When I Got Home After The New Years Celebrations Last Night, I Took Off My Boots And Found This Pin Stuck

when i got home after the new years celebrations last night, i took off my boots and found this pin stuck in the bottom of one of them,, a good sign for the new year perhaps ? :-) 

When you make brownies, you make one big brownie and cut it into little brownies.

i love these

Darrel Rhea: "Flowers & Mermaids"

IM OK WITH BEING THE VILLAIN!!!

One of the things that life seems to keep me on my toes about is that not all people are going to like you. Thats kind of obvious at this point. But! What is not obvious is that people wont like you just for the sake of not liking you!

I have come to the understanding that, people have this notion, I have probably said it before in another post that. People really do think that the world is supposed to operate the way they perceive it to be. That the world is a one size fits all case. Which, we should know by now that it is not!

I bring all of this up because my sister recently had a conversation about me with some other family members. In a vague dismissive kind of way but in a way! I have a very short fuse when it comes to people I trust and I fuck with. These family members and I have burned bridges, each of us on our own side with one another. And well! It is what it is.

ON November 14th I had found out that my great aunt had passed way! She and I had a very good understanding about one another. Or! At least this is what I think. She was born in the 60's and grew up in the 70's and raised children in the 80's and late 90's. Which this means she had seen the epidemics that effect Harlem and other places in America. Although she is my great aunt I knew her as my aunt. The ranking system in my family is a little messed up. I'll probably discuss that in another post.

Knowing who my aunt is, it greatly saddens me that she's no longer here with us. As a spiritualist, I don’t grieve for her in ways that other people do. I grieve because I know she must have been lost and sad and scared in her transition over. Well, it was more of a…….I know she has rather than a must have. Earlier that day I decided to paint a picture of a bear. On my down time I like to practice my watercolor painting.

I was scrolling though the gram and I happen to see an oil painting that I really like and though that I could do it in watercolor. try my skills out. Sharpen them.

Once I was able to go my little room and started sketching the bear. I felt this magnetic pull. I just assumed that it was me bing hyper focused. Or! That I was inspired by (Keisha) the stray abrasive cat that meows so loudly outside the defact. But as I sketched, the magnetism grew stronger and stronger and I would see is my aunt in my head. I thought that she may have been talking that stuff about me.

The falling out that I have with my great aunt goes way back to when I was homeless. Which I do think is very petty. I was house hopping at the time and had very little to myself. I was depressed and defensive and trusted no one and took whatever help I could at the time.

I felt abandoned and very unloved. which is why I love my spirits and the Orisha. These two power house has had my back so much and has gotten me through so many dark times in my life that I'm just like. I love you more than the members who are alive. Having this deep spiritual bond and connection. Means that for my safety, things are known about people. Information becomes extremely clear. So that no matter what I was never caught off guard by anyone. I'm not blaming anyone or anything. I'm mearly stating facts about my spiritual experience.

As I started the actual painting. I looked over and decided to use my gouache paint over my watercolor paints. The good stuff. So I started to paint and I just began to make it more and more detailed. Moments after, I get a call from my sister stating that I was right! That my aunt had died. (I had told my sister that I sensed DEATH and that I had thought it was my great Aunt)

I knew my aunt like to dabble in things that were no good for her. I also knew that she was a women who needed help, therapy and concealing. Don’t get me wrong, She was not one of those people who you could not have around you. She was. She was very much so the life of the party. She would make you laugh and had a way of bringing you in to her energy. It was sad to know that this light of hers had been put out. And the fact that It was done by her own hand bothers me.

This food for thought over hea!!!! Has been the seed to my whole existence. I learned that we all may experience the same thing. But take different slices from it.

This experience has became more & more prevalent to me. Especially when I would do readings on the street in Union square just for fun. You know, you have to keep your skills sharp. And I have to say. That, I would get some people who would debate the meaning of things with me. As if I did not know what I was talking about. For instance, in this sharpening of skills, I sat across the street from Starbucks, in, union square park. Directly in front of a statue where there's a mother holding her hungering child. "At least that's what I can remember, I'm in Africa right now" so my mind is pre occupied with Army stuff.

a few years back. I would sit there in Union square and be soo outlandish and boisterous. Loudly chanting "Reading, Reading.... do you care to be read. Do you care to know what the future holds!?" This I could tell you, that the spirits were on my mutha Fuckin back! Okay!!!! The energy was strong! I was feeling spicy and saucy. Talking my shit, doing, my shit! I loved every minute of it.

In all of that energy, moving and grooving I attracted a middle aged Asian woman who was looking for clarity. Clarity that she most definitely found with me. I do not remember all of the details of her reading. And since I don’t know her name and have not posted her picture. I will talk about her case. lol I have my own moral code when I do my readings. For me, one of them is that I will not share people information unless strictly given clear authority to do so, with other people who can figure out who it is. I respect people boundaries. It's a two may street here. Not only is the person being read is vulnerable. But! Also the reader! We take on so much of the bad JuJu and the emotional dump that comes with people opening up to us.

In all, this women comes to me and sits down at the table the park has already provided. And rightfully so, questions me about what it is that I do. Which is fair. I mean I am a whole stranger in a park in New York city that she does not know. I mean, It's a hustle city! Where you have to hustle or be hustled. But! I digress. After she completes her interrogation. She stops moving and locks eyes with me. I could tell, she was ready to ask her question and get an answers.

The process in which I divinate, so that the person feels more at ease. Is, I ask them to ask the question loudly in there heads and only think of that one question. And that question specifically. If not! I'll get the two questions. Even if you asked the question in a variety of ways. It will be confusing and you wont get a clear response to whats been asked. And yes the cards will reflect that for me. Every reader has his, hers or theirs own way of doing things. lol (I'm trying my best to be inclusive)

As I shuffle my cards; Locked into her energy. psychically pulling her thoughts and wonders into my cards. I throw a hand. "Now! the deets get blurry because this story happened so long ago!" But! Long story short I was on the money. I knew what she wanted to know and I have clarified it for her. The first part of her reading I do remember confirming something I could have never known about her. And that she was impressed. She did not live a normal life or have a normal type of career. At least, whats not normal for NYC. Towards the end of her reading. She and I butted heads because of semantics. She did't like how I was using certain words to define how she understood and experienced her life.

Ultimately, the reading closed out and she paid me. But I was perturbed that she challenged me on what I felt and saw for her. After all I was the reader. But this was a clear lesson and a win for my future readings. & that win is, I should choose my words very carefully. Not everyone will understand things in the way that I will.

Back then I really thought I was hot shit. I mean, I was and still am. I'm very skilled in my craft. However, I though to myself all those years ago, I'm an Empath and getting the information in 3 ways. & I learned, not right away mind you. that with all of the way I can magically, spiritually gather information. Does not me I can dictate how someone is experiencing something. That it does not mean that I can change the narrative of how they feel it, think it and even live it.

She wanted to get my information at the end. But! I said "No" At this point in my life I was not as humble as I am now. I did not live for the sake of knowledge. I lived to be right! I lived for power. Being a psychic vampire and casting spells because I could. I was just a menace. Not all psychic vampires are bad! I mean we exchange energy all the time. And most of the time, when doing readings.

I didn’t like how I would not want to finish or even start one. Because of the energy exchange. I'm more emotionally mature now. So I know to clean myself every other day. Or every day. Little do people know they are doing magic or spiritual practices everyday and don’t even know it. I have to go now. I have to ask a Ugandan about some hash browns.

Just a reminder that the people you look to for information and advice on religious practices, witchcraft, and other aspects of the spiritual are primarily sharing from a place of personal experience as well as their own values and ethics. This means that not everything one person shares or emphasizes will be relevant to you or vibe with you. That doesn’t automatically make them or you wrong. It just means that aspects of their teachings isn’t for you and you’re welcome to ignore it. Take what works for you and leave behind what doesn’t. Also learn from and engage with multiple people so you are exposed to different perspectives and possibilities. 

Bring it on, 2023. May the new year be kind to you.