Incorrect It Quotes - Tumblr Posts

3 years ago

Richie: oh shit, it’s a girl I dated while I was pretending to be straight. What if she starts flirting with me?

Bill: Tell her you’re taken

Stanley: Tell her you’re gay

Eddie, jealous for no reason: Tell her she’s the reason you’re gay >:)


Tags :
10 months ago

Richie: We are gonna use impulse control, which is the practice of controlling one’s impulses.

Richie: For instance, I look down and see that roach there, and I tell myself, “I can’t eat that.”

Eddie: Do I need to slap you in the face?

Richie: Let’s focus.


Tags :

the losers club as things i saw, heard, or said in the past week

bill: what do you want to be in twenty years

ben: a library

—————

all seven, in unison: *chanting “kill it!” repeatedly with absolutely no explanation as to why*

—————

richie: i just *clenches fist in front of face dramatically* don’t want to

—————

eddie: i mean… that sounds pretty gay

richie: you sound pretty gay

mike: literally both of you are gay

eddie: wow we get it you’re straight

—————

stan: *drops pencil and stares at it* i fucking hate existing

—————

mike: *crying over a picture of a chicken wearing a hat*

—————

beverly, in response to the co-chairman of the committee calling her his assistant: we both know i’m in charge here, fuckin’ pussy

—————

bill: *makes eye contact with richie across the classroom*

richie, with no emotion on his face: *starts sliding his phone into his mouth*

bill, under his breath: what the fuck is wrong with you

—————

ben: i woke up in the middle of the night panicking about my sixteenth birthday

ben: it took fifteen minutes before i remembered that i’m already eighteen

—————

bill: i’m a lover, not a fighter

beverly: you punched me in the tit this morning

bill: well you shouldn’t have fucking touched my muffin

—————

eddie: good news, after some help from the teacher, i figured out how to solve the problem on my quiz

eddie: bad news, i needed help because i was so tired that i forgot how division works

—————

richie: does anything make you happy

stan: sometimes i think about going to your funeral

stan: never fails to make me smile

—————

mike: *starts playing flappy bird in class*

richie: WHAT THE FUCK IT’S 2018

—————

beverly: *shows up twenty minutes late wearing a panda onesie and holding a milkshake*

—————

all seven: *telling weird stories about their families*

mike: my dad wrestled a shark once

stan: explain

mike: he was on a boat

stan: that doesn’t help


Tags :

the losers club as things i saw, heard, or said in the past week, part two

ben: i thought everyone in this town was poor

richie: no, we all have crippling depression but some of us have jobs

—————

mike: i’m a supportive friend

stan: you said you would murder me if i didn’t study for my test

mike: …aggressively supportive

—————

beverly: i’m not saying i’m a god

beverly: i’m saying i’m a goddess

—————

bill: you ate an egg

richie: yes

bill: was it a cooked egg

richie: no

bill: was it out of the shell

richie: no

bill: how are you a living human being

—————

eddie, in tears: i forgot my bagel

—————

ben: did you know—

richie: probably not

—————

stan: so i was in algebra, right?

stan: and my teacher told us about imaginary numbers

stan: and if school is allowed to make us do math with FAKE NUMBERS

stan: then i should be allowed to murder them

—————

richie: hello my fellow heteros

eddie, holding his hand: stop doing that

—————

stan, at the school store: can i have two cookies and a reason to live

—————

ben: my mom asked me if i had any missing work and i panicked and said pretzel

ben: so now i’m grounded

—————

eddie, going through his backpack: i have three textbooks, pens, pencils, highlighters, erasers, extra paper, flash cards, my phone charger, and money for lunch

richie: i have a tub of chocolate frosting and a spoon

—————

bill: did you study for the test

mike: i was going to

mike: but then i found a compilation of dog vines so i never got around to it

—————

eddie: do you need a hug

beverly, wearing high heels with her sweatpants: don’t fucking talk to me


Tags :