I Want To Be A Writer - Tumblr Posts
This is such a cute idea i love it <3
GUYS i’ve got an idea we should reblog nd show pictures of the most recently saved pins. here’s mine !!
I don’t know if anyone will read this but I really need to get it off my chest because arcane has been making me really emotional for about the past week and a half, especially with Vi’s story and arc. I feel more seen by an animated character than I have by another person in my life (this seems to be a recurring theme with me). I’ve been trying to work through a lot of my past this last year and this show hit on a lot of it and made me emotional in a cathartic way. I’ve been Vi. I’ve made mistakes and in trying to fix them and help my younger siblings I’ve sometimes made it worse. Vi tries to reach out to Powder in episode nine and accidentally triggers her. I’ve done that. I’ve hurt my sister more when trying to help. When Jinx says that Silco didn’t make Jinx but that it was Vi I understood that because I’d been told something to that extent by my younger sister. I’ve heard the words “You try so hard to fix things but all you do sometimes is make them worse” and those words have hurt me for a long time and I’ve never seen an older sister go through a struggle so eerily similar as Vi does with Jinx. I had to watch my sister spiral while I tried my best to reach out and I failed because I didn’t fully understand that the way I was trying to reach out wasn’t what was best for her and what she needed. I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that while I tried my hardest to protect my youngest sibling I wasn’t able to succeed on many occasions. I have had my emotions in the spur of the moment of pain and loss cause me to lash out at my younger siblings and come to regret it immediately. I’ve been the older sibling that is responsible for their younger siblings in the absence of a parental figure that does what they are supposed to do (my parents weren’t dead but there was a point where they just stopped being parents). I’ve had the thoughts of being there for my siblings be the thing that kept me moving forward some days when things got really hard.
Being the oldest sibling is a hard thing to be. I know I felt responsible for them and wanted to protect them at every turn. I wanted to make things better for them in any way I could. The sad reality is that you can’t always succeed but I always tried to get back up and keep going. And seeing that exact same thing from Vi and those exact same feelings portrayed so accurately brought a catharsis. I always felt isolated in a way because of these struggles and tried to make sure no one could see that these struggles were effecting me. And seeing those struggles onscreen made me realize I wasn’t so alone in it and that my feelings of hurt were okay. Seeing Vi continually get back up after everything made me emotional because I knew how hard that was. It can feel impossible sometimes. Vi’s ability to get back up and keep trying for a better life for those around her just made me so emotional and made me hopeful too. I wasn’t expecting to be hit so hard by the writing for Vi’s character but it’s effected me for long after I finished the show.
One day I want to be able to be a part of making stories that can help make other people feel seen and less alone in their struggles like animation so often does for me.
“What is love?” you ask me and I say “Love is what I see every time that I look into your eyes and I get lost in them”
Im sorry, I had to write it somewhere