Dming Is Hard - Tumblr Posts

“video games have buffering”

one of the DMs I play with has, like, 70 slips of paper that say, “Loading,” with bits of random D&D mechanics advice (“partial cover grants +2 to AC”) that he slots onto his DM screen when he needs to look something up, assemble something, or think up a mechanic for player bullshit.

I drew a picture of the wonderful Dungeons&Dragons-team that I have been GM'ing for. They consist of a human sorcerer, an elven monk and a samsaren oracle. I have the most amazing players :')

my players are annoying

I am currently running a D&D campaign at fifth level in the abyss. And the party members find themselves in the 88th layer. They, after a bit of time in the town I added to the world so they didn't just go around stabbing things the entirety of the session, decide to attempt to assassinate the demogorgon(the one from dnd not the stranger thing version) while it is sleeping, and they heard that the demogorgon sleeps for like a day or two every week, and that was today. Turns out, that was some of the demogorgon's minions who cast disguise self because the demogorgon was bored, and doesn't sleep, the party goes there and sees the demogorgon obviously not awake, the demogorgon yells as a free action at his minions who are hiding behind them. The doors shut and the party rolls initiative. The player(who notably was not actually invited to the campaign) rolls a 22 initiative and decides his first order of business is to try to intimidate the demogorgon. He says something along the lines of the ligma balls joke and I am done with him. in response the demogorgon intimidates him, royally pissed off, I roll a nat 20, he rolls a nat 1. He shits his pants, i'm pretty annoyed, so the minions take him out of the room. What is left is a pile of shit on the floor. I decide, because this session is already a shitshow, to make the room poorly ventilated as a joke. Next in turn order casts fireball. demogorgon passes save, taking half damage. Because this is a poorly ventilated room I make everyone make a con saving throw (dc10). Now, important to not that the demogorgon has 3 legendary actions that allow him to reroll a failed save or skill check. half of the party fails. the demogorgon, proceeds to roll a 5(+3=8), uses first legendary action, and gets a 2, then a second, a 6, then a third, a 4. the demogorgon PASSES OUT and I lose my shit.

i hate dming for my gayass homosexual friends. they are roleplaying sex right now. i am making them roll for things. what is my life.

happened again. what the fuck

i hate dming for my gayass homosexual friends. they are roleplaying sex right now. i am making them roll for things. what is my life.