Me Projecting - Tumblr Posts
cal having depersonalization-derealization disorder.
throughout zero day, we observe cal zoning out, hesitating, or not understanding certain places or things. in the final words and when they’re building the pipe bombs, he stares at the ground a lot. he seems as if he’s trying to ground himself, to make sure everything is real around him. when he’s making his own tapes, he has weird pauses between his words in unnatural places. he also struggles to understand the consequences of his actions and how to read certain events like in the poetry scene or how he acted before and after prom.
a very significant moment is right before zero day when andre tells cal he couldn’t have done this with anyone else. cal takes almost a minute to fully answer him and his eyes are transfixed on the gun he’s loading. he even messes up the wording. the entire time we see cal, it’s like he’s in a dream.
while these things by themselves don’t seem like much, they paint a picture when joined together. cal doesn’t see himself as a real human. he struggles with seeing other people and things as real. it’s part of what gives him the grandiose ideas that allowed him to plan for zero day. he mentions how people used to duel in the past and the “code of the samurai.” nothing he says is in relation to himself or to his surroundings.
cal thinks of himself as an entity, of something greater than matter and greater than gravity. he is something he can’t touch. he is something that can’t relate to the world around him. he is so detached that he cannot touch the ground.
Sk8 the infinity hcs.
-Reki’s childhood obsession was spider man. He loved it more than anybody in school and went through a phase where he would dress up as Spiderman for any special occasion. He still has the costume in the back of his closet.
-Langa was never much of a kid. He grew up pretty mature pretty quickly. This is actually one of the reasons his mum is worried about him. She thinks he tries to suppress his emotions so as not to cause her trouble. In a way she’s right(okay that got angsty sorry).
-Cherry hates Joe’s alter ego name. I mean fair enough, Joe isn’t the best.
-Shadow doesn’t actually only have a thing for managers, he has a thing for authoritative figures in general. He’ll come to this realization soon enough.
-Cherry has a cat and Joe hates it. So does Carla, she finds it extremely irritating as it’s always messing with her hardware. This is the one true connection Joe has to Carla, they both share a burning hatred for Cherry’s cat(okay tad unrealistic).
Miya bullies kids on Minecraft(canon tbh).
-Joe has on more than one occasion compared Cherry to the most lovely things in his life, while simultaneously making it seem like an insult. He’s a master in saying ‘I love you’ to his best friend and making it seem as though he doesn’t mean it. Cherry never catches on.
-Reki is also a master in saying ‘I love you’ to your best friend and making it seem as though you don’t mean it. Langa doesn’t really catch the sarcasm and ends up saying it back. Reki is left flustered.
-Ad*m suffers a supreme case of comp het. It started out as something to appease his aunts, but now he actually believes it to be true.
-Tadashi deserves better.