Commuter Rail - Tumblr Posts

It should be sunny today, but the wildfire smoke is clogging the sky and my lungs. I feel like I should be able to reach up and wipe away the smoke in the air like dust off a dirty window.

Now approaching, says the automated voice on the train, and for once I almost dread getting off. The train, for all it’s failures, has some kind of air filter that does a number, at least, on the smell of burning. I get off anyway, and pass a man reading Crime and Punishment. I almost laugh. You can’t read that book in English. Or so says my Russian best friend. And so says high school me, drowning in the depression and consequence and the bitter regrets they forced upon us before we even were considered adults.

I walk up the platform, and maybe it’s just my imagination, but my eyes sting. Or maybe I’m just crying. Things rose and fell and burned and died before any of us were around to see it, but now we are. Now I am, and seeing things die just reminds me I’ll have to see so many other things to their grave, regardless of whether I got the chance to love them.