Im Literally Going Insane - Tumblr Posts

TW: A BIT OF BLOOD AND S/H SCARS

Blood 😋

Charaters used:

•Stichy: made by meh

Some of Stichy info:

He is 28, He has Bronchitis (cuz i love to torture my charaters 😍) and more shit, but the bronchitis is the one represented here because he coughs blood (I did a 1 hour Google search, if I'm wrong I'll cry), he is a bear, killer for fun, has depression (u can see on the scars) has one cat (called Cafu)

I swear if this doesn't get the same attention my Undertale posts get i'll go insane 😍

Idk if i hate this or like

What if I like… stopped doing art 👀

What if I finally gave up drawing… ✍️

don't we just love calculus?

WHAT WHIT THIS ART YO

THE TINY MIKEY ONE ALREADY MADE ME BAWL NOW THIS??!!!!&::@:&:& IM FUCKING DRY

AHHHHHH‼️‼️‼️Absolutely gorgeous‼️‼️ Hongjoong just doing this to be a little shit, him knowing flower languages and liking a signature phrase🫠🫠🫠love this so much

ooh ooh ooh! If it is not too much... can I ask for a headcanon for "Secret Admirer: What would they do as a secret admirer" for a member of ateez? Have a good day hehe <3

(~Sky, on anon <3)

see but if you give me the freedom to pick a member, i'm gonna make us both delulu about it. joong it is.

Kim Hongjoong: Secret Admirer

fulfilled as part of my 150(ish) followers event.

PAIRING: hongjoong x gn!reader TAGS/WARNINGS: none! GENRE: headcanon, fluff/romance RATING: G WORD COUNT: 630 masterlist | join my taglist | buy me a coffee?

✵ this is like a game to him

✵ he’s passionate, he goes for what he wants and he gets it done, so if he’s being a secret admirer instead of just asking you out, it’s because he wants to have fun with it

✵ he has a signature, right from the start; the same phrase is always somewhere on the packages he sends you, along with a swipe of whatever nail polish is currently on his finger

✵ so you’ll only figure it out if you pay enough attention

✵ whether or not you notice his little detail, you do pay enough attention to notice that the delivery guy is always the same

✵ it doesn’t matter if it’s bakery treats, flowers, a stuffed animal, or a new bottle of perfume/cologne; the same boba eyes and sheepish smile always peek out at you

✵ i think he’d only do this with someone he’s known for a while bc he’d need to know all of your favorites. he isn’t going to halfass this and be basic about it

✵ although, if he doesn’t know you well enough to know your favorite flower, the victorian flower language will always come to his rescue

✵ truly don’t think you ever receive a rose from this man unless he’s handing it to you himself

✵ the first bouquet he sends you is an arrangement of pink, red and white carnations (representing fascination) and baby’s breath (innocence). the white (pure love/faithfulness) and pink (i’ll never forget you) dominate the spread, with a maximum of three red carnations to hint at his own passionate nature.

✵ he’ll also send you gardenias (secret love) if he catches wind of you being particularly frustrated with his games, just to tease you

✵ he also starts growing pansies (thoughtfulness) so if you’re having a rough week he can just drop by your desk/home/workplace and leave it for you with your favorite sweets

✵ morning glories (love in vain/affection) for if he’s feeling particularly dramatic and scorned

✵ it all seems random to you, but the amount of work this man is putting in behind the scenes is actually insane

✵ forget the lore binder, he has a you binder

✵ he’s ordering things weeks in advance, talking you out of buying things he’s already bought you, etc

✵ at one point the next book in a series you’ve been reading shows up the day after you’ve finished its prequel and you’re mildly concerned

✵ it’s 4d chess in this man’s brain trying to win you over

✵ if/when you finally start to figure it out, he’s completely oblivious

✵ seonghwa has to tell him, bc you cornered the poor man after the latest delivery and asked him outright if your admirer was hongjoong

✵ he didn’t know what to say and scurried off without a word, so you knew

✵ he does freak out about it a little bit, bc he got a little too caught up in the game and forgot there was, in fact, a goal

✵ a few days later, seonghwa delivers you a handwritten note with the first word of his signature phrase on it to you and the first clue to a city-wide scavenger hunt

✵ at the second to last stop, you get the link to a playlist of songs that remind him of you

✵ by the end, hwa’s laden with bags from the gifts hongjoong never got to give you

✵ and once you get there, hongjoong is waiting for you at your favorite shop/cafe/park with your beverage and sweet of choice in front of him, a blue hyacinth (constancy) and a red rose in hand

✵ he had a whole speech planned but he’s too overwhelmed and just grinning, so all he gets out before you’re wrapping him up in your arms is

✵ “i hope you’re not disappointed”

TAGLISTS: permanent [open]: @justhere4kpop @tastymintchocolate @soul-jae @ad0rechuu @seonghwaddict ateez [open]: @pyeonghongrie-main @thatonenoona

banners again from @cafekitsune

© July 2023 nebulousbrainsoup | all rights reserved. do not copy, repost or translate my work.

(x)

˙✧˖ ?! — THE GOOD GIRL, I TRAINED YOU TO BE. - MDNI !!!

— ‧₊˚ — 🎱: " good pets keep their promises, don't they??"

summary. sending your husband a video of you touching yourself while he's at work was a horrible idea, now you got his tired ass all railed up and he's determinded to make you understand his definition of a good girl.

note. i'd bark for him anytime and everyday, hit me up cheol PLSS GOD I AM NOT YOUR STRONGEST SOLDIER where is my self respect :/

warnings/includes. (NSFW) dom! non idol! seungcheol x fem! sub! reader, 'puppy, pet, cum dump, slut, plaything' mentioned, giving head (m), big dick cheol cause ofc, cheol softens up at the end a lil, the nasty but good stuff rly

you were a fool.

a fool for having to set up that phone camera right in front of your pussy, moaning like a little bitch extra loud, just for him.

in defence of yourself: you didn't intend to make him mad, you just had to show him that he was the only person that could make you cum several times just by sole thoughts.

you usally weren't like this, you were calm and collected, you could control yourself when horny, you were good at following his little silent rules but not this time.

gulping slightly at the sight of him leaning down onto the kitchen counter, the veins in his big hands visable, his work jacket carelessly thrown onto one of the chairs, beginning to slip onto the floor as cheol took in a deep breath, like trying to regain himself.

with a voice that dripped of authority, he spoke, his words cutting through the charged atmosphere, "You've been a disobedient little pet, haven't you?"

through only his words you felt yourself clench around nothing, pure air, the urge to shift closer to him to sit down on his lap onto his thick thighs and grind onto his hard dick, your dick was overbearing but you once again swallowed it down. you didn't know what to respond, you needed his attention it was almost pathetic - but not responding could resolve into an additional punishment of its own.

seungcheols words hang in the air after a few more seconds of silence, for the first time he turned around, raising an eyebrow at your behavior, "no answer?" his tongue visably running over his teeth, "on your knees"

doing what he asked for: you looked up to him, almost innocently, lips a bit parted, eyes wider doe like, the ones he likes the most.

'playing the innocent little thing, are we?' His voice was laced with subtle amusement, a tiny hint of indulgence. 'but I see right through you.'

"i missed you," you paused, "needed you, just wanted to show you how much"

'your needs are inconsequential, pet,' his tone, though stern, carried a faint undertone of recognition, acknowledging the unspoken words.

you couldn't hide the subtle pout that formed at his dismissive words, a flash of defiance coupled with a yearning for god knows what. "needed to show you," you reiterated weakly.

but much to your disappointment his demeanor remained unwavering, the faintest trace of a smile playing on his lips—a mixture of amusement and determination. 'your need for validation and attention won't change the rules, puppy,' his voice, firm yet still a bit amused, putting on that stupid grin that made you want to rip out your hair.

apropos hair - his fingers careesed yours slowly, others would call it gentle maybe even reassuring..but you knew that he did this just to remind you of your position: his puppy, pet, cum dump, plaything really anything but always underneath him.

"you know what a good pet does? you know what you promised me last time? last time when you were on your knees for hours, begging and begging and pleading like a slut to let you cum- do you remember what you promised?" his tone mocking maybe even a hint of anger, his hand pausing the brushing through your hair.

"i promised..." the words trailed off, your gaze fixed on the floor, unable to meet his piercing eyes, "promised to be good, to listen to you always" your head lowering even further.

"and good pets keep their promises, don't they?" his eyes never leaving your figure kneeling in front of him, lifting your chin so you were forced to look at him, "do you want me to give you one last chance to redaim yourself?"

cheols own hands now leaving your face with every word wandering to his hardened bulge, knowing damn well that your eyes followed his hands with every single movement as he stroked over it through the clothing, "you could just show me that you still remember how to be a good girl, the one i trained you to be"

you bit your under lip, it couldn't be simple like this - with seungcheol, there was always some cruel catch like a play on words that you maybe didn't catch which he'll later on meanly use against you or he'll just plainly use the fact that you had a dead needy brain in the moment to his adventage but after all if he had a bad, hard day - he appreciates good head regardless, you knew of own experience with him.

he pulls of his pants and boxers, leisurely like he had all the time in the world like you weren't squirming at the sight of his pre cum coated cock, you didn't need to be told twice as you took the offer he gave you, for once not caring to much about what one of his twisted ideas might be, wrapping your mouth around the tip immediately running your lips around it, the salty and familar taste of his pre cum on your tongue.

the sound wet and sloppy, echoing across the kitchen, cheols fingers going through your hair, pulling it slightly when you tease him just a tad bit to much, guiding your head onto him in a way that leads to the base hitting the back of your throat as you gag in response.

"you're like my personal little cock sucker," pushing his hips forward slightly, actually deep fucking your throat "fuck, s'good at it"

"who taught you like this?" your own moan muffeled against his skin as he lifts up your head, his cock covered in even more pre-cum and spit, "answer"

"you, only do this with you" he nods in satisfaction at your pressed out words as you get back to what you did, stimulating him as well as you could, "good girl, just like that" throwing his own head back, a groan leaving his mouth, "see? you still know how to be one, don't you?"

"wanna come all over your pretty face, down your wet throat," a small whimper escaping him which turns into a louder moan, "use your tongue, spell your fuckin' name on it"

you try your best to take all of him in, almost chocking once more as he pushes his hips forward again, spilling hot cum all over your tongue.

that one lazy grin plays on his face when he sees you swallow his release, "just like that, clean it up" cheols hands again running over your head, careesing over your ears gently in contrast to his words and general presence while you lick him clean.

"good girl, did such a good job" cupping your face tightly, lifting up your head, kissing you deeply, tasting his own cum on your tongue.

"don't get me going while at work, got it?" you nod repeatedly, his fingers still squishing your cheeks, "words, baby"

"promise," a small smile on his face, when in the end you both knew that you'll pull the same shit like in a week just for fun, just to piss him off.

Sketch dump

over & over resident evil animation

yt link

If I don't get Raf I'll eat my phone

Summoning circles for the hunters pulling on 𝑊𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟 𝐼𝑛 𝑊𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟. Good luck~! ✨✨✨✨

Who will you wish for?

me : omg i love this character sm i could talk about them all day if i could

me talking about said character : hes just so like hes just hes i hes so i cant i mean you know ? hes like but you know like, hes so cool and like

I'm currently obsessed with ride the cyclone so take my silly little picrews with my silly little headcanons :]

I'd like to pretend that they are all the hot friend :]

"I want to go home"

a statement embedded in my mind

"but not there"

always following right behind

not to trembling hands without a reason

not to breaths that feel like treason

it's not the fault of anyone

but train tracks and itchy seats are more home

than the so called one of mine

so i buy tickets costing more than my life

homesickness twisting in my throat like a knife

and i search for it everywhere i go

from any trails of me i try to forgo

hope waiting for me just out of town

knows i will never let her down

• never ending motion - zero (me)

Doodle. YAYAYYA-

I also found one of my old artworks.......

maybe for txt or ateez but BELIEVE ME you're doing so FUCKING WELL on skz that in the 6 years of my appearance as a STAY I've almost never seen something like your fanfics about them! I also have a channel on YouTube where I post skz fanfics and kpop edits go check my account to find the post where I talk about it if you want more info. <333 @jinzkss

GUYS SHOULD I START DOING WORK FOR OTHER GROUPS TOO??

GURL SOOBIN IS MY BIAS AND I JUST WENT AHHHHHHHHHHHH A WHILE AGO RKDNRJCJRVDOEN

TXT REACTION

Showering together

Yeonjun:

He was hugging you as the water fall on you two, he caress your wait hair and kiss your forehead "You're beautiful" He say as one of his hands grab your waist and the others caress your cheek, looking into your eyes. He looks at your lips and back at your eyes. As he see you nod, he kiss your lips as his hand on your waist go down on your thighs

Soobin:

You was the one who asked to shower together, he accepted wanting to spend time with you. When you go in the shower with him, you smile and hug him, pressing your body against his. He let out a whimper "Don't do that" he says and you do it again, his bulge press against your body. He groan and make you kneel in front of him "Go on now, if you're so desperate please me and maybe you'll get something back

Beomgyu:

When he see you come in the shower as he was already there, his cheeks turns red "What are you doing here?" He asks as you don't answer back, you come to him and look at him. He blush "Love?" You still don't answer and you put your hands on his thighs, rubbing them slowly. He sigh and say "You're needy right? Maybe if you behave well I can please you"

Taehyun:

After you saw him going in the bathroom and hearing the water, you quickly take off your clothes and decided to join taehyun. As you come in the shower, taehyun look at you surprised, he didn't excepted you to come. You come closer to him as taehyun wrap one arm around your waist and press your body against his, he then lean for a kiss as he other hand start rubbing your inner thighs

Huening Kai:

He was literally so happy when you accept to take a shower with him, it was the first time seeing your your body and he keep compliments you. As you notice Kai looking at you while your washing your body, you quickly cover yourself filling embarrassed. He takes your hands and hold it. "You're amazing babe" He says and takes your face in his hands, kissing your lips

I DONT KNOW THEM TOO WELL HOPE YOU LIKE THIS❤️

Okay I'm definitely screaming and gurl I GET YOU. I'll be waiting for the jeongin smut and for the other request I made. I love yaaaa soooo muchhhhh mwah @minhosimthings

I NEED JEONGIN HELP- OKAY I JUST WANT TO REQUEST A JEONGIN SMUT YOU CAN CHOOSE THE PLOT AND A SKZ REACTION "you say I hate you in an argument" WHAT WOULD THEY SAY AND HOW WOULD THEY REACT AHHHH I'M GOING CRAZY (the one can be smut the second can be agnst. Sorry if I ask for a lot if you can't do them it's fine just remember I love you mwah) <333

i swear i've been so horny for that mf lately AND ITS ALL HIS FAULT *glares at hallucination*

ALRIGHT I DO HAVE AN INNIE SMUT COMING UP WHICH I'LL BE POSTING IN A COUPLE OF DAYS

ooh that would be an interesting thing to write Im gonna add it to my wips!!!

I WANT THIS AS MY FIRST TATTOO😭😭🗣️🗣️🔥🔥

Its been a little hard to draw bc my arm is still healing but I had to make a little something for Metadad Monday ofc ✨✨

(I got a tattoo on my drawing hand recently which is whats healing- its a struggle to draw but hey it at least looks really good 💜 ofc I had to get MK hes so important to meee)

A Lighthouse and a Void

A literary analysis of how the song Mine/Yours by Wilbur Soot and C!Beeduo interact

⚠️Trigger warnings: Unhealthy relationship dynamics, mentions of alcoholism, and implied mistreatment of spouse bordering on abuse⚠️

Word count: 2338

Why must I feel numb?

Tubbo has worked so hard to cultivate a life for himself that he enjoys, and yet still feels unsatisfied. Although he surrounds himself with people he should relish the company of and peace and prosperity and animals that used to make him happy, he continues to feel like he needs more. Like there is something missing. Like he is numb.

I’ve done what I’ve done.

Both Ranboo and Tubbo have done things they are not proud of, that eat away at their conscience no matter how much they try to convince themselves otherwise. Ranboo and George’s house, Tubbo’s traitorous actions during times of war. They both feel like they have turned their backs on Tommy, Ranboo is constantly lost and conflicted. To try and gain some peace, they both pretend as though the past doesn’t bother them. What is done is done, and they shouldn’t dwell on it.

I’ve taken the cues on what I’m supposed to do.

Ranboo is very confused during social interactions, prioritizing their own values over the unwritten rules of communication. Though they try to bend said values in order to gain Tubbo’s favor and trust, having next to no one else to talk to, they are still lost on what to do. So, they look to Tubbo to give them cues on what they’re supposed to do, idolizing his ease in which he navigates conversations in an unhealthy way.

I heave the issue.

Tubbo attempts to ignore his issues, no matter how heavy or inconvenient it would be to do so. Hence, he heaves large issues away, trying to forget them. This not only causes him to bottle up feelings that influence his decisions from his brain’s shadows, but makes it hard for him to communicate said emotions to others.

The narrative’s doomed when I’m holding the pen throttling you.

Tubbo controls the story that Ranboo gets, as when Ranboo forgets something it is Tubbo that reminds him. Perhaps omitting his own mistakes, he paints himself in the best possible light for Ranboo. Thus, their relationship is doomed to fall apart and then come back together. Secondly, Ranboo also writes his own notes about Tubbo in his memory book. As Tubbo is dependent on Ranboo’s love, whatever Ranboo writes and thus whatever Ranboo feels towards Tubbo, greatly affects how Tubbo views himself and his worth.

You never liked me when drunk.

Taking after his father and enemy, Tubbo takes up drinking to escape his overwhelming emotions. This scares Ranboo, seeing as he relies on Tubbo so much and observing him being unpredictable and dangerous when his memory book tells him that this is unlike Tubbo is unsettling. Makes him question everything, and yet Tubbo knows he can do anything he wants and Ranboo won’t remember. This makes him do more and more minacious things.

I start to believe you never liked me at all and so I agree.

Both of them, on their own, come to the conclusion that the other doesn’t love them for who they are, but for what they can give to them. Tubbo treats Ranboo like a void to scream into, Ranboo treats Tubbo like a lighthouse to follow blindly. At the same time, they both have low self esteem and hate or are unsure of their own identities. This understanding that they hide from the other is one of the few things they have in common.

So I’ll say “fuck you” because I know if I don’t I’ll probably say something stupid and true.

Tubbo’s recklessness when it comes to Ranboo’s emotions is unsafe for the both of them. Confused with how he thinks he should feel and what he is actually feeling, there are long stretches of time when Tubbo refuses to give or receive affection. Whether it is because he feels betrayed by Ranboo, because he feels guilty, or because of some other reason we are not shown, he always seems to blame Ranboo. This is due to Tubbo’s view of Ranboo, as being a void to need near him rather than a full person in his own right.

Stand just out of reach of your fist.

What Tubbo doesn’t realize is that if he repeats an action enough times, Ranboo will begin to remember it. The same way Ranboo knew Tommy was a friend or that Philza was kind no matter how long it had been since they last saw each other, Ranboo slowly realizes that he is Tubbo’s scapegoat. Although fully aware that he is unsafe near Tubbo, he has nowhere else to go. Nowhere else he’s ever known. So, he stands just out of reach of his fist, but close enough to touch.

Take myself away.

After a while of everything festering, they both find things to keep themselves busy. Ranboo and The North, Tubbo and the nukes. The more time they spend apart, the longer their marriage will last. Even when they are together, mentally they are somewhere else. Thinking about Michael or revenge or experiments, they are never in the same place even when they are laying in the same bed.

The gangrenous limb.

Ranboo finds that Tubbo and the child they had together and the certainty that their life used to provide, no longer makes him content. He begins isolating himself, traveling longer, losing himself in his own thoughts and worries. It feels like his blood flow, his very heart and soul, has been cut off from him. He has to come to terms with the fact that the man he married and loved and devoted himself to is not who he once thought.

Dance around the subject, a figure of eight

Sitting across the dinner table, standing next to each other on the balcony, laying beside one another in their bed, they are losing the familiarity they once had. The final reason they could still feign love was their history together. Now, with Ranboo fearing that they will again fall into their cycle that takes advantage of his tragedy and Tubbo desperately trying to bring it back, they are simultaneously nowhere near the same page but reading the same unhealthy book.

Describe all the parts of me I’m yet to break.

Ranboo is scrambling to find any proof that Tubbo once loved him. Desperately trying to see if Tubbo knows his favorite flower, color. If he knows why Ranboo hates the nether but loves obsidian. He is holding onto hope that his version of Tubbo is real, just buried deep within his frosty exterior.

Count all the parts of me, I’m yet to break.

Tubbo, on the other hand, has continued to drown in his work. Telling himself that he is building the nukes to protect Ranboo, he is trying to convince a god he doesn’t believe in that he is not guilty. Maybe he did love Ranboo once. There must have been some moment, when they were truly happy. For that reason, he is yet to break from Ranboo and thus the last vice-like grip he has onto his past life.

Recount all the parts of me I’m yet to break you.

Both halves of this tragic coupling are desperately searching for love and companionship. They are sure that their relationship can be salvaged. And yet, even in this new found hope, they are not doing it for the other’s sake no matter how much they say otherwise. They both don’t know how to be happy without the other. They haven’t been happy in years but the last time they were, was when they were together. They try to safeguard the other’s feelings, because if the other breaks, they surely will too.

Kiss me like it was your job, so tender and carefully, teeth before tongue.

(I wanna be yours)

And yet, nothing changes. Tubbo continues to kiss Ranboo as though it is an obligation, not a privilege. Scared to lose him and scared to have him, Tubbo performs his duties to Ranboo as though reading a checklist as opposed to loving someone. He gives Ranboo everything he believes he needs except genuineness behind the actions. At the same time, Ranboo can’t let go. All Ranboo wants is to feel loved and wanted again, he screams to Tubbo with his lingering touches that he “wants to be yours”, more than he wants to be his own person. A long time ago, this would’ve been exactly what Tubbo wanted, but now he feels guilty whenever he uses Ranboo, preferring to be detached over the crushing blame of Ranboo’s scared eyes.

And not in the way that the romantics do.

He knows he needs more, but he doesn’t know how to say it. Tubbo never taught him that, and he relies on Tubbo for everything. Maybe Tubbo should have done them both a favor and never showed Ranboo what true happiness and love and peace felt like. They could’ve lived in bliss, one content with unhappiness and the other oblivious. And yet, unfortunately for the pair, there had been love there once.

With the grace of a workplace and child dispute.

(I wanna be yours)

When they kiss, Ranboo can see Tubbo check a duty off of his mental list while they used to lock eyes and only see each other. With Tubbo lost in work and Ranboo observing his mannerisms from the outside, he realizes that Tubbo uses the same vocabulary talking to his coworkers as he does to Ranboo, his husband. When asked about their situation through the way Ranboo ate and talked and slept, Tubbo avoided it with corporate professionalism. Even discussions about their real, alive child were coated in a tone one uses when discussing tasks they were assigned to do against their own will. And yet, there is this longing still, to fix what is broken because what else is there?

You know, I don’t need much more.

Ranboo has lived with Tubbo this whole time, and loved him under all his fear no matter what Tubbo threw at him. He would be content with the occasional hug or single apology. He doesn’t need much, but he does need more. He is rotting away like a corpse, so slowly, starved of anything worth living for for so long. He doesn’t know any other way but, god up in heaven, if Tubbo called out to him from the darkness where they lost themselves, he would follow it to the ends of the earth.

I want to be mine.

Keeping these discoveries from Tubbo, about who they are to each other, has finally allowed him to grow and nurture thoughts independent from Tubbo’s influence. This fascinating new discovery is enticing. He wants to know more about himself and who he really is. The idea of being his own person, thing, object; whatever he is, a part of him is curious. He mourns the loss of himself knowing that he can wish for something like this but it will never come to fruition.

Wanna be yours.

Ranboo will never let go of Tubbo. Above everything he could ever want for himself, he cherishes Tubbo like a priest cherishes a church. Cleaning and perfecting oneself in the hope that some greater thing you don’t understand will reach out and save you. He has only ever been Tubbo’s. He knows nothing else. Every thought that races through his head, every step his padded feet take, everything his mismatched eyes see, they all trace back to Tubbo. He wants. No, needs Tubbo more than words can do justice. Like a sunflower needs the sun, turning away from Tubbo is certain death. Death of love? Death of hope? Death of peace and contentment? Prosperity? Reciprocation? He doesn’t dare find out, and follows Tubbo out of the storm as though Tubbo is a lighthouse, knowing that the shards of rock at the dock will tear Ranboo to shreds. Anything to get a step closer to his only love.

You know, I don’t need much more.

Tubbo has gone through so much, he has begun to give up on everything that used to drive him. Anger, revenge, resentment, guilt, all lost to him. He feels weak and exhausted, he needs to feel loved. If only for a moment he could take all of his walls down and truly be seen and cared for by someone, he could finally slow down and rest. He has been running his whole life, he doesn’t think it will ever stop. But, just the thought of giving himself up to vulnerability is enough to make him sick to his stomach. His fear jolts him like an adrenaline rush, and he keeps pushing knowing that he doesn’t need much to let go of the marathon.

I want to be mine.

Tubbo has always been on his own, he wants to hold on to this sacred privilege. In a world where he has been thrown around by one war to the next, one dictator to the next, one ungrateful friend to the next, he has always found comfort in knowing exactly who he is. Knowing exactly what he wants to do, what he needs. He is the opposite of Ranboo, never able to let go of himself in order to hold someone else.

Wanna be yours.

And yet, even with how much his individuality means to him, Tubbo is still chasing after that famed intimacy called romantic love. He wants warm fireplaces and bright blushing and the ache from smiling too hard and the bruising of lips being kissed with passion. He feels an overwhelming responsibility for his own lack of love, because it is true. Even with love laying next to him with open arms, he cannot take its hand. He wants to be Ranboo’s, he wants to be someone’s. Is it because he needs to be cared for or because the thought of missing out on something so close is eating at him? The idea that he lost a happy ending because of his own selfishness plagues him at night, when he wants nothing more than to be hugged.

I take you for granted because the alternative is far more alarming.

What is a moon, but a reflection of the light from a sun?

What is a sun, with no moon to shine upon?

Orbiting but never touching, without the other they are nothing.

How are people so good and drawing Sonic and Co? I thought it wouldn’t be that difficult but it totally is 😭