My Life Is Not A Fanfiction Stop Trying - Tumblr Posts

guys i swear to god i almost fucking died

i got a notification from my instagram saying someone had requested to follow me and i was like ‘cool, i dont post anything but let’s look ‘em up’

but when i actually registered the name my heart dropped and i stopped breathing

my celebrity crush had requested to follow me

someone who had a shit ton of followers, but wasn’t following anyone had requested to follow me

I WAS NOT READY FOR THIS

literally my first thought was ‘my life is not a fanfiction. this isnt happening, it’s not real, this isnt real, fuck it better not be real’

but then i thought ‘what if this is real? what am i gonna do? im not pretty enough for this, shit what if they expect an actual conversation?! i’m not good at those! fuck it, im ignoring it. shit maybe i should block them?’

i didnt know what to do, i had to call in an expert

cue in my best friend who had as much experience in this as myself, meaning none

she was no help, i never mentioned my celebrity crush by name, i only gushed about them

during my talk with her i came to a decision

i had to delete instragram

i had to say goodbye to my cat memes, my dog memes, my funny comics and my 9 followers

it was time to say goodbye old friend

 so as my last farewell i went to their page to reflect on my decision one more time

and lo and behold

it was a motherfucking fan page or something dedicated to the group

i had never felt so goddamn relieved in my entire life