Thomas Shelby X You - Tumblr Posts

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 | tommy shelby x reader › 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒏𝒆

when you read the biography of the shelby family you decide to travel back in time to help them and save the lives of several of them, but things get complicated when you start to have feelings for thomas shelby

word count: 4451

masterlist

content: fluff and emotions

warnings/info: mention of weapons, too many conversations, grace and thomas don't fall in love in this fic. it is adapted to the series but i changed several things. based on peaky blinders season one.

author note: english is not my first language, so forgive me if there are spelling mistakes

You walk with slow steps, you're terrified. You travelled to this place believing it would not be risky, but when you arrived in the city your veins filled with fear, and your courage fled like that woman you saw in the dark alley, fleeing from the man who tried to hurt her so cruelly.

The streets of Small Heath were more dangerous than the biography you read for weeks before travelling said, there were not only criminals, there were also people looking to do harm and steal what little hope was left in the palms of innocent people's hands. This city is like a dark hole, once you fall into it you will never get out.

You take a last deep breath and open the weathered wooden doors to enter the famous pub called Garrison. The eyes of several men sweep over your figure but you ignore them and begin to search your eyes for the only person you care about, and that person is Thomas Shelby, the leader of the Peaky Blinders, the horse enthusiast, the man who received two medals in the Great War, the reason you travelled to this town, your mission.

You approach the bar where a tall, thin man with a serious face and rather striking ears looks at you judging you with his dark brown eyes. Normally you were used to men disrespecting women but in this era women had no right or voice, they wouldn't mind hurting you if they had the chance, for them women were just a piece of meat to satisfy their "needs", just thinking about that idea makes you want to vomit. Finally you get up the courage to speak and clear your throat, trying to get the nerves out of your body: "I'm looking for Thomas Shelby" you say.

"A woman shouldn't be in this place," he replies in disgust, ignoring you completely. He goes back to his work, cleaning the bar and serving alcoholic drinks to the customers.

"Do you know where I can find him?" You ask again and this man ignores you again. About to speak again his eyes look behind you and grow wide with fear, he stands up straight and nods, formally greeting the person behind you.

"Why you looking for me?"

A low, husky voice sounds behind you, sending a shiver down the bones of your spine, you swallow your saliva nervously and turn to look at the person with the attractive voice. He wasn't as tall as his biography said, but his defensive stance made him intimidating, his piercing blue eyes mesmerised you and his strong, clenched jaw gave you goosebumps.

"When I ask a question I expect an answer." He speaks again but nothing comes out of your mouth. Thomas Shelby lets out a tired sigh and takes a cigarette out of his pocket and then points it at you: "Are you a whore?"

You open your mouth in offence, ready to reply rudely, but then you remember where you are and who is standing in front of you, calm yourself and take a deep breath, preparing to speak to Birmingham's most feared gangster: "No, I'm not a whore." His pale blue eyes look away from you to light his cigarette, but a few seconds later they focus on you again. "I'm looking for you because I have a message for you" You look around, all the men's eyes focus on the two of you, "I need to tell you in private" He raises an eyebrow and then cocks his head.

"Well, let's talk in private." Thomas Shelby turns to go to a small secluded room at the side of the bar, opens the door and gestures for you to enter first. Inside there is a table with whiskies and a couple of chairs around it, the sound of the door closing diverts your attention from your observation and you notice him move behind you until he is facing you again, he takes a puff on his cigarette and blows the smoke out, creating a haze between your faces. "If you're not a whore, what are you and what do you want?"

"I'm just a woman" You blink, "And I've come to give you a little message: the men you sent to do that robbery are too drunk, they'll get the wrong box and bring you a box of government weapons instead. I suggest you throw them in the canal and for nothing in the world hide them, otherwise your life will change completely and it will be the first step for misfortunes to come into your life like rats looking for scraps." When you finish speaking the gangster's eyes darken, and it is then that you fear for my life for the first time.

"Who the fuck are you and how do you know about that robbery, eh?"

"As I said before, I'm just a woman. Do as I say Thomas Shelby." You stride out of the Garrison, once in the small house you've been renting for over a month you let the bated breath out of your lungs and close the door. Your sweaty hands roam the furniture until you find the bottle of rum, uncork it and take a deep swig, praying that it will take effect and take the trembling out of your body. What you had done broke all the rules you had created for yourself, you couldn't tell the people you were trying to help what would happen in the future but you found it impossible not to, it's many years apart and this time you're not helping someone innocent, you're trying to change the life of a mobster. You took a risk by exposing your identity to Thomas Shelby, now you just had to wait and if he really listened to you, you could go back to your time, otherwise it would take more than a year and that's what you least wanted.

Your plan to have tea the morning after the events is interrupted when there is a light knock on the door, you leave the sugar on the side of the table and go to the door to open it, behind the door you meet the person you least expected to see on this cold, dark morning. His expression is serious but his eyes look confused.

"We need to talk and this time you'll tell me who you are."

Thomas Shelby enters the house without your permission, you stand stunned in the doorway watching the man light a cigarette and sit in one of the chairs as if nothing has happened. Taking one last look at the gangster you close the door and walk over to the table, also sitting down in a chair and preparing yourself for what is to come, as this mission will not be as easy as you had planned.

"I tried to do some research on you after you ran away from the Garrison." He speaks again and takes a deep drag on his cigarette "The people here don't know anything about you, nobody knows you and nobody knows for sure when you came to Birmingham. So I went to your house to get you to explain to me how the fuck you knew about my planned robbery and how you knew they'd get the wrong box and just like you said, now I've got government guns in my hands. You'd better speak up and tell the truth."

"If I tell you the truth you won't believe me" You say sincerely.

"Are you a witch?" He asks a second later.

"No. More like a seer." You lie to his face.

"A witch" He affirms his own question, staring at you.

"I just wanted to warn you about the guns to save you the trouble but I see it was in vain because you still keep them" You grab the cup of tea and drink from it, "Do you want tea?" You ask, you may be with the most feared mobster of the 1920's but you would never lose your kindness.

He gawks at you and shakes his head, "I'm not a tea man." Thomas Shelby lifts the cigarette to his thick lips for one last puff and then flicks it into the ashtray that happens to be on the table. "What's your name?"

Your eyes drop to the cup in your hands, your missions couldn't know your name, another of your rules. So you look for the first way out: "How do you know where I live?" You ask him another question and look him straight in the eye.

A small wry smile escapes his lips and he clasps both hands together on the table to bring his face close to yours. "You won't tell me your name, will you?" your lips part to answer him but you seal them again, "Fine, I'll find out just like I did with your home address." Thomas Shelby pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket and drops it on the table and then gets up from his seat and walks towards the door, "Are you any good with numbers?" He asks you and you look at him confused but end up nodding, "Today you will quit your job as a housewife and start working at my family's betting shop, there's the address" He points to the paper with his index finger "So when you have a vision for my life you can tell me before I make another...mistake" And without another word he walks out of the house, leaving you stunned in your chair. This shouldn't be happening.

You were making big mistakes, your main goal is to help or change the lives of the people you choose from the background, without having contact with them. But you also had to admit that all last month you got nothing out of being away from Thomas Shelby, maybe if you had approached him from the beginning the mistake of the guns wouldn't have happened, and you wouldn't be in this mess today.

For the next two hours you questioned whether you should really take this job or just abandon this mission and go back to your own time, you were about to lock yourself in the wardrobe to give it all up but then you remembered the tragic life of the Shelby family, you couldn't go back. Even if they didn't know it they needed your help, all the unjust deaths that were coming were breaking your heart in two, they deserved better and if you were the only person who could change their lives you would do it, even if in the process they would probably hate you or you would end up buried lifeless in the dirty mud of Birmingham. You put on a simple white shirt with a brown skirt and pick up the paper with the address of your next job, a few minutes later you arrive at the famous Shelby house on Watery Lane, you knock on the door but no one answers, you knock again and nothing.

"Nobody will open the door because no one is at home"

A woman's voice interrupts your action of knocking again on the black wooden door with a horseshoe nailed to it. Your head jerks in her direction and you can't help but recognise her, her snub nose and dark-as-night eyes are typical Polly Gray features. She takes a drag on her cigarette and looks you up and down, intimidating you to the bone.

"What do you want?" She asks.

You nervously fix your fringes "I think Thomas has given me a job."

She raises an eyebrow: "So you're that famous seer. He told me he'd give you a place at the betting shop, so you have to go through the other entrance, down Montague Street."

"I didn't know that. Thomas gave me this address." You take the paper from the pocket of your worn woollen coat and hold it out to her, she takes it and reads it, then shakes her head, throws the cigarette on the floor and takes a key from her small purse to open the door. She gives you permission to enter and you both walk down a hallway to a living room decorated with brass and elegant floral china. The Shelby house is compact and has a typical terrace style. There is an excessive amount of floral and brass decorations throughout. The Shelby family are rich in money but lacking in what is considered conventional good taste, it was evident that their gypsy roots were intact in their home, as you come to a small kitchen with a coal fireplace there is a pantry that has been opened up to form a small back room. But instead of a wall, black curtains cover what is on the other side.

Polly Gray walks up to them and opens them, then opens two doors in a row, finally arriving at the famous betting shop, which is bustling with activity. The large room is dominated by a huge blackboard where two bookmakers keep the bets and odds. You approach it and look at it carefully, each holding a ladder to reach the top of the board. Your eyes move to scan the room which is filled with cigarette smoke. In the middle of the large room is a large desk where men queue up to place bets and at the back of the room is a small office, divided by glass and curtains. Polly Gray walks up to stand in front of you.

"With all due respect, but isn't having a betting shop in your own house illegal?" You ask.

"It is. But this house belongs to the Peaky Blinders and nobody messes with us, dear. Now, this will be your workstation, you will count all the money we collect during these hours and write it down in this book. At the end of the day you will calculate the total and write it down too" She hands you a huge dark brown one, full of dust and yellowed pages. "It was Arthur's work, but he is very bad at adding numbers, so this afternoon you will catch up with all the miscalculated numbers in this book." She turns around walking back towards the kitchen, "Good luck with that!". She shouts at you and disappears from your sight, leaving you alone in the middle of all those men looking at you as if you were an intruder.

You press the book tightly to your chest and take a seat at the large desk, you had to concentrate. One wrong step and they'd know you didn't belong in this era, and your attempt to help this family would be futile. You carefully check the numbers and definitely the older brother from Peaky Blinders doesn't know anything about sums, they were all wrong, you ask the man sitting next to you for a pen and start correcting all the wrong sums, at the end of the day you finish your work successfully and leave the book on the kitchen table and go back to what you call home. The same routine is repeated for two weeks, the Shelby brothers would come to the betting shop from time to time, do their typical revisions and leave for hours. Thomas Shelby was not a frequent visitor, the only time he came by he watched you work in detail and left without a word. You had to hurry, his future wife had already arrived in town, which meant he would soon be betrayed by her, which would cause him to become more involved in the mafia, you had to prevent it, you would save several lives, even hers in a few years.

You walk into the kitchen ready to put the book down when suddenly Thomas Shelby, soaked to the skin, enters, as usual, with a cigarette in his mouth. "Good evening, Mr Shelby," you say and turn around, but before you walk away you stop and look at him, perhaps it's the right moment to tell him what you've been rehearsing for days. "I'd like to give you an honest opinion about your business, Mr. Shelby," you start to speak and move closer to him, standing a few inches away. He nods slowly, giving you permission to continue. "Every day I write a large amount of money, the two weeks I've been working here the figures haven't stopped going up..." You look into his pale blue eyes. "Why don't you invest all that money in a new place to do your bets? A legal place, where the police can see it and can't do anything against you."

He takes a puff on his cigarette and approaches you, his breath mingling with yours in the air. "Come with me, let's talk business somewhere else."

Thomas Shelby starts to walk away from you, you soon follow him. As you walk you say nothing, your nostrils fill with the smell of wet earth, it has been raining at night for days and you couldn't be happier, you loved the rain. When you finally reach your destination he opens the door and you walk in without complaint, inside the pub it was warm, in the distance you see Gracie Burgess, she was even more beautiful than in the old photographs, blonde, blue eyed and delicate as a feather.

"Leave us alone, Grace," Thomas says dryly.

"Yes, Mr Shelby." She sets the whisky aside and walks out of the pub past you.

You walk over to where Thomas is sitting, lighting another cigarette. "I hear she sings beautifully," you say and sit down next to him, he frowns at you, "Besides, she's pretty, isn't she?"

"How do you know she sings?" he asks.

You get nervous and look for an excuse to remedy your mistake, "There are many people who say that...that sometimes she sings here."

He shakes his head, "I forbade her to sing weeks ago". Thomas looks down at the cigarette between his fingers, wondering why it mattered so much to you to talk about Grace.

You think deeply, according to her biography her singing made Thomas Shelby's cold and broken heart fall in love, if that's not exactly happening there are only two theories: whoever wrote the biography got it wrong or something is going on because of a mistake of yours. "Why did you forbid her to sing?" You ask him and he raises his eyes to stare at you.

"Because I am Thomas Shelby, and no one should disobey my orders" He says ironically and fills his lungs with smoke.

You chuckle "So this isn't a real pub. In pubs people sing and have fun maybe... you should let her sing".

"Maybe... Now tell me why are you so interested in the business? Would you like to be part of it?"

"No. Not really" You answer honestly, "I just feel that you and your family can have a lot more money without the need to be illegal"

"You don't like that we're criminals, eh?"

You shake your head, "No. I don't judge you for the life you have and chose, I just think you're a good family who deserve something good, something less...dangerous."

Thomas Shelby looks at you looking for a reason for your kindness to him and his family, ever since he met you, you have not stopped telling him that he deserves a better life than the one he has. Your simplicity appeals to him constantly and he hasn't stopped thinking about you since that day in this pub, he stubs out his cigarette and takes some coins out of his pocket, leaving them on the table. "I'll take you to the races, with this money buy yourself a nice dress. A beautiful woman deserves one, don't you think"

You stare at the money blushing, other men have called you beautiful but Thomas Shelby saying it had a different effect on you, something you thought was long lost, you blink a couple of times before picking it up. "When are the races?"

Your reddened cheeks look like a gesture of tenderness to Tommy, who smiles a faint smile on his lips.

Tommy takes you by the waist with one arm and guides you to the side to get a better view of the horses, everyone around you is excited about the race ahead. You and he, on the other hand, are quiet, enjoying the moment.

"They are the best this season" He starts to explain to you once you find a comfortable place, "That one there is the fastest in this race, he will probably win it" He says pointing to a black horse, you look carefully at the other horses, you didn't understand much about how to identify a good horse but a white one with black spots catches your attention, you look again at the gangster next to you who already had his eyes fixed on you.

"For me the white with black spots will win." You tell him and this time you point your finger at a horse. His eyes move in that direction and he automatically shakes his head.

"That one lacks training, it won't win."

"Wanna bet?" You challenge him and he raises an eyebrow with a coy smile on his lips.

"Alright, let's bet. If the one I say wins, you'll dance with me and tell me your name" He moves closer to you "If the one you say wins, you'll get a promotion at work, you'll be my secretary and the family business accountant"

You look at him in surprise, you were expecting a money bet, not that. You look at the horses preparing for the next race, a thousand thoughts come into your head, he can't know your name, that would only make his affection for you grow stronger, just like it is happening with you. You swallow hard and your eyes travel to his, they were like the ocean, so beautiful but at the same time they generated fear in your whole body. Unable to control your words you end up accepting his bet and he smiles blushing like a teenager, unable to control his emotions.

The sound of the gunshot brings you out of your trance and you look at the horses, which are running at full speed together with their rider leaving a dust in the air, you approach the bar and look carefully at the white horse, Tommy was right, it was slow compared to the others but you don't lose hope, your hands clutch the iron bar, squeezing it tightly. And a scream comes out of your lungs when the white horse catches up with the black horse but seconds later it runs slower, coming last among all the horses. The race is over, the black horse is the winner, your eyes turn to Thomas Shelby who offers you his hand with a mischievous smile, you take it and together you walk towards the dance floor, where jazz music reigns in every corner of the room.

Tom puts one hand on your waist and the other on your right hand, you try to follow his steps but it's impossible, you laugh as you make another mistake, inadvertently stepping on the left foot of the man in front of you. "Sorry, I've never danced jazz"

Thomas looks at you, unable to believe your words: "Why is that?"

"Well...in my town we don't dance to this kind of music" You try to explain, but you can't tell him that women in 2023 dance sensually in short dresses, "The music I usually dance to is more free, without the need to dance with a partner"

He pulls you close to his body and your faces are inches apart. "You are different from other women. I've never met a woman so interested in business and yet so spontaneous."

"All women are spontaneous and also like business," you say offended.

He caresses your back with his hand and shakes his head "I don't mean to offend you, I agree, but it's very difficult to find a woman like you here. Normally women were brought up to marry and raise a family. You show no interest in such things."

Your faces are almost glued together, and that's when you realize the reason he invited you to a race, the reason he's so insistent on knowing your name. Thomas Shelby showed no interest in Grace Burgess because you had captured his attention in every way. Despair invades your whole soul and you try to patch up another mistake of yours. "Grace is also a very intelligent woman, even more so than I am" He frowns as he listens to you "Besides beautiful and she—"

Tommy's lips are glued to yours, your first instinct is to pull away from him but you can't, instead you close your eyes and let yourself go. You just couldn't deny the fact that he is a very attractive man and you had been dying to taste his lips for a long time, you just didn't know that the feeling was reciprocated. Thomas grabs your waist tightly, pressing his body completely against yours and deepens the kiss, his lips were soft but they were full of desperation, he wanted more, he wanted every part of your body but you couldn't let him. So you pull away from him with a push from you. He opens his eyes not understanding what is happening while you shake your head.

"This is wrong, Tom. You shouldn't be with me" You say, unable to control your words, totally disturbed by what had just happened.

"What are you talking about, ey?" He asks and approaches you, taking your hands.

You break free of his grip and pull away from him. "I can't be with you, Thomas."

He pushes his hair back and purses his lips before speaking: "Are you...do you love another man?"

Your gaze goes down to the ground, you think of the consequences if there is something between you. It would change everything and you could never go back to your time, you would never see your family again and you could never travel back in time, and the destiny of him and his family would change completely, you would no longer know what would happen to his life if he is with you and not Grace. Your eyes fill with tears and you look him straight in the eye. "Yes. I am in love with another man" You lie to him.

He takes a deep breath and nods, "Good. I think it's time for you to go home."

click here

Everything I touch (Thomas Shelby x reader)

Request: Basically, enemies of Peaky Blinders attack me, then Tommy arrives at that moment to save me, he fights and wins but he is hurt. So I look after him and he makes a declaration of love to me, he has been very scared for me, and realizes that he loves me more than a friend....

Warnings: sad, angst

Disclaimer: I'm french and even if I'm learning English for eight fucking years, it's not perfect and I'm sorry if there are spelling or grammar mistakes. If English is your native language (or if you’re bilingual), I would really appreciate it if you could help me by correcting my errors. Just don't be too harsh, please. :)

+ it’s a request from my book “Imagines for dreamers” on Wattpad

***

Small Heath wasn't the best district of Birmingham but you lived there since you were a kid and you knew half of its population. For many years, it was ruled by The Peaky Blinders, a fearsome gang. However, their members aren't what people imagined. To be honest, the first time you met their leader, Thomas, he seemed really cold, but with time you were surprised that he was kind. Kind and protective towards his family and his very closest friends. Lucky, you were one of them. The Shelby family was one of the best you knew, you couldn't lie about that, it's was very different from your family who always had been torn, burst like a nebula.

Every friday night, you had this habit to go to the Garrison and drink with your friends. At the same time, you saw Tommy with his brothers and used to skylark with John or Arthur. But that night, you didn't see Tommy, his brothers told you he was occupied.

"Probably occupied to fuck Lizzie or another whore, huh?" you whispered, shaking your head, which made John smirk and play with the toothpick between his lips.

"Jealous?" Arthur asked, putting an arm around your shoulder.

"No, if he catches the clap and his cock finish by unhooking itself from his crotch, it's his problem!" you replied coldly with a shrug.

John burst into laughter before he held you in his arms and ruffled your hair, making you groan ungracefully at the same time. Even if they were annoying the shit out of you, you couldn't help but laugh with them.

Even if Tommy was your best friend, you never understood his need to fuck every woman! It always had been the case before and after Grace. Why couldn't he stay with someone? The bastard was aware of his charm's powers and never failed to use them. Jealous, were you? It was stronger than you. With time, the leader of the Peaky Blinders became more than a friend, you started to really like him, then to develop feelings for him and those feelings grown and in the end, you fell in love.

A few hours later, you decided to come home, letting the brothers and your friends smiling, laughing and singing happily, all of them drunk. When you were younger, your parents always told you to be careful and never walk alone in the empty and dark streets of Small Heath, but  tonight you ignored that rule.

You heard a "flirting" and disgusting whistle towards you before hearing a man's voice, probably very drunk. "Hey beauty'! What ya doin' here by yourself at this hour?"

You decided to ignore him and continue on your way.

"Bitch! I'm talking to ya!"

Suddenly, your back hit the wall and the man pushed his hand around your throat, trying to choke you. You struggled against him, fearing for your life because you thought he wanted to kill you for some reasons, but when he slided his big and calloused hand under your skirt, you shuddered of disgust. You gave him a kick in the groin which had the effect to release you.

"HELP!" you screamed in the hope to draw the attention of a gentleman passing in the area.

"Shut up, Peaky's slut!" he grunted.

He punched you right in the jaw, making you whimper. You thought for an instant that nobody will come to your rescue, until the man fled against garbages. It was so dark, seeing the faces of the two men was difficult. You savior was extremely violent with the rapist, but you were glad he was there. You heard bones breaking, groans of pain and finally a gunshot. Then, the silence hovered. Afraid and curled up against the wall, you hardly dared to look at the man.

"Y/N... It's alright, he won't try to hurt you anymore." you recognized that voice, she belonged to Tommy.

Immediately, you stood up and took refuge in his arms, head resting against his torso. You weren't stupid, but close enough to the Shelby's to guess your attacker was clearly dead, shot in the head. When you drew back, still in shock, you kept your hands on him as a support. Some of your phalanges were humid and when you take a close look, you saw this warm red liquid you hated. Blood.

"Oh god, Thomas, you're hurt..." you murmured, wide eyes.

"That's nothing, I just need stitches. I'm not bleeding to death, love."

My heart missed a beat and I just nodded.

*

"If Tommy was hurt because of me, my role was to stitch him, right?" you thought. When you made sure your best friend was okay and didn't need anymore sutures points on his left flank and his arms because of that crazy man and his knife, you tried to not stare at his body. To be honest, you find it pretty hard. So you couldn't help and glance quickly.

"I'm so grateful you came, Tommy. I can't imagine what would have happened if you didn't..."

"Well... I probably would hate myself for a long time, but you'll never relive it. I'll make sure no fuckers touch you that way anymore, alright?" he replied, softly stroking my cheek.

When you looked into his icy blue eyes, contrasting with his dark lashes, you saw a glimmer that you were unable to name.

"Let me take care you."

"How..?" you whispered as he ran his digits in your hair and played with the strands.

"When Grace passed away, I never thought I could love someone else so deeply. You made me change my mind and I realised I was blind, you were under my eyes all this time and I pushed my feelings away. Everything I touch ends up breaking, maybe they're right when they call me the Devil, that's the reason. Loving you was condemning you. Ignoring those fucking feelings after Grace was to protect you. Yet, I failed and I'm sorry. And I'm lost because I don't want to break your heart or someone to hurt you because of me." he confessed, locking his gaze into yours.

Your heart felt like he was going to explode. Sadness, excitation, happiness and love took you by storm and there was nothing you could do. You loved him so much. You dared to kiss him and you were proud. He replied to the kiss, letting your lips discover each other before your tongue met his with passion and intensity. With ease, he placed his hands on your hips and made you sit on his lap. Breathless, you broke the kiss as slowly as you initiated it. Forehead against forehead, staring into his blue eyes and your nose coaxing his.

"Having my heart broken by you would be an honor, Thomas Shelby."

It was a dangerous game you were playing at, but you were willing to.

The wrong path (Cillian Murphy x reader)

Request: Could I request a cillian x female reader one shot where the reader is a lot younger than him, like twenty years or something, so cillian is hesitant to make a move and he thinks the reader isn't into him but really they're hesitant because they have BPD

Warnings: Age gap/age difference, Borderline Personality Disorder (I’m not sure if it’s real respected or not, but I assume that no one will be able to explain the disease as well as a professional or a person who has the illness/deasease/trouble)

Disclaimer: I’m french and even if I’m learning English for eight fucking years, it’s not perfect and I’m sorry if there are spelling or grammar mistakes. If English is your native language (or if you’re bilingual), I would really appreciate it if you could help me by correcting my errors. Just don’t be too harsh, please. :)

***

Before him, you had never admired anyone. You admired him for his personality, his talent, his breathtaking beauty, you were able to admire him as a sculpture of Rodin. Perfection emanated from his body. You could only be receptive.

When his baby blue eyes were on you, your heart was melting. His freckles contrasted with the hardness of his high and sharp cheekbones. And those lips... Those lips that you wanted to kiss. You were infatuated with this man without him having to make the slightest effort. It wasn’t mere feelings. Yours were much stronger than the norm, those who almost took your heart off your chest and literally triggered butterflies in your stomach. His presence was amazing, he made you feel better and you had never felt so good in the presence of a man. Your emotions increased tenfold affecting your feelings for the man. This older man, this man who could be your father, this man just divorced and who has children just a few years younger than you. As his body began to age, yours had finished blooming.

That man who loved you too, but had no idea you had feelings for him. This man to whom you hid your passion for him. Each of your discussions were short, short and intense. It’s through these discussions that you have fallen in love with each other, through these discussions that you have hidden from him your darkest secret. A secret that you hated, that gnawed you, that leads your life and affects each of your relationships.

A whole weekend with him? Who could have thought? The idea didn’t make you nervous, it frightened you to the point of panicking. An anxiety attack before joining him at the rendezvous point and you put your mask on, you refused that people know this part of you. The disturbed mental part, would tell people who don’t understand the disease. Could he understand it? He was always mature and smart, but you didn’t want to lose him forever.

He came to pick you up by car, the trip went perfectly, your fear had immediately dissipated at the sight of the man, a real feeling of release. During the whole trip, you felt normal. Normal? What does this word mean? With or without Borderline Personality Disorder? Often you dodge this question.

His house and the garden were wide and it was a good thing, it would allow you to not always be with him in his house. Why did you accept? Your feelings had pushed you there and a part of you hoped something would happen between you two. After all, you would be home alone with him for two and a half days. Only, would you accept such a rapprochement without hesitation?

"Do you really want to impose your trouble to him? Cillian doesn’t deserve that..." you remembered thinking that.

Later, he invited you to the restaurant and you couldn’t say no. You were delighted as if he had just bought you a house in front the sea, you restrained yourself from exploding with joy, you just smiled and thanked him with a little hug. You wanted to kiss him, but it didn’t seem like a good idea. Gently, you realized that you were slipping on the wrong path, the one that separates friendship and love.

The meal went very well, now you waited for dessert and in the meantime, you left to go to the bathroom. It was during that time that Cillian took the opportunity to think about the situation. Try something or not? Your beauty hypnotized him, your kindness too, you were so adorable with everyone. Looking in your eyes, there was something he couldn’t decipher: a triumphant form of innocence over cracked foundations. You've never shown him a particular interest, you never have especially flirted with him and yet, you always agreed to see him and this weekend, you were there, with him, you would sleep in his house. Could you really agree to go out with a man 20 years older than you? Someone who was 42, who already has two sons aged 13 and 11? How could he, possibly, make you meet them? Actually, he didn’t care of the people’s staring, but he didn’t know if daring to make a move toward you was morally right. Perhaps you only saw him as a father? The idea made him shiver with disgust. He also knew very well that a girl your age wouldn’t have the same expectations as him.

When you came back to him, that beautiful smile stretching your lips, sparkling joy in your eyes, he knew he had to do something or give up. Although cliché, he saw an opportunity to offered to him when you finished your chocolate fondant, there was this light piece of cake at the corner of your lips. He leaned toward you as you watched him, intrigued and excited from the inside as he brought his face closer to yours, running his thumb to the corners of your mouth to remove the crumb. Finally, he gently put his lips on yours for a brief kiss, but it was enough to have the answer to his questions.

You blushed when he stepped back, but you wanted him to start again, you already miss the sensation of his hot lips against yours. You wanted to see again his beautiful and light freckles and his captivating iris. Yet, you didn’t know what to say, you wait for the man to speak. You were close to the point of no return. You were terribly afraid of losing him because he would regret his action or he was playing with you, that he made you wish a serious relationship like some men his age do with women much younger...

"I like you a lot, Y/N.” He confessed with a small smile, himself nervous. For how many years did he not seduce a woman? It was almost 22 years ago, he felt like a teenager again. And even if he played Thomas Shelby, a womanizer, it did not help much. After all, he was the kind to be shy.

"I can’t be with you, Cillian."

Cold, hard, you didn’t want to say it that way. Fear was already in your eyes. The state of nervousness didn’t exist for you. You also didn’t think this simple sentence could hurt him; this is one of the symptoms of your illness, you have trouble predicting the consequences of your actions. A symptom among many others who concerned you; the disruption of identity, in other words, often questioning yourself, not being able to analyze your own emotions clearly, to idealise (or devalue) the other, the constant fear that one plays with your feelings. At that moment, you were trying to protect yourself against the one you were idealizing.

"You don’t want or you can’t?"

The question was simple. You only had to repeat a part of the sentence. You closed your eyes a few moments and bit your bottom lip until you felt the taste of blood spread in your mouth.

"I can’t.” You ended up answering while your vision was blurred, you had tears in your eyes.

"Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.” You told yourself mentally.

"Y/N? What's the matter…?” He asked in a soft voice, anxious as he saw your eyes wet. "I don’t blame you, I just want to understand what's going on and why you can’t.” He added, placing his hand on yours before caressing her tenderly to reassure you.

"I can’t be with you because I'm not normal..." you answered with a trembling voice, looking down at your plate.

"Hey, don’t say that-"

"I assure you it's true, I'm not the kind of girl to be perfectly normal. You can’t be when you have borderline personality disorder..."

You put your hands on your face, it was a bit childish, but you didn’t want him to see you crying. Despite your illness, you were sufficiently aware of your symptoms, except that you couldn’t completely control them.

Cillian got up from his chair and went to kneel beside you, putting one hand on your knee and another on your shoulder that he was stroking. He knew this trouble a little, but he had never realized that you were touched by it. He knew what it represented, build a relationship with you would be delicate, but he wanted to try the adventure.

"It's not because you're borderline that you're not normal. It won’t my feelings for you."

You raised your head before giving him a slight smile and taking refuge in his arms, no matter how many eyes were on you at that time.

He knew perfectly well that the critics would be numerous: a great actor in a relationship with a 22 year young woman, borderline and not a celebrity. He already saw the titles and the insults that will come, always discreet about his private life.

But he wanted only one thing: your happiness together.

Periods part 2

Request: I received a few requests to write a second part about Michael Gray, Finn and Thomas Shelby.

Warnings: none

Disclaimer: I’m french and even if I’m learning English for eight fucking years, it’s not perfect and I’m sorry if there are spelling or grammar mistakes. If English is your native language (or if you’re bilingual), I would really appreciate it if you could help me by correcting my errors. Just don’t be too harsh, please. :)

***

Michael Gray:

➳ Michael was intelligent and received a good education, so he knew a few things about periods, but he asked Polly some advices.

➳ He wasn’t disgusted by the blood, so if you needed to change the bed sheets or something, he never said anything.

➳ Running warm baths for you, to help you to relax all your tensed muscles and to relieve your cramps.

➳ Sometimes he cooked for the two of you, especially if you were in a bad shape:

“What are you doing, babe?”

“The Sunday roast your mom used to cook. With some hope, it will be edible!”

“Please don’t kill us...” you whispered, a little smile stretching your lips. 

“Eh! I’m not suicidal, alright? We’re not going to die of food poisoning; I’m not Finn or Isaiah.”

You couldn't help but laugh, cuddling him from behind to thank him. Luckily, his dish wasn't bad, even if it will never be as good as your mother’s.

➳ Making some yoga postures because once, an Indian man told him that it was what his wife was doing to relieve her pain.

➳ He used to massage your entire body, insisting on your lower abdomen and back, where your ovaries were killing you.

➳ Preparing an herbal tea every night before he read to you your favorite book because it made you feel so much better.

 Finn Shelby:

➳ Poor Finn never had a good education. Actually, he didn’t know how to read and write until he met you and it was the 1920s, so he had a lack of knowledge about periods and in general about how female body work.

➳ The first time you were in pain while he was present, he didn’t understand until you explained him what was happening. But he was still confused, even if he didn’t show it.

➳ Being the cutie he is, he asked Ada for some help and she told him how he could help you to cope with the pain, if he wanted to serve to something and avoid being a useless boyfriend.

➳ The second time you had your period and that he was aware, he ran to a grocery shop and bought chocolate even if it was expensive at that time. Then, he went to the florist to surprise you with your favorite flowers!

➳ He still wasn’t quite comfortable to ask you to massage your lower abdomen because he was very respectful and shy, so he just cuddled you as much as you wanted.

(A/n: I know the Finn version is super short, but seriously I didn’t know what to write... So, if you have more ideas than me, tell me in comments and I will add them (and credit you)

 Thomas Shelby:

➳ The man had so many women in his bed in the past and had truly loved two of them before you, which made him an EXPERT. He gathered the expertise of all his brothers and his cousin.

➳ He knew what kind of tea you should drink, especially chamomile tea, and what food you could eat to prevent cramps. He even made sure you were hydrated.

➳ He made you bath in warm water every morning and night to be at peace.

➳ He massaged all the right spots like a pro, you didn’t need to tell him where it hurt the most AND he kissed you at the same time. This man had a gift to understand the woman anatomy and he could charm your ovaries.

➳Tommy bought you clothes, perfume and makeup from Paris, very expensive stuff at this time, and also pastries with flowers because it was good for your morale.

➳ Spending more time with you and Charlie on the first day of your period because it drained you from your energy and it was a good excuse to be more present for you two.

➳ Joking about getting you pregnant with his third child so you won’t be on your periods for a long time, this led to a more serious discussion, the baby subject, because both of you wanted a child in common. Especially since you didn’t have your own baby by blood, even if you loved Charlie and Ruby (even if she had a mother that was still in love with Thomas) as your own children.

“Would you prefer a boy or a girl?” he asked since he already had the two.

“It doesn’t matter as long as the baby will be healthy.”

Then, trying to choose names with important meanings for both of you.

➳ Cuddling all the night, his hot hand on your lower stomach since you were the little spoon.

Love war (Cillian Murphy x reader)

Request: Could I request a cillian x female reader where the reader meets his children for the first time and they get along really well (the reader is younger than him - 20 years like your other imagine) xx

Warnings: none

Disclaimer: I’m french and even if I’m learning English for eight fucking years, it’s not perfect and I’m sorry if there are spelling or grammar mistakes. If English is your native language (or if you’re bilingual), I would really appreciate it if you could help me by correcting my errors. Just don’t be too harsh, please. :)

I know, it took me six weeks to write just an imagine and I’m so sorry I made the anon wait this long... I’m sorry. Really.

***

You were nervous. It was an understatement. Being in a relationship with Cillian was already a lot, he was 20 years older than you, but it never had been a problem. It's just that people always judged you for the age gap even if you've learned to ignore them. A serious relationship was: getting involved, which meant, among other things, meeting his family. You already met his parents and his siblings, you pretty get along with them, they were really nice, but his two sons? Never. Why? Because your boyfriend wanted to be sure it worked between the two of you.

Even if you were stressed, a part of you was excited to meet Malachy, 12 and Aran, 11. You had seen them in photos and they were the spitting image of Cillian, especially Malachy. You were in your new apartment, the one in which you now lived with Mr. Murphy. You waited impatiently, sitting on the sofa in the living room, for the arrival of Cillian and his sons. Your leg was moving nervously, you knew they were going to show up from one minute to the next. When you heard the front door open and their little voices, you smile without realizing it.

You got up and went to join them before gazing at them. The first to see you was the youngest of the two who greeted you shyly. A small laugh escaped your lips and you hugged him. It was something you hadn’t controlled. You wanted to see their adorable faces for ages! You did the same thing with Malachy before presenting yourself and showing them the apartment, especially their bedrooms.

Even if you were happy, you were still awkward because you didn’t know if they already liked you or hated you and what you could do to get to know them! You really hoped they were as sweet as Cillian. So, when they dropped off their belongings in their respective rooms, you went to see them to ask if they wanted to do a particular activity. The two young boys had the same idea: go to the fair. You loved it too. Then, inevitably you promised them that you would go in the afternoon, after eating.

At lunch time, you had cooked lasagna and the two boys feasted, seeing this warmed your heart because you knew you were on the good way to make them like you as a stepmother. You almost choked with your food after Aran asked a question "important" for a couple:

“Are you going to make a baby? Are we going to be big brothers?”

You casted a glance at your boyfriend who was hiding his amused smile, letting you voluntarily answer the little boy. Of course, you had already talked about it, the idea was very tempting. You hadn’t had a child on your own yet, Cillian dreamed of having a daughter and since he was 42 years old, he wanted to avoid waiting too long for a third child. You two agreed to wait a little longer, which meant that you would try in the following months. You cleared your throat before answering:

“Well… Would you like to be big brothers?”

“You make dad happy and we always wanted a sister… So, it would be great!” responded Malachy with a smile.

You couldn’t help but smiled back.

“That’s something we were talking about. You’re alright with that?” intervened Cillian in the discussion. Aran nodded with a smile and Malachy thumbed up in approval. You were already very relieved.

While the boys were brushing their teeth, you took the opportunity to do the dishes with your man and stole him kisses from time to time. He laughed before he kissed you properly.

“They understood the reasons why their mother and I divorced and I’m sure they already like you.”

A big smiled stretched your lips.

*

The boys were so excited, they ran everywhere, desiring to try every merry-go-around even when Cillian kept telling them to stay calm and avoid drawing attention to you. You accompanied them in almost all attractions, except those that were a bit too thrilling to your taste. The fact that you only had nine and eleven years of differences with the two boys made you understand them and have fun with them. You spent your day laughing with them, teasing them and letting them do the same. You acted like you were their friends, even if your boyfriend intervened once or twice, judging they were going too far.

Malachy and Aran asked you to have candyfloss and an ice cream at 4 o’clock as a snack, you decided paid with a good heart, running with them to one of the food stands. You were already fond of the kids. When you gave them their delicacies, they thanked you, but before they had a chance to eat, you put ice cream on Aran’s nose before he wiped it with a little grunt. His little grimace made everyone laugh. He tore off a piece of his brothers' candyfloss before tucking it in your mouth.

“Thank you, little munchkin!” you said after you emptied your mouth, then you laughed.

You held the child in your arms and in exchange, he put a slobbering kiss on your cheek to bother you. With this, he ran away, knowing full well that this little war wasn’t over and that Malachy will ally to you. Cillian watched the scene, a big smile stretching his plump lips and his crystal blue eyes sparkling with joy. He was so much reassured and happy that his children got along well with you.

A love war just begun.

I'll Fold Like the Makahiya Leaves (Thomas Shelby x Reader)

This gif makes me go feral 👹👹👹

✨NSFW [Mention/Scene of cheating (Not Tommy), p n v, Unprotected (cover it before you tap it? is that the term?? XD), Oral (both), Language], Thomas "gentleman" Shelby, You one rich bish (Daughter of a duke), and mention of death✨

🐧Hello!!!~ I have exams so I tried finishing this before I can go study my ars off. Also got 8 vaccinations in one go :"D so if you don't hear from me after this month I'm dead XD HAHAAHA Kidding I wont die... becuase I have more than one personality in me >:D. Also this may be a BIT long :”D BUT its a lovely story I swear :”3 sorry heh… for those who don't know what Makahiya Leaf (Humble Plant) is... Its this🐧

Anyways :3 have fun reading ^^

-----(Before the War, City of Bermingham)

The streets of Birmingham always seemed to move a little slower when you passed through. You’d see the familiar faces, offering them polite smiles and small nods from your carriage window, though your mind was always somewhere else. Your father taught you well—manners, grace, independence—but you never felt quite like the lady everyone saw.

Your father, the Duke, made sure to hire the best-of-bests to teach you everything, Literature, Combat, and Cooking. You were the best at everything as well, although your preferred cooking to which your father gifted you a restaurant of your own on your eighteenth birthday (which you managed perfectly).

At times like this when you'd be looking out the window, you’d often catch sight of Thomas Shelby, the man you secretly adored from afar, standing near his betting shop. His eyes would meet yours for the briefest of moments before he nodded in acknowledgement. It was strange, the way your lives always seemed to brush against each other but never really connected. Your father knew the Shelbys, business of course, but his feelings toward them were mixed. He respected Thomas’s sharp mind, but he didn’t want you getting too close to a man from a family like that. Especially since you were the only thing his wife left him after passing away, he was not risking it.

Not that it mattered at the time. You were, after all, engaged to Billy Kimber, a man of status, a man your father approved of.

"You have arrived Miss" your driver shouted from the outside as your footman opened the door.

"Thank you, Mister" as you jumped out of the carriage to your fiance's house.

You planned to surprise him by visiting him. Bringing along with you the pasta you cooked especially for him. With a small smile, you went forward not knowing that this was where your life would fall apart. Going in you'd see a mess was made in the living room, the maids looked at you a worry as if they warned you not to go upstairs. You slowly go up to see clothes scattered around the staircase and panic ensues in your mind. Finding his room, you slowly open the door a little to only discover Billy entangled with a woman—with your closest friend, no less. The betrayal cut deep, and you didn’t know what to do with the pain. You slowly closed the door as you went downstairs. Billy's groans and your friend imprinted on your mind like torture, you gave one of the maids the pasta and left.

-----

Calling off the wedding, your father cut all connections with Billy. Highly disappointed with his actions as he comforted you. You cried all week, eyes swollen in tears as you curled up to your knees on your bed. You just loved him too much it hurt.

After weeks of torture and isolating yourself. You hear from the maids that a war was in the midst. A sudden idea comes to your mind, as you ran to your father's office. The pain and torture of the memory bruising your kind heart, bringing you to a decision that only made sense at the time—you volunteered for the war effort, not as a soldier, but in a position that still gave you purpose: a culinary officer overseeing the mess halls (an Admin is what your father pushes you to do, but he made his connections make sure you cook too becuase your were very adamant about it).

Your father had connections in the war. Giving you that choice to be in war but not on the field, but still do the thing you loved the most. You buried your heartbreak in the work, letting the chaos of war drown out the memories.

-----(During the War, Meeting Thomas Shelby)

The clang of pots, the smell of food cooking, and the steady rhythm of military life became your new normal. You found comfort in the kitchen, in the work. It was easier to focus on meal preparations, and managing the chefs and budgets than to think about everything else you’d lost. Over time, the carefree, kind girl you used to be slipped away. You became mature, more efficient, and more respected. But there was still a part of you that missed who you had been.

As the day passed by, normal as it may be, you supervised the mess hall as the staff served soldier after soldier. As you passed by the back to oversee the service, a loud bang shattered across the room.

"Danny! Calm down!" A man with blue eyes exclaimed as he tried to pin the bigger man down he flipped all the tables and screamed which echoed through the halls.

You ran out the back of the kitchen and helped the other man, successfully pinning him down to the floor.

"You're alright! Danny!," you spoke in a calm tone to Dannys' ears as he continued heaving. You patted his back and talked him out of his oblivion.

"Wars outside Danny, you're in the mess hall, you're safe here," you whispered as his breathing slowly normalized.

The man with blue eyes looked over you in suprise, as he lifted Danny off the floor who was now apologizing. You said it was alright as you commanded the staff to clean his mess. You knew what the war did to people and this was almost an everyday occurrence in the mess hall.

As nurses escorted Danny out of the mess hall, the man with blue eyes approached you and spoke, "Sorry bout that, Ms. Y/L."

You then turned around to look at him and were surprised to see Thomas Shelby, how could you have missed that? "Mr. Shelby? You serve in the war?" was the only thought in your mind as he stared at you with his icy blue eyes. He nodded, "and you... manage the mess hall," he said with a small smile, you nodded.

This was the only time you two conversed fully, You've always wondered how'd he sound like, your father never really wanted you to approach him so he usually just greets you by tapping his hat and that's that.

However, after this day, Thomas Shelby started appearing in the kitchen almost every day. At first, it was just a glance as he passed by, greeting you as he walked by with his brothers who were smiling at you. But soon, he was offering his help—carrying supplies and staying after meals to clean up. You didn’t question it at first (since every other soldier would do the same, even his brothers), his presence was different, warm to be exact despite this cold war going on. You’d exchange a few words, small talk about the war, but nothing too personal. Yet, there was a quiet understanding between you. You both knew what it was like to feel the weight of the world on your shoulders and soon conversations ran deeper. To you explaining about your mother's passing, to him exchanging the information on how his father left their mother. It felt really warm having him at this times.

------

One evening, as you finished overseeing the evening’s meal preparations, you felt him watching you again. You kept your eyes on the work, your hands steady as you diced vegetables. “You’ve got a habit of being in places you don’t belong,” you remarked, not looking up but knowing he was there.

“And you’ve got a habit of working to the bone,” he replied, his voice low but teasing.

You finally looked at him, meeting his eyes. “It’s better than thinking about what’s out there.” you placed the knife down and sat on the edge of the desk.

Thomas nodded, his gaze softening. “I could say the same.” approaching you as he took another pair of knives out, "Mind if I help?" he picked up a potato as he looked at you waiting for your permission.

You shook your head and smiled at him before taking the potato out of his hand, "It's alright, I don't want you hurting yourself like last time." Pointing at his injured fingers.

He chuckles as he places his hands deep in his pocket. "I'll just accompany you then," as he leaned on the desk watching you skillfully slice the vegetables, he was in awe at how your delicate hands seemed so soft even after so long.

He stood there in silence for a while, and then, Arthur and John stepped in, laughter spilling from their lips as they approached.

“Look who it is ey?! The lady chef! Our dear Ms. Y/L” John called out, a teasing lilt in his voice, as he held your hand and kissed it softly. “You’ll be cooking for our wedding feast soon!”

You rolled your eyes, trying to suppress a smile. “You’ll have to find someone to marry first, John.”

Arthur chimed in, grinning widely. “I’m sure if you keep cooking like this, you’ll have all the men lining up for you.” his strong accent apparent as he spoke.

“Better watch out, Tommy,” Arthur said, glancing back at Thomas with a smirk. “I think you might have competition.” pointing his chin out the window with other men peeping at her. They then quickly hid as Arthur pointed at them, like mice seeing a big scary cat.

You caught Thomas's eye for a moment, and he raised an eyebrow, seemingly amused (annoyed?). “I think you’re the one who should be worried,” he replied dryly, nodding in your direction. “With her cooking, she’ll have any man she wants.” as he looked down, definitely not liking the attention you're getting from other men.

John leaned in closer, a playful glint in his eye. “How about we place a little wager, then ey? I bet you’ll fall for her before the war’s over.”

“What? Me?” Thomas replied, his voice laced with sarcasm. “You’re out of your mind.” chuckling a bit nervously.

“Oh, come on!” John insisted, nudging Thomas playfully. “I’ll bet you a fiver you'll be chasing for her soon. She’s got that way about her, you know?” winking at you.

You couldn’t help but laugh, shaking your head. “I doubt Thomas would ever fold for someone like me," chuckling before contintuing, "but I'm in.” patting the bag of coins in your dress pocket.

Arthur smiled, leaning against the counter with an exaggerated sigh. “What do you say, Tommy?” John pressed, his excitement growing. “Ten Quids? Just for fun.”

Thomas rolled his eyes, but the corners of his mouth lifted slightly. “I’m n't part of this ridiculous bet. I have better things to do.”

“Yeah, like how to not smile at our lovely chef here,” John joked, causing you to blush slightly as you shook your head.

Thomas pushed his brother out, apologising to you, as the two brothers walked walked away, you felt a mix of embarrassment and amusement. The Shelby brothers were relentless, but there was something warm and comforting about their banter. It reminded you of the camaraderie you had lost.

You looked back at Thomas, who seemed to have softened a bit, as he walked towards you once again. “Don’t let them get to you,” you said, attempting to lighten the mood. “They tease because they care.”

He shrugged a flicker of appreciation in his gaze. “They’re n't wrong, though. You've got talent keeping us lot well-fed.” staring at the men outside the window as they ran away. You laughed at that.

“Only as long as you’re not causing too much trouble outside,” you replied, the smile breaking through his cold exterior.

His gaze lingered a moment longer, and you felt something shift in the air, but you were still worlds apart, separated by unspoken words and hidden emotions.

-----

As days passed, Thomas was asked to serve on the field again, but just before he left for the front lines, he did something you didn’t expect.

As he walked through the back kitchen with his hat in hand, he looked at you with concern, his eyes flickering with something you couldn’t quite place. “I don’t usually say things like this,” he began. “But I’ve had my eye on you long before this war.”

Your heart dropped. You didn't expect that Thomas Michael Shelby would have rendered feelings for you. However, you were not ready, not yet, not after the heartbreak you’d been through. “Tommy, I…” you stuttered, fidgeting your fingers behind as you looked him straight in the eye. Tears almost flow to your eyes.

“I know,” he interrupted gently. “I know about what happened with Billy.” As he walked towards you, closing the remaining distance, but making sure there was still space for comfort.

The mention of Billy made your chest tighten, and you looked away. “I'm sorry Tommy, I can’t, not yet. Not after everything…”

He nodded, walking forward a bit more as he kept his eyes on you. “I understand.” As he placed his warm lips on your forehead as you inhaled. You kept your eyes closed as you heard his footsteps go further, opening only when you heard it no more and with that, he was gone.

You sighed as you scolded your heart for not taking such a kind man in your life, but you were hurt, your heart still had that scar. Inhaling the crisp air of the kitchen, trying not to break down and cry, you turned and continued cooking. Thoughts spiralling through your mind.

-----

You exchanged letters after that, brief notes of friendship and support, what you both needed at the time. However, one day, you received a different letter. You opened it knowing it was from your father, Colored crimson red just like how your father loved, you opened it with delight.

Dear Ms. Y/N,

I hope this letter finds you in good health, despite the circumstances surrounding it. It is with profound sadness that I must inform you of your father’s passing. The Duke departed this life earlier this week, leaving behind a legacy that has touched many.

In light of these events, it is imperative that you return home immediately. There are important matters to discuss regarding the estate and your father’s wishes, and I believe it is crucial for you to be present for these conversations.

Please take the necessary steps to join us as soon as possible. Your presence is vital.

Yours sincerely,

Lord Benedict Hargrove

Solicitor to the Duke’s Estate

Tears balled down your cheeks.

You were alone now.

------

With this, you were excused from your duties to attend the succession meeting with your father's connecting family (people you've never met). Leaving the war to go home.

Your father left you a hefty sum of money (possibly all his wealth) and the business he gifted you on your eighteenth birthday. Your relatives scoffed at you for this as they only got material things he owned (which also caused so much). Greedy people, you thought, they never even visited your father before he died and now they're here taking his money. The title was not given to you though, it was given to your male cousin (who was only thirteen). That was fine, you didn't even need the money from him because you had your own, you needed him but that was impossible even with all the money in the world.

-----

As the dust of war settled and the world slowly began to stitch itself back together, you found yourself in a position you had never anticipated. With the title of Duke passing to your younger cousin, you embraced your independence, leaning into the fortune your father had left you. Your father’s birthday restaurant—your pride and joy—became a symbol of resilience, not only for you but for the entire community.

Determined to build a legacy that would make your father proud, you transformed the establishment into a hub for soldiers returning home, providing meals and solace after the chaos of war. Word spread quickly about the new culinary wonder in Birmingham, and soon your name became synonymous with quality and innovation in the restaurant business. You took risks, introducing bold flavours and dishes that spoke of both tradition and your flair, quickly gaining a loyal clientele that appreciated your artistry.

In a time when women were often relegated to the shadows of men, you stood firm, a woman at the helm of your empire. Your determination and skill earned you respect, not just among the patrons but also from your peers in the industry. You refused to be overshadowed by the legacy of your father or the titles of your male relatives. Instead, you carved your path, proving that you were more than capable of handling the business and the challenges it brought.

Despite the accolades and success, a part of you felt incomplete. You often found yourself gazing out the window of your restaurant, lost in thought, wondering where Tommy went, it has been a year since his last letter. His absence weighed heavily on you, each passing day filled with uncertainty. Did he think of you? Did he know about your father’s passing? Is he... alive? Questions lingered, unanswered, like shadows at the edges of your heart.

-----

The pub was quieter than usual that evening. You stood behind the bar, wiping down a glass as your mind drifted. Life after the war had changed you. You had returned to Birmingham, but you weren’t the same woman who had left. The kindness, the sweetness—you didn’t let it show anymore. People respected you, maybe even feared you, but they didn’t know you. Not anymore.

You bought a pub close to the Shelby business (Sold to you at a lower price due to your name being famous in Bermingham). You didn’t buy it for any sentimental reason. You didn’t expect to ever see Thomas again (although your heart strings it). You convinced yourself he was gone, just like so many others who never returned.

And then, the door creaked open.

At first, you didn’t look up. You were too busy with your thoughts, too used to the routine of tending the bar. But when the room fell silent and some men left, you felt it—a shift in the air. Slowly, you raised your head, and there he was. Thomas Shelby, alive and standing in the doorway, looking very much like a ghost from your past.

For a long moment, neither of you spoke. You just stared, your heart pounding in your chest.

“Tom-Tommy? Y-You’re alive,” you finally whispered, the words catching in your throat.

“I am,” Thomas replied, his voice calm but heavy with something you couldn’t quite name. Guilt, maybe. Regret. “I’m sorry for disappearing…” as he slowly approached you, hands squeezing his Garrison cap.

“Sorry?” You set the glass down with a thud, your hands trembling. “I thought you were dead, Thomas! For a whole year, I thought—” You stopped, choking on your own words. “Why didn’t you come back? Write a letter or something???”

Thomas stepped closer, his eyes never leaving yours. “I didn’t know how. After everything, I wasn’t sure…”

His words broke something inside you. All the emotions you’d been holding back came rushing to the surface, and before you knew it, you were crying—crying. “You left me!” you screamed, the words torn from deep within you. “You left me for months!” as you backed off the counter and flaunted to the cabinet wall.

Without a word, Thomas walks into the bar closing the distance between you, pulling you into his arms (Your customers leaving). You tried to push him away at first, beating your fists against his chest, but he held you tighter, his voice low and soothing. “I’m here now… I’m here.”

You collapsed into him, letting the tears come as he held you close. The world outside didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered was that he was here, and you weren’t alone anymore.

-----(Everyone left the pub, leaving you and Tommy)

Later that night, you sat at a small table in the corner of the pub, the firelight flickering around you. The warmth from the hearth contrasted sharply with the coldness you had felt all year. You and Thomas exchanged glances, words unspoken hanging heavy in the air between you.

He shifted in his seat, running a hand through his hair, the weight of unvoiced confessions lingering between you. “You’re different,” he said finally, his gaze intense. “Stronger. I admire that.”

You couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath, the compliment washing over you. “I had to be,” you replied softly. “After everything…”

The room fell silent again, and you felt the vulnerability creeping in. “I thought you’d forgotten about me,” you admitted, unable to meet his eyes. “After you disappeared, I thought—”

“I could never forget you,” he said, his tone firm. “Not a single day passed without you on my mind. I tried to shove it away, but the thought of you being hurt… it haunted me, it did.”

His confession hung between you like a delicate thread, fragile yet binding. Your heart raced as you met his gaze, the spark of something familiar igniting between you. “and yet you left, but I understand now,” you said, the emotion spilling over (he explained that he had to be admitted to the hospital after receiving a life-threatening wound, putting him in a coma for months and weak for the rest. A reasonable reason for you to forgive him like lightning). “Although, I thought I could never forgive you.” sighing in relief.

“And now?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper, a smile slowly tugging his lips.

You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of everything you’d been through. “I-I missed you. Admittedly.” before pausing to look at him. "I missed you, most ardently,"

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips. Then, out of nowhere, he said, “Then marry me.”

You blinked, sure you hadn’t heard him correctly. “What?”

“Marry me,” Thomas repeated, more sure this time. “I don’t want to waste any more time,” as he stands to walk closer to you.

You stared at him, your heart pounding. You had imagined this moment in so many ways, but not like this. You stood up with him as you looked into his eyes, and realized that you didn’t need time. You had known my answer all along.

“Yes,” You whispered, voice barely audible. “I’ll marry you, but you promise this time? No disappearing?”

He squeezed your hand gently, his eyes shining with sincerity. “I promise. No more running. I’ll fight for you.”

As he placed his hand on your waist with a knowing smile plastered on his face he grinned, pure happiness lighting up his face as he embraced you, lifting you off your feet in a whirlwind of joy. “I’ll make you the happiest woman in Birmingham,” he promised, his voice warm against your ear.

As he set you back down, breaths heaving from the joy you both shared, he placed his left hand on your cheek, gently caressing it. With his icy blue eyes locked onto your lips, he whispered, “May I?”

You nodded, but instead of waiting for him to make the first move, you pulled him closer by his collar, kissing him softly. The deep groan that escaped him sent a thrill through you as he tightened his grip around your waist with his right hand, while his left hand found its way to the back of your neck, deepening the connection.

The kiss was tender yet electric, answering the questions that had lingered in your mind for so long. He missed you, loved you, and that was all you needed. You pressed your forehead against his, feeling the warmth radiating between you.

With a surge of emotion, you kissed him again, this time more passionately, as if trying to pour all the lost time and unspoken words into that moment. The world outside faded away, leaving just the two of you, tangled in each other’s arms, lost in a whirlwind of feelings that had been building for far too long.

------

He groaned, and you held onto his shoulders, anchoring yourself to him as the kiss deepened, the world outside fading away. Good thing the pub was closed because, within moments, you found yourselves on the floor, completely lost in each other, breathless and exposed.

“Fuck, you feel so good, dear,” he moaned, his voice rough and filled with desire as he began to thrust in and out of you. His movements were slow yet deliberate, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body, each thrust eliciting heavy moans from your lips.

You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer, craving more of him. Every inch of your body pressed together ignited a fire within you, each thrust igniting a deeper longing. His hands explored your curves, fingers grazing your skin, sending shivers down your spine as you met each thrust with your own rhythm.

“Thomas,” you gasped, your head thrown back as the pleasure built, eyes meeting his fiery gaze. There was something primal in his expression, a raw need that matched your own.

He captured your lips again, the kiss becoming a desperate dance of tongues and breaths, a promise of everything you both wanted. With each thrust, he drove you closer to the edge, your body responding to his every move as if it were a well-rehearsed melody.

“I’ve missed… missed you, y/n,” he whispered against your lips, his breath hot and ragged. The weight of those words sank deep into your heart, and you pulled him closer as if the closeness could bridge the gap that time and circumstance had created.

With every thrust, the heat between you intensified, your bodies moving in perfect harmony. You could feel the pressure building deep within you, a coil wound tight, ready to snap.

“Thomas, I—” you gasped, unable to form complete thoughts as pleasure coursed through your veins. Your body responded instinctively, tightening around him, and with a final thrust, you were sent spiralling into bliss, your orgasm crashing over you like a wave.

“Y/N!” Thomas softly groaned, feeling the way your body clenched around him, drawing him deeper into your warmth. He didn’t stop; he kept thrusting, wanting to prolong the pleasure that enveloped you both. Each movement sent another pulse of ecstasy through you, pushing you to heights you didn’t know existed.

“Please,” you whimpered, overwhelmed by the sensations, your body teetering on the edge once more. The overstimulation was almost too much, but you craved it, craved him. “I can’t… too much…”

“Just a little more, love,” he murmured, his voice low and sultry, completely lost in the rhythm of your bodies. He thrust harder, deeper, chasing his release, wanting to see you unravel beneath him again.

With a series of slow, deliberate thrusts, you felt the familiar rush build once more. The world around you blurred as you scratched his back. “Thomas!” you cried out, arching your back as the second orgasm hit, sending stars dancing, moaning as you looked straight into his icy blue eyes.

“Y/N!” he gasped, feeling the way you tightened around him again, the sight of you unravelling beneath him igniting a fire within him. He couldn’t hold back any longer, thrusting into you a few more times before he finally reached his climax, spilling himself on your stomach with a low groan.

The room fell silent, save for your heavy breathing as you both heaved from the intensity of what just happened. Thomas slowly withdrew, catching his breath, and a satisfied smile crept onto his lips as he looked down at you, flushed and blissed out.

“I’ll be right back,” he murmured, leaning down to plant a soft kiss on your forehead before rising to clean himself up. You watched as he retrieved a cloth and gently wiped away the remnants of your passion from your skin, careful and tender.

“Thank you,” you whispered, a shy smile tugging at your lips.

He returned to you, covering you with his big coat, the fabric enveloping you in warmth. You nestled against him, both of you laughing softly, the moment feeling almost surreal. You just did it on the floor.

“Quite the way to celebrate our reunion, eh?” he teased, his voice light, yet there was an underlying tenderness in his gaze.

“Definitely not what I expected,” you replied, your laughter echoing in the empty pub.

As you both settled into a comfortable silence, the warmth of the coat and each other enveloping you, the world outside faded away.

-----(Watery Lane)

The next morning, Thomas took you to meet the family. Arthur and John were already waiting when you two arrived, grinning like they’d just won a bet.

“Told ya she’d come around,” John said, elbowing Arthur. “Just took Tommy long enough.”

You laughed, shaking your head as you reached into my pocket and pulled out a small pouch of coins. “Here,” you said with a smile. “Your winnings.”

John chuckled as he pocketed the money, while Arthur grinned at you like you were already part of the family.

Polly watched you from her seat by the fire, her sharp eyes taking in every detail. After a long pause, she spoke. “You’ve got the backbone for this family,” she said looking deep into your eyes as she sighed. “You’ll do just fine,” Polly said approvingly. “You’ve got the strength to keep up with this lot.” puffing another hit on her cigar.

You smiled, feeling, for the first time in a long while, like you were exactly where you were meant to be. Felt like home.

-----(Married to Tommy <3)

Being married to Thomas Shelby meant more than just sharing vows; it meant a newfound power in Birmingham. There was an unspoken fear that rippled through the streets whenever his name was mentioned, and you could feel it. People admired you, not just because of your accomplishments, but because they understood the weight that came with being Mrs. Shelby. Thomas intended to keep you safe, to wrap you in a cocoon of protection that no one dared to breach. The knowledge that no one would dare hurt you, not with him at your side, filled you with a sense of security you had never known before.

As the sun began to set, painting the sky in hues of orange and purple, you prepared for Thomas’s return home. You had spent the day tending to the pub, the laughter and chatter of patrons ringing in your ears, but nothing compared to the excitement of having him back in your arms. The warmth of his presence was something you longed for, something that made your heart race just thinking about it.

The door creaked open to your shared home, and there he was—Thomas Michael Shelby, rugged and handsome, the familiar twinkle in his eyes igniting a spark within you. You walked to him, unable to contain your smile as you flung your arms around his neck. “Welcome home, my husband” you whispered, your heart swelling at the sight of him.

He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close, and you felt the world outside fade away. “I missed you, my wife” he murmured against your hair, his breath warm and comforting. Without hesitation, you leaned in, capturing his lips with yours in a soft yet passionate kiss. The moment felt electric, igniting a warmth that spread through your entire being.

As the kiss deepened, you could feel the weight of the day slip away. Thomas’s hands moved to your waist, drawing you closer as if he wanted to meld your bodies into one. You lost yourself in him, the world around you disappearing until it was just the two of you—lost in your universe.

Your heart raced as you pulled back, searching his eyes. There was a hunger there, an undeniable connection that only deepened with each stolen moment you shared. In that instant, you knew that this was where you belonged, wrapped in his arms, feeling utterly cherished.

Thomas leaned in again, this time capturing your lips with more urgency. His kiss was fervent, igniting a fire within you that made your breath hitch. The taste of him lingered on your lips, sweet and intoxicating, and you could feel the pull between you, a magnetic force drawing you ever closer.

He broke the kiss, his forehead resting against yours, his breath heavy. “Let’s not waste any more time,” he said, his voice low and filled with desire as he swept you off your feet. You gasped, both of you laughing softly, placing soft kisses on his neck as he walked up the stairs.

"Oh dear Tommy, I'll always fold like a Makahiya Leaf for you no?" chuckling as you licked his ear eliciting a deep groan from him.

"No worries y/n, I'll wait till you open again like I always do" as he kicks the door close. As he laid you gently on the bed, the air between you crackled with anticipation. He kissed you as his hands pulled your nightgown up and your hands unbuttoned his vest and polo, leaving both of you naked in minutes (With Thomas in his trousers).

Thomas’s eyes darkened with desire as he took in the sight of you beneath him, the soft glow of the setting sun illuminating your features. You felt your pulse quicken as he leaned down, his breath warm against your skin.

“Just relax, love,” he murmured his voice a deep growl that sent shivers down your spine. He started trailing soft kisses along your collarbone, his lips warm and teasing, igniting every nerve in your body. Each kiss made you arch into him, craving more of his touch.

“Tommy,” you gasped, your fingers threading through his hair as you pulled him closer, urging him to continue. He chuckled softly, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you, and continued his descent, his mouth leaving a trail of heat along your skin.

His kisses travelled lower, savouring every inch of you. As he reached the hem of your dress, he hesitated for just a moment, locking eyes with you, seeking permission. You nodded, breathless with anticipation, and he wasted no time in lifting the fabric, exposing your bare skin to him.

“God, you’re beautiful,” he breathed, his eyes roaming over you as if you were a work of art. With a slow, deliberate motion, he kissed your thighs, igniting a fire within you. You squirmed beneath his touch, the sensation of his lips brushing against your skin almost too much to bear.

“Please, Tommy,” you pleaded, your voice thick with desire. He looked up at you, a wicked grin spreading across his face, before diving in, his mouth exploring you with a fervor that made your back arch off the bed.

His tongue worked magic, teasing and exploring, eliciting gasps and moans that filled the room. You held onto the sheets, desperately trying to ground yourself as waves of pleasure washed over you. The world around you faded away, leaving only the two of you in this intoxicating moment.

“Just like that, love,” he encouraged, his voice muffled against you, and you felt your body respond, tightening around the pleasure he was giving you. He continued to work his magic, his movements expertly bringing you closer to the edge, the tension building deep within you.

As your breath hitched, you could feel the pressure mounting, a delicious tension coiling tighter and tighter until you felt as if you might break. “I’m going to—” you gasped, unable to finish your thought before he intensified his efforts, bringing you over the edge into a blissful climax.

Your body trembled as you rode the waves of ecstasy, calling his name, your fingers digging into his hair as the world around you spun. He didn’t stop, though; he continued to savor you, prolonging your pleasure as the overstimulation sent you spiraling once more.

“Tommy, please,” you gasped, overwhelmed by the sensations, but he only increased the fervor, his mouth working tirelessly. Your body responded, the waves crashing over you again, igniting every nerve ending until you were a quivering mess beneath him.

With a final surge of pleasure, you let go, your second orgasm washing over you like a tidal wave. Both of you lay there, breathless and entangled in each other, the world outside forgotten. Thomas gently kissed your forehead, his clean fingers tracing soothing patterns on your skin as you came down from the high of your shared passion.

He finally pulled back, just enough to meet your gaze. “You alright, love?” he asked, concern lacing his voice, but the smirk on his lips hinted at his satisfaction.

“More than alright,” you replied, a grin breaking across your face as you snuggled into him.

After a moment, he got up to clean up, his movements effortless and casual. You watched him, feeling a warmth swell in your chest. When he returned, he draped a big coat over you, wrapping you in warmth and comfort.

“Ready for round two?” he teased, his eyes sparkling with mischief as you laughed, the sound echoing in the cozy room.

“This is going to be a long night,” you replied, a mischievous glint in your eye as you shifted beneath the warm coat. You could feel the remnants of passion coursing through you, and the sight of Thomas’s relaxed, satisfied posture ignited something within you.

With a playful grin, you pushed him back onto the bed, surprising him. His eyes widened, a mix of curiosity and amusement flashing across his face. “Oh? What’s this, then?” he asked, his voice low and teasing.

“Just returning the favor,” you said with a smirk, your confidence surging as you climbed over him, straddling his hips. His breath caught in his throat, and you could feel the heat radiating from him. You leaned down, capturing his lips in a heated kiss, savoring the taste of him on your tongue.

As you pulled back, you let your hands roam down his chest, feeling the muscles beneath his shirt. “I think it’s time I take care of you, Mr. Shelby,” you whispered, your voice sultry and inviting. You could see his surprise morph into a pleased grin, and he nodded, a hint of anticipation in his eyes.

You began trailing kisses down his neck, your lips brushing against his skin, eliciting soft gasps from him. The thrill of being in control sent a rush of adrenaline through you. With each kiss, you worked your way lower, taking your time to explore him, to tease and tantalize.

“Bloody hell,” he breathed, his hands instinctively gripping the sheets as you continued your journey. You could feel the tension building in him, and it fueled your desire to push him further. When you reached the waistband of his trousers, you paused, looking up at him with a playful smile.

“Do you trust me?” you asked, your voice a low murmur. He met your gaze, his icy blue eyes darkening with hunger as he nodded. “Always.”

You leaned down, slowly unbuttoning his trousers, your fingers brushing against his skin. The moment you freed him, you wrapped your hand around him, feeling him pulse in your grasp. You looked up at him, a wicked smile playing on your lips, before taking him into your mouth.

“Y/N,” he groaned, his voice thick with pleasure, and you felt a surge of satisfaction at the sound. You began to move your mouth in a slow, tantalizing rhythm, taking your time to savor him. Each flick of your tongue drew deep moans from him, and you reveled in the power you held.

“God, you feel so good,” he gasped, his hands tangling in your hair, guiding you gently. You picked up the pace, your mouth working him with a fervor that sent shivers through both of you. The sounds he made only spurred you on, pushing you to explore him further.

As you lost yourself in the pleasure of the moment, the world outside faded away, leaving only the two of you, intertwined in this blissful dance. You could feel the tension building within him, and it ignited a fire deep inside you.

“Don’t stop,” he urged, his voice strained, and you obliged, wanting to bring him to the brink. You intensified your movements, your mouth and hands working in perfect harmony as you brought him closer and closer.

With a few final strokes of your tongue, you could feel him tremble beneath you, his breath hitching as he neared his peak. “I’m close,” he warned, his voice thick with need, and you took that as your cue to give it your all.

With one final push, you enveloped him completely, taking him to the edge before he finally released, his moans filling the room as he spilled into your mouth. You swallowed every drop, feeling victorious as you pulled back to meet his gaze.

Thomas lay there, panting, his chest rising and falling as he looked at you with a mix of admiration and desire. “You’re unbelievable,” he breathed, a wide grin spreading across his face.

“Just doing my part,” you teased, wiping your mouth playfully before leaning in to kiss him again, feeling the warmth of his body against yours.

You settled beside him, feeling utterly satisfied and connected. “What do you say we continue this long night?” you suggested, a playful sparkle in your eye.

He chuckled, pulling you closer. “I think I could be convinced.”

With that, the night was filled with love and sense of comfort. Thomas Shelby was all you needed. A man who could wait for a Makahiya Leave open once more and shower her with all his love.

Indeed, he was all you needed.

-----

🐧Wrote this in my laptop... The spacings off... I got lazy removing the extra spaces sorry bout the long spaces in between hope it was still readable :"3🐧

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Little You-s and I-s

Thomas Shelby x Reader

Summary: You and Tommy deal with the changes that come with your pregnancy.

Your pregnancy changed you a lot.

You became more sensitive to smell for example.

One evening, Thomas arrived home from the bar, and as soon as you caught the smell of drinks and smoke on him, you rushed to the bathroom.

Then there was the incident when you craved fish but before you could cook it, the smell of it caught your nose and again, rushing for the toilet you went.

Keep reading

Bye!