Eddie: I'm Going Through Life Like A Duck, Majestic On Top And Kicking Like Hell Underneath

Eddie: I'm going through life like a duck, majestic on top and kicking like hell underneath

Robin, holding a camera: and here we see the Eddie in its natural habitat, focusing energy into opening a bag of sustenance

Eddie: WHY THE FUCK WON'T THIS CHIP BAG OPEN

Robin: it seems to be having trouble

Eddie: FUCK OFF

Robin:

Robin: let's move on to the elusive Steve, who seems to have not slept for two days!

Eddie: I tried to write 'I'm a functional adult' but my phone changed it to 'fictional adult' and I feel like that's more accurate

Eddie is live-streaming one evening when Steve comes into the room looking for his sunglasses. They are on top of his head, but more importantly, Steve is shirtless and he has a towel around his waist.

Eddie jokingly says, “You know, during Covid there was this trend where people would come into the room while their partners were in a zoom meeting and drop their towel to get a reaction.”

“What, like this?”

Eddie just barely registers being hit in the head with Steve’s towel before he’s scrambling for his phone, “Steve, I’m live str- you asshole.”

Steve’s wearing swim shorts and he’s laughing so hard that he has tears in his eyes. Eddie throws the towel back at him, making Steve laugh more.

He asks, “For my modesty?”

Eddie, trying not to smile back, says, “For your fucking modesty, dude.”

Eddie: You have Crayons?

Steve: Yes, I have-

Eddie: You're- how old are you?

Steve: YES I AM AN ADULT AND I HAVE CRAYONS, I HAVE A BOX OF EMERGENCY CRAYONS IN THE CABINET UNDER THE TV BECAUSE EVERYBODY NEEDS CRAYONS SOMETIMES, OKAY? EVERYBODY NEEDS CRAYONS

Eddie: this world is dark and cold and everyone dies alone

Robin: I'm sorry Steve didn't kiss you goodbye this morning, but we had to go to work