Rin Itoshi Angst - Tumblr Posts

What if:.. I noticed that most BLLK characters are Called by their Last Names, but one Specifically Stood out: Rin. I have a feeling that Rin requested Ego to not use his last name(?) since he doesn’t want to be overshadowed by his brother’s fame while he’s in blue lock. (Excluding reo)

HIII IT'S ME HRU OMG WAIT IM GONNA GO DM U ON DISCORD BUT BFR THAT

gut wrenching angst. rin. insecure rin. do it. PLEASEEEEE 😭😭😭

A/n:HELLO SANA!! I'M NOT SO GOOD BUT THANKS FOR ASKING, YOU?? ALSO ANGST RIN?? IS THAT HOW YOU ARE GONNA DIVORCE ME?? anyways i hope you like it<3

Warnings:angst (w/comfort); insecure Rin; established relationship

Genre:Angst (w/comfort) Type:one-shot

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'Was it really worth it?' 'What if i never make it?' 'What if Yoichi is actually better?' 'What if...' What if. Those were the thoughts running through Rin's mind right now. Did he often think about that? Yes. Does anyone know? No, well at least he didn't want anyone to know. But at the same time...

Ugh he couldn't keep up like this anymore. *Can you come over?* Was the texts you got from him. *Yeah, sure.* Rin is currently sitting with his legs crossed on his bed thinking and thinking and thinking...

What if things don't turn out the right way? What if Sae hates him forever? What if he fails to be become the best??? What if?? What if... "Breathe." He said to himself. He took a deep breath, bust still couldn't get these thoughts out of his head.

They just kept going. It was like he was having flashbacks. Was he all alone? Against everything and everyone? No. He had you- he thought and suddenly his eyes widened. What if you leave him? What if you think he can't be good enough? What if he isn't good enough?

This wasn't the first time he have these kind of thoughts. About soccer. But now it about you. You, who were with him all the time. You, who always spend your time with him. You, who supported him in everything at every moment. So what if he loses you know?? What will he do?? What if... He started panicking. His hands started to shake, his breathing got heavily. Oh no-

"Rin!!" You quickly shut the door, when you saw your boyfriend in that state. What was happening with him? He got up and walked up to as soon as he heard your voice. You were suddenly wrapped in his arms, that were still shaking. His head rested on your shoulder, he was squeezing you tightly.

As you putted your hands around him, still in shock of the situation, you heard him. Was he... crying? What happened? You knew Rin tho. Things should not be punched with him. He will tell you once he is calmed. "Let's sit on the bed, okay?" He nodded as you both sat and you took his hands, that were still a little shaking.

"Rin?" "Yes?" "Do you want to talk?" You asked hesitant. If he didn't want to, you wouldn't force him to, but how could you help him without knowing what's happening?

Rin took a deep breath and he started explaining the situation. All the times he had different thoughts, about everything that could happen, about soccer, his competition, Sae... How he didn't know what to do, how he was scared of what might happen. His voice was shaky as he spoke, eyes watery.

"Now the thoughts were even about you." Your eyes widened. "Me? But..." You would never hurt Rin, you would never leave him. And he knew it. "I can't control it. There are just some times i can't stop thinking about things." You suddenly pulled him into a hug. "Things like this would never happen, okay? I will always be here with you." "You promise?" "I promise."

He smiled as you kissed him. "Never hesitate to tell me when you think about this, okay?" Rin nodded and you smiled.

I don't know girly what do we think? @sanaexus

© mariaace 2024 pls do not copy, translate, steal or claim any of my works!

Reblogs are highly appreciated!

𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐄𝐆𝐎

↳ a foul-mouthed, aggressive, pro-soccer player on the verge of being disqualified from the biggest game of his life, is tossed into a fake relationship with a spoiled heiress to salvage their bad public reputation. what exactly could go wrong?

𖨆♡𖨆 itoshi rin x fem!reader

cw. mentions of alcohol, mentions of food, sexual tension, mean!rin, fake dating, language, suggestive content, reader wears makeup & does skincare, one slap, slow burn

masterlist | playlist

#2: LOVE ABUSER

That morning, you woke up on the soft bed, unsure how you had found yourself here. 

The last thing you remembered was Rin’s cruel words, and then you had sat on the sofa in a huff, fatigue overtaking you; where you fell into a quick slumber with your arms crossed tightly around your frame, and a frown etched on your face.

While you were still in your dress from the night before, your limbs and neck did not hurt, evident from the good sleep you had managed to get. Your phone on the nightstand chirped, and a notification popped up.

The production team is about half an hour away from your penthouse.

Your brows furrowed at Anri’s message, your foggy mind sifting through your commitments for today. 

It hit you the same moment Rin’s loud swearing reached your ears. 

“—the production team is coming today!” 

“—fuck, they’re on the way.” 

You both blinked at each other. Rin’s hand on the doorframe was curled into a fist, frustration on his pretty, sleep-warm face. He had barged into the bedroom at the right time, still in his dress shirt from yesterday, and looked a little worse for wear after his night on the unforgiving couch. Between your smudged makeup, his rumpled clothes and the animosity which existed between you two, there was a lot of work to do before the studio team arrived.

They were a production house hired by Ego to film you and Rin for a segment called Living With You—a popular reality show where the everyday lives of famous couples would be streamed for the world to see. Frankly, the thought of such invasive media made you uncomfortable, but it was the price to pay for being in a relationship with Itoshi Rin—albeit a fake one, of course.

You shared a look with him, one that said we’re fucked. Rin didn’t spare any time to think. 

“Get dressed. We have to clean the house before they arrive.”

It was the fastest shower you had taken in your life. Rin threw open the balcony doors and windows to let in fresh air, and sprayed a ton of Febreeze on the couch; conscious to pick up any evidence that he was spending nights separately from you. He kicked his blanket and pillows into the spare room, and once you were out of the shower, he brushed past you to clean himself up. 

It was your turn to wipe down the counters and sanitise the kitchen. Running a quick mop on the floors was a feat considering you were suffering from a hangover. 

The throbbing in your temples were aggravated by the sight of your shirtless “boyfriend” exiting the bathroom, water sticking to his abs and the ends of his dark hair damp. You tried hard not to stare at him, averting your gaze to the task at hand. Rin brushed past you, helping you clean up the dishes and storing them overhead, oblivious to you growing flustered from his close proximity and blatant half-nudity.

Stop staring at him! You bit your lip, focusing hard on removing a stubborn stain on the otherwise pristine marble. 

“Did you put on some makeup?” Rin demanded. Though the professional team would handle your appearance, you had to withhold a semblance of self-possession; judging from your disorderly countenance, they could tell you weren’t in the right train of mind. Your hair was sticking up in odd ends, and your face was too plain.

Shooting him a glare, you tossed the soiled cloth at his broad chest with a huff. “Fine. Make sure that spot is gone when I come back.”

You didn’t stop to assess his reaction, thundering towards the bedroom to make up your face and try to arrange the bed. Once your cheeks and lips were shining with health and you looked somewhat invigorated, unlike a corpse suffering from a hangover, you laid the duvet flat, fluffed up the pillows and yelled for Rin to put his shirt on.

His gruff protest reached you, and you rolled your eyes. Stupid, over-sized man child.

A knock on the door halted your frantic movements, and you sensed Rin freezing, too. The both of you were thrown into such an unprecedented scenario that neither of you knew what to do next. Another knock persisted.

Finally, it was you who unglued your limbs and rushed to the door, plastering on a smile. “Coming!”

The production crew were younger than you expected, and returned your tight smile with bows and quick introductions. They set up their equipment on the sidelines, while you were prepped by the makeup team. In keeping up with the homey-theme, you could not appear too glam and they chose a more natural finish for your skin which complemented Rin’s healthy glow. 

He was sullen when the stylists brushed his hair and primed his skin with a light layer of foundation, reminding you of a puppy that was forced to be sent to a pet groomer. 

The director arrived an hour later, holding a cup of coffee and an apology for his tardiness. 

He shook hands with Rin and gave you a low bow. Ego had sent a Blue Lock representative, the PR manager whose name you still did not know, and Anri herself. On your side, your father sent his assistant to make sure you were on your best behaviour.

The time to shoot was almost on you both, and before the cameras could roll, you were surprised when Rin pulled you into a corner. His sudden close proximity after last night’s tension laden confrontation made your stomach turn funny, and you tried to mimic his deadpan expression, a similar scowl on your face.

“What, Itoshi?” 

“I know you’re pissed off at me, but our reputations are hanging by a thread here.” He spoke in a low, deep whisper. You hated how it sent shocks of electricity up your spine, your skin prickling from every warm exhale caressing the nape of your neck; goosebumps rising from the closeness this sudden proximity forced you in less anyone else accidentally overheard the both of you plotting. “I need your help to cooperate, okay? I really want to go to the World Cup and Coach Ego will ban me if I get more bad press.”

The power you held to have the Itoshi Rin begging for you to work together with him. You bristled and frowned. Wasn’t it the exact same thing you had told him yesterday? His switch-ups were making you dizzy with whiplash. 

“Whatever.” 

Your callous response must’ve shocked him because a furrow appeared in between his brows. Hammering in your insolence, you pressed your palm flat on his chest and pushed him aside with a scoff.

“Wait—” Rin reached for your wrist and tugged you back into the alcove, his body pressed tightly to yours. You tried not to warm at how you were close enough for your chest to brush his defined one, those teal eyes boring down into your face with a glare of desperation. “You were… you were right.”

You could tell it took a lot from Itoshi Rin to admit his mistake judging from his gritted teeth and clenched jaw. “We have to be teammates. I… fuck. Help me and I’ll… help you.”

Rin trailed off, unsure if he was saying the right things.

He was such a ball of constipated emotions, you could not tell where his consternation started and his desperation ended. 

Deciding that it would be easier for you to accept his truce than to drag it on for the sake of today’s shoot, you reluctantly nodded.

“Fine.” Your voice was cold, remotely absent of the fondness you would hold for everyone around you, even for your distant and indifferent “boyfriend”. Rin’s furrowed brow deepened, and he was about to ask you if you were kidding when you squeezed past his tight grip and back into the living room.

Your expression did a complete change, and you grinned at Anri. “Is it time to shoot?” 

She glanced at the camera setup and nodded, a quick, eager bob of her head. “Almost. Are you and Itoshi-kun ready?”

Speak of the devil and he shall appear. You felt his arm wrap lightly around your waist and stiffened slightly. But, if Rin felt your sudden clamminess, he didn't comment on it, fixing Anri with a reserved stare. “We’re ready.”

The Blue Lock co-founder smiled fondly. “Remember to show some emotion, Itoshi-kun. It would be good for your ranking.”

Someone yelled action!, and the silent cameras started to roll.

The crux of Living With You was a show where couples would go about their daily lives and the cameras would follow them. Based on your knowledge from a few clips, it was sort of like a voyeuristic look into the world of the rich and famous—who just so happened to be in love with each other. 

Your stomach grumbled at a good time, and you padded over to the kitchen, humming lightly. Rin’s scene was scripted to start from the home gym where he would be doing a set of reps, designed to emphasise his intense dedication to soccer. On your end, you were the supportive, slightly exasperated significant other who prepared a meticulous breakfast for your boyfriend in the hopes he would pay attention to his health.  

You started out with some fresh fruits, chopping them up and blending strawberries, blueberries and kiwis together for a vitamin-C rich smoothie. Next, you got a handful of granola and placed them in a bowl topped with some yoghurt.

“Morning.”

Rin’s voice, scripted out to sound loving, greeted you and you turned to smile at him. His teal eyes were soft, expression hazy to show a man utterly in love with his girlfriend. 

“Morning,” you murmured, and handed him his breakfast. Despite the numerous people on set, you couldn’t help but rake your eyes up and down his bare body. You were sure the comments online later would catch this bit and gush at how you were checking out your “boyfriend’s” physique.

“Thank you for the food,” he murmured, and shot you a small smile.

You returned it with a nod and a grin. “You better eat up, Rinny. I have some repairs I need your help with.”

He pretended to grumble, sitting at the kitchen counter with his bowl of granola in hand. “You’re always making me work, woman. I want to rest.”

In retaliation for his sour retort, you stood on your tiptoes and pecked his cheek. “Don’t you go acting like Nagi now. Otherwise, Ego-san will have a handful with two lazy players.”

Rin glowered playfully and poked your side. “Fine. Let me handle that later.”

Thankfully, the streaming would take about half an hour for them to highlight important bits of the episode when Rin fixed a conveniently “broken” shower head, and then, you both would be taken away separately on a short confessional regarding this entire relationship to intersperse it with the final cut. 

Your turn came up soon, and when the interviewer sat you down, you suddenly felt too nervous. However, your expression schooled into a bright smile when the cameras started to roll.

“So, Y/N,” the man with a slicked back pompadour and heavy cologne asked. “How did you and Itoshi-san meet?” 

You pretended to look away shyly and avoid the camera’s lens. “Oh. Um. Wow—uh, okay. We met at a record shop and debated about Green Day for a bit. He had very, um, high standards for music, and I was trying to convince him that my taste in music wasn’t as bad as it seemed.” 

A pretend laugh, and the corners of the interviewer’s eyes crinkled in pleasant surprise. “I had no idea it would lead to him asking me out on a date and, well, here we are.”

“Aww.” You could just picture the other viewers cooing along with him. “That is so cute! What do you like the most about him—and remember, please keep it PG!”

You chuckled along with his innuendo and remained bashful. “Um, I really like how he—” you paused, suddenly coming up blank; the string of designated answers you were supposed to give eluding you. The red camera light flashed, waiting for your response. You cleared your throat. 

“I like how strong he is,” you finally confessed, and this time, it was not the repertoire of answers Ego and your father sanctioned for you to give. You were speaking from the depths of your heart. “Many people may see Rin-san as a cold, aloof man, but behind it all, he’s a person who has strong principles and goals. Sometimes, it may rub people the wrong way, but Rin doesn’t mean any harm. He wants what is best for himself and others around him, especially his Blue Lock team.” You ended your confessional with a short laugh. “I guess that’s what I like the most about him—his unwavering passion for the things he loves in his life.”

Your segment ended with a round of bows and expressed gratitude. You did not see Rin emerge from his own confessional, and you wondered what he would say about you. If he could even say anything about you. 

Anri took your arm and gave you a warm smile. “You did great. Your father told me to congratulate you.”

Your smile was paper thin and you nodded weakly. I just want to go back to bed.

Finally, Rin emerged from the guest bedroom where he had his segment, and the production house called it a wrap. The equipment was stowed away, the place cleaned and finally, you both had the apartment back to yourself.

Funnily enough, you and Rin both sagged onto the couch at the same time, exhausted from the unexpected ambush Ego and your father set on you two. He turned to face you, unexpectedly asking how your confessional went.

“Did you tell them the correct story of how we met?” 

You nodded, closing your eyes for a second. “Yup. The record store story.”

Rin paused. “Oh. I fibbed on the first date because I forgot what Ego said but I mentioned the second one. The—”

“Museum date,” you both said at the same time.

“Yup,” you murmured. “That’s fine. You’re a man, you’re allowed to forget stuff like this. They won’t crucify you for it.”

Evidently done with this awkward conversation, you stood up and stretched. “I want to go back to sleep. You do whatever you want to do.”

For the second time, Rin hesitated. You found you were growing intimately acquainted with his quirks at an alarming rate; first his eyes would glimmer with uncertainty, his brow would furrow and then his mouth parted as if he was about to ask a question.

You didn’t want to speak to him after what he said last night, and turned on your heel before he could say anything else to ruin your mood.

Despite your exhaustion, you could not fall back asleep. You tossed and turned while the morning sun streamed through the curtains, only to sit up at the smell of something tantalising from the kitchen. The last thing you expected was Rin to be cooking at the stove, in his simple shirt and shorts combo, the combination of sunlight and shadows bringing attention to his toned thighs.

You rubbed your eyes, smudging a little of the undereye concealer as a shuddering yawn overtook you. “What did you make?” 

He turned around and regarded you neutrally. “Katsu curry. I know it’s your favourite.”

How did he know? You never told him that. 

“It was in your profile,” he murmured curtly, answering your silent question. “Now, eat. You barely had anything yesterday.” 

Rin set a plate down in front of you, and you eyed it apprehensively. “Did you poison it?” 

His glare was back and he crossed his arms. The sight would’ve been more frightening if his tousled dark green hair was not sticking up at odd ends, evidence of him struggling to figure out how this high-tech kitchen operated. 

“No. And even if I did, I wouldn't waste poison on you. It probably cost a bomb. Now,” he scoffed. “Eat.” 

You picked up your chopsticks, grumbling bossy asshole under your breath. But, you thanked him for the meal and bit into the first scoop of rice and curry, surprised to find how good it was. You ate heartily, pausing to scrape the remaining curry from the plate and down it with your last scoop of rice. 

Rin let you wash up, and he was back on the sofa, reading a book. You paused, unsure if he wanted to be interrupted since he was staring intently at the pages. Curiosity won, and turned to fire off your question. “Aren’t you going to train today?”

“It’s Sunday,” he rebuked curtly. “The training centre is closed.”

Oh. You struggled to return back to your task, suddenly feeling foolish.

“Don’t you… don’t you have anything to do today?” 

Your repetitive motion of scrubbing the plates ceased, and you set the sponge back in its container. Was the Itoshi Rin actually trying to make conversation with you? 

“Nah,” you murmured after a beat of hesitation. “I’m going to chill today and do some skincare.”

“Oh.” Another drag of silence. “Can I do it with you?” 

This time, you did not hesitate to gape at him, soap suds clinging to your hands. “Uh. Why?” 

He pointed to his skin, as if it would give you the answer you needed. When you didn’t get it, he huffed in frustration. “Clogged pores,” Rin murmured. “Help me with it?” 

You supposed there was a first time for everything. Like how you were currently standing above Rin who was leaning his head back, two eye mask patches resting snuggly on his face and your jade roller gently de-puffing his cheeks and chin.

“I never understood what that shit did,” he grumbled, gesturing to your roller. You snorted and angled it to his neck, rolling it upwards to pull his skin taut. 

“It’s supposed to tighten your skin and drain your lymph nodes.”

“My what?” 

You sighed. “Men just don’t understand.”

Rin’s skin was surprisingly soft as you worked an exfoliating scrub on the planes of his face. “Don’t you have some expensive esthetician to help you with this,” it was your turn to grumble.

“It’s Sunday,” he growled, like it would give you an answer to your question. You snapped your mouth shut and continued to scrub his pores clean of any gunk.

When you were done, Rin checked his skin out in the grand bathroom’s mirror and nodded. 

“Nice. Thanks.”

“Welcome,” you mumbled and started on yourself. Rin remained seated on the plush makeup bench, watching you work without saying a word. You paused from scooping out your LaMer scrub and darted your eyes to him. “Anything else I missed?” 

He shrugged. “I want to take notes.” 

Such a weird dude. You didn’t question his strangeness and continued with your motions. Occasionally, Rin would glance at his phone, but his attention would return to you. How meticulous you were with your skin reminded him of how some of the guys had a strict pre-game ritual they always committed to.

It was strange to see this sort of diligence and dedication outside of the field.

“My job demands this,” you murmured, taking him quietly by surprise. How did you know exactly what he was thinking?

“I have to always look good for the camera no matter what so I cultivated this really strict skincare routine,” you said frankly. “It sucks, but I have to always be on top of my game.” You flickered your gaze momentarily to his broad and muscular frame. “I’m sure you understand what that dedication is like.”

Rin cleared his throat and nodded, unsure why your little motion of checking him out left his cheeks feeling a little too warm. It made him feel insecure, and he quickly stood up, backing out of the bathroom with a low mumble of gotta train.

You tried to ignore him and took your time in making yourself feel better through these little acts of selfcare. Despite this uneasy truce between you and him, you weren’t sure when the other shoe would drop; when he would revert back to his condescending mannerisms and scald you with his sharp tongue.

Time passed on and you were finally done, stepping out of the bathroom in time to run into one very sweaty and half-naked Rin.

“Wh—!” 

“Watch it,” he grumbled, steadying you. 

Ugh! You clapped your hands to your eyes, shrieking when the sight of his bulging abs and flexing biceps burned into your eyes. You stepped back from him, and shook your head from side to side as if to rid yourself of the image of his bare body seemingly ingrained on your lids. “Will it kill you to wear a shirt once in a while?!” 

“I’m at home.” You didn’t have to look at him to know he was scowling. Sometimes, you wondered if he had any other facial expressions besides those tinged in anger and insolence. “I don’t need to dress up.”

“You’re insufferable.” You peeled your hands away from your face to give him a mutinous glare. “I thought you made it clear you didn’t want to stay a single second here.” With me. 

Rin narrowed his teal eyes, his chest puffing with anger. “Huh? Why do you care?” 

Because you basically told me you didn’t like me yesterday. You bit your tongue before you could spill those incriminating words; they would have to send you to Guantanamo Bay to get that bit of information out of you. 

You would rather burn off your fingernails than admit to Itoshi Rin that you hated how he didn’t want to be your friend. This went against the laws of nature. Everyone in your life liked you; even if they found you ditzy and comically dense, you had people that genuinely cared for you. 

Unlike Rin. His bad manners and even worst temper got the better of you; made you think he hated you with his entire soul.

You stepped back and crossed your arms. “I don’t. I just thought you made it clear that you and I both can’t be friends.” 

Rin paused for a few short seconds and instead of apologising for what he said last night, his glare deepened. “Are you fucking expect me to say sorry? You started it. I was only being truthful.”

“You were being a dick.”

“A truthful one.” He mumbled, rolling his eyes. “Look. In what world can you and I be friends? I think not. We can be civil, but I sure as hell do not want to be your friend.”

The people–pleaser inside of you gasped in offence; the hurt rearing its ugly head. 

“Fine. I didn’t want to be your friend, either. You’re too blunt and mean, I can see why you don’t have anyone in the first place.”

You hadn’t expected such simple words to touch a nerve. Rin’s temper flared and he growled—actually growled—grabbing your arm and walking back into the opposite wall. He pressed you to the cool surface and his even cooler eyes bored into your wide ones. 

“Don’t you ever fucking shut up?” he demanded, nostrils flaring. “All you do is fucking whine and whine. Why don’t you get drunk and die in a ditch or something? It would make both our lives way easier.”

Your shoulders fell, and you didn’t expect his harsh words to elicit such hurt in your soul. The fog of anger clouding his mind parted slightly to give him snatches of his self-consciousness back, and he realised a second too late that your eyes were glimmering with tears.

“Hey—”

You pushed him aside roughly, dashing at your eyes. The emptiness in your soul throbbed, missing the shape of her—a mother you had little memories of because like what Rin said, she got drunk and died before you could even walk.

“Y/N—” he reached for your wrist and you let your temper take over, the loud sound of your palm meeting his cheek echoing in the silence of this penthouse. His face snapped to the side, cheek throbbing. Did she just fucking hit me—?

Rin’s teal eyes were narrowed slits, his teeth bared, but when it dawned on him that you were sobbing, that famed temper he was known for suddenly ebbed away, like water drying under a scorching sun. Your eyes were red-rimmed, and your chest was heaving up and down violently, holding back your cresting emotions and tears. 

“Fuck you, Itoshi.” 

Your hoarse whisper surprisingly made him hurt more than your slap, and before he could reach for you, to tell you he didn’t mean those words, you stormed away from him, shoving your arms into your hoodie and slamming the door shut behind you.

Itoshi Rin was a man who cared little for anyone around him.

His whole life was centred around games and goals and rising above high enough so it was Sae’s turn to look up at him. 

And in this instance, he wondered if this unhealthy single-mindedness was the right thing to nurture when he couldn’t even find the right words to name the sinking pit he felt in the middle of his chest. 

The same one which echoed in the shape of your absence. 

tagging: @chronic-claire-universe @simpfully-heartbroken

© all works belong to lalunanymph. do not copy, repost or claim as your own.

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╰┈➤ characters... .•`ITOSHI RIN´•.

˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ SYNOPSIS... you went to unimaginable depths for him. so giving him your body was not a big deal, until it totally broke you. now what should you do? ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ WORDCOUNT... 0,8k ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ WARNINGS... angst(tw), meantions of smut(act not described), nonbinary reader, slight cursing, one sided love, agedup! rin ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡ OTHER... reblogs, likes and requests are appreciated!

“what? me needing you?” he lifted one of his eyebrows. lips still pressed in a straight, thin line. “you must be dreaming, y/n.” were the words that banged through your brain all day and night. your eyes shot open, chest rising and falling at a fast pace. 

“fuck…” you cursed in a murmur. the thin fabric of your pajamas sticked to your chest from the cold sweat. still in a lying position, your arm landed on your right side. ‘cold sheets..’ you looked outside, the moon’s ray entered into your room dimly by the clouds covering it. 

after a sharp inhale then outhale, wiping away your tears before they could break their way on your face, the phone on the nightstand vibrated with messages. you turned over, checking it instantly. it was him. it was really rin this time.

“sorry for leaving so early. got things to do.” yeah. things.. his girlfriend probably missed her, it was better if he leaves anyway. you couldn’t get up. you didn’t want to see the traces of him all around in your bed. the mess he left you in. but you felt it. you still felt his filthy touch on your skin.

the obsession never got the best out of you. you fell. he didn’t. you loved. he didn’t. you wanted to be close to him. he tried to push you away. you couldn’t forget him. he couldn’t get rid of you because passion blinded you.

‘i got what i wanted, no? i did… then why am i so… so-’ you bit your lower lip, then continue remembering how you got here, in your bed, 3 a.m., seeing your thighs’ outline under the blankets. his scent got rubbed on you. how disgusting, yet sweet scent.

“don’t follow me. don’t come near me, y/n. you’re in the way of my career and life. i don’t need love.” ‘says the liar with a lover..’ you thought and gulped when he finally spoke to you. yes. he spoke to you, but these are not the words you were expecting nor you wanted to hear. he was your everything. not in a crazy shit way like pictures of him in your room, but it was hard to get him out of your head. then a regrettable idea popped into your head.

“if i can’t have your heart… can i have your body?” you looked determined. he scoffed. “you’re kidding-”

“i am not, rin.” a few seconds of silence passed. he frowned in disappointment. “i know that your girlfriend isn’t willing to do it with you.”

"don’t bring her up now." his tone got sharper. you flinched, it was almost like a blade.

"I understand.. that you don't want me like you want her but.. if we could try it.."

“..so you want me to..”

“yes. exactly.”

“but i don’t love you.” his lips curled into a snicker smile, like he could laugh at you, just because you were yearning for him and his touch. “you’re pathetic… okay.”

‘i don’t want to be used anymore’

‘but i will lose him…

‘he was never yours.’

your fingers tangled into your hair in frustration. you went through this almost every night when you were with him. you could do so much better but instead you’re having breakdown with his semen between your legs. his deep eyes gave you the hope every time, that one day… maybe one day, after breaking your heart countless times, your time will come. but why did you thought of something so stupid? you wanted his love. how? out of pity? but what if he doesn’t pity…

“don’t be stupid.“ after that night, determination settled into your mind. the cup filled and you got enough of all the ‘i don’t know her, what are you talking about?’ and ‘we’re just two strangers enjoying their life. nothing much and nothing less, you should get that into your brain. you’re not my first choice.” ‘i’m not his first choice..’ all your dignity got thrown out of the window and smashed into pieces. this time you realized, that the rin you got so much fond of was only a stupid image in your head and after time, you got attached to it. to his smell. to his skin. to his mesmerizing green locks and orbs. the way you imagined him smiling when looking at you. “why would i do that?”

“out of pity… maybe…” your throat were soar, the talking was hard, steam runned across your forehead, lips trembling, eyes avoiding his gaze.

“i thought you knew it.” he groaned.

“what?..”

“you’re truly despicable. ‘pity’? i don’t think so, it was more like… using you out.” you knew that. you knew that he wasn’t going to feel sorry for your stupid love for him. rin saw the potential sex partner in you. he was thinking with his dick. but this hit you like a car. so what’s now–

“what’s now? do you want to continue this or not?”

‘do i? will this ever change?’

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ 𓈈 ᵈᵒ ⁿᵒᵗ ᶜᵒᵖʸ, ᵐᵒᵈⁱᶠʸ ᵒʳ ᵘᵖˡᵒᵃᵈ ᵐʸ ʷᵒʳᵏ ᵃˢ ʸᵒᵘʳˢ!

HAIRCLIPS .ᐟ

cw: itoshi rin, fluff, gender neutral, established relationship, wc 300+

“doesn’t it bother you sometimes?”

“what exactly?”

“your hair. i've noticed you blowing it out of your face every now and then while you were performing the lotus earlier.”

rin cracks one eye open as he examines your expression, watercolor eyes searching for the tiniest hint indicating that you’re messing with him once more.

yet he’s met with nothing but pure curiosity as you scrutinize the olive bangs messily descending upon his face, concealing his pearly orbs like a veil, hiding them from your prying gaze.

“sometimes” he sighs before settling back into the yoga position he had been performing prior to your question.

with a silent hum you excuse yourself, leaving your lover to continue on with his exercises in tranquil silence.

the pitter patter of your hurried steps on the wooden tiles recures sooner than anticipated, accompanied by an exited chortle leaving your mouth as your hastened strides lead you over to him once more.

only as you flop down on the floor does he detect the metallic clinking sound of what he considers to be your jewelery box.

despite questioning your decision to put on your accessories in the living space rather than the bathroom, rin resolves to leave his eyes shut, deeming your presence rather soothing than a nuisance, expecting you to let him finish up his training without any disruption.

rin comes to the revelation that you enjoy messing with him even more than he already knew as he feels a cool metal sensation graze his forehead before the cover of his bangs gets lifted off his face by what he supposes to be one of your hairpins.

he's proven correct as you scoop one of the side pieces up with another pin, clipping it shut after fixating the small section on the side of his head.

"what are you doing?"

"helping you keep your bangs in place so they won't annoy you"

"and you had to use your pochacco clips to do that?"

"they look cute on you! besides.. they work don't they?"

"you're unendurable"

"but you love me"

"yeah.. i guess i tolerate you a little more than anyone else"

©️ rinsque — do not plagiarise nor repost anything on any other platform.

note. this is a repost from my former blog @/iohims