Mochizuki Honami - Tumblr Posts
aight
DreamEater x BACKSTAGE au once more
moving onto saki (beloved)
also just a heads up this one is a long one and idk how to make a readmore option on mobile F
it's also like 1:59 am
moving on, in sakis part of the story, her end is the layout for a chain of events that lead up to where they are now and tsukasa is the catalyst, what sparked that final moment and set things into motion.
sakis story follows the main event of Leo/Need, taking place right after the group is freshly reformed
of course there are a lot of fights still, and because of her illness, saki feels disheartened in more ways than one this time. not being able to help settle things with her friends, being too sick to even visit them, etc.
a lot is running through her mind during her time in the hospital and it all goes downhill even faster when another fight breaks out between ichika and shiho this time. the situation could've been easier to manage if honami was there but she had to stay behind that day.
the quarreling comes to a halt when saki begins crying, she's been crying almost the entire time but her sobs were masked by the arguments of the other two. this obviously gets them to stop and they start to hover over saki apologizing and attempting to calm her down but saki gets up and hides away in the hospital bathroom instead.
the two girls did try to get her out to talk to her but eventually visiting hours were closed and they headed out. after they left, saki started to give up and even regret her many attempts to get her old friends to come back together after finally seeing how difficult it is for them to get along at this point and time.
so she decided to stop and give up. she convinced herself that her efforts only hurt them more than helped them, and that was far what she originally intended. after she was released she called a meeting in the sekai and announced her resignation, leaving amidst their protests, mainly from ichika and shiho, and questions mixed with a request for an explanation of what happened from honami.
saki went home and never told tsukasa what happened until she saw him in the same state she was in
sad, wounded, and overall a far cry from who they were before the events that led up to their dreams being shattered and eaten up by a wound that was carved too far deep for comfort.
so she confronted tsukasa first, pestering him to tell her what's wrong until he did. and she told him too
and so they decided to make a song together
then another
then another
what they wanted was a way of coping with what they lost, they didn't expect their feelings to speak to thousands of people nor to get as popular as they did.
this was the start of the producers "BACKSTAGE", the first substructure and blueprint for what would be DreamEater x BACKSTAGE
PJSK CHARACTERS WATCHING THEIR S/O DIE OVER AND OVER
short desc: kinda like the madoka magica plot where homura becomes a traumatized war veteran because madoka always dies
type: bulleted hcs
characters: hinomori shizuku, mochizuki honami, kamishiro rui, shinonome ena, aoyagi toya
genre: slight angst
note: i wrote this on january 2023 and i dont remember anything so it probably sucks
@ hinomori shizuku
shizuku was completely exhausted, to say the least.
she couldn’t bear the feeling of losing you and having to start over every time. having to turn the both of you into strangers again. her loving you with all her heart, and you not even knowing who she is.
even shiho, who’s not the closest to her sister, notices her sudden mood drop, yet, uncertain of what could be troubling her, she decides not to ask.
whenever shizuku sees you for the ‘first time’ again, she wishes she could tell you what to do to avoid your death, but she couldn’t — that would only make things worse, and she’s very well aware of that.
as much as it pains her, she can only do small things to try to change the future, for now.
“I promise you, one day, it’ll be over. And when that day comes, I can finally spend my so-desired time with you.”
@ mochizuki honami
what was honami doing wrong?
she did everything, everything, to avoid that terrible fate. but it couldn’t be helped — it would still happen, no matter how much she tried.
she gave her all, she devoted herself to saving you. she was trying her best, her all, to keep you safe and alive. apparently, it wasn’t good enough. it was never good enough. every time, you’d end up dying in her arms. over and over.
whenever she sees you for the ‘first time’, she feels her heart ache. knowing that she’ll have to go through everything again and again, only for a false image of hope that maybe, maybe she could save you.
she never had the chance to tell you the words she was dying to say. even in your last moments, she couldn’t bring herself to say it. ever since the first tragedy, you’ve never heard the words ‘I love you’ from her ever again.
“Once I can finally let my guard down, then I’ll allow myself to soften at your touch. I love you. Even if I’m not ready to say it, I hope you know that.”
@ kamishiro rui
as much as he wanted to, rui couldn’t give up. not yet. not until he saved you.
why him? why you? why you both had to be disturbed in such a manner?
in the beginning, he thought himself to be really lucky, to have the opportunity of being with you one more time. but as more time passed, he started to believe this was not a blessing — but instead a curse.
waking up, knowing that he’d try his all to save you but being aware that it all would go to waste, was extremely exhausting.
whenever he saw you for the ‘first time’, he could feel himself relaxing at the thought of being together with you again. having your hands run through his hair, having you laugh at his cringey pick-up lines... he yearned for that, even if he knew he couldn’t have it, at least not at that time.
he watched you die over and over. eventually, death was not a new concept to him. but every time, even knowing it wasn’t the first time and it wouldn’t be the last, watching your lifeless body always gave him a feeling of despair.
you always called him a genius, then, why? why couldn’t he come up with a brilliant plan, as you’d say, to save you? why couldn’t he save the one person who stood by him at all times?
“I want to be with you so bad, but still, I’m not able to keep you here long enough. What am I doing wrong, my love?”
@ shinonome ena
this wasn’t fair. this wasn’t fair at all. why did they have to take you — ena’s favorite person?
she’d give 110% of her to keep you, even knowing that she couldn’t be with you, knowing that you’d die again, she still chased after your life as if it’d be the last thing she’ll ever do.
sometimes, she couldn’t help but being irritated. if only she didn’t love you, this wouldn’t be happening to her. she was very well-aware that this was one selfish thought, but she thought about it every now and then. despite being mad, she could never say that she regretted loving you.
whenever she saw you for the ‘first time’, she knew it was important to keep her distance, for your safety. despite that, she glanced at you quite often, fighting the urge to go after you.
having to be emotionally distant from you frustrated her. she watched you talk to a lot of people throughout the day, knowing that she wouldn’t be one of them. after all, you were still her significant other, even if you didn’t know it.
“Why won’t you simply stay?! Damn it... I want you to be safe, be alive, be mine! And I’ll make sure it happens, even if it takes a hundred... no, a thousand times.”
@ aoyagi toya
the only thing toya wished for was for it to be over.
it was extremely tiring. he’d never do something that pains him, but he couldn’t give up on you just yet. even if he has to go through the same feeling of emptiness every time, he’s willing to do it, if it means saving you.
not only that, but even his bandmates notice his sudden lack of motivation. every time, akito confronted him about that, but he never answered. he couldn’t tell him the truth, he’d never believe it. it was awful to avoid his best friend, but he couldn’t help it, rescuing you was his top priority.
whenever he saw you for the ‘first time’, you merely looking at him already made his heart flutter, as if it were before the tragedy. he loved to see you so... lively. yet, he knew he shouldn’t let his guard down, as he was already aware of what would happen.
he tried his best to keep you away from danger, directly or indirectly, but none of his actions seemed to help. in the end, he always held your lifeless body, never having the chance to confess his undying love for you once more.
“I’ll do everything for things to go back as they used to be. Even if it takes thousands of times, I won’t give up, not until I make sure you’re safe.”
