First Day As A Second Century Warlord I Have My Men Tie Branches To Their Horses Tails To Stir Up Dust

first day as a second century warlord i have my men tie branches to their horses’ tails to stir up dust and make it look like there’s a lot of us but i forget it just rained so there isn’t any dust and the enemy can clearly see there’s like twenty of us all spread out in a line

I love a good moat but they're mostly decorative since levitate person entered the public domain

sigh

“I love the way the player’s body moves in Bloodborne: You can fly in any direction like that, like a nervous little bird. If you want to be close, you are instantly close, and if you want to be away, you are instantly away. What a gift. Of course everything is violent and wants to touch you, but if you are perfect, you will not be touched. There is a little secret here which perhaps you can notice: When the ugly monster’s limbs reach out to touch the small human’s body, there is about a tenth of a second—maybe less— where her body is invincible. It doesn’t even matter if she’s geometrically in harm’s way or not. She is safe because she timed it right, was perfect. See, even in this very hard game, there is something wonderful and fair: The game doesn’t care about the way bodies actually intersect. If your timing was correct, it agrees: “You were not touched.” Many games hide that tiny moment of invincibility within quick movement, and it feels so kind just knowing, no mater how bad you are, that if you could fit every moment of pain in that one tenth of a second you could be invincible for the rest of your life. Sometimes I wish I had this power in real life. If I had it would mean never having to say ‘no’ in so many words, nor the confrontation that sometimes comes with saying no. But that perfect, flawless dodge is not sustainable—you have to be devastated so many times to get the timing so flawless. And here’s my bad secret: when I killed this one monster, I didn’t do it by dodging flawlessly, but by mashing some awful weapon in her side while her limbs were flailing and she could not hit me back. Unfair and problematic of me, I know. So often, games’ expressive qualities are limited to the violent motion of virtual bodies, yet they can be extremely articulate within that vocabulary. As much as I want to be an untouchable angel of forgiveness and grace with a bottomless well of compassion for all living things, I keep messing up that dodge and I think it’s making me a bitch.”

— Aevee Bee, “I love my untouchable virtual body” (via goodbyemisery)

guy whos email is mario19 cuz he is 19 years old and when hes 20 he deletes the old mail and resigns up to every service with mario20 and when he gets to mario25 and its in use already he solidifies into a stone statue and stays in stasis for a year

Outside & Inside

i love you ellen ripley i love you original alien franchise i love you profound loneliness of being the final girl in space i love you practical humanity i love you greed is the enemy i love you unstoppable cosmic atrocity getting blown into the vacuum by a desperate, terrified woman in her underwear i love you going back for the cat going back for the little girl i love you lack of recurring characters other than the xenomorph meaning ripley’s only constant company in her whole life is her worst nightmare i love you true bravery in the face of true terror i love you janky 80s hardware i love you smoking in a spaceship i love you wet, sticky, slimy organic technology i love you heroine eventually becoming the alien i love you forced motherhood ending in infanticide i love you short hair buzz cut sweaty scared femininity i love you human emotions turned base turned raw turned dangerous i love you penetration pregnancy i love you hubris as a parasite i love you unstoppable entity i love you normal woman turned god