Hello, My Name Is Kopper And Im Under 18.

Hello, my name is Kopper and I’m under 18. 

Smoker. Reader. Writer. Loves diet coke/pepsi. Adores black coffee(especially french pressed). Bucket of shit with manic depression(diagnosed). Anorexia/Bulimia for 2 1/2 years now. Fat piece of shit. Temper. Bad sketcher/painter/draw-er(?). 

Height: 5′1

Heaviest weight: 117 pounds/53 KG

Starting weight: 106 pounds/48 KG

Current weight: 98 pounds/44.5 KG

Goal weight: 88 pounds/40 KG (For now)

Joke’s on all of you, my whole life is that mood

I’m in a ‘let’s joke about my mental health so it doesn’t seem as bad as it really is’ mood tonight.

You want to binge again? Read this.

(Please note I wrote this to myself I’m not trying to make anyone deprive themselves from food and I’m not proana. Please remember to look after and love yourself. I’m just unhappy with my body and I use my blog as somewhere to vent.)

Think. Think about that food you want. Now answer this, how will it benefit you? Will you feel good after eating it? No. Will you lose weight and be happier with yourself if you eat it? No. You know what will happen if you eat that? You’re body will digest it and any left over calories will turn into fat.

How is making more fat going to bring you closer to your goal? Unless your goal is to make yourself obese then it can’t.

Yes it might taste “good” but that feeling is temporary, did you understand that? TEMPORARY! You’ll still be that fat overweight miserable person that you was before, if not worse. Eating that food won’t magically make all your problems disappear, they’ll still be there if not worse.

And presides, an hour after eating you won’t even remember how it tasted, you won’t remember why you wanted to binge on it so badly. All you’ll remember is that now you’ve eaten that junk it will take you even longer to reach your goal. It will take you longer to have the body you deserve. It will take you longer to ever be happy with yourself and your body.

You deserve to be happy. You deserve to love yourself. Fatty foods like that are only designed to make you fatter, to make you miserable and to make you come back for more. Don’t give in to toxic company’s whose only concern is they make money off you getting fat from their food.

That food will not make you happy.

Even if eating it does make you forget your weight and even if it does make you feel better in yourself, the second you’re done with it that feeling will be gone. And you’re back to hating yourself and looking at thinspo wishing you could be like them.

Work hard now so you can be happy later.

You. Are. In. Control.

You know, I remember where all this started. It begun when I was building muscle and wanted to eat healthier. Then it turned into counting calories because I wasn’t losing fat and gaining muscle as fast as I would’ve liked. Then it was calorie counting that slowly morphed into an eating schedule. After that, feeling extremely fatigued and hungry because I worked out too much and needed to eat. A lot. Then it was the self-disgust. Then the first day when i fasted. 24 hours. I remember the happiness I felt. And the hunger that came that morning. I binged, and then I purged because hey, it could work right? And now I’m this. I hate this. But I’m so addicted to it.

Tumblr Code.

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces”

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.

ChaysLove.tumbr.com

Extras from the Hamilton episode of Drunk History featuring Lin-Manuel Miranda

Burr earning Washington’s scorn

Hamilton’s falling out with Washington

Lin saying motherfucker many many times (uncensored, thank you @god)

Lin’s drunk voicemail freestyle for Alex Lacamoire