Worthlessness - Tumblr Posts
Commander Fox
He was overworked, exhausted and the most miserable person in the Galaxy. His name was Commander Fox and he was a replaceable clone.
Instead of fighting in the war, like he was made to do. He was in charge of the Coruscant guard. Don't get him wrong he loves his men, but he can't help the feeling of uselessness.
The other battalions look down on him and the Coruscant guard. They see him as a coward and a paper pusher.
He works hard because he wants to prove his worth. He's just a clone and he's easily replaceable. His entire life doesn't matter and if he dies someone will take his place.
The truth is he gets a lot of paperwork. That's obvious and he deals with a lot of stuff. Coruscant is a big planet and a lot of people live here. There is constantly something going on.
However even with all those different responsibilities weighing him down. The thing that takes up the most time might surprise people.
When he was first assigned to this job he realized something. His comm number was one digit away from the Coruscant suicide hotline.
After the first few calls he thought about changing his number. He was busy and he had his own problems.
However something inside of him couldn't change it. He tried multiple times, but in the end. He listened to peoples problems. He cried with them and he talked them down.
It wasn't easy and it was emotionally exhausting. However he didn't mind because for the first time in his life. He felt like he was doing something meaningful with his life. He didn't feel like a clone, when he talked to these people he felt like a person.
It was ironic that someone who thought his own life was worthless. Spent hours convincing others they were valuable and wanted.
However he couldn't stop himself. When he helped others he helped himself in a way. Maybe that's why he didn't change his number. He needed to learn how valuable he was through the eyes of people like him.
Me: I feel worthless
BFF: Then why do you seem so priceless to me?
Legit conversation I just had