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Dean Thomas- The Space Between Us

Dean Thomas

Sixth Year at Hogwarts

After a long day of classes, dinner time had finally arrived. Having dropped off my books and parchments in my room, I made my way down to the Great Hall, eager to get some food in my stomach. Upon arriving, I scanned the Gryffindor table for Seamus and Dean, looking for the seats we usually occupied. Spotting one of my friends, I continued over and sat down across from him. Seamus looked up, and upon recognizing me, he gave a nod of acknowledgment before taking another bite of his meal.

— How was Herbology today? Did you have any luck with the Snargaluffs? — he asked after a few minutes, giving me a chance to get some food.

— No. Honestly, I think I’ve realized that I'm just not good at that subject, and that’s not going to change. — Seamus laughed mockingly, making me roll my eyes. — Anyway, where’s Dean? He was supposed to help me with an assignment after dinner. —

— I don’t know. — He shrugged, tossing a piece of almond into his mouth and catching it. — Probably in the dormitory, wallowing in his sorrows or something. Nothing new, really. —

— Did he fight with Ginny again? — I deduce within seconds, and Seamus nods, munching on another sugared almond. — Merlin... Never let me get into a toxic relationship like theirs. —

— I don’t think you have to worry about that as long as you’ve got your eyes on him. — He commented casually, causing me to look at him immediately, feeling a pang of discomfort. —

— Stop repeating that stupid thing. — I clenched my jaw, making him smile again. Seamus loved provoking these reactions from us for his own amusement. —

— Before I stop repeating it, you’ll have to accept what’s pretty obvious. Honestly, I’d rather have him with you than with Ginny. She’s great and all, but listening to the constant fights and complaints is getting old. Don’t you think? I say you’d make a perfect match. Don’t worry about the height difference; nothing we can’t fix. —

— Okay, Seamus, enough already. — I got up from the table with a complaint, quickly grabbing some portable food. — You can’t even let me eat in peace! —

— Oh, please, don’t be so dramatic. — He laughed even more, watching my actions. — Where are you going with all that food? Going to find Dean? — I rolled my eyes and flipped him off before turning my back and walking out of the Great Hall. — Tell him to enjoy his meal from me! —

I huffed at that last remark and continued on my way until I reached the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. After reciting the password, I walked in and stood there for a few seconds, debating whether to look for Dean or not. I hated that Seamus was right about my feelings for our best friend. I had tried to push them aside a million times, distance myself from him for a while, ignore the fact that he noticed someone else and that he hardly spent time with us anymore because he was chasing after Ginny Weasley. Yet all my efforts had been in vain, and here I was once more, setting aside my feelings to worry about Dean Thomas.

With a sigh, I continued up the stairs to the boys' dormitory. When I reached the door, I knocked a couple of times but got no response. I waited a few seconds and knocked again, but still, no one answered. I hesitated for a moment about whether to leave, but before doing so, I decided to open the door just a crack to make sure Dean wasn’t inside. I scanned the beds quickly and saw him sleeping in his bed, still in his uniform. I opened the door all the way, trying not to make any noise, and approached, placing the food I had brought on his bedside table. I wiped my hands and then took the blanket at the foot of the bed and covered him up. Once I had finished covering him, I took one last glance before turning to leave the room. However, I couldn’t do so, as I heard his groggy, sleepy voice calling out to me.

— (Y/N)... Is everything okay? What time is it? — I turned to see him sitting up in bed, yawning, and still covered with the blanket.

— Sorry... I came to bring you some food since you didn’t come down for dinner. Seamus said you’d probably be here. — He nodded, looking at the food and then at me.

— Thanks... You didn’t have to do that. Come, sit down. — He gestured with his head towards the bed, so I walked over and sat down beside him, leaning against the headboard. Dean reached for the two pieces of pumpkin pie and handed me one, which I accepted before taking a bite. He mimicked my action, and now that we were closer, I could see that his eyes were puffy as if he had been crying recently. I swallowed hard, feeling a tightness in my chest, but chose to remain silent for the next few minutes so we could eat in peace. When we finished, he took another piece of food while I hesitated about whether to speak or not. What was the right thing to say in a situation like this that hadn’t already been said?

— So... Are you okay? — Dean hesitated for a few seconds when he heard me speak, and I could feel his gaze on me. — It looks like you’ve been crying... I want to know if everything is alright. —

— Hmm. — He cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably, avoiding eye contact. — I’m fine, nothing to worry about... —

— Alright. — I sighed, looking up at the ceiling to diffuse some of the attention between us. Then I stayed silent for a few more minutes, unsure of how to articulate my thoughts. — Listen, Dean, if this is about Ginny again, then you should think carefully about what you’re doing... I know you like her a lot, and that’s understandable. But if you’re going to be fighting every week over trivial things, then maybe it’s not worth being in a relationship. Seamus and I believe... — My sentence was cut off by Dean asking me to be quiet.

— That won’t be a problem anymore. — He cleared his throat while running a hand through his curls. — Ginny and I broke up today. —

— Oh... —

— Yeah. — He sighed, rubbing his eyes repeatedly without looking at me. — I think I'm finally done. Everything I did was wrong. If I tried to help her, it was a problem; if I acted a certain way, it was also a problem. I’m tired of competing for Ginny’s attention. She never takes her eyes off Harry. It’s like I’m just there to get his attention when she feels like it or to fill the void Harry left in her life. I don’t want to be second, (Y/N)... —

— I’m glad you made that decision then. — I smiled faintly, though it ended up looking more like a grimace. I took his hand, intertwining it with mine and giving it a squeeze. I then rested my head against his neck, and within seconds, I felt his head resting on mine and his hand holding mine affectionately. — You deserve to be loved the same way you love others, Dean. Ginny is an amazing person, but she doesn’t seem to be the right one for you. And that’s okay. We’re young, and we’re supposed to go through heartbreak and disappointments. I know it hurts right now, I do, but in time it won’t matter. — Dean sighed, closing his eyes and taking his time to process the words I was saying.

— I don’t know what I’d do without your advice and your affection... You’re too good for me. — I laughed at that and pushed him away slightly.

— It’s not that big of a deal, Thomas. I’m your friend; that’s what friends are for. —

— I’m not exaggerating. — He smiled wryly and tousled my hair, causing me to complain. — And I hope whoever you like is someone who truly deserves you. Never settle for less than you deserve, (Y/N). —

— Whoever I like? — I frowned, fixing my hair back into place. — I don’t like anyone. Where did you get that idea? —

— Seamus. — He shrugged nonchalantly, making my eyes widen and causing me to cough in surprise. — Relax. — He laughed loudly, seeing my reaction, and placed a hand on my back to soothe me. — It’s not that big of a deal! —

— What else did Seamus say? Did he tell you who the person is? —

— No. — He squinted at me. — He just said that you had your eyes on someone and that this someone was apparently too stupid to realize. —

— Oh... — I sighed in relief, feeling color return to my face.

— So... Are you going to tell me who the blind idiot is who hasn’t noticed you yet? You know we can do something about it if you want. —

Oh, Dean... If only you knew that you are the idiot.

— No. I don’t need help because Seamus is just being silly. I only said a guy was cute, and he’s made a big deal out of it. — I rolled my eyes and started fidgeting with my hands nervously.

— Sure, whatever you say. — He raised an eyebrow, watching my nervous hand movements, and then stopped them by taking both of my hands in his. — Anyway, I’ll find a way to figure out who it is. Whether you like it or not. — He smiled. — And if they’re not worth it, I’ll scare them off. We don’t want bad prospects in your life. Learn from me. —

— Since when do you have the right to scare off my romantic interests or whatever you want to call them? — I raised an eyebrow, and he laughed even more, moving a bit closer until our foreheads were almost touching and our breaths mingled. Dean, what on earth are you doing?

— Since the day you decided to call me your best friend. — He leaned in and placed a soft kiss on the tip of my nose. The gentle contact sent a shiver down my spine and a sudden rush of warmth to my cheeks. y heart raced, and a mix of surprise and turmoil surging through me. Why on earth would he do something like that? Did he even know the impact his actions had on me after so many years of being by each other sides? — Now stay a bit longer with me; I could use a distraction. —

He pulled away from me as quickly as he had come, and I stayed where I was for a few seconds, not moving. Dean settled back onto the bed, propping a pillow behind his back, and gestured for me to lie down against his chest. I looked at him for a moment, took a deep breath, and then accepted his invitation, resting my head on his chest. I could feel his heartbeat and the warmth radiating from his body. As much as I tried to resist, I couldn’t help but wish that every day could be like this. Him and me against the world. Together, holding each other, expressing our affection even in silence where words were unnecessary.

But even as I basked in this fleeting sense of intimacy, a sharp pang of reality hit me. Was I setting myself up for heartbreak by letting this continue? The more I allowed myself to be close to him, the deeper I was digging my own emotional hole, one that would likely leave me bruised if he never saw me the way I hoped he would. And even though the affection wasn’t the kind shared by two people who loved each other romantically, I was content knowing that Dean Thomas cared for me and needed me in his life as much as I needed him in mine.