Cave Johnson Here. Do You Ever Get Sick Of Hiccups That Wont Go Away? Do None Of The Old Tricks In The

Cave Johnson here. Do you ever get sick of hiccups that won’t go away? Do none of the old tricks in the book work to get rid of ‘em? Well, I am pleased to announce that Aperture Science has created a long-awaited true cure for hiccups, via the complete removal of the human diaphragm and/or esophagus.

Gordon has a thousand yard stare.

He sure does

It’s such a silly issue to have but I want to write a stand-alone fic in which Caroline has to deal with Cave Johnson’s wife and young children after his death, with the implication that Cave was a serially remarried playboy (which might align with some people’s headcanons). But it’s been a struggle to write because in my favorite headcanons Cave is 100% asexual/aromatic with no interest in any sort of relationship and is just living life for the science and the hijinks.

I don’t know what else to do with my need to write “Caroline as tired and aging woman visiting her boss/best friend’s widow who had confusing feelings (mostly anger) for now-dead Cave” vibes. But they are there.

good evening everyone on tumblr

teehee

Instead of a Portal 3 or another puzzle-based Portal game, I want a Portal walking simulator. I want to play as Chell (or some other test subject) exploring all the levels of the facility and unearthing clues as to who the scientists who ran the place were, before it all went wrong. No tests, no danger, just ambiance and intricate details behind each door. Crawling through the vast entirety of Aperture, a decaying mausoleum to science and the ego of Cave Johnson. Basically the beginning of “Portal Stories: Mel” except longer.