Boops You

boops you

could i, a devil in my own right, tempt you to come this way?

whisper to me vagaries you keep, reserved only for the late night

when you twist and squirm in succulent spring heat— sleepless;

a sweet pink, those stirrings must be as they plague your restless mind—

i, a succubus in my own right, could release you, eat them from you;

you need only let out a sigh, and succumb to the night.

sometimes the whispers

rustle the sea oats

and the music of the surf

writes its own poetry

and you realize this moment

is as good as you’ll get

to allow your heart to fly

as high as seabirds swoop

across the rising sun rays

gathering words from the wind

©️-Aubrie-2024

It’s hard to articulate during work, but I’m struggling with something. I have so many positive interactions with people and I get smiling faces and well wishes and just general conviviality and camaraderie with people at work. Even if I don’t know their name, there’s usually still a smile. I love it and am grateful for it. Having worked plenty of jobs where people just make the day miserable, this is a welcome change.

But in all of this,

I still get this hollow feeling and emptiness because the person I wish I could have these day-to-day interactions with is so far away from me and I so desperately wish and hope that we could have that.

All these mundane things, I can’t share with them. This long distance makes things so hard. It’s easy to beat myself up for choices and opportunities that could have brought me closer to them, but… life…and really, what purpose does it actually serve?

I had to spill my heart out a little bit- it’s overflowing with ache, and grief, and sadness.

All while having the backdrop of a corporate setting for my day.

What an existence.

It Hurts Until It Doesn't

I don't feel wrong anymore and I refuse to say sorry when you left me with nothing holy to fight for.

I cradled the last of my sanity in over burdened arms and looked in the mirror to see the unrecognizable as I washed away harm.

Everyday I chip away at these wretched walls, building a foundation with my own hands; starting from scratch.