matter of getting to the other side. 

You wanted to remember this pain. Savor the full impact and hopefully this would be the only time you needed to learn this lesson. You’d grow, heal, and move on a better and stronger version of yourself. 

Eventually. 

Right now, you needed to focus on the task at hand: overseeing community service without getting yourself into any more trouble. And that’s what you were going to do.  ________

That did prove to be a tougher job than you anticipated. Nick was charismatic as ever and kept trying to get your attention. 

You’d throw him a bone every once in a while, if only because it genuinely did lift your spirits to be around him. He was a much safer presence. 

“How many weeks do I have left?” 

You were strewn across the back pew, doing your best not to wallow, but failing pretty spectacularly, when Nick’s voice broke you out of your ruminations. 

“I’m not sure,” you said, sitting up and looking at him. He leaned casually against the back of the pew, rag thrown over his shoulder. His fingers tapped a rhythm on the wood. “I have it written down somewhere. I’d have to look.” 

“Can you let me know next week?” he asked, bouncing on his heels. You could see what attracted Ava to him so much. 

“Yeah.” 

“Or actually, maybe this Friday. Isn’t that when your Christmas thing is?” 

You blinked stupidly up at him. You’d forgotten all about the upcoming showcase. 

“Oh, yeah. It is. I didn’t realize you knew about it.” 

“Yeah,” he said, and then shifted on his feet as if he was trying to figure out a way to avoid saying that Noah told him about it. Which would mean that Nick was also aware of the awkwardness between the two of you. 

“Were you thinking of going?” you asked. “You don’t have to.” 

“I thought it might be fun to see you sing,” he said, voice soft and lips smiling.  

You were momentarily taken aback. You didn’t think Nick cared about anything you were doing. The thought that he might be interested in your life outside of community service was one that hadn’t crossed your mind. 

“Really?” you asked. 

He looked side to side and nodded, as if it should have been obvious to you. 

“Nick, that would mean so much. I would love for you to come.” 

“Good,” he said, a self-satisfied smile back on his face. “But try not to suck or I won’t be donating anything.” 

You snorted loudly. “Thanks for the vote of confidence.” 

“Anytime.” 

The conversation died down, and you could feel the elephant in the room rearing its head. 

You could ask how Noah was doing. It wouldn’t be too out-of-character. But you’d give yourself away easily if you did. 

Besides, nothing good would come of it. If Noah wanted to contact you, he would. If he didn’t, then he was just someone you needed to get over. 

Nick lingered, just as hesitant to leave the conversation. 

“You doin’ okay?” he asked. 

You sighed, leaning into the back of the pew. “Yeah,” you said. “I’m fine.” 

“Wanna talk about it?” he asked. 

You rolled your head across the pew to look over at him. His face held a neutral expression, but there was softness in his eyes. 

“Maybe some other time,” you said. “Thank you, though.” 

“No problem,” he said. “I’m here if you need me.” He punctuated it with a squeeze to your shoulder and your hand came up to clasp over his on its own accord. He was warm, and truth be told, you really needed the gesture. 

Perhaps you’d be okay. 

_______

“And there were no signs prior to this?” 

“No,” you said, collapsing on Ava’s bed while she worked on her Contemporary Art project from her desk. It looked like a big lump of Styrofoam. She held a strip of sandpaper, rubbing it back and forth over a corner and causing little pieces to flake off and litter the desk and floor beneath her. 

“And neither of you talked beforehand about what it would mean?” 

“No,” you grumbled, recognizing your first mistake. You absolutely should have talked about what it meant for the both of you before doing anything, and you can’t understand why you’d been so foolish to skip over that. “It just sort of…happened?” 

Ava fixed you with an imploring stare. 

“Babe, I’m really sorry that you got hurt, but. I don’t know,” she began. “Aren’t you always the one preaching about that kind of thing? It seems like you could have used a little bit of your own advice, don’t you think?” 

You turned over and let out a loud groan into Ava’s pillow. 

“Not helping.” 

“I know, I know. That was probably insensitive. I just,” she trailed off, turning back to her project. “Maybe this was a lesson you needed to learn? Not to look down on others for the things they struggle with. And maybe also to recognize that we’re all human. We’re all sinners. Even you?” 

You pouted. “You really think I needed to learn that?” 

“You’ve been known to judge in the past.” 

“I’ve been better about that!” you said, throwing your hands up in the air. 

“I know,” she said. “I know you have.” She pouted back at you. “Maybe I’m not the best person for this kind of talk.” 

You sighed, crossing your arms over your stomach. “No, you’re fine. I think I’m just feeling sorry for myself is all.” 

Ava got up from her desk, brushing as many Styrofoam flakes from her clothes as she could, and crawled into her bed with you, wrapping her arms around your shoulders. You melded into her touch. “You’re allowed to feel hurt. He did send you mixed signals.” 

“What about you and Nick?” you asked. She chewed on her lip for a moment. 

“Nick and I…we talked about it beforehand. We knew it was just for that night going into it.” She rested her chin on your shoulder. 

“You didn’t want to pursue anything more?” 

Ava shrugged beside you. “Neither of us is looking for anything.” 

You leaned your head on her shoulder. It would have been nice had you had the same disposition going into the encounter with Noah. You could have just enjoyed it for what it was and then went your separate ways without any complicated feelings. You admired Ava’s ability to do that. 

“You’re right,” you said. “We should have talked about it beforehand. Made sure we were on the same page.” 

You turned to bury your face in her shoulder, squeezing your eyes shut to keep any tears from escaping. 

“It doesn’t always work out that way,” she said. “Don’t judge yourself for your mistakes.” 

She stroked your back as you failed to prevent your eyes from leaking. “Is it okay if I cry on you?” you asked, voice muffled by her shirt, a stray piece of Styrofoam finding its way into your mouth. 

“Babe, of course. I’m here for you.” 

You nodded into her shoulder, allowing the first of many sobs to fall. She continued to stroke your back, soothing you as you wept. 

It hurt. You’d trusted Noah to care for you. You never would have believed him to be the type to get what he wants and then not call. 

Plus, he still had five weeks of community service (you’d checked), and there wasn’t any way he could get out of that. 

“How am I supposed to face him on Saturday?” you whined. 

“Hmmm,” she said. “Is Folio talking to you?” 

“Yeah,” you sniffed. “He’s actually been really nice.” 

“What if you just talk to him? Use him as a distraction so you don’t have to talk to Noah. Who knows? Maybe having fun with him would help you move on.” 

You pulled away to look at her. 

“You mean like…?” you trailed off. 

She laughed. “I’m not saying have sex with the guy,” she said. “I doubt he’d do that since Noah’s like, his best friend. But he’s a good guy and he’s fun to be around. And you could use that kind of energy in your life.” 

You sniffled again and let your head drop back down to rest on her, spitting out another fleck of Styrofoam. It truly was everywhere. 

You doubted that hanging out with Nick would help you get over Noah. If anything, it would just remind you of him. But you did need more friends in your life, and he was someone you could see yourself getting along with. 

Perhaps focusing on your friendships would help. You squeezed Ava’s middle. 

“I love you,” you said. “Please be my friend forever.” 

She breathed softly, squeezing you back. “If you play your cards right.” 

______

Friday’s showcase had a much larger turnout than expected. People lined the pews and even stood in the back after all the available seats had been filled. You peeked through one of the side doors that entered onto the stage and saw Nick sitting in a middle row. Ava sat a few rows in front of him. She caught your eye and gave you a big thumbs-up for good luck. 

Your eyes scanned over the crowd, searching for a tall, tattooed figure and coming up short. 

He said he was going to come. He was the one who had pressed you for the information in the first place. 

You looked down at your phone screen. 6:53. He still had seven minutes to make it. 

You exhaled a deep breath and shook your hands out, trying to calm your nerves. 

“Want to pray?” came Isaac’s deep voice to your right. You looked over to find him standing quite close to you. His usual v-neck and beanie had been swapped out for a white button-down and black tie, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His hair was tied neatly in a bun atop his head. 

“Sure,” you breathed, figuring you could use some prayer. 

He grasped your hands in his. His were warm. Steady. They helped to soothe your nerves. 

“God,” he began, “please watch over us and guide us as we work to spread the good news of Jesus’s birth. Let us not falter. Allow our voices to ring true and fall on ears willing to hear. In your name. Amen.” 

“Amen,” you repeated, working hard not to roll your eyes. 

It wasn’t that you didn’t appreciate the prayer. It was just that Isaac talked as if he were living a hundred years ago, trying his best to sound profound, and you weren’t entirely convinced it was solely for God’s listening pleasure. He was a performer, after all. 

He squeezed your hands, smiling. “Almost time. Are you nervous?” he asked. 

“A little bit,” you said, noticing the discomfort in your gut. 

“Don’t be. You’ve got this. It’s just the one solo and then you’re in the choir for the rest of it.” His thumbs rubbed over the backs of your hands, and you were about to pull your hands away from him, but it actually was quite soothing. He seemed like he genuinely cared about you. And he smelled nice. Some sort of expensive-smelling cologne that was the complete opposite of whatever spiced oil Noah wore, but in a really good, clean way. 

“You look great, by the way,” he added, taking a step back and giving you a once-over. “I like the dress.” 

The dress in question was a high-necked A-line in a bright shade of red to match the holiday theme (Christmas theme, your father would correct you, because apparently no other holidays existed to him). 

You wore a dark green cardigan overtop, along with a gold necklace and black heels. Your lips were painted to match the dress. It was the most dressed-up you’d been since last Christmas. When you chose the outfit, you were still under the impression that a certain tattooed someone would see it. 

“Thanks,” you said. 

You could tell by the way Isaac lingered that he wanted to continue the conversation, but you didn’t feel much like talking. Needing an exit, you excused yourself to go get a drink of water. 

Weaving through other soloists and members of the church choir, you made your way down one of the two hallways that flanked either side of the main sanctuary. You rounded the corner, where one of the members of your church’s worship band—Darian—was passing out programs for the event. 

“Hey! You ready for your solo?” he asked when he saw you. 

You smiled, breathing out a nervous laugh. “Yeah,” you said, scanning the stragglers still arriving for any sign of Noah. 

“I’d be nervous if I was on first,” he said. You took your eyes off the latecomers and looked to find him smiling encouragingly at you. 

“Yeah,” you said, shifting your weight awkwardly. “Isaac insisted for some reason that I open.” 

Your stomach sank even more. You couldn’t see Noah anywhere. 

“He mentioned it was because your song would set the tone for the evening,” said Darian, but you were only half-listening. “Do you want one of these?” 

You looked back at him. “What?”

He held out a program for you to take. “In case you wanted to keep it. For posterity, or scrapbooking or whatever.” 

“Yeah, sure,” you said, grabbing it without really thinking. 

Your emotional bandwidth had been all but used up, chest tight and head foggy. You felt bad that you weren’t really engaging in conversation, or even paying attention to it for that matter, but hoped Darian would forgive you. 

Sensing that you weren’t in the headspace to talk, Darian wished you luck and went back to handing out programs. You thanked him and continued walking across the foyer and down the opposite hallway with no real destination in mind. You were to go on in less than a minute. 

You shook your head, trying to get out of it and into your body. You needed to connect with your voice in order to perform, but you couldn’t seem to steady your breathing. 

The sanctuary was laid out in a rectangle, with the foyer lining the back, hallways with classrooms running the length of either side, and then a room behind the main stage, so from where you stood at the end of the hall, you could see through the windows of the doors to the stage that the lights had dimmed. 

Isaac walked out to the center of the stage from the hallway opposite you. A spotlight appeared on him, and with an abundance of charismatic charm, he thanked the audience that had gathered, before leading them in yet another prayer to bless the evening’s performance and to let God’s will be done. 

Throughout the entirety of his introduction, you’d zoned in and out. Your nerves ate at you, consuming your focus and leaving you feeling detached from your surroundings. 

You’d performed this song a dozen times at least, and in front of much of the same audience, too. You performed every week in front of the congregation on Sundays. Perhaps you’d struggled with stage fright at one point in your life, a decade ago when you were still fairly new to performing, but these days you were at-home in front of a microphone. 

And yet. 

Your knees shook. A cold sweat had broken out on the back of your neck, and your stomach clenched and released several times in quick succession. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, please enjoy O Holy Night, performed by my dear personal friend, and co-leader of our praise and worship team,” Isaac began. 

You heard your name being called, snapping you out of the haze. 

The audience applauded. Isaac gestured to the doorway opposite you, where he assumed you would be entering from. 

Taking a deep breath, you opened the door and walked to the center of the stage. Isaac turned when he heard the doors open, looking caught off-guard for a moment, but he recovered quickly, gesturing to you and clapping to signal to the audience that they should keep their applause going. 

He slowly backed away and gave you a double thumbs-up before exiting the stage. 

Recognizing you were still holding the program Darian had handed you, you clasped your hands behind your back and stepped up to the microphone. 

The soft piano intro played out over the loud speakers. You closed your eyes and inhaled deeply. 

O holy night,  

The stars are brightly shining,  

It is the night of our dear savior’s birth.  

The first note came out shaky. You’d pushed too hard with your diaphragm, allowing more air than was needed to pass through your vocal folds. You closed your eyes and focused on breath control, feeling the spotlight heat your skin. 

Long lay the world 

In sin and error pining  

‘till He appeared and the soul felt its worth.  

Back in the late 1843, a church in the south of France had its organ renovated. After the renovations were complete, the church reached out to a French poet by the name of Placide Cappeau, asking him to write a poem that could be used as a hymn. In response, Cappeau penned the first iteration of O Holy Night.  

Placide Cappeau was a known atheist.  

A thrill of hope. The weary world rejoices  

When the Catholic Church got wind of an atheist creating a Christmas carol, they did their best to bury the song. They claimed it lacked musical flavor. At the time, the idea of all men and women owning souls was highly radical. 

For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.  

O Holy Night has since become one of the most popular Christmas carols known to western society, thanks in part to John Sullivan Dwight translating it to English in 1855. 

You knew this, because you’d written a history of the carol for an end-of-semester project back when you went to high school at Calvary Baptist. 

Fall on your knees. O hear the angel voices,  

At the time, you’d wondered how an atheist—someone who, in your mind, stood against everything you stood for, could write such a beautiful song that touched the hearts of you and so many others. 

O night, divine. O night, when Christ was born.  

How could someone with no connection to God write something that so clearly captures the essence of the Holy Spirit?

You chanced a look out at the crowd, once more searching for the familiar face you so wanted to see. The atheist who understood more about Christ’s love than so many in the church ever would, and found no sign of him. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, preparing for the high note that signaled the climax of the song. 

O night, O holy night. 

Your voice rang out, loud and with a pleasing vibrato you’d finally learned to control three years ago. You paused for effect. The music cut out, and you sang the last line. 

O night divine!  

It was over. You’d done it. The piano melody came back in for the closing notes, and you curtseyed elegantly as the crowd applauded. 

You exited through the same doors you entered, heading straight for the restroom so you could take a moment to yourself before you had to be back on stage in the choir for O Come All Ye Faithful.  

Placing your program on the sink counter, you ran your hands under cool water, intending to splash some on your face when a small blurb on the bottom of the pamphlet caught your eye. 

Collection plates will be passed around. Please help us save countless unborn lives by making a donation. 

Unborn lives. 

Isaac was donating the proceeds to a pro-life organization. 

You’d been unknowingly roped in to an anti-choice fundraiser. 

A wave of anger erupted from deep within you, washing over your entire body and pulsating through it. 

You snatched the program from the counter, storming out the bathroom, across the foyer, and to the adjacent hallway Isaac stood at the end of. 

“What the Hell, Isaac!?” you near-shouted, bounding toward him. 

Isaac’s eyes widened upon your approach. He took several steps back, running into two of the other choir members, but it wasn’t enough. You slammed the program into his sternum. 

“Whoa!” he said, grasping the program you’d thrust at him with one hand and holding the other out to keep you from coming any closer. “Where’s the fire?” 

“What is this?!” you said, stabbing the program on his chest with your finger where the blurb appeared. 

He looked at you bewildered, then down to where your index finger pushed into his chest, and then back to you like you were a mad woman. “We said we wanted to give the proceeds to charity.” 

“Yeah,” you said, ripping the program out of his hand and throwing it down at his feet. “Like a soup kitchen or a toy drive. Not to Life Alliance!” 

Isaac’s eyebrows pulled together in blatant confusion. “What’s better than saving innocent lives?” he said. 

“Oh my God,” you scoffed, not caring whether or not it counted as taking the Lord’s name in vain. 

 Suddenly all the air in the room felt like it had been vacuumed out and you found yourself struggling to breathe. 

Taking a step backwards, it dawned on you that this was your limit. The church had compressed you your entire life, and you’d finally reached your breaking point. “I can’t participate in this.” You said it not to Isaac, but to yourself. “I have to go.” 

“Hey! Hold on,” Isaac said. “You can’t leave. You’re our first soprano. We need you for the high G.” 

You shook your head, turning on your heel. You wouldn’t have been able to hit that note even if you wanted to with how your throat was constricting. 

“We can talk about this. Maybe we can do more than one charity,” he said, but you were already halfway down the hall, tears threatening to spill over. 

The heels you wore made it hard to run down the icy sidewalk, but run you did. Down the sidewalk, down the street. You didn’t stop running until you’d put several blocks between you and the church. 

You’d once thought of it as a sacred place—a home away from home. 

Now, the only time you felt at home in it was on Saturday mornings, sharing the space with two delinquents who didn’t even believe in God. 

Nowhere felt sacred anymore. 

Nowhere except the shed in the backyard of Jolly’s house. But you were cut off from that now, too. 

Where did you belong now?  __________ How are we all feeling after that? Also, if anyone has any artistic skills and would like to help me make a moldboard or a banner or something for this story, I would be forever grateful!

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All Of Our Foolish Notions

noah sebastian x reader

content warnings: angst and cheating

word count - 1.7k

an ~ the beginning is heavily based off my personal life and something i've gone through recently so this was my way of letting go

The world felt like it was collapsing on you. A dream couldn’t have possibly led to this. no way. You couldn’t believe it. 

Maybe it was a little strange to go through someone’s phone over a dream but you couldn’t help it. The dream was too realistic and caused you to worry for a couple days before getting the bravery to check. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise because you had certain doubts about Sam and reading the messages just confirmed them.

I miss you, Kali

I miss you too, Sam.

How could he say that to her? Why would he say that to her? He always said she treated him so badly yet he’s putting in the effort to talk to her? Anger and betrayal ran hot through your veins but you couldn’t help but look further and sadly found more. Just what you wanted to see. An intimate video that was definitely not of you two and the date/timestamp was a couple months ago and just a day before your one year anniversary.

You quietly put his phone back down, carefully not to wake him up and just stared at him. It felt like a bigger slap in the face that he was sleeping so peacefully while you felt like your heart was being ripped apart. Choking back the sobs felt like pure hell but you didn’t want him to see you like this because it’s not like he would even care.

The energy to even stand up couldn’t process in your head so you crawled back to your side of the room and grabbed your phone, quietly crawling to the bathroom and locking the door. You only knew one person who could help you out in this situation and maybe it wasn’t the best to call another man but he was your best friend.

“Hey, are you okay? it’s 1 am.” His voice was too relaxing to hear though you felt bad because he sounded groggy.

“He’s been cheating on me. with his ex of all fuckin people, Noah.” Saying it felt like a bigger punch in the gut. 

“Hold on, what?” He said more clearly and wiping the tiredness from him.

“I-I had a dream the other night, i guess my subconscious trying to tell me something so i started to overthink but i didn’t ask because i didn’t want to start an argument and tonight i finally broke. I know i shouldn’t have but i went through his phone and saw-“ a painful sob left you, “he literally filmed them having sex just a day before our one year anniversary.” 

“I’m gonna fuckin kill -“ “No, please just help me get out of here. He’s not even awake. I just want to leave.” Begging him made you feel so small but you couldn’t help it. 

“I’ll be there soon.” 

“Thank you.”

-

When Noah arrived, it made you feel a little better though it still all felt like a big blur packing your things quickly, quietly and carefully to not wake up Sam. Maybe it was the power he had over you but you felt guilty, just leaving and not even leaving a message, note or anything. Just the key to his apartment on the coffee table and walking away from someone you spent a year of your life with. 

“This is stupid to ask but are you okay?” Noah asked as you tossed your bags into his car and you couldn’t help but chuckle weakly.

“I just feel really fuckin stupid. It doesn’t help this situation but i had already caught him in two lies about her before i found this out and i just made excuses for him. I thought the last time was the final straw but clearly not. The worst part is somehow i feel like i deserve this.” You confessed and could feel the anger rise again. 

“No, you fuckin don’t. Don’t ever say some stupid shit like that again. He’s an insecure stupid little prick who doesn’t even know that he just lost the best person ever.” Maybe he let his feelings out a bit but he couldn’t help it. He couldn’t stand the fact that you genuinely believed you deserved to get cheated on and treated like garbage.

“Let’s just go back to yours before i go back in there and punch him.” Saying as you headed to the passenger side.

Even while having your heart broken, you let your anger get the best of you and Noah couldn’t stop his heart from beating faster. He always thought it was cute.

-

The amount of crying you did exhausted you to the point you didn’t even feel Noah carrying you to his bed and tucking you in.

“Don’t leave me.” you mumbled to him.

“Just wanted to make sure you’re comfortable first.” He tells you as he crawls into the bed, you automatically cling onto him and let out a sigh of calmness. 

“I love you so much and thank you.” He shouldn’t have taken it too seriously but he couldn’t help it. It was killing him that you were going through this pain but he didn’t want to make it worse by confessing to you and messing with your mind/feelings more. 

“If only you knew.” You swore you heard him say but decided to not say anything and just fall asleep.

-

Getting back on your feet again wasn’t the hard part of getting over your last relationship, the hard part was realizing your feelings for Noah. You didn’t want to admit it though because you don’t want to make him feel like a rebound or taking advantage of him. You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself if he thought about himself that way.

Drinking wasn’t the right choice but you were so overwhelmed that you didn’t know what else to do and honestly, you didn’t mean to get too drunk either. You just wanted to stop thinking about everything so you could calm down though maybe going out with the whole group wasn’t helpful. 

“Are you ever going to confess to him?” Folio’s voice broke your thought process.

You didn’t want to answer him at first, instead downing another shot of tequila. 

“I’m just scared.”

He scoffed at your response, “Of what? It’s clear that he loves you.”

Noah’s words replayed in your head from that night, “If only you knew.” and the memory made the alcohol hit ten times harder. 

“I don’t want him to think of himself as a rebound. He’s too special to me. I love him but i don’t want to hurt him.” You could tell you were slurring your words but he still acknowledged what you were trying to say.

With the alcohol hitting hard, you couldn’t even tell if Folio said anything else. All you could think about was Noah and everything you two had been through. Seeing his hardships from a young age, letting him stay with you when you two were teenagers and your family treating him like their own, going to his local shows with his old band, the fallout, seeing him mature and grow while forming bad omens, his past flings, his breakdowns, his decision to cut his hair short after so many years and seeing bad omens blow up with just pretend and all the success they received. 

It hit you hard. You were in love with him. Maybe you always had been but just refused to accept it. You were there for him through everything and he was always there for you. Why didn’t he ever confess?  was the main question in your mind.

“Where is he?” you asked Folio.

“Outside with Jolly.” Once he told you, you tried to quickly stand up but stumbled. “Let me help you out.”

Folio helped you through the crowd, guiding you out the door and the cool air sobering you up just a tiny bit. 

“NOAH!” yelling his name immediately got his attention and he rushed over. 

“Are you okay? Did some-“ “She’s fine. Just drunk.” Folio warned him and Noah sighed with relief. You tried to hug him but you just fell into his chest bursting out into a giggling fit as he held onto you so you wouldn’t bust your ass on the ground. 

“I’ll take her home and I’ll text you guys later.” He said guiding you to his car, buckling you in and making sure you’re comfortable. The ride was quiet until you finally spoke up.

“Why haven’t you confessed to me yet?” 

He felt like his heart genuinely stopped for a moment. His throat dried up, his face became red and his stomach started hurting.

“I don’t want to have this conversation when you’re drunk.” his voice was stern which caused you to whine.

“I was just-“”I will not have this conversation when you’re drunk.” To be honest, he shocked you with how stern he was again and decided to drop it until you woke up the next morning.

-

The raging hungover headache woke you up though the blinding sun wasn’t helping it and trying to remember the night hurt your head more. 

“Here.” Noah said startling you while holding some ibuprofen and a glass of water. Quickly downing both and thanking him.

“Why didn’t you ever confess to me?” You ask him finally sober. Seeing him squirm from the question surprised you. Did Folio lie to you? 

“I was just scared of you rejecting me and leaving.” he confessed avoiding your eyes.

“Noah,” your heart was feeling like it was going to explode, “It may have taken me a lot longer than you to realize my feelings but i do love you and i always have.”

“Really?” His timid voice made your heart hurt. 

“Absolutely.” you reached for his hand, it felt so clammy yet still so soft and kissed his hand softly, “I love you Noah.”

“I’ve always loved you and i always will. I love you, more than you will ever know.” He felt relief after so many years of hiding this secret from you. “Can i kiss you?”

You couldn’t help but chuckle, “Of course.”

Soft lips met yours, the kiss just felt right and like it was meant to be. You couldn’t help but feel bad for not realizing your feelings sooner than later and putting him through hell. 

When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against yours and cupped your cheeks as he asked, “Will you finally be mine?”

“Absolutely Noah.” 

title comes from Lucky Ones by LIGHTS

i mean camaraderie

noah sebastian x reader

content warning: smut, rough / harsh sex, belly bulge, size kink, fingering, noah is pretty much just a pleasure dom honestly

word count: 1.6k

MINORS DNI 18+

The loud sound of the front door being slammed let Noah know immediately you were in a bad mood. Must’ve been pretty bad he thought to himself and let out a sigh as he could hear you screaming into a pillow since the apartment walls were thin. 

He made his way to your bedroom door, knocking lightly and waited for an answer. The sound of your mumbling made him nervous but he just wanted to check on you and made sure you weren’t gonna destroy your vocal cords from screaming so much.

“WHAT?!” “Woah, what’s wrong?” He asks, raising his hands in defense and you immediately feel bad. “I’m sorry, the date was just-ugh.” you explained and he just chuckled.

“Was it really that bad?” You couldn’t help but start ranting about how the dude was a complete narcissist misogynistic asshole even though you tried so hard to deal with it to get a quick fuck. You didn’t even hesitate to complain about how badly you needed it because it was ovulation week and it was killing you.

“Are you serious?” he scoffed, “You went out with a complete stranger when i was here the whole time?”

He wasn’t wrong. Everyone could just smell the sexual tension between you two, even past boyfriends or girlfriends and hell, even flings could. It would be a lie if you denied ever thinking about him in that way but you always pushed those feelings aside so it would never be awkward. Fuck, why did he have to be so attractive? 

“You’re so fuckin lucky that i need dick so badly or else i’d turn you away.” You tell him as you grabbed him and pulled him into your room, slamming the door shut. Hopefully Jolly will come home late tonight. A rough kiss makes you moan softly, his large tattooed hand holds your face, and he tilts your head slightly trying to kiss you deeper as his tongue enters your mouth. Pushing him down on the bed, knees buckling as you sat on his lap and could feel him getting hard. 

“Damn,” he breaks away from the kiss, “You weren’t lying.” Whining at him as you kiss him again, Noah then gently tugs at your hair causing you to pull away and let out a sigh of pleasure. “So fuckin needy for my cock, aren’t you?” 

“Don’t start talking like that.” Breathlessly telling him, grinding on him to feel some type of friction. “Awww, why not?” his taunting didn’t help, tugging again while his other hand trailed under your dress. “ Because I’ll cum way sooner than I plan to.” You informed him and tugged at his hair causing him to hiss as his eyes closed from the pleasure. As much as he knew this probably didn’t mean much to you besides a quick fuck, he couldn’t help but think of it much deeper. Was it because he always felt something more for you or was it because of how fuckin cute you looked in that short red & black velvet dress?

Removing each of your hands from each other, you reached behind to unzip the dress and let it fall around your hips. Your mind is blank as he pushes you onto your bed, removing your clothes and pulls you into another kiss, softer but still passionate. Feeling his hands and fingers roam your body makes you shudder as he pulls away. Noah settled himself between your legs, running a finger along your slit and rubbing his thumb in circles on your clit. Hips and knees are buckling from just the tiniest bit of stimulation, both of you groaning at the sensation of his finger sinking into you and just taking in the feeling of his finger, thicker and longer than your own and reaching places you couldn’t. 

“Fucking hell, Noah.” your voice sounded like you were on the verge of crying. If you were already this fucked out from his finger how were you gonna be due to his dick? He rested his other hand on your right thigh and squeezed, trying to help you back down to earth but with him entering another finger didn’t help and it just caused you to go more light headed as he pumped them.

“Hey, don’t go dumb just yet.” Shivering as his hand touched your cheek, eyes fluttering open and kissing him. 

“Please just fuck me. I can’t stand this anymore.” Begging him as he pulled away and he lifted himself up to tug off his shirt. You couldn’t help yourself as you caressed his chest, lightly dragging a finger to trace some tattoos and the sight of his bulge making you whine.

As he removed his boxer, you weren’t expecting him to be so big. I mean you had thought it was but actually seeing it made you anxious. It was actually pretty and didn't look like a mushroom wearing a skin hat.

“You plan on using lube?” He laughed at your question. “I’m serious. You’re the biggest I’ll probably ever take or have.” 

“C’mon, I’ll fit.” You just scoffed. 

“Let’s test it real quick then. Get up here.” He shrugged then positioned himself between your legs and lined his size against your stomach. Right at your navel was his tip, precum dripping right in your belly button and it made you whimper again.

“Noah, I don’t know about this.” “How about this, just the tip and it’s up to you when you can take more?” It shouldn’t be surprising that he was being thoughtful but it made your heart swell with how understanding he was. “Deal.”

He gave you a quick peck before letting his spit fall directly on your hole, shivering at the feeling of the warmth and feeling his tip run through your folds, his tip slightly pushing into you and already feeling the pain. Digging your nails right into his forearm and you could feel yourself break his skin but you didn’t mean to, it’s not like you expected him to be this fuckin big. He just rested there while you did your best to relax and get used to the feeling.

“You know what?” You groaned out. 

“What?” He was worried you changed your mind about the whole thing.

“I’m probably gonna regret this but just go balls deep.” “Are you sure?” Absolutely not but it’s just better to get this pain over with.

“Yes please.” 

Just the feeling of him pushing himself just a little bit more in made you feel so like you were genuinely being split in half so when his pelvis met your own, your head fell back against the pillow and felt so full. 

“Are you still with me?” “Mhm, just please fuck me now.” The feeling of pleasure taking control over you again. 

“Whatever you want princess.” Not even looking at him, you could hear the smirk in his voice and you almost snapped back at him until he pushed your knees near your head and it caused you to literally scream. 

The way he angles his hips makes you feel the merciless rhythm,  deciding today was a good day to try and completely obliterate your cervix. You could feel the tears streaming down your cheeks, brain feeling so fuzzy and Noah clouded any thought you could form. He couldn’t help but feel proud of himself. The way you looked as you got fucked stupid made you look so beautiful. The way your hair was disheveled, face flushed, eyebrows furrowed with pleasure and the little whines of his name leaving your lips. His eyes trailed down your body, the little bump that would appear as he thrusted into you made him want to cum right then and there.

“Wanna feel something?” You nodded weakly. 

Feeling his hand guide yours to your belly and you could feel the bulge of his cock from inside of you.

“Noah.” is the only word you could whine and for some reason, that awoke something in him. He pulled out then flipped you over and slammed back into you, hips slamming into your ass at a bruising force and honestly thought you could feel him ever deeper than before. His moans sounded so guttural at first but as he got closer to finally cumming, he got so whiny and you couldn’t help but have a slight thought that he was so cute.

 “How can you still be so tight? Please tell me you’re close? I’m about to cum. Oh f-fuck,I’m gonna cum. Please cum first.” 

Hearing him whine made you clench around him tighter as you finally came, screaming and crying out his name.Noah then pulled out and flipped you onto your back again making you overstimulated as he leans down into the side of your neck,he slams into you one more time before his hips finally stutter and feel him paint your inside with his cum as he bites your neck harshly causing you to let out one final moan. 

Even with the cloudiness in your brain, you still felt Noah lift himself up, an audible pop could be heard as he slid his cock out of you and the stickiness of the mix of cum leaking out made you cringe just a bit.

“Don’t make that face.” His chest was heaving, “Honestly, it’s hot.”

You weakly chuckled at him,” You’re not wrong but i’m already sweaty as fuck so this just makes me feel gross. Also, you’re a fucking dumbass.”

“Hold up, I just gave you the best dick you could’ve ever imagined and you’re insulting me?”

“I am because I didn’t think you would actually cum in me. I told you during my ranting that I was ovulating!” You remind him as you lightly slapped him.

“You act like we can’t go get the morning after pill.” He tells you.

“I don’t think I can walk because of you. So get your ass moving.” Groaning as he stands up and pulls his boxers back on then gets dressed. “Fine but I expect some cuddles when I get back.” 

“Of course.” 

A/N - this took me over a day to finish because fuck walmart also if it's not clear, yeah jolly didn't come home.

by the way, i based the height of the reader on myself since i’m 4’10 but obviously this could go for any height since noah is 6’3

let me go or pull me closer

noah sebastian x reader

warning: cheating, breakup, angst, throwing things and yelling

word count: 1k

The loud ring of your alarm awoke you, rolling over to shut it off and suddenly felt the emptiness from Noah’s absence. The house was unusually quiet, so you knew they weren’t in the studio. As you sat up, you looked around the room and noticed that it looked exactly the same from last night. Did he not come home? Nothing too big was planned so it’s not like Bad Omens had rehearsals and they were relaxing from the studio since they achieved a lot yesterday. Maybe you were overthinking the whole thing. Maybe he went over to Ruffilo’s to do something. You decided to shake off the thoughts as you walked to the bathroom to start your daily routine.

Maybe you should’ve called out of work today. It was too hard to focus when all you could think about was where Noah was. It was near one in the afternoon but still nothing from him. You already sent a couple texts and called him twice on your lunch break but nothing. Even the rest weren’t answering back which was very strange because Jolly would always answer if you couldn’t get in touch with Noah immediately. The more the thought, the more you realized a couple things. 

He was attached to his phone a lot more than normal. Even with the new album on the way, he stayed glued to his phone. Always keeping it on him, never putting it down and never leaving it alone around you. You understood that he was a busy man, had friends that were famous or not, whether they were male or female, but it was a little strange that he would quickly answer when it was a certain name that would pop up. He never let the notification stay on the screen long enough for you to see the name but it was easy to recognize. It’s not like you meant to micro manage him, it just happened.

Then it hit you. 

-

It was near midnight when you finally heard their voices. Jolly, Jesse, Michael and Noah. Only bad thing was you could tell they were all drunk. You left your shared room, staring down at them from the second floor and could feel your heart breaking. Noah never drank after everything that happened in 2020, so to see him relapse so hard and not seeming to care about anything. 

“Looks like you're in trouble.” Jesse fails to whisper to Noah while pointing towards you and all he did was scoff at the sight.

“No, he’s not. Noah is a grown man and can do whatever he wants.” Saying as you turned from them. “He can also fuck whoever he wants because it’s not like he has a girlfriend waiting for him. Seems like Olivia is more important.”

“Who the fuck is Olivia?” Michael slurred and the sound of someone struggling up the stairs didn’t surprise you.

“It’s not what you think, babe.” Noah says barging into the shared room, running into the wall next to the door and trying to grab you. You couldn’t but scoff at him as you continued to pack up the rest of your things, the feeling of heartbreak and rage running through your veins and trying to ignore the feeling of bursting out into tears.

“How did you even find out?” 

“How long did you plan for this to go on before I found out?” Snapping back at him. “If you must know, I decided to go through your macbook while you were out doing whatever the fuck you were doing and never texted me back.”

“Why did you go through my things?” He asked anger, lacing his tone and the anger made you chuckle.

“Are you pissed off because I went through your things or are you mad that I found out?” Asking him while holding up your hands like you’re weighing out the pros and cons. “You’re mad about those things but not even trying to lie about fucking someone else?”

“No, because there’s no reason to lie. I understand why you’re mad. I didn’t even me-” “Don’t you dare finish that sentence, Noah. You meant to. If you truly loved or even fuckin cared for me, you wouldn’t have even ever had the slightest thought of ever cheating on me. I’ve spent the last five years doing everything I ever could for you. Helping you, supporting you, moving across the country with you, and doing so much more for what? To get spit in the face by you.”

“I’m sorry. I thought it wouldn’t-""How long Noah?” You cut him off again, he stays silent.

“How long? How long? How long?” Asking him continually and he finally broke down while covering his face with his hands. “Noah Sebastian you better fuckin tell me how long.”

“About a year.” Time felt like it stopped. “I never meant for it to happen. A mutual friend introduced us and I didn’t originally even have the thoughts in my head then the night after the Concrete Jungle tour ended and we had that get together. She kissed me.”

“And instead of telling me, you just decided to make me look stupid and continue it? I was with you that night! Not to mention, I was with you the whole tour because you asked me to come with you!” Anger finally took over you. You tore off the necklace he bought you while on that tour and threw it at him. Grabbing the pictures of you two off the bedside table and throwing them at him as well. Glass shattering as they hit the wall and Noah moving away to not step on it.

“Can we just talk about this?” He asked as he moved over to the bed to sit down and you had to stand in silence for a moment to collect your thoughts.

“Are you proud of yourself? Do you feel good about your decisions? You wanna sit and talk about this when we had that first night to talk about it. There’s nothing to talk about now. I’m done, Noah. I’m officially done.” Informing him as you grabbed your suitcases and headed towards the door.

“Please don’t leave.” He softly begs.

“You don’t need me, you have her.” You tell him as you leave.

AN - i didn't expect to post again so soon but this was idea was driving me crazy and it was so hard to make Noah a cheater.

tbh, i'm not too proud of this but hey, i tried and that's all i could do.

title comes from I Wait by Day6