OMG SO SPEAKING OF Im Imagining One Of Three Things

OMG SO SPEAKING OF i’m imagining one of three things

1. bilbo’s reaction to this violence on their quest when they spend time with the elves (confusion, alarm, angrily turned on)

2. for the bilbo/thorin shippers: hobbits subscribe to the more traditional mistletoe tradition of kissing (obviously). bilbo brings some into their home. thorin enters, see’s bilbo standing under it, and swipes his feet out from under him before bilbo can ask how his day was

3. for the legolas/gimli shippers: same schtick. legolas hangs some up with pure intentions only to be IMMEDIATELY AND AGGRESSIVELY ATTACKED. the big difference here is that legolas gives as good as he gets. furniture needs to be replaced. the bruises last for weeks. blood is drawn.

now i'm just thinking about that one tumblr post that said "mistletoe but u have to FIGHT anybody standing under it: MISTLEFOE" and now i'm absolutely losing my SHIT thinking about the dwarves fighting random ass people in Erebor's hallways cuz they saw one (1) fucking plant hanging from the ceiling decorations—

so fox news is horrible, old news, and my papi (grandpa) watches it all the time, also old news, BUT. today I learned something that legitimately gives me a little bit of hope. Apparently 20 years ago a kid called in and asked if their weather trackers if they could track where santa claus was, so now they have a santa tracker!!! who gives updates on where santa is!!! apparently he has just finished up in russia. 

MAJOR SPIDERMAN SPOILERS

As a spideypool enthusiast... they kind of handed us everything we wanted in this latest movie, guys. Andrew Garfield was literally talking about how he “stopped pulling his punches,” and “got bitter,” after Gwen died. He also talked a bunch about how he doesn’t have a relationship because he’s a workaholic. 

This is a PERFECT setup

james bond fic recs: 00Q

new james bond film came out so here we are

1. Denominations by WriteThroughTheNight

"Q confirms that he's an Empath three months before his first day of primary school, and the deciding of Denominations that comes with it."

OR

Q is smarter than anyone gives him credit for, and an Empath to boot.

~~~

This one was really fun. 00Q's kinda an old ship but it gives me ✨serotonin✨. James and Q don't interact and/or banter as much as I'd like but the character building was really detailed and I really enjoyed it.

2. Espionage is a Family Affair by nagapdragon

It's common knowledge that angels make good weapons and terrible soldiers. They're hard to kill, hard to catch, and leave a swathe of destruction wherever they go. That's why MI6 likes them.

James Bond, Agent 007, is one of the most devastating weapons MI6 will admit to having. Explosions follow his every whim and he's nearly impossible to kill, despite the best efforts of terrorists worldwide. He's second only to the weapons MI6 pretends don't exist- archangels are only a theory, after all.

~~~

This one is relatively long and is also an AU. Love the backstory this provides for both Q, Moneypenny and M. Really good relationship building between Bond and Q as well. There's an original character as well that fills in the role of R and she adds a whole load more to Q's character and history. Also really enjoyed the excerpts at the start of each chapter.

3. The Mating Dance of Wold and Fox by epithalamium, TheCatOnTheMoon

In which Moneypenny despairs of her boys, no one in MI6 is the least bit sane, Bond complains to HR about MI6's workplace policies, Q insists that he is not a fainting maiden, and he might have to sleep with 007.

Strictly for professional purposes, of course.

~~~

My absolute favourite 00Q fic. The bantering, the humour, the relationships. It's all brilliant. Props to the authors. This fic is hilarious and I totally recommend.

4. Ordinary Numbers by BootsnBlossoms, Kryptaria

More than anything, Mike Taylor wanted to be ordinary. Being a genius, he learned early in life, meant people expected too much. A career at the MI6 Help Desk seemed the perfect way to guarantee a lifetime of obscurity, until he got a very unusual tech support call.

~~~

Once again, Q's backstory strikes again. I adore backstory for Q as it just gives his character a whole lot more depth (also Ben Whishaw my beloved). Banter like never before and also kinda hidden identity. Q starting out at the bottom is also really great, really gives us a view of what is life is like outside of James Bond's circle.

5. the sheer lack of professionalism by scioscribe

Q rolled his eyes. “Oh, there are just bloody wheels within wheels to it, aren’t there, this kidnapping business? Really, you should give it up. You’re not cut out for it. Think about it, your first time out, and you pinch a national intelligence treasure and ask his MI6 boyfriend for ransom. It isn’t very promising, is it?”

~~~

Yes, I have indeed fallen into the Q getting recused by James but he's a BAMF in here (like he should be) and some really interesting kidnappers lmao. There's not much violence in here besides a kidnapper dying (but that's kinda a given). Witty Q as always which never fails to brighten my day.

6. Love and Other Hazardous Materials by luchia

"This is just getting ridiculous," M says when he finds Q trying to put motorized circular saw blades into a briefcase.

(Or, Q and James Bond love their jobs so very, very much.)

~~~

Short but sweet, this is truly great and they're both very deep in denial and very stupid. Highly recommend if you're just starting out on this ship.

here is my tale of woe

not all of it is bad i think….…. we are going to be okay i think.