Why Is My Salt Always 125786 Hours Too Late? - Tumblr Posts

Alternative Ending #1

To this encounter.

Man: Do you want me to cut it off?

Me:  *maintains intense eye contact while reaching in bag and pulling out a switchblade.**  Slides switchblade across the table, tilts head*   

Man:  ...

Me:  *raises eyebrow* Yes.  Do it.

** An AU where I am a bad ass bitch and carry a switchblade.

Should have said:

Listen pal, there's only enough room on this block for one Fuck Up (tm) and the position has been filled. GTFO!

That did not take long. He just stopped me in the street as I was walking to my car.

I ducked out by saying I didn’t have time to talk. I would have humoured him before. Maybe flirted. The thought makes me sick now.

Woo! Progress!