If I Wrote Some Uhem Smut Would Yall Be Mad?

if 👉👈 i wrote some uhem smut 👉👈 would yall be mad?

i have a two parter in the works and i dont wanna push the limit too much 👉👈

Virgil: I have a spider, she’s clearly superior!

Remus: my rat is so much better than a puny spider!

Patton: my frog is literally adorable!

Janus: my pet snake could eat all of your pets, therefore its the best!

Roman: well, i have a Logan so i win!

all sides: *nod in agreement*

Logan, blushing: I-

me and remus share a birthday and i’m so very excited that me and my trash man are gonna have a chill day.

might mess around and write a lil’ story for him ;) might not,,,

I’m glad you liked it! <3 <3

Remus Has A Dumb Idea

tw: dumb ideas, they kiss, two/three innuendos (v. minor, like, you may have to squint to find the second), they kiss

written for @imlovethomassanders !!

“I think this is officially the dumbest thing you’ve ever done in your life!” Remus raised his eyebrow.

“You say that every time,” He pointed out, not looking up from his project.

“That’s because you baffle me with your dumbassery everytime,” Janus said.

“Be careful, if you make anymore rhymes, my brother will show up,” Remus said.

“Maybe he’ll be able to talk you out of whatever this is,” Janus paused, sighing. “I can’t believe I’m about to ask but what is this, by the way?”

“Well, you know how I love those videos of someone crushing something under a weight?” Janus nodded. “Well, I got to thinking, if i filled a coke bottle with mentos, and if I applied a great force, what would happen?”

“Pain,” Janus said. “You would get hurt.”

“I had a feeling, so that’s why i asked you to be here. So you can explain to the EMT,” Remus said. Janus almost complimented him on how well he had thought this out. “I was going to ask my brother, but I think he invited Virgil over and I really don’t want to have to interrupt that. And if I’d have asked Logan, he would tell Patton and then I’ll get chewed at the hospital.”

“So I was a last resort?”

“I’m sensing bitterness,” Remus said, looking up from his tools. “And no, you aren’t a last resort, you’re the first choice. I gotta way up pros and cons though, so I make the right choice.” Janus snorted.

“You have put an odd amount of thought into this.”

“Well, whenever I don’t, you chew me out and I’d much rather we spend our time together doing a lot more fun things,” Remus wiggled his eyebrows and Janus shook his head before a lightbulb went off.

“Could I persuade you out of doing this very stupid experiment?” Remus looked so genuinely conflicted that Janus almost felt bad. Almost.

“I literally have been unable to think of anything else for the past week.”

“Want me to take your mind off of it?” Remus pouted and Janus relented. “How about we look this up on youtube and see if anyone else has done it. Will that satisfy your need for destruction?” Remus thought about it for a minute.

“Can we cuddle?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, I’m down, but we’re gonna have to drink some of this coke,” Remus said, pointed to the bottles of coke sitting around him.

“Why did you buy so many?”

“A good scientist always double checks his results.”

“You’re not a scientist, you’re just a pain in my ass.” Janus didn’t even have to look at Remus to know he was wiggling his eyebrows. “Don’t you dare say it, or I will go home.”

“Noooo,” Remus whined, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend. “Don’t be mean. I just gave up an experiment for you.” Janus snorted.

“You mean a death match.”

“Either way, I was promised cuddles.”

“You will literally kill yourself or me with one of your ‘experiments’,” Janus said.

“Januuuuuuus, we’ve moved on!” Janus rolled his eyes.

“I could literally be dating anyone, I’m good looking, I’m smart, but for some reason my dumbass heart has decide to fall in love with you.”

“Well, it seems like a very smart decision,” Remus said, spinning Janus around so they were eye to eye. Janus placed his around on Remus’ shoulders.

“Jury’s still out on that one.” Remus only smirked and leaned in.

“Let me plead my case?” Janus chuckled but nodded and Remus kissed him softly, starting as nothing more than a peck before their lips moulded together. But almost as quickly as it started it ended and Janus opened his eyes to see Remus smiling at him and Janus’ face softened.

“You’re so cute for someone who will literally be the death of me.”

“You betcha,” Remus said with a wink. “Now, CUDDLES!”

Virgil: DAD!

Janus and Patton at the same time: yes?

Virgil: oh sh*t

Patton: Who the heck do you think you are?? I am his dad!

Janus: I raised him!

Patton: I loved him!

Virgil: oof, I actually felt that on your behalf

done :)

oh nooooo a few days ago someone very nice wrote me a thing but i didn’t get to reblog it cause my computer charger died and now i think they deleted it :(