Go Read A Book...

Go read a book...

Mum: you should spend less time in front of your laptop, why don't you go read a book?

Me: *looks at browser tabs* 'wattpad.com'/ 'fanfiction.net'/ 'bookrix.com'/ 'fanfiction.de'/ 'archiveofourown'/ ...

*looks at tablet apps*

'Fanfiction.net'/ 'wattpad'/ 'Google play books'/ 'skoobe'/ 'Fanfiction stories'/ 'fanfiction.de'/ 'ReadUp'/ ...

*sighs*

Well, have a seat. Let me tell you about fanfictions...

The unbearable joy of gardening, it could be worse...

So I was getting some serious gardening done today with my brother. I don’t think there are any people who have less knowledge of plants than we do (he once managed to mould cacti, I always withered them...). So we were clearing of weeds from the herb bed, each time we found something that was not obviously grass we asked: ‘What is this? Do you know this? Is it a flower? Is it some herbal-thingy? Can you eat it? Or can I just throw it away because it’s some weeds?’ Each time the answer was: ‘I have no idea. Probably weeds. It has no blossom so...just throw it away.’ (I have a feeling we threw away way more than what was neccessary)

Then the thing happened that was bound to happen: I had an unpleasant encounter. With an earthworm. (I honestly have no problem with bugs or spiders and everything else thats crawling around but these squidgy worms or slugs....uäääääh. Don’t need to have them anywhere near me tbh) And I was like: ‘Yikes. That’s disgusting!’ And my brother just relpied: ‘Could be worse, couldn’t it? Could be a slug’ Me: ‘Yeah... still nauseating, though...’ Brother: ‘That’s probably what the earthworm is thinking too.’ Me (used to such ‘compliments’ from his side): Well, thank you... Brother (totally ignoring me): ‘It’s probably thinking: ‘Ew, human! But it could be worse. That human could be a bird or something...’

Sirius: Remus is my best friend.

James: WOAH! If Remus is your best friend, then what am I?

Sirius: You're my brother of course!

Peter: And what am I?

Sirius:

Sirius: Well...uhm...you're...uhm...you're Peter, aren't you?

We all have, there is no sense in denying it

Have you ever tried to do a Harry Potter Spell?

dragon-heartstring-core:

So I was quite bored today (stuck in a hotelroom while it’s raining cats and dogs outside) and I ended up rewatching @asktheboywholived makeup tutorials. Minutes later I found myself in front of the bathroom mirror. Apparently it resulted in a remus cosplay (found that my hair matched his best and with not more than eyeliner, mascara and a lipstick available it was the easiest to recreate ;) ) Well, it was my first try and I actually quite like ‘bookish remus’ :D

I AM SO DONE WITH THIS WORLD!

For 5 nights in a row I keep having Harry Potter dreams (not that I am complaining about the Harry Potter part, after all I love Harry Potter) however these dreams keep getting weirder and weirder! After all my brain has to come up with new, fabulous Ideas to keep me entertained while I’m asleep! So in tonights dream world Voldemort owned a chamber of horrors in which he more or less locked us (Harry, Hemione an me; don’t know what happened to ron, i think later there was also tonks involved) in. So we got ourselves some tickets and passed the first door (I think from time to time this chamber of horrors had some similarities with an escape room). So the two of them just walked through that door and pushed me back (so I was still outside) the door shut close and the two of them continued alone. I’m still asking myself: WHY DID YOU DO THAT YOU LITTLE GITS! They fucking left me behind in Voldemorts maze-house-of-horrors-escaperoom thingy!

*Hum* On with the dream.

So I was trapped in the entrance hall (It was somewhere in the middle of nowhere, so I had to wait for them to return home with me...damn! My Dream-Self is way to dependent on other people!!!) I wandered around, looking for something entertaining (found some statue thingy of Salazar Slytherin; later on in turns out to be nothing but an entrance for employees; kept me entertained for half an hour though), when there were two middle aged moms discussing a boy who managed to get the group of children (probably a birthday party) inside by simply asking the door politely to open.

You can’t imagine how dumb I felt. Well, being nobody’s fool I decided to use the same method and tadaaaa it worked (turns out it was the method that worked my way throughout the whole maze-house-of-horrors-escaperoom thingy.) So I was finally inside...it was so fucking scary (there was nothing there yet but still, after all these little gits left me ALONE!) I made my way through the  maze-house-of-horrors-escaperoom thingy by simply asking the doors to open, sometimes i was in a house, then the track was outside (don’t forget it was a dream, everything is possible in dreams...and the wizarding world, so fuck it) whenever I entered a room I just went: ‘Hey, would you tell me your secret?’ And then another door opened (still you are scared, because there could literally be ANYTHING behind that door) or one of these as humans disguised robots appeared out of nowhere (You know, the kind that only moves it mouth, and like one arm in one and the same movement for the whole time, and a recorded voice telling you where you have to go next) met three of them The last one just freaked me out because IT COULD ACTUALLY MOVE PROPERLY and it did that BEHIND MY BACK, so whenever I turned around it was somewhere else, and I just couldn’t stand that And then suddenly it went dark (even darker than it already was) and I thought my glasses were the problem so I took them off and tried to clean them up (it didn’t work) but I just knew that there was something around me. And it was moving. I got so scared, that I simply started running in any direction. Didn’t know. Didn’t care. So I ran and suddenly there was Voldemort chasing me and I dind’t know what to do, so I sped up and kept running. The track led me into a cave (small path on the side it was fucking dark and couldn’t see the floor of this bottomless pit) then, out of nowhere Voldemort attacked me. Somehow I could fight him off, then he attacked me again and I fell (not on the floor but into this big black nothing tight beside me)

I thought my dream would finally come to an end. Turns out I had to start all over from this fucking entrance hall. That’s where I teamed up with Tonks (don’t know how she got there) we made a walkthrough (after all, I already knew the way) then we were chased by voldemort again. We had the splendid idea of just stunning anything following us or getting in our way (including other ...contestants? participants? don’t know) However we acted like completely egoistic bitches.  While running, we met Hermoine and (this time) Ron (don’t know how and when this happenend, but now Ron replaced Harry, and I somehow became Harry) So eventually the four of us reentered that damn cave, story repeates itself: voldemort (this time at least 4 of him) attacked us, we tried to fight him off, when it became clear thet we would loose, I had the genious idea to jump into the big, black nothing (after all that’s how I escaped the last time).

Turned out it was a trap to capture all of us. When we regained conciousness our feet were tied up and magnetically fixed to the ceiling of our cell. Hermoine found out that, if you struggled enough, you’d fall to the floor (but only to get pulled up again, after like 10 seconds) So we just hung there upside down. Again it went dark (so dark you couldn’t see anything) ...do you know that feeling in horror movies, when you know perfectly well, that there is someone right behind the main character but he/she turns around anyway? That is just how I felt. I knew there was someone. And I didn’t want to see him. Ron, however, completely ignored my hearts desire and casted Lumos (don’t know why he didn’t cut us loose, when he had his wand?! Little git!) So he slowly illuminated our cell. And of course the light hit the face that was like 2 inches from mine. Voldemorts face. (couldn’t have heard him breathing, after all he has no nose :D ) I got so terrified, that I started screaming. Loud. Really loud. Woke myself up that way. Me and everyone else in the neighbourhood.

Well, thank you for wasting so much time on my weird dreams. You will never get those precious minutes back, you know that, right? :P Hope you enyoyed, though. I didn’t. I am so done with this world and my damn overactive imagination