Needles Tw - Tumblr Posts
some doodles from school today
Tw: Needles, trauma talk(?), intense trypanophobia talk, panic attack(?), other stuff I probs forgot, suicide talk (minor)
Feel free to ignore if u r not interested this is just me venting and seeking other opinions-
I cannot stress enough how absolutely terrified I am of needles, like to the point were I start hyperventilating, crying and having a near panic attack. I am not sugar coating this.
Anything that has to do with needles instantly makes me feel pain in my arms, neck and thighs (phantom pain maybe?) I cannot tell you how many times I've cried in the course of a single day even thinking Abt needles.
I have to get a shot in 2-3 weeks. Guess what, I've cried four times ever since I was told that. Usually I have this mentality where everything's gonna happen eventually just get over it, but when it comes to this subject I'd rather kill myself than face whatever needles are thrown at me.
I was talking to my friend (it's only one friend for those who are confused) when I mentioned needles because I had just gotten the news, my friend who gets like multiple shots a month because of allergies during spring and summer was like "oh ya that's right" they were used to it.
When I told them I was scared they said it didn't even hurt and that I would be fine, trying to comfort me. Well you see, form my experiences and memories, needles have hurt like a fucking bitch. And I would do anything in my strength to stay as far away as possible from those fuckers if I could.
Now I told them as much and they recommended maybe talking to someone, but you see, I'm a prideful creature who doesn't like people see me cry and will do absolutely everything to make sure people don't see me do so.
So now I'm out here on tumblr asking u all if anyone has had similar experiences and has any ideas of how to beat the fear because I am in desperate need of some help over here.
Keep in mind despite being the confident friend I am shy in nature and talking to people and risk wasting their time makes me want to throw myself in a ditch. Also, I am absolutely inconsolable for like three hours before the shot and inconsolable during it to the point were people have had to delay the shot taking because of it. And hour after the shot, I am no longer crying, but I will most certainly start laughing like a fucking maniac and cry as well.
People always tell me that "it didn't even hurt that much" "see your fine" yes, yes it did fucking hurt, no, no I am not fucking fine. I will absolutely snap at anyone who says otherwise because what the fuck, I would rather cut myself than re-experience that shit.
Also know that I tense up without wanting to during the shots or blood taking and once lost consciousness when having my blood taken. Getting shots have given me both headaches for days and my whole body feels colder, I always end up looking half dead or half asleep. My body is either still as a statue or shaking like a lead in the wind right after.
Ok so maybe I do have problems-
Day two of my first dose of the vaccine baby!!! Arm is sore but so far I don’t feel too awful... Heads up though, if I can’t do much I might see about posting some headcanons, or finishing some in drafts..?
If I can’t find inspiration from the ones I have I’d maybe be curious to see more prompts..? 👀
I know I have a lot already I just like to have a lot of options when hopping between them-
Oogh the second vaccine is hitting I think...
in control
RUNS IN WITH MY SKETCHY ASS NEEDLES DESIGN HE WEARS FUZZY CLOTHES TO HIDE THE NEEDLES PERTRUDING FROM HIS BODY
I picture needles as looking really fluffy until you touch them and realize that they are actually covered in needles
BEHOLD! Cesar's mother in Dreamdela!!