Ok So In Response To This Poll That I Made Last Night, Why Is The Entire System At Fault For What One

Ok so… in response to this poll that I made last night, why is the entire system at fault for what one alter did?

Because if everyone was their own separate person outside of the system, then the blame would be placed on that one person who fucked up.

You wouldn’t go around blaming their friends, family, and entire social group for what they did, right? Or would you?

Because last I checked, the only person responsible for someone’s actions is themself in the end. You can try to sway them, you can manipulate them, you can convince them, but ultimately they have a final say in their actions.

At least that’s what I’ve been taught.

So please enlighten me on why the entire system is at fault for the actions of one alter? I am just trying to learn why so I can try and better myself and keep all of my headmates from being at fault for my own stupid actions. /gen

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Yeah. That helps a lot actually! Thank you so much! :)

-⛈️

Ok so… in response to this poll that I made last night, why is the entire system at fault for what one alter did?

Because if everyone was their own separate person outside of the system, then the blame would be placed on that one person who fucked up.

You wouldn’t go around blaming their friends, family, and entire social group for what they did, right? Or would you?

Because last I checked, the only person responsible for someone’s actions is themself in the end. You can try to sway them, you can manipulate them, you can convince them, but ultimately they have a final say in their actions.

At least that’s what I’ve been taught.

So please enlighten me on why the entire system is at fault for the actions of one alter? I am just trying to learn why so I can try and better myself and keep all of my headmates from being at fault for my own stupid actions. /gen

-⛈️

Ok… kinda tangent from this post I made a few minutes ago:

We got a tattoo recently. And… it’s helped me a lot all of a sudden. This tattoo. Right here.

A semicolon with a heart. Blue’s attempt to remind us all that we are loved, and that we should never give up. Gotten in an attempt to give our system inspiration to work through each day.

So… knowing that we’re all loved and can lean on each other in this system does help a bit…

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Another poll kinda related to the earlier one that is less specific.

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Important edit:

See fault as who should be held most accountable for the action.

Also, the responses that this has gotten so far have really helped because a lot of this was extremely related to our system’s past trauma from being emotionally abused (being given a bullshit definition of system responsibility, being “held accountable” wasn’t to make amends but to be held at fault and shamed/blamed no matter how much you tried to change and get better, and those internalized beliefs affecting my own view of myself through feeling as if I should feel guilty despite trying everything I could to make amends for what I did)

Thank you to everyone who responded to this already. Your responses have been truly helpful! :)

The way I see it (tho obviously this is just my opinion), only the alter is responsible for the actions, but the system needs to take accountability for it, at least when thinking about online spaces because you can’t really block just one alter

Yeah. I completely understand that. What’s really upsetting for me right now especially is that I had done the stupid thing privately, and had handled it privately, but then had it shared publicly when we decided to stop being friends with the person because they were acting like our ex-abuser had.

Then suddenly my own actions became everyone in the system’s fault. We were all marked as “problematic.” That’s what hurts me.

But I completely understand what you’re saying. The thing is, it seems that I’m using a different definition of accountability or something, because I always understood accountability as “it’s your fault, you now have to deal with it.” Might be past trauma talking, idk.

But yeah, I do understand what you’re saying. Thanks for answering! :)

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Source: This