This Boy Really Be Out Here Loving Everyone But Himself. Give This Man Therapy Please

this boy really be out here loving everyone but himself. give this man therapy please

Kai Version: Isn’t it so incredibly interesting how both smith siblings handled their trauma in drastically different ways?

Kai  has low self esteem/self worth (depends on people, powers, and statements to determine his value), constantly needs to prove himself, and is immensely dependent on external validation (his obsession social media is a prime example of this). He invalidates himself, dismissing his emotions/feelings, and needs regular reassurance (tendency to blame out-of-control situations on himself, likely derived from the mindset that his parents purposely left him because he wasn’t good enough, and i’ll bet my soul he stayed awake  nights wondering that if nya was firstborn, would his parents still leave?) .

His fear of being useless is also likely derived from that same mindset and as such he portrays himself through a cocky/prideful ‘persona’. This is false portrayal of himself, simply to appear stronger in the eyes of others, because if others think he’s of value they won’t leave him, because with or without this ‘mask’ not even he knows who is truly is.

He tends to dissociate during emotionally intense/overwhelming situations, or go into a state shock/confusion. He developed unhealthy coping mechanisms (violently self destructive) with situations regarding loss and grief. All of these things are results of and/or mechanisms he developed from his childhood trauma.

but. despite everything i’ve written above.  he loves nya. raised her. protects/supports her. took lloyd under his wing. he loves lloyd. throws heaps of physical affection towards cole. he loves cole. accepted jay as a brother in law, was so supportive of jaya and helped jay in proposing. he loves jay. makes things fun for zane, reassures him. he loves zane. showed master wu to believe in himself. he loves wu. he loves his entire team and expresses it in ways that value each of them individually. he makes friends with dragons. he loves dragons. he taught/worked with kids. he loves kids. despite what the disappearance of his parents did to him and nya, despite nya’s refusal to show her parents love (valid, btw) kai loved maya. he loved ray.  he loved his parents all over again, he loved his parents again so easily. he loved and loves and keeps loving.

trauma gave him self-destructive mechanisms. trauma instilled insecurity in him. trauma took away his sense of self worth. trauma emptied him of self-love. trauma stole his sense of identity. but kai held on to the ability to protect others, to care for others, to help others. he held them close to his chest. because like hell he’d let his trauma take that.

kai refused to let trauma strip his ability to love. his ability to love is unmatched.

Inspired by this post:

https://sugarglider-s.tumblr.com/post/692022087001473024/every-single-day-of-my-life-i-think-about-how-kai

My girlfriend and I found and bought the Stanley Parable Indiebox, and we read through the entire manual and this last page killed us

The Narrator hopes we set Stanley free....😭

TheFamousFilms sketches/doodles

EB/Vile

Evil Bryan >:DDDDD

Well, more like Evil Fnaf Bryan. A Fnaf universe Bryan that turned evil. Post End Game where no one survived. I’m sorry Lefty :,)

He decided to leave his universe and cause havoc in other universes :D

Basically a Mercenary. You pay him, he does what you ask. Get some info. Sabotage someone. Silence someone. The whole shebang. Pay him handsomely, he will make himself look like a fool and be the distraction you want him to be :)

Headcanon: He totally smokes. Definitely. He also uses kunai as his main weapon.

Dialogue:

EB: *reads the contract* Basically…you want a distraction.

Bryan: Yup!

EB: And you want me to make myself look like an idiot?

Bryan: Yup!

EB: …

EB: Pay me triple and I’ll do it.

Bryan: Deal!

“Being underestimated is one of the biggest competitive advantages you can have. Embrace it.” - from somewhere in the internet

I would like to see him go apeshit 💔

tfw you’re 16 and your friend dies and you go into a depressive episode but unfortunately you’re also a trained ninja and elemental master so you choose to take out your angst on unsuspecting idiots in an underground fighting ring

Ignition

Title: Ignition

Summary: 

Ig·ni·tion: “the action of setting something on fire or starting to burn.” //  Kai reflects on his element, wondering if the others feel the same fears he does about losing control.

Word-Count: 488

Warnings: Angst, Character Study

This was originally a part of a larger one-shot, but I can’t honestly remember the original intent of this fic. Thought I’d post it regardless!

-

If there’s one thing you need to know about fire is that it needs energy, it needs a source to feed from, to draw its flames from, because fires cannot stay alive without such things. Fires are not like water or earth, elements that lay dormant and passive a majority of the time. Elements that can be pulled from from the air and the ground beneath your feet. Fire has to be created. As feeble and finicky as creating a fire can be, once it’s created fire can seldom be controlled. 

It hungers to feed on the trees, the buildings, whatever source it can feast on to keep on living. It doesn’t like to die easily. You have to cut off its energy source or drown it in ice or water to keep it from persisting onwards.

Kai, of course, knows this better than anyone. As the Fire Elemental Master, he’s had his fair share playing with fire. It takes a lot of concentration, a lot of focus to pull fire from almost nowhere. It also takes passion and determination, an ambition and a drive. There’s always a constant, continual flame ignited in his soul, always seeking to get out, seeking to feast and destroy whatever enemies threatens Kai’s loved ones.

(Kai spends too many nights lying awake and thinking about how destructive his power is, how if he falters for a second he could hurt the very ones he yearns to protect. Worse, if an enemy somehow steals his power or brainwashes him, Kai’s fire could destroy entire civilizations)

He doesn’t know if the others struggle similarly with their elements. Wu knows, of course. That old man somehow always knows. Kai can tell when the fortune cookie wisecrack of “Focus is the key to harnessing your element without letting it consume you” is directed towards him.

Kai wonders if Wu has seen Elemental Masters of Fire go down a destructive route. He wants to ask if the burning flame in his soul is normal. Because the brief times he’s lost that flame, it’s like missing a limb. He knows it should exist, it should be running through his veins–burn burn burn–but it’s just gone completely.

The infuriating thing about it is how much he needs it to survive. He was an experienced swordfighter even before Wu took him in and since then, he’s had plenty of hand-to-hand combat training. Yet, his body moves sluggishly to danger, as if encased in a block of ice. He can’t force his body to move, without thinking how he’s going to fail all of them because of that lack of flame, that lack of desire to burn everything that stands in their way–

Later on, he’ll rant and rave about his frustrations, taking it out on poor Jay over it. He won’t let them know the anxiety gnaws at him as he wonders if next time will be costly for them.