This Is Just Me Trying To Be Philosophical And Mysterious But Just Coming Off As An Ass - Tumblr Posts
↪ I don't post on social media much. I usually go through phases in which I'll post a few times a week, but anxiety about how I'm perceived will lead me to delete them later. I've always feared social interaction, but it's almost scarier interacting online than it is in person. People usually filter themselves in a real life setting, making sure everyone sees them in a certain way, usually a good one. Online however, we have walls we can hide behind. No need for a filter! Whenever I was an avid user of Twitter (It's funny how nobody calls it X) I saw a lot of people being blatantly nasty towards each other. It didn't matter what the post was about, someone always found something to argue about. Thankfully I never experienced any negativity directed towards myself, but I saw a lot of it underneath any post with more than 1000 likes. It really started to mess with my head. Eventually it would make its way over to my page. Are people really this mean when there are no consequences? Certainly not most people I'd like to think. After that I realized I was just on a really bad platform. I mean, I was constantly filling my head with negativity. So, I did the right thing and deactivated my Twitter account. It honestly feels really good to not have to worry about that account anymore. In all honesty I was only on Twitter to keep up appearances. The same goes for my old Instagram account which I also deleted for similar reasons. I did not have a lot of followers, nor did I make any meaningful posts, so it didn't hurt that much to deactivate.
↪ Now, I know I can't escape ALL negativity just by deleting some social media accounts. By limiting the amount of platforms I'm on and being cautious of the people and posts I'm interacting with though, I can at least remedy the situation. So why am I posting here? I basically just said I'm scared of being perceived and I hate social interaction. Really, I do want to be perceived, just by the right people. That's why I'm here. Tumblr (in my opinion) has always had a really great community surrounding it. You see, I've been on and off of Tumblr for most of my teenage years and adult life. Always deactivating but also always coming back. I think I always left because nobody I know is on Tumblr, but I also always came back because nobody I know is on Tumblr. I have a hard time being true to myself in front of people that know me. Here, though, nobody knows me. I'm gonna do and say what I want. This blog is really all about me being me whether or not people are watching.
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Anyway, this seems really dramatic but I'm not really expecting anyone to find this. I'm just spewing into the internet void.