So, When I Talk To Most People About Bleach, They Say The Most Surprising Thing Was That Aizen Was Evil.

So, when I talk to most people about Bleach, they say the most surprising thing was that Aizen was evil. Me? I knew he was EVIL from the beginning. How you ask? I am attracted to bad guys (hence why I'm such Grimmjow trash. Ugh that man 💙). Ahem..anyway!

I felt nothing for Aizen. Like, absolutely nothing. Is he conventionally attractive? Yeah. But if he doesn't stoke Kitty's fire, he's too evil.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk

I’m not even a fan of the bacherlorette and I LOOOOVED this!! I honestly cackled at Kenpachi 😹

Heyheyhey! Can you write headcanons for Bachelorette: Seireitei Edition with fem!Reader as bachelorette? With boys of your choice, just please add Renji, Byakuya and Grimmjow :) like, who’s gonna be gone first, who’s gonna win, who creates all the drama, who is the dark horse? Pleeeeease))

This ask came in to my email while I was waiting at the doctor’s office. (Just a routine check up, no big deal) So, I kicked these out while waiting on the doc! Lol! Keep in mind, I haven’t seen the Bachelor or the Bachelorette in a very long time, but I do remember the concept of the show. I hope you enjoy these!

Welcome to the popular show: The Bachelorette: Seireitei Edition

The last three contestants have been chosen, however, here are a few of the ones that were eliminated:

Kenpachi - Eliminated himself before the show got underway or he ever met you. He thought he would get to fight all the other contestants. When he found out there was a “no fighting” rule, he dropped out.

Yumichika - Was the first one to sign up for the show. Any reason to show himself off and be a peacock, he’s there. Was very pleasantly surprised that you were so beautiful. Eliminated early on because he came across as way more interested in you fawning all over him than trying to get to know you. Vanity, thy name is Eliminated.

Shinji - His sense of humor and charm made him a great contestant. His cutting sarcasm made him a viewer favorite. Unfortunately, he just didn’t seem to mesh with you. Both of you knew right away when he kissed you that it was that awkward feeling of kissing your brother/sister. He wasn’t surprised to be eliminated.

Shunsui - Made it to the top 4. Got eliminated after he drank too much sake and spent over an hour composing a horrible ode to you – every rhyme had to rhyme with “petal”. He just kept going. Would snort very loudly at his cleverness for finding homophones to use like “metal” and “mettle”.

The three finalists:

Byakuya - He figured there were worse ways to meet a woman. Knows he’s being completely rebellious. He likes that the elders will have an epic meltdown if he’s chosen and decides to marry another commoner. Gives you the arrogant noble act to see how you handle it. He knows you’re going to have to deal with his family and other nobles too. Is surprised not only by your etiquette but also your elegant way of making it clear that you won’t put up with any shit from anyone, including him. After that, when he has some private time with you, he lets down some of his walls – only off camera though. And, he will only speak romantically or kiss you if there are no cameras around. One kiss was caught – it made your toes curl and your knees buckle.

He’s rather confident that he’s going to win. One - he’s supremely confident in himself. He’s gorgeous, capable of deep passion, and a great catch. Two - knows that Renji and Grimmjow are going to cancel each other out with their rivalry. Is rather amused by that and has been caught more than once wearing a grin after one of their snarling and head butting sessions.

Renji - Still can’t best Byakuya in combat so signed up for the show because this was one thing he knew he could best his captain at. He’s his usual self: fun, sweet, down-to-earth, a bit of a goof, and very open. So open in fact, that the night he snuggled with you on the couch, he told you about his rough childhood and his rise to a lieutenant. That not only melted your heart, it melted the hearts of all the viewers – it was voted as viewer’s choice for favorite episode. That night was your first hot kiss too. It left you aching for so much more. Afterwards, you laid in his arms and traced the tattoos on his chest. Renji showed monumental restraint, he really wanted to strip you down and take you right there, cameras be damned.

He is completely confused by Grimmjow’s focused hostility on him. Not one to back down from anything, Renji snarls right back at Grimmjow. They butt heads a lot since fighting isn’t allowed. A prank war has erupted between them, each thinking the other started it – yeah, it was Byakuya that did that. (He’s not just a pretty face, he’s one damn smart tactician.) The latest prank was Renji replacing Grimmjow’s mouthwash with skunky cologne. 

Grimmjow - Signs up for fun. Since there was nothing in the rules that said only Court Guard members could be on the show, he was allowed. He is the dark horse. While completely adversarial with all the other contestants, he’s very different with you. He’s charming and a lot of fun. He holds nothing back – he finds you beautiful, he tells you; you look sexy, he tells you; he really wants you, he tells you. He’s another one that will avoid cameras when getting private time with you. Grimm has a badass image to uphold, having his softer side with you for public consumption is not something he will tolerate. The cameraman that tried to sneak filming your first kiss got lifted by the throat and threatened with evisceration. The only thing that saved him was your gentle hand on Grimmjow’s arm. The kiss that followed set you on fire, made you want him to carry you straight to bed so you could find out just how deep his passion runs.

Since there is no Ichigo to focus on as a rival, he’s zeroed in on Renji. The phrase “I’m gonna kick your ass!” flies around so much from either of them, many viewers have made a drinking game out of it. Surprisingly, Grimmjow leaves Byakuya alone, there is something infinitely scary about the nobleman and he’s not stupid enough to find out what it is. Retaliated to Renji’s mouthwash prank by adding maple syrup to Renji’s shampoo. The howl could be heard all over the house. Yet, another promise of an ass-kicking was snarled – take a drink, folks!

(I’m not picking a winner, because I just can’t. (And I’m very biased toward Byakuya as you all know) You’ll have to decide for yourself!)

Shh, shh...Hear that?

It's the sound of a lonely ask box. I would have loved to have already had OODLES of content for you guys, but alas...my inspiration seems to have taken a vacation and not invited me 😭

Musings, headcanons, gifsets, send them all! *laughs a la Don Kenonji*

~Kitty🖤

Reblogging for “dramatic bastard” XD

take a wild fuckin guess

Starrk, Ichigo, and Grimmjow going grocery shopping?

Ahhhhh! First ask, and it’s with

three of my favorite guys! ♥♥

Starrk:

·       First of all, please share your secret to how you got him out of bed.

·       He is definitely going to grab a

cart, even if the trip is just for a few items. Why? So he has something to lean on while he’s walking around.

·       He definitely likes to have a list, so he can be in and out to return to lounging as soon as possible.

·       He can definitely be trusted to shop alone.

·       If he’s shopping with you, he’s not really helpful for making on-the-fly decisions.

o  “What do you think? Should we get a rotisserie chicken?”

“…Why?”

“’Cuz they’re tasty!”

“It’s not on the list…”

·       If it’s not on the list, it doesn’t exist.

·       Super essentials-driven. Milk? Bread? He’s all over that.

·       Buuuuut, if there is one thing he will splurge on, it’s minimal effort/microwave meals that he can have when you’re not there to cook

o  The freezer is full of microwavable taquitos. FULL.

·       He about died when he discovered Costco.

·       He prefers buying in bulk simply because it limits the number of times he’d have to leave home, which often leads to some confusion on your part.

o  “Coyote…darling…is there a reason we needed 144 packs of instant ramen?”

o  “Why is there so much peanut butter?!

·       Fair warning: do not get sidetracked and start talking to someone. He will likely go from slouching on the cart, to leaning heavily, to falling asleep standing up and subsequently falling to the

floor.

Grimmjow:

·       You brave, brave individual.

·       This is the one you have to keep close by at all times. Why? Because he will put anything and everything that tickles his fancy into the shopping cart if you aren’t looking.

o  5 pounds of steak

o  Random sodas

o  3 different types of Trojan lubricant (“I mean, why the fuck not?”)

·       If, by chance, you end up losing him, the best thing you can do is to look for the free sample lady

o  Chances are he’s gonna be arguing with her because…

o  “Hey, give that back, young man!”

“You said they’re free!”

*frustratedly pointing at the tasting cups* “The little cup’s worth, not the whole box!”

“Fuck that!”

·       Due to the above interaction, chances are you will have to leave the store in a hurry because he will have grabbed all of the product out of spite and run

out of the store.

o  He will absolutely be laughing maniacally.

o  You will absolutely be writing an apology letter for him.

·       Do not—absolutely do not—release him unsupervised into the

supermarket. You are better off calling someone else if you can’t leave the

house.

o  He will not bring you what you asked for.

o  Worse yet, he will have probably forgotten that you had even asked him to get you something in the first place.

o  Just bags and bags of literally nothing you asked for bought with your credit card.

·       I don’t know you would think Grimmjow + grocery store would equal anything good. You have no one to blame but yourself for whatever shenanigans ensue

Ichigo:

·       Ah, the perfect specimen of human man

in a store.

·       Since he has two sisters and—let’s be honest—he’s the responsible male of the house, he’s pretty used to grocery shopping.

·       He is very used to making the grocery run and can do it in record time.

o  Shopping with him is fun because you can probably convince him to make it into a fun

game

·       Like Stark, he doesn't like to go without a list, but you could probably convince him to go off-list with just the right amount of puppy-dog pouting.

o  

“S-stop making that face! No means no!”

*pouting intensifies*

“…Okay, one ice cream. But this is the last time!”

·       He tackles the store methodically, trying to avoid any double-backing or turnarounds.

·       And, good grief, is the man the

master of the powerwalk

o  “Ichigo, slow down!”

“Nope! Remember, in and out. That was the plan.”

·       This is, of course, him shopping as a brother/significant other.

·       If it’s for his kid, I feel like he would go nuts with all the health food and baby needs.

o  Like,

all the baby food and formula

o  And healthy stuff for you so that, if you’re breastfeeding, the baby gets only the good stuff

·       He’s not one to indulge often, but when he does, it’s usually something ordinary like chocolate milk or juice boxes or maybe two eight-packs of

Gatorade.

·       What a man

Smokin’ Hot Headcanons

As quoted from the Smoking Is Cool page on TV Tropes, “If you’re badass, you smoke.” Smoking can either make someone look bad to the bone or someone is actually is bad to the bone look even more so. I think the Espadas are all pretty badass, soooooo here’s some headcanons spawned from a convo with my bro!

“Which Espadas do you think would take up smoking as a habit?”

Starrk: When we talk about “habits” with this man, you know it has to be something that requires minimal effort. For crying out loud, his favorite hobby is being asleep! Smoking would be a yes because it would not really require him to move from his favorite position (laying down/half-laying down) that much. At most, he’d have to move his arm towards the ash try to tap the stray ashes off or put the cigarette out, but then it’d be right to his lips again, dangling idly from his lips as he blows lazy whiffs out from his nose. He probably wouldn’t do it much around Lilynette, though, just because he wouldn’t want her pestering him for one (which he would never agree to. She doesn’t need to pick up any bad habits).

Barragan: This one is an immediate “yes” in my mind. He’d look like a cool mafioso type, just sitting on his throne surrounded by smoke. I see him with a cigar or a pipe. Y’know, something associated with old well experienced people. As a man who plays chess, a game that requires patience and time, he would appreciate a good cigar. It’s something to enjoy over time, something to be savored. In fact, I can see him with one clenched between two fingers while he plays a game with Tousen.

Harribel: I honestly can’t see her smoking. For one, the logistics of it. I can’t see her wanting to go into her resurrección form every time she wanted to light up. For another, I think she would think it was kind of pointless. I can’t see her ever letting something stress her out enough to do it, nor can I see her doing it just because. She’s not the type to do something without purpose, so she will decline.

Ulquiorra: If anyone ever offered this one a cigarette, I can practically feel that empty stare as he asks, “Why?” Like Harribel, he doesn’t do things without purpose. Most likely, after you explain that it’s something humans do to unwind, conveniently leaving out the fact that it can develop an addiction and be slow torture for the lungs, he maybe might try one. Just one. And somehow, he would manage to finish it all in a single drag. He would look unbothered and uncaring like always, but it will be pretty cool to watch the smoke spew from his mouth as he reiterates the fact that he doesn’t understand the activity while he walks away.

Nnoitra: Um. Yes. Definitely yes. He’s more likely to do it if he sees someone else doing it, and he’ll probably do it “better.” You know how obsessed this guy is with being the strongest. If he sees someone smoking one cigarette, he will have two lit up and smoke them at the same time. He also wouldn’t take filtered cigarettes. Not a chance. And no menthols. Only the smoggiest of cigs will do it for this guy and he will actively laugh out anyone who provided those as an option when he’s bumming a cigarette off somebody. He’d rather go smokeless! (He’d probably still take it, but complain the whole time)

Grimmjow: Catnip bud. Ahem. So, this is a bit tricky and could go one of two ways. 1) The idea can be off-putting to him because of that keen feline sense of smell. Smoke smell clings to clothes and hair for a long time after the cigarette is gone, so I can see that being overwhelming. 2) It would be something he takes up because anything that makes him look like even more of a badass, he’ll jump on it like a ball of yarn. It’s one of those things I can see so easily in a human!AU, the cool guy with the awesome outfit (I LOVE that post-time skip outfit) leaning against the wall and silently watching/judging passersby.

Zommari: Eh…nah. His favorite way to pass the time is doing his meditation thing. He seems like the type of guy who would always want to be super in control of himself. He will most definitely judge you if you are smoking around him and will prove himself superior by not engaging in such activities.

Szayelapporo: Thiiiiis dodgy summamabish. You see, this one would be more of a social smoker. And not just any social smoker, the type of social smoker that will do it ten times more flamboyantly than you. He will be there in the midst of it all, obnoxiously long cigarette holder in hand, twirling it around it a la Cruella DeVil while he prattles on about some lofty subject or other, while they pretend to listen. He certainly loves to strut.

Aaraoniero: Again, logistics don’t seem to allow much for this. Granted, he could put on one of the many faces he has taken over the years to get the job done, but that wouldn’t change the fact that he’s two weird floating heads in a jar, sitting on top of a borrowed meatsuit. So that’s a no.

Yammy: I...honestly don’t know. I feel like, despite calling it stupid/weak, he would at least try it. There’s honestly no telling what that guy will do next. If he does continue with the habit, I feel like it would be something done to pad gaps of boredom. He’d complain about being bored the whole time he was doing it.

~thoughts by Kitty ♥