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Ugh Jake is such a whore

make you feel it.

PAIRING 𓍯 female reader x tinder date jay & jake

GENRE 𓍯 SMUT (MDNI)

WC 𓍯 10.3k

WRNG! everyone's been drinking, humping furniture, pussy drunk jake lol, jerking off, protected sex, you three fuck in the clothes you wear, cum eating

A/N! i am a firm believer in jake the pussy eater. and THIS has now beat my writing record…. please excuse any mistakes!

jake and jay weren’t incels by any means. they were pretty well known around campus by name and face, constantly being complimented in private, on tinder and through social media comments.

jake was more sexually promiscuous than jay, but they were both pretty chill within male standards these days. jay liked having women to himself, but jake loved the idea of sharing—especially sharing women with other women. but neither of the boys were the ones who set the tinder account up, sunghoon was.

“i just think it’ll be fun.” sunghoon says with a laugh, his canines sharp. they were sitting in jays car eating burgers and fries, jay in the driver, sunghoon passenger and jake in the back. this wasn’t jays car but actually heeseungs, a nice red mazda he got passed down to him from his older brother when he changed vehicles. 

heeseung had left the car briefly to go to ‘the bathroom’, but everyone in the car had the same understanding that he only left to call his ex-fling. sunghoon was practically the match-maker of the friend group, constantly trying to make things happen for his friends while he sat in a committed (enough) relationship of one year and eight months.

sunghoon had his own phone in hand, handling the tinder account for both jake and jay with his own number. he had planned to share the account with one of the boys eventually, but not before he set it up and matched them with a few people prior.

he put everything together for the account, including the bio, names, layout and photos. jake was secretly egging sunghoon on through the process, jay being the only voice of reason besides heeseung. heeseung personally loved the idea of threesomes, and he had hinted towards them with jake a few times, but he knew how jay was, so he supported him in arguing against it. 

“i’m sure most girls are gonna ignore you guys because threesomes are quite invasive, but whoever swipes has to want it bad.” sunghoon finishes with a hearty laugh, jay shoving him with his right hand. “you’re gross.” he replies with a soft laugh, jake lifting his right eyebrow briefly with a smile. “i’m not mad at it.” jake starts, shrugging lightly before pulling another handful of fries out of the bag by his left hip.

his right hand flips through his phone aimlessly, running through tiktoks on low volume. “i’m just not sure we have the same type.” he finishes, smiling at the way jay looks over his shoulder, past sunghoon. “what are you implying? i don’t have good taste?” jay asks with an accusatory tone, annoyance in his features.

“your cuisine is amazing, i just think you pick the most boring bitches alive.” jake comments, sunghoon throwing his head back in a laugh. jay slumped back in his chair at the comment with a shrug, jake sitting up to reach forward, lightly patting him on his right shoulder with a greasy left hand. “that’s why i’m picking for the both of you.” sunghoon comments, both men looking at him.

“i trust that i can pick girls you both would like because i like both your types.” sunghoon comments with a smile, jakes left hand falling back into his lap. “i know you like someone mature with strong education,” he points at jay with his left hand,

“and i know jake likes tits.” he finishes, his left thumb pointing behind him with a light laugh as he looks back at his screen, swiping right once. “and ass.” jake adds with a laugh, jay rolling his eyes as sunghoon turns back to look at him briefly. jay spits a mean “yall are lucky to not have std’s with these mindsets.” before heeseung suddenly shows up at the back left door of jays temporary driver seat. “i’m not convinced they don’t have any.” heeseung comments with a smile, the car interrupting into laughter—surprisingly from sunghoon and jake.

“but sorry for leaving, had to make a phone call.” “yea, we know.” sunghoon replies with an eye roll, heeseungs right hand balling up into a fist. sunghoon looks back briefly before cowering playfully, heeseung hitting him with a stiff armed punch. “i’m constantly being abused in this friend group.” sunghoon said through his fake winching, a laugh rolling out of everyone’s mouths again.

• • •

"no, pass!" your blonde roommate yelled at the tv screen mirroring your phone. you don’t spare a second glance swiping to the left as your roommates laughed at once. "he looks like he's into poop fetishes." she continued to comment as the screen refreshed to another boy, his hair long and shaggy. he had a scene kid aesthetic, something your shorter roommate to the right of you fawned at, the other roommate screaming for you to disrespectfully pass again.

you had recently moved into a new house with your roommates from last year, four of you in total. besides the small normal arguments the four of you would have at times, you got along very well.

you guys would sometimes meet up during the weekdays to have quality house meetings, usually consisting of setting up rules for the household, or informing the house of upcoming visitors. but sometimes the house would bring up the different boys and girls on and near campus, pushing the house to either start looking through instagram accounts, or on dating apps.

you and two of your roommates occupied the living room area as your other roommate stayed upstairs on a facetime call. you and your one blonde roomate were on the couch in the middle of the room, your other roommate on a little seat to the right of you as you all faced the television on the wall. you were all wearing varying casual outfits, all slowly waiting for summer to really kick in after finishing classes. you wore a baggy t-shirt with shorts, your roommate to the left in a crop top and booty shorts, roommate to the right in a hoodie and sweatpants.

“honestly, the guys on this app aren't too bad.” your roommate to the right commented, her large glasses falling down her low-bridged nose as she sat cross-legged. “i was expecting way worse.” she finished with a laugh, her deep brown hair cut into a short bob, eyes monolid. she uses her phone in her right to emphasise her speech, her lock screen flashing on and off. “that's what i’m saying!” your white blonde roommate to your left commented, her thick hair in a messy high bun as her right index pointed over you in agreeance. you silently agreed with both girls, a smile on your face before swiping left again without looking for too long.

“i’m still not that impressed.” you commented with a soft smile before your tallest, deep brown skinned roommate walked in from the left to the kitchen, hair covered in a bonnet. she was wearing her pyjamas, a small tank top and booty shorts, the outfit tight on her slim frame but matching your other roommate. her phone was in hand on call, all three of you lightly looking to the left to greet her. “hey ladies!” she commented with a smile, her invisalign giving her a small lisp.

you looked at the screen for a second to swipe left on another dud again, looking back at her without seeing the next swipe.

“brooo, who is that?!” her left arm points, the phone in her right nearly dropping at the shift in movement. everyone's heads jerk towards the television screen, voices screaming in shock. the blonde beside you nearly hurts herself as she jumps off the couch, snatching the phone out of your hands.

“no you have to say yes!” she screams, her right hand holding your phone in the air as her head whips towards you from the tv. your eyes peel from watching your phone in her hand to look, mouth open.

Jake Jay, 22

Yes theres two of us. No were not dating. Yes we both swiped on you. No were not catfishing. Just trynna have fun this summer. Jay is 22, im 22 in november 🥳

“no fucking way they’re real?!” you commented, your left hand reaching out for your phone. when your roommate doesn’t give the phone back in time, you practically snatch it, lightly apologising. “i’m sorry hon, but i need to see.” you commented as you all looked at the photos with open mouths. you watched your phone, the girls watching you swipe through the big screen.

the first photo was a selfie of both of them from slightly below, bangs in ones face. neither of them were smiling, the one on the right with longer hair in an overgrown haircut. his lips were pink and thick, a light pout on his face as his brown bangs curved lightly into his eyes. the left had a strong jaw with tanner skin, his features sharper. his hair was freshly cut and styled back—forehead showing.

“oh my god they’re so fine!” your newly joined roommate commented, everyone including you laughing. you swiped right in the middle of the screen to see more photos.

the second photo was both of them at a party, a south asian girl in the middle of them with two empty tequila bottles in her hands. she looked wasted beyond belief and so did they, a line of text from snapchat updating on who jake was, who jay was, and how her name was rosa. you hoped she wasn’t going to be an issue for you later, praying she was just a very casual party-goer and not someone’s ex. 

“okay so jake’s the one with the lips, and jay’s the one with the jawline. got it.” the blond comments as she reads the text, your bob haired roommate pointing to jay with a manicured left index finger. “i like him, he’s hot. is this a two for one?” she asks with expressive hands, her right hand dropping her phone into her lap as she uncrosses her legs.

“they want a threesome?!” your bonneted roommate comments with an exaggerated reaction, leaning over. her eyes are wide and so is her mouth, her right hand now at her side as she walks around the kitchen counter to step closer as you slid to the next slide. the next slide is of the two of them in the bathroom, a third in the shower.

one of them—jake—was sitting on the toilet with his pants on holding up two peace signs, jay sat on the floor with a large bowl between his legs with a pout. there's someone in the shower, leaning forward with his upper body. his face and upper body is in frame, dripping wet. his eyebrows are thick, features sharp. he’s just as handsome as the other two in the photo, faint dimples in his smiling face.

“fuck, i want him too!” you playfully yelled as the room erupts in shocked laughter, your blonde roommate clapping. “this is too good you have to say yes.” she commented with a smile, shaking her head in disbelief. “yea you gotta see what's up with those two. have to.” your deep brown roommate commented one last time as she squints lightly at the screen, moving to go back upstairs to her room. “any updates, yall better call me.” she comments before looking back one last time, her phone screen off as she runs upstairs, her footsteps heavy as she skips steps.

you swipe to the right with no hesitation, suddenly growing disappointed you didn’t look at them for longer. if you didn’t match with them, that might’ve been the last time you’d ever see them. 

“hopefull—” IT’S A MATCH!

“no fucking way!” your bob hair cut roommate screamed as she jumped out of her seat, the room erupting in noise once again. “what?! what happened?!” your third roommate yelled from upstairs, her voice muffed lightly. “she matched with jake and jay!’ your blonde friend commented playfully with a light laugh as she ran around the left side of the couch to yell up the stairs a few feet away.

“y/n better do it or i’m done with her!” she comments back playfully, her voice bouncing off the walls. you laugh at the comment, your face looking at the ‘send a message’ prompt at the bottom of your screen. “i can’t promise you anything!” you yelled from your spot on the couch.

you were a prune in the eyes of your roommates and friends, barely entertaining men past a hello and gentle conversation. you were so confident about not entertaining men that your parents thought you were waiting for the right moment to come out as a lesbian. you did like girls, but it wasn’t your only choice. you couldn’t lie though, the ‘we will always love and support you’ speech was funny to sit through.

you truly wanted to have more fun this summer, and this would probably be one of the first instances you’d actually be interested in doing something. “i’m just scared about doing things with two guys.” you commented out loud, the blonde stepping up from the couch to walk towards the kitchen.

“hopefully the dicks aren’t trash.” she commented as she looked through the top cabinets for some chips to eat. “check the far left cabinet by the fridge. theres some doritos there.” your other roommate commented to her searching, a thin smile on the blondes face at her keen eye as she turned around.

“thank you queen.” she comments with a laugh before reaching to the second shelf with a small jump.

"well i'm not messaging if there's two of them and one of me. if they want me, they gotta message me first." you defensively commented to the room, both your roommates agreeing in unison.

"fair." your blonde roommate commented, your smaller roommate watching as she walked around to sit back down at the couch, holding her left hand out.

“hopefully we see some other cute guys before i lose faith i’ll find someone myself.” she commented with a laugh, the blond just passing the bag over instead. 

• • •

Hi y/n! Its jake. I saw you swiped on us and i thought we should talk. How r u?

your mouth would’ve touched the floor if you were a cartoon character. your thumbs hovered over the keyboard, mind full yet so empty. they were cute, that was a given. you knew what their intentions were, so there was no use in acting confused or making small talk in your opinion, at least not on tinder.

hey cutie

i’m good, how r u!

you didn’t know if this would go over well, and the moment you sent both messages the shame settled in. what if they didn’t really like you that much? you were scared about putting yourself out too much, especially in front of pretty attractive men like them. they probably had both men and women alike fawning over them, why would you spread yourself thin?

Im so good, im so happy u swiped. Didnt think youd like us

‘didn’t think you’d like them? impossible.’ you couldn’t help but smile at the messages, shaking your head lightly in disbelief as you typed back, smirking.

bullshit. you know you’re sexy

its like word vomit. this wasn't like you at all, and you felt it in the way your stomach would drop every time you saw jake typing. you'd close the app completely just to open it up again the moment you heard that exciting small notification. why would he message you if he weren't interested? he was answering back so fast you could tell he didn't even close the app before typing again.

Haha yea

Not just for me tho. U think jays cute too right

he continues to spam you. it's weirdly charming to you; a smile on your face as you imagine the speed of his typing fingers.

I message for the both of us

We're a duo

'he responds so fast he's practically begging' you playfully commented in your head with a smile, your head tilting to the left as you thought up a response. you didn't want to sound desperate, but you did want him to know you were interested in anything they wanted to do—if that were their intentions.

yes you're both really attractive

at this point, you were getting excited. you played it off pretty well, but it would be a lie to say you didn’t care about the way jake texted back fast.

U promise?

Do you wanna meet up

Just so we can talk in person?

you started to think jake probably liked you more than jay did. maybe jake was the only one who would actually check the account, or even swipe on the different profiles. regardless you were okay with only jake entertaining you, maybe the account was shared just for efficiency.

sure. do u live near the uni? we could get food at the plaza

you usually didn’t plan to meet up with guys so soon, but you already had plans, and if they really wanted to connect with you, they’d make the effort to at least see you once before you went on an actual date.

Tell me the time and were there.

Can i have ur number?

it felt sudden. but it also made sense. tinder was truly only used to connect, pushing you to move elsewhere if you truly wanted to chat and meet up personally. you were grown, this wasn’t something new to you.

sure! i’ll send it in a separate text so its easy to copy and paste.

• • •

you had been sharing your location with your roommates for months at this point, so you didn't bother reminding them to either come for you or call the police if they didn't hear from you. they knew not to bother texting because you'd have your notifications off, so you gave them a time, ten o’clock pm.

you had everything of importance on you, your phone, a charger and wallet in a little bag you wore over the shoulder. you had already bought a few articles of clothing, your forever twenty-one bag on your left shoulder before sitting down in the food court at a four seat table. you swung the bag to the seat to your left to leave the seats in front of you clear, pushing both boys to have to sit across from you if they showed up.

you had texted jake about meeting you near the left entrance side of the cafeteria, describing the colour of your t-shirt. you wore a comfortable outfit—boyfriend jeans and a tight pink t-shirt, your time for meetup passing. you thought you had been stood up—which was fine—so you started to look around for food places to hide the shame filling your stomach.

that was, until two hands pounced on your shoulders from behind, a jolt running up your spine as you dropped your phone on the table in front of you. “hi, y/n!” a light male voice came from behind. the friendliness took you aback as you looked up to your right to see jake from tinder, a smile so big on his face you’d think y'all were childhood friends.

he was such an open book in his texting, so it made sense he’d be even nicer in public. you shifted right out of your seat to give a friendly hug, noticing the male to his left as you gave a soft pat to his back before pulling away.

“hi, i’m jay. we didn’t really get to talk before.” the male beside him commented, a sweet eye smile on his face. he was even prettier in person—both of them were. they both smelt good, but jake smelt more like a clean body scent, jay nicely coated in cologne. jake’s outfit matched yours, his jeans baggy and grey, his t-shirt black and loosely fitting.

jay on the other hand had on slim jeans with a loose dress shirt, the buttons left open to his mid chest. he had a gold chain on with gold rings on his left thumb and right middle finger, jakes jewellery starting and stopping at a simple silver curb chain around his pale neck.

“i didn’t think you guys would show up.” you commented before hesitating in front of jay. he notices the pause, his right arm reaching out to invite you for a hug. you take it, your right cheek close to his neck. “usually i’d prefer a more formal first meeting,” jay commented with the pull away, a smile creeping up your face.

“so would i,” you lightly comment, not wanting to give too much information about yourself. you and jake only really picked this spot because of his eagerness to meet you in person, and because you didn’t really trust them yet, so you wanted an audience just incase.

“i wanted to shop for some things and thought something casual would break the throuple ice.” you commented, jake smiling. he moves closer slightly, the visual of how close you three are to each other catching the eye of bystanders.

“i respect it, it makes sure you have witnesses in case we were catfishing and vice versa.”

“i could never be a catfish.” you replied to jakes comment with a laugh, jay smiling softly at the comment as you moved to your bag. “i’m still planning on picking up a few things, if you guys want to join me.” you commented as you hoisted the bag over your shoulder.

“sure, i can hold your bag if you’d like?” jay commented with his left hand out, jake walking around to stand before both of you guys to look at the burger spot closest to you three. you smiled at jays words before letting the bag roll off your shoulder, jays hand catching it to exchange it onto his own.

“man i want a burger.” jake comments with his hands on his hips from behind jay, a laugh leaving his lips before he turns towards him

 “personally i want thai.” he comments with his eyes wandering, your right hand pointing to the back right section of the food court. “there’s something over on that side you might like.”

 • • •

the three of you got along like friends. the conversation easy to hold. jay actively participated in your shopping experience. he would listen to you and pick things out, jake following behind without care. he would make funny comments while slyly liking and matching with other girls on their shared tinder profile. he liked your energy, but he didn’t feel the pull from you that you’d want something more than this—friendship.

he did find you attractive, and whenever the three of you stood too close he’d silently manifest jay pushing his lip into yours to test the waters. you seemed to interact with them like they were your guy friends, and jake was scared all those texts and plans built up only lead up to this.

“i think we should plan a proper date for the three of us,” jake blurts out, both you and jay trailing off your conversation to look back at him. “something formal and romantic.” he finished, you three standing in a corner of the store garage, sifting through a rack of cropped shirts.

jay is taken aback by this, remembering how profusely jake and sunghoon insisted their interactions with you be solely sexual. he scoffed a little at the comment, the action not missed by you or jake. “i just mean,” jake started up again, trying to distract from the way jay looked off, his left hand lazily pushing through clothes on the rack in front of him as he faced you two. “sexual relationships are built through some level of trust,”

‘he’s got to be bullshitting’ you thought in as you watched jays reaction through the corner of your eye. “and i know i’m physically attracted to you.” he begins again, your ears perking at the admission. “but us doing this is kid shit. only teens on a date would walk around stores together picking out clothes.” he finishes, slight bite in his words but you get it.

it is childish to do this over going on an actual date, but you wanted to check if they were really valid people, not wanting to waste your time. “i know.” you agreed with him, breaking eye contact as you looked down in an attempt to find the right words. 

“i just wanted to make sure you guys were actually real, honest people before throwing myself into a dangerous situation like a private date.” you replied, jake nodding as your eyes rose to meet his face again.

“i totally get it, trust me.” he said with his hands up, his phone between his right hands index and thumb, screen littered in notifications. “i’m not mad we did this.” he replied, his hair practically bouncing with his expressive way of talking. “but now that we know each other, we need to get out of these friendship activities and move like people who’re actually dating.”

jay finally checks back into the conversation, smiling softly at jake’s words before thinking of a way to chime in. “i agree.” he starts, pulling away from the rack to lean his body weight into his right hip. “i’m attracted to you as well, so i think it’s worth going on an actual date.” he finishes, his eyes on jake as he spoke, watching how jake’s face lit up with him agreeing.

“i’m sure it’s obvious i’m attracted to you both, no?” you spoke lightly, your tone still uncertain. you didn’t want to lean too much into trusting them, especially since you found them on tinder, but if they could play you well enough then you’d entertain them well enough. “even if you’re just trying to get into my pants,” you trail off, your eyes searching the racks to calm your sudden nerves. “i’m fine with going on an actual date, but don’t expect me to pay.” you playfully commented, knowing better. 

“oh we weren’t thinking of doing that. i got money for me and you babygirl, trust.” if jake were a puppy his tail would fly off with this level of excitement. he steps closer at the agreement between all three of you, your heartbeat almost in your ears. ‘wait—did he just call me babygirl?’ you thought for a little with frowned brows. you hoped your face didn’t seem too excited.

“are you free tomorrow night? you want italian?”

• • •

were you wearing your best black bra and panty set? perhaps.

did you pick a skimpy short dress with a low cut just to show cleavage? maybe.

did you shave? of course.

you were completely hairless from the neck down after your shower, your roommates more than aware of your plans when they realised just how long you were in there.

you had exfoliated the night you got back from the mall meet up, giving every single detail about the two boys to your roommates who all sat around, listening so attentively you were almost taken aback.

you could remember the light scent of jake’s skin, describing how excited he seemed for the date. you described how he not only said he wanted to date to get to know you better but also how he said he was ‘attracted to you’ and called you ‘babygirl’ while insisting he’d never make you pay after you commented playfully.

“you’re fucking lying.” your tallest roommate commented playfully, her right hand pointing at you.

“i wish i was, i swear.” you pleaded, your eyes scanning everyone’s faces.

“freudian slip, he didn’t wanna say it but he got caught up in your beauty.” your blond roommate commented, the room erupting in laughs and confused faces.

“you’re so corny!” your bobbed hair roommate commented with a laugh.

you described how jay smelt, how uniquely masculine he was. you could barely put the words together to describe how he smelt and acted. your roommates playfully moaned in response of your retelling, each break in your sentences leaving room for noise.

your short haired roommate would roll her eyes playfully, her hands in the air. “i literally need him in me right now.” she commented before grabbing her own hair in playful agony, everyone laughing.

to say you were excited was an understatement.

especially with how much time you spent making your makeup and hair look good.

jake had scarily video called you while you were shaving previously, your razer sitting on your upper inner right thigh. you didn’t answer, for multiple obvious reasons. you decided you’d call him later making some bullshit excuse.

you didn’t know why he couldn’t text you, but that was when your brain started doomsday thinking. you got nervous. you thought he was probably cancelling and it would be for some embarrassing reason.

not embarrassing for him—for you. you started to convince yourself he only suggested the date to get out of conversation early that day, overthinking the way jay looked at him as he admitted he was attracted to you.

but now the time was here, and the texts from jake were only positive.

jake 🥰

Just texting to remind u we come @ 8

Wear ur best

Not an obligation

Just be comfortable

Love you

Sorrh

Sorry*

Im just joking i dont actually love u im not crazy i promise

you are honestly shocked you had been so nervous. jake was so pathetic through text it was almost too good to be true. he was smart as hell and held conversation very well, but he also played around which made your conversations very entertaining but also hard to read.

jay was a lot less invasive in messages, barely messaging you if at all. you started to feel like jake was truly the only one that actually liked you fully out of the two of them. it hurt your pride, but you didn't let it get into your head too much.

when jake rang your phone while standing at the front door comically with jay on his right side—you jumped. 

“girl let me at least open the door.” your tallest deep brown roommate commented, comically leaning to the side with her eyebrows raised to try and get a peak through the front door. “i will die if you escort me out of this house like a worried mother, no!” you commented back with a smile, muffled laughter coming from your roommates so loudly the blonde had to run upstairs, cupping her mouth in a show. 

you wore a simple fitting black dress that ended mid thigh. it rode up constantly—and you were scared at times of your boobs slipping up and out—but your small over-the-shoulder purse matched it so well. you wore stiletto heels, hoping to everything you loved that you wouldn’t fall flat on your face.

jay and jake were both wearing dress pants and well fitted shirts, jay in all black as jake’s shirt was a light pink, pants a deep grey. both of them wore well tailored clothes, their shoes expensive, jay with a belt.

jay had on a expensive watch, not like you knew the brand—nor did you care—but it was definitely not a regular watch. they had a lot of money, almost too much. you started to speculate if they were pornstars when you saw them, moving to hug the both of them—starting with jay.

jay hugged softly, his arms awkwardly over yours as he tried to be respectful. your purse was barely hanging onto your right shoulder so you appreciated it. you pulled away to look at him and lightly glance at his shirt, hoping no makeup touched the fabric before stepping right to give jake a hug as well. 

“you look lovely.” jay commented with a smile, jake side eyeing him in a smirk before diving into a deeper hug, his arms wrapping around your waist. his chin was in your neck with the hug, and you couldn’t help but hold your breath. “thank you.” you commented finally as jake pulled away, your eyes looking at jay. 

jay and jake both stepped back together with a shared glance as you walked between them, jay to your left, jake on your right. you looked great, and it was definitely a contrast from the day before. jake truly just wanted to look at your ass but jay held his eye contact with him tight. “bro go get the car door.” he ordered as jake snorted once, holding his left hand out for the keys behind your back. jake’s arm hooped over your head as he walked to the car, the keys thrashing around in his hand.

there was a mercedes benz c-class sedan, which you understood was jay’s. one press of a button on the keys woke the car up, the side mirrors moving and positioning themselves as the car started. “birthday gift.” jay commented with a smile at the light shock in your face, smiling. his right hand lightly pressed into your lower back to push you forward and you walked willingly. his left hand hovered in front, incase you needed help stepping down from your house. 

you took the hand in your own, his hands soft as they shifted under your palm to hold you better. his right hand moved to your side as you both stepped down towards the car, jake holding the passenger seat door open as it faced your house. the moment you were in the car jake lightly closed it behind you, immediately speaking.

“she looks so good.” jake commented with a shake of his head for emphasis, jay smiling lightly as he looked into the window at you briefly.

“dude calm down before she hears you.” he comments softly, knowing his own car like the back of his hand.

“don’t care, i’d eat her right now.” jake replied before stepping back, assuming that would make it harder for you to hear.

your eyes shot forward at the comment, jake’s innocent persona quickly changing in your head as you watched jay walk around the hood of the car with a laugh.

he lightly but firmly ripped the door open before sliding in, the car lightly shaking as he started the car with one push of a button, pocketing the keys. the engine roared lightly as jake slid in from behind, moving to sit in the middle of the back seats so he could feel closer to you two.

“where are we going?” jay asked as his right hand absentmindedly ran up the wheel to grip at the top, looking out his side mirror.

“i don’t know, i’m cool with anything as long as i get eaten.” you commented boldly, jake freezing in his seat. jay laughs out loud at your reply, his head turning to look at you.

“that's great,” he starts with another small laugh before looking back. “any location suggestions on where she can get eaten?” jay teases with a shit-eating grin, his eyebrows raised. you can’t help but laugh, your roommates watching through the windows as they speculate.

“come back here and i’ll show you.” jake comments with a smile, jay looking forward with a stern head shake. “not in my car you won’t.” jay comments as he side eyes you playfully, ripping a laugh out of you. once your laugh dies down, your face dropped slightly, eyes hooded. you looked back at jake who’s sat with his hands between his parted legs, bottom lip caught between his teeth in a smile.

he shifts his hips towards you a bit spreading his legs further. your eyes catch the movement, jake’s eyes catching you. jay peels off driving down your residential street, a sly smile on your lips as you finally sat forward again.

• • •

you three thought against going out for dinner. jay was amazing at cooking and jake wasn’t really up for being out in public unnecessarily again. he clearly just recommended it to get you three into one location where at least one bed was open for use. jake had eaten dinner at four o’clock. he wasn’t starving by any means. he could eat something light, but there were so many more important actions you three could do.

jay had planned for you three to eat steak with fettuccine alfredo, trying to avoid anything too extravagant. he had also picked out some of his favourite gins and wines, letting jake pick and choose what the three of you would be drinking. they had a wifi tv right by the kitchen that could easily be seen at all points of the living room, background noise playing as a random reality show begins.

heeseung and sunghoon had gone out to go drinking at their favourite pub, their cars left at home. it was pretty early for them to be out drinking, but you couldn’t talk. you three had gone through three—going on four—gin mixed drinks at this point. they were honestly amazing, expensive gins being a lot smoother than other drinks in the same alcohol percentage bracket. while jay was still teetering within the ‘tipsy’ range, you and jake were drunk, hot and loud.

jake insisted on helping cook the steak, you and jay unnecessarily preparing the sauce for the pasta together. their kitchen was surprisingly big, the stove and sink apart from each other—the sink in the middle of a counter island. the fridge was on the right side of the stove you three faced, indicating the end of the kitchen area as the living room was off to the left.

jay steps you through everything, even the grating of the different cheeses and putting the pasta in a boiling pot. “you might as well just fuck her.” jake spits out in slight jealousy, watching how jays chest pushes into your back as he practically drapes himself over you. jake had long gone stopped focusing on the steak, turning the temperature down to buy himself more time.

“you’d like watching that, wouldn’t you?” jay teases, his arms slipping from between your arms. you’re a little dazed by the comment, partially because of the alcohol, but also because of how objectifying it all felt.

you lean forward into the counter with your elbows, innocently but aggressively pushing your ass into jays groin. it shoves him backwards, his right hand coming up to strike the left side of ass once. you jolt a bit, looking to your left to watch how jakes eyes practically glow.

“oh fuck yea!” jake responds at the smack, following jays lead. he steps forward enough to where his hand can reach before slamming his hand down on the opposite cheek.

“ow!” you yell, your facial expression a mixture of angry brows and a smile. “oh, you hurt her.” jay comments playfully in response, his left hand coming up to swat at jake. he moves back with a laugh, holding himself as his eyes turn crescent shaped. when jays hand falls, his right hand hand lightly caresses up and down the sides of your bum. it’s more soothing than arousing, but you bite your lip nonetheless.

this doesn’t slip past jake at all, who motions once with a nod in your direction, motioning jay to check what he sees. jay shyly looks at your expression with a small tilt to the left, almost making eye contact before slipping back into place behind you. he makes eye contact with jake deviously before thrusting against you once as a tease. jake giggles at the action before finally looking back at the steak he was supposed to be watching.

the mood has shifted in the room, you slowly pulling yourself up with the palms of your hands. jake finds a fork to lazily flip the massive steak with, against jays pleads for a proper utensil.

you’re not hungry anymore. if anything this gin in your system has made you insatiably horny, disappointed in the way jay finally leaves your frame. he focused on mixing the pasta and sauce into the large saucepan he had picked out.

between the two boys you knew you had a better shot at seducing jake fully than jay. theres a pout in his lips, more than apparent, but jay was focused on getting everything ready for you guys.

once jay pushes jake out of the way to properly take care of the steak cooking way too slowly, you decide to take your chance. jake walks over to your with a smirk on his face, your posture fixing to accommodate his height. your left arm swings over his neck playfully, fully expecting to only hold onto him as you both waited.

jake doesn’t waste anymore time than necessary, leaning forward to push a kiss into your left cheek. it’s kind of sloppy, a little bit of spit on your cheek as he pulls away, but it’s enough for you to kiss him back, right under his right eye by his nose. jake’s lips chase yours, finally landing one soft smooch on your lips before pulling away, your arm opening with the distance.

“your lips are so pretty.” you compliment absentmindedly, your head tilting to the left as you study his features. “thank you.” he lightly speaks before his right hand finds your left cheek. you don’t bother letting him control your movements before pushing your lips into his, both your arms wrapping around his neck carelessly.

he kisses you slow but passionately, you both slightly panting through each break in the kiss. jake wiggles his other hand to cup the other side of your face, a vice grip on your jaw. jay glances to his right to watch you two, the soft wet noises of both of your lips nearly echoing in his ears.

he doesn't interrupt, silently looking between you two and the steak—the pasta sitting abandoned in the cheese sauce. he takes the steak out of the pan so it isn't overcooked, moving close to you two to pick up the cutting board. by this point, jay had turned the stove tops off, everything out just needing a good plating.

you're held between the counter and jake's body as you reach out for jays affection with an open right hand. jay takes it momentarily to kiss your open palm, holding your fingers straight.

you lightly 'hmm' at the action, jay pulling away to wash his hands at the sink. he grabs a knife from a drawer on the left side of the sink, pushing the drawer closed as the kiss with jake lightly smudges your light layer of foundation. jakes hips rock into yours once, a hardened print against your frame.

he moves to the left side of your face, kissing down your jaw and neck. his hands roughly explore your waist, the drag of his hands lifting the skirt of your dress with each push upwards to steady your head. it's like its been rehearsed by these two, the way jay watches every move of jakes hands.

jakes hands leave your neck to roughly grope your breasts, your hands cupping his as he massages them. jays eyes seem to darken as you make eye contact, only breaking once jakes hands both move lower. jake forces your dress up over your waist, your bottom half and underwear exposed.

finally jay makes a move towards you two, lightly shoving jake to the right, pushing his lips into yours. his right hand cups your face gently, his lips feathery soft. you try to move closer to deepen the kiss but he doesn't let you budge, his left hand snaking up your neck. his right hand lowers to do the same, both his hands holding your neck in a light but unbudging grip.

you're still trapped against the counter as jake watches your body, the way jay shamelessly pushes himself up against you, groaning softly. he encourages him, his right hand coming up to push the back of his head. he forces jay to tilt his head to the right, finally deepening the kiss the way you wanted it to be.

jake strangely enough pushes his face into your right ear, kissing your outer cheek. he moves to your tragus before going to bite your helix, moving his face to the left. it's almost overwhelming, jays hands moving to grope your boobs this time.

jake seizes this movement to grab the right side of your neck to bring his lips close, kissing up and down your neck. from right behind your earlobe down, his lips leave a trail, jays hands massaging your boobs upwards. his hands move lower, searching your body the same way jake did but with more intent, his hands immediately finding the waistband of your underwear.

jays lips pull away so he can bring his right middle finger to his mouth, scooping saliva from under his tongue. he uses his left hand to move your underwears waistband forward, his middle finger immediately pushing between your lips. you honestly didn't need more lubricant than the one you were producing between your lips but it's helpful regardless, jays finger going back and forth between your labia.

he does it three, four times before finally pushing upwards on your clit, roughly rubbing the soft mound counter clockwise. you gasp at this, jakes right hand pulling your face to the right to attach his lips to yours again.

jays hand is relentless, the small circles firm and consistent. his other fingers cupping you softly. jake almost seems to kiss at the same pace, his lips chasing yours. he lightly licks into your mouth once experimentally, doing anything to feel closer to you. your right hand wraps around to grab the nape of his neck, pulling him deeper into the kiss.

your left lightly caresses jays chest and working right hand, a slight smirk on jays face, out of your eyesight. jay is honestly taken aback at how natural jake acts in the trio, completely comfortable being close to him as long as he's connected to you in some physical way.

jays hand finally leaves your clit to hunt deeper, his middle and ring finger rubbing lightly between your lips to collect some arousal. he groans at the feeling of his wet fingers, tugging at his bottom lip with his teeth.

the moment his lip lightly bounces free, he wiggles both fingers in, jake helping the positioning by hiking your left leg up and to the side. the extra space makes you feel scarily exposed, cool air fanning your inner thighs as jay curls his fingers in confidently.

you let out a soft moan in response, jake mimicking you in encouragement. he's past hard at this point, his pants uncomfortably tight against his erection. jay is too, trying to sneak glances between jakes body and yours to try and get a glimpse of your underwear.

the moment jay begins to lightly push and curl his fingers inside you, the noise is soft and wet. both boys look down, jake finally peeling his lips off yours to look down at jays hand. jake looks back and around for their oversized couch, listening to make sure no ones come home.

you and jay both follow him, jay turning to his left to eye the same couch jake does. jay pulls his fingers out before pecking your lips once, his left hand reaching for you as you three begin to walk over. you practically bounce in your drunken steps, jay rushing to clean his two fingers off in his mouth out of sight.

once you three reach the couch that faces the kitchen, jake is on you again, his arms wrapping around you as he kisses your neck. he forces you to plop down on the couch, his arms retracting the moment you start to fall backwards.

you're in the middle of the couch, a good amount of space at your head and feet for both jay and jake to be fit in comfortably. once you're settled, his hands reach for your panties, pulling them down your thighs. they twist into themselves as they come off, fully bunched up together before jake throws them to the left.

he shuffles down to bring his left hand up to hold your thigh, his thumb pushing into the flesh before tilting his head. he admires you slightly as jay takes a large swig from the gin bottle, trying to catch up to you two. jake shuffles backwards on his right knee as he finds a good place to settle, his face inching closer to your parted legs.

he finds a way to lie down, his calves uncomfortably leaning onto the armrest of the couch as his elbows hold him up. both his hands hold the skin between your lower thigh and ass, thumbs on either side of your outer labia.

his left hands thumb slightly pulls your right labia majora over a bit before laying a soft kiss on your clitoral hood. you cup your hands over your face in embarrassment, sighing as he lightly wraps his plush lips around the bud, sucking. he closes his eyes as he moves his bottom lip to change the strength, the noise echoing.

jay comes around silently to push jakes head down the same way jake had when he was kissing you, jake smiling slightly as he looks up at you. he kisses your clit again to give him time to stop smiling before sucking again using tongue.

jay wastes no time to unbuckle his belt, the noise causing you to look over to your right. "hold his head down." jay comments playfully, your hands still cupping your nose and mouth. you do though, your left hand coming down to ruffle in jake's hair.

jake groans at your hand in his hair, pushing him to suck harder. your vagina glistens from the saliva he leaves, his head moving as he practically makes out your vagina, sucking up any arousal or saliva that collects before moving back up to your clit. he's messy, his nose lightly nosing your clit each time he moves lower, breathing you in.

jay is almost shocked at the way he passionately eats you out, his right hand down the front of his pants as he glances around jakes face to eye the way your thighs twitch closed each time he sucks in the right spot. he harshly gropes himself at the imagery, your eyes focusing in on the way his wrist disappears and reappears with each downward tug.

jake lightly humps the couch as he eats you out, his eyes only opening momentarily to catch the way you breathe irregularly. you can't help but grind upwards once, jake moaning against you. hes practically leaking in his pants at this point, his light grinding against the couch.

jay catches the way his hips buck. he huffs out a simple laugh at the action before looking back up at your face. the moment he sees you staring at his groin, his right hand slips from under his pants to pull his underwear and pants down in one go.

his erection comically bobs a little once its free, your eyes widening. he's heavy, a good six point seven inches. he notices your reaction, looking down at himself hanging. you hesitate with your right hand to reach for it, but jay puts his left hand out to encourage you.

his erection is dry besides the bit of precum lightly glistening at the head. your right hand lightly holds his erection up to lightly thumb the tip, a groan leaving his lips at the action. a soft moan leaves his lips before you let go, moving to hold yourself up on your right arm instead

jake works tirelessly against your clit, humming. hes near tears at how hard he is, your left hand encouraging him as your fingers run back and forth through his hair, bangs lightly brushing your skin as you do so.

jay gets the hint, stepping closer. you open your mouth for him, looking up at jay. his face is straight and unwavering, but he's eager, his left thumb coming up to lightly cup the upper right side of your face as his free hand angles himself for your mouth.

you take the head into your mouth, your lips lightly cupping your teeth. your tongue lightly swirls up and around his tip, the taste a little salty. he huffs heavily through his nose.

you try to suck him off the best you can considering jakes movements, your head lightly pushing further down his length. with each pull back of your head you suck him off harshly. jay moans loudly each time you messily suck and swallow.

jakes lips wrap around your clit one last time before sucking just right, a choke causing you to pull of jays penis at once. you moan loudly, your left hand fisting his hair as your head falls forward, eyes squeezed tight.

jay watches with his bottom lip bitten, his right hand lightly tucking himself into his pants so he doesn't leave his erection out. jakes nose sits at the top fat of your vagina as he lightly shakes his head side to side between the folds of your lips.

your mouth hangs open at the feeling, jakes right hand pushing his middle and ring finger in. he scissors you open noisily, the position torture for his neck and upper body—your arm barely holding you up at the abuse. his fingers are relentless with each curl upwards, beckoning more arousal out with each drawback.

"f—uck, jake~!"

a loud, guttural moan leaves your lips as it hits you, your eyes pricking with tears. you ride his face shamelessly now as he lets you, the heel of your left foot steading you. his fingers catch any cum he misses with his mouth, humming against you as he chases your clit with each upward thrust of your hips.

jays mouth drops open at the imagery, his eyes glued on the way jakes lips pull away shiny when he's done. jake moves to get more comfortable, sitting on his right calf as his left foot hits the ground. he uses his left hand to collect any wetness on his face before using his lips and teeth to suck them clean, eyes focused on the way your vagina looks.

when jake finally stops moving his fingers, he curls them upward to collect as much arousal as he can. he eventually moves off the couch to your side, and through unspoken command, jay moves to kneel where he once was. jake uses his left hand to hurriedly move his pants and underwear out of the way. he skillfully unbuttons and zips his dress pants down with ease, hurriedly pulling himself out of his pants.

with your cum, jake shamelessly jerks off in front of you, eyes focused on the way the creamy consistency lighty spreads around his length. jay notices a jacket—belonging to heeseung—stuck between the back of the couch and the wall.

he immediately searches the coat pockets as your eyes switch between his search and jake jerking himself off while watching you. jakes mouth hangs open as he shamelessly jerks off for you, his left hand holding his shirt up so you can see more of his skin.

jay finds a condom in the left jacket pocket, tearing it open with his teeth and right hand. he lets the wrapper fall beside him without care as he lightly shimmies his pants and underwear down enough to pull his cock free.

jay uses both his hands to roll the new condom on when he finds the right side, not questioning if the sizing would be off. he uses both his hands to stroke the condom down his shaft, the soft sound of the lubricated condom catching your attention.

it’s a perfect fit—funny enough to him—as he shuffles forward without mentioning it to jake as much as he wants to. his pants are still on as he moves forward, just pulling them down enough so he can keep them out of the way.

jays right knee holds him up as he doesn't bother asking if you need a minute, or even want another round. you're fine with it, keeping your legs apart as you finally tear your eyes away from jake to watch as jay uses his right hand to line himself up.

you don't need prep after all jakes hard work, so jay doesn't bother, slowly pushing himself in.

your mouth gapes for the second time as your right elbow struggles to support you, each inch slowly pushing deeper. once jay settles, you feel like you can barely breathe, jakes hand on his erection working fast.

jay begins to thrust at a comfortable pace for you, slow and steady as he bites his bottom lip. "y/n." jake moans lightly, your head bobbing back to look at him through clouded vision.

a high pitched whine leaves jakes lips the moment your eyes set on him, his right hand pumping so fast and tightly it seems painful. you playfully open you mouth for him, your tongue peaking out. he takes the bait as he steps forward, angling his erection between your lips as you suck on his tip.

it feels as if jay splits you open on his dick, each thrust slapping his skin against yours with the force. he's thick, feeling intrusive but so good.

your lips pop off jakes dick to swallow as he cums, one final spurt falling on your lips and chin. jake groans at this before moving to sit by your head, tired. his left hand comes from behind you, his index finger lightly brushing the cum off your face, pushing it between your lips. you swallow willingly around his fingertip, giving a soft kiss to the tip of his finger.

when you realize how close jakes thigh is to your neck, you move to lay your head, his pants still on. jake tucks himself away before lazily using his left hand to grope your left boob through your dress and bra. jakes fingers search for your nipple as jay thrusts against you, the clapping sound loud and wet.

you didn't think it was possible for you to be so wet, but you were past what you thought was possible as jay lightly brings his right hand up through his consistent thrusts.

his thumb pushes down on your clit harshly, but it doesn't move. he just continues to thrust into you like a toy, the force causing your body to lightly jiggle at the force.

jays left hand travels your body, his left hand rubbing your inner thigh up to your stomach. he'd then trail his hand back down to your thigh, admiring your frame.

he massages the fat of your thigh, his teeth digging so heavily into his bottom lip he nearly draws blood. jakes left hand peels off the top of your dress to slide under the low neckline, pinching and pulling lightly at your hardening nipple once his hand pushes under your wired bra.

jay comes pretty quickly himself, following jakes lead. a loud groan leaving his lips as he continues to thrust into you, sheltered by the condom. he buries himself in one last time with a wiggle of his hips, a gasp leaving your lips before he pulls out slowly. jake laughs at the action, his hand sliding to your right breast.

the feeling of him slipping out leaves you feeling empty. you clench around nothing at the emptiness, jay watching small spurts of cum escape your lips. his right middle finger toys around with it a little, smearing it up and down your labia minora.

jay pulls back fully to stand, gripping the condom lightly at the base as he pulls it off slowly. his cum pools in the latex as he brings it up to tie it closed, experienced.

that's when it starts to hit you what this was,

who you were to them.

"i don't know about you guys but i could definitely eat." jake spits lightly, his hand still cupping your right boob. you feel slightly rejected regardless of them not saying anything.

you suddenly start to feel exposed as you moved to sit up, fixing your dress as your legs close. jakes hand is forced out of your dress when you sit up, your left arm coming up to hug over your torso. you try to spot your discarded underwear, both boys watching your demeanor change.

you three were all pretty much sober by this point, and you honestly didn't know if they fucked you because they wanted to or if you just seemed so easy they took what they could.

"y/n?" jake asks, a frown on his face when you look over at him almost pained. "yea?" you answered softly, trying hard to not expose how you suddenly feel. "if you wanna go home that's fine, but i'd really like if you slept over tonight." jake comments, his eyes not leaving yours.

"same." jay pitches in, coming around to stand closer to you as he fixes himself and his pants. "the food is probably cold and possibly burnt," jay starts, condom still in hand. "but i really think we should treat the rest of tonight like a proper date." jay finishes, smiling sweetly at you.

"i have plenty oversized shirts you can sleep in after we go up to shower." jake comments, his left hand reaching for your face. you look at him against your new judgement for a soft kiss, calming your nerves lightly.

"we shower?" you ask playfully with a raised brow, both men laughing lightly before jay turns to walk towards the kitchen for the garbage bin.

"of course. i'm never leaving you alone after tonight." jake confesses lightly with a smile, biting his bottom lip once before leaning in again for another peck.

© SJYFAVE ON TUMBLR

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lol imagine

I'm a Virgin, Not a Murderer: ch.1 | pop your cherry

virgin!heeseung x sex worker!reader warnings: smut (mdni), oral (m.rec), blue balls, murder, mentions of blood, sex work (use of words tart card and prostitute), set in the 90's london, heeseung is a loser, anything else lmk wc: 11.2k ch.1 synopsis: determined to lose his virginity, heeseung follows his friend's plan and ends up hiring you to pop his cherry, little does he know that he'll walk out of that room something much worse than a virgin a/n: hi! this is the first instalment of iavnam and i am so so so excited to share this with you all. this is a silly, fun fic that i hope you can enjoy but i will say that it has some moments of angst throughout. feedback, comments, reblogs, and likes are all appreciated and i hope you give loser!hee a chance

masterlist | chapter 2

“What am I going to do? I can’t enter working life a virgin.” Heeseung sighs, rubbing his temples as he complains.

Heeseung is a gentle soul, the type of boy you read about in novels or see in cheesy romance films. No, he’s not the bad boy with a hidden heart of gold or the burly football player with a secret love for the arts. Heeseung is the overlooked best friend, the quiet boy pining from the sidelines, the introverted geek who spends his Fridays alone while the girl he loves rushes off with the popular guy.

At 22, Heeseung has never been with a girl. He can’t even look at one for more than ten seconds without sweating or mumbling about the new Toy Story film that was released last year. And with only two months left before he graduates, the thought of entering the adult world as a virgin weighs heavily on him. He might be the only one from the Class of ‘96 who hasn't had this experience, and he feels an urgent need to change that.

He watches his friends with a mix of envy and longing as they get into relationships or have sex with the nearest girl at a party, wishing it could be him for once. All his life, he’s dreamt of a perfect romance where a boy meets a girl, they fall in love, and share their first time.

All in all, Heeseung just wants to be in love with the person he loses himself to. But time is ticking, and he’s starting to realise that his dream of a whirlwind romance might not be feasible. He might have to settle for whatever chance he can get.

“What’s the use in complaining if you aren’t going to talk to a girl for more than a minute?” Jongseong mutters into his beer can, eyes still trained on the Sony Trinitron TV in front of him.

Jongseong has had this conversation with Heeseung so many times that it’s starting to bore him. He understands his best friend’s desire for a meaningful connection; anyone would want that. But Heeseung’s idealism clashes with Jongseong’s pragmatic nature. For months - no, years - he’s been telling Heeseung to either take action or let it go. There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin at any age, and Heeseung used to see it that way too. Yet, for some reason, he’s convinced he’d be the laughingstock of any office if word got around.

All throughout high school, Heeseung was the same: stuttering and twitching whenever a girl looked at him. Jongseong has never seen anyone worship women as Heeseung does while simultaneously being utterly terrified of them.

Heeseung suddenly grabs the can from Jongseong’s hand, stunning him, and slams it onto the coffee table of their apartment. “I’m serious, Jongseong. I’m doing it this time, for real.” There’s determination and fire in his voice, even though his heart is pounding at the thought.

Turning to face him, still in a can-holding position, Jongseong raises an eyebrow. “You’re really going to do it? No wimping out?” he asks incredulously. It’s not that he doesn’t believe his friend’s words; he’s just surprised by how assured Heeseung looks.

Nodding, Heeseung crosses his legs on the couch. “Absolutely! And I have a plan.”

“Oh god, what is it?” Jongseong asks nervously, apprehensive about what kind of plan the virgin has concocted for himself.

Heeseung takes a deep breath, trying to steady his racing heart. “Alright, so here’s the deal. I’m going to start small and take baby steps. First, I’ll join a club or a group where I can meet people without the pressure of one-on-one interactions. Maybe a book club or a film society. That way, I can get more comfortable talking to girls in a casual setting.”

Jongseong nods slowly, considering the idea. “Okay, that sounds reasonable. Except all the clubs and meets have stopped now considering it’s two months until summer vacation.” The younger rolls his eyes, picking his can back up. “What other plans do you have?”

There is a silence in the air which pauses Jongseong mid-sip. Scratching the back of his neck, Heeseung sheepishly shrugs and winces at his friend's disappointing gaze. It took him a week to come up with that one plan, hoping that he could ride on the waves of already-formed groups. He did, however, come up with the plan 4 months ago and just has never put it into action, so it is a little outdated.

“It was a solid plan!” he huffs and crosses his arms, pouting like a baby despite being the oldest of the two. “It’s not like I can just phone up a girl on one of those fancy mobiles and ask her to fuck me.”

Jongseong’s ears perk up, eyes widening as if he’s just hit the motherload of all ideas. His excitement makes Heeseung sit up in attention, furrowing his brows as he watches him stand up and turn the TV off. “You’re a fucking genius, Lee.”

Although the compliment settles fondly in his heart, he still doesn’t know why he is a genius nor does he have time to think about it before his best friend drags him by the arm outside of the flat and into the street, striding towards something with tenacity. 

He complains about the grip Jongseong has on him but follows him regardless, feet rushing to keep up the pace as they make their way down the street and into the skirts of the city. Heeseung knows better than to argue with the boy when he is on a mission like this, the last time he did so was when Jongseong went on the hunt for the last Thor comic book, edition #487 and Heeseung told him to just ‘get it another time’. Turns out, everyone and their granny wanted it and with Heeseung constantly holding them up, he missed out on the first press. The boy never heard the end of it and was almost disowned.

So he trails idly behind him until they reach a phone booth. The glass is taped with flyers of missing dogs and Y2K conspiracies, babysitter ads and jobs for hire. It’s a mess, yet Jongseong seems to be looking for something in particular.

“I know I said phoning up a girl, but I hardly think Mystic Michelle sees me in her future,” Heeseung snorts, dipping his hands into his pockets. He refuses to tell Jongseong that in a desperate attempt to find out when he would lose his virginity, he had already phoned a psychic medium who told him, “You’ll lose it when you choose to travel.” Considering he has never and likely will never step foot outside his hometown, he deemed that as his first and last time trusting in the universe’s whispers.

Jongseong, ignoring Heeseung’s quips, searches diligently until he sees the poster hanging inside the booth and immediately whips the door open, dragging the surprised black-haired boy into the tight space with him. With urgency, he tears the number tab off of the bright red poster and thrusts it into Heeseung’s hand.

Pointing to the poster, Jongseong smirks. “She is your ticket out of virginville,” he says playfully yet a serious undercurrent waves through his voice. If Heeseung is going to get laid, and fast, he is going to need a professional.

Heeseung looks closely at the poster and sees a girl in a white-laced thong posing in front of a red background, her left arm covering her plump tits as she sucks on a lollipop. His eyes shake and his head follows, backing up slightly despite the confined space and protesting the idea profusely. “Not a chance, Jongseong! This is prostitution, which by the way, is illegal in this country.”

“I know you’re a saint, okay? But desperate times call for desperate measures.” He shrugs, already putting the 20p coins into the slot and picking up the ringer. “You know Jaeyun lost his virginity this way.”

“Yeah, and she was a 43-year-old mother of 6 who fucked him in her garden shed. He said he got the clap from that!” 

Heeseung is not exaggerating, Jaeyun was so determined to ‘gain experience’ that he chose one of these girls from a traffic light pole and what was promised to be a sexy 21-year-old in his area, turned out to be a mum who needed a quick cash grab before her kids got home from school. Needless to say, he went along with it, already mentally prepared for the pop and then a few weeks later by consequence he was in the sexual health clinic getting tested for an STD. He lost his virginity but also his dignity that day.

Exhaling loudly, Jongseong closes his eyes in frustration. “We can phone and ask for an appointment and if she isn’t this very pretty girl that is offering you a ‘spanking good time with a 22-year-old’ then you can bolt for the hills and we’ll find you someone else.” His tone is coated in disapproval at his friend’s unwillingness to give this brilliant idea of his a chance.

Punching in the numbers, Jongseong holds the receiver between his ear and his shoulder, “You want me to talk?”

Realising he is stuck in a boat without a paddle, Heeseung relents, gesturing for Jongseong to take the reigns of the situation; if he were to be the one to speak to the girl, he would probably vomit. This is the complete opposite of how he had dreamed this would go and Jongseong knows it.

The phone begins to ring and Jongseong shushes the other boy as he waits patiently. It gives Heeseung the chance to look at the lewd poster once again and he can see why this one caught Jongseong’s attention over the other tart cards in the booth. The girl is striking and real, not like some of the page 3 models that have clearly been used to lure these desperate men in, there is a prettiness to her, a charm that pulls attention even through a piece of paper.

“Hello, handsome, how can I be of service?”

Her voice, sweet yet sultry, filters through the phone and dances on the glass panels, sending a shiver down Heeseung's spine and making his knees weak. His eyes widen as he gazes at the poster, imagining that captivating voice belonging to the stunning girl. Surely, it couldn't be her, could it? No one could sound and look so perfect simultaneously.

Jongseong scoffs at Heeseung's reaction to a mere female voice and playfully slaps the back of his head, snapping him out of his reverie within the stuffy confines of the phone booth. He clears his throat and addresses the caller on the other end. “Hi, uh,” he glances at the poster, searching for the name, “Y/N, is it?”

You giggle softly over the phone, twirling the cord attached to your landline. “Yes, what can I help you with?”

It’s been a few days since you put up the flyers and there has already been an abundance of calls coming your way; some old guys looking to rub one out before work, others looking to be degraded, and some even just wanting advice on how best to clean their house before their wives come home.

For you, it’s easy money and a needed break from the work you do other than please pervy men. On days you’re not at home, you’re out working behind the bar at Nice N’ Sleazys, picking up after everyone’s mess and pouring pint after pint while the worst music grates at your ears. 

Sex work, despite its numerous downsides, offers a straightforward way to earn money. Initially, you worked in a brothel just outside the main city, where your tips and pride were stolen by the cruel man who ran it. The girls were lovely, and some of your regulars were kind, but the work and pain were too much for the meagre earnings.

So you left and started managing yourself. The owner didn’t like it, but it was your decision. He wasn’t sad to lose you, but rather the money your regulars brought in. However, his displeasure was short-lived when he found your replacement—someone who brought in more money and was willing to do much more than you ever could.

Despite the challenges and dangers managing yourself has provided you with a sense of independence and control that you did not have when working for someone else. You've learned how to deal with the industry's complexities, setting boundaries and putting your own safety first; even if that meant refusing some of your regulars into your new endeavours. 

The line goes silent and you speak up again, “Can I help you?” you ask gently, still keeping the sex worker persona intact. However, once you hear shuffling in the background with hushed whispers, you quickly drop the act and sigh. “Look, if it’s you boys from the school up the road prank calling me again, I will call your mothers.”

With posting your landline in phone booths comes prank calls, you expect it but you could really use the money this week; your fridge is running on empty and your washing machine has somehow blown up on itself - that’s what you get for buying second-hand from a newspaper ad. Maybe you should have picked up that cleaner job for that mansion in the middle of nowhere while you were buying appliances. 

Customers might be regular but you’re just starting, you can’t charge more than you’re worth.

Jongseong flicks Heeseung’s nose, making him yelp. While you are on the other line, Heeseung decides to try and hang up and chicken out but his friend is adamant that he is seeing this through. He doesn’t know how long he can sit and listen to him whining anymore.

“Sorry! No, uh, shit,” Jongseong racks his brain for words that have escaped him, biting his lip as he concentrates on how to perfectly imitate the virgin, “My name is Lee Heeseung. I am a pathetic 22-year-old and need to lose my virginity. I was wondering if you could do me the honours of popping my cherry.”

“I do not talk like that!” Heeseung protests, swatting Jongseongs arm who simply shrugs, unbothered by the offence he is causing the elder. His sole mission is to get Heeseung laid and he is so close to making that happen.

They hear you hum on the other line and immediately stop bickering, staring at the phone as if they can see you through it. “Can I speak to the real Heeseung please?” 

The boy feels sick, head dizzy at the sound of his name coming from your lips but also because Jongseong is thrusting the phone into his face, moving behind him to give him the floor. He hadn’t anticipated speaking to you, just casually observing and listening in to Jongseong sell him off to you. 

“Put on your big boy pants and do this!” Jongseong scolds, eyes darting between Heeseung’s face and the receiver.

Carefully, Heeseung brings it to his ear and closes his eyes, counting to ten in his head before replying. “Hi, Y/N.”

“Hi, Heeseung. How are you doing?” you ask softly. This isn’t your first rodeo with a virgin so you know better than to go in all tits blazing and calling him a big boy. 

Nodding as though you can see him, Heeseung purses his lips, trying to muster up some semblance of confidence. “I’m good…how are you?” he asks, his voice wavering slightly despite his efforts to sound assured. The shaky breath he lets out betrays his nerves, and he inwardly cringes, expecting the worst.

On the other end, you can't help but giggle softly. It’s not a titter of mocking, but rather one of endearment. Virgins are the cutest to speak to in your eyes because most of them have no idea how to navigate a conversation like this. There's something charming about their genuine nervousness and innocent curiosity.

Heeseung’s embarrassment deepens as he hears your giggle, imagining all the ways he might be coming off as awkward and inexperienced. He rubs the back of his neck, feeling the heat rise to his cheeks. “I-I’m sorry if I sound nervous,” he stammers, “I’ve never done anything like this before.”

Your voice remains warm and reassuring, easing some of his anxiety. “That’s okay, Heeseung. Everyone has to start somewhere. I promise, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” Your voice is so smooth and lovely that Heeseung instantly relaxes. He is glad that if Jongseong picked any of the workers on the posters beside him, he is glad it was you.

Straightening his posture, Heeseung steadies himself. “My friend is right, I am a virgin and I want to get rid of it. Can you help with that?”

“You know, there’s nothing wrong with being a virgin,” you gently remind Heeseung, concern lacing your voice. “Are you sure this is how you want to do it?” You should be arranging a time and place rather than potentially jeopardising your weekly food shop, but if you were in his shoes, you’d want to offer him an escape route, just in case.

But Heeseung seems resolute now, determined to rid himself of the insecurity that has plagued him for so long. “I am. I don’t want to graduate with this hanging over my head.”

Your heart melts a little at his sincerity, and you can’t help but pout. “Okay. Well, one of my regulars...well, let’s just say I’m not seeing him anymore, so I have a free slot tomorrow at 2pm. I usually go to the Point A Hotel near the intersection. Can you make it?”

Heeseung looks to Jongseong with panicked eyes, silently pleading for reassurance. The younger man nods enthusiastically, giving him two thumbs up, mouthing a gentle “Go for it” for extra ease. 

“Yeah, 2pm is fine.” His heart beats rapidly as he accepts your offer, his mouth going dry and his palms sweaty. 

“Amazing. Bring £200-, no, £300 and condoms in your size,” you instruct, changing your regular rate last minute. If he is as inexperienced as he seems, he won't know you’re ripping him off a little. It’s not like you want to but it’s what you have to do. The regular that was in that slot usually paid £500 with tips. However, you will take the comfort of not having him around anymore over bills.

Jongseong’s jaw hits the floor as he hears the price, his gaze glued to the phone but before he can barter for a better deal, the phone goes dead, the five 20ps he slotted in finally running out and leaving them both in silence.

Heeseung’s arm drops to his side, still gripping the receiver as he stares blankly into space. “£300 is all my savings,” he whispers to himself, the weight of the realisation settling heavily on his shoulders. Yet, even as the words leave his mouth, he’s working out how to move his bills around and where the nearest pharmacy is for condoms. 

Stepping out of the booth, Jongseong holds the door open and ushers Heeseung to follow. Heeseung, still lost in thought, obediently steps out, the crisp evening air hitting his face, a welcoming cool to the flush of his skin due to talking to a sex worker for the first time and also the heat of the booth.

Jongseong wraps an arm around his friend’s shoulder, pulling him in with a gleeful tug. “Now, let's go get you some rubbers. I’m thinking extra small?”

“Shut the fuck up, Jongseong.”

_____

Standing in front of the shabby hotel, Heeseung braces himself for what will come. He should be ecstatic that he is finally on his way to losing his v card, but the dark clouds in the sky, the three buses, and the 30-minute walk to get to the Point A hotel have given him a dreaded sense of doubt.

The once vibrant red bricks of the building are now faded and chipped, with grime clinging to the crevices. The flickering neon sign above the entrance buzzes intermittently, casting a sickly green hue that does little to dispel the gloom. The place reeks of neglect, and a faint smell of dampness hangs in the air, mingling with the odour of stale cigarettes.

Heeseung’s stomach churns as he takes in the dilapidated surroundings. His heart pounds in his chest, and his palms are slick with sweat. Everything about this goes against what he stands for, but he thinks this might be the closest he will get in his young adult life. The last thing he wants is to be a 40-year-old virgin still complaining to Jongseong that numbing his hand and rubbing one out isn’t doing it for him the way it should.

He looks up at the darkened windows, some of them boarded up, others covered in grime. A lone figure stumbles out of the entrance, clutching a bottle of Jack Daniels, and disappears into the grey afternoon, reinforcing Heeseung's trepidation. Of course, the sex worker wasn’t going to ask him to meet in a swanky five-star hotel, but anything had to be better than this.

Taking a deep breath, he tries to steady his nerves. The anticipation that should be filling him with excitement instead gnaws at him with apprehension. His mind races with conflicting thoughts – the desire to finally cross this threshold clashing with the nagging sense that he's settling for something far less than he deserves. The thought of his future self, bitter and frustrated, pushes him forward despite the unease curling in his gut.

He can't let fear dictate his choices any longer; at the end of the day, virginity is a social construct, and women are the greatest gift from God, so there is nothing to be so scared about. Taking another deep breath, he steels himself and steps forward, ready to face whatever lies ahead within the confines of the Point A hotel.

Quickly, he grabs the shutting door and steps inside, his guard raising instantly as he sees the darkness of the foyer. This is the type of place where people mug you for fun rather than necessity. Stained mattresses are leaning against the graffitied walls, the overhead lights are dull, providing little support to Heeseung’s pupils, and the carpet beneath him is sticky, every fibre clinging to the sole of his Air Max trainers.

He takes tentative steps to the front desk, which has been barricaded by crossed steel bars and adorned with a sign reading ‘Police on Speed Dial’. This does little to make him feel any safer. Heeseung’s eyes squint as he gets closer to the desk lamp and sees a middle-aged woman reading the latest issue of the Digger, a local newspaper filled with all the latest and greatest gossip of the town. The last time he read that particular paper was in the doctor's office, and the headline was ‘HE’S ESCAPED’ with a picture of the man who murdered the shopkeeper and police officer up in Brixton.

Shivering, not due to the air conditioning above him, Heeseung knocks on the desk softly and clears his throat, gaining the attention of the relaxed redhead.

“Yeah?” she asks nonchalantly, her eyes flickering up to the scared boy as if he was inconveniencing her by making her do her job. “Single, double, or meeting someone?”

The question throws Heeseung for a loop. He doesn’t know what room you're in or even if you would have given your real name. Surely, you would have created a fake persona when you came here. What if Y/N was the fake name? His pulse quickens as he stammers, trying to find the right words.

"Um, I'm meeting someone," he finally manages to say, his voice barely above a whisper. The woman sighs, clearly unimpressed, and picks up an old, dog-eared ledger from under the desk.

"Name?" she asks, flipping through the pages with a disinterested expression.

Hesitating, Heeseung picks at the skin on his fingers and clears his throat again, a blush rising to his cheeks as he remembers that this is your regular spot, meaning that as soon as he utters your name - if that is the one you gave - then she will know exactly what he is here for. “Y/N. I’m looking for Y/N.”

The receptionist's eyes suddenly trail up and down his body, making him feel as though he is already naked. He is right in his suspicions; she is definitely judging him. Once she finishes examining him, she scowls in disgust and leans back into her chair, placing her feet on the desk as she grabs her paper once more. “Room 1015. And tell her she needs to calm it down with the lube she uses; it’s a bitch to get out of the sheets.”

Heeseung's face burns with embarrassment as he mumbles a quick “thank you” and turns away from the desk. He heads towards the lift, the receptionist’s gaze still sitting in the forefront of his mind, making him even more self-conscious than before. The lift pings open to reveal a tattered metal box, illuminated by a dirty yellow light that only makes the streaks of brown and rust stand out more. Maybe Heeseung should get a tetanus shot after all of this.

He presses the first-floor button with his elbow, careful not to touch anything with his bare skin just in case, and ascends to your room. The buzz from the light and the creak of the old wires holding the elevator make the journey last forever, considering it’s only one floor. But maybe that is also just his nerves. Heeseung's mind races as he stands there, the walls of the lift feeling like they're closing in on him. The air is stale, filled with a faint metallic tang that makes him uneasy.

As the lift jerks to a halt and the doors open, Heeseung steps out into a dimly lit corridor. The wallpaper is peeling, revealing patches of mould beneath. The faint buzz of a flickering light down the hall adds to the eerie atmosphere. Heeseung takes a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart, and walks towards room 1015. Each step feels heavier than the last, the worn carpet muffling his footsteps but not the pounding of his heart in his ears.

Pausing before your door, he abruptly pats down his jacket to ensure that he has brought the money and the condoms as per your request. His fingers brush against the crisp bills and the small, foil packets, reassuring him that he hasn’t forgotten anything crucial. The sense of preparedness does little to quell his anxiety, but it’s a small comfort amid his turmoil.

Heeseung breathes out slowly, cracking his neck as though he is bracing himself to fight with Roy Jones Jr. and not a 22-year-old girl who exchanges sex for money; although, he knows which one is scarier at this moment. His knuckles bang on the door lightly and suddenly his mind is reeling a mile a minute, all the questions and doubts he has been tackling within his mind for the past few hours now rushing to him at once. What if you aren’t who you say you are? You could be an old geezer looking to have his way with Heeseung and then toss him out the window with not so much as a thank you. What if this whole thing goes horribly wrong and cums as soon as you touch his cock? He spent last night jerking off and training himself to last just a little longer than usual in an aid to impress you.

Suddenly, there is a lump in his throat and trepidation overcasting the glee of losing his virginity. Something feels wrong, out of place, and his mum always told him to run at the first feeling of danger.

Yet, he doesn’t have another second to turn back and flee the scene because the door is swinging open and revealing-

You. Gorgeous, beautiful - definitely not a creepy old man - you. Heeseung’s jaw almost hits the floor like a cartoon character and his eyes turn to hearts as he takes you in. The baby pink robe you’re wearing with white lace detailing, your hair cascading down one of your shoulders in a soft, bouncy curl, and your lips that are tinted red like glossy maraschino cherries. You look even better than the poster in the phone booth if that was even possible.

His body flushes with heat as he sees your erect nipples poking through the silk, and he feels like he could faint. The sight of you is overwhelming, making his head spin and his heart race even faster. The trepidation that had gripped him moments before is momentarily forgotten, replaced by a rush of desire and nervous anticipation.

You smile warmly at him, a smile that reaches your eyes and seems to melt away some of his fear. "Hi, Heeseung," you say softly, your voice as smooth and inviting as honey. "Come on in."

Heeseung nods, stepping over the threshold and into the room. His movements are awkward and stiff, a stark contrast to your graceful fluidity. The door clicks shut behind him, and the reality of the situation hits him once more. But this time, the sense of wrongness is overshadowed by the sheer presence of you.

You move behind him and drink in the sight of him. If every client looked this good, you might just never complain again - but unfortunately, men like Heeseung come few and far between, like little sprinkles of water amongst oil. He is wearing slightly baggy deep-blue jeans, a white-faded-into-grey Rolling Stones t-shirt, and a red crinkled plaid shirt which is covered by a brown faux-leather jacket. Even his hair is washed and parted down the middle prettily, reaching his rosy cheeks and curving in slightly.

There isn’t a man that has ever looked this fine in your presence, so you’re starting to wonder why on earth he is still a virgin. Then again, he was super nervous on the phone, even making his friend speak for him to begin with - and with the lack of eye contact he is giving you, he clearly doesn’t do well in the presence of a female.

“I didn’t think you would come,” you observe, giggling as he tenses beside you.

Heeseung nods, agreeing with you almost immediately because for a good 2 hours while deciding on whether to wear his favourite boxers or a pair he got from his gran for Christmas, he almost decided to curl himself back into bed and forget you even existed.

The weight of his decision, the culmination of his fears and desires, all come crashing down at once as the silence settles. But standing there, with you smiling at him, he feels a small spark of hope, a glimmer of excitement that maybe, just maybe, this won’t be as terrifying as he’s imagined.

“You look unreal,” he whispers his inner thoughts out loud, causing him to slap his hand over his mouth, eyes shaking at the thought of saying anything at all to you.

His nervousness makes your heart cry, the cuteness trembling from his body is overwhelming, and you find yourself relaxing slightly. Heeseung is a gentle giant, and although he towers over you, he poses no threat at all which you gladly welcome considering what you normally have to deal with in this industry. It’s nice to not have to wonder what on earth a man is planning to do with you because you can’t read him.

Slinking your way towards him, you tuck a section of his soft hair behind his ear, his eyes closing and Adam's apple bobbing at your touch. “I’m as real as they come, baby. Why don’t you relax and give me your coat, hmm?”

As you reach for the brown jacket and try to push it off his shoulders, he flinches and backs away, hugging himself tightly. The sudden movement surprises you, and you quickly pull back, giving him space. His eyes are wide, like a deer caught in headlights, and you can see the internal struggle playing out in his mind. His face is flushed, and there's a mixture of fear and embarrassment etched into his features.

He quickly shakes his head, realising he startled you into a confused pout. “S-sorry! It’s just the money and condoms are in here and I…I think I might still be a little on edge considering this place is…well, it’s creepy as shit.”

Laughing loudly, you do a mix of nodding and shaking your head, puzzled by his reaction but understanding his apprehension of letting just anyone touch his belongings; God knows you’ve been held at knifepoint once or twice around this area. Your laughter, genuine and bright, seems to relax him a bit. 

“That’s okay, Heeseung,” you say, throwing your hands up in a non-threatening gesture in an attempt to ease his tension, which works surprisingly well. You can see his grip on his arms loosen just a bit. “How about you hang it up behind the door?”

Heeseung looks over his shoulder and sees the empty hook, calling out for his slightly battered jacket. Whipping it off, he clenches it in his hands as though he is wringing it of water - probably his sweat - and perks up again, the nerves still evident in his voice. “Do I give you the money now or?”

You smile at his earnestness, understanding his need to follow the process correctly. His vulnerability is endearing, and you feel a protective instinct kicking in. “Normally, I would take the money upfront but since I trust you not to run away, we can sort it out before you go.” It’s a generous offer in Heeseung’s mind, but in yours, you just don’t know whether he is going to make it past touching one of your tits, so it’s better to actually charge him for what you do rather than jumping the gun.

Heeseung’s eyes widen slightly at your trust, and you can see the relief washing over him. He nods vigorously, his movements still somewhat jerky but more controlled now. “Thank you,” he mumbles, his voice soft but sincere. “I appreciate it.”

As he hangs his jacket on the hook, you can see his hands trembling slightly. He takes a deep breath, his chest rising and falling as he tries to steady himself. When he turns back to you, there’s a flicker of determination in his eyes, mingled with the lingering nervousness.

Turning around, you are suddenly standing there, your body almost pressed against his. “Come on, sit down for a minute,” you say seductively, code-switching into your sex worker persona with ease. It doesn’t take much, just lowering your voice slightly and hooding your eyes over seems to work for most men, and by Heeseung’s expression and nervous shuffle of his feet, it clearly works for him too.

You reach for his hand, and he instantly flinches, but soon gives way for you to wrap your hands around three of his fingers, slowly guiding him to sit on the edge of the bed. His breath hitches as your touch sends shivers down his spine, the warmth of your skin against his sending a jolt of electricity through him.

Heeseung’s heart pounds in his chest as he sits down, the bed sinking slightly under his weight. He can feel the heat of your body radiating against his, your closeness both comforting and intimidating. His mind races with a whirlwind of emotions—fear, desire, anticipation—all swirling together in a dizzying haze.

You sit beside him, your thigh pressing against his, and he can feel the warmth of your skin seeping through the fabric of his trousers. The sensation sends a shiver down his spine, and he can feel his cheeks flushing with heat. He swallows hard, trying to calm the rapid fluttering of his heart. He shifts uncomfortably, his nerves getting the better of him. But your presence is calming, your touch gentle and reassuring.

“Baby, we don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” you assure him, bringing your hand to play with the hairs on the nape of his neck. 

The action causes his body to instantly fold inside itself, melting as you ease him gently into a state of comfort. He hasn’t been touched by a girl in the way you are right now, the closest he’s gotten is a handhold in primary 5 because his friends forced a girl to date him during lunch, so the way your long nails tickle his heated skin only gives his cock a reason to twitch. 

Shaking his head, tensing slightly when he looks into your kind eyes. “No, no, I want to. I’m just not used to talking to girls, or looking at them, or being in the same room as them…” He begins to waffle, talking about everything he has never done with a girl and you find his honesty endearing.

“You haven’t kissed a girl either, have you?” you ask with a hint of amusement. 

“Twice? I think. But they weren’t with tongues,” the shy boy cowards with his confession, scared of being scrutinised by the one person who is supposed to be helping him with all of this. He might just die if you start to point and laugh at him. But to his surprise, you nod understandingly. 

In your world of sex and adultery, it isn’t usually a question. Everyone, especially at twenty-two has probably at least been kissed, but you don’t judge him for not being experienced in even that field. There is a vulnerability and sadness in Heeseung’s eyes that tell you everything you need to know about him; he’s quiet, timid, lacks confidence, and obviously doesn’t venture outside his friend group

You smile reassuringly, your hand still clasping his as you nod in consideration. “It’s okay, Heeseung,” you say softly, your voice filled with warmth and understanding. “We’ll take things slow, at your pace. And I promise, there’s no judgment here…I do have to make sure you’re of age though, y’know, caution and all that.”

It’s not that you think he is lying, you just need to be careful with clients like this, particularly virgins because sometimes it can be a boy chancing his arm at a shot to lose his virginity, and you are not catching a case for a few hundred quid. 

Nodding, Heeseung understands what you mean and points to his jacket. “My provisional license is in my chest pocket. The one on the right,” he instructs. He would go get it himself but his legs are boneless with your proximity, so to save him embarrassment, he’ll let you venture for it.

You release his hand with a tender squeeze before walking to the door and reaching for his jacket, your fingers deftly searching through the pocket until you find his provisional license. With a quick glance to confirm his age, you let out a breath of relief. Everything checks out.

He is also super handsome despite the stoic face and reputation that licenses have for making people look ugly, which you think is unfair but don’t comment. Your driver's license looks like you’ve been swallowed by Jabba the Hutt and regurgitated back up, so the envy you are feeling is real right now.

Suppressing the green monster at Heeseung’s flawless appearance, you slip his license back into his pocket and make your way back to him, your movements slow and deliberate. As you draw nearer, you can see the anticipation in his eyes, his gaze fixed on you with a mixture of nerves and lust.

Teasingly, you undo the tie of your thin robe, letting it open slightly and revealing a tantalising glimpse of what Heeseung is paying for. The fabric falls away, exposing the curve of your left breast, perfectly formed and enticing.

Heeseung’s eyes widen at the sight, his breath catching in his throat as he takes in the sight before him. His cheeks flush crimson, and you can see the desire burning in his eyes as he drinks in every inch of your exposed skin. 

This is his first time seeing a boob in the flesh and by God does porn not do it justice. Yours are just what he wants, the perfect size, look, and probably feel; he really needs to thank Jongseong for choosing you for this because he thinks he has hit the jackpot. 

Licking his lips, his eyes trace down to your panties and it instantly makes him squirm in place. They match your robe, a soft baby pink but the main body of them is seethrough, decorated by small pink hearts and a delicate bow on the side. The band of them are a pale rose, popping the colour of your skin beneath them. 

Seeing his reaction boosts your ego and you turn around, letting the silk drop at your feet as you glance back at him playfully, wiggling your bum to show how the panties are actually a thong that sits perfectly between your plump cheeks.

Heeseung doesn’t know where to look, your naked back, your peachy ass, or your beautiful featured face. So he decides what any virgin in his situation would do and looks away, staring at the popcorn ceiling that has leak stains on it.

Giggling, you walk over to him and straddle his lap, flicking your hair to the back to leave your breasts bare and in perfect sight for him to ogle at. Yet, he still doesn’t move. With a playful huff, you cup his face, your false nails scratching behind his ear as you pull him back to look at you.

“You’re going to have to look at me, baby,” you tease, angling his head and your body so his eyes have nowhere to look but your tits. 

They’re even better up close and if Heeseung were any other man, he would be taking your perky nipple into his mouth and starting this session with ease. But he is not any other man, he is a virgin who drools at the sight of any Playboy or Zoo magazines in the windows of shops and then immediately feels guilty because he hates objectifying women in any way shape or form.

He even feels guilty for his cock twitching in his pants every time you call him baby, knowing you’re feeling how it’s practically jumping to be released from its confines and in your grasp.

Sensing his apprehension to make a move, you decide to take the lead slowly by kissing his forehead, your tits hitting his chest as you push further onto him with the movement. “We’ll start by kissing and see where it goes, yeah?”

Your voice is forgiving and reassuring, the pads of your thumbs stroking his cheeks with fondness that only makes him mewl out slightly. You stifle the laugh because you know how humiliated he will feel if you do, not understanding that the cause of your amusement isn’t due to his whining but rather how much you’re enjoying how lost in your touch he is.

Gently, you take his hands and place them on your waist, giving him as much guidance as you can without it becoming demanding. He tenses as he feels your velvety skin, your perfume enveloping him in a mask of florals and vanilla.

"Relax, Heeseung," you say calmly, your voice soothing and encouraging. "We will go as far as you want, and we can stop at any time. Just say the word, okay?

Heeseung nods, meeting your gaze with a mix of anxiety and trust. "Okay," he replies, just above a whisper.

Moving his hands up your back, Heeseung slowly eases into feeling you, gaining confidence with each tender stroke. His touch is gentle, almost reverent, and it sends a shiver of pleasure down your spine. It's a welcome change from the roughness you're used to with your last client in this slot, and you find yourself sinking into the sensation, enjoying the intimacy of a man's touch for the first time in a long time.

It makes you wonder if this is what having a boyfriend would be like.

Heeseung’s eyes haven’t left your breasts, committing every bump of your areola and stretch mark that creates a beautiful symphony of elegant but sexy, each nipple unique in its appearance and direction. There’s nothing better than your boobs at this moment in time; he would pay you the £300 right now if just for one squeeze.

Then it hits him - he could hold them if he wanted to, that’s what he is here to do after all.

Ghosting his fingers up your back, he creates a path for them to cascade from your shoulders to the top of your breast. You feel a surge of anticipation as he gets closer, his touch sending sparks of pleasure through your body, your cunt starting to drip at the gentle caress.

He stops for a while, contemplating his next move. His eyes look up to yours pleadingly, the virginity shining through his iris’. “Can I?” he asks, seeking permission before delving in.

The act of consent fills you with warmth, and without hesitation, you nod, a reassuring smile playing on your lips. “Anything you want to do, baby,” you assure him, your voice filled with encouragement. 

Heeding your words, Heeseung finally makes his move, his digits whispering to your skin, giving them a tentative rub as he watches the skin melt around him. His thumb strokes over your left nipple, playing with it as if it were a fragile piece of art that he was too scared to break.

For some reason, the act is making you emotional, the way he is so delicately touching you. Never in your career have you seen something so pure and heartwarming. Every other virgin that has called you is just trying to stick it in your hole, never caring about your feelings or comfort.

Lifting his face up, you stare into his eyes with an underlying sparkle of adoration. If you could keep him as a client forever, you would, but you fear that this will be the last and only time with him, so you need to make it count.

You lean in, lips hovering over his petal-like ones and wait there for a moment, a silent ask for consent. It’s only fair considering his decency towards you.

With a nod and a stuttering motion, he presses his lips to yours oh-so-sheepishly. The touch is feather-light, almost tentative, and you can feel his nervousness in the way his lips tremble against yours. Yet there's a sweetness to it, a genuine curiosity and yearning that tugs at your heartstrings.

You respond gently, your lips moving softly against his, guiding him with tender patience. The kiss is slow, unhurried, and as you deepen it slightly, you feel him relax, his hands finding their way to your waist, gripping you a little tighter. His lips part instinctively, and you take the opportunity to slide your tongue against his, eliciting a soft gasp from him.

Heeseung’s reaction is immediate, his body responding to the new sensation with a mixture of surprise and pleasure. You can feel the tension melting away from him, replaced by growing confidence as he starts to explore the kiss with a bit more boldness. His hands roam cautiously, tracing the curve of your hips and the small of your back, his touch still delicate but increasingly assured.

Breaking the kiss, you rest your forehead against his, both of you breathing heavily. The intimacy of the moment hangs in the air, thick and heady, and you can see the mix of emotions playing out on his face - desire, excitement, and a lingering trace of apprehension.

“You’re doing so well, Heeseung,” you murmur softly, your fingers gently stroking the nape of his neck. “Just let yourself feel, and don’t worry about anything else.”

Heeseung’s eyes glisten with a mixture of gratitude and relief, and he nods, swallowing hard. “Okay,” he whispers, his voice steadier now. “Thank you.”

“You’re thanking me for kissing you?” you giggle, pecking his lips quickly. “How about I give you something to thank me for, to make sure you’re ready, hmm?”

Heeseung’s eyes widen, knowing exactly the act you’re alluding to, and he nods like an excited boy, a grin plastering on his face that exhibits disbelief and glee.

You guide him to lie back on the bed, the soft creak of the mattress punctuating the moment. Heeseung’s body is tense with anticipation, his hands clutching at the sheets as he watches you with a mixture of awe and nervous excitement. You feel a wave of tenderness for him, this young man who is putting his trust in you, hoping you can make this experience as good as he's imagined.

“Just relax,” you purr, your hands trailing down his chest, fingers brushing over his taut muscles that are hiding under his t-shirt. You can feel the rapid beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. “I’m going to take care of you.”

Slowly, you work your way down his body, your lips planting soft kisses along his chest and lift up the hem of his shirt to pepper some on his stomach. Each touch elicits a small gasp from him, his body reacting to the new sensations with a mix of surprise and pleasure. You can feel his muscles relaxing under your touch, his trust in you growing with each gentle caress. You feel a strange mix of responsibility and pride, wanting to show him just how good it can feel to be touched and cared for.

Reaching the waistband of his jeans, you look up at him, your eyes meeting his. “Is this okay?” you ask, giving him one last chance to change his mind.

“Yes,” he breathes out, his voice barely a whisper. “Please.”

With his consent, you unbutton his trousers and slowly slide them down, his boxers following suit. Heeseung’s erection springs free, his breath hitching as the cool air hits his heated skin. You take a moment to admire him, your fingers tracing delicate patterns along his length, feeling the tension and anticipation coiled within him. There's a sense of reverence in this moment, understanding the weight of trust he has placed in you.

“Just relax,” you repeat, your voice soothing as you wrap your hand around his shaft, giving it a gentle squeeze. He’s at least 6 inches and girthy, making your pussy clench at the thought of him being inside of you. “It’s a shame you’re not letting girls hit it, your cock is fucking spectacular.”

Heeseung’s face flushes with pride and embarrassment as you lower your head, your breath ghosting over his tip. “Oh, this is really happening…okay….fuck…” he breathes out, face turning red and eyes closing as he braces himself for the first contact. No one’s mouth has come this close to his cock so the feeling is overwhelming to his virgin mind.

You watch as his eyes flutter shut, his lips parting in a silent gasp and slowly take him into your mouth, your tongue swirling around his head, tasting the salty bead of pre-cum that has gathered there. His taste is new, unfamiliar, but not unpleasant - almost clean and without the taste of battery acid some of the men you work with have -  and you relish the sounds he makes in response.

Heeseung’s reaction is immediate, his hips bucking slightly as a strangled moan escapes his lips. You place your hands on his hips, holding him steady as you begin to move, your mouth sliding up and down his length in a slow, rhythmic motion. The intimacy of this act, the connection you feel with him, makes your own body respond, a warmth pooling between your thighs.

His fingers dig into the sheets, his knuckles white as he tries to keep himself grounded, his breaths coming in short, sharp gasps. You can feel the tension building within him, the way his body trembles with each pass of your lips and tongue. You can sense his struggle to remain composed, his vulnerability on full display, and it makes you want to give him everything he needs.

Heeseung is doing everything in his power not to bust a nut right now, holding back as best as he can. He is also trying not to scream out a tiny ‘Yipee’ at the feeling of your tongue swirling the head of his cock. He’s trying to think of anything that isn’t sexy; his gran, Tony Blair, the old milkman that he swore spat in the milk before he delivered it. Yet, nothing is working because you are that fucking good, your mouth is driving him crazy that he genuinely thinks he could go insane.

You increase your pace slightly, your hand joining in to stroke the base of his shaft in time with your movements, and you can tell he’s close. His moans grow louder, his hips straining against your grip as he teeters on the edge of release. The power you hold over him in this moment is intoxicating, yet you wield it with care, wanting his first experience to be unforgettable.

And unforgettable it will be because just as Heeseung is seeing stars, the door swings open, revealing an angry and brute man. His face is red, sweating from the heat outside, his bald spot gleaming in the overhead light from outside, and his beer belly hanging over his two-sizes-too-small jeans, barely covered by the black worn-out t-shirt.

Charging in, he grips your hair, pulling out chunks of it and possibly some of your scalp as he rips your mouth off of Heeseung’s painfully hard cock. You scream in agony, tears pricking your eyes as he drags you around the room like a ragdoll.

Heeseung's euphoria crashes into a pit of dread, his heart pounding in fear as he scrambles to understand what’s happening. The shock freezes him momentarily, but seeing you in pain snaps him into action. He leaps from the bed, his mind racing with panic and the urgent need to help you. 

But he doesn’t know what to do, his hands trembling and stomach tied in knots as he watches the man lift you up by your hair swinging you around as if you are nothing but a paintbrush he is trying to beat dry.

“You little slut!” the man yells, grabbing your throat with his free hand and pushing you against one of the walls. “This is my session, bitch. I pay you to fuck me, not suck off this toothpick!” The grip on your throat tightens with every syllable spat in your face.

You kick your legs in a pathetic attempt to get the man off you, your air cutting off as your face burns red with struggle. You take a good look at the man and realise it’s your client who usually has your 2pm slot, the same man who tried to force himself on you in your last session and ignored your boundaries. It happens sometimes in this job but they don’t typically come back and try to kill you, at least not in your experience.

Girls at your old job warned you about this, sharing detailed encounters with disgruntled punters, but never did you think that you would be confronting one so early on. He used to be a nice guy, tipping well and never being handsy when it was uncalled for, so when he tried to slip it in a hole only reserved for birthdays, you instantly told him to get out and never come back.

Yet, here he is, choking you out in front of a man you barely know, probably terrifying him for the rest of time. He came here to lose his virginity, not gain trauma.

Heeseung's heart pounds with fear and anger. The man’s violent outburst had shattered any lingering nervousness, replacing it with a fierce determination to protect you. His initial shock melts away, leaving only a raw, primal need to help you. He can't let this happen, not after what you've done for him, not to someone who’s shown him such kindness.

His eyes lock onto the lamp on the bedside table, contemplating his next move. He isn’t equipped for this but he has to make sure you’re safe at any cost. You don’t deserve this, no woman does, you provide a service that most men take advantage of - but not him, he won’t let this brute of a man win. 

Apparently, you have the same mentality, your eyes searching the room for any object nearby. Your vision starts to black out, flashes of unconsciousness flickering over your eyes as you see a vase placed close to your right. It’s a stretch, but you reach out to grab it, your arm going limp and legs losing the fight but that determination in your body courses through and creates enough adrenaline to pinch the top of the vase.

With a swift motion, you lazily but forcefully thump him over the head with it. The blow lands with a thickening thud and the vase shatters into pieces, some of it cutting your arms as they ricochet down onto the ground. The grip on your throat eases ever so slightly as the attacker’s eyes roll to the back of his head for a moment, giving you the much-needed chance to breathe.

Heeseung, caught up in planning his own attack, grabs the lamp, the weight feeling solid and reassuring in his hands. He doesn’t think twice as he swings it with all his might, aiming for the man’s head.

“Let her go!” Heeseung screams, his voice cracking but filled with rage. He catches the man again with the base of the metal lamp, this time on his temple, forcing him to stumble back.

You gasp for air, collapsing to the floor as the man’s grip finally releases. Focusing your eyes on his face, you see the life drain from his body, the snarl that once painted his features now relaxing, face paling instantly as you see him wobble before crashing to the ground beside you.

Clinging to yourself out of adrenaline and fear, you cough, still gasping for needed air and that’s when you see it, the blood rushing from the guy’s head, leaking onto the carpet and staining it crimson with every passing second. Heeseung notices the damage just as quickly as you do, eyes widening and his head shaking, adamant that the man can’t be what he thinks he is.

“Oh my god,” Heeseung whispers, his voice trembling with shock. He drops the lamp, the clatter against the floor barely registering in his mind. “Is he... did I...?” He stutters, unable to complete his sentence, the reality of the situation crashing down on him.

You swallow the lump in your throat, adrenaline puppeteering your body to scramble away from the body and stand up, your eyes trained on the man as your body searches for a perch to rest on. The telephone and trinkets clatter to the ground as you lean against the Chester drawers, your heart pounding so loud you swear you can hear sirens.

“We…we need to call an ambulance,” Heeseung mutters, looking between the man and his own murderous hands. He can’t believe he caused this, a man is lying on the floor, gushing blood from his head all because of him.

As soon as the sentence leaves Heeseung’s mouth, your eyes shoot to him in bewilderment, mouth drying up at the thought. “We need to get out of here, Heeseung, we can’t call an ambulance.”

“We can’t just leave him here!” he protests, mirroring your confused expression.

“If an ambulance comes, then the police will, and we are fucked,” you exclaim in a rushed whisper, aware of your surroundings in the thin-walled hotel, not to mention the fact that the door is still wide open for anyone to stumble upon the brutality that has just occurred.

“It was self-defence!” he retorts, pointing to your neck as if punctuating the sentence with evidence.

You tremble, holding your throat and shaking your head, tears brimming in your eyes despite the urge in you to stay strong; you have never once been a crier, and you refuse to start now, not when you need to keep your head in the game and stay focused. “I’m a sex worker, Heeseung! They’ll lock me up in a minute and blame me for everything.”

Your brain betrays you, flashing with what could happen to you if the police even caught a whiff of you being here. It would automatically be your fault, no matter your plea of innocence. The authorities hate you despite most of them using call girls to relieve themselves in ways they won’t let their wives. You can see it now: the media frenzy, the courtroom, the cold, judgmental eyes of the jurors.

Heeseung’s eyes widen with understanding and fear, his breath coming in quick, shallow gasps. “What do we do?” he whispers, desperation lacing his voice. “I can’t go to jail, Y/N, they will eat me alive.” 

Looking at him, you see how scared he is and you suddenly feel remorse over every other emotion that swirls in your body. He might have battered him over the head but it was you who was behind the reason; the boy felt an obligation to help you because he was here and afraid for your wellbeing. There is no way you can leave him to face this alone. It gnaws at you because you knew you should have either moved time or location, your gut telling you to do so only yesterday, but you ignored it, telling yourself that you were overreacting.

“We need to get out of here. Now,” you say with urgency, reaching over the dead weight of a man and grabbing your robe, tying it quickly around your practically naked body. “Grab your stuff, we’ll go down the back stairs, my car is in the worker's lot.”

“Where would we go? They know that we’re here,” Heeseung protests, running his hands through his hair in frustration, grabbing handfuls and tugging harshly as if trying to wake himself up from this nightmare.

Exasperated, you roll your eyes and snatch your bag from the end of the bed. You manoeuvre yourself around the room with desperate urgency, the breaths you are heaving out fueling you to think straight and keep to a plan. It’s pure fear that is driving your body right now, but you don’t fight it. Instead, you let it take you to safety and away from the carnage that you suddenly don't dare to look at.

Seeing you move with immediateness to the door, Heeseung subconsciously follows you like a lost puppy. Unfortunately for him, his fight-or-flight response has a third option: go into a state of haze. He doesn’t know what to do, and the bright idea that caused the mess before him only makes him doubt his mind about the next move, so he’ll follow you for now.

As you glance back at him, you see one slight issue, causing you to halt in your tracks, sparking confusion on his face, those bambi eyes you noticed now in full swing, making your heart flutter in the most awkward of times. Shaking it off, you turn your body and look down. “Uh, Heeseung?”

“What is it? What’s wrong, Y/N?” he asks nervously, his voice trembling with uncertainty.

Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath, steadying yourself before you speak. “You might need your pants,” you explain, opening your eyes and glancing pointedly at his semi-hard cock.

Heeseung’s face flushes a bright red, emulating the shade of a ripe tomato before he nods. His eyes dart around the room, searching for his clothes, only to spot his trousers and pants trapped under the dead man’s body. The sight of it sends a fresh wave of panic through him, his breath hitching in his throat. “Oh no... they’re under him,” he mumbles, his voice tinged with dread.

You take another deep breath, steeling yourself. “You have to move him, just enough to get your clothes. Can you do that?”

“Oh, yeah, just watch me heave up a 300-pound man off my Levis. Look at me, Y/N, I’m hardly a fucking gym rat.” The deflation and anguish in his voice are palpable as he walks around to the side where his jeans lie trapped.

You know he doesn’t mean to be rude to you, that it’s the fear talking, but you do miss when he was shy and couldn’t even form a coherent sentence without stuttering. At least then he wasn’t semi-shouting at you.

“Okay, okay,” you say softly, trying to calm him down. “We’ll do it together. I’ll help you.” You crouch down beside him, the closeness of the dead man making your stomach churn, but you push through it. You have to.

Heeseung’s hands are shaking as he reaches out, his fingers trembling as they touch the dead man’s shoulder. You can see the revulsion in his eyes, the sheer disbelief that he’s in this situation. With a deep breath, he steels himself, looking at you for reassurance.

“We can do this,” you say firmly, giving him a small nod. “On three, okay? One, two, three.”

Together, you heave, your muscles straining as you push the heavy, lifeless body just enough to free Heeseung’s clothes. The man’s weight is immense, and it takes every ounce of strength you both have. The dead weight shifts slightly, and Heeseung quickly grabs his trousers and pants, pulling them free with a grunt.

“Got them,” he says, his voice a mix of relief and horror as he scrambles to his feet, stepping away from the body as quickly as he can.

You stand up as well, wiping your hands on your robe, trying to rid yourself of the feeling of death that clings to your skin. “Hurry, put them on. We need to get out of here.”

Heeseung nods, his movements hurried and shaky as he pulls on his trousers and pants. The adrenaline pumping through his veins makes him fumble with the buttons, his hands still trembling. You watch him, your heart pounding in your chest, willing him to move faster.

Once he's dressed, you hastily grab his hand, pulling him out of the room and leading him to the backstairs, aiming for your trusty old Austin Metro. Your heart feels like it's about to burst out of your chest, the adrenaline of fear coursing through your veins. How could this happen to you? You were just trying to live your life and make some money, not become an accomplice to murder.

Heeseung's thoughts mirror yours, his mind reeling at the sudden turn of events. All he wanted was to lose his virginity, not become entangled in a murder. As his feet scurry behind yours on the stone steps of the hotel, he realises there's no way out of this. There's no one to save him; this experience has irrevocably altered his life, but not in the way he ever imagined.

He walked into that room as a virgin, but now he's leaving as a murderer.

taglist (closed): @yzzyhee @intromortal @zerobaseone-zhanghao @hooniehon @deobitifull @alvojake @sageryuri @slut4hee @binniesbabe @vveebee @minniejenseo @jebetwo @seunghancore @laurradoesloveu @yongbokified @jaehoonii @jaeyunluvr @melonvrs @criminalyun @enhastolemyheart @fakeuwus @flwrhoes @rayofsunshineeee @moonlighthoon @jaehyuniewifeu @en-ternals @haechonly @got-sunghooned @brownsugarbaybee @heeseungspookie @sunpov @who-tf-soddhi @bambangan

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Loser keyboard warrior… ugh he’s so cute

clementine ☆ heeseung lee

☆ non-idol! heeseung x fem! reader ☆ summary: heeseung was home for the summer. but so were you, the one girl that he's always hated since your playground days. the worst part was that you suddenly got hot, and now he had no idea what to do with himself. unfortunately, an entire year of not seeing each other creates the perfect conditions for one of you (or both of you) to catch feelings! ☆ genre: fluff, college! au, loser!heeseung, boyfailure x girlboss, nerdy heeseung LOL, childhood enemies to lovers, neighbors au!, humor, #patheticmen, suggestive-ish but not rlly ☆ warning(s)? loser!heeseung is SO awkward you might get embarrassed MEOW ☆ word count: 16.1k words ☆ based off the song "clementine" by grentperez. i hope this feels summery and cutesy hehe

Heeseung swore that he was going crazy.

Because why on earth was he actually attracted to you?

You, who used to kick over his sandcastles in the sandbox. You, who always hogged the slides at the playground. You, who always made a point to get him first in a game of tag. You, who always rolled your eyes at him no matter what he said. You, who made it clear to him and everyone on the face of the earth that you couldn’t stand him.

Heeseung couldn’t believe that he was even thinking about it— Why were you hot?

It's been about two weeks since Heeseung returned home for summer break. He'd finished his first full term at UC San Diego, majoring in communications. He had been living in the dorms the entire year, so it's been quite a while since Heeseung had been home.

Unfortunately for him, it seemed like nothing had changed.

They always said that adulthood and college really changes a person. But Heeseung felt the same as always.

All throughout middle school and highschool, Heeseung's summer days were often spent indoors. Reading books, drawing in his sketchbooks, playing video games, talking to his friends, and sometimes even laying in complete silence and just staring at the ceiling. 

And all these years later, Heeseung was still doing the same this summer. 

It's only the beginning of summer, but Heeseung has done next to nothing. He's seen his old friends maybe once or twice, and really only went outside from time to time to take out trash or help his mom water the plants in the backyard.

Truthfully, nothing about Heeseung has changed. He was still the quiet, introverted guy that liked time alone.

Nothing has changed.... all except one thing.

And it was driving Heeseung nuts.

You.

You were the neighbor girl, and consequently, someone that's shown up in every stage of his life. Your parents quickly became friends, so your families were closely intertwined and spent a considerable amount of time together.

The two of you went to the same high school, middle school, elementary school— heck you even played at the same playground. 

And for some reason, you just loved to torment him. It was never anything serious, but any opportunity you got, you would bother him and just be the most annoying person ever. 

Everyone in his life insisted that you were just the best little angel, but that couldn't be any further from the truth. You were mean and childish and insufferable.

And to make it worse, you always seemed to beat Heeseung at everything. Ever since your elementary school days, you somehow always got a better score than Heeseung, whether it be an assignment on coloring shapes or your AP US History scores. His parents and your parents always reassured him that he was good too, but how was he supposed to feel encouraged when you just beat him at everything?!

And you never failed to let him know it, too. You always had that sly little grin.

You even beat him in getting into his dream university. It's not really your fault technically, because it was your dream university, too. But it's the principle of it!

Heeseung couldn't help but narrow his eyes and clench his fists when he heard his mom talk about how well you're doing at UC Irvine in your prestigious little public health major.

Hate was too strong of a word, but he couldn't say that he liked you at all.

Which was why Heeseung felt his sanity slipping away.

The last thing that he expected when he came back for the summer was for you to get hot. And boy, you were hot.

It was actually infuriating how attractive you got.

Sure, Heeseung's seen you grow up beside him, but in his mind you were always the snotty six year-old that stole his candy. But after an entire year of not seeing you, he couldn't help but gawk at you.

Look, he wasn't actively seeking you out. 

Just, every time that Heeseung was out watering the plants or helping with yard work, you just so happened to peek your head over the garden wall to say hi to his dad. Your face always scrunched up when you caught a glimpse of Heeseung, murmuring a tight-lipped greeting to him too before your head dipped back under the wall.

The first time it happened, Heeseung's jaw nearly dropped. Because since when were you pretty?

The second time that Heeseung saw you was at the local ice cream parlor near the pier. In all the ice cream parlors in Orange County, you just had to go to the same one as him. 

You were wearing a bikini top with denim shorts, sunglasses atop your head. Clearly, you had just been at the beach. You had a group of friends around you (after all, between the two of you, you were the social and popular one), yet Heeseung could only look at you.

There was just something about the way the bikini top hugged your body. Maybe it was the droplets of water running down your chest. Or maybe it was the way you swayed to the faint background music of the parlor, your face looking relaxed and dreamy. Or maybe it was the way he felt so goddamn small next to you, despite having screamed and yelled and fought with you so many times in his childhood.

Since then, it felt like you just popped up everywhere. On days that Heeseung's brother or cousins forced him out of the house, you somehow managed to be where he was. And every single time, he'd just stand there and ogle at you. Even when his brother or cousins would say hi to you and strike up a conversation, Heeseung was always rendered speechless, too busy looking at the way your lips moved to truly register anything.

It almost made him angry. How dare you become hot over the past year? How dare you make him feel so stupid?

In every way possible, you were glowing. 

And it was killing Heeseung.

Heeseung let out a sigh as he sunk down onto his bed. 

It was already 8PM, yet the sky outside was still amidst the sunset. His fan was blasting, and so was his house's AC system— he even opened up his windows— yet it was still too hot.

Jamming his earbuds in his ear, Heeseung picked at the hem of his t-shirt, ignoring the way that the hair on the nape of his neck clung to his skin due to sweat.

Heeseung, even throughout college, called his friends a lot. But now that it was summer, all his friends were busy on vacation or having plans, and didn't have a lot of time to call.

Heeseung listened to the ringtone, tapping his fingers impatiently.

Finally, the ringtone stopped.

"Hey, man," a familiar, deep voice rang in Heeseung's ears. "What's up?"

"Jay!" Heeseung cried.

Jay Park was Heeseung's best friend all throughout his life. Although Jay was a year younger than him, that never was a problem in their friendship. Jay had just graduated high school, and he'd be attending UC San Diego with Heeseung next term. 

Out of everyone at home, Jay was the one person that Heeseung spoke to the most. 

He told him everything, and if he didn't, Jay always managed to get it out of him one way or another.

"What's on your mind?" Jay huffed. He always sounded exasperated, but he meant well. The moment that he graduated, Jay went back to his hometown in Seattle to meet with family. Luckily, Heeseung caught him before he left to congratulate him. Otherwise, Jay's been busy, so Heeseung appreciated him taking the time to talk to him.

Unfortunately, Jay knew Heeseung too well. Of course there was something on his mind— You. But Heeseung would rather die than admit it, even to his closest, most trusted friend. Not only was it embarrassing, but Jay's heard and witnessed it all. Heeseung would never live it down if Jay found out.

"Nothing!" Heeseung said in a sing-songy voice. "I just miss my best friend soooooo much."

Jay was fun to tease.

"Yeah, yeah." Heeseung could practically hear Jay roll his eyes, scowl, and scrunch his nose over the phone, something he did whenever he was embarrassed. "Well, I had a feeling that there was something on your mind. You never spam me with emojis unless you have something serious to talk about."

Heeseung scoffed playfully. Jay really did know him too well. 

"Nope!" Heeseung said, popping the p. 

"Right," Jay responded, and the older could tell that he was suspicious. 

A few moments of comfortable silence fell over the two of them. Sometimes, they didn't know what to say to each other, but being in each other's presence was enough.

"Oh!" Jay suddenly exclaimed, "I just remembered something that I wanted to tell you!"

Heeseung hummed in response. It was probably some crazy gossip about a teacher from their old high school getting arrested.

"But, you need to promise me that you won't tell anyone," the younger boy said, his voice eager and impatient. "Like, you can't tell anyone."

Heeseung hummed again. "Yeah."

"No, like, promise me," Heeseung could hear the fervor in his friend's voice, almost as if he's been holding this information back and was just itching to tell someone. 

"Is it that bad?" Heeseung chuckled. "You're scaring me, man."

"Promise me," Jay repeated.

"Fine," Heeseung huffed, crossing his arms. "I promise I will not tell anyone. Not a single soul."

"Okay, okay," Jay took a deep breath over the phone. Just by the sound of it, Heeseung could tell that he was about to burst if he didn't tell someone now. "So, a few weeks ago— I don't know how it slipped my mind, I was going to tell you the moment I found out— I was in Macro, and do you remember that one girl Natty, or something? The one with the bangs, like, the one that dances, and—"

"On with it!" Heeseung interrupted impatiently.

"Okay, well, Natty asked me if my friend Heedeung Lee was dating anyone, and I was like 'Who is Heedeung Lee?' so I just looked at her like she was crazy and so she never spoke to me about it again until—"

"Hurry up!" Heeseung groaned. Jay talked a lot. "Get to the point, please!"

"I'm getting there!" Jay yelled over the phone. "Well, basically Natty told me that her friend told her that [Name] [Last Name] used to have a massive crush on you."

.

.

.

"Huh?"

You, [Name] [Last Name], had a crush on him? 

On Heeseung Lee?

"I know!" Jay laughed over the phone. "That's crazy, isn't it?"

"Wait, wait, wait," Heeseung's lips moved faster than he could think. He could feel his ears burning, and they stung like hell. "Who told her?"

Jay paused to think. "Natty said that Ryujin Shin told her."

Ryujin Shin was your good friend. She wouldn't lie about something like this. Jay's source was definitely trustworthy.

Heeseung's heart was now pounding in his chest. His palms felt clammy. 

He simply couldn't process it. You? Liked him? It just didn't make sense. And after all the thoughts that he's been having about you, it didn't feel right. Something must be mistaken, right?

"When?" Heeseung blurted, swiping his tongue over his bottom lip. "When did she like me?"

"Hmmm," Jay hummed. 

Surely, you liked him in elementary school, right? There was absolutely no way that you liked him any time recently. That's impossible!

"I think she liked you..." Jay trailed off, thinking, "I think she liked you all throughout highschool."

Shit.

"I mean, I think everyone knew. It's not that surprising to me, I'm more surprised that you didn't know all this time. Like, it's so obvious— she was so obvious—"

Heeseung hung up.

"Heeseung?"

Wow, has grass always been that green?

"Heeseung, what are you—"

Heeseung never knew the world could be so beautiful. The sky was so blue and the clouds were so fluffy.

"Hey, Hee—"

What's that bright ball in the sky? Why was it yellow and so warm? Is that what people call the sun—

"Heeseung!"

Heeseung was pulled out of his daze as his older brother shook his shoulders.

It's only been a few days since Jay told the news on Heeseung, but it felt like weeks. Since then, Heeseung has gone outside more times than he ever had. He'd sit in the front yard and feel the grass under his fingertips, reconnecting with nature after such a bomb was dropped on him. Other days he'd dip his toes in his pool, just basking in the sunlight, and sometimes he'd go on walks, taking time to appreciate the world around him.

After all, if Heeseung stayed all cooped up in his room, he didn't know what he would do with himself.

Truthfully, nothing has ever impacted Heeseung as much as the fact that you liked him. Genuinely, Heeseung has never felt more confused, distraught, distressed, and downright afraid in his life.

Because... How could he?

Heeseung wouldn't be completely truthful if he said he didn't think you were attractive before this summer. How could he not? There was a reason that you were popular at school. You've always been cute. It was just your personality that made Heeseung hesitant to admit it.

But to think that you— the you that always went out of your way to get on his nerves in every capacity— had a crush on him? Absolutely insane.

And the craziest part was that your crush was obvious to everyone but him. Heeseung made a point to ask all of his old friends as discreetly as possible. Same answer every time:

"Yeah man, she was soooo in love with you."

You? Obvious? With your crush on him? Absolutely not!

This was not something that Heeseung would have expected in a million years!

And the nail in the coffin was when he asked Ryujin Shin herself.

"Oh yeah, she used to make me pick out her outfits to impress you," was all Ryujin had to say in order to kill Heeseung.

It just didn't make sense! Heeseung genuinely couldn't believe it. Of all the people in the world, you had a crush on him? It's not like no one's ever had a crush on him, but it's literally you!

Every time Heeseung thought about it he felt light-headed.

Currently, Heeseung was standing under a tree, cooling off from the rising weather. He had agreed to go on a walk at the park with his older brother. After all, after everything, he needed to touch grass. 

"You've been spacy lately, Hee," his brother nudged him. Heeseung was grateful that his brother was also back from university for the summer. "Everything okay?"

"Y-Yeah..." Heeseung murmured in response. 

Wow, the dirt felt nice under his shoes. He could feel mosquitoes biting at his ankles, but the hot weather was making him too exhausted to care. He should go outside more often. Maybe he'd be less distracted. And he wouldn't think about you.

Heeseung's brother smacked the back of the younger boy's head. "You sure?"

Heeseung chewed on his bottom lip. His mind was completely fried, blank. He couldn't think.

"Hellooooo? Earth to Heeseung?"

Radio silence.

Yeah, he was cooked.

It took Heeseung an entire week to even be able to think of your name without wanting to pass out.

He didn't completely come to terms with it, but he was at a point that he'd gone over the thought too many times for it to sting anymore. Still, Heeseung couldn't stop thinking about you.

All this time you liked him and he didn't notice. Probably because you tormented him the entire time. Not quite flirting, in his opinion.

What made matters worse, though, was the fact that Heeseung would see you from time to time. It was hard.

On one hand, you were an absolute treat to look at. 

Like, wow.

Anytime he caught a glimpse of you, whether over the fence or through the kitchen window, Heeseung could physically feel his eyes get blessed.

You really were one of the most beautiful people Heeseung had ever had the privilege to lay his eyes on. He choked on his spit every time he saw you, it was insane.

On the other hand...

Ohmygodyouhadacrushonhim.

Seeing you was terrifying.

You were the one person that's always been his sworn rivalry... and this entire time you probably never saw him like that.

It was absolutely horrifying to think about!

Heeseung's cheeks felt warm at the thought. In fact, his entire body felt hot. He wasn't even sweating but his skin begged for a bucket of iced water to be poured on him. Maybe he should hose himself down later.

Maybe it was just the summer heat.

"You want me to what?!"

No, no, no!

"You heard me, young man," Heeseung's mom crossed her arms. Heeseung watched with eyes wide as saucers from his seat at the kitchen island as his mom organized the pantry. How could she be so casual?!

The world was ending. It's over.

"Nooooo," Heeseung cried, burying his face in his arms. "Mom, I can't!"

"Why not?" Mrs. Lee cocked her brows. "It's not like [Name] has a disease or anything."

Heeseung shook his head profusely. "I know, but—"

"Then what's so difficult about going over and saying hi to her? It's been an entire year since you guys have seen each other!"

Heeseung groaned.

And that's how he was forced to walk over to your house next door and say hi. He didn't know why his mom was so insistent, but it's probably because she was good friends with your mom, or something. Him and your families have always been close, so Heeseung was bound to interact with you this summer.

Heeseung dragged his feet as he walked over to your house. He really didn't want to see you.

At first, he thought you hated him, but now apparently you've liked him all this time? And he's also sexually frustrated so now Heeseung was just confused.

And lo and behold, the moment that your house came into view, there you were. 

You were in a swimsuit, sunbathing on your front lawn. You wore your chunky sunglasses that fit you too well, your pretty lips sipping on a fancy glass of coconut water.

Heeseung had to force himself to not gawk.

Goddamn, was all he could think, because goddamn were you fine.

The way the sun shone down on your skin made it hard for him to look away. You were completely relaxed, alone in your own world, yet you managed to still be glowing. Heeseung's mouth felt dry, his heart rate speeding up at the sight of you sprawled out on the lawn like that.

Heeseung's feet took him further than his mind could, too busy gaping at you. He stopped at the front of your house, just enough for you to notice him.

"Oi!" you yelled from your lawn, perching yourself up on your elbows in a way that made you even more attractive. "The fuck do you want, Lee?!"

Heeseung had to shake out of his daze. 

"H-Hey," he stuttered out, an awkward hand coming up to wave at you. Heeseung winced in his head, feeling embarrassment wash over him as you took off you looked over your sunglasses, shooting him a questioning look. 

He'd never been like this with you. Ever. The only memories that Heeseung had with you were just the two of you bickering. Never any shyness or awkwardness. So why was he so nervous now?

"Ummmm," you said. Heeseung recognized that tone: it was the tone that you used when you wanted to obnoxiously pretend to be confused to embarrass him. Usually, it would just annoy him, but this time Heeseung was actually embarrassed. "Hi?"

Heeseung could feel your judgy gaze under your sunglasses. You were definitely staring him down. Whether with love or with hate, he didn't know. But it scared the fuck out of him.

"Well, I'mgonnagonowbye!" Heeseung spouted before running off.

(Heeseung could tell that you were watching him as he struggled to get his front door open. In fact, he had to knock multiple times and yell for someone to let him in, because he was actually locked out. And the moment that he was let in, Heeseung ran up to his room, and slammed the door. Never again.)

Although you thought it would be 10x funnier if you didn't, you did in fact think Heeseung Lee was cute. Of course you did. Especially after a year of not seeing him, you couldn’t deny that he’d really grown into a man. He definitely got taller, and his voice sounded deeper too. The way the muscles on his biceps and forearms flexed when he did yard work gave you more of a reason to peek over the garden wall to say hi.

You thought your dumb little childhood crush on Heeseung had subsided by now. You felt a little bad for a while, for always being mean to him— but you just like him so much! 

When you went away for school, you were sure you’d forget all about it. After all, you had a feeling that your feelings for him were out of convenience: he was just a guy that you were close in proximity to. Plus, it was so obvious, too. He definitely knew all throughout high school and middle school how much you liked him. It would hurt your pride to go back to him.

But now that he’s back (and so are you!) you’re having second thoughts.

Sure, he was cute. 

Would you kiss him? Sure. 

Would you date him? The answer to that would be kept a secret. 

For now, you were just going to have fun with it. Whatever happened was not up to you anyway. 

Though, you’d be lying if you said that you never tried to impress him, especially now.

You told yourself it was in a condescending way. 

In a "look how hot I am" way. 

In an untouchable way.

Because you knew that he’d be looking anyway. He always did, even if he didn’t mean to.

And you knew for sure now, as you put on your fitted bikini top that he’d definitely be looking.

Lucky you, your siblings and cousins were close to Heeseung’s brother and cousins. When you were younger, everyone would gather in Heeseung’s backyard for a pool party. 

And now that it was summer, it was no surprise that there was a pool party at the Lee house today.

So here you were, in Heeseung’s backyard, dipping your toes in his pool. 

The Southern California weather was not doing anyone justice. The blue sky was clear, with no cloud in sight. The sun was high in the sky, beating down on anyone who dared to be in its presence. 

The air smelled of Mrs. Lee's lemon tree, sunscreen, chlorine water, and barbecue. Loud music boomed throughout the Lees' backyard, coupled with shouting, laughing, and the sizzle of the grill.

Everyone was here— Heeseung’s brother, his cousins, and all of your siblings and cousins— except the boy himself. 

He’s probably inside cooped up in his room, you thought with an eye roll. He always was. Whenever there was a pool party like this, he always came down the latest, after getting an earful from his mom about being a party pooper. 

You’d always hoped that he’d come down. After all, he was the only one your age, and you wanted to show off how cute you looked. 

That’s something that never changed. 

You pushed up your sunglasses, watching as the boys that you grew up with tackled each other in the water and screamed bloody murder. You couldn’t help but chuckle.

At pool parties like this, you usually found yourself sitting near the shallow side of the pool, dipping your feet in and just enjoying everyone's presence. 

Frankly, you weren't a fan of the water.

You were too busy splashing your cousins with water and laughing at how stupid they looked with their hair all wet and swooped around to notice the sound of a very familiar boy being dragged downstairs.

"Dude— Let go— Ack!" Heeseung's voice boomed all the way from behind the screen door. "Let go— Ow!"

You turned over your shoulder to see Heeseung himself standing at the entrance to the backyard, pouting like a child with his arms crossed over his chest. He was wearing swim trunks, but wore an oversized t-shirt over it.

Still, he looked as good as ever.

His tan skin, disheveled hair, and overall awkward and loserish look— you loved it too much.

You watched curiously as he stood there awkwardly while everyone else played in the water. 

You sighed. Some things never change.

You pulled your feet out of the pool, before walking with wet feet over to the cooler next to the grill to grab two Caprisuns. Then, you trudged over to where Heeseung was standing.

"Look who decided to finally go outside," you said with a deadpan tone. Usually, Heeseung would glare at you, maybe scoff and look away. But this time, his eyes just shakily shifted to your face. Weird.

You could see his eyes widen a fraction, before they traveled down to your bikini top. You had to hold back a smug grin— Good, he was looking.

You shoved one of the Caprisuns into his hand, while stabbing your own with the straw. 

He still stared at you, as if you were some kind of unicorn.

"Why do you keep staring?" you asked bluntly, quirking your brow at him. It was weird. Where was the annoyed Heeseung that fought back whenever you bothered him?

The boy tensed up, his eyes widening into saucers before he turned away from you altogether. 

Was he... sick?

You looked at him questioningly. Heeseung stood completely still, his back turned to you, gripping onto his Caprisun for dear life.

You sighed. You nudged him with your elbow. 

"I thought a school like UCSD would make you at least a little bit cooler," you began your way back to the pool, but stopped. You looked over your shoulder at him. "Still a loser."

And with that, you left him standing there.

Heeseung swore that he's not a loser.

Well, maybe he was just a little bit of a loser, but not that much. You called him a loser all the time, and it never really got to him. After all, you were cooler than anyone Heeseung knew, so your standard of coolness was off the charts.

Though, it did bother him a little bit this time. And for the life of him, Heeseung couldn't figure out why.

Eventually, he trudged over to the pool and dipped his feet in beside you. Though, he made sure to keep a big distance between the two of you. 

Heeseung didn't know what he would do if he was any closer to you. And plus, you'd probably start screaming anyway.

In fourth grade, he pushed you into the pool as a joke, without knowing that you didn't know how to swim. Since then, you made it a point to scream whenever Heeseung was near you at the pool, always claiming that he'd pose a danger to you, or something like that.

The music was nice, and so was the feeling of the sun on his skin. Heeseung just felt a little bit out of place, but he wasn't unhappy to be there.

Heeseung was lost in thought, a habit that he's had since he was younger— so lost that he didn't hear the splashing of the pool, so lost didn't hear his brother ask you why you weren't swimming, so lost that he didn't hear his cousins threaten to push you in if you didn't get in yourself.

But the moment that Heeseung heard your shrill scream, he was up on his feet.

In a few quick seconds, Heeseung's brother had hauled you up over his shoulder, ignoring the way that you wriggled in his touch, and threw you into the pool. 

It all happened so quickly before Heeseung's eyes, yet it felt like time slowed down.

As the water splashed in what felt like slow-motion, Heeseung watched as your eyes widened into large saucers, a loud shriek ripping from your throat. His breath hitched. Other than those sounds, he couldn't hear anything else: not everyone laughing, not the music, not the grilling, just you and him and the water.

Heeseung's lips moved faster than him.

"You idiot!" he shouted, and although his entire body felt like it was frozen in time, he was already halfway through throwing his t-shirt off. Heeseung tuned out the sound of more laughter. He could feel his blood boil. "She can't swim!"

With no hesitation, Heeseung dove into the pool, ignoring the cold sensation that sent goosebumps down his spine as the water engulfed him. 

There were some things that cannot be forgotten, and something that Heeseung knew he'd never forget was the way you wrapped your arms around him the moment that you felt his presence. Your once tense body relaxed immediately. You clung onto him, your eyes squeezed shut as stray tears spilled out. He could hear the raggedness of your breath, and just by your face, Heeseung couldn't even imagine the panic and fear that you'd felt. 

"Heeseung," you whimpered, grasping the boy as if you would die. You sniffled, pressing your face into his neck as your arms tightened around his torso. "Hee—"

Heeseung could feel chlorine water droplets slipping into his eyes, burning them. Yet, he didn't remove his hands from around you, not even once. As he stabilized the two of you in the water, he squeezed your shoulders comfortingly.

"You're safe," he said against your ear, "I got you."

The last thing you expected to happen was to be sitting on Heeseung Lee's bed.

He still had his shelf full of comic books and figurines. Except, the last time you really took a look at the shelf was when you were 13, and now six years later it was completely filled to the brim. The walls were still covered in superhero posters. In the corner of his room, there used to be a tiny little ukelele from when he was just learning how to play, but now it was replaced with a guitar.

You shivered, pulling your knees to your chest as you sniffled, holding the towel draped over your shoulders tightly. Your skin felt cold to the touch, but on the inside, you felt like you were burning up. Hot tears lined your eyes, threatening to stream out.

After that fiasco, Heeseung took you upstairs to his room. He left you a few moments ago to find you clean clothes.

You were angry. Why did they throw you in the pool? You thought it was common knowledge that you couldn't swim. You grew up with these people! How did Heeseung Lee remember and not anyone else? How annoying.

"Uh," Heeseung cracked his bedroom door open, poking his head in. You cocked a brow at him, especially when you noticed that he came back empty handed. "Just— Give me a second."

You watched as he went to his own drawers, taking out his own clothes.

"I— There's no girls living in his house," he said sheepishly as he handed you his clothes, unable to hide his red ears. "I couldn't find you— uh— girl clothes, so just— just take mine."

You just frowned.

Although you didn't do any swimming yourself, being thrown into a pool and drowning for a few moments was physically taxing enough. You didn't feel like moving right now, even if it was something as easy as changing clothes. You just put the clothes beside you on the bed, muttering a quiet thanks before pulling your knees even closer to your chest.

Heeseung stared at you. It was uncharacteristic to see you so... small. Someone so bothersome and mean to him, yet here you were curled up like you didn't want to be seen.

Heeseung would never admit it, but he felt bad for you at that moment.

Heeseung sighed.

He took a few more steps forward, standing in front of the bed.

"Scoot over," he said, motioning with his hands.

You looked up at him through your eyelashes. Your lips jutted out for a few seconds into a pout, but you huffed and nodded. Heeseung plopped down beside you, letting out another sigh. 

The two of you sat in silence like that for a few moments, both staring at the floor. In the distance you could still hear water splashing and music from the backyard.

"Thanks, by the way" you murmured, breaking the silence. You kept your eyes down.

"Huh?" Heeseung whipped his head over to you.

"I said thanks," you repeated yourself, this time louder and with annoyance. "You loser."

"Oh." Heeseung blinked. "Sorry."

It was silent again, before you clicked your tongue. You nudge Heeseung with your foot. 

"Why are you apologizing?" you sounded irritated, but Heeseung knew that that was just your natural tone when you weren't trying to be nice all the time. 

"I dunno," the boy shrugged. "I guess for being a loser."

You sighed loudly, your brows furrowing as you nudged him again. 

"You're taking me too seriously," you rubbed your temples. "I mean, you are a loser, but I don't really give a fuck if you are."

Heeseung blinked. "Huh?"

You groaned. "You're so dense. My point is, you have nothing to apologize for, including for being thick in the head and a loser."

.

.

.

"As a matter of fact," you grumbled. "I'm grateful for you. I'd be six feet under if it wasn't for you."

.

.

.

You finally turned to look at Heeseung. Your hand came up to flick his forehead.

"Ow!" Heeseung cried, his hand shooting up for his head. "What was that for— Ack!"

You grabbed a pillow and smacked him square in the head.

"What the hell?!" Heeseung yelled. He reached across you to grab one of his pillows, launching it at you, hitting you in the face.

But instead of fighting back like Heeseung expected, you threw your head back, falling back onto the bed. You were laughing.

"What are you—" Heeseung scrunched his face, before he grabbed another pillow and smacked you again. "What are you laughing at?"

You didn't respond, only continuing to laugh. Heeseung watched as you clutched your stomach, your eyes squeezing together as your lips parted, airy giggles pouring out.

His ears burned. Did he say something funny?

Had Heeseung ever seen you laugh so... light-heartedly? It seemed like the only times you'd laugh was when you were making fun of him. But here you were, laughing like he'd just said the funniest thing.

"Sorry," you said when you finally calmed down. You relaxed into his pillows, letting out a soft ah. You wiped your eyes, which had tears coming out from how hard you laughed. "It's just..." you glanced at him, "You were scaring me."

"Why?" Heeseung's brows furrowed. 

"You were, like, being so awkward," you said coolly. "I mean, you're always awkward, but you were being awkward in a weird, shy way. You weren't fighting back like you usually did."

You flashed him a cheeky grin. "But you seem to be back to normal now."

Heeseung stared at your face. 

Well, even if you were super hot now, and even if you had a crush on him, nothing would change the fact that the two of you were (no matter how much you didn't want to admit it) childhood friends. Heeseung wouldn't want anything to come between that. Even his own awkwardness. There was no use being weird about anything.

Maybe this summer was for the two of you to finally connect, rather than push each other away.

"Ew," you kicked Heeseung, "Stop staring, you freak."

Heeseung rolled his eyes with a chuckle. "Go change."

Truthfully, it was impossible to be awkward like this around you. Heeseung was awkward with everyone, including his own mother sometimes, but not you.

(By the end of the pool party, you and Heeseung had spent most of the time up in his room, which wasn't uncommon throughout your childhood. Though, the difference now was that you and him weren't arguing.)

Normally, on summer mornings, Heeseung slept until noon. But his slumber this morning was rudely interrupted by the sound of someone banging on his door.

"What the fuck?" Heeseung cursed under his breath as he trudged downstairs, still shirtless and groggy in his Minecraft pajama pants. He'd curse at his brother for not answering the door, but Heeseung remembered that everyone else in his family had a life that didn't include being home all day, unlike him. 

Heeseung hastily opened the front door, ready to yell at whoever was disrupting him at this time. It was probably one of those solicitors trying to sell him something, or some kid that accidentally threw a ball into his yard.

But when he opened the door...

"Hi, loser."

Heeseung slammed the door.

What the hell were you doing at his house at this time?! Granted, it was almost 11AM, but still!

"What the fuck?!" you began banging again, "Open up!"

"No!" Heeseung yelled from the other side of the door. "What are you doing here?!"

"Well, open up and I'll tell you!"

After this back and forth for a few minutes, Heeseung finally agreed on letting you in.

"Rude," you muttered, crossing your arms. "Didn't your mother teach you to not slam the door on people's faces?"

Heeseung grabbed the door, beginning to close it again. You jammed your foot inside. "Not so fast, little boy."

Heeseung rolled his eyes. "Explain."

You huffed. "I'm bored. Can we hang out?"

.

.

.

"What? Why?"

You pushed past the boy, stepping inside his house and making your way to the kitchen.

"I already said," you said coolly. "I'm bored."

Heeseung trailed after you. "It's too early!"

You shrugged, making a bee-line for the fridge, looking through it. Heeseung sighed. There was no reckoning with you. He took a seat at the kitchen island, letting out an annoyed groan.

You looked over your shoulder, quirking your brow at him. 

"Nice pajamas, by the way."

It was now that Heeseung realized that he was half naked with messy hair and his embarrassing Minecraft PJ pants.

His ears burned.

"I thought you were done with Minecraft," Heeseung could hear the teasing tone in your voice as a sly grin spread across your lips. "I guess some things just never change."

"Shut— Shut up!" And he scurried upstairs to freshen up and change. You chuckled.

Apparently, your definition of "hanging out" was gossiping in your car while devouring frozen yogurt.

"Why are you so surprised?" you asked, while indiscreetly stealing a strawberry from Heeseung's frozen yogurt.

"I dunno," he shrugged. "I just thought you'd have more extravagant plans for what a 'hang out' is."

You scoffed. "Like what?"

"I don't know!" Heeseung shook his head. "Maybe, like, going to the beach? Or going to the movies? What do cool people do these days?"

"Why would you think that?" you almost looked offended. 

"You were popular in high school, weren't you?" Heeseung reasoned. "I assumed that your hangouts were cool because everyone wanted to be there."

You scowled. "Okay, well, getting frozen yogurt is cool. I don't know what you're talking about." Heeseung shrugged again. "And plus, I chose this activity because I knew you wouldn't like the beach or movies."

Heeseung blinked. Did you really do that for him?

"Why are you looking at me like I killed someone?" you rolled your eyes. "Why would I hang out with you and only do stuff that I'd enjoy? It's not fun when the other person isn't having fun, you know."

"I—I know," Heeseung stammered. The corner of his lips lifted a little bit. "I just can't believe you have feelings."

An offended sound came out of your lips. You slapped his shoulder, once, twice, three times, ignoring his yelps.

"I'm sorryyyyy!" Heeseung cried, squirming away from you. "Ack! What is your problem, dude— Ow! I said I'm sorry!"

"Take that back, you freak!"

"I did...!"

Heeseung never thought that he'd wake up on some mornings and see you in his kitchen, scouring his pantry and fridge for food. 

At first, Heeseung found himself panicking every time he inevitably trekked downstairs, all groggy and shirtless, at noon and you were there munching on cereal.

"Why— What are you—" Heeseung would stare at you horrified, immediately feeling shy because he was shirtless. How could you be so... so casual?! "How did you even get in?!"

You'd just shrug nonchalantly, ignoring Heeseung's spluttering. 

"I asked your mom for an extra key," you had pulled out of your pocket. "See?"

And ever since then, it wasn't common for Heeseung to hear the front door cracking open, followed by the sound of rustling in the kitchen and living room.

Initially, Heeseung made a point to freshen up before clambering down to give you an earful for turning the TV's volume too high. He made sure to throw on a shirt, maybe brush his hair and teeth and wash his face. 

But the moment that Heeseung no longer relied on his biological clock and his alarm clock to wake him up because the ruckus that you'd make in his kitchen was loud enough to shake him out of his slumber, he realized that there was really no escaping you.

"Turn it down, will you?!" Heeseung would shout from upstairs, barely awake. You'd groan, but you'd comply. After all, it was his house that you were raiding.

It was weird. Heeseung never thought that he'd become comfortable with you like this, and in such a short amount of time. There was a level of friendship between the two of you no matter what. You'd grown up together, that was undeniable.

But Heeseung had always expected you and him to actually become friends through other means. He'd always thought that something bigger, more dramatic, would happen, something that would force the two of you to finally get along.

But all it took was for you to be bored one day and go to his house.

Had he been misinterpreting everything? All this time, Heeseung always thought that there was a wall around you, something that he couldn't break down. Yet here he was now, minding his own business while you ate at his kitchen island.

It made him think, was it college and summertime that made the two of you like this? Or has it always been like this, and he never noticed it?

It made him think back to his childhood.

He had so many distinct memories of you.

You pushing him down the slide, you calling him stupid, you pulling his hair when you were bored.

But there were also other memories, ones that Heeseung had to think hard about, ones that made him question whether or not his memory was playing tricks on him.

He could remember you following him upstairs after one of your families' dinners when you guys were six years-old. 

If there was something six year-old Heeseung and you could agree on, it was that the adults' conversations at dinner were too boring and convoluted to follow. 

Heeseung faintly remembered the way you paused briefly in front of the shelf in the corner of his room. It was the shelf that he displayed his comic books and superhero figurines on, a collection that he'd spent all of his allowance money on. 

Heeseung had ignored you as you messed around with his stuffed animals, opting to read his comic books in silence. You had crawled up beside him, your squeaky voice pulling Heeseung's head out of the pages.

"What's that?" you had asked him.

Heeseung's teeth sunk into his bottom lip. He remembered what happened after you asked that clearly.

"A comic book," young Heeseung had said annoyedly, shooting you a glare. "Duh."

Heeseung could distinctly remember how he felt at that moment. Embarrassment. His brother, his brother's friends, and Heeseung's own friends liked to tease him for his nerdy interests.

Six year-old you didn't take the hint, only further poking and prying him. Your fingers plucked one of the pages, curiously looking at the screen-toned pages and text bubbles. "What's it about?"

Heeseung had snatched the comic book from you, so hard that the page you were gripping ripped. His memory was fuzzy here, but from what he could recall, Heeseung got angry and yelled at you. He had pushed you, making you bump into his figurine shelf. One of his bigger and sharper figurines managed to knock over, falling and hitting your square in the face.

It was nothing serious, just a scratch, but you were crying by the end of it.

As an adult, Heeseung cringed at the memory.

Poor, awkward six year-old Heeseung, who thought you were making fun of him when really you were just interested.

And after that, you never asked him about his superhero comics again.

As Heeseung now peered at you scrolling through movies to watch, he couldn't help but notice how you hovered over all the superhero movies, before moving past them. He wondered how different things would have been if he didn't yell at you that day. In fact, he wondered how different things would have been if he didn't yell at you at all.

Because now that Heeseung thought about it, all of his memories of you annoying him were really just you wanting to talk to him. When you slapped his shoulder and called him stupid, it wasn't you trying to be mean to him. You were just like that.

Had he taken everything wrong all this time?

First, it started with you eating in his kitchen everyday.

The next thing Heeseung knew, you were forcing him to go outside everyday, one way or another. This must be the most sunlight that Heeseung has ever had in his entire life.

On some days, you wanted to go on walks around the neighborhood.

"Do you remember that house?" you asked him once, pointing to the house at the end of the block. 

Heeseung's lips lifted. "Of course I do. How could I forget?"

You chuckled. "Hell-bound dogs, right?"

Heeseung could remember the day. When you and him were ten years-old, you went trick-or-treating down the neighborhood. The house at the end of the block was new to the neighborhood, so the two of you kids had no clue what your new neighbor was like.

Big mistake. That year, Heeseung was dressed as a demon with a plastic demonic mask, while you were a witch.

The two of you had no idea that your neighbor would be so... afraid... of two children dressed as a demon and as a witch. 

As fast as you rang that doorbell, chanting trick or treat!, the two of you were sent running back home at full speed, with a shouting neighbor threatening to call the police on you "hell-bound dogs." And that's how that neighbor earned the name Ms. Hell-Bound Dogs.

Poor you.

"Do you think she's still alive?" you grinned cheekily, nudging the boy.

"Who?"

"You know..." you drawled your syllables, "Ms. Hell-Bound Dogs."

Heeseung scoffed. "Of course she is!"

"But it's been nine years!" you shrugged. "You don't know what happens in nine years."

"She wasn't that old," Heeseung reasoned. You sent him a look. The both of you collectively recalled that neighbor being a hag. "Okay, maybe we were just young, so everyone looked old to us."

You hummed. "You're right."

As the two of you approached that house, preparing to pass it, you were engulfed with silence. The neighborhood that you grew up in held so many memories. 

You and Heeseung had spent the entire walk pointing to various houses and obscure things in the neighborhood, recalling old stories of memories of the shenanigans that the two of you would have with them. Heeseung couldn't remember the last time he laughed like this. It wasn't the type of laugh that made him fall to his knees and well up tears in his eyes.

It was more like a laugh that felt mixed with a sob. In a weird way. Each laugh that tumbled from his lips felt so foreign, yet so familiar. 

The type of laugh that could only be elicited by an old friend.

And it was then that Heeseung realized that that's what you were to him. An old friend.

"I dare you to knock on Ms. Hell-Bound Dogs," you said suddenly. You loved to do this, even when you were a kid.

"No," Heeseung shook his head, hiding a chuckle. "I am not doing that."

"C'mon," you nudged him again. "It'll be fun."

Heeseung narrowed his eyes.

"And we'll get to know if she's still alive."

Heeseung looked at Ms. Hell-Bound Dogs' door.

He was curious.

And besides, it would be payback for chasing you two out all those years ago.

Heeseung sighed.

"Fine."

It couldn't be that bad, right? Heeseung and you were older now. You wouldn't be afraid of some old lady. Right?

Wrong.

Because the next thing Heeseung knew, you were carrying him princess style, running as fast as you could down the street. The both of you were cursing at the top of your lungs, shrieking for your dear lives. Heeseung's large body awkwardly draped into your arms, his arms clumsily around your neck, but the two of you were too scared shitless to care.

The moment that you reached the comforts of the Lee house, Heeseung and you caught your breath, keeling over.

After a few moments of just breathing, the two of you made eye-contact. 

At first, you just stared at each other, wondering what the fuck just happened.

But then a smile began to spread on your lips, then on Heeseung's lips, and suddenly the two of you were laughing. Laughing so hard that your stomachs hurt.

"She's way scarier than I remember!" you cried, clutching your stomach as you gripped Heeseung's shoulder for stability. 

"I— I know!" Heeseung laughed. He wiped away his tears, shoving his face in his hands. "I can't believe we just did that!"

And the second thing that Heeseung realized that day was that you, too, were a loser. 

"What’s got you smiling at your phone, Hee?" Heeseung’s dad asked him in the car one afternoon. The Lees had a short weekend getaway, and they were now on their way back. It was no denying that Heeseung had been on his phone much more than he usually was.

"Yeah," his brother nodded in agreement. "You've been texting a lot these days."

Heeseung's mother gasped. "You didn't get a girlfriend, did you?"

The whole car erupted, the tires of the Lee car skrrting against the wheels abruptly. His dad and brother whooped, while his mother excitedly squealed.

..... Except Heeseung heard none of this.

Because he had his earphones jammed in his ears, completely absent as he stared at the window.

The offense?

Heeseung was busy blasting your summer playlist.

Look, it wasn't because he liked you or anything. It was just that your summer playlist had all the songs that he liked! Maybe except a few...

The other day when Heeseung found himself in the passenger seat of your car chowing down on fast food, the two of you talked about music. Surprisingly, you had a lot in common in terms of music taste.

You guys ended up riding along the coastal highway late into the night, just sharing songs.

Heeseung remembered how the traffic lights reflected off your face, illuminating your pretty eyes. You chuckled at a few songs that came up.

"You know," you had smiled, but your brows furrowed, "Kai sent me this song when we were dating Sophomore Year."

And when another song came up, you furrowed your brows again. "I think EJ sent me this one when we were dating."

And again. "Oh! When I was dating..."

And for some reason, Heeseung couldn't bring himself to listen to any of the songs that your high school exes sent you. It could've been his favorite song, but for some reason, any association with your past lovers made Heeseung feel sick.

Heeseung couldn't figure out why he was so bothered. There were songs that he swore he could never hate, but it left such a bitter taste in his mouth that another man sent you songs.

Now, Heeseung's nose curled as he glanced at the song now playing.

I Wanna Be Yours by Arctic Monkeys. Everyone knew this song, so it shouldn't be a surprise that one of your exes sent you this. But still. Heeseung felt uneasy listening to it. He couldn't figure out why. It was such a weird feeling. His heart felt like it was throbbing in his chest, tightening at the thought of it.

By now, Heeseung was certain that Jay's earlier report about you having a crush on him was outdated. It's been a while since Heeseung's thought about it, and while it still made him burn up, he was convinced that even if you did like him, that was the past. There was no use in dwelling on it anymore.

His finger hovered over the skip button for a few moments, taking in the sound of the rough bass. 

Heeseung didn't know why he felt a sense of disappointment. Disappointed that you probably didn't like him like that anymore. 

Skip.

Sooo... you're not very successful at forgetting your mini crush on Heeseung. You swore that you could, especially because you thought you'd grown up.

But now as you watch the way Heeseung's big hands wrapped around the steering wheel, his eyes focused on the road while your collaborative playlist plays on repeat, you're finding it difficult to pull your eyes away from him.

He was just so... loserish. He was so awkward, and clumsy, and embarrassing, yet somehow every time you saw his grimace after he tripped over his feet yet again, it made you feel so warm.

One of your old highschool friends was throwing a party at her beach house, and you were invited. You didn't want to go alone, so you begged Heeseung to go with you. And after some hefty convincing, he finally agreed.

The two of you (mostly you) had spent the entire afternoon getting ready.

You made sure to put on your tiniest dress and tallest heels, glittery makeup across your face and curly lashes lining your eyes. 

As you fixed your lipgloss in Heeseung's rearview mirror, you glanced at him from the corner of your eye.

You had to sit Heeseung down and give him a lesson in fashion. He was really about to go to a party in a hoodie. His entire closet consisted of baggy t-shirts and hoodies, and while they looked damn good on him, he needed proper party attire.

You searched through his entire closet, and lo and behold, you found the compression shirt that Heeseung borrowed from his brother and never returned. 

You couldn't stop looking at the veins on his forearms, or the biceps on his arms that flexed everytime he gripped the steering wheel. You knew Heeseung worked out, but seeing his toned arms in the flesh made your cheeks feel warm.

Under his big doe eyes, pouty lips, and disheveled hair was a man.

It was hard to fully conceptualize sometimes— that you were no longer the squeaky teenage girl head over heels for your nerdy childhood friend. Instead, you were a woman, and so was he.

Heeseung's eyes fluttered over to you, sinking his teeth into his bottom lip as the two of you pulled up to the house.

"I don't think I know anybody here," Heeseung sighed, wringing his fingers nervously. As the two of you got out of his car and approached the door, he groaned, "It's gonna be so awkward."

"Relax," you grinned at him, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder. "Just stick beside me the entire time."

He chewed on his bottom lip. He was uneasy. You sighed, linking your fingers with his. His eyes widened into saucers, but you ignored it. You gave his hand a squeeze. 

"You're gonna be fine," you reassured, before dragging him into the party, hand-in-hand.

The moment that you stepped inside the beach house, you could feel Heeseung tense up, squeezing your hand. 

You couldn't blame him, for the bright strobe lights, booming music, and smell of sweat, alcohol, and drugs hit your senses immediately.

"Just follow me," you whispered to him. You shot him another smile. "C'mon. Let's get some drinks."

And despite what everyone liked to think, you were a law-abiding citizen. You were not about to get wasted, and you were under the drinking age anyway. You got yourself orange juice and Heeseung apple juice (something that you knew he'd like because you used to argue about it).

You found it a bit entertaining as you went around the house, saying hi to all of your old classmates and friends, while Heeseung followed you like a lost puppy. You had him hold you by the shoulders, finding it awfully endearing every time he squeezed them.

"I thought you hated her," he whispered into your ear after you just greeted someone, striking up an animated conversation with her. 

"I do," you chuckled. Of course Heeseung would remember. "She's why me and Taehyun broke up."

You heard Heeseung's breath hitch, a gasp in his throat. "Really? That's fucked."

You chuckled again. So cute. "I know."

Every time you encountered someone that Heeseung personally disliked, you could feel him gripping your shoulders. It was cute. 

"Is that Heeseung Lee?!" a squeaky voice suddenly filled you and Heeseung's ears. And the next thing you knew, Heeseung was being crowded around by a group of girls, leading him to be whisked away from you. You couldn't remember any of their names, but you definitely remembered who they were.

When you said that Heeseung was a loser, you meant it in an endearing, mean-but-not-really way. 

These girls were actual bullies in high school, and for a time, they'd bully Heeseung. If it weren't for you scaring them off everytime, Heeseung might be dead.

But there they were, crowding around and cooing at Heeseung, touching his arms and batting their eyelashes at them as if they didn't bully the shit out of him. 

"I didn't know you got so hot, Hee!"

"If I knew you'd be so strong, I would've fucked you in high school."

"What're you doing after this, Heeseung?"

You could sense Heeseung's discomfort. From the way that he recoiled from each touch, to the way his wide eyes occasionally met yours, to the way that his lips curled.

And it made your blood boil.

Not only were these the people that went out of their way to hurt him, here they were acting like Heeseung would forget just because they thought he was hot. Blatantly disrespectful.

Help me, his eyes read. And of course you did.

You marched over to where they were, creeping up behind Heeseung and grabbing his shoulder and yanking him backward away from the hoard. 

"Get behind me," you whispered to him, and Heeseung immediately complied. 

"Hi, guys!" you greeted with a tight-lipped smile. You could feel Heeseung's fingers playing with the lacing at the back of your dress, something he did when he was nervous.

"[Name]!" the girls exclaimed, but you could tell that they were unhappy with your presence. "We were just talking to ourHee."

"Oh!" You faked excitement, flashing them another smile. You narrowed your eyes at them, before reaching behind you to grab Heeseung's wrist. "Well, me and Heeseung were about to leave just now."

"Aww!" one of them whined, yet she still managed to bat her eyelashes at Heeseung, who shifted uncomfortably. 

"C'mon, [Name]!" another crossed her arms. You could tell that her tone was playful, but you knew better. "You got all the hot guys during high school. Let us have this one, won't you?"

You feigned a giggle. 

"No, sorry girl," you said in a chirpy tone. You didn't want to seem hostile. "This one's mine."

The girls blinked at you. "Yours?"

"Mhm!" you smiled again. You squeezed Heeseung's hand in yours, bringing it up to show them your interlocked fingers. "Right, Babe?"

Heeseung stared at you for a few moments, before nodding his head quickly, his tongue swiping over his bottom lip. "O-Of course, baby."

You craned your neck up to gently press a kiss on his neck, ignoring his surprised yelp, before you turned back to the girls. "We'll be leaving now. It was nice seeing you!"

And with that, you pushed through the crowd of people, making a bee-line for the door and taking Heeseung with you.

The walk back to Heeseung’s car was silent. When the two of you got inside, it was still silent. Heeseung didn't start the engine or the music. He just sat there quietly.

"I'm sorry," he finally blurted.

"Huh?" you cocked your head. "What are you sorry about?"

"I feel like I ruined the night," Heeseung murmured, a large frown on his lips.

"What?!" you furrowed your brows, reaching out to touch his arm. "No, no, no! You didn't ruin anything."

He continued to frown. The car shook just from how loud the music was, and you could feel the bass in your chest. 

"And you had to kiss me!" he continued, shoving his face into his hands.

You furrowed your brow. Did he not like it? Was he disgusted with you?

"You shouldn't have!" Heeseung continued rambling on, using his hands. Poor boy sniffled, and it was then that you noticed the way his doe eyes welled with tears. From the way he blinked quickly while turning away from you so that you couldn't see his face told you everything. "Now everyone is going to think that you're dating me!"

You were a little hurt. "Why is that a bad thing?"

"It's a bad thing for you," Heeseung muttered into his palms, sniffling quietly. "I'm a loser, [Name]. And you're not. What if everyone starts seeing you differently?"

Your hand ghosted over his shoulder. "Why should anyone's opinion matter to me?"

"Because!" Heeseung whipped his head over to you. With the sun setting, orange light reflected off his cheeks and red nose, as well as his glassy eyes. 

"Because....." he sighed, before stopping. "What, you don't regret it?"

You crossed your arms. 

"The only reason I'd regret kissing you is if you felt uncomfortable." You met his eyes. "Did I make you uncomfortable?"

Heeseung stared at you for a few times, before he whipped his head away again. But this time, it wasn't out of shame or remorse. You could tell by his shaky voice, pink ears, and rigid body language that he was embarrassed more than anything.

"No..." he mumbled. "The k-kiss... didn't make me uncomfortable. I actually kind of— Never mind."

If you hadn't known him all your life, you wouldn't have been able to tell that Heeseung was flustered. Flustered beyond reason. If you asked him a question about superhero comics, a topic that he knew front and back, he still wouldn't be able to give a coherent answer. That was how flustered he was.

How cute.

"Hmm?" you hummed, the corners of your lips raising. "Complete that thought."

Heeseung groaned something that you couldn't understand, shoving his face back into his palms. You chuckled as you pulled him away from his hands, gently clutching his jaw and forcing him to look at you.

"I wanna know what you were going to say, Heeseung," you rasped, unable to hide the slyness in your voice.

He let out an embarrassed squeak. Even if it weren't for the orange sunlight, you would still be able to tell how red Heeseung got. The warmth emitting from his face was so strong that you could feel it. Poor boy couldn't even look you in the eye.

So cute.

"I-I..."

You hummed. "Go on."

"I was just going to say..." Heeseung squeezes his eyes shut, something he did when he was so embarrassed that he'd explode. "I l-liked the kiss."

.

.

.

You opened your mouth to speak, but he continued to ramble on. "I-I mean I didn't mind it that much. Itwasjustnicewhenitcamefromyouanditmademefeelreallywarmandmushyand—"

"Let's get out of here, Heeseung," you interrupted him with a reassuring smile. "We can go somewhere else."

"L-Like where?"

You grinned.

Where it all began.

"The playground?"

Heeseung gaped as you pulled him out of the car. He let you drive this time, fully expecting to go somewhere like the pier or the end of some road where it was quiet. Not the playground.

"Yessir."

The playground near your neighborhood was nothing special. It had a spiral slide, swings, rock-climbing, telephone, a basketball court, hopscotch, and then some. It looked much smaller than you and Heeseung remembered.

This was where it all started, where you and Heeseung met as young children.

Things have changed since then. The swing set has been remodeled, the sandbox removed, and the railing have been repainted with a different color from your childhood.

"C'mon," you tugged on Heeseung's arm.

Heeseung stared at you. By now the sky was beginning to turn blue and the streetlamps were on. Even so, you still managed to glow. All his life, you glowed. You glowed so bright that you outshined him, so bright that you attracted everyone like a moth to a flame, and he never understood why.

But now he did.

The mischievous glint in your eyes, the grin spread across your face, and the way you called out to him to go play— it was like nothing changed. You were still you, still the cheeky little shithead that you always were. And he loved it. He loved you. Maybe he always had.

Some things really never changed. 

"Heeseung, push meeeeeee!" you shouted from across the playground. As a kid, Heeseung loved to collect rocks. As a grown-up he thought it was ridiculous, but now Heeseung couldn't resist the call of the rocks. 

Meanwhile, you were on the swings.

"You still don't know how to do it yourself?!" Heeseung yelled back. 

"I doooon't!"

Heeseung sighed, shoving the rocks that he collected into his pockets before trudging over to you. Though, not without chuckling to himself.

After running around the playground a little bit and taking a trip down memory lane and whatnot, you followed Heeseung to the basketball courts. In your middle school days, you remembered how Heeseung would ditch you at the swings to go play basketball.

You sat next to the base of the hoop, just far enough to not get hit.

You watched in awe as Heeseung dribbled the ball, passing the orangey ball from palm to palm. He was always good at basketball. You remember pressuring him in highschool to try out for the school team. And when he made it, nothing made you feel giddier than seeing the proud and excited look on his face. That's why you went to all of his games in secret, just to silently cheer him on. Of course, you'd never let him know that.

With each flick of his wrist to shoot the ball, you couldn't hide your amazement as he made every basket.

Every.

Single.

One.

Tall, strong, talented, and a loser.

Gosh, you wanted him so bad.

Him and his nerdy little antics.

On Heeseung's end, he made sure to play his best.

Sure, he was in his childhood basketball court. Sure, he wasn't playing against anyone else. But that was exactly why he had to do his best.

You were watching.

He'd never forget how you ran up to him after seeing him hoop one afternoon, exclaiming, "You need to try out for the basketball team!"

Back then, he thought you were being mean, but your words rang through his head enough that he actually did try out for the team. And he made it.

Now that he was an adult, Heeseung realized that you were anything but mean. If anything, you were encouraging him. 

And now that you were watching him play all these years later, Heeseung had to prove to you that your words were not in vain.

"Woooooow," you drew out your syllables as you watched, silently clapping your hands at each basket. 

Heeseung chuckled, jogging up to where you were. Letting the basketball roll across the court, Heeseung crouched down to your sitting figure, wiped the sweat on his forehead with the back of his palm.

"You're so good at basketball, Heeseung," you said coolly, trying your best to hide the fact that you were 100% gawking at him and his sweaty face.

Heeseung laughed as he caught his breath. The smell of the night air was making him feel so alive, so bold.

"All thanks to you," he breathed as he ran a hand through his sweaty hair. 

"Nah," you waved him off. "You're giving me too much credit. It's all because of your hard work."

Heeseung shook his head, lightly punching your arm. "It's your support that made me so good."

You shook your head. "Not at all."

The boy gave you a look, quirking his brow, almost like he was doubting you. "You think I never noticed you at my games?"

.

.

.

Shit.

"Y-You knew I was at your games?!" 

He knew all this time?!

!!!

Warmth washed over you.

All those times you screamed his name from across the court to cheer his name, all those times you snuck, all those times you jabbed at him for playing too much even though you spent too much time at his games.

Your cheeks felt warm as your hands found refuge on your head, shaking as you squeezed your eyes shut.

"No, no, no!" you cried. "That's so embarrassing!"

Heeseung's deep laugh made you even more embarrassed, especially the way he cooed at you and put a hand on your knee reassuringly.

"Of course I knew you were there," Heeseung said, putting a hand on his chin. "I knew it every single time. I don't think you missed any of my games."

You squeezed your eyes shut even harder, groaning. "Stooooop."

Heeseung laughed again, before clicking his tongue. He got back up and strolled toward the stray basketball.

You didn't know why, but his nonchalance and ease at picking up the ball made your heart pound. He was just so... strong.

Sure, he was a loser most of the time, but on the court, he was a completely different person.

As Heeseung began to dribble again, you had to admit that it was attractive.

With one more bounce, Heeseung snapped his head at you, meeting your eyes. 

"This one's for you."

Your heart drummed in your chest. This was the type of stuff that happened in movies, when the basketball player dedicates a hoop for their loved one. How were you a grown woman and still feeling giddy and nervous over this?

It felt like it happened in slow motion. 

You watched as the ball seemingly floated between his fingertips. The sound of the rubber ball as it collided with the concrete courts filled your ears, coupled by the sound of your heart pounding in your chest. 

Heeseung's tongue swiped over his bottom lip. With a flick of the wrist and a jump, he shot the ball up into the air. 

It stayed up in the air for what felt like an eternity, before it propelled forward.

There it was, its orange skin against the blue night sky.

And as gravity pulled it toward Earth, you held your breath.

Closer and closer, the ball inched toward the red-brimmed hoop.

And just as you held your breath...

The ball...

Missed.

.

.

.

You deadpanned.

Heeseung was going to dedicate a ball to you... and he missed the hoop completely.

That's...

So cute.

You snorted, before you keeled over, some of the hardest laughs of your entire light spilling out of your mouth. This was hysterical. You laughed so hard that your stomach hurt.

Heeseung was such a loser, and it made you feel like a little girl.

Meanwhile, Heeseung stood there, completely red in the face.

"Sh-Shut up!" he grumbled as you laughed. How embarrassing!

When you finally calmed down, you had to hold yourself back from cooing at how cute Heeseung's embarrassed face was. But you just look at him with a grin. 

"Try again."

And he did.

And it felt like suddenly the world was against him.

Just a few minutes ago, Heeseung made every single one of his shots.

And now that it actually mattered, he missed.

Every.

Single.

One.

And to make things worse, you laughed at every one of his missed shots.

"Heeseung Lee," you announced as he gave up, taking a seat beside you. "You are such a loser."

He groaned, pulling his knees to his chest. 

The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, listening to the grasshoppers sing their hearts out. 

Neither of you wanted to move. Because if you did, it would mean one step closer to this night ending. Of course, there was always tomorrow and the rest of the summer to see each other, but to be separated even for a little bit as night passes was too long.

It felt like so much had changed, but at the same time, it felt like everything was exactly as it was left.

Feeling a stroke of boldness, Heeseung guided your head onto his shoulder, before slithering his arm to wrap around your own shoulders.

You guys stayed like that for a little bit.

Heeseung gazed at you. You could be lost in thought or dozing off, he wouldn't be able to tell.

He wanted this to last a little bit longer than forever.

Something was changing and neither of you could tell what it was.

Maybe it was now early July, and the heat was unbearable. Or maybe it was the intense scent of bug repellent that had gotten to your heads. It could be all those frozen yogurts you guys ate in your car, or the amount of shitty superhero movies you binged together.

Whatever it was, it was changing everything.

A single atom was out of place, a molecule of carbon was in the wrong spot. Heeseung couldn’t put his finger on it.

The air felt so warm, but not in a humid, suffocating way. 

More like in a rosy way, like someone put a filter over Heeseung's world and now everything was more vibrant.

Heeseung had reason to suspect that you were the culprit.

He'd known you his whole life, and it was only up until recently that he understood why people loved you so much. Because who wouldn't? You weren't just beautiful, but so goddamn incredible. In every way possible.

Heeseung couldn't explain it. He didn't think he had a crush on you. 

In all the romance books and games and movies that he'd consumed, they portrayed crushes as this magical unicorn of all things. Nervous, awkward, clumsy, and an upward battle.

But when Heeseung thought of you, he didn't feel any of these things. 

He felt at home. Comfortable, as if he could be as much of a nerdy loser as he wanted and he'd still be treated the same way. 

Unlike all what fiction would tell him, you weren't some god to him, nor were you a venerated saint. You were just you, and that was already enough to make his heart race. 

There wasn't that urge to constantly hold your hands or kiss your lips (not that he didn't think about it!).

Rather, there was a need to always be with you, to be let into your world, to listen to every thought that you had, to hear your laugh until he fell asleep.

Maybe Heeseung didn't have a crush on you, but it was certainly something else.

And it was the same for you.

You've had crushes, and you've had boyfriends.

You always felt like you needed to be perfect for them, to be drop-dead gorgeous and put-together all the time, to be the kindest version of yourself.

But when it came to Heeseung, it didn't feel like that. 

You could be as brash and annoying as you wanted, without the fear that he'd shun you. In fact, Heeseung would fight back or laugh.

While with all your boyfriends you wanted intimacy, validation, and constant reassurance, Heeseung felt safe. 

You craved nothing from Heeseung except... Well, Heeseung himself. 

And it was driving you nuts.

Help!

It was another family dinner, with both of your families, this time at your own house.

Heeseung and you sat across from each other. From when you were children until now, the two of you still ignored everything that the adults said, opting to stare and make faces at each other.

Except this time, it was absolutely impossible to look at each other without bursting out laughing. 

You dug your teeth into your bottom lip, holding back a smile as you glued your eyes to your plate. If you dared to look up and even catch sight of Heeseung's hair, you'd probably laugh.

You gripped your fork. Even if you weren't looking at him, you still somehow could hear him. The way he obnoxiously and loudly poked at his food with his fork was something you always jabbed at him for, and it was still noticeable to you now. Except, instead of annoying you, it only made it harder to not laugh.

"[Name]," Ms. Lee's voice pulled you out of your thoughts. You looked up with shaky eyes, and when your eyes passed over Heeseung, you had to bite back a giggle. Alas, you weren't strong enough to hold back a smile.

"Yes?" you responded. From the corner of your eye, you could see Heeseung's nose scrunching. You sent him a quick glare, one that could only last a millisecond.

Don't you dare make a funny face or I'll spill my water all over you, your glare read. But it didn't seem like Heeseung cared.

"What have you been up to all summer?" Ms. Lee smiled. "Any summer programs?"

"No, not this summer," you answered politely. "I've just been—"

Your mother interjected, wiggling her eyebrows. "I've noticed [Name] and Heeseung hanging out a lot this summer."

From under the table you felt Heeseung kick you, but you still didn't dare look at his face. You had to bite inside of your cheek to keep laughter from tumbling out, your eyes wobbling.

"Oh, really?" Ms. Lee looked over at her son. "I didn't know you and [Name] were close, Hee!"

And this was when you unfortunately made eye-contact with Heeseung. Poor boy, his lips wobbled and twitched, trying his hardest to keep it in.

"Y-Yeah," he answered quickly, his voice shaking. That in itself was enough to make you let out a giggle. But before it could be uncontrollable, you clamped your hand over your mouth. You watched as Heeseung did the same, except this time, his face was bright red.

"That's so great!" you moms rejoiced. "We were so afraid that you guys would hate each other forever! You know, when you were kids, you used to..."

You and Heeseung tuned everyone out as they joined in the conversation about your old antics.

Instead, the two of you stared at each other, both completely blank-faced. But a simple look at you and it would be painfully obvious by the way your lips twitched that you were fighting for your life to not burst out with laughter.

And it was when Heeseung was taking a sip of water that you decided to make your attack on him. Just as he was raising his glass to his lips, you quickly made a face at him.

And just as fast as his entire face contorted, a loud laugh fell from his lips. Unfortunately for him, he still had water on his mouth. Poor boy began choking on his water, keeling over himself as he coughed up a storm. 

And while everyone was busy helping him, you were busy laughing your ass off.

You win this one, was the agreement.

"You were 100% playing dirty," Heeseung whined.

You rolled your eyes. "Who gives a fuck?"

After you and Heeseung were excused from the dinner table, the two of you went up to your room.

Currently, the two of you were just lazing around your room. Both of you were on your bed, but Heeseung laid upside-down, with his head hanging off the edge. Although you barely exchanged any words, it wasn't awkward. 

You scrolled through your socials, while Heeseung played his games on his phone. Just the two of you in your own worlds, occasionally breaking the silence to make a jab at each other or to show the other something.

"Oh my god!" you cried suddenly, tossing your phone aside and putting your face in your hands, your fingertips rubbing your temples. "What the fuck?!"

Heeseung, startled, looked at you concerned. "What happened?"

When you groaned into your palms, shaking your head profusely, Heeseung shut off his game, putting his phone away. He sat himself upright, shuffling over to you.

"What happened?" he asked again.

"Bad!" you cried, sinking your head into your pillows. "Horrible! Deplorable! Despicable!"

Heeseung stared at you questioningly, his brows cocking into an arch.

"Tell meeeee," he prodded you, watching as you only sunk back into your pillows. You grabbed one of your plushies and shoved your face into it, flipping over so that you could kick your feet. 

You groaned more, before you screamed into your plush. "I hate men!"

Heeseung poked you again, this time a little bit harder. "Tell meeeee. Did your ex text you?"

"Worse!" your words were slightly muffled, but Heeseung could hear the sheer irritation. "Way, way, way, way, wayworse!"

You did this a little bit longer, before you huffed and flipped yourself over once more. Sitting upright, you saw Heeseung sitting there patiently, waiting for you to explain to him what the fuck was going on.

"Okay so," you began, wincing at the next words you were about to say. "You know how my Instagram is public? So that anyone can message me?"

Heeseung narrowed his eyes. "Yeeeeessss?"

You grumbled something under your breath, taking Heeseung's hands in yours. You traced shapes on his palms and played with his fingers, anything to distract yourself from the godforsaken things you'd have to say next.

"Well," you sighed, shaking your head. "I got a dick pic from some random guy."

Heeseung blinked.

"Oh."

.

.

.

"Wait, you got a what?!"

Yes, you really received an unsolicited picture of some guy's dick. Insane, really.

It was now Heeseung's turn to tweak out. 

"Oh my god!" he fell back into the pillows, grabbing at his hair. How ridiculous! "What the fuuuuuck?!"

"I know right?!" you fell back with him. The two of you laid like that, your heads next to each other. 

It was silent again, save for the sound of your parents chattering downstairs.

"Did you block him?" Heeseung suddenly asked.

"Nope," you sighed loudly. "Not yet."

Heeseung hummed. 

He couldn't imagine how many times you'd probably encountered this type of situation. And if this was the first time, it was already too much. If he were in your position, he'd have absolutely no idea how to react either. He'd be paralyzed, with no idea what to do! Maybe except...

"Do you want to fuck with him?" Heeseung blurted.

"Huh?"

"You know..." the boy swiped his tongue over his lips, wringing his fingers. "Fuck with him."

You looked at him, your head tilted as if you didn't understand.

"I-I mean, if this guy's going to be disrespectful, it wouldn't hurt to give him a taste of his own medicine, right?"

You nodded, understanding. "But how?"

Heeseung's nose scrunched. He had many ideas, but he wasn't sure which one was the best. "Well, do you want to have fun with it or do you want to genuinely scare this guy off?"

You thought for a second, before a sly grin made its way across your cheeks. "There's no harm in having fun. I can just block him afterwards, easy peasy."

"Oh," Heeseung said. Then, a good idea popped into his head. His lips curved. "I have just the idea for that."

"Is this okay?"

"Hmm, a little to the left."

Heeseung's plan was funny, but it also made you feel... mushy.

The idea was for Heeseung to respond on your phone pretending to be your boyfriend, something that would probably scare the other guy off. 

After a little bit of stalking, you guys concluded that the guy was a frat bro, so it would be best to prepare some pictures for evidence.

The first picture you decided to take was one that showed just a small part of your back and shoulders in bed, just enough to make it seem like you were in bed with someone. That way, it would be believable if Heeseung pretended to be your boyfriend.

So here you were, laying in bed with the blankets strategically draped over you, pretending to be asleep, while Heeseung snapped 'candid' pictures. You turned off all the lights to make it more believable, so if your parents walked in now they'd be confused as all hell.

"It's a little blurry," Heeseung remarked as he looked at the camera roll.

"That's perfect," you rolled over, facing him. "It'll look even more candid."

The next picture that you prepared was a little bit more risky, but all the more impactful.

"So... So.. Uhm—" Heeseung's cheeks burned as he explained it to you. "I think it would scare him if he thought he was messing with a super buff guy, you know?"

"Uh huh."

"W-Well," Heeseung grimaced. "If I send— like— a picture of my muscles, or something, I think it would scare him off."

You blinked. "Is this just an excuse to show off your biceps?"

"No!"

As you tuned out Heeseung's rambling, you thought for a few seconds. If you were a guy, and some girl's boyfriend caught you trying to flirt with her, what would make you piss yourself?

Well, it would definitely be any explicit indication of intimacy... Your lips moved faster than your mind.

"What if you sent a picture of you with hickeys and lipstick marks?" you gushed.

Heeseung choked on his spit, coughing so loud that you thought he would burst a lung. His face was bright red, his eyes as wide as saucers as he stared at you horrified.

"A picture of me with what?!"

"Hickeys and lipstick marks," you said casually.

"And where would I get them?!" Heeseung was going to faint. If you said what he think you were going to say, he'd absolutely combust—

"Me, duh."

Flames. Absolute flames. That's what Heeseung felt on his skin. Were you just suggesting that you could give him hickeys and lipstick marks? His heart was pounding in his chest, so loud that he could barely hear his own thoughts.

"I mean, if you don't want to, we can just—"

"No!" Heeseung interrupted you, as if he wasn't as red as a tomato. "I can take it!"

And that's how Heeseung found himself sitting on your bedroom floor, his body so hot and hands clammy as he watched you roll up his sleeve. 

Here was the plan for this picture: You'd put a few lipstick marks and hickeys on his biceps and neck. That way, he could snap a quick picture of that area alone while flexing, effectively scaring off the guy.

(Or maybe this entire plan was a very poor excuse for Heeseung to pretend to be your boyfriend and for you to kiss him.)

"Have you ever gotten a hickey?"

Heeseung's cheeks flared. "N-No."

You quickly put on your most pigmented lipstick. Slowly, you leaned closer to Heeseung's neck. He could feel your breath against his ears, making him want to squirm away. You put your hand on the other side of him so that you could stabilize yourself.

"Well," you whispered. "It doesn't hurt, so don't worry."

You brought your hand up to Heeseung's hair, gently tilting his head back to get better access to his neck. 

"Can I...?" you rasped, wetting your lips.

"Y-Yes."

And with that, your lips attacked his neck. You made sure to press on firm kisses so that the imprint of your lips would be defined on his neck. 

With each kiss, Heeseung let out a quiet whimper, his eyes squeezing shut as his arm jerked out to grasp your arm gently.

He felt like he was dreaming, because here he was, having you kiss him. No intense build-up, no dramatic reason, just because it was funny and you wanted to fuck with someone. God, Heeseung would be lying if he said he never thought about what your lips would feel like. They were always so pretty, and so soft.

All throughout his life, Heeseung had never had a romantic experience. It was his first time ever being kissed on the neck, and goddamnit was he sensitive. The way your lips pressed against his skin made him feel so weak. 

He wanted to be closer to you, closer than whatever this stupid little plan was. He craved it.

His other arm came up to slither around your waist, pulling you even closer to him.

"Hees— Heeseung— Ah—" you pulled your lips away, both of your hands coming up to clutch his shoulders for stability. "What are you doing?"

Heeseung's pupils were blown out. 

"Get on top of me," he breathed desperately, "Please."

"Shiiiit," you cursed under your breath, before you plopped down on his lap, your legs on either side of his hips. 

The two of you locked eyes, staring into each other's swirling pools of color. You could've been lost in Heeseung's eyes for minutes or for hours, there wouldn't have been a difference.

Oh, how much you wanted to kiss him. Not just a stupid little kiss on the neck. You wanted to kiss him on the lips, kiss him so hard that he forgot his own name.

Yeah, you had a crush on Heeseung Lee. You always had, and it seemed like no matter what, you were always bound to be downright attracted to him. God, you wanted him so bad.

Meanwhile, blaring alarms were going off in Heeseung's head. 

He wanted to kiss you so bad. He wanted to drown in you, for you to be the only thing enveloping his senses.

Except... he had no idea how to— he had no idea now to express that. And it was making his head spin.

You opened your mouth to speak, not realizing that Heeseung, too, had something to say.

"Hee—"

"I—"

Both of you shut your mouths so quickly.

"S-Sorry," you stuttered. "Go ahead."

Heeseung blinked a few times, before he shut his eyes. You watched how he parted his lips, yet no sound came out, almost as if he was searching for the words in his head to say. 

"I-I—" he started, before cutting himself off. His eyes squeezed together, his brows crashing together. You could feel his body tense under you.

"I don't know," he finally got out. "I-I— I don't know what—"

You brought your hand up to cup his cheek reassuringly. Slowly, he opened his eyes, and your thumb rubbed his cheek gently. 

"Tell me," you whispered. "Tell me, baby."

Heeseung gulped. He felt like he'd melt under your gaze, but the way you were so gentle encouraged him. Heeseung kept his eyes glued on the floor, because if he even dared to look you in the eye he'd turn to stone.

He took a deep breath. He'd tell you how you made him feel. It shouldn't be too hard, right?

But the moment that he opened his mouth, his brain turned to mush.

"I want to— I just— I don't know—" he stammered— "I wish I could— You know— It's hard to say, and—"

And if it wasn't for the way you stifled a giggle, Heeseung thought he would've gone on like this for another ten minutes. 

The moment that Heeseung realized you were smiling at his struggle, he shut his mouth, letting out a groan. He threw his head back, bringing his hands up to shove his face in.

"Shut up," he groaned. This was so embarrassing. He could feel heat prickling on his skin. His face was so hot that he thought he'd explode. "Shutupshutupshutup!"

You giggled again, this time using both your hands to cup his face. 

Despite your cool, nonchalant exterior, you were giggling and kicking your feet on the inside. 

"You're—" you breathed— "You're such a fucking loser."

Heeseung was about to tell you to shut up again, but you cut him off.

"Can I kiss you?"

You relished in the way his eyes widened, probably the widest that you've ever seen them. So cute.

"P-Please."

And with that, you smashed your lips against his. 

Poor boy, he was completely frozen at first. But as you swiped your tongue over his bottom lip, you relished in the way that he let out a gasp, giving you just enough room to slip your tongue inside his mouth. You explored his mouth— every corner and every crevice was meant for you to corrupt. 

You could feel his hands fall down at his sides. Of course, a loser like Heeseung wouldn't know where to put them. As you taste his lips, you guided his hands to your thighs. He gasped again, and you took this as an opportunity to deepen the kiss. As you did, Heeseung squeezed your thighs, letting out a whine.

Finally, you pulled away.

The two of you stared at each other, both breathless with swollen lips.

And as you caught your breath, you breathed, "I like you."

Maybe he would've been too stunned to speak after a kiss like that, but your words a loud "Huh?!" spill from his lips.

You grasped his chin, pulling him in again. 

"I like you," you murmured against his lips, your eyes lidded.

Heeseung's breath hitched. "I—"

"Was that what you were going to say?" you said slyly, unwilling to hide your teasing tone. A whimper came from him. "Did I beat you to it?"

You ghosted your lips over his teasingly, loving the way that Heeseung leaned forward a little bit, whining as you pulled away just enough for him to miss you.

"Just—" he murmured, "Just kiss me already."

"Gladly."

And with that, your lips crashed together. This time, Heeseung's lips were moving, too. He was a clumsy kisser, someone who had no fucking idea what he was doing. But that made the kiss even better. You've kissed many boys, but for some reason Heeseung was the best kisser you've had. You could taste him.

"Such a fucking loser," you murmured. You felt his hands slide up your waist, squeezing you.

"Yeah," Heeseung mumbled against your lips, and although his words were muffled, his voice drove you crazy. "Yourfucking loser."

Immediately you pulled away.

You looked at Heeseung, and he looked at you.

.

.

.

You bursted out laughing, and so did he.

"God, you're so cheesy!"

"Shut up!"

BONUS

You rested your cheek on Heeseung's shoulder, watching as he typed away. After all this, the two of you still needed to fulfill your plan: fuck with Mr. Dick Pic.

"What are you going to say?" you asked, nuzzling your face into Heeseung's neck. You admired the purple-pink marks littering his skin, the ones that you left. Your lipstick marks smudged when you and Heeseung were making out earlier, so you had to redo them. It was hard, because all Heeseung could do was giggle like a little girl.

"Trust me, I'll cook something up."

And cook he did.

[name]: she's busy bro

[name]: [photo]

The first photo he sent was the candid one of you.

You waited a few seconds, and Mr. Dick Pic immediately opened the message.

Heeseung hid your phone from you, so you couldn't see the guy's response.

But what you could see was how he furiously typed away.

You thought it was funny at first... until Heeseung was typing paragraphs and paragraphs so loud that you could hear his fingers tapping the scream.

"Hold on, babe, I'm fighting this guy!"

"Just block him...!"

Some things never changed.

---

Oh I need him real bad

The Doll House | Drabble: Kill for You

demon/doll!heeseung x fem!reader warnings: smut (mdni), unprotected sex, creampie, no prep, handcuffs, blood kink, biting, death, gore, blood, knife, not-proofread, anything else lmk wc: 4.3k synopsis: when you wake up in hell handcuffed and scared, there is only one prince of hell that can save you a/n: based off this ask! this is just something quick i did and isn't my best but i have so many people asking for more tdh drabbles that i though i would cave <3 this one is not as bad as i think it is but there is a lot of blood and heeseung rips a man apart so...be warned. reblogs, likes, feedback, and comments are all welcome! (this could also be read as a stand alone?? idk)

the doll house masterlist

Your eyes flutter open, the lids heavy and sticky as if glued together. The throbbing in your head is relentless, a pounding pain that seems to echo in the very marrow of your bones. Your mouth is dry, parched as if you've been wandering in a desert, and the air is stifling, thick with a heat that makes it hard to breathe. The oppressive warmth is suffocating, pressing down on you with an intensity that speaks of more than just physical discomfort - it feels like the very essence of torment.

You try to lift a hand to your aching head, but your arm refuses to move. Panic sets in as you realise your wrists are restrained, bound by cold, unyielding metal. The sound of chains rattling echoes through the dimly lit room, a harsh realisation of your imprisonment. Your eyes dart upwards, following the chain to where your wrists are shackled to a pole above your head. The cuffs dig into your skin, a painful nip that serves as a concluding punctuation to your negative thoughts - somehow you’ve been kidnapped.

The heat is overwhelming, a furnace-like blaze that sears your skin and fills your lungs with each laboured breath. The air is thick with the acrid stench of sulphur and burning flesh, a scent that is all too familiar, a contrast between the land of the living and this infernal abyss floods back to you with terrifying clarity. You've been here before.

This is Hell.

The memory of past encounters with demons and the stark Your heart races, pounding against your ribcage as adrenaline surges through your veins. Each time you have been dragged to hell it has been at the hands of Heeseung, to show you his world or try and entice you into making a deal. Yet, he has never gone as far as this.

Every cell in your body screams for release, for salvation from this nightmarish reality. The heat seems to amplify your fear, each beat of your heart a desperate cry for help.

Suddenly, you hear footsteps approaching, each one a heavy thud that reverberates through the chamber. The temperature seems to rise even further, if that's possible, and the smell intensifies, a rancid mix of decay and coal. The sound sends a new wave of dread coursing through you. You strain against your bonds, but the metal holds firm, cutting into your flesh.

“Heeseung, I swear this isn’t funny!” you shout as you hear him approach, ensuring your discontentment with his actions is conveyed.

The door creaks open, and in the dim light, a hulking silhouette appears. Much to your surprise and heartache, it isn’t Heeseung who strides through the doorway but rather someone else, a demon you presume, his eyes glowing with a malevolent light. His gaze locks onto you, burning with an intensity that matches the inferno around you. He moves closer, each step a reminder of your vulnerability, each moment a testament to your peril.

"Heeseung? Is that what he’s going by now?" The demon speaks with an uninterested sigh, his voice dripping with disdain.

The demon strides towards you in a lazy, almost leisurely manner, as though he has all the time in the world. With you locked up here, chained to a rusty pole, he might just have an eternity. Despite the terror gripping your heart, you can’t help but notice his appearance. The sight is far from unpleasant; his chiselled abs and defined v-line momentarily distract you. It’s a poor excuse, but in the face of such danger, you’re just a girl.

He stops before you, towering over your bound form, his presence overwhelming. The heat radiating from his body adds to the already suffocating warmth of the room. You can feel the tension in the air, a palpable mix of fear and fascination. The demon’s handsome features contrast starkly with the darkness of his intentions, a cruel reminder of your predicament.

"I do forget how easily impressed you humans are," he smirks, rubbing a hand over his toned stomach. "Do you like what you see? I wore it just for you."

You shudder at his words but can’t help a small, begrudging gratitude that at least his current human appearance is more settling than the hideous creature you imagine lurks beneath. In scenarios like this, you must take the good with the bad.

"Who are you? What do you want with me?" The questions tumble out, driven by desperation. As far as you know, you’re insignificant to anyone but your two beautiful dolls back home.

The demon scoffs, rolling his eyes as he turns his back on you. "Don’t flatter yourself. You hold nothing of value to me," he chides, his tone dripping with scorn. He licks his lips, then twists his head to look over his shoulder, his eyes piercing into yours. "But you mean a lot to someone I need to speak with."

You scrunch your brows in confusion, his statement only adding more questions. It can’t be Jaeyun he needs to gain the attention of—no one knows about him or his should-be guardian ways. Sunghoon is just a soldier, and most people believe he’s still locked away in his cell. That leaves Jongseong or Heeseung.

The demon picks something up from a table in the room and drifts back over to you, his eyes an eerie shade of red wine. The object glints ominously in the dim light, and your heart skips a beat as you realise it’s a dagger, its blade sharp and cruel.

“You see,” he says, his voice soft yet menacing, “sometimes, to get someone’s attention, you need to send a message they can’t ignore.”

Your pulse quickens, panic bubbling up inside you. “Who do you need to speak with?” you ask, your voice trembling.

The demon chuckles darkly, tracing the blade of the dagger along your cheek, not cutting but letting the cold metal press against your skin. “Oh, you’ll see soon enough. Just know that your pain will be his torment.”

The cryptic words hang in the air, each one a dagger of its own, slicing through your hopes. The demon’s intentions are clear: you are a pawn in a game of unimaginable stakes, a tool to be used and discarded. And as the heat of the room continues to rise, your desperation grows, knowing that every passing moment draws you closer to a fate you can’t escape.

There is a nauseous feeling in your body, your chest heaving with the rapid beat of your heart as the demon brings the blade to your arm, pressing deep into your flesh. The sharp pain sears through you, and a scream rips from your throat, echoing through the hellish chamber. Blood wells up around the blade, trickling down your skin and staining the metal a dark crimson.

The demon watches with a twisted satisfaction, his eyes glinting with delight. But just as he seems ready to inflict more pain, the door swings open with a casual creak, and Heeseung strolls in, his presence commanding and nonchalant.

"Lay another mark on her, I dare you," Heeseung says, his voice calm but carrying a dangerous edge.

Heeseung’s words exhibit boredom as if your life isn’t on the line. Yet, you know him well enough now to recognise that the darting of his doll-like eyes from your face to your injury is enough to show you he cares; he wouldn’t be here otherwise.

Instinctively, your body tries to run to the comfort of Heeseung despite his unkindness to you in the past. Even if he has instilled fear in your body, manipulating and coaxing you to do things you wish never to speak of, he is still a place of solace, your body and soul drawn to him as though he were a magnetic field.

“I was wondering if you would show,” the demon smiles widely, a stark contrast to the sadistic pleasure he showed with you moments ago.

“I’m not here for you; I’m here for my girl,” Heeseung explains casually, shrugging his shoulders. Yet, you don’t miss the tensed fists just behind his back. It makes your heart skip a beat to know that somewhere in that non-existent heart of his, he cares and will try his best to get you out of this.

Amusingly nodding, the demon chuckles lowly. “I know, this pretty little thing was the only way to reach you. She calls and you answer, how cliché.”

Heeseung's gaze sharpens, his eyes narrowing as he steps forward, a slow and deliberate movement that radiates power. "You’ve had your fun. Now it’s over. Release her, and I might consider letting you leave here in one piece."

The demon’s smile falters for a moment, but he quickly recovers, trying to maintain his bravado. “And if I don’t? What then, Heeseung? Are you going to risk everything for this human?”

Heeseung’s eyes flash with a dangerous light. “You misunderstand the situation. It’s not a risk for me; it’s a certainty for you. Lay another mark on her, and you’ll find out exactly what happens when someone crosses me.”

The demon hesitates, the confidence draining from his face. He glances at you, bound and injured, and then back at Heeseung, weighing his options. The room grows unbearably tense, the oppressive heat pressing down on you like a physical weight. You’ll never complain about a sauna ever again.

The blood from your arm drips onto the floor with each passing moment, your eyes pleading with Heeseung to make all of this end as quickly as possible. A small smirk flashes on his face and disappears just as quickly, assuring you that he has a plan.

When the demon makes no move, Heeseung speaks up again, his voice deadly calm. “Tell me why you’ve called me here before I tear you apart.”

The demon sneers, trying to muster some of his lost bravado. "You've been so busy playing dolls that you’ve forgotten you have an army to run."

Heeseung’s eyes flash with anger, his smirk turning cold and dangerous. "So you put my love in danger because I'm not holding your hand? Are you all that fucking incompetent that you can't do your job?"

My love. You’re eyes widen slightly at the endearing term. There is a part of you that wonders if he means it, if the phrase that rolled so easily off his tongue was heartfelt or just another branch to add to his plotting plan. Hearing your heartbeat fasten with fear and adoration, Heeseung knows you registered his words and yet he doesn’t care.

“We are doing our job yet you’re fucking around with angels and bitches like her,” the man spits, holding the knife with determination. Any second now, the blade could be pierced into one of your main arteries, rendering you dead in a matter of minutes as you stay hanging helplessly against the pole.

“Call her that again. I dare you,” Heeseung snarls, walking closer to the man. His actions strike fear into you because what if one more footstep is the difference between life and death for you? 

As the demon goes to speak once again, his jaw locks and his tongue pulses as though he is choking. He suddenly drops the knife, much to your relief, clinging to his throat as if that will somehow allow much-needed oxygen to pass into his lungs.

Heeseung’s eyes flash a vibrant red, an innocent grin working its way across his cheeks. “What’s wrong? Can’t speak?” The feigned concern in his words makes your body crawl, his sinister actions unsettling you, even as a secret part of you loves it.

Perhaps it’s the fact that after this, you’ll be clear of danger and you can get out of this. Another part is pure vengeance. In hell, you feel the sins inside you heighten: lust, greed, wrath, you name it. Every bad part of you calls to be released.

Suddenly, Heeseung lunges forward, gripping the demon's throat as his fingers sink in with force until the man's face begins to turn blue. The pressure is immense, veins bulging as the demon struggles for air, his eyes wide with terror. Heeseung’s grip tightens even further, his nails piercing the skin, drawing dark, thick blood that oozes down the demon’s neck.

Heeseung’s fingers dig deeper, the demon’s gurgling attempts at speech becoming more desperate. Blood pours from the wounds, splattering onto the floor in gruesome pools. Heeseung’s grin widens, his eyes gleaming with sadistic pleasure. With a sudden, violent motion, he tears into the demon’s throat, his fingers piercing through flesh and muscle with a sickening squelch.

The demon’s eyes roll back, his body convulsing as Heeseung's grip tightens further. With a final, brutal yank, Heeseung rips the throat from the demon's body, the detached flesh dangling grotesquely from his hand. Blood sprays in an arc, coating the floor, walls, and over you and the Prince of hell, the metallic scent mixing with the sulphurous air.

The demon’s body collapses to the ground, twitching and spasming as it rapidly loses the battle for life. Heeseung casually tosses the mangled throat aside, wiping his bloodied hands on his trousers with a look of disdain. But he isn’t finished. Heeseung’s eyes glow with a fierce intensity as he crouches over the still-twitching body. With merciless precision, he plunges his hand into the demon's chest, feeling around for the pulsating heart. The demon’s mouth opens in a silent scream, his body arching in agony.

“You’re a fool to pick a human suit, this is too easy,” he laughs, staring crazily into your attacker's eyes.

Closing his fingers around the heart and with a feral growl, Heeseung bursts the main organ before he rips it from the chest cavity. Blood gushes out in torrents, the heart still beating weakly in Heeseung’s grip. He holds it aloft for a moment, his expression one of savage triumph, before crushing it in his hand, the remnants of the heart splatter onto the floor, a macabre testament to his power and strength.

Never bring a knife to a demon fight.

Lying lifeless, a broken, bloody shell of himself, the demon remains still, finally moving on from the pain. Heeseung stands, wiping his hand on the demon’s clothes with an air of finality, his lips upcurled in disgust. It’s been a while since he got his hands dirty but he has to set an example to the other soldiers of his legions. If he starts getting soft now, they’ll eventually overrun him. 

Turning back to you, Heeseung’s expression softens slightly, though the remnants of his violent act still linger in his eyes. “What the fuck happened, Y/N?” he asks annoyed, as if you were the one that asked for any of this to happen.

“I-I don’t know, just please get me out of here,” you stutter, your mind still trying to process the nightmare it just witnessed. Watching a man be brutally torn apart before your eyes has left you shaken to the core.

Sighing softly, Heeseung’s gaze sweeps over your body, his attention fixed on the wound on your arm. With careful deliberation, he reaches out and gently takes hold of your arm, his face drawing nearer to inspect the injury.

His touch is surprisingly gentle, contrasting sharply with the violence you’ve just witnessed. The warmth of his hand against your skin feels oddly comforting, a reassuring anchor in the midst of chaos. Heeseung’s expression softens, a flicker of concern crossing his features as he examines the wound.

“I’ll take care of this,” he murmurs, his voice a soothing contrast to the lingering tension in the air. He leans in closer, his breath warm against your skin as he carefully inspects the cut.

What you don’t expect is for his tongue to run over the slit, collecting the blood that streams from it. At first, your face is horrified, the ministration causing your stomach to churn, yet, as he laps up your wound, you feel relief, his muscle easing the sting and allowing your arm to relax, even if only slightly.

Heeseung is engrossed in the taste, the sweet metallic now overpowering all of his senses, and the sensory overload rushes directly to his cock. His member twitches in his pants as it begs to be released, Heeseung’s arousal flowing through his body, so much so that between each healing lick he is moaning out profanities.

Your body gets hot as you hear him get off over the taste of your crimson nectar. There is a first for everything but you never thought one day you would be in hell, handcuffed to a pole, and have Beelzebub exploring his blood kink right in front of you.

“You taste so good, Baby,” he whispers, his attention finally drawing from your arm to your face. 

It is at this moment that he sees the perfect opportunity. You, who are so determined to never lay with Heeseung again, refusing to cheat on your precious puppies, are all tied up and in the perfect position. 

Once you catch that desire-driven look on his face, you squirm slightly, attempting to free yourself from the restraints. But what Heeseung interprets as defiance is actually reciprocation. There's an undeniable thrill in seeing him defend you, dismantle your tormentor with a ferocity that leaves him splattered in blood - it makes you ache with need, your pussy crying in lust. You yearn to break free from these confines and throw yourself at him.

"You're so vulnerable, darling. What if I hadn't answered your calls?" he murmurs, his crimson-stained hands already unfastening the buttons of your jeans. You whimper as his fingers hover tantalisingly close to where you crave his touch. “You were screaming for me earlier, do you think you could do it again?”

His question is loaded, a subtle way to ask for your consent. He wants to make sure as much as he would love to just ravage you right here without a care in the world, he understands - even as a prince of hell - that he would be no better than the dead demon beside you if he took what he wanted without asking.

Swallowing your guilt and pride, you nod, finally giving in to him after months of cat and mouse. “I’ll scream hell down,” you whisper, keeping an intense stare on him.

It’s all the go-ahead he needs before he’s yanking down your Levis and panties, leaving you bare on your bottom half. Hurriedly, the prince frees his cock, stroking it a few times. “You can take it with no prep, right, sweetheart? Or are those dolls not fucking you good enough.”

You whimper in protest, the biting metal against your skin almost painful as your body yearns to be close to his, rattling them harshly as you try to break free. The mention of your lovers goes unheard as you disregard what he's saying and any guilt you should feel. Lust and impatience pulse through your veins, overwhelming all other emotions.

His bloody hands grip your thighs, harshly guiding your legs to wrap around him as he puppeteers you into place. Despite your lack of words, Heeseung takes your mewls of need as the go-ahead to delve in without working you open. Truthfully, Heeseung’s cock is a lot bigger than Jaeyun’s or Sunghoon’s, so prepping you would have been a great thing to ask for, but as your cunt leaks onto his stiff shaft, you know as well as he does that there is no time to be wasted, both of you craving this as much as the other.

With one harsh thrust, he plummets into you, the stretch from his girth both agonising and pleasurable. The pain heightens your experience, his cock bottoming inside you, eliciting a half-moan, half-shriek. You hate to admit it but you missed his cock and how you can feel the veins drag along your walls.

“Fuck, you’re so tight, baby. Are they really not fucking you?” he lefts out a sharp laugh before moving his hips in a steady rhythm. “You needed my cock, didn’t you?” 

Responding with fervent affirmations of "yes," your knuckles turn white as you clench your fists, yearning to touch him, feeling his smooth, doll skin yield beneath your nails. You needed his cock more than anything, all those times of pushing him away and deflecting your desires, this was a long time coming.

He grips your hips tightly as you hang there helplessly, eyes rolling to the back of your head as he finds a harsh pace that sends butterflies in your stomach. He missed being inside of you, feeling how your walls hug him tight as your body overcomes with bliss. 

Suddenly, his lips meld with yours, causing his rhythm to momentarily falter until he adjusts, finding the perfect angle to hammer into you. Heeseung's tongue slips between your lips, and you taste him on your tongue, your saliva wetting his mouth as your bodies move together in an urgent rhythm.

“Fuck, Heeseung!” you yelp, your lips retracting from him as he hits a soft spot inside of you, each punch of his tip now making you see stars. From that first night you spent together in the mansion all those months ago, you haven’t had the privilege to experience anything this otherworldly, Jaeyun and Sunghoon taking you to the moon but it pales in comparison to the galaxies that Heeseung promises you.

Smirking, he bucks his hips faster. “Scream it, sweetheart, tell me you’re mine,” he coaxes, his frantic eyes trained on your closed ones. He needs to hear you say it, even if only once.

However, once he realises that no words are falling from your lips, he takes his hand and wraps it around your neck, oh so similarly to how he did the demon. “Fucking say it or I’ll end you right now.”

The fear that washes over your being heightens your arousal, your walls collapsing slightly onto his member. It’s embarrassing how much degradation, pain, and fear turn you on. Despite the tiny part of your brain with a conscience screaming out to stop you, you yield, looking him in the eyes with your glossy ones. “Y-yours. I’m yours Heeseung- Fuck!”

His fingers wrap around your airways, his rhythmic thrusts growing more insistent as he whispers sweet nothings in your ear. “You're a good girl, so good for me,” his voice is barely audible over the crescendo of your moans. The world outside seems to fade away, replaced by the primal intensity of the moment. If hell didn't know you were lost in this passion before, it certainly does now.

The praises mixed with the pain of his grip bring you close to the edge along with each kiss from the tip of his cock to your cervix. Between the warmth of the room, the heat radiating from your body, and the lack if oxygen passing through your lungs, you feel yourself shutting down, every sense overwhelmed by the brutal fucking.

“I’m gonna-” you warn, pulling yourself up with whatever strength you can muster in an attempt to gain some control. Typically, your hands would be raking down your partner's back, grounding you as you come undone, however, the metal doesn’t provide the same comfort that you’re used to.

“Cum over my cock, sweetheart. Show me how good I make you feel,” he urges, chasing his own release as you start to milk his dick, drawing out the doll's cum with fervour. 

With one loud scream of his name, you release your essence over him, your hands that were once gripping the cuffs now go flaccid, letting the waves of your orgasm take over. Your mind is not in the space to warn you that doing so would hurt your wrists but like the masochist you are, the nips from the restraints only add a sadistic pleasure to your climax.

Your embrace entices Heeseung, guiding him towards climax as he releases deeply inside you, his grip around your throat tightening briefly before easing, letting you gasp for air. His hips maintain their rhythm, driving his essence into you as if intent on securing it forever.

"Take it all, sweetheart," he murmurs huskily against your neck, teasing your sensitive spot before nipping it firmly.

The sudden rush of sensations overwhelms you, pleasure mingling with the faint sting of his bite. Heeseung's movements grow more urgent, each thrust seeming to imprint his desire deeper within you. His whispered encouragements and the rhythmic sound of your bodies meeting fill the air, creating a symphony of passion.

With every surge, he drives deeper, claiming you completely in the throes of ecstasy. His touch, both tender and possessive, ignites a fire that burns through you, each moment building towards an inevitable crescendo of shared release.

As you both come down from your highs, the only sound in the room is your heavy breathing and squelching from your combined fluids as Heeseung thrusts a couple more times before slipping out of you. 

He admires his work; your worn-out body, the blood from the demon that has transferred onto your beautiful skin, and the cum dripping from your cunt and mixing with the chartreuse-covered floor. You’re a vision to him and if he was enamoured by you before, he’s just become dementedly obsessed.

Your eyes close and your legs go weak, losing their grip on his waist as you slowly begin to pass out. It’s not good for a human to be down in the pits of hell, not for as long as you have, thus, moving with a hint of urgency, Heeseung breaks your cuffs as though they were made of plastic and cradles your body against his.

“Shhh,” he whispers as he nuzzles his nose into your neck. Heeseung refuses to be vulnerable but you bring out a side of him that no one has ever been able to before. He wants to protect you, to worship you, to have you by his side at all times.

And he’ll be damned if this is the last time he has you.

---

oh wow (not in a bad way).

Retiring officially from this blog but I’ll leave my works up as an archive. Thank you for the years of support and love and my messages are always open! Love you guys

---

storyline unlike anything i’ve ever read before

Tragedy & Balance

god!lee heeseung x muse!reader [afab]

[prev | the pantheon series ]

genre: smut

concept: pushed to his limits, heeseung arrives at his brothers' pearly gates to take what is owed to him. he knows very well what this will involve, what his brothers will try so hard to keep, but he won't be so easily swayed. at least, he didn't think so.

it turns out there is something hidden in this palace that he wants more.

w/c: 13.9k

warning: god au, religious themes, religious imagery, fire imagery, in depth discussions of death, reincarnation & souls; sexually explicit content, god fucking, body worship, vaginal sex, multiple positions, *unprotected sex, coming inside

There is a change in the air, a heavy foreboding that causes Jungwon to sit up in his bed, the blankets pooling around his waist. His goddess stirs beside him, sitting up slowly at his side. He throws the blankets back, getting dressed as quickly as he can, knowing very well what comes. His goddess blinks her soft eyes at him, watching but not moving, confusion in her expression. Once dressed, Jungwon rushes back to her side, cupping her face in his hands. 

“Do not leave this room,” he tells her with nothing but urgency. She frowns, fear starting to bleed into her expression. “Promise me.”

“I promise, I will not leave this room,” she assures him and he kisses her gently on the forehead. He leaves her side, reluctant as ever, pushing his way past the curtain.

His feet take him down from his tower, to the ground of the palace, all but running for the front hall. He can hear the echo of his brothers’ feet, all of them quickly converging on the courtyard at the front of the palace, the gates that are usually closed. He knows that when he gets there, they will not be. He knows that by the time he reaches the courtyard, it will be far, far too late for any of them. 

When they all reach the courtyard, the gates are hanging open, sparking golden and creaking in the wind. Jungwon can feel his heart in his throat, the ominous sound of them and the darkening sky causing goosebumps to arise across his flesh. 

“Heeseung’s home,” Sunoo whispers at his side. 

Regrettably, they know they have to find him and face him. And find him they do, in the grand hall, surrounded by the opulence they’ve all come to know. He’s sitting on the edge of the fountain, watching it fall from the tall spout, rolling over the edges into the pool below. Jungwon takes the lead, approaching him in front of all of them, knowing well exactly who he’s come to see. Heeseung smirks as soon as Jungwon is close, slowly lifting his gaze from the sparkling pool of water. 

His brother hasn’t changed at all, Jungwon can’t help but think, from the knowing glint in his dark eyes to the sheen of his silver hair, constantly draped in black. For all that Jungwon is the one who sent him there, he hoped that one day Heeseung would understand his decision, but he never has. Instead he sits opposite him, all of them, as though they are his enemies. Jungwon never wanted that, but it’s far too late. 

“What brings you home?” Jungwon asks. 

“You know very well what brings me home,” Heeseung says, getting off the edge of the fountain to face them, straightening himself out. He stands toe to toe with his younger brother, but Jungwon won’t back down. Not this time. “After all this time, I thought we had an understanding,” Heeseung says, faux sympathy coating his tone as he tilts his head. “I took your punishment very well, all things considered. The least you could do is continue to uphold the agreement we made. I am in charge of the balance of this world and yet you act without thought. I thought better of you, brother.” 

“It was never without thought. You can’t honest think⁠—” 

“What I honestly think of you is irrelevant,” Heeseung cuts him off. He rolls his eyes as he walks around Jungwon. Jungwon sighs heavily, turning around to keep his brother in his line of sight. He wouldn’t dare to not. “What I honestly think of any of you is irrelevant when you’ve all been acting so rashly. Impulsivity doesn’t suit any of you,” he says, his eyes running over his other brothers. Sunghoon clenches his hands while Jongseong’s jaw sets. “Well, except maybe you, Jaeyun,” he adds. Jaeyun’s eyes blaze and Heeseung laughs softly, turning around to face Jungwon again. “You know why I’m here.” 

“I know. And I’m prepared to make a deal,” Jungwon informs him. Heeseung laughs again, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“A deal? A bunch of mortals is enough for the King of the Gods to make a deal with me? What have they been putting in your offerings?” Heeseung mocks him. Jungwon glares back at him. “If you think I’m willing to make a deal based solely on the lives of six mortals, you’d be wrong.” A confused crease appears in Jungwon’s brow and Heeseung scoffs, throwing his head back. “Oh, you’ve no idea the things our brothers have done for their goddesses.” He lowers his head with a pitying gaze. “This is what you get for letting them run so wild.” He steps closer. “If I had been king, this never would’ve happened.” 

“Mother didn’t want you king,” Jongseong spits and Heeseung leans away from Jungwon, pursing his lips. “You think we’re uncontrollable? Nothing would’ve stopped you, and you know it.” 

“Because this is what we all wanted, is it?” Heeseung says, whipping around to glare at him. “The chance to throw our entire existence into question because you couldn’t control yourself?” He steps towards Jongseong. “A whole village, promised to me, and instead you promised it to her! You swore their safety, and for what?!” His eyes glow with black flames as he glares at Jongseong. “There are souls rotting in my library that should be on the river and are not. The balance of our lives is completely thrown. Her life is hardly the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what I deserve!” 

“Well, you won’t be getting it,” Jungwon says, his voice calm. Heeseung sighs, closing his eyes. “Any of them.” 

“If you’d like, we could always fight you again,” Sunghoon says and Heeseung’s eyes open, sliding to him. “You know you won’t win.” 

“I didn’t come here to be thrown into the abyss. Again,” he deadpans. “I came for what I’m owed. And if I will not have it,” he turns back to Jungwon, “an equal exchange is required.” 

“And what, pray tell, is equal in exchange?” Jungwon asks. 

“Well, that’s hardly up to me,” Heeseung replies. “After all, I’m sure to the six of you, your goddesses are priceless and perfect. I can place whatever price I want on them and it still would not equal in your eyes. And you know so well how much I value an equal exchange,” he drawls, causing Jungwon’s eyes to narrow. “So, you decide.” He closes the distance between himself and his brother who calls himself King once more. “I’ll give you… 24 hours to make a deal with me? At the end of the next 24 hours, if you all are still incapable of coming to a decision, I guess I’ll just have to take what I am owed.” Jungwon clenches his jaw and Heeseung smirks. “Think on it, brother. You’re smart, I’m sure you’ll think of something.” 

Heeseung leaves the grand hall, pushing through his other brothers, in a flutter of black and silver. Jungwon stumbles back against the fountain, gripping the edge of it as soon as Heeseung has gone. As with every interaction with his brother, he could feel the power that came off of him in waves, draining him. Were it not for all six of them working together in tandem, they never would’ve chained him to the underworld.

“What will you do?” Jongseong asks immediately, stepping forward. “You cannot give into him.” 

“It’s hardly about giving in,” Sunoo points out, causing Jongseong to turn his attention to him, though reluctant as he is. “He’s right.” Jongseong huffs, looking away from the Sun God though Sunoo looks at Jungwon imploringly. “There are mortal lives that he is owed due to the deals we made. We changed the course of history by not handing them to him. If we wish to keep the balance, we have to give him something.” 

“Would you like to give him your goddess first?” Jaeyun quips, his tone clipped. Sunoo turns to him with glowing, white eyes, barely restraining himself. Jungwon walks forward, gently touching Sunoo’s chest and his brother’s eyes slowly die back down to their amber warmth but his expression doesn’t change, nor falter from Jaeyun. 

“We cannot fight amongst each other if we want to come up with a solution,” Jungwon points out, his gaze swinging from Sunoo to Jaeyun, who looks away from Jungwon’s pointed gaze.

“What solution do we have?” Riki speaks and they all turn to their softest spoken brother. “Sunoo and I both saved our loves from death, Sunghoon and Jongseong entire villages for theirs. You and Jaeyun might be the only ones who’s goddesses didn’t cost a soul to save. What could possibly match the weight of that? You know how Heeseung is,” Riki says. He walks forward towards Jungwon, staring at him with wide, worried eyes. Jungwon’s hand falls from Sunoo’s chest with a heavy sigh. “He will weigh them, he will not just take our word. Just any deal will not appease him.” Riki shifts uncomfortably. “Heeseung will want something of value.” 

“Of all the things, we’ve indebted ourselves to our eldest brother,” Sunghoon mutters, shaking his head. “A fate worse than death.” 

To say that Heeseung didn’t know this would be a lie. He knows very well that there are very few things in this world, godly or otherwise, that will carry enough weight for what he asks for. He knows it and is quite glad to play such a game with his brothers. He knows they will flounder for a solution that does not exist, they will look for a way to weasel their way out of this exchange, this deal he’s so graciously bestowed upon them, only to come up short. He knows it and he will take great pleasure in every moment that they struggle with their own hubris. They are too prideful to admit it and he will make them watch as he takes every single one of their goddesses from them. 

In the meantime, he has no other choice but to bide his time in the palace. He could return home, the shackle of it weighs on him, reminding him that he’s not welcome here, but he refuses to let this chance pass him by. He will be a constant reminder to his brothers for the next 24 hours that their options are slim to none to save the lives of their loved ones. 

Its opulence chokes him. He can barely stand it, the way they live in such luxury while he spends his days surrounded by the gray, rushing waters of the river, forced to sit on the other side of it, watching souls come close but hardly ever do they make landing. He’s been forced to watch from afar for too long, though maybe it truly is better this way. Now he’s unsuited to this, the thin air, the sparkling white and gold of the place, everything. It’s enough to make him sick. 

When he retreats to the gardens it’s simply because he can’t stand to look at the wide expanse of white and gold before him anymore. It’s blinding and horrible, truly he does not understand how they all manage to be surrounded by such eyesores as these.. The gardens extend before him, lush and warm, almost enough to give him joy. Still, when he touches the hedges, they shrink from his fingertips, wilting and turning brown. Somehow he can’t find it in himself to be surprised, instead taking his hand away, folding them behind his back to wander around blindly. 

It’s while he’s in the garden that he hears it. The sound of singing, coming from deep within the gardens. There is something about the call of the voice from inside that draws him in. While the gardens, trees and bushes and flowers, grow thicker around him he’s forced to try and push his way through to see what is hiding inside. Despite the way the flora scrapes against his hands, retreating from his deathly touch, he does not stop. It is like he can’t stop himself as the trees encroach on him, when he sees it. Sees you. 

The river that falls down to earth from these heights lies beside you, rushing with clear water, the sound of which accompanies your voice. Heeseung thinks briefly of how sad you sound, like agony, like tragedy. He leans against the tree beside him, once he has passed the threshold of cloying flowers and shrubs, hardly giving the wilt of the bark any mind as he watches you sing, your fingers dipping into the water beside you. You’re wearing clothes of cream, a crown of flowers on your head. If he didn’t know any better, he would think you one of the goddesses his brothers have fallen so desperately for but you cannot be. Surely, none of them would’ve let you out of their sight, much less a place where he can find you so alone. 

You stop singing slowly, sighing to yourself once your voice trickles to a stop. Heeseung pushes off from the tree to approach you, knowing he walks silently, like the death that he embodies. There is something about you, the way the light hits your profile, lashing casting shadows down your cheeks from your forlorn expression. You don’t see him coming, your eyes focused on the water below you, until he’s crouched beside you. Almost as if sensing you’re no longer alone, you turn towards him. Finding him right beside you, your breath catches, jerking away from him.

“Heeseung,” you gasp. You lean away from him, trying to put space between yourself and the God of Death but Heeseung is faster, wrapping an arm around your middle. 

“Leaving so soon. When I don’t even know your name,” he teases you, a sharp smile pulling at his lips. You swallow, gripping his shoulders to try and push him off of you. “You have such a lovely voice, my dear,” he insists, holding you tightly, his other hand landing on the edge of the riverbed, keeping you imprisoned in his touch. “What could I do but come to you? What a beautiful Muse you are,” he whispers salaciously. With all your strength, you push him off of you, throwing yourself backwards. 

You land in the grass, rolling over to try and get away. Amused by your actions, Heeseung isn’t so easily deterred, dragging you back by your ankle. You yelp, pulling all the way back to him until you’re pinned beneath his body. He forces you onto your back, staring down at you. 

“How rude,” he admonishes you softly. You whimper, trapped beneath the elder god. You are hardly a goddess, just a Muse. Though you might be godly, imbued with immortality and powers, It means nothing in the face of the God of Death. He knows you cannot fight him off, forcing you to relent to him, fingers fisted in the front of his shirts as you squirm beneath him. “I know I hardly come off as approachable but to run off so quickly,” he mocks you, brushing the backs of his fingers over your cheek.

“Let me go. Jaeyun will⁠—” 

“My brother is spineless and childish, he’ll do nothing,” Heeseung hisses to you, knowingly. “Tell me your name and I’ll let you go, my dear. It is the least I deserve after such a rude display.” 

“Y-Y/N,” you stutter out and Heeseung smiles. He gets off of you, allowing you the ability to slip out from beneath him. You crawl away from him, curling into yourself once there is a bit of space between the two of you. Heeseung rolls onto his back, propped up on his elbows, looking at you. You catch your breath, avoiding his piercing gaze. 

“Well, what’re you still doing here? Shouldn’t you be running?” Heeseung goads you, making his eyes flash black and menacing. You swallow roughly around the lump in your throat. “Unless you aren’t really that scared of me,” he teases you, reaching out towards you. His fingertips brush your ankle, causing you to flinch away. “Muses, all the same. Jaeyun has always adored you, hasn’t he?” Heeseung comments. His fingertips still just barely graze your skin though you daren’t meet his gaze. You don’t see the softness in his expression. “Before his goddess, that is. Perhaps he’s grown tired of you?” He questions, bringing his gaze up from your ankle. Though you still don’t meet his gaze, he sees the way your expression drops, despondent once more like how he found you. “Is that why you’re alone? You poor, neglected thing…” he coos with faux sympathy, crawling towards you. You shuffle back, away from him, trying to curl up tighter, away from his reaching fingers. 

“Stop!” You bark, “you don’t know what you’re talking about!” Heeseung stops, falling back. “What’re you even doing here?” You finally lift your gaze to look at him. “Shouldn’t you be away, beneath the Earth, handling the dead? Isn’t that where you belong?” You remark, tone acidic. Heeseung sighs, collapsing back into the grass. You don’t miss the way it wilts beneath him, turning yellow. You watch with a sort of morbid curiosity as the God before you doesn’t even seem to notice. 

“Such a sweet, pretty thing and yet you speak with such sharp words.” He turns his head towards you, his silver hair falling into his dark eyes. You swallow, struck by how handsome he is. All your life, yours and the other Muses, you’ve heard Jaeyun spin tales of his eldest brother, how ugly he is. Perhaps it was just in personality, because you see nothing but beauty in his face. His gaze meets yours steadily behind the curtain of his hair. “Where I belong is such a harsh thing to say to me, don’t you think?” 

“It’s where you were sent,” you remind him, though your tone isn’t as hard as it was previously. “Where your brothers imprisoned you.” 

“A great many eons ago,” he confirms. “But I’m more powerful than them. Their gates are not indestructible, I am more than capable of coming to see them. Not forever,” he lets his head fall back against the ground once more, staring back up towards the sky, “but for short whiles. I’m sorry that my brother managed to leave that out.” 

“What brings you here now?” You can’t help but wonders, your own curiosities getting the better of you.

“I am owed something,” Heeseung admits to you. You tilt your head, not understanding. Heeseung smiles and then turns to you again, but his smile is hardly kind. “Not that it’s any of your concern, Muse. The tragedy of my life is hardly something for you to worry your pretty self with.” He rolls over to climb to his feet and you flinch away from him as he stands, brushing himself off. “I meant what I said,” he tells you, looking down at you. “Your voice is very beautiful.” You can’t help but be struck by the way he says it, almost kindly.

“Thank you,” you whisper. He departs shortly, leaving you alone. You curl your legs even closer to yourself, wrapping your arms around them. You can’t help the way your eyes follow him as he walks out, slipping between the trees until he disappears from view. 

On the other side of the garden, Heeseung pauses. He leans back against the trees, listening out for your voice. It doesn’t return though it echoes through his mind. When he lets his head drop back against the tree, he smiles softly to himself. Perhaps, just maybe, he was a bit hasty in his convictions. 

24 hours is hardly any time at all, they all know this, and by the time Sunoo is forced to raise the sun in the morning again, they’ve all talked themselves to death. The knowledge of what comes weighs heavily on their minds, as they know Heeseung will make the decision for them. They won’t simply allow it, they’ll sooner throw Heeseung back to his abyss than let him simply think he can take whatever he wants, but they all knew that this price might come. Even if they deny him, he will demand something of great value if not the souls he’s unable to attain. 

The sun has risen above the horizon when Heeseung lets himself back into the grand hall, a grin upon his face. Never has Jongseong felt such a strong urge to throw his brother back into the abyss from whence he came than by that look of utter satisfaction that is written across his expression. He stands before Heeseung can get too close, blocking him from getting closer to Jungwon. 

“Oh, are we fighting already, Jongseong? I knew you might grow tired of me but so soon?” Heeseung mocks him. 

“Your greed will be your downfall,” Jongseong warns him. Heeseung laughs in amusement. 

“Greed? I have greed because you are the one who made an agreement without giving it thought. I’m greedy because I am fulfilling the role that which you so graciously bestowed upon me, by the way,” he points out, causing Jongseong’s expression to tighten, “all those eons ago. If you would like me to step down from weighing the souls of mortals so that someone else may do it, I would gladly, but they must be weighed.” Heeseung leans towards him, his expression turning dark. “Everything must be in balance. I believe you were the one who insisted upon it.” 

“Tell us what you want,” Jungwon says, hopeful to avoid bloodshed. Heeseung leans away from Jongseong, stepping around his seething brother to approach where Jungwon remains seated. “Surely you know that we have nothing to offer you.” Heeseung smirks, clearly having expected such an admission. His other brothers won’t even look at him. “So name your price. Just know that it will not be their souls.” 

“That is what I asked for,” Heeseung reminds him and Jungwon glares up at him. “Theirs and all the mortals that you made the mistake of letting live. Those souls are crowding my shelves, I haven’t the room for the mistakes you have allowed to happen,” he insists, leaning menacingly towards his brother. “Prepared to make a deal with me, little brother? You are hardly meant to be king.” 

“Would you like to be thrown back into the river once more?” Sunghoon says, jumping to his feet. Heeseung looks to him, lifting a brow. “We may have made our mistakes, but you are hardly the God Jungwon is. Mother insisted upon your disposal, you should thank him for your life.” 

“Thank him, for an eternity of solitude?” He says, straightening up to face Sunghoon. “Well, let me drop to my knees!” Heeseung snarls. “How dare I expect to be treated as equal with you, at the very least? Without me, this world would’ve destroyed itself already. You should be thanking me!” He demands, eyes blazing. 

“Make your choice,” Jungwon demands, getting to his feet. Heeseung turns back to him and Jungwon’s eyes crackle with lightning. “But know that it will not be them. You may take the souls you so desire if that is really what you want. Let it consume you, your need for balance, but you will not have the goddesses.”

The blazing fire in Heeseung’s eyes extinguishes and he smirks. 

“You will do anything. Truly, it is almost admirable. Almost… romantic,” he comments, and Jungwon’s eyes become brown once more, surprised by his eldest brother’s tone, his consideration. “Let me offer you a deal then, brother,” Heeseung says, smirking. Jungwon’s brow creases in confusion, shifting slightly away, concerned for what Heeseung might propose. “The weight of a few mortals is far from that of a goddesses’ soul and we all know it. Especially six of them. However, I might be amenable to an exchange of another goddess.” 

“Whom do you ask for?” Jungwon asks. 

“Y/N,” Heeseung says, a smile on his lips. “Tragedy.” 

“You are shameless!” Jaeyun insists, getting to his feet. Jungwon glances away though and Heeseung knows Jungwon is considering it. “To take a goddess for another is low, even for you, brother. What makes you think⁠—” 

“I think,” Heeseung cuts him off, cutting him a look, “that the price of a lesser goddess is well worth it to you. After all, how much attention do those Muses even get with your adoration of yours?” He mocks him and Jaeyun clenches his fists at his sides. “Offer me thanks, Jaeyun, I am taking one off of your hands. You will have so much more time to waste in the arms of your lover.” 

“Why you⁠—” Jaeyun says, stepping towards him. Sunoo pulls on his wrist to stop him from advancing further on Heeseung.

“I cannot give her to you outright,” Jungwon says and Heeseung’s gaze swings to him. “She is a goddess, her soul has never been bound to the Earth. She must give it to you of her own volition. You must get her to agree,” Jungwon warns him and Heeseung nods, accepting the terms. He knows very well, after all. “However, if you manage it, she will be yours. You may have her as recompense.” 

“Jungwon,” Riki hisses but Jungwon won’t meet any of their eyes. 

“I knew you could be reasonable, Jungwon,” Heeseung says with a grin. “After all, you’re saving so many souls this way,” he mocks him, Jungwon closing his eyes against the guilt that eats at him. Heeseung then turns to Jaeyun, who is still burning with rage. “Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of her.” He turns on his heel, leaving them. Only once he’s left the room does Sunoo finally let go of Jaeyun, who turns to Jungwon. 

“Do you know the things he might do to her?!” Jaeyun points out. “Heeseung will manipulate her, she will agree. Once she gives him her word, she’ll be trapped down there, his to own. How could you⁠—” 

“I did what I had to,” Jungwon finally says, voice soft. “I am hardly proud of it. So you best remember the choices we’ve been forced to make when you lie with your lovers tonight.” 

“It’s like you’ve not even left,” Heeseung says, startling you. You thought for sure that he would’ve left by now, but he edges through the trees and bushes to approach you, your eyes darting between him and the way the nature seems to shrink away from his touch, turning yellow and brown when he brushes against it only to turn green and lush once he passes it. It saddens you, though not for the reasons one might expect. Your eyes land on him when he gets to you, kneeling beside you on the ground. “Perhaps I’m just lucky.” 

“Why’re you still here?” You ask and he laughs softly. 

“Blunt, aren’t you?” Heeseung asks and you shrug, looking away from him, your fingertips dipped into the river. He leans towards you, almost touching you as he watches the river rush past your fingertips. “So strange,” he whispers and you resist the urge to jump at how close his voice is, “seeing water such as this. I’m not particularly familiar with water so clear you can see the bottom.” 

“The Sanzu must be very different to this,” you whisper and Heeseung’s eyes focus on you instead of the river. 

“It is,” he whispers. His hand touches your waist gently. He watches you shiver but you don’t look at him. “The waters are so deep and fast, nearly uncrossable in most places. I watch souls attempt to cross through its snake infested waters all the time. Watch as they’re dragged beneath the waves.” A chill creeps over your body. “But most are afforded the bridge. The ones that are allowed the ford, they are few and far between.” 

“Can a river like that truly have a ford?” You ask, turning to look at him. You jerk back, surprised to see him so close. 

“The Sanzu is unlike anything you’ve ever seen. Trust me, you’d be amazed by it,” Heeseung tells you, lifting his free hand to your cheek, tucking your hair behind your ear. “I think it’s rather unfortunate you’ve never seen it. Given that you are tragedy after all.” You hold your breath, trying to remain unaffected but he can see the surprise in your eyes. “Did you think I wouldn’t find out? There are so few who understand sadness and agony like me, after all. Maybe that’s why I was drawn to your voice,” his fingers brush over the roundness of your cheek. 

“What do you want?” You ask, trying to swallow down your fear. You know the whispers, what people say about Heeseung, that he is more than just a God of Death. He knows very well what he is, what kind of powers he possesses. It cannot be a coincidence that he might come back to you, speaking to you with such kindness. Not after he trapped you beneath him, forcing your compliance. 

“I should’ve figured you would see right through me,” Heeseung sighs. “I have a proposition for you, pretty. A deal that you might… be willing to take, if you’re as kind as I believe you to be.” You watch him and his eyes meet yours slowly. “You see, I was owed something, something that brought me here. That something was a few very precious souls that my brothers… well, they’d do just about anything to avoid giving them to me.” 

“Who do they belong to?” You whisper. 

“Their goddesses,” Heeseung tells you and your eyes widen in surprise. “Before they were brought here, they were just mortals. Simple, and unknowing. And I’m sure you’re well aware that souls of mortals belong to me. All of them.” You nod, hesitantly. “Well, I simply came to collect. Everyone dies, it’s my job to make sure of it.” 

“What does this have to do with me?” You ask. He smiles softly, cupping your cheek in hand. 

“My brothers and I came to an understanding regarding these souls, but you have to understand, everything comes with a price,” he tells you. “And this price, is you.” 

“Me?” You gasp. “Why me?” 

“Are you not tragedy, my dear?” Heeseung asks you, stroking his thumb over your cheek. “Are you not the one thing in this whole wretched world that might understand me?” He pulls you closer, pressing your chest against his, taking your breath with it. “Death is my life, and it’s such a terribly lonely existence. You understand, don’t you?” You look into his eyes, shrouded slightly by his silver hair, dark brown and staring so intently you feel as though you can feel it in your soul. “Surely you do. While the rest of the muses experience the joy of things like poetry and prose and song you continue to be cursed by the agony of it all. Happiness is but a fleeting dream when the only call you are allowed to answer is that of death and disaster.” 

Unfortunately, he’s right. You’ve never minded too much, but even you know that you’re far from Jaeyun’s favorite, from anyone’s favorite. You’ve always known you’re barely departed from the God of Death, drawn here to the heavens but brought down to earth to see the saddest parts of humanity. You’ve never been to the river but you’ve seen the souls that depart for it, never to be seen again. It haunts you, and you’re all the more lonely for it. 

Could Heeseung truly be just as so?

“Do you see?” He asks, words whispered to you. “The only thing I ask is you, in exchange for all the rest of them. You would be saving them, and me,” he coos. You look into his eyes, expression softened, almost pained. Your heart aches in sympathy and you touch his cheek gently. His eyes flutter softly when you touch him, leaning his head into your palm. Despite his godliness, he does not emanate warmth like the others, as human as the ones you’ve seen below. Truly he is othered by his brothers, he must be. 

“What would I have to do?” You ask and Heeseung smiles. He knew you wouldn’t refuse. 

“Give me your word,” he tells you. “And become mine.” 

“I will,” you agree. 

“I was so hoping you would understand,” he coos, bringing his hand down from your face to your chest. His fingers move aside the v of your neckline, revealing the center of your chest to him. You go to flinch back but he holds fast to your waist, not letting you move an inch. “Oh, no, pretty, you misunderstand,” he whispers. “You gave me your word. You belong to me.” His eyes blaze with black flames as his fingers touch your bare skin and you gasp through the pain that rips through you. 

It’s like you’ve been engulfed by flames, licking at your skin, melting you down to the bones. Your hand falls from his face to grip at his arms desperately as he smirks, watching your wide eyes stare into his. 

“Hurts,” you whisper, the only word you can get out through the unbearable pain and he coos again, but this time he mocks you with it. You feel as though you have never been more foolish in your immortal life. 

“I’m sure it does,” he hisses, staring intently into your eyes.

Your eyes roll back into your head, gasping through the pain that rocks through your body, agony like you’ve never felt it before. Your fingers dig into his forearms, your head thrown back as you try not to scream. Darkness starts to take over your vision as you succumb to the horrendous pain, collapsing in Heeseung’s arms. 

When you wake, you wake alone. You throw yourself upright in bed, the blankets of pitch black gathering around your waist as you gasp for air. The air is thick and heavy in your lungs, an ache in the middle of your chest making it hard for you to get a full breath in. You reach down for the front of your dress, pulling the folds of the fabric open to see what he’s done. With a trembling hand you touch the scarred words into your skin, his name burned into your flesh. 

Lee Heeseung is written across your skin, and you resist the urge to sob. You press your fingers against the smarting wounds, knowing there’s nothing else you can do. It’s too late. He’s taken you. 

When you finally drag yourself from the blankets, you stagger across the cold stone beneath your feet, trying to find your way out of the bedroom that you’re in. The furnishings are all made of wood and stone and decorated in black and silver. It’s dim, lit only by a few sconces on the walls, kerosene lamps lighting your way. You try to get out as quickly as you can, pushing your way out the sliding wood door, stumbling into the hallway. 

Wherever you are, it’s freezing cold, the thin dress you wear far from enough to keep you warm. You have to wrap your arms around yourself as you walk down the cavernous halls, high ceilings of gray stone above your head, the walls all lined with kerosene lamps. It’s dim, the air heavy as you try to make your way towards something. Towards anything at all, just to figure out where you are. 

Every door you try to open is locked, refusing to budge even when you pull on their flimsy, wooden frames. You try every door along the long hallway, hopeful to find someone, anyone who might be able to help you. You know you belong to Heeseung but you can’t stand the idea of it, being left alone in his room, helpless. You just keep trying doors, desperately hoping someone might be inside one of them or, at the very least, one of them will be open so that you can hide from him in peace. 

You get to the end of the hall, only to realize that you’re at the end of the line. The walls of the hallway fall away and you’re standing at the edge of a river, a great rushing river of gray water, running past you never-endingly. In both directions, the river stretches out so far it eventually turns into nothing but fog, extending out for what must be an eternity. You don’t need to be told what it is, you know what river you’re looking at. Before you, in the middle of the path, there is a bridge, arching upwards, a steep climb from where you stand. You try to catch your breath but the roaring water is too much, the air humid. You’re standing on unsteady legs, unfamiliar with the stone beneath your feet, which causes you to sway dangerously towards the edge of the river as you try to get a full breath in. 

A hand around your arm pulls you back, throwing you into the chest of the person that tugs you from the edge. You let go of yourself to touch the person that grabbed you, using them to stay upright. They let go of you as soon as you do though and you fall heavily to the stone flooring, right on your backside. When you lift your gaze, Heeseung is staring down at you. 

“Do you know what would’ve happened to you if you had fallen in?” He tells you, glaring down at you. “I never would’ve been able to get you out. Souls that fall into the river's waters don’t come out. Don’t get so close, even I can’t save you.” 

“Well, considering I woke up lost and alone, I don’t know what you expected!” You retort, getting back to your feet. Heeseung surveys you critically, watching you struggle to your feet. “Where have you even been? After all that nonsense you gave me at the palace⁠—” 

“I had to get you to agree somehow,” he interrupts you and you scoff, shaking your head. 

“I am a fool. I thought you had a heart, but clearly you’re as empty and hollow as Jaeyun has always said you are,” you accuse him, making Heeseung’s eyes blaze. “If the only thing you ever wanted in exchange for the others was my soul, then go on! Take it! It’s clearly the only thing you care about!” You insist, leaning towards him.

Heeseung’s fingers are suddenly pressing painfully into your chest, right above where his name has been written into your skin. He presses them in hard enough to ache, and it feels like something is stealing your breath right from you. Heeseung watches you with dark eyes full of black fire as you gasp for air, his fingers moving slowly up your chest, towards your throat. It’s choking you, something wet and thick rising up within you. Not your throat, not your windpipe, something deeper, intangible, as his index and middle fingers trace their way up your skin. 

It rises up your neck, until it’s in the back of your throat, your mouth, hot and wet and pulsing. Your hands wrap around your throat, still you can’t breathe until you’re forced to open your mouth as Heeseung’s fingers trace up underneath your jaw and chin. When it pours out of you, you’re shocked to see a glowing ball of liquid, silver like mercury floating between you above his fingers. 

“Silver. I expected gold,” Heeseung says. You still cannot breath, choking on nothing, like all the air has been sucked right out of your lungs. A bottle materializes out of thin air, which Heeseung pours the liquid into and then magicks a chain around. With a snap of his fingers, the bottle is hung around your throat and you can breathe again. You look down at the small bottle that hangs from your throat, lifting it gently in your fingertips. “You should be more careful with what you say,” he advises.

“What is this?” You ask, turning the bottle over in your fingertips. 

“Your soul,” Heeseung says and your eyes dart up to him. Your hand lets go of it, the bottle bouncing off your collarbones. “Did you forget who I am in such a short, short time period.” He leans towards you menacingly. “If you’d really like me to take it, I can. Oh, I can and I’ll pour it right into the river where it will never be seen again.” You stare at him through wide eyes, Heeseung smirking at you. “I’m showing you kindness by keeping you alive. Perhaps you should think about that.” 

“What about the others?” You ask. “You said my soul⁠—” 

“It will suffice,” Heeseung says boredly, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest. “For the souls that I desire, even one made of silver is worth plenty. Come with me, I’ll show you what you’re worth.” He tells you, turning to walk away. You hesitate, glancing back at the river. You stare at its gray, rushing waters, swallowing through the fear that threatens to rise through you like your soul previously did. You still ache, but you have no one else to be with other than him. When you look back over Heeseung is standing at the mouth of the hall, leaning against it with a raised brow. You walk over to follow him, Heeseung pushing off to lead you back into the cavern of the underworld. 

You discover you ran the wrong way when Heeseung leads you so far inside, past all the previous doors you tried to force open, until you pass the door of the bedroom you ran out of.  Strangely, it doesn’t look any different from the other doors that line the walls, small and unassuming. Not far past it the two of you end up at a pair of great, double doors. Heeseung pushes them open, stepping inside with confidence. You follow him, only to stop in the doorway. 

Before you is a great room of shelves, all of them lined with bottle upon bottle of liquids. Some of them shine with bright colors, glittery and beckoning, some of them dark, dull and swirling, but many are just gray. They look as though they carry the water of the river inside of them, swishing and churning inside of their bottles. The shelves go on for what feels like forever, rising up towards the high ceiling, wrapping around the massive room. Heeseung pays you no mind, moving to a table that sits in the middle of the massive room. Most of the flooring is draped with carpets and seating, couches and chairs, tables and sitting areas. But in the middle of it, there is a table, covered with a cloth of black that is trimmed in silver, a pewter scale sitting on it. 

“Don’t just stand in the doorway all day,” Heeseung says, moving around the bottles that are on the table already. You look over to him, noticing the way he separates them all into pairs. You walk over to him to watch him move, his brow creasing as though he’s working on a particularly difficult puzzle. You stand beside him, tilting your head as he finally picks two of them up. 

“What’re you doing?” You ask and Heeseung lifts one into your line of sight. It is gray, as most of them are, swirling inside of its bottle. 

“Mortal souls have weight,” Heeseung informs you and you nod in understanding. “Pay attention.” You nod again and he places one on one side of the scale. The scale drops and then he carefully places the second one, darker and duller than the other, onto the other side. The scale struggles to balance them, the darker of the two clearly heavier than the first. It weighs it down, leaving it uneven. “All things in balance,” Heeseung says, plucking the gray bottle from the scale and replacing it with another.

You watch as he readjusts, putting a different, equally as gray liquid filled bottle onto the scale. This time, the scale readjusts, and the two sides sit evenly with each other. Heeseung smiles to himself, picking them both up. You watch as he carelessly throws the both of them, your heart jumping into your throat. They shatter in midair, but nothing spills to the floor. It all seems to disappear from existence, both bottles gone before your very eyes. 

“What did you do that for?” You ask and Heeseung turns to you. 

“It was their time,” Heeseung tells you. “All the bottles that you see on this table, are well due for their death.” He nods to it and you look over to the way the table is absolutely littered with bottles. Every single one of them must represent a mortal soul. Which means…

“All of these bottles…” You begin, slowly turning to look at him, “are souls?” Heeseung nods in agreement. “So… the souls I’m worth…?” 

“They’re… still on their shelves,” Heeseung sighs, rolling his eyes. “Without indication of their time, I haven’t been able to take them down, but you see now, don’t you?” He asks and you tilt your head. He huffs at you. “Your worth, Muse. Your soul is well worth at least 20 or 30 of these simple mortals.” He gestures to the table as whole, which looks as though it’s holding at least that many. “Your soul would tip the scale. Everything in balance,” Heeseung reiterates. “That is what I do. That is my purpose.” 

“That is why you⁠…” you trail off but something occurs to you. “But I couldn’t possibly weigh the same as a full fledged goddess.” 

“No, you are inconsequential to the weight of a goddess. You will never measure up,” Heeseung sighs. “Unfortunately, I have no grasp of them anymore.” He turns around and you follow his gaze towards the back of the room. He walks towards it and you follow close behind, the case before you becoming clear as you get close enough. 

Inside of a glass case, there are bottles, sealed with golden wax on their stoppers, swirling, glittering and effervescent. You watch the colors of them swirl inside of their bottles. Gold, and navy, and red, and white, and blue and purple. Your breath catches when you realize what you are looking at. You turn to Heeseung but he is already looking at you. 

“I know not how it happened, but now every single one of my brothers is accompanied by a bottle.” A pair of gold bottles sits at the front but the rest of them are aligned with a bottle of the exact same matching color and shade. You watch them swirl and dance inside of their glass prisons, like the embodiment of joy. “I couldn’t have taken them if I tried,” he turns to look into the glass case with you. “It would’ve ruined everything. There is nothing in this world, in the entire cosmos, that would match the weight of their goddesses except for them.” 

“So you would’ve⁠—” 

“My brothers hate me,” Heeseung says, “but I still love them. I couldn’t take their lives even if I wanted to.” 

“Then why threaten them?” You ask. “Clearly, you couldn’t have them. Those goddesses aren’t yours to take. Why did you⁠—” 

“Why do they get to be happy?” Heeseung cuts you off, turning to you with a tense expression, his tone exploding out of him like he can barely hold it in. You jerk back, surprised. “Why do they get lovers while I’m left down here, alone? I may not have been able to kill them, but I have many empty rooms. Would I have taken them prisoner? Perhaps. Would I have found a way to keep them away from my brothers? Found a way to force my brothers to their knees just for what they crave most in the entire universe?” He shrugs. “Perhaps. After all they’ve done to me, would it have really been so bad?” 

“You’re… diabolical. Evil. And self centered and greedy and⁠—” 

“If you think you’re going to hurt my feelings, think again,” Heeseung tells you.  “There is not a thing under Sunoo’s shining rays that I have not been called by my very family.” He leans towards you. “I am not afraid of you, Muse. But don’t forget,” he tucks his finger under your chin, tilting your head up towards his. “When I could’ve taken them, I took you. I’m not truly as horrible as you think I am.” 

“Then why take me?” 

“Not everything I told you was a lie.” He leans back, letting his hand drop away from your face. “Now you’re more than welcome to stay, but there’s not much else to be seen,” Heeseung tells you. He walks back to his table, still strewn with bottles, carefully organizing them with gentle hands. “Also, every room is yours to choose from.” He waves a hand carelessly but you’re sure all the rooms in his large home have been unlocked. “Unless you can’t stand to depart from my bed,” he comments, looking at you from over his shoulder. You scoff, walking past him and out the doors. Heeseung waves a hand and you startle as the doors are suddenly slammed shut behind you. 

For all that Heeseung took you, you spend an inordinate amount of time alone. It’s almost as if you never left the heavens, the only difference being that instead of lush green gardens and sparkling marble towers, it’s nothing but desolate gray stone and cavernous rooms and ceilings. You may have your pick of rooms, but none of them are truly that welcoming. Nothing in this place seems to be much other than a means to an end, a resting place for Heeseung to lay his head and do his work. Everything else is far, far from what one might consider homey. 

You spend days wandering the halls, of which you discovered there are many, this lair seeming to be a gigantic labyrinthian maze the longer you walk around it. The doors you tried before are all unlocked, some of which belong to rooms while others lead deeper and deeper into this rockface you seem to be living on the edge of. You’re shocked when you can find your way back to the places you started, though you’re starting to think that’s the way of this place. What would Heeseung get by letting you get lost down here anyway? 

The main hall is the only place where you see him though, but hardly does he seem to be doing anything other than what he apparently busies himself with at all hours. If he’s not in his library of souls he’s in his bedroom, presumably resting, and vice versa. He hardly pays you any mind, even when he walks right past you, the drape of his black cloak fluttering around him as he walks around, always his mind on something it appears. 

You can understand what a lonely existence this must be, always being forced to do what is necessary of you, hardly ever having the time for anyone else. Not that it seems that anyone else seems to care about Heeseung, with the way he regards the world and its other Gods with such coldness. Even if you wanted to, you don’t know that you would know how to break through that icy exterior. 

But you find yourself lonely too, retreating to your bedroom most days, or sometimes the edge of the river. You can’t help but be curious about it, watching the gray waters rush past. You don’t see souls approach the stone landing you sit on, legs pulled up into your body, your knees against your chest. Even though you thought for sure that you must, at least one or two of them, none of them seem to be able to make it over the top of the bridge and to you. Strange, isn’t that the meaning of the bridge?

“What’re you doing?” Heeseung asks, finding you on one such day you find yourself thinking about it. You don’t look at him though you know he looks at you with thinly veiled disdain. He always does. 

“Aren’t souls supposed to cross the bridge?” You ask him. Heeseung sighs, looking over at where you’re staring at the wooden bridge before the two of you. “Why don’t they?” 

“Souls are on the bridge, but hardly ever do they actually cross it,” Heeseung informs you. You lift your gaze from the bridge to look at him. “The Sanzu is not a destination, it is a journey. Souls are supposed to make their way across it, it’s what they’re meant to do.” He looks down at you, into your wondering eyes. He tsks softly. “So little you understand. Are all gods like this?” He questions and you look away from him, embarrassed. “If my brothers are going to fill your heads with stories, the least they could do is get them right. Honestly…” 

“I know you don’t care for kindness, but would it really bring you so much harm to speak with any sort of understanding,” you admonish him, getting to your feet. Heeseung sighs at you yet again. “It’s no wonder your brothers can’t stand you when all you do is belittle them and act as though everyone is so beneath you. You may be powerful, but what use is the power you have when you’re forced to live a life of loneliness and solitude as a result of it?” Heeseung’s eyes don’t stray from yours and you scoff. You go to walk past him, but Heeseung grabs you by the wrist. 

“Do you want to see the bridge?” He asks and you stop in your tracks. “I can show it to you. But you must not let go of me. It’s the only thing I require.” 

“What would be the point?” You ask, glancing over your shoulder at him. Heeseung moves to your side, letting his hand slide down from your wrist to thread his fingers through yours instead.

“You want to know why souls don’t make it to the other side,” he says, standing at your side. Slowly you turn to face him, Heeseung lifting a brow at you. “Don’t you?” 

Rather reluctantly, you agree, and Heeseung pulls you over towards the bridge. The wooden bridge is hooked onto the stone landing, surrounded by the rushing of gray water. Heeseung steps onto it, guiding you along behind him. You hesitate at the edge though, staying on the stone. Heeseung is stopped when you remain immobile and looks back at you, expectantly. You look back at him, apprehensively. Heeseung huffs and stands at the end of the bridge, still holding onto your hand. 

“Don’t let go,” he tells you and you nod. You step onto the bridge behind him. 

The feeling of being on the bridge is immediate, reminding you that you’re stepping onto a literal liminal space. The boundary between the earth and the afterlife surrounds you and you grip even tighter to Heeseung’s hand, though he doesn’t seem as perturbed by it. Perhaps he’s just used to it, he’s not bothered by the crushing feeling of being somewhere he shouldn’t be. Then again, maybe this is where he was always supposed to be. After all, he is shackled to this afterlife, his brothers once threw him into the abyss beyond the river, forcing him to guard it. Maybe this is just who he is now. 

You walk alongside him for a long time, longer than you think is fathomable, the wooden planks and high railings of the bridge on either side of you your only company other than the god you cling to. You daren’t let go of him, not when that was the only thing he required of you. You clutch his hand like a child to their mothers, resisting the urge to lean into him. 

Eventually, you start to see them. Your eyes widen when you see people, half formed and beginning to fade out of existence. Heeseung glances at you and then walks right down the middle of the bridge, the souls surrounding you moving around the two of you. They don’t seem to be seeing you, however, walking forward almost trance-like, like it’s the only thing they know how to do. 

“These are the souls you wanted to see, aren’t they?” Heeseung says. He stops and turns to you, forcing you to do the same. “This is the middle of the bridge. We’ve already made it there. Once we cross this line, the souls will start to take on a more solid appearance. Some may even know their names or their families or some of their memories. The further we get from where we began, the more these souls will know of themselves.” 

“Is that why they never make it to the end?” You ask. 

“They’re not meant to,” Heeseung tells you. You stare at him in surprise. “Souls that make it across are souls that have expired. They’ll never be reborn again. Souls that don’t will be reborn. They’ll reincarnate, into another. Usually another person, if they’re on the bridge, but not always. Souls of exceptional depth and weight will be reborn as animals or insects, a way for them to lighten their load and try to become human again.” 

“So… almost all souls are reborn?” 

“Of course,” Heeseung tells you as though it’s obvious. “Why do you think it is so important that I maintain the balance?” 

It all starts to come together in your mind. Balanced souls are reborn, they are brought back around to the next life, and if they are not taken at their time, they cannot be reborn. Every soul must be weighed, they are taken in pairs. If they are not equal, they cannot be taken. His brothers… by making those deals… they completely threw the order of the world. So many souls that should’ve been taken, they are still walking. So many lives that should’ve been weighed and reborn, following the proper cycle of all things. You are the exchange, you cannot be killed, or reborn, you can be equal to souls that are both alive and dead. Everything must be in balance. 

“I could either have taken those lives, or I could’ve taken something that is the same. Do you see?” Heeseung asks and you look at him in wonder. “I’m not so cruel.” 

“Is death not cruel?” You ask. Heeseung’s expression softens. It’s both unimaginably sad and understanding. He touches your cheek gently. 

“Death might seem cruel, that is the state of things, but it is necessary,” he tells you. You blink up at him. “I didn’t understand either when my brothers forced me to do this, but I see now. As lonely as this existence is, I know that none of them could’ve been able to do this. I know that none of them would’ve been able to shoulder the weight of so much tragedy. Do I resent them for forcing it upon me? Of course I do. That does not mean I don’t see why it is necessary I do such a thing.” 

“Do you…” Heeseung tilts his head at you. “Your soul? What does it weigh?” 

“Nothing,” he tells you. “I can show you.” 

The world melts away around you, only for it to rebuild itself into the shape of the room you found yourself in when you first arrived. You’re shocked by the feeling of stone instead of wood beneath your feet. You look around in shock when you can feel the heat of his kerosene lamps, fending off the chill of the stone. Heeseung’s hand drops away from your face and his hand leaves yours as he steps away from you. 

He goes to a shelf along the wall, picking up a bottle. He brings it to you, holding it out to you. You look at it, shocked by what is inside. Or rather, what is not. 

Something gaseous and black swirls around inside, like it’s fighting to get out. You watch for a moment, then reach a hand out to touch it. Before you can, Heeseung lets go of it and you watch in horror as it falls, smashing to the floor. 

The glass shatters and then dissolves into nothing. Your eyes dart up to Heeseung’s face, watching a shiver rush through him, Heeseung trembling like a swift chill just ran down his spine. He meets your eyes again and smirks. 

“Neat trick, isn’t it?” He says and you stare at him in shock. He looks at the shelf once more and there it sits, like he never picked it up, black gas moving restlessly around inside of it. “I’ve tried to break it a great many times, but you see, it’s useless. I’m chained to his plane, this damned world. It doesn’t matter what I do, I can’t die. I’m not allowed.” 

“But what does it weigh?” 

“Nothing,” Heeseung sighs. He looks at you. “It weighs nothing at all. I assure you.” 

“Have you tried?” You ask and Heeseung’s brow creases. “Against something. Anything? Surely it has to weigh something. Surely⁠—” 

“Did you listen to a thing I’ve told you since you arrived here?” Heeseung asks, his tone going tight and angry. “All souls are to be taken in balance. Every one of them. If my soul was meant to be taken, that would mean it would have to weigh the same as another. I can’t die so it can’t be weighed against anything else. There is nothing that will match its weight.” 

“How can you be so sure?” You retort and Heeseung huffs, smirking at your naivety, rolling his eyes. “Have you tried everything? What about…” your eyes dart around in thought while Heeseung stares at you in thinly veiled amusement. You are dumber than he thought, he’s sure. He waits, watching as your eyes alight, meeting his eyes. “What about mine?” 

“Yours?” He laughs. “Your soul? You think a godly soul could ever align in weight with mine?” He goes back and picks his bottle up off the shelf again, smirking at you. “Let’s see then, shall we?” he asks, pushing past you and out into the hall. 

You follow after him, Heeseung leading you back to the library. He doesn’t pay any attention to the bottles on the table, standing behind the scale yet again. You move to his side, waiting to see but he doesn’t place his bottle down first. Instead, he reaches out and closes his fingers around the bottle tied around your neck, breaking the silver chain it hangs from. You gasp, but in his hands, your breath doesn’t stop. Heeseung smirks at you as the silver chain around it dissolves, leaving just the stoppered bottle. 

“Let’s see your weight, Muse,” he comments, extending his hand to drop it on the scale. It tips dramatically, the plate your soul is sitting on almost touching the table top. “As I suspected,” Heeseung says, still looking at you, not even having glanced at the scale. “The value of your soul is unimaginable. Mine, however,” he says, lifting his own, nearly empty and lighter than air, “is nothing at all.” 

He places it on the opposite plate and turns to look, fully expecting it to not move at all. He knows what he weighs, he’s weighed his soul more than he can even say, watching as the scale tips up and up and up, forcing his soul to rise above all else. There’s no way he could ever⁠—

“They’re even,” you say and Heeseung’s eyes widen in shock as the two plates come together, sitting at an even keel. His soul sinks down to sit evenly with yours, despite the impossibility of it all. His heart feels like it’s being squeezed in his chest, his breath tight, watching with bated breath as they finally stop bobbing up and down, beside one another. 

“No,” Heeseung whispers. “That’s impossible.” 

“Clearly not,” you speak and his head turns slowly to look at you. Surely you still don’t understand what this means because you look at him without shock, clearly thinking you have bested him. His heart is racing in his chest, his mind is spiraling, he can’t imagine it. He can’t, not after everything, all this time. This is a mistake, it has to be, but still he moves towards you. You let him even when his fingers curl around your cheek.

“What are you?” He whispers softly, vehemently, looking you up and down as though he’s seeing you for the first time. Apprehension begins to paint your expression as you see the wild look in his eyes as he tries to figure you out. “What, in the cosmos, could you possibly be?” His words come out almost reverent, his other hand coming up to touch you, but instead it hovers over the curves of your body, like he can’t fathom your very existence.

“I don’t… know what you mean,” you finally speak again and Heeseung’s gaze finally focuses on your face again. 

“You are so much more than a Muse,” he says, bringing his other hand up so that he may cradle your face between his hands. “You must be. You have to be.” You stare up at him, trying to read the wild look in his eyes, but it all disappears when they’re suddenly flaring to live with black flames. “Impossible,” he breathes. 

His mouth descends upon yours like a storm, like a wildfire, his mouth taking yours in a kiss so world stopping, mind numbing you’re forced to clutch his wrists to keep upright. Your legs feel like they’re going to give out underneath you. Heeseung kisses you like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do, letting go of your face just to wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you up against him. You’re forced to let go of his wrists, instead finding the sides of his neck, digging your fingers in when he forces his tongue further into your mouth, hands bunching up the fabric of your dress. 

You’re surprised when you’re suddenly being forced up against the edge of the table, Heeseung’s hands grabbing at your body, lifting you onto the edge of it. The entire table shakes, bottles clatter against one another as you’re perched on the edge of it. His hands run over your body as he kisses you breathless, tongue running over the insides of your mouth like he hopes to memorize it. His hands move from your waist to your back and back down, to your hips and your thighs. You gasp into his mouth, which he swallows, tongue pressing into the softness of your palate as he digs his fingers into your exposed thighs, parting your legs so he can step between them. He brings your legs around his waist so he can lift you from the table, into his arms. You flail against him, wrapping your arms around him lest you fall. From this angle, you can gain an upper hand, forcing his head back with your hands on his jaw, kissing down into his mouth. 

“Muse,” he moans into your mouth. It’s the most gorgeous sound, you don’t even mind the way he’s carrying you from the room, nearly stumbling into the wall when he’s moaning into your mouth. His hands are under your dress, feeling over your thighs and ass, blindly making his way to his bedroom with you clinging to him. You move your attention from his mouth to his neck, letting the blinding feeling of desire and need fill you. Heeseung moans fill your head as you mouth over his neck and jaw, burying your face into the crook of his neck. 

He all but throws you onto the bed when he finally makes it to the room, still staring at you with flaming, blackened eyes. You feel helplessly pinned beneath his gaze, watching as he looks at you with flushed skin, chest heaving, lifting a hand to rip his cloak from his shoulders. A burning feeling starts to begin in your chest as he climbs onto the bed, crawling towards you. You lift a hand to it, spread out on the bed beneath him, trying to find the origins of it but Heeseung already knows it. He gets on top of you, all but tearing your dress open so he can look, finding where his name has been written into your skin. You look down to see it burning and glowing black, Heeseung staring down at it with dilated pupils. 

“You can’t be,” he whispers but still his gaze lifts back to your face, open and surprised, eyes hazy with arousal. “You’re not mortal. You’ve never been mortal.” The words leave him like he can’t understand it.

“No, of course not,” you tell him but it doesn’t quell anything within him. If anything it makes him shake, unrestrained lust and desire surging through him. He pushes you down into the bed, hovering over the top of your body. You stare up at him, entranced by the look in his eyes. Somehow, you’re not scared, instead watching as his blackened eyes run over your form with something like adoration. 

“How have you been hiding from me this whole time?” He whispers. Heeseung’s hands run over your body with adoration. He struggles with the tie of your dress, all but tearing it the rest of the way open so you can finally be revealed to him. You flinch back from his rough movements but once your dress has been opening, revealing your body, his touch becomes soft. Scorching and burning and flaming over every inch of skin he touches, hot enough to hurt, fanning a flame inside of you you didn’t know was there. You throw your head back, overwhelmed by it all as Heeseung leans down to kiss your chest, mouthing over the words he put on your skin. “It could’ve been you. I could’ve been first,” he moans brokenly into your skin, bringing his hands to your waist to slide them beneath you, gathering you in his arms.

You don’t know what he means, but it doesn’t matter. Your thoughts all disappear as you arch your back into his touch, his mouth moving over your skin with a desperation, tongue and teeth and lips. His kisses travel over your collarbones and your chest, licking over your nipples, making you clench the bedding beneath you. Further down, Heeseung showers you with affection, over your breasts to your ribs and stomach and waist. You look down to see him caress you with his mouth like he can’t get enough of your body, like he never wants to stop touching you. 

Lying you out again, he moves further down, to your undergarments, which he hastily pulls down, your hips lifting to help him. You couldn’t imagine pushing him away. Heat melts through you, centering deep within your hips. Your undergarments are damp with your slick, dripping from you onto the bedding once he’s taken them from you. Heeseung doesn’t waste any time, parting your legs with gentle hands so he can get between them, letting his mouth run over your body once again. 

“I needed you so badly,” he moans into your skin, lips kissing your lower stomach, over your hips, down towards where you need him. You still can’t find it in yourself to touch him, worried that it might break whatever desperate lust filled spell is filling his head. He keeps going, skipping where you need him most so he can kiss over your thighs, mouthing and sucking and licking and biting at the skin inside. You whimper, hips kicking when he avoids you, your cunt clenching and unclenching around nothing. You look down at him, watching as Heeseung finally lifts his gaze from your body once he’s finished biting a dark mark into your thigh. He rests his cheek against the inside of your thigh, panting heavily as he looks up at you with nothing less than adoration in his eyes.

“You have no idea what you are, do you?” He asks and you shake your head. “You’re what I need. You’re my other half.” He interrupts himself just to needily kiss your skin. “And all this time, you’ve been hidden from me.” Barely can he say a single sentence without kissing your skin with a desperation that bleeds from him. “Another great punishment from the cosmos, from my very mother who swore that I was never meant to be born. You were kept from me.” He crawls up your body, hands all over you, mouth trailing all across your skin, only to take your face in his hands once he’s knelt between your legs. “But no longer.” He swears, kissing across your chest, your collarbones, like devotion, like worship. “I’ll have you as I was always meant to.” 

“Why do I not know?” You ask, tears building in your eyes with frustration. “I feel like I know nothing. I feel like I’ve never known anything at all.” You grab at him, fisting his shirts in your fingers. He lets you, looking at you with such softness you can’t stand it. “All this time, and I know nothing.” Heeseung brushes your tears away when they fall from your eyes. “Tell me you’re not lying,” you demand, pulling on him, forcing him closer. Your tone is tight, but it threatens to shatter like glass and Heeseung’s heart aches, listening to you beg for the truth. “Tell me you’re not lying to me. I couldn’t take it, after everything⁠—” You cut yourself off with a sob.

“I am not lying,” Heeseung assures you. “Of all the things in these cosmos, I would not lie about this. Please, you have to believe me.” His own eyes have softened, dark brown and pleading with you. “Every soul is weighed because every soul is only half of what they are. Every soul is forever seeking their other half, even us.” He sounds breathless as he says it, stroking your cheeks like you’re made of glass. The most precious thing he could ever touch. “Even Gods. You are mine.” He presses kisses to your tear streaked cheeks. “You are my other half, my beautiful Muse.” He kisses your lips again, sweet and deep and desperate. You pull him closer, trying to get him against you, but his clothes rub uncomfortably against your skin. When he parts, he speaks into your lips, “And now I will have you, as I have always meant to.” 

When he slips away from you, it’s to disrobe, his clothes peeling away from his gorgeous body. You watch from the bed as he strips them away, layers between your skin, until he’s able to move back to you, laying himself over you. His golden skin slides over yours, warm and sweet, his mouth making its way from your stomach to your chest as he drops down between your spread legs. His hands slide over your thighs to your hips and waist, gathering you in his arms once more. You wrap yours around him, finally allowing yourself to touch him, his lips caressing the burn of his name as he presses himself against your body. 

He brings you into his lap, your legs parted around his hips. Heeseung departs from your skin just so he can look down, taking a hand from your back so that he might spread you open from him. You moan as his fingers run over your slick folds, gathering the wetness that drips from you to spread it over himself. Already his cock is hard and leaking, but still he needs more. Heeseung moans, teasing himself with the slick of you, pressing forward to align himself with your entrance. You’re more than he could ever hope for, he wants to savor this. He wants to have you for the first time as long as possible. 

Your body aches for him as he carefully pushes himself inside of you. You lean forward to clutch him against you as you’re filled with him. You shift over his lap, all but straddling him, his hand leaving his cock to instead take you by the hip, dragging you down over him. Heeseung’s gasps and whimpers filter through your consciousness but it’s hard to focus on it when it feels like you’re being torn apart from the inside, fire and flames washing through you, a bone deep ache. 

“You feel so good,” Heeseung moans into your cheek, his hands gripping you so tightly it hurts. “Like you were made for me.” 

“I was,” you whisper into his ear, a shiver ripping through him.

His hands slide over your body, his lips pressing kisses to your shoulder and neck as he grips your ass, guiding you on top of him. Every stroke of him against your walls sends new, mind numbing, earth shattering waves of pleasure through you. You have to dig your fingers into his shoulders to keep yourself grounded to the reality of him, his body against yours, his hands on your body, to keep from floating away. Your eyes are constantly rolling, your body following his guidance so mindlessly, eating up every last ounce of pleasure he gives to you. 

“So good,” you whisper into his ear. “Heeseung, please,” you whimper, choking a moan from his lips. 

“Oh please,” he cries out. He forces you to move faster, building to a frantic pace, your hips meeting his with loud, wet slaps, your slick dripping out of you to stain his skin, dripping down between your bodies to the bedding. “Oh please, please,” he moans, head thrown back. You press your lips to his skin, kissing over the golden skin beneath you, watching as he trembles underneath you, wracked with pleasure like he’s never known before. “I need more,” he whimpers into your throat. “I need you.” 

You pull him with you, down towards the bed. He falls with you, your back hitting the bed. You’re trapped beneath his body, your legs parted around his hips, Heeseung leaning over the top of you. His cock slips deeper inside, forcing you to take him at a different angle. You choke out a strangled moan as Heeseung adjusts for you. He takes your thighs in hand, pressing them back against your stomach, leaning over the top of you, making you cry out for him. Your hands find his wrists, digging into them as he starts to fuck you slowly, rolling his hips down into the tight press of your body, your knees over his shoulders. He looks down at you through flaming irises, watching your expression grow hazy, your mouth open, your eyes staring into his, unfocused and hazy. 

“Like this?” He asks, going faster and faster. You throw your head back into the pillow as he takes you apart. His hands leave your thighs so he can take your hands in his, bringing them up beside your head, pinning you down with his hands on either side of your head. From this close, he can practically bend you in half watching from up close as you take him, over and over again, forced to experience every last mind breaking wave of pleasure that rushes through you. 

Your eyes are transfixed on his eyes, the way they’re turning pitch black, soaking up all the light in the room, spreading out to fill even sclera, turning deep and endless. You can’t tear your eyes away from him as it happens, heat rising up from deep within your pleasure, aching through you, licking out at your every nerve ending. The heavy pressure of him inside of you, the feeling of him filling you over and over again, you can feel it building inside of you, closer and closer to the precipice. 

“Heeseung,” you whimper, squeezing his hands in yours, your hips trying to buck up against his but unable to with the way he’s pressed you down into the bedding. “I- I-” 

“Give it to me,” he whispers. “Let me feel you. Like I was always meant to.” He watches you as something dark and all consuming builds inside of you, flaring through the words on your chest, rising up into your eyes. Black and flaming, reaching out through your pupils, swallowing your irises, into your sclera. “Yes, yes, yes,” Heeseung moans. “Yes, beautiful. Become mine.”

You cry out, head thrown back as it tears through you, your cunt spasming around his cock. Cum gushes out of you, dripping and adding to the mess between your bodies. Heeseung grips your hands, chasing the way you tighten around him, over and over and over until it breaks over him too. His eyes close, mouth falling open as he comes apart inside of you, filling you up. 

In the library, left alone on the scale, Heeseung’s bottle glitters. The gaseous form inside turns silver, sinking down to the bottom. The liquid inside swirls against the side of the glass, splashing and lashing and churning until it settles down, idling at the bottom of the bottle. A perfect match to your own. 

“Do you really think I could’ve been first?” You ask, lying in bed beside him once you’ve both cleaned up. You’re cradled against his chest, like he can’t imagine letting go of you. You rest your head on his chest, his arms wrapped around your waist, a hand rubbing up and down your side. Heeseung hums from above you, as though truly still thinking it over. 

“If things had been different, perhaps you would’ve,” Heeseung says. 

He knows well how different things could’ve been. He knows that his mother always resented him, feared him perhaps, for all the power he possessed. He was the one who killed their father, he was the one who helped form the Earth, he was the one who made the very first human. Heeseung’s always had power unlike anything else, and for that their mother feared that he might one day turn on all of them. It was with great fear and resentment for her eldest child that she turned to her other sons, begging them to stop him. He knows that, had their mother had her way, they would’ve killed him, but they didn’t. Instead Heeseung was thrown to the abyss beyond the river, chained to an eternity of doing what they feared he would’ve destroyed. Maintaining a careful balance. 

Their mother did everything in her power to destroy what Heeseung created, including humans. It killed her, what she did, trying to undo what her son had done. She unthreaded human souls, forcing them into two, doing what she thought was necessary to be sure that her son’s creations could never fulfill what she feared most. Dethrone the sons she loved so desperately. She tore herself apart to do it, hiding the truth from her six sons in the hope that they would never discover it. 

Truly, Heeseung knew this might happen. His brothers were built in his image, he knew they would never be whole on their own. He, though, he thought maybe he would be. His mother was more devious than he thought. She must’ve known otherwise for how else would you be a God if she had not purposefully hidden you from him?

“If things had been different, I wouldn’t have had to go to such lengths to find you. I would’ve… maybe I would’ve had you a long time ago.” He looks down at you and smiles gently. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, making you smile as well. “I would’ve torn the world apart for you if I knew they were hiding you from me,” he whispers into your skin. “You know this, don’t you?” 

“I know it,” you agree.

a/n: *the unprotected sex depicted is both purposeful and symbolic, engage in safe sex practices like condoms and contraceptives in real life. safe sex saves lives; i'm not crying, you're crying. honestly, i'm crying though, this was such an amazing, once-in-a-lifetime story to get to write and i'm so, so unbelievably happy with how it turned out and how it's ending. i hope you guys love as much as i do and thank you will never be enough to thank all of you for being so wonderful and kind and invested in this story as much as i was. i think it's so amazing, the pantheon is truly a one of a kind story. thank you so much for doing it with me. and so ends the pantheon.

perma. taglist: @ducksstolemybread @dr0wnme0ut @pockettwinzz @emi-en @lilyuwon @deobitifull @oddracha @skzenhalove @nyfwyeonjun @bunhoons @ministrawberrywithchocolate @heeshlove @nshmrarki @avaleyshin @zeeloveshee @nyxtwixx @enha-bie @manifestobackshot @onlyuyu @in-somnias-world @hoonmine

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finally got a chance to read!!! did not disappoint at all

see you again.

pairings! 𓇼 alpha friend! jay x omega female reader

genre! 𓇼 smut

wc! 𓇼 6.5k

warnings! alpha/beta/omega dynamics, implied pantry sniffing/tasting, spanking, biting, light blood, light spanking, oral (male and female receiving), bite marking, unsafe sex

this is the longest fic i’ve ever written omg?

it had been weeks since you felt this much abdominal pain, hunching over in your bathroom. you squinted at your bathroom counters, trying to recount the last time your heat showed up.

you didn’t have a mate, nor did you want one. having an inner omega wolf had enough of a stigma as is, and the moment you learnt you were one during your puberty ceremony at twelve, it had been a wrap for your self esteem.

ever since you found out, you’ve found most alpha men and women to be very overbearing with their personalities. they walked with their heads high and rightfully so, as they were treated the best in wolf hybrid hierarchy.

omegas were seen as the primary baby makers, omega men being the main targets for abuse though their abilities mirrored any other alpha or beta man.

you picked up your cellphone, swiping upwards on the screen for your keypad. you quickly punched in your password, swiping aimlessly to find your health app. another sharp pain runs through your stomach again, causing you to crouch fully, wind knocked out of your lungs.

“i swear to everyone i love—if this is my heat i’m jumping out of my fucking window.” you threatened out loud, your thumb hovering over the app. you pressed it with your eyes closed, taking a quick peak at the top of your screen for updates.

cycle tracking: your heat is expected to start in the next two days.

“fuck!” you yelled, dropping your phone to the ground as you held onto the counter for balance. “that fuckin alpha comes over today for this stupid shit we have to do for work.” you talk to yourself, trying to come up with a game plan.

you had a big set of files you needed to put together with your coworker, park jongseong. it was due the following monday, and time had been ticking for a while, but you didn’t care enough to work on it sooner.

jongseong—also known as jay—didn’t care enough to message you about it either.

that was, until this friday afternoon. hence why you’re up this early—though it wasn’t early at all—trying to figure out why your stomach was paining you this bad.

you didn’t truly know if jay was an alpha himself or not, but you had an inkling in the way he spoke to you.

anyone could be assertive, but alphas always found their way around words better than betas and omegas did.

while betas were seen as being very easy to read emotionally, they were pretty secluded. this trait had them usually confused with alphas, until someone smelt their scent.

omegas on the other hand were built to be open books. books that alphas could easily read and dissect without saying a word.

and that jay was; the reader of your book.

you and your other omega friends would vomit out information like it was nobodies business in the presence of alphas, and you found yourself digging your own grave a few times with jay. he was kind, always listening attentively without judgement. regardless, the moment he would move out of earshot, you’d beat yourself up about it, wondering why you had to tell him in utter detail about how terrible your last heat was.

and now he had to step into your small, one person apartment. not only step in, but also sit in, his sexy scent sticking to any and all furniture he touches.

you fall down to sit on your bum, weakness in your legs. “i’m so screwed.” you commented one last time, your phone pinging with a new text message.

you picked up the phone, your vision a little slower than usual, your heat coming in fast.

park jongseong:

hey

just reminding you i come over at 1pm

and im driving rn so don’t cancel cuz theres no chance

‘i’ve never been more screwed in my fucking life’ you think, huffing out once with an eye roll. ‘what time is it?’ you ask in your head, glancing up at the time on your lockscreen,

12:49

‘fuck!’ you exclaim, shooting up to stand, your left leg pulling you onto your right knee as you stood up as fast as you could. you almost pass out at the sudden movement, closing your eyes to catch balance.

your mouth was dry beyond belief, and your hands were clammy. once you opened your eyes, it was almost as if everything had a bokeh effect, only coming into frame seconds after each blink.

you were sick as hell. and now one of the most observant people you knew was gonna step into your house.

you picked your phone up to unlock it, using it as a clock as you set it on the bathroom counter again, closest to the shower, open to the clock app.

not only was jay observant, but you gave him all the information he needed for him to be observant.

you decided the best first course of action would be to take a quick shower, stripping your clothes off from the torso down. you ripped your t-shirt off, the fabric slightly sticking to you from the sweat on your back. you pulled your shorts down, stepping out of them with your right then left leg. you paused looking at your waist, dreading pulling your underwear down.

you knew they’d be covered in slick, but you hooked your thumbs in at the hips, pulling them down.

of course—as expected—they’re soaked.

your panties are lined with lightly viscous coating, shiny with a soft hint of your omega pheromones.

each wolf had their own natural scents, resembling different natural flowers. you smelt of lillies—the most popular scents to carry being either peony or lavender.

you never cared if you smelt better than the next omega anyways, because you always swore you’d never mate.

you firmly believed dildos were more than enough, and bumping clits with another wolf, whether alpha or omega was a lot more fun to you mentally.

maybe you said that to feel better about the fact that you were the only one in your friend group without one, but who could really tell?

you reached into your glass wall shower, pulling the door towards you with your left; your right hand reaching for the shower handle. you put the handle up and to the left for hot water, pulling away to pull your hair together to shove it into a shower cap, waiting for the water to heat up before stepping in.

you were terrible with time management, hence why jay was coming over to you instead of you meeting him.

you looked at your phone quickly, realizing how late it really was, so you quickly hurried, jumping in.

you washed as much slick off your inner thighs and out of your vagina as possible. ‘do i have liners?’ you questioned, remembering the low count you mentioned to yourself the last heat you had.

you kept washing your body regardless, chanting the word ‘liner’ in your head as a reminder, turning your back to the shower water, sighing at the feeling.

• • •

you hopped out of the shower the moment your stoped the water, feeling slick lightly ooze out of you relentlessly. you ripped open your cabinets with your wet right hand, left hand holding your towel around your body.

there’s one box, but it’s empty.

“what is my luck today?” you yelled, near tears. you usually kept empty boxes of important products on your kitchen counter or bedside table to remind you to buy more, but it obviously slipped you the last time.

you tapped your phone screen with a wet hand, noticing your phone still had some setting to auto lock after a few minutes.

1:06

you slammed your cabinet as you ran out of your bathroom, rushing to your dresser. you took out your favourite double lined underwear, and some baggy sweatpants. you dried yourself off quickly before running back to the bathroom to wipe up some excess slick with tissue paper before putting your underwear on. you ran back to your dresser, towel on floor as you picked out a sports bra and t-shirt—your stomach ache switching to your boobs.

you reached up to deal with your hair to feel your shower cap, ripping it off as you threw it down with your towel. you grabbed your bra to pull it on, hissing lightly at how hard your nipples were once the fabric hit them.

you then reached for your top to pull it up and over your head, pushing your arms through the short sleeves quickly. you heard a knock on your door, side eyeing your room door to your left. ‘no way that’s him.’ your inner dialog notes, picking up your towel and shower cap before you heard another ding on your phone.

you walked back to your bathroom, throwing your towel up and dropping your shower cap in the sink. you eyed your mess of clothes on the ground but grabbed your phone instead,

park jongseong:

bro open the dooorrrrr

please it’s cold and scary out here

pleak 🙏🏻

you couldn’t help but smile at his texts, always managing to make you laugh; even if it’s only a little. you texted back, holding the last message down as it opened to send a message, “cominggg!”.

you walked out of your bathroom, looking for your laptop as you left your room, heading for the door down your little hallway and to the right. you unlocked the door with your left hand before yanking it open.

his scent hit you like a ton of bricks. your eyes did the same blur effect from before, eyes hot as you scanned the room in embarrassed panic. your knees buckle lightly as you almost close the door on him, his left hand coming up to stop it.

“y/n?” he asks, forcing you to mask, standing up straight with a light shake of your head. “sorry, i’m just tired… come in.” you answer, stepping back as you let him in. jay ignores the obvious discomfort in your face before stepping in, workbag in his left hand. you push the door in before locking it, your right hand checking if it’s actually locked out of habit with a quick jerk to the doorknob.

he’s dressed in business casual, a well fitting black t-shirt with black slacks. his shoes are leather, designer sunglasses sitting mid nose bridge. his bangs are a little long, his haircut weeks old. your eyes practically swallow him whole, biting your bottom lip lightly. ‘was his ass always that tight?’ you ask as he kicks off his shoes to stand in his matching black socks.

he’s speaking to you—and you’d hear it if you could listen over your heartbeat.

he walks throughout your apartment, walking straight across the front door to sit at your couch. it shares a wall with your bathroom, across from your wifi tv. he plops down, legs spread as he rambles on, his right hand expressing everything as his other hand places his bag down on the small coffee table in front of him. he takes off his sunglasses, of course bringing the case for them with him in his bag.

you finally snap out of your dazed state, blinking twice. you’re confused, looking up to see jays eyeing the way you don’t respond.

“y/n?” he asks, his brows frowned. “yup!” you answer, looking around quickly before walking to your right from the front door to lean on the kitchen counter. you watch the way jay looks at his wrist watch on his left arm momentarily; ‘god he’s sexy’ you thought to yourself, watching the way he now scowls lightly as he looks back at you, sitting forward with his elbows on his knees.

“did you listen to anything i just said?” he asks, his tone harsh.

“yes! i was actually. what’s the issue?” you lie, attitude strong and defensive in response.

“i’d love to hear you recite to me everything i just said. give me a recap.” he rebuttals, facing you completely as he sits back, his right arm up on the back of the couch, arm touching the wall.

‘did he always have this gorgeous tan?’

you look around aimlessly, trying to see if you caught anything he had mentioned beforehand.

all you can remember is mentioning how he had a tight ass.

fuck.

“okay i didn’t, i’m sorry.” you admit defeat, jay rolling his eyes to the left as he looks away, facing the tv. his head slowly turns back to you as he looks you up and down lightly.

“if i’m honest, we’re already screwed for monday, but more specifically, you’re screwed.” he threatens, pulling his arm off the couch to reach into his bag to grab his macbook. “mr. de luca already doesn’t have you in his best graces.” he continues, opening his laptop as he pushes his case over.

“but i agreed to do this with you because i know you’re so good at everything you do, besides your time management.”

oh how sweet. you roll your eyes.

he leans on his knees again, putting himself in the same position he had before he chastised you for not listening. “so come sit down.” he finishes, his hands hanging between his legs as his elbows point outward. you move to walk over, but your upper inner thigh rubs against you underwear causing you to pause.

you’re soaked.

jay scolding you like you don’t have any common sense was enough for you to almost scream for him biologically, eyes shifting around as you tried to make up an excuse. “let me use the washroom first.” you answered, but jay stands at that, annoyed.

“you just came out of the shower, it’s been three minutes how could you possibly need to pee.” he interjects. your eyebrows frown at him, annoyed. “how do you—how the hell do you know if i need to pee or not, the fuck?” you jab, jay looking down momentarily.

“you’re right, i don’t know. but i’m not here forever and i have to leave at two. it’s now—“ he looks at his watch. “—one fourteen and we haven’t even tried to get into anything. i also admit, i was a little late,” he motions to himself with both hands “—but i can’t control traffic.” he ends, so you hope and pray he doesn’t smell you as you start to walk over.

“okay fine.” you mutter, jay sitting back down on the couch. you didn’t notice where he was sitting while looking from afar, but as you get closer you notice just how smack in the middle he is on the couch.

‘of course he’s gonna force me to squeeze beside him.’

you come closer regardless, plopping down beside him. his right knee is so close to your left with his positioning, legs are spread unnecessarily. annoyance paints your body language at first, but you calmly cross your left leg over your right for your own security.

you wondered if he could smell you, but you thought nothing of it.

you two start going over the plan for your spreadsheets, jay pulling up multiple tabs with information for you to print or jot down. every word that comes out of his mouth excite you for some reason, his smile sweet with each ending sentence or phrase. he smells amazing, his own natural scent like geranium flowers. his cologne isn’t bad either, complimenting his natural scent further.

• • •

after finishing about five rows of filing, jay slowly stands up, causing you to look up at him. “where’s your bathroom?” he asks, and you almost laugh at the comment. “oh but when i say i wanna use it, i can’t go?” you question, jay laughing.

“you’re an hour away from me drive wise!” he exclaims and you clap once in a laugh before pointing behind you. “it’s in my room.” you answer as he steps around the coffee table to avoid stepping over you.

he heads down your hall to your back right as you sat back in the couch, waiting. you could hear his footsteps, leaving you to wonder where your phone is while you wait. you look around a little aimlessly before looking to see if it’s on on your counter.

you can’t bother to get up and search for it, so you decide to sit on the couch waiting.

‘hopefully he doesn’t take too long—‘

your clothes.

you audibly gasped, shooting up in your seat. your head pounds at the sudden movement, body still relatively weak. you’re paralyzed with fear for a second, heart racing.

you can’t remember if you picked your clothes up off the floor or not.

you get up, turning to walk to your room. your left hand slaps on your bedroom door as you notice the bathroom light on, door still open.

‘there’s no way they’re off the ground if he’s still standing there.’

you could vomit the way you felt, stepping towards the door to see jay bent over your bathroom counter, breathing laboured.

“hey jay-“ “it’s fine.” he speaks in between clenched teeth, your eyes catching the way your clothes lay in the ground, the crotch of your panties face up.

they’re even glistening, to your disbelief.

you never noticed it before, but your aroma fills the room, heavy in the steamy air.

you practically hot-boxed your hot box smell everywhere. “i should’ve cleaned up.” you comment, hoping he wouldn’t speak on the scent and just ignore it.

but ignoring it was the last thing in jays head. he felt guilty for yelling at you earlier, shame written in his features. but he also felt guilty for how unbelievably hard he was, hoping you wouldn’t see it yourself.

his eyes were darker in colour, a slight shift in his mannerisms. he stood tall, avoiding eye contact with you.

his eyes were locked in his own reflection as he watched his features, clenching his jaw.

“i’m good…. we’re good.” he answered coldly, stepping towards you. you stepped back instinctively, letting him brush past you, your eyes almost prickling with tears as his back faced you. you went to touch his left arm to apologize, but he whips it away from you, turning to face you instead.

“please…don’t touch me.” he commented, his eyes harsh. “so you’re mad at me again?” you asked, your inner omega pained.

“no, i’m not. i’m just protecting the both of us.” he answered, your left hand pulling back momentarily.

“protecting the both of us from what?” you ask, accusatory. you step forward enough to touch his upper arm with your index finger, testing. “y/n, please.” he comments, his eyes closed in annoyance at your advances. his right hand comes up to grab your wrist, lighting tossing your hand off him.

“what are you gonna do? are you threatening me?” you ask, feeling overly sensitive about him acting so weird about your clothes. your face is stern, and he can practically taste the anger in your words.

“you think i’m threatening you?” he asks, pained slightly as his eyes reopen.

the colour of his irises are a deeper brown than you’d ever seen them as he turns towards you. “then what’s your issue with me?” you inquire, looking between both eyes for a sign of something other than anger.

“i’m still an alpha, y/n.” he answers, your tense facial expressions falling. your eyes scan his face and upper body, the heat radiating off his frame. “i could smell you the moment i stepped inside your house.” he concludes to your dismay.

“yet you still snapped at me.” you reply, jays left hands palm and fingers coming up to rub at his eyes. “i know. that’s why i feel so bad.” he answers, letting your wrist go as he rubs his face with both hands.

“what are you thinking so hard about?”, you ask, trying to access the situation.

“all of this.” he answers as time stands still, his hands dropping from his face.

“what about this?” you ask, pushing the envelope a little.

“okay, we’re not doing this.” he denies your advance, stepping back. you reach out for him regardless, your right hand tangled in his left shirt sleeve. you proceed yank him back, against your better judgement.

his chest hits yours temporarily, your mouth parting as you almost moan at the contact. “just answer my question.” you loop around, your hand letting his shirt go.

“the smell on your clothes was a lot,” he starts looking up in defeat as his right hands middle finger and thumb wipe his lips corners as he thinks of something to say.

strangely enough, you catch a whiff of yourself on his fingers as he drops his hand again, confusing you.

you look down at his hand briefly before looking back up as you step backwards, slowly turning for the bathroom.

he notices your suspicions, his left hand reaching out for you quickly as he grabs your upper right arm.

the eye contact between you too is strong as you rebound towards him at the force, your eyes scanning his body language.

you catch how unnecessarily tight his dress pants are, the way his breaths are calculated and timed.

“what’s wrong?” you playfully ask, a smirk creeping up your face. “i was just going to clean the bathroom up so you could use it.” you blatantly lie, waiting to see if he’d argue.

“stop with the bullshit, y/n.” there it is; his façade falls.

“what bullshit?” you play, fake confusion in your face.

“enough, y/n. please.”

“did you smell it?” you snap, your head twitching to the left lightly as you say it.

you watch how jays face turns from embarrassment to horror, stumbling over his words.

“n-no but i picked them up, yes—“ you can’t help but smirk in shock, lips parted.

“did you taste it?”

“..no.” he’s too slow to answer, and the way he says it is too unnatural.

“don’t believe you. can i smell your breath?” you ask, regardless of the fact that whatever he did do with those panties wouldn’t be enough for you to smell; especially past where he had previously touched his face.

he doesn’t answer.

“fuck that’s so hot.” you moan in response as your eyelids flutter a bit, nearly stumbling. jays right hand reaches out for your neck before he pulls you in, kissing you with such force you’re surprised your teeth didn’t hit his. your hands come up to hold his right forearm and waist, his right hand hooking around the side of your face cupping around your ear.

his left moves to grab the nape of your neck, holding you firmly in the kiss as you moan at the sudden affection. as the kiss deepens he lets you lead it, fire coursing through your veins as you clench around nothing.

“you wanna taste more?” you playfully ask, your eyes opening as he pulls away.

“if you’d let me.” he politely responds, his eyes shifting back-and-forth between yours.

your eyes gloss over at the comment, pulling away to walk towards your bed to the right. jay walks over slowly, his right hand undoing his wristwatch. you sit up on the bed, looking up at him slightly, your legs on either side of his as he stands so close in front of you.

he places the watch down with his left hand—his right hand pointing behind you. he says nothing, but you scoot to the middle of the bed regardless, your eyes eating him up. he starts to unbutton his pants, looking you in your eyes.

you have the most energy you’ve felt thus far, grabbing the waist of your pants to match his speed. you yank them down and off, throwing them to the left when you realize just how wet you really are.

you upper inner thighs glisten, your panties so wet they practically glisten as well.

jay catches wind of how wet you are with a groan, his pants unbuttoned, still sitting at his waist. he kneels on the bed before walking over a bit, close to your legs. his right hand pushes your right thigh before tapping your left—your legs part for him. that same floral scent from before hitting you harder than it ever had this afternoon, almost catching you off guard.

his right hand lightly trails up your left thigh, the sensation causing your legs to twitch. once his hand reaches your panties, he presses down once, some of the wetness seeping through the fabric onto his fingers.

he moans out loud at this, his index and middle finger lightly pulling the left side of your panties over, exposing you.

“wow..” he comments to himself, his thumb lightly pushing your left labia over, then your right.

his middle finger holds your panties out of the way, pushing you to momentarily think about how loose they’re gonna be on your left leg after this.

“take these off.” he lightly orders as he pulls his hand away—and you do, carefully pulling your legs together as you scoot up momentarily to do so.

you pull them down both legs with your right hand, the fabric tangling with itself until they’re off your legs. you hold them hooked into your right hands middle finger, you looking at him to spread your legs again.

“wanna keep these?” you ask and jay doesn’t hesitate to grab them from you with his left, putting the crotch of the panty between his teeth as he moves to stand. you moan at the imagery, watching as he pulls his dick out of his pants and grey calvin klein underwear. he’s not too long, but he’s thick, sporting a small bush of hair. he drops his pants to the floor, his briefs following as you stares between your legs as motivation.

he moves back up, both articles of clothing falling off his right, then left left ankle. he settles back on the bed, his left hand reaching towards you.

“get up.” he orders as he takes the panties out of his mouth, dropping them beside his briefs. you shift on the bed slightly, sitting down momentarily. jay pulls at his own top, ripping it up and over his head as you fight to do the same, leaving your bra.

you watch as jay falls on your bed, taking your previous spot. jay beckons you to hover over his head as he lays flat on your comforter, eyes heavy.

knee walking to jays torso, you almost hold your breath, his eyes watching as you slowly position yourself near his face, clenching.

the moment you swing your leg over jays shoulder, he moves down just enough to help you position better, his hands reaching around both your thighs to pull you down.

his tongue boldly swipes up between your folds to your clit before circling it. his lips purse a bit around the bud, sucking lightly. “oh my god!” you scream, your hands falling forward, over his head. he hums on your clit in reaction, opening his mouth wider to suck a wider area.

he doesn’t miss a beat or a drop, his tongue chasing and swiping up every new slip of arousal from between your lips.

it’s euphoric. he practically makes out your clit, your mouth hanging open as your eyes close. you start to lightly rock against his lips and tongue and he lets you—encourages you to—using his hands to urge you forward again every time you moved back.

“oh, jay..” you moan out loud, only imagining how heavy and hot his cock probably is behind you. against your better judgement, you pull off immediately, jays lips still pursed. “what?” he asks, watching as you lift your left leg up. you don’t answer his question, his hands falling on the bed out away from his sides as he watches you, lips and chin shiny.

when you turn your direction to face his feet, he immediately gets it, slapping your right thigh, telling you to hurry.

you do, your right leg hooking over as you’re face to face with his dick, just as heavy as you imagined.

you don’t know where to start at first, but jay simply resumes what he was doing before, now holding your lower back to push you down onto his tongue.

he sucks on your clit in intervals, changing the vibration constantly. you almost gag at how good it feels, saliva pooling in your mouth as you stare longingly at his dick and upper thighs. your right hand comes up to hold it, simply grabbing it at the base.

he moans against you, his left hand slapping your ass once to encourage you as his arms curl up and around your thighs.

you lightly rock on his face in return, getting off on the way his lips and tongue rub against your clit. you lean down further, ass in the air more as you slowly let the drool dribble out of your mouth, dripping on and around jays tip. jays dick twitches at the feeling, and you can’t help but clench at the sight.

“i could lay here for hours.” jay whispers momentarily behind you to himself, his fingers digging into your skin.

“i wish you could.” you respond back softly as he resumes, tensing his tongue as he moves his chin up and down, his tongue swiping between your folds. your right hand collects your saliva as it moves elsewhere before pumping him fully one time, playing close attention to his tip.

“fuck.” he whispers silently, the soft heat of his breath fanning your wet, sensitive skin. you lean down to wrap your lips around his tip before sinking halfway down, your right hand meeting you in the middle. you swivel your hand side to side while stroking the base of jays cock, your lips bobbing up and down at a slow, steady pace. jay thrusts once before twitching, his lips unhooking from their constant abuse against your clit.

it’s all fine to you, continuing to suck him off.

he smells good everywhere, hilariously including his balls. he’s clean from head to toe, the only smell radiating off of him being his own natural alpha scent—the reason why you were drooling so much.

you continue to bob your head, saliva practically pouring out of your mouth at the salty taste of his precum. you bite your bottom lip the moment you pull off with a pop, stroking him up and down with a strong fist. jays sucking against your clit is relentless, so you pull forward, enough for him to not push you back down.

the head was fun, but you needed more to be truly sedated.

“you gotta fuck me. like, now.” you spit, shame out the window. you crawl down before lifting your right leg up and over him again. jay sits up a bit, his elbows holding him up. you finally reach for your sports bra, pulling it over your left shoulder before quickly ripping it off. it comically flings off in the distance with the force you use, and jay huffs a laugh out at the way you don’t bother to look for it.

you climb back up his body, this time hovering over his lower thighs before crawling up a bit more. your left hand comes up to jays stomach, holding him still as you cowered over his erection. it lays heavy on jays pelvis, jays legs bending slightly to plant his heels into the bed. he reaches up with his right hand to lazily grab one of your pillows before stuffing it behind his head, patient.

he watches how you lightly grab his dick with your thumb, index and middle finger. you breathe in and out to cool your racing heartbeat before lining him up, his tip lightly brushing up and down your entrance and clit as you selfishly rub yourself up against his tip—claiming him in omega terms.

he lets you, his hands coming up to lightly rub up and down your thighs as he bites a little of his bottom lip. initially, you put just his tip in, bringing your hands away so you can could lay them on jays chest.

in one swift move, you plop down on, your thighs clenching in anticipation.

he knocks the wind out of you, immediately evoking tears at how good and full you feel.

jays immediately worried, grabbing your hips to stop you as you cry out.

“no—stop—please.” you beg, hands scrambling to get him to stop pulling you upwards. “it’s so good, please.” you confess, his eyes watching between your legs.

you couldn’t be lying, the way you rain down on his length, your scent flooding the room.

he’s astonished, smirking slightly as he watches you bounce slowly, your body—especially your boobs—shaking with your movements.

each snap of your ass against jays thighs clap within the four walls of your room, jays left hand finding your right hand in the heat of the moment. he interlocks his fingers with yours, his right hand coming up to reach for your your neck.

you lean forward for him, your left hand holding you upwards on his upper stomach. he lightly squeezes either side of your neck, slowing blood flow as he watches you shiver incessantly.

he lets you continue riding, watching your face for discomfort. he pulls his hand away from your grip, using his left elbow to hold his body weight up. the moment you get a little too weak to continue bouncing, jay lets your neck go, a loud moan falling from your lips.

his heels dug into your bed, hands grabbing your hips harshly as he moving you with him. he thrusts up as he brings you down onto his length, your mouth hanging open with each meet.

he grits his teeth like before, his eyes piercing into your skull as he watches your head hang and bounce. his stamina is amazing—partially because of his wolf type—but also because of his own fitness routine.

he’s relentless, his face mirroring yours as he gets closer. “fuck, y/n look at me.” he orders, his eyes waiting. his eyes lightly glow gold as he keeps thrusting, and your inner omega nearly howling at the attention.

“i should—mark you too—shouldn’t i.” he comments between thrusts, his eyes on you.

“maybe.” you tease, smiling at the way jay looks away in annoyance, focusing on thrusting.

“okay—yes. you should.” you correct yourself, watching how his eyes snap back to you.

“i don’t think i’ll ever—get dick—this good—from anyone else.” you admit, the tension in the room thick.

he takes this as a green light, sitting up fully to drop you down on the bed between his legs. he slips out of you momentarily as he scoots back, pulling his legs out from beside you.

without missing another beat, he grabs himself with his right hand as he kneels before you, lining himself up between your sprawled out legs. he looks down at you with a smile before pushing in, bringing his right hand up to lightly suck at the tips of his fingers, thrusting slowly.

you’re enamoured with the way he insists on tasting every bit of you, his left hand snaking up to wrap around your neck again. he squeezes the sides of your neck again like before, leaning over you. your head sits still in his grasp, mouth hanging open slightly with each thrust.

your mouth hangs when jays right hand sits right against the fat of your pussy, his thumb rubbing your bud side to side. he bites his lip as he watches your response, his brows frowning.

as time passes, the lack of blood to your head has you dizzy like earlier today.

he’s so close, and so are you.

“want me to bite you, baby?” jay asks, his eyes still lightly glowing.

“yes!” you moan out loud, eyes almost crossed as they lay closed with the constant stimulation.

“you wanna have everyone smelling me on your body as you walk through the office? have everyone know i claimed you?” he continues, working himself up. you can only whine and pant, your hands slowly reaching out for him.

he takes both his hands away from their tasks, collecting both your hands in his right hand, holding them to your chest. he lets out a soft ‘ah’, his left hands thumb repositioning itself on your clit.

he rubs harsher than before, and you can’t help but thrash around. you can feel the buildup in your chest, but you can’t get there until he finally sinks his canines into your skin, no matter the location. “please.” you beg, waiting for the sign.

a loud moan pours from jays lips as he falls forward, both his hands resting above your head, setting your hands free. you snake your hands up his back, encouraging him to lean in closer.

he takes you by surprise, pushing his lips into yours for another passionate kiss, his hands holding your head still.

suddenly, while pulling away, he harshly bites down into the upper inside of your bottom lip. his thrusts transform into a persistent grind.

the pain is unbearable, a soft cry leaving your lips as tears stream down your face. it’s very unconventional as a marking spot, but it triggers your orgasm regardless.

a long moan leaves your lips for the final time, your bottom teeth blood stained as your back slowly arches upwards.

jay pulls his teeth out of your lip as you do so, grinding against you. blood lightly lines his inner lips as he shutters above you, spurts of cum warmly seeping inside of you.

the taste in your mouth is metallic, but it doesn’t bleed past the initial pierce of jays teeth. a light amount of blood sits in each small piercing, quickly healing. jay licks his lips at once, cleaning the rest of your blood as you slowly come to your senses, blinking away tears.

he’s immediately apologetic.

“i’m so sorry, i don’t know why i bit you there—or at all.” he answers, the guilt sinking in. your head is a little cloudy still, but you’re a lot better off than you were before, smiling.

“that was probably the best thing you did today.” you answer, your hands coming up to cup the sides of his face. he still sits inside of you, his body and erection cooling down.

“how do you feel about marking me?” you ask, your eyes searching his. “fantastic. i really do like you, y/n.” he confesses, the corners of your mouth curling into a soft smile.

“i meant it when i said i saw something more in you.” he finishes, leaning down to kiss you softly, your eyes closing. you two lazily kiss one another, your bodies hot and sticky. he pulls away from you to kiss your bottom lip apologetically, smiling.

“fuck, what time is it?” jay asks, pulling his face away to aimlessly look around your room for a clock. when he doesn’t spot one, he sits back, pulling himself out of you slowly.

you moan at the retraction, sitting up in the bed as you felt his and your cum slowly seep out of you. his right hand reaches back for his watch as he knee walks over. squinting at the roman numbers,

2:58

he chuckles to himself, throwing his watch back on the bedside table before climbing off your bed to stand. he holds his right hand out to you, watching as you cup your pussy with your right hand to shimmy and slide off the bed. “why’re you doing that?” he asks, and you look at him through squinted eyes.

“i’m not leaving all this cum on my bed.” you answer, jay laughing once as he pulls you upright, wrapping your arms around his neck with both his hands.

“then lets get you back in the shower, hm?” he asks, his arms curling around your sides. he plants a kiss near your left temple before letting you move your face again, planting a kiss on the bridge of your nose.

© SJYFAVE ON TUMBLR

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my heart is full

Coffee & Cream - L. HS

Pairing: virgin heeseung + virgin female reader!

Warnings: love making, unprotected intimacy, angst, lots of crying, jealously, cursing, verbal and physical abuse, alcohol, blood, violence, assault, injuries, police, pet abuse, pregnancy, lots of fluff, heeseung is adopted, homelessness, slowest of slow burn, fairytale, they both just little softies for each other.

Summary: one chilly night after a long work shift, you’re unfortunately forced to walk home. Cause you left your bag at work, half way through your journey you stumble across a homeless man who you naturally offer money to, and he though he refuses. You give it to him anyway, and down the road, you’ll find that those two dollars changed not only his life but yours as well.

Number of words: 36k+?

Note: Hello, everyone. Here It is, finally. I’m so happy with how it turned out. This is by far my favorite story of all, so I hope you enjoy it. sorry for the long wait; I just wanted it to be perfect, and I think I achieved that. Please, please, please reblog and leave feedback. I put a lot into this, so I’d love to hear all of your opinions. With that being said, thank you all for being patient with me. I present to you

“Coffee & Cream”

Find your way around!

9:03 pm

You were on your way home from work with nothing but the idea of sleep on your mind after the tiresome shift you had just finished working. You walked a few blocks down the road, arriving at the bus stop minutes later. You reached for your bag to get your payment ready, and that's when you realized you had forgotten it at work, which left you with absolutely no money for the bus and instead of going back to the cafe you worked at to get your bag you opted to power through the walk home, even though your feet were killing you. "Come on, y/n, you got this, just a little longer." You gave yourself a pep talk on the way there. It wasn't that long of a walk from the cafe, so you'd be home soon enough. It was just very inconvenient.

You picked up your pace a bit. After all, it was well past nine, and you didn't know what kind of danger you might run into, especially as a woman walking alone at night.

Walking further down the road, you slowed your steps when you saw a man bent over rummaging through a trash bin, and your heart immediately softened.

You assumed he was probably searching for empty cans to collect money or maybe even something to eat, which made you undeniably sad.

You always had a soft spot for the homeless and less fortunate, and whenever you could, you'd always lend them a helping hand, not only cause you would want someone to do the same for you if you were in their situation but also because you were a person with a big heart and you wanted to give back when and wherever you could.

You reached for your bag again to give the man some money, but obviously, it wasn't there cause you had negligently left it at work. "Darn," you sighed softly. You contemplated going back, but by now, they had probably already closed down for the night, and you didn't want to trouble the employees who were cleaning and getting ready to go home.

You patted down all your pockets in search of spare change, and to your luck and the homeless man's luck, you found two whole dollars, which, now that you thought about it, you could have used for the bus, but oh well, it was going to better use now anyways. "Excuse me, sir," you said softly as you walked towards the unknown man. "I know it's not much, but I wanted to give this to you."

"I don't need your help," he replied in a harsh tone, making you frown instantly, you thought he would have been happy to receive the money, but he almost sounded offended that you even offered.

However, you didn't let it get your mood down. You just left the two bills on the bench next to him and continued your journey home.

Heeseung took a glance at your back while you walked home, then at the money you had set down, and as much as he didn't want to, he took the two dollars you gave him cause he knew he'd be looking for bottles and cans till early morning just to get enough to buy himself some dinner for the night.

He zipped up his hoodie and went to the convenience store across the street, grabbing three items off the shelf and paying for them. With the money you gave him, he bought two cups of ramen and a single meat stick.

He walked to the back of the store and prepared the noodles. Once they were done, he sat down in the corner of the store, slurping up the ramen within just a few minutes. He hadn't eaten in three whole days, and he cherished every last bite of that meal. Finally, he could get some peace and quiet without his stomach rumbling every other minute.

Once he finished eating, he left the store, blowing a deep breath into the chilly night air as he headed back to what he called home, which was an alleyway that was only a few blocks from the convenience store.

He whistled down the narrow path, and he couldn't help but smile as he heard the familiar sound of a mental chain rustling against the pavement. "Hey, boy!" He kneeled down in front of his dog, Mylo, who was giving him thousands of little kisses everywhere. "Did you miss me?" Mylo jumped on his lap and licked all over his cheeks excitedly. "Yes, you did," heeseung giggled. "I got you something!" He pulled the beef stick from his pocket, and Mylo's ears perked up at the sound of the plastic being torn. "Here you go, buddy!" Mylo was absolutely ravenous, and ten seconds didn't even pass before the whole thing was completely devoured.

Heeseung couldn't help but feel bad as Mylo sniffed the empty packaging, searching for more food. "I'm sorry, Buddy, that's all there is". Mylo let out a sad whimper, nudging the empty plastic with his nose, and his ears drooped down when he realized there was nothing left. "I know, I know, come here." heeseung wrapped Mylo up in his arms, stroking his back while he hugged him. "Don't be sad, buddy. Daddy's got an interview in a few days, and we'll be off the street in no time. You'll have more dog treats than you even know what to do with promise," Mylo's eyes lit up at the mention of dog treats, one of the few words he actually understood. "Yeah, you like the idea of that, huh?" Heeseung said with a chuckle, reaching into his dingy bag and grabbing Mylo's makeshift dog bowl, which was made of a gallon jug with the top half cut off. He filled it with some sink water he got from the convenience store and served it to Mylo. "Drink up," he said, lying down on his sleeping bag. He released a deep sigh while Mylo lapped up his water.

Heeseung wasn't always homeless, but that didn't mean his life was any better than it was out here on the streets.

After all, being adopted into an abusive family wasn't his ideal childhood, nor was it an experience that he wished for; nevertheless, he didn't have a choice but to live with them after his biological parents so willingly gave him away.

He doesn't know why his real parents would have a child and then just throw them into the world to grow up with complete strangers.

A part of him wanted to know why, but he wasn't ready for the truth cause he was afraid that the answer would be far from good.

He knew he wouldn't be able to accept it, knowing that his parents had him by mistake, or maybe he would just be a burden to them, or maybe they abandoned him cause they just didn't love him.

No matter the reason, he was too scared to find out, so he convinced himself that maybe they just didn't have money to feed an extra mouth, or maybe his parents were too busy and they gave him to an adoption center so he could find a loving family that would take care of him.

Those all sounded better than all the previous options, so as the years passed by, he never resented his parents for giving him up for adoption. Instead, he created a good image of them in his head and believed strongly that no matter where they were, they were thinking about him and loving him from afar.

And that positivity is what kept him going for so long. It's what made him the man he is today. Well, that and Mylo.

Even growing up with adoptive parents who abused him, he always looked on the bright side, but he could only take so much, and after the verbal abuse turned physical, he walked out without looking back. There was no way he could stay there. The only thing he took with him was his dog Mylo, who was always by his side through thick and thin.

Heeseung remembers the first and only time when his father hit him. He was playing around the house with his basketball ball, and being a careless young kid having fun, he accidentally threw the ball across the living room and shattered his father's 75" TV. As soon as the TV hit the floor, he knew that he was in big trouble, so he ran to the dining room and hid under the kitchen table, attempting to hide from his dad. Needless to say, that wasn't much of a shelter cause his dad easily yanked the chairs from the table and pulled him out by his leg.

He remembers crying in fear and apologizing over and over again. He begged his father not to hit him, but his dad didn't listen, and he pulled his belt from the loops on his pants, whipping him countless times with the leather, leaving large welts all over his small arms and legs. "No wonder your parents gave you up. You're nothing but a useless pain in the ass," his dad yelled at him as he continued hitting him.

That incident is how heeseung found out that he was adopted in the first place, and he cried even harder as he laid there and took every blow, too shocked by the devastating news to even fight back.

Soon, the blows came to a sudden stop, and he heard Mylo growling. Everything had happened so fast, and before he knew it, Mylo was biting his dad on his arm, sinking his large fangs and puncturing his dad's flesh. "Ow, get off me, you stupid dog!" His dad then turned to Mylo and kicked him in the stomach, sending him flying across the room and making him whimper in pain. "I'm not done with you, you hear me." he pointed his finger in the crying boy's face, and little did anyone know that would be the last time heeseung saw his family.

Mylo ran over to heeseung, nudging his cheek with his muzzle.

Heeseung overheard his dad calling his mother, and that's when he used the chance to escape. He ran out the front door with Mylo and his leash, and that was the start of his homelessness.

But he didn't have a choice. It was either to get abused or run away, and running away seemed like the safer option.

Despite being homeless, he wouldn't change his mind about the decision he made all those years ago. Living out here was hard, but living with people who were supposed to love you but treated you like you were less than human was harder than anything he'd ever faced in his entire life. He expected that from strangers, not family.

Once Mylo finished his water, he snuggled up next to heeseung, licking his cheek a few times before resting his head on his chest. "Goodnight, boy." heeseung kissed his head and shielded him from the cold air with his shaggy hoodie. Today was rough, but at least they had food in their stomachs, and at this point, Heeseung couldn't ask for more as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

☕️.

"Can this place get any busier?" You said to yourself as you heard the doorbell ring, indicating that more customers were flooding into the small cafe.

"I'd say so," your co-worker Sunghoon replied as a group of students came bustling through the very busy doors one after the other. "No break for us" he chuckled and made his way over to the cash register.

"Tell me about it," you say as you finish cleaning the dishes and get everything ready to prepare the nonstop orders coming in.

A few minutes later, sunghoon came to the back, dragging his feet with his shoulders slumped. "Can you take orders for me, and I'll make them? I think my head is going to explode if I hear iced Americano one more time." he sighed and rubbed his temples in exhaustion. "Where's Niki when you need him?"

“Off enjoying his vacation remember?” You chuckled softly. "Hang in there." You pat his shoulder. "Only five more hours," you say, adding to his misery.

"Now, why would you remind me? Like seriously, what is wrong with you?" He glared at you, but you knew he was only kidding, partially anyway.

You giggled at his expression on your way out of the back to switch places with him and take orders.

That's just the relationship you had with each other day in and day out. Joking about each other's misery was what got you through the long and dreadful days of working at the cafe; some days were good, some days were bad, and some days, like today, were the definition of hell.

Surprisingly enough, it came to an end much sooner than you had both expected, but the time does fly when you're busy. "We don't get paid enough for this," Sunghoon grumbled while wiping down the last table as it was now closing time.

"But it pays the bills," you chimed as you cleared the register.

"That it does," he hummed. "I'll finish closing for the night. You should head home before it gets any darker," he advises, knowing you normally walk or take the bus home.

"Aww, sunghoon, you're the best," you squeal. "You're always so considerate."

"Yeah, yeah," he mumbles, but you could tell deep down he was happy by the little smile forming on his lips.

"Lunch is on me tomorrow. You can get anything you want," You promise.

"I'm holding you to it!" he shouted so you could hear him in the back as you gathered your belongings, not forgetting your bag like the last time.

"See you tomorrow!" You waved on your way out.

"See you, y/n. Be safe." he waved bye after he let you out and locked the doors behind you.

You shivered as the cold wind blew across your face. It was chilly but somehow refreshing after being cooped up all day. You breathed in the night air and decided to walk home again instead of taking the bus after your busy day. Tonight, you would like to take a break from being surrounded by so many people.

You took the same sidewalk home as before, and just like last night, you saw the same man from yesterday digging in another garbage bin.

You automatically reached inside your purse and took out the first bill you found, which just so happened to be twenty dollars. Despite the questionable pay at the cafe, you did make great money in tips, so twenty dollars was really nothing to fret about for you. "Here you go, sir," you said politely.

Heeseung turned around at the sound of a familiar voice, and he saw you standing there, extending your hand out to him with a twenty-dollar bill. He knew you were the same girl from last night cause of your work attire. He couldn't understand why you were trying to help him. Most people didn't even look his way, let alone give him any change when he begged for it, so why were you? Especially after the way he treated you last night.

He looked at you, a blank expression on his face while you smiled genuinely and beckoned him to take the money.

Before heeseung could tell you off, Mylo's ears perked up at the sound of your voice, and he jumped off the bench to greet you, nearly tackling you in the process. "Woah! Where did you come from?" You giggled as he slobbered all over your face. You didn't mind it at all. You had a German shepherd at home, and she was the same exact way every time you got back home from work. "What's your name, Hmm?" You talked to him in a cutesy voice while you patted his head, searching for a name tag, but you frowned when you didn't see one.

"Mylo!" Heeseung said sternly and tried to tug him back, but he wouldn't listen. Usually, He was a very well-trained and well-behaved dog, but sometimes, even Heeseung couldn't get him to listen. "I'm so sorry," heeseung said to you as he grabbed Mylo by his collar and held him back.

"It's quite alright. Nice meeting you, Mylo." You waved to him while heeseung held him back. "Here, take it." You extended your hand once again, giving him the twenty-dollar bill.

"I'm fine," heeseung declined rudely and turned around, getting ready to walk back home empty-handed.

"You may be fine, but what about that guy? A big dog like him, I'm sure he's hungry all the time," you reasoned cause you could literally feel his spine when you were petting him, and you're sure he probably needed to eat even more than your shepherd and that's saying a lot considering she ate pretty heartily.

Heeseung took a peek at Mylo, and you were right. He was huge, and Heeseung knew he wasn't getting half the nutrition he needed, especially with the fall coming soon, so he reluctantly took the cash. It was humiliating to accept help from others, but he swallowed his pride for Mylo's sake. "Say thank you," heeseung said to Mylo, and he walked towards you, brushing his head against your leg before going back to heeseung's side, panting softly and waging his tail excitedly.

You smiled at how well he was trained. Your dog definitely wasn't as well behaved as him. She was actually clumsy and quite the opposite. "Well, have a good night," you said to heeseung, and he just nodded his head. "And you too, Mylo." You continued your short walk home, and once you arrived, you could hear your fluffy friend barking and scratching from outside the door. "Hi!" You said excitedly as you opened the door and greeted her. 

She sniffed you intensely. At first, you were confused by her odd behavior, but realized that she was probably smelling Mylo's strong scent on you. She looked at you and tilted her head to the side with what you assumed to be curiosity. "Yeah, I met a dog just like you," you said in a baby voice. "He was big and brown and cute." She sat down in front of you, wagging her tail excitedly. "And his name is Mylo…" you trailed off as you thought about the similarities in their names. "Mylo and Myla, what a coincidence," you said as you walked over to your kitchen and refilled her food and water bowls. "Maybe you two could meet sometime," you said out loud, but she paid no attention to you as she dug into her food straight away. "Oh, I see, you're too good for boys, huh?" You laughed and patted her head before going to your living room and plopping down on the couch. "What is there to watch?" you scrolled through endless shows, and before something piqued your interest, you had dozed off on the couch with the TV still on.

☕️.

Later that same night, heeseung went to the convenience shop and bought some proper food for Mylo. "Wait here," he said to Mylo and tied his leash to the bike rack outside before going into the store. 

Once he grabbed the bag of dog food, he went straight to the register to pay, not without getting a judging look from the cashier first, but that was nothing new to him. If the number of glares he received were in the form of a dime, he'd be rich.

Kind of ironic.

"Your total is 8,59$" the cashier mumbled, and heeseung handed him the twenty dollar bill that you had given to him.

He looked out the store window while he was getting rung up and saw a group of boys surrounding the bike rack where he'd left Mylo. He stretched his neck to see if anything was happening, and he heard loud barking just a few seconds later. "Mylo!" He gasped in panic and ran out of the store immediately. All of the kids quickly scattered and ran near some bushes at the back of the store where they couldn't be spotted. "Hey!" Heeseung called out to them, but he didn't see the direction where they had all run off to. He just hoped they were long gone from the area. "Are you okay, buddy?" He bent down worriedly, checking Mylo for any injuries, and breathed a sigh of relief when he found none, but unfortunately, they had cut big patches out of his fur, destroying his lovely coat. "Oh, thank god," he whispers, hugging Mylo tightly while on his knees. "You're too nice, boy. You should have bit the crap out of 'em" he laughed quietly and stroked his back. "I'll be right back, okay?"

He quickly ran back into the store to grab the food and his change, making sure to check the window every second in case the kids came back. "Time to go home and have dinner." heeseung left the store and unhooked Mylo's leash, walking him across the street to the alleyway they stayed at. Little did he know the same kids from the earlier saw exactly where he and Mylo went.

"Look what I got!" He said excitedly while pouring Mylo a bowl of kibble. "Eat up." heeseung patted his head, a gentle smile gracing his lips as he watched Mylo digging in. "It's good, huh?" He chuckled. "Yeah, it is."

After Mylo ate, heeseung spent the rest of the night cuddling with him and singing him many different songs until they both drifted off to sleep together.

☕️.

You awoke to your face being licked and slobber wetting your cheeks, and, of course, you knew who the culprit was. "Good morning to you, too, myla." You sat up and stretched, looking at the time and seeing that you overslept for the millionth time this week. "Are you kidding me?" You rubbed your eyes tiredly. "Myla, why did you let me oversleep?" You played with her floppy ears, and she just wagged her tail, not understanding a lick of what you were saying.

You did your morning routine faster than the speed of light, and you spilled not only water but her kibble as well in your hurry so as not to be late for work. "Sorry, myla, see you later!" After you left, she curled up by the front door and huffed out a breath, missing you already.

You made it to work right on time, and the store was packed just like yesterday. Your brain was scattered from it still being early in the morning, but as soon as you punched in, you somehow managed to put on your apron, compose yourself, and take orders efficiently.

You knew the day would be a long, tiring one.

☕.

"Wait for me here, Buddy, and don't be noisy. Daddy will be back soon, okay?" Mylo sat down obediently while heeseung shielded him from the wind and made his way out of the alley.

He went to the nearest bus stop and waited impatiently for the bus to arrive. About five minutes later, he bought a ticket and was boarding to head to his job interview.

He took his seat and looked outside the window, enjoying the ride and scenery. Riding the bus definitely beats walking, but he didn’t have the luxury to ride it every day; he would only take the bus on special occasions like today.

Fifteen minutes later, the bus stopped and dropped him off at his designated location.

He walked into the tall building, taking one long breath, preparing himself for the interview before going to the restrooms to freshen himself up.

He quickly brushed his teeth as best as he could without a toothbrush and washed his face with hand soap from the dispenser. He sighed at his dingy appearance. Dark eye bags, unruly hair, and a scruffy face stared back at him in the reflection. "You can do this," he mumbled to himself and turned off the water, slicking his hair back with his fingers and changing into a cleaner shirt he kept in his backpack.

He exited the bathroom and went to the front desk to inform the receptionist of his upcoming interview. "Hi, my name is heeseung. I have an interview at four thirty with Mrs. Kim," he spoke softly to the receptionist as she typed in some information and made a phone call. "Take a seat anywhere you like, and she'll be right with you, sir."

"Thank you." heeseung smiled politely and took a seat.

A few moments later, a woman looking to be in her mid-forties approached him. "Hi! You must be heeseung?" She asked, extending her hand for him to shake.

"Y-yes, hello," heeseung replied nervously.

"Right this way." She led him to the back where her office was and shut the door behind him. "Have a seat." She sat down after him, leafing through some files. "Mmm," she frowned when she didn't see a resume under his name.

Heeseung gulped, nervously bouncing his leg up and down.

"I'm not seeing your resume." She looked through more documents and still came up with nothing.

"I uhh don't have any prior experience, ms." he looked down at his lap; whatever confidence he had completely disappeared at that moment.

"Well, you must have some prior experience in the work field. Tell me about your previous jobs." She closes the folder and places it on her desk, looking at him with a smile.

"This is the first time I've ever been interviewed," he said quietly. "I've never worked before."

Heeseung shifted uncomfortably when she looked over his appearance. "First time for everything, I suppose. What about school? Did you get a GED or graduate?"

"No, ms" he shook his head, and he had a bad feeling about what was going to come next.

Ms Kim let out a long sigh and rested back in her chair. "Well, heeseung, I'm sure you're a fine young man, but without any credentials, I simply cannot hire you for this job because we require a high level of education along with years of experience with very few exceptions in between,"

"But ms, please, I need this job. I can learn if you just give me a chance, I promise," he pleads.

"I'm sorry, but our company policies state otherwise. If it were up to me, I'd give you a shot, but-"

"You don't understand I need this job. I'll do anything, please, I beg of you," he says, desperation seeping into his tone.

"I'm sorry heeseung-"

"Sorry isn't going to fix my situation!" He raised his voice. "I can't live out there anymore. Do you hear me? I need to get off the street. It's not safe for me or my dog."

"Sir-"

"Please, ms! I have nothing! Can't you see?" He begged desperately, tears gathering in his eyes cause this was the one opportunity he needed to get on his feet, and he could feel it slipping out of his grasp.

Ms Kim had already hit the security button under her desk, and heeseung was being held back by his arms within seconds. "Get off me. I'm not doing anything wrong, ms Kim. Please give me a chance. I'll do anything." Tears rolled down his face as he got escorted out of the building by security. Once they had kicked him out, he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "Fuck!" He yelled and punched the side of the building, gaining the attention of the other citizens passing by, but he didn't care.

"Just fucking great," he said once he cooled down a bit and took a look at his wounded hand. He trudged down the sidewalk, completely demotivated, as he returned to the bus stop. "No job, no money, and an injured hand," he mumbled to himself on the way there, and he hung his head low while boarding the bus. "At least Mylo's waiting for me at home," he says, trying to look on the bright side of his very, very shitty day.

He stepped off the bus when it came to a complete stop. He was about to walk home, but his stomach growled. He tried to ignore it, but after he took another step, it happened again and again and again.

He supposed he should probably get something to eat cause it has been a full day without food, and he knew his stomach wouldn't stop until he got some type of nutrition in his body. Thankfully, he still had eleven dollars and some change from the money you'd given him the other night, so he could make good use of that.

He took in his surroundings; there was a small cafe a few blocks away, and he could definitely use a coffee to boost his rotten mood.

☕️.

You finally got a break between customers, but soon enough, the bell rang again, and you saw a man walk in. You did a double take, and if your eyes weren't mistaken, it was the homeless man you had been giving money to the past few nights. He looked a little better today, which made you smile brightly before walking to the register to take his order. "Hello sir, what can I get started on for you?" You asked politely and awaited his order.

He finally made eye contact with you and recognized that you were the girl who had been giving him money the past few nights. "I'll have a small black coffee and a breakfast sandwich, please." he places his order.

You nodded with a smile and gave him his total. "That will be 6.03$." 

He reached into his pocket, searching for the money, and his brows creased in confusion when he only saw a five and some change. It didn't take long for him to realize what had happened at the store last night. He didn't look at his cash back before leaving and must've been shorted on his change. "That fucker” he mumbled under his breath, and that was the last straw for him today.

"It's on me, so don't worry about it," you said kindly when you saw he didn't have enough money to pay, but it was fine. You'd be more than happy to pay for his meal and make his day just a little bit easier on him.

"I already told you I don't need your fucking help!" He yelled, drawing attention to himself at the register. "Just mind your own fucking business and leave me alone. I'm pathetic enough; I don't need your pity." You flinched at his harsh tone, and he turned away from the register, storming out of the cafe, leaving you shocked and rendered speechless.

"What a fucking psycho," Sunghoon said, appearing from the back after hearing all the ruckus upfront. "Sorry, I couldn't come sooner. Are you okay?" He asked and patted your back comfortingly.

"Y-yeah, just a little startled, that's all." You blinked a few times to try and collect yourself from the homeless man's sudden outburst.

"Do you know him? What did he mean by not wanting your help?" Sunghoon asked curiously.

"I… don't want to talk about it right now." Sunghoon immediately backed off when he saw the uncomfortable look on your face.

"Hey, why don't you take a break? It's slowed down a bit, so I can handle the register," He offers.

"Thanks, hoon," you said with a small smile, still a bit miffed by what just happened.

☕.

"Hey, Mylo," heeseung mumbled. Once he returned home, Mylo perked up, greeting him with kisses immediately. "No kisses for me today, Buddy. Daddy's been a very bad man," he sighed and laid on his sleeping bag, trying to close his eyes and sleep. However, it was far too noisy at this time of day, and his stomach still wouldn't stop growling, but after the shit day he had, he didn't feel like going out to eat or search for cans.

Time seemed to pass by slower than ever, especially with the mood he was in, but at least Mylo seemed happy eating his kibble.

He thought about everything that happened earlier today, and no matter what, he couldn't get the look of your startled face out of his head or the way he unintentionally harassed ms Kim. He's lucky he just got kicked out and nothing more. "I'm such an asshole" heeseung covered his face with his palms sighing out loud.

Mylo nudged his elbow, but Heeseung still wouldn't budge. He kept his face down as tears gathered in his eyes.

Today was probably the worst day he'd ever had, and everything just kept piling up on him day by day.

He couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Hell, there wasn't even a tunnel at this point, and if Mylo wasn’t with him, he probably would have given up a long time ago.

His adoptive dad was right.

He was useless.

After his breakdown, the sun had set, and he was finally able to get some sleep once the lively city died down, but not for long.

Heeseung woke up later that night from the feeling of something touching him and disturbing his sleep. "Mylo?" He said groggily, and his eyes couldn't even adjust before he felt a hard kick on his stomach, making him groan in pain. 

"Wakey wakey asshole," Heeseung popped up but was instantly thrown back down and kicked in the chest multiple times. He tried to lift his fist, but someone had him pinned down arm by arm, and he was absolutely defenseless.

The last thing he heard was Mylo's barking before he passed out from a brutal blow to the face.

He woke up at god knows what time to Mylo sitting on top of him and nuzzling his face into his neck. "Thank goodness you're okay." heeseung hugged Mylo tightly, breathing a sigh of relief, as Mylo whimpered at his owner's tattered face and poor condition. "Don't be sad. Daddy's fine. I can take a hit, you know that." 

Heeseung tried his best to stand up but he underestimated his injuries. "Ow! fuck!” he grimaced in pain as he fell back down, coughing uncontrollably from all the hits he took right in the center of his frail chest.

There was no way he could go back to sleep like this and possibly get into even more danger, and he couldn't waste a whole night without looking for any form of money, and Mylo's food was already running dangerously low.

He willed himself to stand up after a minute, and he untied Mylo, hobbling down the alleyway and getting ready to go on his nightly hunt for money.

Halfway down the street, he had to sit down and take a breather on one of the benches because the pain had started to really set in. "Daddy needs a minute." he tugged Mylo's collar, and he came back, sitting next to heeseung on the bench. "We're going to get lucky tonight, boy, I just know it." even though he knew his words held no real stock, he said them out loud to reassure and convince himself to believe those words were true just so he could keep going.

He heard the sound of footsteps growing nearer, and he quickly got off the bench just in case the stranger would start any conflict. He was in no shape, or form to defend himself or Mylo after getting beat up so badly.

"Hey," you said, causing him to stop in his tracks when he heard your familiar voice.

He turned around and saw you standing there with a hardened expression, a bag in your left hand, and a coffee cup in your other. "Y-yes?" He answered softly, almost like he was scared of being scolded by you and ashamed to face you after what he did today.

"Despite you being rude earlier, I still got this for you." You showed him the two items in your hand. It was the exact order that he had placed earlier in the afternoon. "I thought about not even getting it for you, honestly, but before I misjudged you, I thought maybe you were just having a bad day," you said kindly, even though you were still kinda angry with him. "So, in case you are having a bad day, I bought this for you, hoping it'd turn your bad day into a good one." 

He was hesitant about accepting help from you, but he decided to accept it this time since he rudely declined earlier.

He tried to grab the items from you, but he winced in pain. You frowned at the sight of clear discomfort on his face, and when he stepped a bit closer to you, the light from the street lamp hit his face just right. You could see bruises and cuts everywhere on his swollen face.

You gasped quietly as he took the items from your hands, and you didn't have time to react before he turned around and walked away. "Wait!" You stopped him and reached into your purse. "Here," you said, handing him a bag of dog treats you had bought earlier for the express purpose of giving them to Mylo.

"Thank you," he muttered. Mylo barked excitedly, knowing exactly what it was, and wagged his tail while sniffing the bag. "Let's go home, boy," he tugged on Mylo's leash, but he didn't budge. Heeseung looked behind his shoulder and saw Mylo rolling around at your feet, and you had ducked down to give him a belly rub. "Mylo!" Heeseung called to him sternly, and he retreated back to heeseung's side with a displeased yelp. "Let's go." with that, heeseung limped along the sidewalk, and you sighed sadly. He looked fine earlier, but now he looked bloody and bruised, and you didn't miss the bald patches on Mylo's back. You assumed someone had assaulted them, and your heart ached at the thought. You couldn't imagine how hard that must have been for them, and you couldn't even begin to imagine how scared they both were.

You knew he told you to mind your business, but how could you do it when he looked like he could barely even walk?

You sighed as you walked back home. You unlocked your door and were instantly greeted by Myla. "Hi, girly!" You said happily, and she nearly tackled you in excitement and started licking all over your face.

You smiled happily, but a few seconds later, it turned to a frown as you remembered poor little Mylo. He looked so excited to see new faces, and you couldn't help but think about how he and Myla would get along. They were both German shepherds and had the same playful personality, plus she would love the company.

Your thoughts wandered to what the homeless man's personality was. He seemed cold and harsh and mean, even a little scary, but with a sweetheart of a dog like that, you figured there had to be more layers to the mystery man.

Your thoughts went far beyond that, and you started thinking about if he was always homeless, what his story was, and how he got to be who he is today.

Strangely enough, your thoughts went to an even more personal place, and you found yourself thinking of how he looked when he entered the cafe. He was fairly tall. He had a slender build and quite a handsome face.

You shook your head, erasing that thought from your mind cause who the heck thinks like that about someone they don't even know? "Sleep, that's what I need, sleep." You slapped your cheeks lightly, convincing yourself that you were just tired, and that's why you were having such irrational thoughts so late at night.

But even as you laid your head on your pillow to go to sleep for the night, your mind was still stuck on the guy with the Shepard named Mylo.

☕.

Heeseung was more than floored when he ate the food you had bought for him. It was delicious, the best thing he's had in years. He doesn't know if it was cause you gave it to him or maybe it's just cause he was so hungry, who knows. "She's a nice girl, isn't she Mylo?" Heeseung said as he fed him the dog treats you had bought. "I can tell you like her." he chuckled and took a sip of the hot black coffee. "I like her too." Mylo tilted his head at the sudden change in heeseung's tone. It was a fond one, something neither of them was used to hearing. "What is it?" Mylo cut his eyes at heeseung and turned back to eating his treats. "Why are you looking at me like that? It's not like I like her like that or anything." heeseung put his hands up in defense as if Mylo actually understood what was being said. "What am I even saying?" he smiled, embarrassed as he caught himself thinking about you for no apparent reason. "She's just a nice girl," he convinces himself that that's all he thought of you.

Even if he did like you more than that, who is he kidding? He couldn't be a good boyfriend, let alone a man. He had no way to provide for you, no car, no job, no money, just his bummy self, and what girl would want someone useless like that?

He sighed at the thought as a feeling of loneliness crept up on him slowly but surely; nevertheless, he shook it off. He had Mylo, his best friend, and that was enough. Besides, he had enough things to worry about, and a relationship wasn't one. "No more treats, you're gonna get sick," he said as he took the bag of treats away from Mylo. He put them inside the brown bag you had given him earlier, and his eyes nearly bulged from his head when he saw a bunch of bills in the bottom of the bag that he somehow hadn't noticed until now, but he supposed he was so excited about eating that he barely even looked.

He excitedly dumped the cash on the ground and counted it as a hundred dollars in small bills. "We're rich, Mylo!" He jumped up from his sleeping bag, and Mylo, just as excited, stood up on his hind legs, putting his paws on his owner's shoulders. "We're rich, we're rich," he sang happily while dancing with Mylo. "We're rich, we're rich, we're rich." nothing but excited barks and laughter came from the alleyway as heeseung's and Mylo's night came to a very sweet end.

☕️.

For the next few weeks, you gave the homeless man and Mylo dinner. You got a free meal from the cafe every day, so it was nothing for you anyway. Plus, you were more than happy to do it for him even if you did have to pay for it. The genuine smile on his face was worth more than any dollar bill in the world. "Goodnight, Mylo," you said in the same baby voice that you used for Myla, and heeseung did his best to hold back a laugh, but nevertheless, he thought it was adorable.

"Say bye-bye, Mylo," heeseung said after a couple minutes of letting him play with you.

For the first time since you saw them, he actually seemed to be in a good mood, and it put you in a good mood, too. "Goodnight, mystery man," you said playfully.

He merely nodded and smiled before he walked back home.

☕️.

"He is kinda cute, and his smile is so sweet," you talked to yourself while you lay in bed after getting home later that night, still feeling giddy after the small yet sweet moment with the homeless man down the street.

Myla was sitting at the edge of the bed, just staring at you while you lay there with a smile on your face, reliving earlier events. "Hey, don't judge me," you pointed your finger in her face. "I'm sure you'd like Mylo too," you argued, and she still just stared at you. "Hey, I'm not the one sleeping on a jacket with his scent on it," you smiled proudly while Myla nuzzled her face into the jacket more. "You're so cute," you giggled and shut your lamp off, drifting to sleep, and it was no surprise who was on your mind before you closed your eyes.

☕️.

Heeseung's life at the moment is better than it has ever been, all thanks to you. He didn't have to be out late at night searching for money or food cause you had been providing him with it every day, and he was so thankful for that, more than words could even express, but the least he could do was go see you and apologize properly for the way he treated you in the beginning.

Finally, he could afford the basics that he needed. 

Recently, he bought a new outfit, a simple white shirt, blue jeans, and a toothbrush and toothpaste to brush his teeth.

A few days later, he went to a rest stop and took a shower after what felt like years. It was quite far from him, but it was definitely worth the bus ride. 

Once he was finished cleaning up, he couldn't help but smile at his appearance. When he saw his reflection in the mirror, he felt like a new man completely. He took the bus back home to get Mylo's approval first before going to the cafe to see you. "Okay, today is the day, Buddy. How do I look?" Heeseung asked Mylo as he did a little spin.

"Woof woof!" Mylo rubbed himself on heeseung's leg, giving what heeseung could only take as his approval.

"I'll be back soon, alright? You know the drill, okay? No noise." he rubbed Mylo's cheeks one last time before starting his journey to see you.

He decided to walk instead of wasting money on the bus because the walk was about ten minutes, give or take, and he was no stranger to walking.

The cafe bell rang, making you pop your head up, looking at the customer who entered, and you smiled in surprise when you saw handsome, or at least that's what you referred to him as in your head cause you still hadn't gotten his name yet. 

"I'll take it," Sunghoon immediately interjected when he recognized the same man who came in a few weeks ago and yelled at you.

"It's okay, hoon, I got it," you assured him.

"Sure?" He asked one more time.

"Positive, we worked it out," you whispered, and sunghoon gave Heeseung one last look before walking away. "Hello!" You greeted him happily.

"H-hi," heeseung scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. You didn't even notice his stutter cause you were too focused on taking in his beauty in the daylight. "I-I just came here to apologize for the other day and all the trouble I caused. I was having a terrible day, and everything just kinda came tumbling down on me at once, and I know that's not an excuse to act the way I did. That's not like me at all, but yeah, I'm really sorry," he said sincerely.

He couldn't help but blush when you smiled at him so brightly. "Apology accepted…?" You trailed off, not knowing what to address him by.

"Oh! Heeseung, I'm heeseung," he chuckled after his initial awkward pause.

"Nice to finally meet you, mystery man." he chuckled at the nickname you'd given him.

"You too.." he squinted his eyes at your name tag. "Y/n," he said softly. There was another awkward pause before he cleared his throat. "I uhh also wanted to thank you for all you've done, and I'm f-forever grateful, but you don't have to." 

"It's no problem," you told him truthfully, still admiring his looks. He looked so much healthier and happier than when you first met him, and that made you feel so warm inside, knowing you were assisting him in getting back on his feet.

"But-" he tried to protest, but you shut it down right away.

"Would you like to order anything" you cut him off before he could argue.

He dropped his shoulders in defeat. By now, he knew you wouldn't take no for an answer. "I guess I'll have a black coffee," his stomach grumbled on cue, letting you know he wanted more than just a coffee.

"Black coffee and a breakfast sandwich. Anything else?"

"No, mam," he laughed and reached for the money in his back pocket, but you had already cashed him out and went behind the counter to prepare his order.

Heeseung sighed softly. He had a tough time accepting your generosity, but he couldn't lie. It was so much nicer to finally have someone to rely on instead of doing literally everything on his own. Because of you, he could get more sleep. His dog was well-fed, and so was he.

He supposed if he thought about it long enough, he had taken all the burden on himself to provide cause no one on the street would even give him a dime, and when that happened, he turned his back on people just like his parents turned their backs on him. He took on all one hundred percent of the responsibility and made a living for Mylo and himself.

So when you showed him sympathy or kindness, he didn't know how to react cause it was a foreign concept to him. He just got upset and thought you were feeling pity for him, which made him feel weak and incapable of doing it alone. But, after getting to know you for a while, he was able to open up to the idea of getting help cause, to him, it seemed like you genuinely wanted to lend him a helping hand, not just cause you felt sorry for him, but cause you actually cared and that's all he's ever wanted was to be seen, heard, and cared for, and well, here you are, doing all that for him and so much more.

You were smiling absentmindedly as you put a free pastry in his bag along with his sandwich. "You're in rare form today," Sunghoon chimed.

"Hmm," you hummed in agreement, neatly packing heeseung's food. 

"Wouldn't have anything to do with a certain handsome customer, would it?" He teased.

"Nope, nothing at all," you lied, and Sunghoon could see right through it.

"Sureeeeeee," you both came out from the back, and you slapped sunghoons shoulder playfully as he teased you.

"I don't blame you." he put his hands up In defense with a chuckle.

"What a lucky guy," heeseung muttered to himself, watching the interaction between you and your co-worker as he went to the register after you called his order number.

"Enjoy!" You smiled and handed him a smaller cup with whipped cream in it, and you wrote Mylo's name on the cup with little hearts surrounding it.

Heeseung smiled at the adorable treat you prepared for his furry friend. "Thank you," he said while chuckling. "You're definitely gonna be his new favorite after this." 

"With an owner like you, I'm sure that's impossible," you replied and only realized how flirty that sounded after it came out, but you didn't regret it when you saw him smile shyly.

"O-oh," he laughed awkwardly, and a blush crept up his neck. "T-thanks," he stutters.

"Of course! Have a good day, heeseung, and be safe, okay?" you smile.

"Yes, mam," he saluted and bid you goodbye. As soon as he got a block down the street, he had to lean against the wall and take a breather cause he was literally shaking with nerves. "Gosh, she's so beautiful," he breathed out with a hand resting on his racing heart.

"With an owner like you, I'm sure that's impossible." Sunghoon mimicked your tone after listening to your guy's whole conversation while he "cleaned" the tables.

"Shut it, hoon," you said, smiling uncontrollably.

"Yes, mam," he said while laughing and putting emphasis on mam. "Well, aren't you guys just so cute? "

"Stop it, or I'm leaving you here if you don't knock it off," you threatened playfully.

"You might as well. It's dead as hell, and we only have a few hours till closing," he suggested with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Are you sure?" He nodded without a second thought. "I'll stay another hour and help you clean, and then I'll go deal?"

"Deal and oh, tell me all about this enemies-to-lovers trope. One day, you're fighting, and the next, you're flirting," he laughs.

"We're not flirting!" You buried your head in your hands, totally embarrassed, but you can't lie. You did want to talk about the little crush you had on heeseung.

☕️.

“Hey, buddy! Did you miss me?” Heeseung giggled, kneeling down and nearly getting pounced on as soon as he offered Mylo his treat. “Yeah, she’s definitely your favorite,” he says, plopping down on his sleeping bag and grabbing his own food from the brown paper bag. “Delicious as always,” he says after the first bite. “Mylo, I think your daddy’s in love,” he smiles to himself, feeling full cause of your kindness alone, and he would definitely cherish this peaceful moment for years to come.

Thanks to your amazing friend and co-worker, Sunghoon, you could go home early once again while he stayed behind and closed up for the night. One of these days, you were definitely gonna have to return the favor.

You took the bus home this time cause you were extra tired that evening. The sun had begun to set, and it was a bit chilly outside, so you were enjoying the warm ride home. You smiled as you passed the bench where you first met heeseung. 

You were lost in thought about your guy's first encounter until you saw something in the corner of your eye. You turned and looked down the alleyway where heeseung stayed. You may or may not have watched him occasionally just to ensure he got home safely.

You smiled and looked a little more closely, hoping to catch a peek at him even though you had already seen him today, but what you saw made your smile drop altogether, and your heart raced with nothing but fear. “Stop the bus!” You screamed to the driver and they immediately halted after hearing your panicked shrill.

You ran out of the bus and down the alleyway without thinking twice about the dangers you might face. “Hey!” You yelled on instinct, gaining the attention of the group of teenagers that you saw from the bus. A few of them stood up and started walking toward you while the others continued to beat heeseung and Mylo. With nothing but fear in your eyes. You quickly pulled out your phone and called the cops. As soon as they saw you with a phone in your hand, they all scattered away. Despite the fear running through your veins, you ran down the alley and saw exactly what you feared. “Are you okay?” You asked him softly and crouched to his level to inspect what they had done to him. Heeseung was balled up on the ground, hugging Mylo so he would take the brunt of the blows.

He flinched when he heard your soft voice, and he slowly peaked up at you, his body still shaking in fear, and his face was barely even recognizable. “I-I’m fine. What are you doing here? You could have gotten hurt,” he scolded you while checking Mylo for any chance of injury. Thankfully, he was able to shield him from most of the brutal assault.

Once he responded coherently to you, you were able to calm yourself, and your heart settled with relief. 

After your initial panic, you noticed you still had your phone in hand. You put the device to your ear and told the operator your exact location, letting them know that someone had been injured.

Heeseung quickly snatched the phone away from you, hanging up immediately. “Are you crazy! Why would you call the police?!”

Your brows raise in shock from the sudden shift of tone in his voice. “I- I thought-“

“Obviously, you didn’t fucking think 'cause now I have to find somewhere else to stay,” he said frantically while trying to pack up his belongings so he could leave before the police came, but he heard all the sirens in the distance, and it was already too late. “I’m fucked” he said weakly and fell down to his knees.

“I’m sorry, I was just trying to help,” you said, and you were confused, not knowing what the harm was with calling the police. You couldn’t let those group of assholes off the hook after what they did to him and Mylo.

“You can help by getting the fuck away from me!” He yelled. Not only was he embarrassed you saw him like this, but he was also injured, sad, and scared for his life.

You were left speechless from his sudden outburst. You didn’t know what you did wrong and you didn’t know what to do, so you slowly got up and walked out of the alleyway, leaving him alone to hopefully cool off and explain what was happening.

The cops surrounded the area, blue and red lights flashed everywhere as you talked to the officers about what happened. Now you know why heeseung mentioned he had to find another place to stay cause once the police found out he was homeless, they practically turned a blind eye to the whole situation and denied your request when you asked them not to give him a fine and not only that, they didn’t even want to treat his wounds which was totally unfair. He was homeless, but he was still a human, and they were treating him like less than.

Unbelievable, you thought. You knew the world was cruel. Sometimes, but this was just too much.

Heeseung held his head low the entire time, and it took every last ounce of strength for him to hold it together when they fined him a hundred dollars for sleeping on owned property, his world felt like it was falling down around him, and everything in the background sounded like high pitched noise as the cops drove away from the scene.

Twenty minutes ago, he was the happiest he’d been in years, and just within a blink of an eye, all that was taken from him.

You went back to heeseung after everything had been concluded, hoping he had calmed down a bit after the incident. “I can pay the fine, heeseung. I’m so sorry. It’s all my fault,” you say dejectedly. “I should have minded my own business. I just wanted to help you.”

He didn’t say a single word to you while packing his bags, even though the sad tone of your voice made his heart ache. It wasn’t your fault he was a homeless loser. If anyone should be apologizing, it should be him, and right now, he’s just upset with himself. He knows he should have never gotten anyone else involved in the shit show he called his life.

Once everything was gathered and stored in his backpack, he stood up, getting ready to make his leave.

Except Mylo had other plans and stayed planted to the pavement. “Mylo, it’s time to go.” heeseung tugged him along like usual, but Mylo resisted.

“Heeseung, I’m sorry,” you apologized again, and you were nearly on the verge of tears cause everything that happened was all your fault. You just wanted to help him, that’s all.

“Mylo!” Heeseung shouted.

“Heeseung, please,” you said softly, hoping he’d at least accept the apology before he left and you never saw him again.

“Just leave me alon- ow fuck!” He whimpered, feeling a sharp pain in his side. Before he could catch his balance, he lost his footing, nearly falling over if it wasn’t for you immediately rushing to his aid and balancing him. He practically collapsed in your arms, and you held him upright, using the brick building next to you for leverage to help him stand. “I’m fine. I don’t need your help,” he cried softly, still trying to walk under his own power, but he stumbled, and once again, your hands were there to catch him, saving him from the fall. “I’m fine,” he said, his voice giving out finally as his entire body succumbed to the pain.

“Shh, it’s okay,” you reassured him and hugged him close to your body. A second didn’t even pass before he had you wrapped tightly in his arms.

“I’m scared,” he cries softly, holding on to you like his life depended on it, and mylo finally sat up, sitting down next you with heeseung as he nudged him gently with his muzzle, sensing his owner’s sadness. “I’m so scared, y/n,” he whispered, leaning into your touch.

A few of your own tears had fallen down your cheek, and you could hear the pain and sorrow in his voice, and it broke your heart to bits to see him like this. “Don’t be. You can stay with me until you find a new place. I don’t mind.” You stroked his hair softly.

“No, no, no, I couldn’t ask that of you.” he shook his head, clutching tighter onto your shirt, terrified to let you go. You holding on to him was the only thing keeping him sane right now.

If he was being this open and vulnerable with you, practically a stranger, then you knew he really must be feeling at his lowest right now, and that’s the last thing you wanted for him cause deep down, you knew there was so much more to him than just a homeless guy that has a hard time accepting kindness.

“You’re not asking; I’m telling.” You dismissed him right away. There was no way you’d let him stay out here another night cause what happened tonight was bad enough, and you weren’t willing to take any chances either cause if something worse happened to him, you don’t know how’d you be able to handle that just the thought made you feel sick. “Are you okay to stand?” You ask him gently once his tears have subsided.

“I think so,” he sniffles while you help him up. “I’m sorry,” he suddenly apologizes.

“Don’t apologize, heeseung. You’ve done nothing wrong. Are you okay to keep going?” You adjusted a little, carrying most of his weight on your shoulder. He nodded weakly, trying his best to assist you despite his bruised ribs and busted face. “My apartment is only a few minutes away. Will you be okay til then? We can take breaks if you need to.”

“I’m okay. I think I can make it,” he surrendered to your offer, too worn down and tired to say no to you. You wrapped his arm around your shoulder, walking him and Mylo to their new home.

You stopped at the door once you arrived. “Don’t be scared, but I have a dog as well, and she can get very excited when she meets new people,” you warn him before entering.

Heeseung smiled a tad bit, wincing when the cut on his lip stretched. “Mylo’s good with the company,” he responds, his voice low and horse, a big contrast to how he sounded earlier in the evening.

“Okay, great!” You welcomed them inside. “Myla, we have visitors!” You cheered, and she was already waiting at the door for you.

“Woah!” She jumped on heeseung immediately. “Ow ow ow,”  he grimaced when she nudged his face. He had no idea when you said you had a dog that you meant a full-grown shepherd almost identical to his own. 

“Myla, sit,” you scolded her, and she sat down on the carpet, showing you the whites of her eyes. “Sorry,” you mumbled.

“It’s fine; she’s just like huge,” he chuckled and coughed immediately after due to the pain in his chest. 

“Take a seat on the couch,” you quickly Instructed. 

“But I’m all bloody and dirty,” he reasoned, unintentionally looking at you with puppy eyes. You just grabbed his hand and led him to the couch.

Meanwhile, Mylo was still frozen by the door. As soon as he saw Myla, he stopped in his tracks, tilting his head to the side, looking confused.

“Go say hi,” you gestured to Myla, and she walked over to Mylo, sniffing him. She recognized his scent immediately and started licking his head, but he just backed away further into the corner, hiding himself.

Heeseung watched Mylo’s odd behavior. He was always great with new dogs, but all of a sudden, he was being standoff-ish. “Mylo,” heeseung said in a stern tone, and Mylo quickly ran over to the couch, hiding behind heeseung. “What has gotten into you, hmm?” Heeseung chuckled, and Mylo peaked around his back to stare at Myla.

You and heeseung both just giggled at his cuteness. “Wait here. I’ll just go and get you some medicine and bandages for your wounds.”

“Thank you.” After a moment, you had gathered everything, and heeseung half smiled once you came back to the living room with all the supplies in hand.

“Come on, boy, you have to sit down so I can heal your daddy’s wounds,” you said sweetly. Mylo obediently laid down on the floor and curled up around your guy's feet. “Gosh,” you said once you turned on the tableside lamp and saw just how badly he was injured.

“That bad, huh?” He laughed dryly. “Imagine I let a bunch of teenagers beat me up,” he said pitifully.

“I don’t know any one man that can fight off four people,” you said, trying to lift his spirits, and it must have worked cause he smiled softly, feeling appreciative of your comforting words as he laid back on the couch so you could do your work. “This is gonna sting, but only for a little while, okay?”

“Okay,” he whispers, already anticipating the sting, and it made him nervous for the pain that was inevitably about to come.

You poured the peroxide on a cotton ball and dabbed at the blood that had started to harden on his cheek and lip.

“Hmm.” He clenched his jaw from the sting, and you noticed his discomfort right away. “Sorry,” you whispered while applying some ointment to his face, hoping it would help take away the sting as you placed a single bandage on the wound. “Does it hurt anywhere else?” You ask once you finished nearly his entire face.

“N-no, I’m fine, thanks,” he lied. It hurt just about everywhere, but he didn’t want to burden you, and he was sure it’d heal on its own anyway, as it always does. He’s taken enough beatings to know.

“Okay, are you hungry or?” He declined once more with a tiny shake of his head. “Well, are you sleepy?” You asked, and he nodded his head. You’re not sure if he was aware of this, but he was pouting, and he looked so cute, just like a little baby. “Wait here.” You patted his knee and got the spare room ready for him.

Heeseung laughed as he watched Mylo digging his nails into the carpet and dragging himself towards Myla.

By the time you came back from blowing up the air mattress and getting a few things set up for heeseung, you came back and saw Myla and Mylo coupled together on the carpet, and it was too freaking adorable how they were already getting along. “I think that’s a good sign” you grinned at the sight.

“I think so, too,” heeseung agreed. It was nice to see Mylo interacting with more of his kind, even if he was behaving a bit strangely. “Myla and Mylo,” heeseung let out an airy laugh as he watched them snuggling up to one another like they’ve known each other for years.

You smiled warmly at him. “So it’s not much, but there’s a bed, and I also have some spare toiletries in the bathroom. Sorry in advance if they all smell like flowers.”

“I like flowers,” he gave you a genuine smile.

“Oh well, good then, I guess that’s it. If you need anything, my room is across from yours. Don’t hesitate at all. Just call me even if I’m asleep, alright?” 

“Okay,” he said quietly and got up from the couch. “Mylo,” he whistled. “Bedtime.” Mylo jumped up and scampered over to Heeseung, following him down the hallway. “Goodnight, y/n. Thanks for all of this. I really mean it.” he wanted to say more, so much more, but the last thing he wanted to do was get emotional again. The first time he cried in front of you was embarrassing enough.

“Of course, goodnight, heeseung.” he gave you a small smile before going into his new room. “This is home, Buddy.” Heeseung kicked off his pants and laid down on the mattress to sleep. “Wow,” he sighed in relief from the feeling of the soft air mattress hitting his back. “I told you we were going to get lucky, boy,” heeseung whispers while hugging Mylo and getting ready to sleep.

You smiled when your face hit your pillow, and you couldn’t have been happier knowing that heeseung and Mylo were together, safe and off the streets, and they could finally rest peacefully.

☕️.

Heeseung had woken up in the middle of the night to the sound of scratching noises. He quickly shot up, alert from the sudden disturbance. He took in his surroundings, breathing a deep sigh of relief once he realized he was safe at your apartment and didn’t have to worry about being assaulted again.

He heard the scratching noise again and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Mylo was digging on the door and probably scraping the paint with his claws. “Cut that out!” Heeseung whispered shouted and got out of bed, putting his pants on and quietly opening his door, assuming Mylo needed a bathroom break. “Come on, it’s this way,” Heeseung tiredly mutters while Mylo is busy sniffing the bottom of your bedroom door.

You stirred from your sleep when you felt Myla jumping off the bed. She looked back at you, wagging her tail and waiting at the door for you. “Gotta go potty?” You grabbed your robe and tossed it on, yawning before opening the door. “Woah,” You jumped slightly when you saw heeseung and Mylo standing right outside your door.

“Sorry,” Heeseung whispered.

“Hey, it's not your fault Myla has to use the bathroom,” you assured him.

“Same with him,” heeseung chuckled, pointing at Mylo.

You both shut your bedroom doors and walked to the front door, but neither of the two moved from their spot.

You and heeseung made eye contact, a knowing look taking over both your features. “Sorry,” heeseung mumbled, feeling like it was his fault for the disturbance.

“Stop apologizing,” you chuckled. “It’s alright.”

“Sorry- I- okay.” he dropped his shoulders and sighed.

“So I guess we can both agree that we’ve lost our sleeping partners.” You say, watching the two of them nuzzling each other.

“Guess so,” Heeseung laughs softly. Mylo and Myla lay next to each other on the ground, and clearly, they weren’t going to leave each other's side tonight. “Goodnight, y/n,” heeseung mutters as he goes back to his room.

“Night, heeseung,” you smiled and shut your door behind you, hoping to get a good night's rest after everything that happened today.

☕️.

Finally, you were both able to rest through the night after the disturbance. You had a day off today, which was perfect cause heeseung wouldn’t be alone on his first day with you. You didn’t have much on your to-do list, so maybe you could do something later, like shopping or getting some food for dinner with him if he was feeling up to it.

You did your usual routine, fed both the dogs, and then made a small breakfast for yourself. You didn’t want to cook anything for heeseung cause you were not sure what time he would wake up, and you didn’t want it to be cold, so you waited til later for him.

Except later came, and it was about four in the afternoon, and still, no sign of heeseung. You assumed he was just really worn out, so you took the dogs for a walk, but not before leaving a note in case heeseung woke up before you got back. The last thing you wanted was for him to worry about Mylo's whereabouts.

After half an hour, you came back from the dog park, and heeseung was still nowhere in sight. You spent the rest of the day playing with the dogs and watching TV. Before you knew it, the day was already over. It was midnight, and heeseung never showed. You cracked the door and checked on him before you went to sleep just to make sure he was okay, and you smiled to yourself. He was more than okay; he was still sleeping very very soundly.

You pouted slightly cause you were excited to see him today, but if he was that tired, you wanted to give him time to rest. After all, he needed it. You just hoped his bandages would hold until the next morning.

☕️.

The next week went by like this, except you knew that he came out of his room when you saw your strawberry shampoo spilled on the tub floor and his old clothes folded neatly near the laundry basket, not to mention the missing ramen in your cupboard.

Heeseung was horrified to step out of his room and face you. The first night was okay, but after things settled in, he couldn’t help but be embarrassed by how he treated you when you tried to help him and how he broke down like a newborn baby crying in your arms. “What the hell were you thinking?” He said to himself out loud in his room. “Ow,” he whimpered in pain when he turned on his side in bed; he lifted up his shirt, and if he wasn’t mistaken, his wounds had gotten infected badly. There was pus oozing from them, and they felt worse than the day he got them. He was applying the ointment you gave him every day, but it wasn’t working. Little did he know he needed a lot more than ointment for his level of injuries.

He got up out of bed and hobbled onto the bathroom to get more ointment. To his luck, or maybe not to his luck, you had just gotten home from work and caught him in the doorway. He thought about scattering on back to his room, but it’d look very obvious that he was trying to avoid you if he did that, so he just greeted you politely before going into the washroom. “Hi,” he whispers.

“Hey!” You said happily cause he was finally up and awake. “Feeling any better?” You asked, hoping to hear a positive response to your question.

“Umm… yeah,” he said, a bit unsure, and he was unaware that he was holding his side, a clear sign to you that he was still in pain.

“Does it still hurt there?” You looked down to where he was holding, a small pout making its way to your lips.

“Yeah, but I think it’s getting better.” Once again, he lied so you wouldn’t be caused any inconvenience because of him.

“Here, let me take a look. Umm, do you mind if I just lift this up a bit?” He shook his head as a no, you proceeded to peel back the shirt, and he bit his lip to conceal the pained sound that was dying to escape when the material of his shirt brushed against his wound.

“Am I all good?” He asked once he saw you blankly staring at the area where he was still badly hurt.

“Go wait in your room for me, okay?” You couldn’t help the sound of disappointment in your voice. Your tone let him know the seriousness of the situation, and he nodded his head, doing as he was told like a little kid being scolded.

You came in a few minutes later with your hands full of all types of first aid supplies. You sat down next to him, breaking the silence as you shyly instructed him to lift up his shirt.

He nodded again and lifted up his shirt, revealing the angry, infected welts on his skin. There was more than you had originally seen, even more on his lower abdomen and upper back. “Umm, I can’t really, you know, reach all the spots if you don’t..” your words faded out towards the end in hopes he would understand what you meant and not make the situation awkward, but he just stared at you blankly, obviously not understanding what you meant. “The shirt you need to uhh,” you motioned for him to take his shirt off, and his eyes automatically went wide; nevertheless, he complied and took off the article of clothing. “Why didn’t you tell me about this?” You asked with a sigh, looking at all the swollen cuts on his body.

“I didn’t want to burden you with my problems,” he mumbled.

“Well, for as long as you stay with me, your problems are my problems.” The room fell silent once again. What else could he say to that? He sat still while you cleaned his wounds. Luckily for him, it wasn’t bad enough to go to the emergency room, but if he waited a few days longer, you don’t know what would have happened.

He hissed in pain when the peroxide bubbled around one of the many wounds covering his frail body. “Sorry,” you blew on the area to make it feel better. “You’re doing so good,” you told him when it got to some of the really bad areas. “Just a little more,” you whisper while cleaning up the rest of the cuts. “Now, is there anything else you want to tell me?” You look at him with a skeptical raise of your brow.

He gulped and turned to look at you. “N-no,” he stuttered just like last time, which was a good indicator that he was not telling you the truth this time either.

“Heeseung,” you said his name in a warning tone. “If you’re hurt somewhere else and it goes untreated, it could get very bad, and you’re not a burden to me at all, okay? I offered, so let me take care of you, yeah?” 

☕️.

This was probably the most unintentionally awkward thing you have ever done, and despite focusing on the task at hand, it was hard to focus when he was in nothing but his underwear while you treated the wounds on his thighs. “Ow,” he flinched from the burning sensation of the disinfectant, and you rubbed his thigh softly, trying to distract him from the pain; he tensed up at the contact but quickly relaxed under your careful touch. 

“Sorry, I’m almost done.” He leaned back on his palms, head tilting back while he grimaced in pain.

“A-ah, o-okay,” his breath shudders the moment you apply more ointment to his thigh.

“There, all done,” you finally finished and wrapped his legs up successfully, as well as his upper body.

“Thank you so much.” he threw his head back, exhaling deeply. That was probably the hardest thing he’d done in a while. The pain he felt was literally excruciating.

He reached for his shirt, unknowingly leaning into you a bit. Your breath hitched in your throat at the proximity, and now you were only a mere few inches away from each other.

He held his breath while staring at you, his eyes flickering between your eyes and lips before he caught himself and looked away, clearing his throat softly. “Uhm” 

The air was already awkward, but now there was a certain tension circulating. It felt stuffy, and you could barely even breathe it in. “I-I’ll let you get dressed.” You turned away from him, too flustered to look at him any longer.

You’re shocked you even had the composure for those words to come out coherently.

You felt bad for even thinking like this while he was injured, but you couldn’t help but notice that he was even more handsome up close.

“Yeah,” he breathed out as you walked to the door, fumbling with all the supplies you had in hand. 

“Just come down for breakfast soon, okay?” you say while grabbing the door knob and excusing yourself.

“I will,” his voice comes out soft as you shut the door, leaning against it and clutching your beating heart.

You felt like squealing. How were you going to be able to handle living with him?

☕️.

“Breakfast,” heeseung said as he paced back and forth. “Breakfast?” The last time he had breakfast was heck if he knew. He hadn’t even sat at a dining table since he was a young teenager. “Breakfast.” While he was pacing, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. His hair was a mess, and his face was scruffy. “Eww,” he mumbled while running his fingers through the strands of his hair, looking back at his disgusting appearance.

At some point, he was able to gather the courage to leave his room or technically your room and go to the kitchen, where he could smell the bacon you were cooking. 

Your back was turned to him, and he opened his mouth to say something, but he closed it before anything could come out. He stood there awkwardly for a few moments and shoved his hands inside his pockets. “H-hi,” he greeted and teetered himself back and forth on the balls of his feet.

“Oh, hi!” You whipped your head around at the sound of his voice and smiled at him. “You’re just in time. Have a seat.”

He took out a chair and sat down while you finished making him the tasteless black coffee that he always seemed to enjoy, or maybe it was just cause it was the cheapest thing on the menu.

“Here you are,” you said softly as you served him his food. 

“Last time I’ve had this much food was more than eight years ago,” he said while looking at the piled-up plate before him. 

You frowned upon hearing that cause that probably meant he had been homeless or at least struggling for a good amount of years, and knowing that made you sad.

He took note of your sad expression and quickly changed the topic so he wouldn’t sour the mood any more than he already had. “Sorry,” he whispered. “Thank you” 

“It’s okay, and you’re welcome,” you smiled. “Mylo’s just out in the front playing with Myla,” you told him as you took a seat at the table with him.

“You’re not eating?” He asked as he took a bite of bacon, a satisfied hum coming from the taste. Home-cooked breakfast has always been his favorite.

“No, it’s like 7:00pm,” you said while giggling.

He lowered his head in pure embarrassment, a shy smile playing on his lips. “Right,” he chuckled, only now realizing just how late he had slept in.

You watched him eat in silence with a smile, and it warmed your heart to see him eating and enjoying the food you made just for him.

He took a break from eating before speaking again. “After my infection goes down, I’ll find a new place to stay and get Mylo and me out of your hair. He’s a pain in the butt, and I’m not much better off,” he informs and takes a sip of coffee.

“Would you like some cream for your coffee?” You ignored his comment entirely cause you weren’t letting him go back out on the street, and that was final.

“Y/n-“

“Yes? Okay then,” You smiled and got up from the table, grabbing some coffee creamer.

He sighed softly while you added some personality to his hot beverage. “Thanks, but I really don’t need all this. I appreciate it, I really do, but I don’t want to bother you.”

“Do I look bothered? I’ve cleaned your wounds without complaint. It’s my pleasure to cook for you. Myla loves the extra company, and so do I, so what seems to be the issue with you staying here” You fold your arms on the table and wait for a response. You weren’t trying to sound so rude, but you were adamant about him staying because it wasn’t safe for him out there, and anytime the thought of him leaving crept up in your mind, you couldn’t help but feel agitated.

When you put it like that, it didn’t sound bad at all, but he just felt like a burden. Maybe it was because of his terrible upbringing, where he was told that everything was his fault and the world would be a better place without him in it. He doesn’t know, but still, he just didn’t feel right accepting your hospitality. “I’m sorry, but I can’t,” he politely refused.

You sighed. You didn’t want to be rude, so you excused yourself. “I’ll go check on the dogs,” you said quietly and left the table.

Heeseung lowered his head and sighed deeply. He didn’t want you to be upset with him or displeased or whatever you were, but he wasn’t your problem to solve. He needed to do better by himself for himself, not freeload off your kindness.

☕️.

Heeseung has been staying with you for a few weeks now. His wounds almost cleared up completely after he let you treat them daily. Although it was like pulling teeth, you managed to get it done, and by some type of magic, you were able to convince him to let you take him shopping. “So what all do you need?” You asked once you pulled out a shopping cart.

“Umm, toiletries?” He scratched his nape, staying close to your side like a child would his mother.

You smiled and nodded, leading him to the health and beauty section.

You stopped at the end of the aisle, and he stood next to you, not moving a single inch. Even though you were waiting for him to lead the way, you cut your eyes at him, and he was still frozen there, just like a statue, so you cleared your throat. “Umm, you can get anything you need.”

“Oh!” He made a face of realization as he went to pick out items before you could notice the embarrassed blush on his face.

You stayed at the end of the aisle, and he came back like two seconds later with a trial-size toothbrush and toothpaste that cost $1,09

“Really? That’s all you need.” You look at the single item in his hand, trying your best not to judge his choice in necessities, but you can’t help it.

“Yup,” he replied, dropping his item in the cart.

You sighed. This was going to be a long day.

You went down the aisle with him this time, helping him pick out some things he needed that weren’t travel-size. “Let’s see…” you hummed. “You need this, this, and this.” You grabbed a full-sized tube of toothpaste, a toothbrush, and a bottle of mouthwash. “And these also,” you say, adding some toothflossers. “What next?”

“Some body wash, maybe I don’t know,” he mumbles out, playing with his fingers out of uneasiness when he sees the prices of everything you had just dropped in the cart.

“Okay, let’s go” Once you get down the body wash aisle, you nearly groan in annoyance when he bought a three-in-one after smelling more than ten different body washes.

You knew he liked the $10,00 dollar bottle cause the way his eyes lit up when he smelled it, but of course, he chose the two-dollar bottle cause it was cheap. Not to say there was a problem with being frugal. It’s just he didn’t need to be on a budget when he was with you.

You took the three in one out of the cart and put it back on the shelf, grabbing the one he really wanted. “I-“

“Heeseung,” you stood in front of him, hands gripping his shoulders as you gave him a serious talk. “Money isn’t an issue. Just pick whatever you want without a thought.” he nodded at you, eyes blinking rapidly as he hung on to every single last word that you had said to him. “So from now on, just get anything you want, okay?” You didn’t want to force anything upon him cause you knew spending this type of money wasn’t an everyday occurrence for him, but you hoped he’d get used to the idea of it because he deserved to shop like everyone else even if it was new to him.

“Okay,” he said softly.

Finally, you thought to yourself now that he had taken the initiative to lead you around the store to do some shopping of his own, and it was refreshing to see him adding all different types of stuff to the cart without checking the price tag. “I could also use a razor,” he said while rubbing the little scruff on his chin.

“Razors are this way.” You chuckled lightly and guided him to the shaving section. He followed you and picked out a razor and shave cream. “Does this one smell okay?” He showed you the aftershave he was thinking about getting.

“Hmm,” you hummed in agreement. “It suits you. You’re going to get all the ladies,” you joked, and he chuckled.

“All the homeless ladies on the block.” Your mood instantly shifted the moment he mentioned that. You didn’t want to think about him leaving in a week. You didn’t want to think about him being homeless again. He had only been staying with you for a few weeks, and now he was already leaving soon.

You were definitely going to miss him.

Living alone wasn’t easy for you. That’s why you had gotten Myla in the first place, and as much as she cheered you up, there was nothing like having the company of another human. You’d invite Sunghoon occasionally, but he was always too busy with school, plus his relationship, so it had just been you and Myla for years.

But now that heeseung was staying with you, that loneliness was gone, unfortunately for you, though it would only be temporary.

“Anything else?” You muttered sadly, which went completely unnoticed by him.

“Some new clothes would be nice,” he says enthusiastically.

“Okay,” You took him to the men’s section for clothing, your feet suddenly feeling heavier as a feeling of dread set in your stomach.

You unintentionally spaced out while he was shopping for his clothes. The thought of him not being around anymore was really getting to you, and you didn’t even know why it was bothering you this much.

“Y/n?” He called you, but you didn’t answer. “Y/n?” He repeated, this time turning around to catch your attention.

“Hmm?” You snap back to reality, noticing a questioning look on his face.

“Are you feeling sleepy?” He inquired with a hint of concern. “If you are, we can go.”

“No, I was just thinking about something,” you told him truthfully. You did have a day off today, so you felt good. You weren’t feeling sleepy at all. You assumed he took your saddened state for you being tired, but you were feeling okay.

“Okay,” he smiled, but you could tell that he was trying to hurry by the way he was sifting through the clothes rack. After a few moments, he had finished getting everything, which consisted of a few shirts and a couple pairs of joggers. “Okay, I’m done. That’s everything.” he clasps his hands together.

“Are you sure?” you reply, just to be completely sure he doesn’t need anything else.

“Oh, umm,” he was more than a little embarrassed about saying it to you, but it just dawned on him that he needed some new underwear. “I uhh need. I mean, never mind,” he concluded, not being able to bring himself to say it in front of you. For some reason, he just felt extremely shy suddenly, which was weird because you had seen him in his underwear already, but this felt different.

“Come on, what is it?” you urged him to tell you you’re sure he was just worried about the bill, but it was okay.

“It’s really nothing,” he gulped and avoided eye contact with you, hoping you wouldn’t ask again.

“Don’t worry about the cost. I have it, alright?” You patted his shoulder, assuring him it was okay to add more to the cart.

“It’s fine, let’s go.” he started walking away from the men’s clothing and heading to the checkout.

“Heeseung, come back and just tell me what it is,” you insisted.

“The dogs are probably getting hot in the car. We should probably leave.” he gave a reason as to why you guys should leave.

“Well, you should probably tell me otherwise they’ll be in the car all day.” You knew that was a threat, but you didn’t care. If he needed something else, he was going to get it.

He walked back over to you, finally giving in to your hardheadedness. “Ineedsomenewunderwear,” he quickly rushed out, blush already creeping up his neck.

“What?” You asked, your brows creasing in confusion. You couldn’t make out a single word he had just said to you.

He cupped his hand around his mouth, leaning in your ear and whispering it to you like it was top secret. “I said I need some new underwear.” he leaned back, a wide-eyed expression on his face as you realized what he said loud and clear word for word.

“Oh….ohhhhhhhh,” you laughed awkwardly. “I’ll just be over here,” you said and gave him some space to search for some underwear. “Sorry”

“Thank you,” he mutters shyly.

“Gosh,” you dropped your head in embarrassment once you got far enough away from him. You didn’t mean to pressure him into telling you like that. You weren’t trying to make him uncomfortable; you just wanted to make sure he got everything he needed.

Around five minutes later, Heeseung finished, and you went to the checkout area with him trailing behind you like you were his protector or something, but you thought it was cute.

Once again, you caught him looking at something, and you followed his line of sight. He was looking at the candy on the check lanes, which you thought was adorable, but that’s all he did. He just looked and looked away. 

It’s been ages since he had any candy, but it wasn’t a necessity, so he didn’t buy it. That’s what his stepmom always told him: if he didn’t need it, he shouldn’t buy it.

Well, little did he know you didn’t think like his stepmom, and if he wanted candy, then he was going to get it. “Pick all you want.” 

He now knew better than to fight with you, so he just put what he wanted into the cart, and you smiled that he was finally understanding that it was okay to buy things for himself.

After checking out, you two got back into the car, making a split decision to stop at the pet shop since you had a second mouth to feed. Mylo had already eaten nearly all of Myla's food.

As soon as you and heeseung entered the store, you were getting multiple compliments on how adorable the dogs were, and other people were politely smiling at the two of you while you roamed the shelves.

You bought a lot of stuff, probably too much stuff, but if Myla liked one thing, it was toys, and she just had a habit of destroying one after the other, so you’d be down to a few toys in no time.

Heeseung picked out some of Mylo’s favorites and let him pick out a few new toys as well. more like him picking them up and slobbering all over them, leaving heeseung no choice but to pick those. It’s been years since Mylo had a real toy. Heeseung had made him a makeshift toy out of a sock and shoestring, but that was nowhere near as fancy as the ones that the store had, especially the ones that squeaked. After shopping, you both continued to the register, where the cashier gave you two endless compliments. “Since you’re such a sweet couple, I tossed in a few dog bones as well,” the worker winked playfully as you and heeseung thanked her shyly, neither of you bothering to correct her before leaving the store after spending a couple hundred dollars, nearly making heeseung’s eyes pop out of their sockets.

Heeseung literally blushed the whole car ride home after that compliment the cashier gave you two, and thankfully, you didn’t notice his fidgeting in the passenger seat. It’s just that he’s never had a girlfriend or a girl that was even interested in him, so when he heard what the cashier said, he couldn’t help but entertain the thought of being your boyfriend a little.

 Or maybe a lot.

You weren’t much better off. You didn’t notice him fidgeting cause you were fidgeting for the same exact reason. You even went as far as to make up scenarios of you and him together in your head until you pulled into your driveway.

You hoped that wasn’t weird.

You, heeseung, and the dogs arrived home safely, and you entered the apartment together, hands full of groceries. Heeseung speaks up after sitting down the grocery bags that he insisted on carrying most of despite being a bit sore still. “I’m gonna wash up before dinner,” he said to you while you put some of the food items in the fridge.

You hummed in acknowledgment, leaving out the items you were going to make dinner with.

While heeseung was in the shower, he shaved off all of his facial hair. It’s been ages since his face had felt so smooth; the warm water cascading down his back felt like heaven on earth, and he didn’t take one bit of this for granted. He relished every last second using everything you bought him to freshen up with. When his shower came to an end, he stepped out, and he could have cried at the appearance that stared back at him in the mirror. Now, that’s a face that looked recognizable. He definitely grew up, but behind it all, he was still just that little boy who ran away from home all those years ago. He smiled at his reflection, but there was just one little thing that was missing.

As soon as the thought popped into his mind, he spotted a pair of scissors on your bathroom counter, and without a second thought, he trimmed his hair way down.

He definitely wasn’t the best at it, but he was good enough to make himself look presentable. Being homeless forces you to learn a lot of things most people take for granted, and haircuts just happened to be one of the many things he learned while being out on the road for so long.

He combed his fingers through his hair, completely satisfied with his new look. He felt lighter and overall better than he had in years. He changed into the new joggers he/you had bought and a plain black shirt before coming back out to the living room.

“Are you always this on tim-“ your words got stuck in your throat when you turned around and saw him looking like a completely new man. You knew he was handsome under the scruff and overgrown hair, but you didn’t realize that he was that handsome, and to be honest, you had lost your train of thought entirely.

He noticed your stare, but he was far too self-conscious about his appearance to understand that you were actually checking him out and not judging him. “I-I think I got a size too big,” he laughs nervously. He was never that beefy of a guy, but there was a point where he was way more nourished than he is now.

His voice brought you back to reality. “No, no, it’s good. It fits just fine,” you assured him and turned your back to the stove so he wouldn’t see your flustered face.

Your answer makes him smile, and he went from feeling self-conscious to confident just like that.

Dinner was a lot less awkward than your first breakfast together, and you could slowly see yourself getting used to something like this. Of course not with heeseung cause he was leaving, but maybe someday soon you’d find a boyfriend, and he’d eventually move in with you, or you'd move in with him, but that was all just wishful thinking you hadn’t had a man ask you out or for your number since high school, and unfortunately you had to reject it cause you were just too busy with studies at that time.

Little did you know while you were lost in thought, Heeseung had been full-on shamelessly checking you out every chance he got, but he didn’t think much of it. He assumed it was because he hadn’t had any interaction with a women in so long, but even when he was around girls at school, he’s never paid attention to them the way he did you, but you were a different story. You were literally an angel from the first time he met you till now, and how could he not be attracted to such a sweet girl who was beautiful not just on the outside but on the inside as well. A huge plus was you having a shepherd, too. He thought that it was so adorable.

Perfect for him.

He’d, of course, never act on it, though, cause as he saw it, he just stumbled across an angel to help him get through a hard time for now, and then he’d be back on his way to fending for himself and living the only life that he knew how.

After dinner, you both said shy goodnights to each other before you headed to bed. Mylo and Myla had snuggled up to each other about an hour ago. From the looks of it, they wouldn’t be moving anytime soon, and since you and heeseung were two bleeding hearts, neither of you could separate them, so they peacefully slept in the living room together all night.

☕️.

The last week of his stay flew by. You and heeseung hung out a bunch after he had gotten more comfortable around you, so comfortable that when you came home from work, you saw him spread out all over the couch with Mylo on his chest and the TV on.

He must have been sleepy, you thought, but you didn’t mind him sleeping on your couch cause he needed the rest. You put a blanket on him and muttered a small goodnight before leaving the two alone for the first time since they got here. You finally got to sleep with Myla again. She had grown quite fond of Mylo, and now they were nearly inseparable, which warmed your heart, but it just hurt knowing that this would all come to an end so soon.

☕️.

And end it did.

Heeseung was leaving today, and despite spending the whole day with him, going out for ice cream playing at the dog park, and even having dinner together, you were still gonna miss him and Mylo with your whole heart.

“So I guess that’s everything,” heeseung said once he finished packing his new backpack courtesy of you.

“I guess so,” you fake smiled at him as he walked over to your door, readjusting his backpack on his shoulders. 

“Umm, c-can I ask you for one last huge favor?” He questioned once he and Mylo stopped at your front door.

“Yeah,” you breathe out while fighting back your tears. 

“Can I please have a hug?” He asked with a forced smile of his own. It hurt him like crazy to leave, but he didn’t want to ride on your coattail any longer than he had to. He was all healed up and had more than enough supplies to go it alone, plus you had even given him a hundred dollars even though he refused it five times before finally giving in.

“Of course.” You swallowed the lump in your throat and wrapped your arms around him, inhaling the scent of his aftershave one last time.

“Thank you for everything, y/n. You’re really a great person, and I’m so glad I met you. These past few weeks were so much fun.” his voice nearly cracked, but he fought it off along with the tears that threatened to spill out as he tightened his grip on you before letting go. He released one last breath as his hands rested on your shoulders before dropping down to his sides.

“My pleasure!” You replied with only a few words cause if you didn’t, you knew you would start balling your eyes out like a newborn baby.

“Come on, Mylo, say bye-bye,” heeseung tugged on his leash like he always did, and Mylo rubbed himself against your leg. “Bye, y/n,” heeseung said before turning to the door so you wouldn’t see his tears starting to roll down his cheeks.

“Bye, heeseung,” you said in the softest tone. He could tell you were getting emotional, too, and he had to get out at that exact moment cause if he didn’t, he was sure he’d never gain the strength to leave.

He left despite Mylo resisting when he was being separated from his new best friend. Heeseung shut the door without looking back and walked down the steps while Mylo kept trying to fight his way back inside your apartment, clawing at the door until he was panting due to exhaustion. “Come on, Mylo, it’s this way,” heeseung mumbled and finally broke down, letting his tears fall cause he just couldn’t hold them in anymore.

Myla was digging at the door after it shut, and you weakly sat next to her on the ground, balling your eyes out just like you knew you would when heeseung left. 

Myla continued to whimper at the door, waiting for Mylo’s return, but it never came, and she curled up next to you where you had sat down on the floor after heeseung left. You cried and cried until you had no more tears left. It hurt far more than you had ever imagined it would.

You couldn’t believe it was actually over. It felt like just yesterday you were cleaning his wounds, and now he’s walking out your door, walking out of your life for good.

☕️.

After heeseung’s departure, he walked and walked and walked some more until he found a new spot he thought was suitable. He had gotten everything all laid out, setting up the new area and trying to replicate what he had when he was with you, but it just wasn’t the same.

“Well, it’s just you and me again, Buddy,” heeseung said to Mylo as they sat down in yet another alleyway. It definitely wasn’t as closed off from the street as his old spot, but he didn’t have a choice. It’d have to do. “Our new home,” he patted Mylo on the head, but of course, he wasn’t his usual cheery self. “You already miss myla, huh?” Mylo’s ear perked up at just the sound of her name. “Me too,” heeseung chuckled sadly. “And I miss her mommy.”

He flopped down on his sleeping bag, attempting to sleep the sadness away, but he just couldn’t get comfortable—no matter the position or how many times he tossed and turned. After sleeping on the bed, you had given him. It was hard to go back to sleeping on the cold hard ground.

But eventually, he grew so tired that his eyes had no choice but to flutter shut, and his shivering body succumbed to sleep. 

When the morning came, he tried to get up and do his normal routine, but the drive just wasn’t there like it used to be. He sat in bed feeling unmotivated and miserable all day. It had only been a few hours since he left, and he already couldn’t stand it.

He was cold, his body ached, the smell of your bacon wasn’t filling his nostrils, and the idea of being found by that same group of teenagers wasn’t helping his current situation at all.

He’s been doing this his whole life, so why now was it so hard? How come after meeting you and Myla, his life changed so drastically? How come after being alone for so long that, he suddenly craved your care and hospitality more than anything in the world.

Suddenly, his train of thought was broken when he felt warm tears rolling down his cheeks. He didn’t even know when he had started crying; nevertheless, he tucked himself into a ball and buried his head in his sleeping bag. No matter how positive he tried to be, he couldn’t help but think about the fact that he was probably going to live the rest of his life out on the street without ever seeing you again.

He started to reminisce about the first day you two met and how he treated you so harshly but soon opened up to you after seeing how kind you were. He thought about all the food you bought him, all the money you gave him, how nice you were to his precious Mylo when you didn’t even know him.

He remembers going shopping with you, and the laugh he let out was bittersweet as he remembered the little underwear incident.

Good times.

Heeseung thought of himself as the black coffee he always used to drink before you came into his life. You swooped in and managed to brighten up his bland beverage with cream, turning the dull, uninteresting liquid into something colorful and delicious, and that’s exactly what you did to him. You took his old, meaningless life and made it worth living.

It’s quite a funny analogy, but you were like the cream to his coffee.

☕️.

You took vacation the day after heeseung left cause you were in no shape or form to function at your job. You didn’t even want to get out of bed, and Myla seemed so lonely when Mylo left that you couldn’t find it in your heart to leave her alone.

For the whole day, you ate comfort food and curled up on the couch cause you were in no mood to cook, nor did you have the energy to.

Myla didn’t even eat. She spent her time moping around the house, looking for Mylo. You assumed when she had no luck, she laid down in the twin dog bed she and Mylo always used to share. You supposed his scent still lingered there by the way she was sniffing it. 

Even though he had just left, it felt like time seemed to go by as slowly as humanly possible, and with each minute that passed, the absence of heeseung brightening up your living space was crushing you inside more and more.

The reality of him being gone hit even harder in the morning when he wasn’t there to join you for breakfast.

When he wasn’t there to take the dogs for a walk.

When the smell of his aftershave wasn’t lingering in the air.

When he wasn’t cuddled up on the couch with the two dogs while you were cooking.

You know you shouldn’t have done it, but you stood from the couch, your feet leading you straight to the spare room he used to stay in. You twisted the knob taking a peek inside, just to see it completely empty, and your heart sank cause for some reason. You thought maybe, just maybe, this was all a nightmare, and he might still be there sleeping peacefully on your air mattress.

☕️.

The weekend had rolled around, and only a few days had passed since heeseung decided to go it alone. It was three in the morning, yet he found himself standing outside on your doorstep. 

About an hour ago, he had already packed up all his stuff and made the journey back to your apartment. He’d been cussed out, people threw trash at him, and to top it all off, it had started to rain, and he just couldn’t take anymore.

He now knows why he couldn’t go back to the life he used to live after he left your place. It's because after having some normalcy for once, he saw just how messed up his life had truly been being homeless and on the streets. Before you, he had absolutely nothing to compare it to, but after spending time with you, his eyes were opened. He realized that the things he’d been searching so desperately for his whole life were waiting for him behind the walls of your apartment, and he didn’t hesitate to walk an entire hour back to your home.

Heeseung took a deep breath at your door before knocking. He knew the hour was nothing but ungodly, but if he had spent another night alone, he would have lost himself out there.

You had passed out on the couch some hours ago after eating carelessly and drinking beer all night, a new daily routine of yours ever since heeseung left.

You popped up out of your sleep when you heard a knock on the door. After your eyes somewhat adjusted, you looked at the time and couldn’t help but feel startled because who the heck would be at your door this late at night? It’s not like you knew anybody in this area and you hadn’t ordered anything.

You got up quietly, tiptoeing to look through the peephole, and you thought your eyes were deceiving you, so you rubbed the sleep from them, blinking a few times before taking another look, and there stood heeseung covered in the rain at your doorstep.

Your eyes weren’t deceiving you.

You backed away from the door in pure shock, a hand covering your mouth as your eyes watered. You couldn’t believe he was actually back.

When heeseung got no answer, he couldn’t help but lose hope, his shoulders slumping in defeat, but he has never been the give-up type, and he wouldn’t start now, so he decided to knock one last time before calling it quits cause if you were asleep, he didn’t want to disturb you at this hour.

You opened the latch and the door to be greeted by heeseung smiling at you with a drenched and panting Mylo sitting next to him. “Hi, y/n,” he said softly, and just at the sight of your face, his smile dropped, and he broke down in tears just like the day you let him stay with you. “I don’t think I can take being alone anymore.” he buried his head in the crook of your neck and clung to you like you were his lifeline.

You instantly hugged him back, not caring about your clothes being soaked by his wet ones. He was shaking, and his cheek that was pressed up against yours was cold as ice. “It’s okay. You’re here with me now. You’ll never be alone again,” you told him and patted his back softly as you warmed him up in your embrace, tears pricking your eyes at his current state.

Mylo quickly ran over to Myla, his leash dragging against the carpet. As the two reconnected, she licked the raindrops off his face while he licked hers.

You pushed the door closed behind him and guided him to the couch. His hold on you tightened just in case you tried to let him go. “I’m sorry, I-it’s just I have nowhere to go. I have no one to turn to and no one who loves me,” he sobbed quietly and opened up to you in his state of desperation. “No one to take care of me, no one to hold me. It’s just been me all by myself for years, and I just can’t do it anymore. Since I met you. I don’t want to live the way I used to.” he paused. Trying to collect his breath but failing due to the sheer amount of emotions flowing through him. “My step-parents abused me when I was little, and I ran away, and since then, it’s just been me and Mylo, and I just can’t.” he was all over the place, but you were able to piece together everything, and he completely broke down in your arms letting out the most painful sobs you’d ever heard. “I’m tired, I’m just so tired,” he sighed into your chest, entirely exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally.

“Shh,” you stroked his head softly to calm him down. “You don’t have to do it alone anymore. Just let me help you. Let me take care of you, and when you get tired, you can rest cause no matter what, I’ll always be here when you need me,” you assured him, trying to keep it together yourself cause this was all very nerve-racking for you as well to profess such care and promise all these things to him, but no matter how nerve-racking it was you knew that your words were coming from your heart and deep down you knew you could fulfill every last one.

“D-do you really mean that? You won’t ever leave me like my parents did, will you?” He asked, and he almost sounded desperate for any type of affirmation at this point, desperate to be cared for by someone.

“Look at me.” You cupped his face in your hands, his cheeks still cold to the touch, his soft brown eyes staring into your own. “I’ll never leave you, and that’s a promise.” Your body acted on its own, and you kissed his cheek softly; his eyes twinkled shut, his breathing almost evening out the moment your soft lips touched his cheek, melting all the cold away with your warmth.

You both held each other in silence for at least twenty minutes before breaking apart after he had warmed all up. “You okay now?” You asked tenderly while stroking his back.

“Yeah, I think so,” he whispered. “I’m sorry for this.” he glanced at the wet couch. “I’m sorry for coming so late.”

“Don’t worry, let’s get you cleaned up yeah?” he reluctantly released you from his grip, and you led him to the bathroom.

You stood outside the door while he undressed himself. He handed you his wet clothes, and he stepped into the shower, washing away all his trials from the past few days.

You put the discarded laundry in the washer machine while you waited for him to finish.

When he came from the bathroom, he looked much better despite his tired, swollen eyes, and you assumed all he wanted was to sleep after everything that’s happened. You informed him that you would also be taking a shower, and he nodded in response, still looking a bit shaken from the whole experience.

After your shower, you entered the living room, and heeseung was still sitting on the couch, staring blankly at the wall. “Heeseung,” you whispered his name, and he jumped in response, making you frown. You wondered just how much he had endured out there, but that was a conversation for a different time. “Time for bed.” You grabbed his hand gently and led him to your room instead of letting him sleep alone tonight. It just wasn’t sitting right with you, especially cause he looked so broken and out of it.

“A-are you sure?” He asked when you patted a spot on the bed for him.

“Positive” This time, he really didn’t fight you cause even if it was just for tonight, he didn’t want to go to sleep alone again.

He got under the covers with you and maintained a good distance until you tugged his body towards yourself and wrapped your arms around him. After feeling your warmth, he immediately hugged you back and tangled his limbs with yours, holding you like you were his personal giant stuffed teddy bear, and you smiled softly at the innocent, childlike gesture.

You slowly stroked his back, and not even a minute later, he was passed out in your arms. Your heart swelled at the sight of him sleeping so soundly. You put your head on his chest to get comfortable, inhaling his refreshing aftershave while you fell asleep to the steady rhythm of his calming heartbeat and his comforting warmth.

☕️.

Heeseung woke up next to you, snuggling closer to you, a habit he had with Mylo every morning. “Good morning, Mylo,” he whispered. Usually, he’d be getting his morning love from Mylo by now, but when he didn’t feel licks and slobber on his face, the embarrassing reality of what he was actually doing washed over him. 

He slowly opened his eyes and saw you sleeping next to him, and he squeezed his eyes back shut.

How could I have forgotten I went to bed with her last night? He thought to himself.

Well, at least you were still sleeping and didn’t hear him embarrassing himself.

He opened his eyes again and took in your features up close. You had a little mole that he hadn’t noticed before cause it was so tiny. Your eyelashes occasionally fluttered, and you gripped his waist, nuzzling your head into his chest in your sleep.

Needless to say, his heart was racing in his chest when you did that. He couldn’t lie that it felt absolutely amazing how you were holding onto him right now, but he knew if you were awake, you wouldn’t be doing that, so to save you any embarrassment when you woke up, he slowly peeled your arms away from his body.

About a minute passed before you found your way back to his side of the bed after it got chilly. You hummed in contentment when you found his warmth once more.

He just gave in and let you hug him. He tried so hard to resist the urge to hug you back, but he couldn’t. He wrapped his arms around you, letting you rest your head on his chest while he stroked your arm lightly. He figured it would be fine since you’d be up soon anyway. 

Little did he know you were hungover from last night and you wouldn’t be waking up anytime soon. Only a few minutes tick by, and soon his eyes slowly fell shut. He didn’t want to go back to sleep because the dogs probably needed checking up on, but your warm embrace was slowly but surely aiding him to fall back asleep in your arms peacefully.

Eventually, sometime in the evening, you stirred awake and noticed something very tall and very big sleeping next to you. All the memories from last night came flooding in, and you gasped when you remembered that you had kissed him, well on the cheek, but it was still a kiss. You probably made him feel so uncomfortable and weirded out by your stupidity.

You really felt like kicking yourself for doing that, but you blame it on the drunkenness cause if you were sober, you would have never done that.

At least you convinced yourself of that.

The headache wasn’t too bad, and the room didn’t feel like it was spinning, so that was a good sign that you didn’t drink too much.

Or so you thought.

Your eyes nearly bulged from their sockets when you saw what time it was, but you quickly remembered you were on vacation and you didn’t have work, so you allowed yourself to relax, deciding to stop worrying so much and just enjoy the afternoon with heeseung.

Speaking of, he looked so peaceful sleeping next to you, and as much as you hated to disturb him, he needed to have a proper meal.

But staying in bed for five more minutes wouldn’t hurt. You looked up at him, and you heard little snores coming from his pouted lips. You unknowingly lifted your hand and smoothed your thumb over his cheek and then his chin until you were eventually brushing his bangs out of his eyes to get a better look at his face. He nuzzled his face into your warm palm while still asleep, and your heart melted. He was so precious, and everything he said to you last night came into your mind as you admired him.

What type of people could hurt such a delicate soul?

Sure, he was a little crusty around the edges at first, but when he opened up and started to get more comfortable with you, he was a real sweetheart. Occasionally, he’d make your coffee before work, or he’d do the laundry just so he was doing something instead of using you for a free place to stay, and he even included Myla, taking her on walks with him and Mylo, treating her as if she was his own.

Maybe you were getting too ahead of yourself, but in the last month, you had really grown quite fond of him.

Your thoughts were cut off when he started to stir out of sleep. One of the two dogs had started scratching on the door, and you quickly withdrew yourself from him before he noticed you watching him sleep like a weirdo.

You hopped out of bed and looked down at the door. Of course, it was no other than Mylo and Myla staring you in the face, probably asking to go out or for food.

Heeseung sat up and rubbed his eyes, combing his fingers through his hair while he looked at the two waiting at your guy's door.

You walked out quietly and fed them both, giving heeseung time to fully wake up before going back and checking on him, and admittedly, he looked so cute under the covers relaxing. “Morning,” you said softly.

“Good morning, y/n.” he smiled tiredly, his eyes barely even open as he greeted you.

“Uhh, about last night,” you started out slowly, trying to find the best and quickest way to go about this. “I was drunk last night, so I might have done something weird, just so you know.” You chewed at your lip nervously. “Like everything I said was true, but I tend to get really affectionate when I’m drunk, so the kiss was…” you trailed off a little, trying to save yourself the embarrassment of having this conversation.

“Because you were drunk?” He finished your words for you after putting two and two together.

“Yeah,” you breathed out and stood there awkwardly.

“Oh,” he said, disappointed, and you missed the frown on his face cause you were too busy staring blankly out the window. “Okay,” that’s all he could say. There wasn’t anything else that came to mind, and he felt like the air had just been sucked out of the room as a weird tight feeling in his chest made its presence known.

“Yeah, sorry for that.” You clasped your hands together and concluded, hoping he’d forgive your stupidity. “I’m gonna go make something to eat. Do you want anything?” You tried to switch the topic smoothly, but it didn’t seem to work.

“No, thank you,” he declined with a clenched jaw, getting out of bed and going to the restroom without another word.

You buried your face in your hands, and you couldn’t help but be upset with yourself because of what you did. What made it worse was the fact he actually seemed upset about the kiss. Gosh, the last thing you wanted to do was make him uncomfortable in a space that was supposed to be safe and comfortable for him, but you did just that.

The only time you saw heeseung was when he took the dogs on a walk and came back inside, but for the rest of the day, he shut himself inside his room with Mylo.

“She was just drunk,” he laughed pathetically at himself. “Should’ve known.” he doesn’t know why he foolishly thought you might have actually been interested in him in some way. “Gosh, I’m so stupid,” he scolded himself for his ridiculous assumption about you kissing him on the cheek. “But you,” he scratched Mylo’s chin. “Mylas smitten with you huh?” He laughed. “Well, at least one of us got the girl.”

He rolled over on his bed, thinking of where to go from here, but first things first, he needed to see you. He sighed and got up out of bed, approaching you while you were sitting on the sofa watching TV with Myla. “Hey, y/n, can I talk to you for a sec?” He asked softly as he entered the living room.

You were surprised that he even showed himself to you after your nonsense earlier, and you immediately felt your heart drop. He was probably going to tell you off for kissing him and asking him to sleep with you in the same bed. He was probably going to make boundaries and not talk to you anymore unless necessary. Before more bad thoughts crept up in your head. You answer with a small yet nervous nod as he takes a seat beside you on the couch.

“So, umm, I don’t know how to even start this,” he sighed as Mylo sat down at his feet.

Yep, this was it. He was getting ready to tell you he didn’t want to stay here anymore. Yep, y/n, you really blew it this time. “It’s okay. Just start when you’re ready,” you said calmly despite all the anxiety filling your body.

He smiled at you, appreciative of your welcoming nature. “So I’ll just get straight to the point: I have no education or previous experience of anything, and no one wants to hire me, so unfortunately, until I can get that settled, I have no way of getting a job,” he explained the fact to you hesitantly, feeling ashamed and embarrassed that as a young adult, he had absolutely nothing going for him.

You breathed a sigh of relief. At least he wasn’t telling you off for kissing him last night. You imagined he was going to tell you something so much worse. “Come work with me at the cafe. I can get you in. I guarantee it.” You knew you’d have to do some sweet talking, but your manager was a good guy. He hired you when you were at your lowest, so you’re sure he’d help a guy in need like heeseung.

“But I don’t have any experience,” he worries.

“Okay, hear me out on this.” You quickly dialed your manager's number and put the phone on speaker. “Hi, boss,” you chirped when he answered.

“Y/n! Hi, you just can’t seem to get enough of this place even when you’re on vacation,” he chuckled.

“Well, boss, it’s something really important. A good friend of mine needs a job,” you unknowingly start biting on your nails out of nervousness.

“Oh! Great! Niki just went back home for the holidays, so your timing is impeccable.” You smiled slightly at that. So far, so good. You gave heeseung a thumbs up.

“There’s just one thing… he was homeless, and he doesn’t have any prior experience or anything, so I was hoping maybe you could hire him in and just give him a chance.”

You heard a long sigh over the line. “That’s asking for a lot. Do you know I need someone reliable for this position? It’s nearing fall, and that’s when we’re the busiest.”

You looked at Heeseung, and he nodded his head enthusiastically, showing you that he’d be more than reliable and you trusted him. “He is,” you said, feeling more hopeful by the second.

“You know what? I’ll give him a shot, but I won’t be nice just because he’s your friend.”

“You won’t have to. I know he’s perfect for the job,” you said with confidence.

“I trust you,” he replied. He was stern, but you knew he was a good guy, and he wouldn’t regret giving heeseung a chance.

“Thank you, boss.”

“No problem, y/n. Bring him in for an interview next Wednesday.” 

“Will do!” You hung up and smiled at heeseung, who was already staring at you with the biggest, brightest smile on his face. You literally were his guardian Angel.

“You’re amazing!” He smiled even wider, tackling you in a hug. Out of pure joy, he swears if he got the job, he’d do everything to repay you.

☕️.

“Y/n, I’m so nervous,” heeseung whined, adjusting his dress shirt for the thousandth time.

“Don’t be.” You stood in front of him, taking his hands off his shirt and fixing his tie for him so he wouldn’t have to fidget with it anymore. “You’re gonna do great, I know it.” You had already rehearsed at home, and he did excellently; he had absolutely nothing to worry about. If he hadn’t told you he didn’t have prior experience before, then you wouldn’t have known with how professionally he answered all your questions.

He nodded at your words and took a deep breath, preparing himself for the interview. “Thanks, y/n, I really mean it.” 

“Anytime.” You smiled at him and checked your watch. “It’s time.”

You cheered him on quietly as your boss made an appearance from the back of the cafe. “You must be heeseung?” 

“Yes sir, nice to meet you.” heeseung stood up and took confident steps towards your boss, extending his hand for a handshake. He looked back at you and smiled one last time before going in for his interview.

You felt nervous for him, but you don’t even know why cause you knew he’d do great.

Not even twenty minutes later, he came out with a beaming smile on his face, and you could already tell he had good news. Your body reacted out of excitement, and you immediately ran to him, engulfing him in a big hug. “I got the job!”

“I’m so proud of you!”

“Thank you. I promise I’m going to repay you in full.” he rocked you back and forth in his arms, and this had to be the best day of his entire life.

☕️.

After you and heeseung went back home, you were both just relaxing on the couch, talking about any random topics that came up while the TV played in the background. Heeseung was extra chatty today. The excitement of getting a job still hadn’t left his body yet.

He smiled and scooted a little closer to you as the two babies stuffed themselves on the couch next to you guys. “I know I haven’t even started the job yet, but as soon as I do, I’ll repay you, I promise.”

“Heeseung, thank you, but there’s no need, really,” you tell him earnestly.

“Y/n, you’re too nice to me. You’ve given me everything, and I’ve done nothing in return for you. I want to pay you back. Please let me.” he looked at you, eyes full of nothing but sincerity. “It’s the least I can do.”

“Okay, but you’ve done more than you know,” you tell him, resting your hand on his knee.

“What do you mean by that?” He tilted his head curiously.

“Where do I start?” You sat up straight, hand still softly stroking his knee. “First of all, you’ve given this place life. You gave Myla a friend, and you really brightened up my days. Everything is just better when you’re around, you know?” You retracted your hand nervously, playing with a stray thread on the couch.

“How?” Everything you told him just now was a completely foreign concept. He felt like a burden. He never felt appreciated or cared for. He always just felt like he was an obstacle in someone’s way, rather that be down a random alleyway on the street or back at his adoptive parent's house, so your words were confusing to him, to say the least.

“Cause you’re just fun to be around.” You grew flustered as soon as the words left your mouth. “I like your company, and you make me feel comfortable and safe.” 

“Me? You mean that? Like actually?” he mumbled while looking down at his lap.

“I do.” his head quickly shot up at your words, and you could see the tears gathering in his eyes. No one had ever told him anything like that in his whole entire life, and he couldn’t fathom how anyone could feel that way about him, especially cause all his young adult life, he was told that he was useless, and now here you are telling him the exact opposite.

He quickly hid his face in his palms, hiding his tears from you. “I-I think I need to be alone right now.” he stood up abruptly and walked to the spare bedroom while you sat there half worried, half confused.

“Did I say something wrong?” You whispered to yourself.

Heeseung was just far too overwhelmed with emotions to even respond to you. He wasn’t trying to walk out on you like that, but he needed to gather himself first. He didn’t know what to do; everything he’d felt with you in these past few weeks was so weird, not in a bad way, but in a way that he’d never felt anything like it. He didn’t know what he did to deserve you or anything you’ve done for him so far, but he wouldn’t change it for the world. He was so so thankful for you.

You played with the dogs on the couch for the meantime despite being worried about heeseung. You gave him some time to himself before you went to check in on him. You knocked softly on his door prior to entering. “Heeseung?”

“Yeah, come in.” he quickly wiped his tears as you entered, but anyone with eyes could see he had just been crying.

“Are you okay?” You asked softly and took a seat beside him, your hand automatically stroking his back soothingly.

“I’m more than okay. I’m perfect,” he smiled, pulling you into his arms and hugging you impossibly close. Naturally, you hugged him back cause you absolutely loved his hugs. They were so warm, and they could take any stress away. You felt content just being in his arms.

“Are you sure?” you mumbled into the crook of his neck, and he hummed in response, hugging you a little tighter.

“I’m just overjoyed, that’s all,” he sighs in contentment.

“Oh, I’m glad.” You patted his back gently, relieved that you hadn’t said anything offensive to him. “I was thinking if you wanted to, we could celebrate your employment with dinner.”

“Ooh, okay, what are we gonna make?” He asked, releasing you from his arms, an excited expression on his face.

“Oh umm, I was thinking of going out to eat,” you tell him your idea.

“Wow, okay, that sounds fun. I’ve never eaten out before. What should I wear? How should I act?” He hopped off his bed, searching through his very, very small wardrobe, which reminds you you need to take him shopping again. All he had was loungewear and a suit for his interview.

His excitement was absolutely adorable to you, but when you found out he’d never been to dinner before, that broke your heart. Something that most people do naturally was something foreign to him, and you realized in that moment you took a lot of things for granted. “Just wear something comfy,” you smiled.

☕️.

“Be good while I’m gone. Don’t mess up any more of y/n’s furniture, got it? She’s kind enough to let us stay here, so we must respect her.” Mylo just sat there, tail wagging while he looked at his master. “You don’t got it, do you?” Heeseung frowned. Mylo had already practically destroyed your table in the kitchen, and something deep down told him Mylo wasn’t going to stop until the living room furniture was polished in his scratch marks.

“Heeseung, it’s fine. Besides, I needed a new table anyways.”

“But-“

“Come on, we’ll be late for our reservation.” You grabbed his head, leading him to the door.

“Wait, how do I look?” He was in a plain white dress shirt, black slacks, and hair slicked back to perfection, and he smelled delicious.

“Handsome,” you complimented him as casually as you could despite your heart pumping wildly in your chest.

“You look beautiful,” you thanked him shyly as you both just kinda stood there awkwardly until one of you came back to your senses after staring at each other for far too long.

“The reservation,” he mumbled slowly, still taking in your beauty.

“Yeah,” you whispered and shook your head to break out of your trance, finally leaving your apartment, praying that the babies would behave while you were both gone.

☕️.

Going out and spending time with heeseung really made time fly by. He was just so down to earth you never really got the chance to settle down and talk to him one-on-one, but after tonight, you learned a lot of things about him. Despite his past, he was very bright and hopeful. He was an extremely humble and admirable person, and you could tell once he got on his feet, he was going to have a very bright future ahead of him and you’re just happy you could help him get there..

The dinner went smoothly. Two hours passed by way too soon, and it was already time to go back home, but you were hoping you could both do this again sometime really soon.

The both of you gasped in pure shock the moment you entered your apartment. “Mylo! Get off of her!” heeseung shirked, but it was a bit too late for that. “Oh goodness, I’m so sorry,” heeseung quickly apologized as you closed your apartment door and stood outside with a shocked expression, trying to take in the fact that the two of your babies were mating while you both were out.

“Well, I think the furniture is the least of our concerns,” you joked.

“Yeah,” heeseung laughed along with you, still a bit shocked as well. From what he could tell, Mylo wasn’t showing any signs, but he supposed it was mating season after all. Time had really flown since he started staying with you.

“Do you maybe want to go for a walk?” Heeseung looked up at you, his honey-like eyes staring into your own, and just like at dinner, you couldn’t peel your eyes away from them. “You know, while they have their alone time,” you chuckled.

“Sure, a walk sounds nice,” he smiles, taking your hand in his as he helps you down the stairs. He immediately lets go the moment you reach the bottom of the steps, and you’re kinda disappointed at the loss of contact, but you and him didn’t have a relationship quite like that, so holding your hand would be a bit inappropriate at the moment. “So I guess we’re gonna have a bunch of baby Mylas and Mylo’s running around the apartment.” 

“I guess so.” You still couldn’t believe that they actually mated. That was the last thing on your mind when you guys left for dinner.

“Ohh, I already have some names,” he says, tucking his hands into his pockets. “Myah for a girl and Myles for a boy.”

“That’s really cute, heeseung, but surely we can’t keep all those puppies,” you say. Of course, you wanted them, but where would they all go?

“We can’t keep them?” Heeseung pouts.

“Where would we put them all? She’s gonna have at least four, and that’s at least,” you exclaimed. You heard they could have up to 15, and if that happened, you were going to be in for a real surprise.

“Yeah….you’re right,” he replies, already sulking cause he couldn’t keep all the baby puppies.

“We can keep the puppies.” You tell him to lighten his mood and his eyes light up right away as he looks at you.

“Really?!” He says excitedly.

“But,” you say sharply. “When they grow, we have to take them to a shelter or something.” his shoulders immediately slump down again.

You really aren’t sure what’s going on in that little noggin of his, but did he really think you could have an apartment full of adult shepherds?

“Okay,” he literally sounded just like a child who couldn’t get their way, and you shook your head softly, deciding to deal with that problem a bit further down the road.

“So…” you continued your little walk, enjoying what was left of the warm weather. “Did you enjoy your time?”

“I loved it. I haven’t had so much fun in ages. Do you think we could go out again sometime soon?” You smile softly, nodding your head. One thing you liked about Heeseung was that he was never shy about showing his gratitude and thankfulness. “I know I already said it, but I’m gonna keep saying it. Thank you for everything.” he came to a stop and turned to you. “You really saved my life, y/n, and I mean it. Without you, I would have lost hope by now.”

“Nonsense,” you laughed it off. You weren’t going to take all the credit for his hard work over the years.

“No, really, I was giving up until you came along and gave me something to look forward to. Gave me some type of hope that if I just held on a little longer, something special would come my way or someone special.” he took a step closer, his eyes locked on your lips until they darted to your eyes before he engulfed you in a hug and again you were a bit disappointed cause you really, really thought he might have kissed you with they way he looked at your lips, but you’re sure you just imagine that cause who were you kidding? He probably didn’t even like you like that, plus your relationship was purely platonic, so it’d be weird if he kissed you, even though you really wished he did.

“You’re gonna make me cry, heeseung.” You wrapped your arms around him, hugging him close.

“Please do. I don’t want to be the only one crying here,” he chuckles as warm tears roll down his cheeks.

“Okay,” you laugh slightly, your own tears now wetting his dress shirt.

Eventually, it got late, and after his heartfelt confession, you both went home. If you didn’t catch Mylo and Myla in the act, you’d think they slept the whole time while you and heeseung were gone, but no.

You and heeseung tiptoed together down the hall so you wouldn’t wake the babies and finally go your separate ways after spending the whole day and night together. “Thanks again for today. Goodnight y/n,”

“Goodnight, hee,” you whisper, and he only registered what you called him once you closed the door, and he went to sleep with a silly little smile on his face from the nickname you’d given to him.

☕️.

“So Hoon, this is my good friend heeseung, and you’ll be training him today.” your vacation was over, and this was heeseung’s first day on the job, so the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. You were so excited you got to work with him on his first day.

“Woah Woah Woah, I never signed up for any of this. When did you become the boss?” Sunghoon raised his brow with a teasing look.

“I’m not the boss, but I’m the boss of you, so you do what I say.” You put your hands on your hips, speaking matter-of-factly.

“Yes, boss,” he saluted, making you giggle. “Hi, my name is Sunghoon.” he quickly turned to heeseung, shaking his hand politely.

“Hi, I’m heeseung.” sunghoon nodded and focused his attention back to you. 

Heeseung just stood there awkwardly, watching you and Sunghoon laugh and converse amongst yourselves. He didn’t know what exactly he was feeling when he saw you and Sunghoon talking, but whatever it was didn’t feel good, and he didn’t like it one bit. 

Heeseung just moped around for the time being, looking at all the different coffee machines until you two had finally stopped talking. “Alright, time to get you familiar around here. My name is Sunghoon, and wait, I already said that. Never mind, just follow me.” he put his arm on heeseung’s back and led him to the back while you gave him an excited little wave.

Hours passed by, and the training was going smoothly. Sunghoon had no doubts about your friend. He’d do just perfect here. “I knew you’d be good at this. With your skills and that face; you’ll be getting all my tips in no time,” Sunghoon laughed.

“What do you mean? Your tips? Is that like a good thing?” Heeseung asked curiously.

“Well, good for you, bad for me,” he chuckled. “If you think you’re ready, I can show you how to take orders as early as today.”

“Oh yes, I’m ready,” Heeseung said, determined he wanted to know everything so he could perform his absolute best. Ever since he stepped into the building, he wanted to prove himself and be the best worker he could be.

When the customers started coming in, heeseung was a bit nervous in the beginning, but he got over it after the first few customers and took the orders smoothly. Just after one day, he was already proficient in everything, which was kinda scary to Sunghoon but also very good.

“What did you do to him?” You asked Sunghoon as you both watched him working away from the back. He was handling each customer so professionally it took you at least a week to get that comfortable, and here he is doing it all in one day.

“Don’t blame this on me. You’re the one who brought that freak of nature in here.” sunghoon put his hands up in defense, going to make some of the orders heeseung was taking.

“You’re doing great.” you walked up to heeseung when things started to slow down a bit. “And it’s only your first day,” you congratulated him, patting him on his shoulder.

“Yeah, thanks.” he was still feeling weird from what happened earlier, and he didn’t feel like talking much right now unless he had to. Whatever this stupid feeling was in his chest, he hoped it’d go away soon so he could focus on work fully.

“Boss will want you at full-time right away,” you smiled.

“Cool,” he forced a laugh as some more customers came through the door.

Odd, you thought, but shook it off. He seemed to be acting different all day, but he was probably a little stressed from taking on so much work in one day. “Here, $1,76 is your change, and your order will be right out.” he smiled politely at the customer as you watched from a distance while cleaning tables.

The customer in said topic was absolutely beautiful; she had long blonde hair, blue eyes, a pretty smile, and perfect skin. To top it all off, she was so polite.

You knew heeseung was just doing his job, but to see him smiling at her so brightly while he barely acknowledged you at all today made your stomach turn.

But you shook that off, too, cause you and heeseung weren’t dating, and you were just being a little irrational at this point.

Heeseung was the same with you throughout the rest of the shift, and even when you guys went home, he wasn’t talkative. He didn’t eat dinner, and he barely managed to mumble out a goodnight before he went to his room and never came back out for the rest of the night, which was especially odd because he always used to want to watch TV with you before bed.

You just sighed, wondering what could be on his mind and making him act so differently towards you, but again, you chalked it up to stress and hoped he’d be feeling better by tomorrow after a good night's rest.

Needless to say, you went to bed in a sour mood, hoping the next morning would be better.

☕️.

Except it wasn’t.

The girl that you had been envious of previously came back the very next day.

Your blood was already boiling the moment she came in, and you had grown tired of her overly affectionate attitude towards him very quickly.

At first, you weren’t too bothered. You thought she was just being polite to him, which was fine, but when she came back and started making small talk with your ma- heeseung, you could barely even hold it together, and what made it all worse was that he still wasn’t acting like himself. He rarely talked to you at all this morning and if he did it was only if he needed help with something.

Yet he was perfectly fine with chatting away with her. Did you do something wrong? Was he mad at you? You couldn’t help but wonder.

“If looks could kill, that girl would be six feet under,” Sunghoon chimes as if you needed his two cents right now.

“Whatever.” You tossed the towel over your shoulder, going to the back to wash down some dishes so you wouldn’t have to hear her, but you still did, unfortunately, and what you heard next made you take an early break.

“Here’s my number. I was thinking we could go out on a date sometime,” she handed him a piece of paper with her number on it.

“O-oh,” heeseung blushed a little. This was the first time he’d ever been asked out before, well, except for you, but that was different, and he didn’t really know what to say or do. “Okay, yeah, sure, we can go out sometime.” he smiles a little awkwardly.

“Great! Bye, cutie,” she waved to him, and he stood there with the biggest smile on his face.

“Bye,” he said softly, and he tucked the number safely into his back pocket.

You took your apron off and slammed it on the back counter before taking a break.

You knew you were overreacting, but you just needed a minute for this to all settle in, but before you could even let your frustrations out. Heeseung was sitting right next to you, and you had to play off your anger and disguise it as being tired. “Hey, y/n, how come you’re taking a break so early?” Heeseung was finally starting to feel a little bit more like himself now that you and Sunghoon weren’t literally joined at the hip. He felt like he could get your attention back on him, at least while on break, that is.

“Just tired,” you reply, completely uninterested in having a conversation right now.

“Ah, I see.” he clears his throat. “I’ll ask you later then.”

“It’s fine, hee,” you tell him, and he goes ahead and continues on.

His heart started to beat quicker hearing the nickname you gave him, but he did his best to compose himself.“So, like, this girl just asked me out.” Oh no, you really wish you hadn’t told him to tell you because this is the last thing you want to hear about right now. “And I’m really nervous about it because I’ve never been asked out on a date before,” he picked at his nails.

So he didn’t think of the other night he spent with you as a date?

Ouch.

But again, you guys weren’t dating, so it really wasn’t a date, even if you really wanted it to be. “That’s great! Heeseung, it’s okay to be nervous on your first date.” You patted his shoulder comfortingly despite feeling a growing ache in your chest.

“I just don’t want to mess it up or make a fool out of myself, you know?” He poured out his worries to you. “Cause, as you know, I have a habit of saying too much sometimes,” he laughs softly.

“You won’t, hee, I promise.” you smile and stand up, not having the physical or mental strength to talk to him about this any longer cause the thought of him with another girl that isn’t you was tearing you apart inside which you know is stupid because you’ve never even made any advances towards him. Still, you just wanted to take things slow, apparently, though that wasn’t the best approach cause someone had gotten to him before you could work up the courage to. “Just be yourself.”

“Just be myself,” he whispered while you were walking away. He took the piece of paper with the number on it out of his pocket and looked at it. “She’s right.” he stayed outside on the back steps, enjoying the last little bit of his break.

☕️.

“Y/n! I’m heading out now. Could you tell me how I look?” You heard heeseung shouting from the living room while you were lying in bed with a headache cause all week, all he did was talk about his stupid date, and all week, you had to pretend that you were happy for him.

“You look good,” you said once you went to the living room and saw him standing there in a very, very attractive outfit.

“O-oh,” he looked down at his outfit, rethinking his choice cause whenever you called him handsome, he felt confident, but since you said he just looked good, he started feeling a little self-conscious about himself. “Just good? Not handsome?” He pouted.

You sighed and walked closer to him. “No, hee, you look handsome as always. Go and enjoy your date, okay?” You corrected his tie, took a little piece of lint off his top, and patted his chest.

“Yes, ma'am,” he smiles as he exits the door, feeling warm inside after getting your approval.

☕️.

You were literally seething on your bed, and you couldn’t take it, knowing that the man you liked was out on a date with some girl who probably didn’t even deserve him.

You almost knew for a certainty she only asked him out that day cause of his looks. It’s not like she gave him food and money when he was on the street. Where was she when he was alone and scared? Exactly, absolutely nowhere.

But you were and still are and always will be.

But you knew that was a stupid way of thinking. He doesn’t have to be obligated to like you just cause you willingly took care of him, but still, you wished he felt the same way about you that you felt for him.

As sad as it was, though, you were still happy for him. He’s come so far, and he deserves to be happy after all he’s been through. You just wanted him to be happy even if things didn’t turn out the way you wanted them to, even if you weren’t the one that made him happy.

When ten o’clock came, heeseung was thanking his stars because he had the absolute worst time ever. He thought he was gonna have fun like the dinner you took him out on, and it was everything but that. 

He knocked softly on the door, hoping you were still awake at this hour. “Hi, y/n,”

“Hey, hee, did you have fun?” You asked after calming yourself down from all the negative thoughts that you had previously.

“Oh gosh, no, she kept asking me to drink, and I don’t drink. I tried it, though, and it was really bad, and then out of nowhere, she tried to kiss me, and I obviously declined because I wasn’t interested, plus her breath smelled like alcohol, and then she got upset, and we didn’t even get dessert” he pouted. “And she kept asking if I wanted to Netflix and chill. I don’t even know what Netflix is, and to my knowledge, we were already chilling,” he whined, going on and on about the horrors of his date.

Something told you he didn’t have much experience in the dating scene either, and you had to stifle your laugh because he looked so adorable and clueless. After hearing about his date you knew your suspicions about her liking him just for his looks were true, but you still couldn’t believe she was that forward with him, especially drinking on the first date.

“I’m sorry. We have ice cream in the freezer. Are you still up for some dessert?” You suggested hoping to save his terrible night with a sweet treat.

“Yes, please,” he sighed. All he wanted was to change his clothes and spend some time with you after his horrible date. “Y/n, what’s Netflix and chill?” He asked innocently while you both sat at the table and ate ice cream together. This was already ten times better than his date.

Oh, boy, were you in for a ride. Not only did you have to explain to him what Netflix and chill was, but you also had to tell him about why people typically asked other people out on dates and the expressions he made once he realized that were precious but also hilarious.

“Eww, no, No Netflix and chill, just dessert,” he whined. He knows better than to go on a date again, if you could even call it that.

“Okay, just dessert,” you laughed and ruffled his hair, serving him and yourself some more ice cream. You both went to the living room and cozied up on your sofa, watching some TV and enjoying each other’s presence for the rest of the night.

☕️.

You felt bad for liking the fact that heeseung’s date went bad, but you quickly erased those silly thoughts from your head. He was single, and he could be with whoever he liked, and you accepted that, which you’re so glad you did cause, apparently, he was the most wanted man; everyone at the cafe was fawning over him, not just you and Sunghoon but guys and girls too. It was busier than ever after he got hired there. The tips they left for him were insane, not to mention all the numbers he got from women. he just ignored them, though, after that horrible date he went on, he wasn’t up for going on another one anytime soon, besides hanging out with a girl that wasn’t you just didn’t feel right to him anyway. No one made him feel safe and comfortable to be himself like you did.

He was already having a rough day after his failed date last night. On top of all the compliments, small talk, and outward flirting he was getting, it was just a little exhausting, and when he saw you and “Hoon” talking, it just soured his mood even more, that same weird feeling bubbling up in his chest, again. “Y/n, can you help me with the register, please?” He knew darn well he didn’t need any help, but if it stopped you from talking to that guy you called Hoon, then he was more than happy to pretend he needed help. “Thanks, y/n. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” he smiles and awkwardly places his hand on your shoulder, attempting to show you some type of affection even though he doesn’t really know how.

You do your best to hide your flustered state and reply. “You’re welcome. I’m always here for you.” You placed your hand over his, which was still lingering on you, sending jolts of electricity through his body, awakening all the little butterflies in his tummy.

Not even five minutes later, after your guy’s little moment, you were in the back with Sunghoon talking again about god knows what while heeseung used every last tactic to split you guys up, but somehow, you always found your way back together again.

“You need some help?” Sunghoon asked heeseung, who was angrily scrubbing away at the dishes after closing.

“No,” he said without even looking at Sunghoon.

Sunghoon smiled a knowing smile. Heeseung was so obvious it was adorable. “I know you like y/n, and I know you think we have something going on, but I’m taken, and y/n and I are just really close friends.” he could see the jealousy just oozing off of heeseung for the whole day the same jealousy that was oozing off you just a week prior.

“What are you on about? I don’t like y/n like that, and if you guys are dating, I don’t care either,” he replied harshly.

“Pretty sure she likes you too, and maybe when you’re not looking like you want to bite my head off, you could ask her out,” Sunghoon jokes.

“She does?” heeseung says excitedly, his eyes lighting up, causing Sunghoon to let out a hearty laugh. “Wait,” heeseung sighs. “I-I'm sorry, I just don’t know. I’m sorry. I don’t know what the heck is happening to me,” he pouts, unknowingly dropping the sponge he was using in the sink, his shoulders soon deflating in defeat.

“You’re jealous you’re in love, and you’re confused about it, and you don’t know it, that’s it.” sunghoon pats heeseung’s shoulders. “But no worries, once you ask her out, it’ll all be fine. Trust me, I was just like you before I got with my girl.”

Heeseung gives him a small smile. “You think she likes me back? It doesn’t seem like it,” heeseung said innocently. His mind couldn’t help but wander back to the time you said kissing him on the cheek was a mistake. Since that day, he just gave up hope that you would like him back altogether.

“She likes you back,” Sunghoon assured him. “She definitely likes you back,” he says, remembering all the jealous glares you were giving to the customers today.

“O-oh, okay,” he blushed. “When should I do it?”

Oh brother, where did you find him? Oh yeah, on the street. “When it feels right,” he gave heeseung a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. “Now go home with y/n. I’ll finish up here.” he took heeseung’s spot in front of the sink.

“But-“

“It’s alright, just go home,” heeseung thanked him profusely and already thought of a million ways to repay him the next time he saw him.

☕️.

When it feels right.

It always feels right. He thinks he feels right whenever he’s with you. Right now, being on the couch while you sit and watch TV together feels right. “Y/n? Can I ask you a question?” You shift your attention to heeseung, who is already turned towards you, looking at you with a serious expression on his face. 

“Of course.” You turned down the volume on the TV so you could answer his question while giving him your full attention.

“I like you. Do you want to go out on a date with me?” He says softly, eyes showing heavy emotion as he waits for your answer. He’s a little tense and really nervous, but he’s still smiling, that pretty little smile of his.

Your ears must be wrong or something cause there’s no way the Lee Heeseung wanted you to go on a date with him.

Not when he has people lined up quite literally asking him for his number on a daily basis.

But when he stares at you, not saying anything else and waiting patiently for your answer, you realize that he is indeed asking you to go out with him, and he’s one hundred percent serious. “Yes, heeseung, I would love that!” You all but jump on his lap excitedly. “Of course, I want to go on a date with you!”

“Yeah?” He chuckles, hands automatically wrapping around your torso. “Okay,” he breathed the deep breath he was holding for the last minute. “I can’t wait,” he mutters. 

“Me neither,” you whisper, getting lost in his sweet brown eyes.

“Do you want to go now?” He doesn’t want to rush it, but he really wants to spend another day with you, like the one you both celebrated during his employment.

“Sure, hee, we can go now.” You smile at him, unable to contain your excitement.

“Okay!” He returns your smile and goes to his room to get dressed cause, of course, he has to look handsome for you.

Meanwhile, you’re squealing onto the couch, ruffling your hair cause you were about to go insane lee heeseung actually liked you back and wanted to take you out for a date.

When you looked up, Mylo and Myla were staring at you with their eyes wide and ears pulled back from your loud shrieks. “Don’t judge me,” you pointed at them and ran to your room to get dressed and ready for your date with heeseung.

☕️.

After you both stood in the living room for at least five minutes complimenting each other's outfits like broken records, you finally left the house.

It was all fun asking you out, but when it came to the part about actually going out, Heeseung didn’t know what to do.

He didn’t know how to drive, so he was already feeling a bit self-conscious when you had to drive. He hadn’t received his first check yet, so he couldn’t even treat you, and now his mood was down. 

You were both having a good conversation, but he got lost in thought, wondering what you’d think about him not being the one taking the initiative. After all, he was taking you on a date, not the other way around. “Hee, are you okay?” You ask when you saw him completely zoned out.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” he sighed, fake smiling at you, and he couldn’t help but think after tonight, you’d probably never want to go back out with him ever again. Little did he know you were having the best night of your life. You weren’t thinking about how he didn’t drive you. You weren’t thinking about how he didn’t pay. All you were thinking about was how much fun you were having with him and how lucky you were to be out on a date with the person you liked for what felt like forever.

“No, you’re not. You haven’t even touched your ice cream, and you love ice cream.” You furrow your brows, wondering what changed so suddenly, everything was going fine, and then suddenly it wasn’t.

“Y/n, I’m sorry,” he apologized out of nowhere, making the situation even more confusing for you. Before you could even ask why, he went on to explain. “I know you’re disappointed with our date, but I just want you to know that when I get my check, I’ll take you out somewhere. I promise I’ll pay for everything, and with all the tips I’ve been getting, I’ve been saving up for a car, and I know I haven’t even paid you back yet, but I swear I will and-“

“Heeseung, what are you even saying?” You ask him in disbelief.

How could he possibly think you were disappointed? You were literally having the best night of your life all thanks to him.

“I’m saying that I’m still just a useless bum, and I’m sorry I can’t give you more.” Your heart breaks when you see his eyes begin to water. The now beautiful date outside on the balcony all of a sudden turned gloomy.

“Hee…” You place your hand over his, and he retracts it, resting his hand on his lap as he looks down. “No,” you whisper and scoot your chair next to his, leaning into his side. “I don’t want more; I just want you.” he looks up, his teary gaze meets yours, and your eyes look so beautiful and sincere that he can’t help but get lost in them. “I don’t care how much you have or how much you don’t have. I just want you.” You cup his cheek, stroking it softly with your thumb. “But if you insist on giving me more than kiss me,” he sucks in a sharp breath and quickly tries to compose himself, which you find adorable like everything else he does. At least a minute passes before he even moves, but you don’t mind cause you’d wait forever for him.

“But-“

“Kiss me, hee, please,” and he does just that. His eyes slowly flutter shut. The last image he remembers is of your beautiful eyes and your soft, puckered lips. As he leans in, placing his lips on yours, his body heats up immediately, and the chills he had gotten from the ice cream prior completely wither away. He lifts his hand, cupping your cheek as well while his warm lips rest against yours, and the kiss is so soft, so sweet, so delicate that he almost feels like he’s going to cry cause he’s never felt anything like it ever and seconds later he does cry a stray tear rolling down his cheek as he reluctantly separates himself from you.

He never said it to anyone, not even his adoptive parents, but for some reason that he can’t pinpoint, the words just come out of his mouth like it was just any ordinary thing to say to someone. “I love you.” When he hears himself, his eyes widen, almost like he was scared of what your reaction would be, and you laugh softly cause he was always such a sweetheart.

Your own eyes get teary while you swipe the tear off his cheek. “I love you too.” his whole body melts, relaxing into your touch as his smile spreads so wide that it reaches you, and you can’t help but smile back as he sniffles softly. 

At that moment, you didn’t have a doubt in the world when you said those words to him. If anything, it felt natural, like a weight had been lifted, and you had finally poured out all your feelings that you kept bottled up for so long, and it felt amazing.

While you were staring at him, he pecked your lips again before pulling away.

No words needed to be spoken. The love reflected in each of your eyes, and as the night continued, it was filled with laughter, longing smiles, and endless shy glances as you took turns feeding each other the now melted ice cream, but somehow, even though it was melted, it tasted sweeter this way.

☕️.

Hand in hand, you both walked to the same little dog park that you and he went to the day he left. You were so glad those days were behind you. You both sat on the bench together, reminiscing about the first day you both met.

“And you remember when you yelled at me at the cafe?” You asked, laughing softly.

“Oh god,” he hides in the crook of your neck, whining about the embarrassing memories. “I’m still so sorry for that.”

“You were like, I don’t need your help. Just leave me alone,” you teased him further. At the time, it wasn’t exactly a laughing matter, but looking back at it now, it was funny, especially to see how far you both come now. 

“I remember,” he sighed. “It was the night before that group of assholes attacked us. You had given me some cash, I went to the convenience store and bought Mylo some food, but before I could pay, I saw that they were messing with Mylo, so I ran outside, and next thing you know, they’re running off, I went back in the store, grabbed my change and left without a second thought and then the next day I had an interview which went horribly by the way, so I take the bus back home, but before that, I went to the cafe and placed my order and when I went to pull out the money I’m short cause that cashier took my change” you listen intently to his story, that was a lot happening in the short time span of a day.

“I’m so sorry you had to go through all that. It must have been so hard.” You kissed his cheek, your hand moving to the back of his head to play with his hair as he nuzzled into your neck.

“It was baby,” he sighed. “So hard.” The pet name slips out without him even knowing, and it makes your heart beat like ten times faster cause he called you baby. You were literally screaming inside.

“So you tried to get work in the past?” You ask, toying with the little hairs on his nape as his eyes fall shut, enjoying the sensation of your warm fingers on his skin. He could stay like this forever.

“Hmm, many times, and I failed many times. I prefer not to go into detail if you don’t mind,”

“It’s okay, I understand.” You kissed the crown of his head.

“A lot happened in the past nine years, but it was mainly just me finding different alleyways to sleep, going days without food. People judging me for being homeless, which wasn’t fair because they didn’t even know my situation,” he leaned back, sitting up straight, your hand still resting on the back of his head. “I didn’t choose to be homeless. I was forced. What would anyone else do if they were being abused at home? Just sit there and take it, no? So I left, and I never looked back, and even after all the stuff I’ve been through and how bad I’ve been treated just for having less than someone else, it was still better because, in some twisted way, it was better to get hit and yelled at by strangers than your own family you know?” He sniffles, unable to hide his emotions when talking about his past. “Since my real parents turned their backs on me, I turned my back on people, and that’s why when you tried to help me, I assumed you were just like the rest, just giving me money cause you pitied me, and that’s the last thing I wanted cause it made me feel pathetic, made me feel like I was incapable, made me feel weak and useless” he wipes away some of his tears as you rub his back. “But you just wouldn’t take no for an answer,” he laughs, and you smile softly despite the tears you had shed somewhere when he was telling you his story. “That day down that alley, that’s when I knew you were different cause no one had ever gone through that much trouble just for me, and I still think about that day every day. You literally saved me from my old life. You gave me something to look forward to, and you gave me a reason to keep going. It’s funny telling you this now, but the time I left after you took me in, I thought about all our moments together, but one stood out to me the most,” he smiles.

“What’s that?” You say, swiping his cheek where the tears had dried up. 

“I thought to myself about that day when you offered me cream with my coffee.” You furrow your brows, wondering where he was going with this. “Before you, I used to just drink plain black coffee, and after you, I started to drink it with cream.” he held your hand in his thumb, circling the back of it. “And from that moment on, I always said to myself, you were the cream to my coffee. You brightened the dark, bland beverage with light and sweetness, and since that day, I’ve never had black coffee.”

The smile that grew on your face was probably the most genuine, sincere, pure thing heeseung had ever laid his eyes on.

You couldn’t help but hug him so tight, his words hitting every nerve in your body, lighting it up with nothing but pure joy and happiness. You had no idea he thought that highly of you. Sure, you went out of your way to help him, but the fact he said you literally saved him warmed your heart to no end, and if you had the chance, you’d gladly do it all over again. “I love you, coffee,” you confessed, your hands still tightly wrapped around his waist.

“And I love you, cream,” he grins as the sun sets behind you two, bringing this lovely date to its end.

☕️.

“So, did you ask her?” Sunghoon whispers to heeseung while you’re obliviously taking orders.

Heeseung enthusiastically nods his head. “She said yes, and we went out together,” he nearly squeals.

“Ha! I told you!” Sunghoon pinched heeseung on the cheek, making the elder male turn an even brighter shade of red.

“Told what?” You went to the back, where heeseung and Sunghoon looked to be talking and slacking off.

“What? Told who? What happened? I didn’t hear anything. Did you hear anything?” Sunghoon rambles.

“Nope, nothing!” Heeseung practically shouts his reply as you stare at the two in confusion.

“Is that dust? Wow, you know what? I think that’s dust, haha. Let me just squeeze by here.” Sunghoon leaves to go clean the imaginary dust, leaving heeseung all by himself.

“Am I missing something here?” You ask.

“No, nope, nothing at all,” his response is quick as he goes back to washing dishes, and you finished making the orders like nothing ever happened.

“Strange,” you mumbled but shrugged it off, besides heeseung and Sunghoon seemed fine the rest of the day, so you didn’t question it again.

“Hey, y/n, I was thinking if you want, we could go on another date today. You know, if you want, you don’t have to. I’m sure you’re probably tired from work, and I thought it might be nice just to maybe go out and relax, but yeah, you know, actually, never mind because you-“

You quickly cut him off with a soft kiss on his lips. Luckily, most of the customers had cleared out by now, giving you the green light to show affection to your adorable co-worker. “I’d love to.” You walk away from him with a smile while he stands there like a deer in the headlights, softly touching his lips.

“Uhh yeah, okay,” he completely drops what he’s doing and goes from behind the register to clean the tables, even though you were already doing that. 

“Heeseung?” You call to him cause he is literally right next to you, helping you clean the same exact table.

“Hmm?” He hums.

“The register isn’t going to count itself,” you tell him playfully, noticing how ever since you kissed him, he seemed like he was slightly out of it.

“O-oh, okay.” he acknowledged what you said but hadn’t fully processed it yet. “Ohhhhhhhh right, yeah right.” his ears turned bright red, and he scurried on back to the register diligently counting the drawer, and you shook your head softly.

He was impossible.

☕️.

The date was going great. Of course, heeseung loved every last bit of it. He could literally go on a date with you every single day. That’s just how much he loved being with you, except there was a one tiny little problem, nothing major, but he was just so lost in thought. What were you talking about? Well, he doesn’t exactly know. He can’t listen because he’s been thinking about asking you this for weeks now, and when you take a small break from talking, he slips it in. It’s so out of place for anyone else, but it’s perfect for him. “Y/n, will you be my girlfriend?” He struggles to make eye contact with you. His eyes are shaking, and his heart is racing, yet he just can’t seem to look away from you, no matter how shy or flustered he gets.

You were talking about work one moment, and the next, your very handsome date is asking you to be his girlfriend. You’re stunned, you’re shocked, flabbergasted, and every other term used for astonishment when he asks you that, and all you can do is smile, which automatically makes him smile and he’s hoping that’s a good sign. 

His eyes gleam with hope, and your eyes gleam with nothing but joy as a few tears well in them. “Yes, heeseung, I would love nothing more than to be your girlfriend.” You nod softly, an even bigger smile gracing his lips now that you’ve said yes.

“Great!” He says, followed by a laugh, getting a bit teary-eyed himself. “Why do we always end up crying when we’re together?” He jokes, his smile turning into a slight frown as he breaks out in tears of happiness. 

You giggle through tears and reach your hand out, intertwining your fingers together with his. 

“My girlfriend,” he whispers, bringing your hand to his mouth and placing a soft kiss on it. 

“My boyfriend,” he grins, and he doesn’t think that his life could be any better than being here with you right now. He’d do it all over again just to be sitting here staring into your beautiful eyes, calling you his.

☕️.

The whole way back home, heeseung just couldn’t seem to part from you, and neither could you. He’d hold your hand, or you’d rest your hand on his knee while driving home; even when he got out of the car to get the door for you, he glued his hand to yours again, helping you upstairs to your little apartment.

Normally, after a date, you’d both say your goodnights and get ready for bed, but tonight was different. Once you set the keys down on your little coffee table, he just stood in the living room staring at you, almost like he wanted to say something or do something. The feeling was very much mutual as you walked closer and closer to him, placing your hands on his waist; when he leaned in, that was the only sign you needed to close the distance between the both of you as you captured his lips in a soft kiss. 

He hummed softly, his hands mimicking yours, encircling your waist. After a few seconds, you’d both separate, but this time, the kiss lasted a bit longer than all the previous pecks you had given each other. 

The more you took his breath away, the needier the kiss became. He dragged you closer, pressing your body flush against his. His tongue, messily searching for an opening to push between your lips that were closed but soon opened up for him.

Your teeth clash in the beginning, and the kiss is a bit messy and uncoordinated until you both get the hang of it.

Needless to say, you’re both just as inexperienced as each other. You were too busy with school for boys, and heeseung, as sad as it is, didn’t even have a prospect of any intimacy, but he’s okay with that cause it was worth saving himself all for you. 

“Y/n,” he whispers on your lips, nails digging into your hips as he backs you up to the couch, and you sit down. He climbs on top of you, hands going to cup your cheeks. As he deepens the kiss, your head feels light, your body is warm to the touch, and you don’t know where this is going, but you don’t want it to stop.

He straddles your waist, practically sitting on your lip, his lower body grinding softly. He doesn’t notice this, but you do and place your hands on his hips, guiding his movements as you both kiss like your lives depend on it.

You slip your hands under his shirt, fingers tracing the warm flesh of his waist as he whimpers into your mouth. 

He pulls away for a nanosecond to take a breath before locking his lips together with yours again. “Y/n,” he moans when his bulge brushes against you.

You gasped into his mouth, the new and foreign feeling making your body alight with excitement. You trace your hand down to the front of his jeans. It’s almost automatic how you do it despite not having prior experience, but it just feels right. 

“O-oh,” he moans, pulling away from the kiss and breathing heavily, trying to understand what’s happening to his body.

“Sorry, was that too much?” he shakes his head no immediately.

“No, it just feels so,” he gulped, his eyes falling shut. “Overwhelming,” he laughs slightly, trying to pinpoint exactly what he’s feeling.

“Feels that way for me, too.” You bat your eyelashes, lips glossy and swollen from all the kissing.

“Yeah?” He smiles, nudging his forehead against yours before going in for another quick kiss, and this time, you slip your hand into the band of his pants, touching him over his underwear.

“F-uck” he trembles, body shuddering while you massage his length, and he can’t even kiss you properly anymore. “T-too much.” You take your head out of his pants, muttering another apology. “No, please don’t apologize. It felt so good,” he breathes out. “Too good,” he chuckles softly while stroking your cheek. “I just think that maybe we should wait,” he suggests, and that option sounds good to you cause you’re not sure if you could go all the way with him right now without feeling like your heart was going to explode.

“Yeah, let’s wait.” You cup his face and peck his lips.

“Okay.” there’s no denying that both of you are wet and throbbing with need, but the timing was everything, and you wanted your first time to be something that you both remember as the best time of your lives, not to say it wasn’t but in the needy state you both were in taking it slow might be for the best.

He pecks your lips one last time before climbing off of you. “But if it’s not too much to ask, could we maybe sleep together tonight?” he plays with your fingers, eyeing you while he awaits your answer..

“It’s not too much to ask,” you smile, taking his hand and guiding him to your bathroom so you can both get changed and clean up before bed. Besides, Mylo and Myla had overrun his room, so he didn’t have much choice. It was your bed or the couch, and you were definitely not letting him sleep alone on the couch.

☕️.

“You’re not the only one with a girlfriend.” heeseung was up early in the morning, far earlier than you. He had already taken both dogs out for a walk and made breakfast for you both. “Looks like we both got the girl after all,” he chuckled and poked Mylo on his stomach playfully as he rolled over and wagged his tail. “We made it, boy,” he whispers softly, lying down next to him on the floor. “No more sleeping bags, no more alleys, no more winters all gone,” he cheers, playing with Mylo's floppy ears. “And all the treats you could want.” he opens the bag of treats, feeding him a little more than he probably should, but he deserves it. “Our girls are beautiful, aren’t they?” He giggles. “Most perfect girls in the world.” The whole while he’s going on and on about you and Myla, you secretly watch him from the hallway, your heart feeling full of nothing but love as he plays with Mylo. 

“Morning, hee,” you greet him, and his head snaps in your direction. He jumps up from his spot, hugging you immediately.

“Morning, my love! Mwah,” he kisses your cheek, leading you straight to the kitchen where breakfast is all laid out. “I was waiting for you.” he pulls out a chair, beckoning for you to sit down in front of the many fruits and varieties of food he cooked all by himself.

He sits beside you, practically joined at the hip, but you don’t mind, you loved being close to him. “Thank you, baby.” You kiss his cheek and he blushed. Gosh, he was so adorable.

“Try it!” He says anxiously with a smile, hoping that you liked what he prepared since he didn’t do a lot of cooking, but he tried really hard for you.

You excitedly try the first bite, and your eyes light up immediately. “Hmm, it’s delicious, hee!” You say, going back for another bite. He breathes a sigh of relief and picks up his fork to eat with you.

“Glad you like it, baby,” he kissed your cheek.

You were both eating in silence, enjoying the morning together, until you heard soft whimpering coming from under the table. You looked down to see Myla curling up around your feet. “Oh, my poor baby.” You reach under the table, patting her head softly.

“What’s wrong, girly?” Heeseung leaned down, taking in her state. She looked fine earlier. “Do you think?” You nod softly, already knowing what he’s getting at. “Hmm, should we take her to the vet?” 

“I guess” You leaned up, resting your head on heeseung’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry, it’s mylos fault.” heeseung glared over at him, who was peacefully lying down in the living room still.

“Heeseung, it’s fine,” you giggle. “She’ll be fine” 

“Yeah, she will,” he agrees as you both continue with breakfast.

An hour later, heeseung cleaned up the kitchen while you took a shower before work. Mylo was now sleeping next to Myla in their twin bed.

“I’m gonna miss you,” you pouted. Heeseung had the day off, but unfortunately, you didn’t, meaning you’d have to be away from him for eight whole hours for the first time.

“Me too, but at least I’ll be able to check on Myla.” he stood up from the couch, back hugging you. “Be safe, okay? And call me on break if you get the chance.” he kissed your neck softly, and you melted into his arms. “Gonna miss you so much, baby,” he whispers, rubbing his hands along your curves. “Think about me, yeah? I’ll for sure be thinking of you.” You’re not sure if he was aware of the way he was making your body feel so early in the morning, but you assume not when you turn around and you’re met with the most innocent smile ever.

“I will, I promise.” his face lights up, and he leans in for a kiss before sitting back down on the couch.

“Bye!” He waved cutely, and you ran back over to the couch, kissing him again before leaving. 

“Bye,” he giggles, chasing your lips again, and if you don’t leave now, you’ll be late.

☕️.

“It’s just you and me, babies.” heeseung had been laid out on the couch for the first two hours while you were gone. He’d check the time every minute and sigh when the time wasn’t going by any faster. He definitely needed a distraction; otherwise, he’d be lying down all day until you got home.

He thought of things he could do, but nothing seemed of any interest if it didn’t involve you, but then it clicked: there was one thing he could do.

He left the couch, going to take a quick shower and then prepping Myla for a trip to the vet. He figured since he was home, he might as well; the sooner she gets checked up on, the better. 

There was a vet not far from your house he remembers cause he used to pass by there every single night without fail. Luckily, it was in decent walking distance. 

Once he arrived, it took at least half an hour for him to get seen, but it was well worth the wait; besides, he was free all day anyway.

“Myla?” One of the workers called, and heeseung quickly jumped to his feet as they guided him to the back. First, they checked her weight and then put her on the table where they’d be doing her check-up. Heeseung listened to everything intently, making sure to take notes of everything she should be eating, and he nearly cried when she got her blood drawn, but other than that, everything went well. She was a healthy and very pregnant dog. He also bought her a different kind of food, one that had everything she needed, and with that, he was on his way back home.

Except where you worked, which was only a few minutes away. “You wanna go say hi to mommy?” He rubbed her chin softly. 

He made the short walk to the cafe, smiling brightly when he saw you behind the counter taking orders.

You were running around like a chicken with your head cut off, and the moment you heard the bell ring, your head snapped up in the direction, and you smiled, the tension in your shoulders deflating the moment you saw heeseung standing at the door.

“Y/n?” Sunghoon calls, and he nearly rolls his eyes when he sees who’s in the direction you’re looking in. “Alright, if you’re gonna stand there and be useless, you might as well take a break,” he jokes, and you turn to him, pushing him by his shoulder. 

“Can I really take a break?” Your eyes gleamed at Sunghoon, and of course, he couldn’t say no to you, not only you but also your boyfriend, who was giving him puppy eyes from across the cafe.

“Yes, but you’re paying for my lunch.” he pushes you out of the way and takes on the register.

“I’ll pay for your lunches for the rest of your life. Thank you, hoon, I owe you so much.” you slip off your apron and go outside with heeseung, sitting on the outdoor chairs. 

“Hi, baby,” he smiles shyly. “I was in the area, so I just thought I’d drop by.” 

“That’s so sweet, and I see you have company.” You cupped Myla's face in your hands.

“Yeah, I had so much free time. I took her in today. Every single second without you feels like hours,” he sighs.

“I’m sorry, hee, only five more hours. What did they say? Is she okay?” You said, slightly worried.

“No worries, she’s fine. We just have to keep a close eye on her and make sure she gets everything she needs,” he quickly assures you.

“Can’t believe it’s almost time for her to have her babies.” You looked down at her, and her belly was really round.

“I know.” he smiles fondly at you both. “I also can’t believe your break is almost up,” he pouts.

“Hee…” you held his hand across the table, your break wasn’t almost over but you supposed thirteen minutes to him probably felt like thirteen seconds, which admittedly it felt like that for you too.

“I know, I know, it’s just I've never really been away from you this long since we kissed, and it’s harder than I thought,” he speaks his mind.

“Yeah, it is pretty hard. I keep accidentally calling Sunghoon by your name, and he’s so over it,” you giggled, causing heeseung to let out a chuckle of his own.

Once his laughter fades out, he stares at you, appreciating every last moment he spends with you. “I love you.” he holds the back of your hands to his lips, eyes falling shut as he presses soft kisses to them.

“I love you too.” Just as his lips parted from your skin, the timer you had set went off. “I’ll see you soon, baby.” You stood up, petting Myla on the head before you went back to work. “See you soon babies.”

Heeseung stood up with you, sending you off with one last hug and kiss.

After you enter the building, he sighs, a bittersweet smile on his face as you turn around and wave to him one last time.

On his way home, he thinks that being without you would definitely take him some time to get used to.

☕️.

You were on your way home, the smile never leaving your face. The closer and closer you got, you took the bus this time so you could get there even quicker.

Heeseung and both the dogs perked up as the sound of keys jingling outside the door caught all their attention. “Mommy’s home!” heeseung rushed to the door. You could barely even see inside your apartment before he engulfed you in a hug. “Thank god you’re home,” he sighs into your hair, missing your scent.

You melt in his arms immediately, all the stress from today leaving your body the instant you feel his welcoming embrace. “Missed you,” you mumbled into his chest.

“So did we,” he parts from you, letting the dogs greet you as you enter and get undressed. “I made dinner for you.” he guided you to the kitchen where the table was set. There were a few candles lit and a vase of flowers right in the middle.

“Hee, you didn’t have to.” you looked up at the set up. It was so amazing. It looked like you were at a restaurant. You never experienced anything like this before, and it was going to make you cry.

“Why? You don’t like? I can change the-" You turn to him, hands wrapping around his shoulders before he can finish whatever his sentence was.

“I don’t just like it. I love it hee; I love you so much.” You kissed him deeply, pressing your lips on his as you stroked his cheek.

“I love you too, y/n,” he whispers as you both separate from each other.

He took out a chair for you to sit on and pulled out his own to be right next to you, just like he did in the morning.

He cut into the steak he cooked, feeding you the first piece. “How’s that taste?” He hopes it tastes good, considering what it took for him to make it.

“It’s amazing, just like you.” You pecked his lips, and with that, you both ate, and he asked you to tell him all about your day. He could listen to you talk for hours.

And he did.

He talked to you throughout dinner and dessert, even while he was prepared a bath for you.

He was currently in the living room waiting for you to come out. The kitchen was already cleaned, and all that was left to do was to patiently wait for you so you both could go to sleep together.

Which wasn’t any longer than fifteen more minutes. “Hi,” you smiled and plopped down next to him on the couch, cuddling up to his side.

“Hi,” he slipped his arm around your waist, pulling you closer. “Ready for bed?” He asked, stroking your back.

“Hmm, aren’t you showering too?” You asked curiously.

“I took one a little while before you came home,” he pressed in the face in your neck, placing a few gentle kisses there.

“No wonder you smell so good,” you chuckled, his kisses tickling your neck.

“You smell better,” he whispers in your ear, kissing just beneath the lobe, sending a shiver up your spine.

He grabbed your thigh, hoisting you into his lap, his lips never leaving your skin. “Hee,” you moan the moment you feel his tongue running along your skin.

He doesn’t even know what came over him, but he missed you so much today that he needed to feel you everywhere, every square inch he needed to memorize, so next time he was without you, he could imagine you in full detail.

You smelled so good, your skin so warm on his body, and the way you made sounds that he only ever heard come from your lips was all it took to set him off.

His hands were timidly resting on your waist as you moved your head so you could kiss his lips instead. 

The same scenario from a few nights ago, was now unfolding again on the couch. This time, the position was a little different, but the same want and need was there.

You unknowingly started to grind your hips, your core in direct contact with the bulge in his sweats. “Y/n,” he whimpers, his head falling back against the couch as you litter his pretty neck and Adam’s apple in countless kisses.

The grip on your waist was firm, his fingertips needily digging into your skin as he began guiding your movements, pressing you down flush on his growing crotch.

“Hee,” his name mindlessly slips from your tingling lips as you lose yourself and succumb to an undiscovered yet enticing pleasure.

“You feel so good, Angel,” he groans softly. His hips evidently had a mind of theirs as he bucked them up into you, softly grinding against your heat.

“Ahh,” you mewl and hide your face in his chest. You’ve never once made a sound like that before, and you were slightly self-conscious until you heard him let out one quite similar to yours. 

His hands slid up your shirt, cautiously roaming your skin and being drawn to your soft breasts almost on instinct. 

The tank top he was wearing gave you access to kiss and bite at his shoulder as you rubbed yourself on him desperately.

“Seungie.” Hearing you whimpering yet another nickname that you made for him sent his mind into overdrive, the length in his pants growing harder every second.

He rolled your nipples between his fingers, giving you a different kind of pleasure. “I’m here, baby,” he cried out, the heat growing hotter and your breaths getting heavier the longer you rut against each other.

You ran your fingers through his hair desperate to feel his lips on yours once more. You lifted your head off his shoulder to find his soft pink lips. 

The pace of your movements grew more rapid, and almost instantly, you both knew you wouldn’t be able to stop now, too lost in the feeling of each other's bodies. “Yes,” he hissed against your lips, meeting each of your thrusts in perfect sync.

You both pulled away, staring into each other's eyes, panting. Your hair was messy, and you were both out of breath, but your lower bodies never ceased movement until, in the corner of heeseung's eye, he noticed Mylo and Myla sleeping in their dog bed.

You leaned in for another kiss, but he quickly pointed to them. “Oops,” you giggled silently, and heeseung hoisted your legs securely around his waist, his hands on your bottom as he carried you to your bedroom, making sure to shut the door.

The air was still very much tense despite the minor pause. The bulge in his sweats was evident, as well as the wet patch on the crotch of them.

He followed your line of vision, blushing at how wet his pants were due to both your combined arousal. “Sorry,” you whisper awkwardly.

“Don’t be.” he closes the distance, kissing away the awkwardness. Your hand gripped the hem of his black tank top, tugging it upward. “Take it off, baby.” You do just that, and slip it over his head.

It wasn’t the first time you saw him like this, but given the setting you initially saw him shirtless in, thoughts of attraction were the last thing on your mind, but now.

Now, it was so different. Your hands were glued to his body, roaming his soft, freshly washed skin. Everything about him was absolutely perfect.

He blushed as he felt your small, dainty fingers touching him everywhere. “Your turn?” He tilts his head, waiting for your answer, and you nod your head, struggling to pull your hands away from him long enough for him to take your sleep shirt off.

“Yes,” you mutter quietly and his breath hitches in his throat. Just the idea of seeing you topless admittedly made him twitch in his sweats.

Button by button, one by one, he opened your shirt, revealing the most perfect beauty he’d ever laid his eyes on.

You, in your full beauty, no clothing in the way to block the magnificent sight before him.

He gulps, sliding the material off your shoulders, his eyes blown wide as they scan every inch of you. 

Cupping both his hands over your chest, he groans at the softness of your breasts, and you whimper quietly in his mouth as he bends down to kiss you.

One of your hands was back in its rightful place, his left pec, while the other massaged over the tent in his sweatpants.

He moans continuously in your mouth, bucking his hips into your hand over and over again until he feels that he needs your touch skin on skin.

He grabbed your wrist, stopping you. “Something wrong?” You breathe against his lips.

“Mm-mm, just,” he mumbles back, guiding your hand inside his underwear so he can feel you touching his flesh. “Perfect.” he whispers and cups your cheek, his other hand still pleasuring your right breast as he deepens the kiss.

Your hand shyly runs along his length. He’s so warm, pulsing to the touch, and the glide of your hand feels so slick as you work him from tip to base.

Your nails rake down his chest, gripping the band of his sweats to pull them down.

He quickly helps you slip them down, kicking them off the rest of the way, leaving him in nothing but the boxers you had bought him, but he isn’t half as shy for you to see them as he was in the supermarket. If anything, he wanted you to see and not just the boxers but everything that hid underneath them.

“My turn?” You ask with a giggle, and just like you, he nods, smiling.

“Your turn” he hooks his thumbs inside your shorts, slipping them down your beautiful legs.

He gasped when he was met with your bare body. He wasn’t expecting you to be nude under those shorts, and for a split second, he was just staring at your core glistening in the moonlit bedroom, and you just kept getting more and more beautiful by the second.

“You like what you see?” You say playfully, knocking him out of his daze as he frantically nods his head. 

“So much, you’re so perfect,” the words came out of his mouth in one long drawn-out moan, flustering you to a point you thought was impossible after he had seen undressed. “I need you.” he drew your body as close to his as possible and kissed you while his hands mapped out your body.

“Then have me. I’m all yours.” he guided your hands to the waistband of his boxers, motioning that it was okay for you to take them off. 

Your hands were slightly shaking with nerves and excitement as you peeled down the waistband, revealing all of him and he was

Beautiful.

“Like what you see?” He raises his brow, teasing you the same way you did to him, and somehow, the moment was both equally playful as it was sensual.

You’re so glad you both waited cause right now, everything was perfect, and before it even ended, you knew it was going to be something you’d remember for a lifetime. “You're beautiful, hee.” You kissed his chest, taking in everything. Nothing about him was flawed. Everything was perfect, even the little mole on his ear.

He hid his face in your shoulder and hugged you, strumming the length of your back with his soft fingers as you did the same. “Love you,” he pecks the top of your head.

“I love you too.” Without another word spoken, he took you to the bed, laying you flat and getting under the covers with you resting between your legs in the space you made for him.

He stroked your cheek, his eyes scanning every breathtaking feature on your face.

Your hands wrapped around his torso, pulling him into you as you shared another kiss.

He grunted softly at the contact of your lower bodies rubbing together. The feeling was so intense that it made his heart race in his chest.

You gasped, feeling him firmly pressing himself between your legs, thrusting his hips continuously as his length slipped through your glossy folds.

Only seconds after he climbed on top of you, you couldn’t take it anymore. You needed to become one with the man you so deeply loved. “Hee, will you be my first?” 

He leans back, his eyes blinking open slowly as his movements come to a stop. “Yes, I will,” he whispers, eyes full of nothing but pure genuine love. “With great honor,” he rubs the tip of his nose against yours. 

“And y/n, will you be mine as well?” His eyes search yours, waiting for what he knows will be a yes answer.

“Yes!” You answer so enthusiastically that it makes him giggle, and he loves you so much that it almost makes him cry.

With one last kiss of approval, you hook your legs around his waist as he rests his arms beside you and angles himself to be perfectly aligned with you.

He pushes his hips forward, slowly sinking into your welcoming warmth, and he sighs in contentment as he feels you opening up just for him. “Y/n,” A gentle moan sneaks past his lips as he slips inside of you with ease with the help of your body's natural lubricants.

“Oh, hee.” You circle his shoulders, your mouth parting open and letting out the prettiest sounds he’s ever heard.

He feels so good. The warmth of your body, the way you hugged him in all the right places, and the nonstop calls of his name let him know you were feeling just as good as he did.

And you absolutely were. You felt so full in your heart, your mind, and your body. He held you so close as he made you one with him.

With every thrust, you professed your love for each other, whether that be with words, loving touches, or sounds of pleasure; you were both so in tune with one another that even at the height of pleasure, you were side by side on the edge of experiencing the greatest euphoria of all.

“You feel so amazing, Seung.” he locked his lips with yours, sealing your words off with a kiss.

“You do too, my angel, my sweet angel.” he twitched within your walls with each of his thrust. The motion was smooth, making it all the more pleasurable as your fluids mixed together and made the sweetest sounds between your conjoined bodies.

Your silky walls fluttered around his throbbing girth, tightening even more with each second that passed.

Both your moans increased in pitch, your breaths becoming erratic, as well as his movements and the constant rubbing of his abdomen against your sensitive nub brought you and him to the brink of bliss. The squeezing of your core sucking him in made him feel lightheaded as he went in and out. The sensation sending both of you the end as you covered one another in the essence of love. “I love you, y/n,” he confessed to you through a messy kiss.

“I love you, heeseung.” The number of times you both shared I love you’s was endless as the pleasure raced through every fiber of your bodies. He thrusts slowly, bringing you both down from cloud 9.

Your bodies were covered in sweat; you could barely breathe. There was a string of saliva connecting you both together, and the amount of sheer love you both felt in the moment was unlike anything either of you have ever experienced. It brought tears to both of your eyes.

He stayed still, hugging your tired body in his strong arms, never ever wanting to let you go.

You both stayed like that for a while, just sharing each other's breath and feeling your heartbeats sync and become one with the other.

He rested on his elbows, looking into your eyes and gripping your hands, clasping them with his cause. No matter what, he still just couldn’t get close enough to you, but when you kissed him, he felt complete. Every part of him was touching you, and every part of you was touching him. “Thank you for being my first, hee,” you speak up first, whispering softly to him in the vulnerable state you were both in. “It was everything I could have ever dreamed of.”

“You’re welcome. I’m so happy I can be that for you. Thank you for letting me be your first, and thank you for being my first,” he rested his forehead on yours, nudging you softly.

“You’re welcome.” The sincerity of your voice makes him melt, and he thinks after this, somehow, he loves you even more. “I love you, coffee,” you smile, stroking the back of his hand with your intertwined fingers.

“I love you, cream.”

F I N

Tap coffee for a surprise ☕️

Permanent taglist:🏷️ @hee-pster @hoyeonheeseung @furious-eagle @heesitation @moon7jay

Coffee & cream taglist:🏷️ @petalsofink @parksunghoonsgf @shiningsunseonyu @cheruluv @iamliacamila @boutyouwonu @fluerz @ethelia @jungwonx @t1nywoniee @eskopiganja @feicraycrayy @ashiitex @valiantcyclevoid @mayah1 @dunnoshim @hanjisunginc @skzenhalove @msauthor @mayah1 @parksunghoonsgf @wonuqrtz @browniestraykidshiteu @lovely-red2 @kaykay11sworld @seuomo @meiskra @bellonahulwah @heeseat @Ihspeachie @xrr-s4sha @Iprww @kgneptun @donghyckl bold can’t be tagged

---

disgustingly good oh my lord

Tidal Waves

siren!lee heeseung x reader [afab]

genre: smut

concept: you've spent your whole life on the water. it's a part of you, it's who you are. at this point, it feels like the ocean is an old friend and there's nothing left in it that you don't know. how wrong you are...

w/c: 11.2k

warning: siren au, monster au, boating, water / open water, attempted / almost drowning, sea creature, tentacles; sexually explicit content; dub con, fingering, light oral play (f. receiving), monster tongue, tentacle sex, clit / nipple play, inhuman genitalia (mentions of a sheath / concealed genitals), unprotected sex, mentions of squirting, creampie

Standing out on the bow, you breath in the salty sea air greedily. The air is hot and thick, balmy with the sea breeze as the weather turns. It’s so close to boating season you can almost taste it, eager to get out on the water again. The ocean laps at the front of the boat, beckoning it forward into the waves, the ropes tying it to the dock keeping it from floating out into open water. You sigh softly to yourself, letting your eyes scan the marina, knowing you aren’t the only one excited to get out there. 

“Ready to go?” Jay asks, and you turn away from the water reluctantly. “C’mon, it’s getting late,” he tells you, reaching a hand out towards you. You reluctantly take the hand offered to you, climbing off the railing off the boat. The sailboat, despite being in good condition, creaks as you step down, using Jay’s grip on your hand to balance yourself as you come down. Your sneakered feet hit the deck and he lets go, nodding to the dock. “Let’s get going,” he tells you and you tuck your hands into the front pocket of your windbreaker. 

The ocean glitters silver and gold as the sun coasts down towards the horizon, you and your cousin stepping off the boat and onto the dock. Jungwon and Sunoo are already waiting for the two of you, the four of you having spent the whole day cleaning up the boat to get it sea ready for when you’re allowed to take it out onto the ocean. 

You and Jay grew up here, right on the ocean, only growing up a couple of houses away from one another. Without any siblings of your own, you grew up more like siblings than cousins, running back and forth to each other’s houses, playing in the mud and the beach and the marina. The marina, that you’ve called home ever since you were young enough to climb aboard a boat. Your home away from home, the rocking of the boat, the salty smell of the ocean familiar and comforting. 

Your family are sailors, at least they used to be. A long, long time ago. Now half the marina practically belongs to your family, having taken ownership of the docks some several generations ago. You and Jay are the heirs in a long line of sea-bearing folk, the kind of people who just can’t imagine their lives away from the ocean. The two of you have been around boats your whole lives, and this sailboat is Jay’s, the first of many you’re sure. A 20th birthday gift from your parents and his, more cherished to him than his own car. 

As the weather turns towards hot days and warmer nights you fully expect to spend long days out on the ocean with Jay, and your two best friends Jungwon and Sunoo, old school friends of yours. You have no doubts that as soon as Jay’s able to break away from the dock, that’s all you’re going to be doing. It’s half the reason you’ve been so eager to help him with his boat, you don’t have one of your own yet (your parents keep hinting that maybe this year will be the year) but Jay would never leave you stranded on land. And thank God for that. 

“When do you think, hyung?” Jungwon asks, falling into step with Jay as the four of you head towards the parking lot along the edge of the water, further and further away from the siren’s call of the ocean. 

“Next week,” he says assuredly and Jungwon grins, his dimples digging into his cheeks. “She’s almost ready, she just needs a little more work. I’ll spend every day on her if I have to.” 

“Count me in,” you tell him and he glances over his shoulder at you, smiling. “Hey, if I help we can get her sea worthy twice as fast. I’d kill for that.” 

“Never met two people so obsessed with the ocean,” Sunoo comments, tipping his head back to stare up at the sky. “You guys act like you’ll die if you don’t get to be on the water.” 

“Maybe we will,” Jay retorts. “We’re sea bearing folk, Sunoo-yah.” 

“You have legs, don’t you?” He retorts, dropping his head back down to look critically at Jay. Jay rolls his eyes, climbing the stairs up to the parking lot.

You follow them with a light laugh, pausing at the top of the stairs. You turn to look out at the ocean again, watching the waves rise up, crest and then fall back down. It’s a calm day on the ocean, the boats all shift quietly against their docks, ropes twisting slightly in the breeze. You take in another deep breath, smiling softly to yourself as you let your eyes scan the horizon.

A dark shape catches your attention, out of the corner of your eye. You turn your head towards it, seeing what looks almost like a figure along a rock formation at the edge of the marina. You lean forward, curling your fingers around the railing of the stairs to steady yourself, squinting your eyes to try and figure out what it is. People don’t swim in the marina, it’s too dangerous with all the boats and other sea vehicles around. But it looks so much like a person.

The sun is nearly on the horizon now, casting the form you’re looking at into shadow, a black mass that looks like the head and shoulders of a person. You can’t make out any specific features but it moves suddenly, twisting like it can feel your eyes on it. When it does, you flinch back, surprised by the sudden movement, only for it to drop down into the water, submerging itself in the waves. It disappears just like that, causing you to blink hard, shaking your head, unsure of what you just saw. 

“Yah, Y/N!” Jay calls out and you turn away from the railing. “C’mon, my appa’s expecting us,” he reminds you. You nod in agreement, stepping away from the stairs, jogging over to meet them at the car. 

Out in the water, the figure lifts their eyes just above the water, watching your figure run away from the railing. You disappear and they slip underneath the waves. 

The four of you end up on the water within the week, thanks to yours and Jay’s tenacity. The two of you manage to pull the boat together in just a few days, new ropes, a clean deck, even washing down the outside of her. Her name, ORANGE FLOWER, gleams golden where it’s been painted onto the hull. Jay grins at you, just as excited about getting on the water as you.

When you get out onto the water, the day is perfect. Sun high, water blue and calm, a warm breeze weaving through the air, tossing your hair around. You sit out on the bow as Jay starts the boat up to take the four of you out. Jungwon and Sunoo both cheer when she turns over easily, Jay guiding the white and orange boat out into the water confidently. You glance back over at your cousin, finding him through the windshield, his sunglasses over his eyes, leaning back in his seat like he’s done this a thousand times. At this point, he might have. 

The bow cuts through the water like nothing, leaving a wide wake of foam behind you. The coast gets further and further away and you lean back, arms on the railing, the sun on your face. This is what the summer is to you, the ocean beneath you, the purr of your cousin’s boat and not a single thing that you need to be doing otherwise. 

Once in open water, Jay and Jungwon go about the exact thing they came out here to do, and that’s fish. You’re not much for fishing but it’s an old sailor's pastime, so while they try to reel in a catch, you and Sunoo decide to do some sunbathing on the deck. The sun beams down on you brightly, but the ocean breeze keeps you from getting uncomfortably hot as the two of you lay down on the deck together, sunglasses on and coated in a layer of sun screen. 

The ocean rocks the boat slightly, a lullaby that’s almost enough to take you under. You fight the urge to sleep, knowing better than to fall asleep under a full sun. It’s too familiar, too comforting, you relax against your towel, thinking about how these days are so fleeting. 

A sudden lurch to the starboard side causes you to sit up, Sunoo as well. The two of you glance back towards the stern. 

“Not us!” Jungwon calls out from the back of the boat. You immediately get up to look, leaning over the railing to see if you can see whatever bumped the boat. It felt big, a little too big for your own comfort, Jungwon and Sunoo quickly doing the same while Jay starts the boat. Better safe than sorry, if you guys have managed to park near a particularly aggressive fish. 

You don’t think there’s many fish in this area that are big enough to lurch a boat this size though so you’re not quite sure what might be doing it. You push your glasses up to the top of your head, searching around the water while Jay pulls out a little further. Sunoo and Jungwon both depart from the side of the boat, content with Jay taking them away from where you previously were but you can’t stop yourself from looking around in the water, still trying to figure it out. 

As you pull away, you lift your gaze to see something rise up out of the water. You squint, trying to see it better despite the way Jay is pulling you away quickly. It’s a… person. This far out? You blink hard, sure you’re seeing things but it’s undeniably human, with golden skin and red hair. The further you get the harder it is to see them until they’re too small to make out any features and they slip back beneath the waves. 

“Did you see it?” Sunoo asks, and you tear your gaze from the ocean to see Sunoo at your shoulder. “What hit the boat?” He elaborates and you open your mouth only to close it, shaking your head. 

“No,” you tell him. “I thought I did but… we’re too far away now.” 

“Must’ve been big,” Sunoo comments, walking away from you, towards the helm. 

“Yeah,” you agree. “Must’ve been.” 

You manage to convince yourself that it wasn’t a person. The boat was far enough out that it would’ve been nearly impossible for someone to swim out to you, no matter the calmness of the water. You definitely saw something, you’re just not quite sure what it was. It doesn’t matter though, nothing else hit the boat all day long and when Jay brought the boat back into port that night you all went home a little tanner than you started the day, sporting a pretty decent haul of fish. It was a good day and you don’t want to sully that with whatever strange hallucination you might’ve had out in the ocean. You drink two gatorades that night to fight dehydration and ignore it. 

You don’t go back out on the ocean until a week later, and the weather isn’t nearly as nice. It’s still good for a day out but the sky is overcast and the ocean is a little less clear and calm. Still, you and Jay persist to spend some time out on the ocean, Jungwon and Sunoo sitting this one out. 

Really, the only reason you and Jay are willing to go out on a day like this is because you’ve both had a long week. Your parents have been harping on the both of you consistently, complaining about the fact that the two of you only seem to care about the ocean, about boating, when you should be thinking more seriously about your futures. The two of you met at the marina and didn’t even have to say anything to each other before descending the stairs and climbing aboard the old sailboat, ready to take on the ocean no matter what the weather looked like. 

“Kind of ridiculous, isn’t it?” Jay comments, guiding the boat out into open water. You’re sitting in his copilot's seat today, knees pulled up, feet on the edge of the chair. You look over at him. “They raised us. They brought us out to the marina almost every day when we were kids. They didn’t really think we wouldn’t want to do this, did they?” You snort to yourself, looking back out the windshield. “It’s who we are now.” 

“I know,” you agree. “You ever think you could live away from the ocean?” 

“Never,” Jay answers you immediately. “I’m not built like that.” 

“Me neither,” you reply. 

You’re well out in open water by the time Jay has stopped the boat, and you get out of the seat, out from behind the safe walls of the helm, walking out onto the deck. The clouds are moving in faster now but neither of you pay it any mind as Jay joins you at the bow of the ship, sitting down at the edge of the railing. It’s already starting to get late, you can’t be out too late or your parents are both going to be furious with you, but you’ll stay out as long as you dare, breathing in the ocean and letting the gentle sound of rolling waves calm you down. 

The boat rocks suddenly, a little harder than if it was just the waves, and Jay climbs off the bow to get back behind the wheel. You move to get off the bow, but the boat suddenly lurches again, causing your foot to slip out from underneath you. 

“Jay!” You scream, and he turns just in time to watch you fall off the bow. He scrambles across the deck to try and grab you but he’s too late. You splash down into the water, right into the swirling waves. 

“Fuck,” he curses, pulling his jacket off to dive into the water after you.

You know how to swim, of course you do. You grew up on the water, you’re a very strong, capable swimmer, but it’s hard to get your bearings as the water tosses you around, the waves throwing you around like you weigh nothing at all. The weight of your clothes isn’t helping, your jeans tight to your skin, your windbreaker practically strangling you as you try to turn over and find which way is up. You’re thankful for the hand that grabs your arm, hauling you up to the surface. 

You cling to Jay, trying to catch your breath as he tows you back towards the boat. You try to keep up with him, still weighed down by your clothes and the water. He’s just gotten to the ladder on the side of the boat, trying to pull you up with him when something wraps around your ankle, pulling you down. 

You scream, trying to cling to Jay’s hand, pulling yourself up and Jay reaches down to take both of your hands but whatever has you is stronger. Whatever it is, it tightens its grip around your ankle, pulling harder and harder. Jay struggles to pull you from the water but he can’t. A slithery, slippery feeling wraps higher and higher up your leg, until it’s tangled around your knee, nearly your thigh and you can’t hold onto Jay any longer. 

Your wet hands slip from his and you fall beneath the surface again. You’re tugged beneath the roiling waves, further and further, until the surface is distant and warped. You can’t breathe, you’re panicking, looking around frantically for what might have you. 

When you look at your leg you see a long, red tentacle wrapped all the way up your leg, suckers pressing down into your jeans, the strong muscles flexing under the slick skin. You reach down to try and wedge it off of you, but you’re getting weak, your struggling has left you too tired to fight back. As it is, you can’t breathe and the lack of oxygen is bringing you further and further down, your vision blurring at the edges.

You hit the floor of the ocean, sand and rocks under your body, under your hands. The tentacle deftly unwraps from around your leg but you’re too tired to swim up. Your eyes fall shut, the world going black around you. 

You come to, coughing up salty ocean water, turning over to try to spit it all up. Your body aches, your lungs burn as you try to take in a deep breath, chest heaving. You roll back onto your back once you can breathe again, too weak to even try and get up. You blink up at the sky, which has turned dark, stars staring down at you. You’re lying on sand, you can feel it underneath you, sticking to your wet body, getting in your hair and all over your clothes. You swallow around the sickness in your stomach, not sure you’re not going to throw up. Your head is still spinning, you drop your head back against the sand, trying to calm the racing of your heart, closing your eyes. 

“Don’t do that,” a soft voice advises and you blink your eyes open again. The night sky is blocked out by a dark, shadowy figure leaning over the top of you. “You might fall asleep. And I don’t really want to have to bring you back to shore again if you get washed out to sea.” 

“Again?” You croak. 

“Again,” they whisper. Gentle fingers brush over your cheek as they hum softly. “It’d be an awful shame for something as beautiful as you to get swept out to sea. I’m sure your family would miss you terribly.” 

“My⁠—” You sit up suddenly, startling them away from you. “Jay! He must be so worried.” 

“Don’t worry,” they say, but there’s a disappointed curl to their full lips. Their full lips that you can see now that you’re both sitting up. “He’s fine. I’m sure by now everyone’s looking for you. It won’t be long now.” 

The words they say go completely over your head as you take in their face. They’re undeniably handsome, with cherry red hair that falls into their eyes messily, still damp looking from the water. Their eyes are big and round, the most curious shade of dark gray. Your eyes travel over their high cheekbones, perfect nose that tapers to a soft point, their full, pink lips. Your gaze drifts down to the rest of them, their expression softening into one of intrigue as they lean back to let you get a better look at them. 

“Oh my god,” you gasp, finally taking them in in their entirety. Past their long neck, beautifully sculpted chest and toned stomach their golden skin melts into slippery, slick skin, the same cherry red as their hair. Past their hips is nothing but a messy tangle of tentacles, each adorned with suckers from base to tip. Your eyes run up and down their body, unable to believe what you’re looking at. A tentacle nudges your still sneaker clad foot, causing you to reflexively pull away. When you look back at their face they smile at you, with a mouthful of sharp teeth. Your breath catches. 

“What’s wrong?” They coo. “Not quite the prince charming you were hoping I would be.” They lean further over you, arms coming up to cage you against the sand. You stare up at them with wide eyes as they lean over you. You can feel their tentacles crawling over your jean clad legs, the memory of being pulled beneath the waves rising up in your mind. “You must be disappointed,” they tease you, two of their long, slick extremities around your ankles. 

“You pulled me under. You didn’t save me,” you say and they lift a brow at you. “You’re the reason I almost drowned.” 

“I wouldn’t have killed you,” they assure you, lifting a hand to brush their fingers over your cheek again. “I don’t kill people. Why would I? What would I get out of it?” They sigh, letting their fingers trace your jaw, down the side of your neck. “Letting you live, we both win.” 

“How do you win?” You ask, voice shaking. They smile down at you, gently cupping the side of your neck. 

“Are you not dangerously curious about me?” They ask. When they lean down, your breath catches again, their face so close you can feel the ghost of their breath over your lips and cheeks. “Or am I not interesting enough for you?” 

“Wh- what are you?” You finally gasp out. 

“I knew you’d ask,” they whisper, grinning down at you. “But it seems I don’t have the time.” You turn your head when he lifts his head, eyes sliding to the side. There are flashlights darting across the sand, a collection of tall crags and rocks still keeping the two of you hidden for a little while longer as they call out your name. When you turn back to them, they pull back, tentacles releasing your legs. “If you’re still curious, I’m sure you’ll find me again,” they tell you. They depart from you entirely, sliding down the sand and into the water. 

“Wait⁠—!” You call out but they disappear from view, into the inky abyss of the ocean. You can’t see them any longer and the voices and flashlights are getting closer. You turn towards them, struggling to get to your feet so you can meet them. You glance once more over your shoulder, sure you can feel their eyes on you even if you can’t see them. You swallow down your feeling of unease, stepping out from around the rocks to meet the search party. 

Everyone is, understandably, shocked and overjoyed that you’re okay. Jay cries on you, which might be the most emotion you’ve ever seen your cousin portray over you, when he meets you in the marina parking lot, which is less than a mile from the beach you washed up on. The beach that is coated in rock and crags, with only scarce sections of sand with enough room for you to wash up on. 

“You’re really lucky you didn’t get torn up on those rocks,” the medic that patches you up in the parking lot of the marina tells you, your legs hanging over the end of the ambulance. “You got out of that with very few scratches. I’m surprised.” Your hands are torn up, parts of your clothes too, but you’re nearly entirely unharmed otherwise. 

“Yeah,” you agree. “I got really lucky.” 

Some people start throwing around the word ‘miracle’ and you start to wonder if they’re right. After, you don’t know what else you would call that… creature that saved you. 

Well, “saved” you.

Your parents hardly let you out of their sight for at least a week after your “accident,” and you’re banned from the marina for at least two. You nearly threw a fit, being forced to stay away from the water feels like a death sentence, you can’t stand the idea of it. 

“You nearly drowned!” Your mother reasoned. 

“And I’ve been on boats countless times! This has never happened before! It was just an accident.” 

“An accident that could very well happen again. You’re not going to the marina.” 

They only allow you to go to the beach, a mile from the marina, during clear days. It’s a small consolation but the first day you can finally get out of the house and to the beach, by yourself, is a god sent. You feel like you can breathe again when you see the clear blue water, when you smell the salty sea air, when you feel the balmy ocean breeze on your skin again. You’re eager to get in the water again, even if it is only on the beach. 

The beach in question is quiet. It’s not much of a destination, being mostly covered in rocks and crags, little tide pools along the edge, small sections of sand being the only beachy parts. Still, it’s better than nothing. You wander over the crags with careful feet, your beach bag hanging from your shoulder, sunglasses on top of your head. 

You find the place where you “washed up” easily enough, even if it does look different in the daytime. You plop yourself down on the sand, looking out at the ocean, letting the sound of the waves and the birds overhead calm you down. You feel like you again, a full two weeks away from the ocean starting to make you feel insane. Even in the winter time you find yourself at the edge of the water, watching the waves crash against the coast even if you can’t be in it. 

Part of you hopes you see them again. You have so many questions, even more reservations, but they weren’t wrong. You are so curious about them, what they are, what they want. Your eyes start to scan the horizon, almost hoping that you see their familiar figure again, the cut of their broad shoulders against the sky, their vivid red hair appearing out of the blue ocean. You don’t see them though and you pull your legs up towards your chest, wrapping your arms around them as you look a little further around you. 

When you look to the right, you see a cordoned off area, yellow and black rope with a sign warning people to KEEP OUT, HIGH TIDE COVE. There are a lot of places around here like that, when the tide comes it can completely submerge the floor, the caves and coves around the beaches, making them dangerous to swimmers and beach goers. You, however, look past the sign to the cove it’s blocking off, the wall of rock that’s carved into a slight arch, the cliff overhead hanging above it. You can’t see much inside, it’s a well disguised hole in the wall of the beach. Carefully, you get to your feet. 

You walk across the hot sand, glancing around to make sure no one sees you. There’s hardly anyone around, only a few people much, much further down, by the actual sandy, beachy areas of the coastline, families and couples playing in the water. You turn back towards the rope, ducking underneath it. 

The rocks here are sharper, more difficult to navigate, but you manage to get over them and not hurt yourself, shimmying around the wall of rock that separates the cove from the rest of the beach. You’re not quite sure what you expect to find over here, but this seems as good a place as any for some kind of mythical creature to be hiding out in plain sight.

It’s damp and cool, blocked out from the sun with the cave walls around either side, the cliff overhead that reaches out towards the sea, a towering section of rock in front of the opening of the cave keeping the cliff up above suspended. The rocky floor is worn smooth here from high tide and you wander around, looking at the way the water laps at the edge of the cove. You can see where the stone slowly descends down into the waters, only to abruptly drop off not far from the edge. You wrap your arms around yourself, suddenly chilled as a breeze floats through. It’s while you’re looking up at the high ceiling of the cave when you hear something in the water. 

You turn back to see the water rippling, splashing against the stone, only for something to rise out of the waves. Your heart lodges itself in your throat when you see them again, red hair and golden skin, pushing their hair away from their face as they heave themselves up onto the ledge of rock. They haven’t even noticed you yet, shaking themselves off as they run their hands over their face, wiping water from their eyes. 

You shuffle towards them, going still when they suddenly stop moving. Abruptly, they turn towards you, startling you. You take a reflexive step back, a smile slowly making their way across their lips. 

“Hello, beautiful,” they greet you. “I’d started to think you’d forgotten about me.” 

Forgotten about them? Never. Impossible even, the idea that you might forget about whatever they are. It’s not every day you’re saved by a human… octopus… thing. Nearly every day you’ve thought about them, the desire to see the water nearly as bad as to figure out just what they are. 

“No,” you assure them and their smile gets bigger, sharp teeth on full display. “Uh… you never…” you walk closer, hesitantly. Turning towards you, their bottom half slips beneath the water again, making them appear almost human. You walk even closer, until you’re right in front of them. They look up at you from under their lashes and you carefully lower yourself down, sitting in front of them, your beach bag, sunglasses and sandals set aside. “You never told me what you are,” you finish, folding your legs up against your chest. 

“No, I didn’t,” they agree. “But wouldn’t you like to know my name first?” They offer. 

“Yes,” you agree. A name would certainly humanize them a little. You can’t keep thinking of them as a creature forever. 

“It’s Heeseung,” he practically purrs, leaning against the rock ledge. “And you are?” 

“Y/N,” you reply. 

“What a pretty name,” he tells you and you smile softly, shyly. “And you came back to see me? Well, I can’t say I’m not honored,” he says, reaching out to touch your ankle gently. You bite your lip as he runs the backs of his fingers up and down your shin gently. “But you came here for answers, didn’t you?” He lifts himself slightly out of the water, exposing where his human form meets his animal half, your breath catching when two tentacles snake out of the water, one of them replacing his fingers on your skin. You resist the urge to flinch away and he smiles at you. “Curious, aren’t you?” 

“I… have so many questions,” you admit and he leans further over the rocks, tilting his head at you. 

“Humans are so curious about everything,” he says. “It’s an admirable quality. It’s what brought you to me, after all.” He hums, lifting his eyes up as he thinks. “Well, there’s no actual answer as to what I am. I’m sure I’m far from the prince charming depiction humans have made others like me out to be,” he sighs. “What do you call them? Mermaids?” He teases you and you nod a bit shyly, still painfully aware of his tentacle stroking over your leg. 

“That’s… close, I guess,” you admit. “But you don’t look anything like that.” 

“No, I’m a little more… monstrous,” he says. The tentacle touching you suddenly wraps around your leg, pulling you to the edge of the pool. You yelp, surprised to suddenly be dragged towards him. With you much closer to him Heeseung leans in, your legs suddenly submerged in the water up to your knees. Your breath catches, your hands grabbing the stone to keep yourself upright. The tentacle weaves its way further up your leg, to your knee, stroking along the outside of it instead, the suckers pressing into your bare skin. “Are you scared of me, beautiful?” 

You should be, you think. Those tentacles of his are far too strong, obviously he can do whatever he wants with you. And those teeth, they’re so sharp and mildly disconcerting, it sort of worries you what he would even need teeth like that for. You’re clearly at his mercy like this, you should probably be more scared of him. But for some reason, the humanity in Heeseung’s eyes, the gentle way he touches you, the sweet way he speaks to you, it doesn’t scare you. You’re not afraid of him. 

“No,” you admit and he smirks. 

“How sweet,” he comments. “Creatures like me go by many names, and we’ve been confused with lots of other things too. Krakens, for example, monstrous things they are. I’m not that dangerous though.” He shifts to rest one arm on the other side of you, caging you against the stone. You swallow but don’t push him away, not that you think you could. Instead, you part your knees and he slips between them immediately, leaning up towards you with that dastardly little smirk on his lips. “No, I think humans mostly refer to things like me as… sirens.” He whispers and your heart stutters in your chest. 

Sirens. Sirens, creatures known to sing songs so alluring no one could ever deny them. They’re particularly well known for drawing sailors to their deaths, be it from crashing their boats into cliffs or literally eating them. To say that you suddenly feel less safe in his grasp would be a devastating understatement but Heeseung merely tilts his head at you, still smirking. 

“Did I say something wrong?” He teases you, clearly knowing exactly what you’re thinking. 

“You said you don’t kill people,” you say and he hums in agreement. “You don’t… eat them, do you?” 

“Eat them? Not in any literal sense,” he replies. “No, I’m afraid that any eating I do is a bit more… metaphorical.” His hands touch your thighs, gently easing them further apart. Your breath catches as you realize his meaning, his hands drifting inward, between your legs. “Oh, you do understand what I’m saying, don’t you?” Heeseung teases, pressing the backs of two of his fingers against the crotch of your swim bottoms. 

The knuckles of his fingers drag up and down the center of your bottoms, pressing right into your clit every time he strokes back up. You will yourself to stay still, not wanting to play right into his hands. Is this what sirens are actually like? Supposedly sirens are supposed to be unimaginably beautiful, or at the very least, glamoured to be beautiful. Irresistible, even. Heeseung certainly fits the bill, so is this what they really want? 

“So all those stories, about sirens, they’re all⁠—” 

“Did you really think they were true?” Heeseung asks, looking at you from under his lashes. “Beautiful, they’re nothing but wise tales, folklore. It’s a nasty thing they did to us, humans. I guess it’s just easier to portray us as the bad guys when the alternative is…” The tentacle around your leg suddenly comes unraveled, instead sliding across the stone to wrap around your wrists. You gasp as both of your wrists are tightly held, pulling you closer to him. Heeseung leans up towards your face, smiling in the most sinister of ways. “They’d have to admit they rather enjoyed everything we did to them.” 

Your breath comes out in heavy pants as he hooks his fingers under the material of your swim bottom, pulling them aside. Cool air ghosts over your bare cunt, making you shiver. He leans back to look, humming softly. 

“I’ll never quite understand it, the way a human’s sex is so vulnerable. Why, it takes nothing at all for me to touch it.” Heeseung demonstrates this point by running his fingertips up and down your slit, which is getting wetter by the second. You struggle against the tentacles holding your wrists, Heeseung tsking softly. “Now, now, don’t struggle. I’ll make you feel good, beautiful,” he assures you, lifting his other hand to spread you open. You whimper as he exposes you to him, catching his lower lip between his sharp teeth. “It’s been too long since I’ve been with a human. I almost forgot how wet you get.” He spreads your slick around where it’s leaking from your hole, then carefully eases his fingers inside of you. 

You gasp, hips jerking as you’re filled with his thick fingers. Heeseung looks up at you, studying your expressions as he pushes in and in and in until his fingers knuckle deep inside of you. You’re warm and wet inside, your eyelids are fluttering, chest heaving as pleasure courses through you. It’s almost painful, the way you’re stretched around him with such little prep, but so satisfying at the same time. 

Slowly, agonizingly, Heeseung pulls his fingers back out, only to slowly push them back in. You can feel the texture of his fingers, the bumps of his knuckles as he slowly fingers you. His attention bounces between the expressions you make, eyes rolling, mouth opening, soft moans spilling from your lips, and the way your cunt stretches to accommodate him. More and more fluid comes from your pussy, lubricating the slide, pooling around the base of his fingers the longer it goes on. You try to cant your hips up against his hand, but a pair of tentacles slither their way around your legs, all the way up to your thighs, keeping you pinned down against the stone. You whine, unable to move. 

“It’s important to be patient, beautiful,” Heeseung tells you, spreading his fingers inside of you. Your gasp, pleasure surging through you as he stretches your cunt out further. “I don’t want to rush this. It’s been far too long since I’ve been able to touch a human. And you are more beautiful than anything I’ve seen before.” He leans down towards your cunt, making you freeze up. 

Those teeth. God, he’s not really going to put his mouth on you with those sharp teeth is he. You try to squirm away but his tentacles are far too strong, keeping you immobile as he presses his lips to your clit. It sends sparks through you, up your spine and down through your legs, arousal pooling heavily in your hips. He looks up at you from under his lashes, sucking softly at your clit. Trembling, shaking pleasure consumes you as he keep fucking his fingers in and out of you, faster and faster as he laves his tongue over your clit. 

“Oh, fuck,” you whimpers. “Heeseung.” His eyes glimmer with satisfaction, having been waiting to hear you break. Your desperate little plea is enough to have him aching but he won’t touch himself. Not now, not when he’s got you right where he wants you. He can’t risk scaring you off like that, he’ll take his time. 

When he pulls back from your cunt, he licks your slick from his lips, still thrusting his fingers in and out of you. When he looks at your face your eyes are glazed with pleasure, lips bitten pink from your own teeth, lips parted as sweet pants and moans drip from your mouth. Heeseung can’t help himself, he wants a taste of your pretty little mouth, so he pushes forward, pressing his lips to yours. 

You moan into his lips, Heeseung’s free hand gripping your hips as he kisses you with reckless abandon. Hardly ever has he had such a perfect little human. Usually he has to take what he wants, or sing until his throat hurts, or offer endless, beautiful sentiment just to get them to spread their legs. But you, never you. You came to him. You walked right into his arms, right between his writhing tentacles, asking for more. It’s never been easier. 

He resists the urge to bite, no matter how much he wants to, instead letting his tongue snake into your mouth. You suck on his long, dextrous tongue, letting it press as deeply into your mouth as he desires. He fucks his fingers into your cunt, curling them up, pressing hard into your front wall until you’re crying out into his lips, hips jerking against his hand. 

You come all over his fingers, Heeseung pulling away from your lips to look. You milky release coats his fingers, and the stone beneath you, dripping towards the ledge. When he pulls his fingers out, slowly, he can feel the ache in his own hips. He wants you, so badly he can barely stand it. When he shifts, a small groan making its way out of his lips, your eyes dart from where they were also looking between your legs to his face. 

“You’re turned on,” you say and Heeseung closes his eyes, as though to try and calm himself down. “I don’t know… uhm… how to…” 

“Don’t worry about me, beautiful. I think even you might scare if you were to see me like that,” Heeseung tells you. He opens his eyes and looks at you, bringing his fingers up to his lips. You watch as he puts them into his mouth, sucking your cum right off of them. He moans, and twisting up against the edge of the ledge. Once clean, he lets them slide out from between his lips. “Fuck, you taste so good.” 

“Can I help you? In… some way?” You offer. “I don’t know how but…” He touches your face gently, tilting your head back gently. 

“You have no idea what you are asking for,” he warns you, voice soft. “The things I want to do to you are beyond your wildest imaginations, beautiful.” He doesn’t let go of you but the tentacles around your legs uncoil. You can feel the places where they once were, where the suckers were pressed against your skin. Slowly, they snake their way up your legs, along the insides, touching the soft, sensitive skin of the insides of your thighs. You gasp and Heeseung smirks, watching you with intent eyes as the tip of one of his tentacles prods at your still leaking and pulsing entrance. “Are you starting to understand the depth of the things I want from you?” He asks, the pointed tip of the other swirling around your clit.

This is where you should leave. You have a feeling this is your out. If you stay, Heeseung might do things you’ve only seen depicted in raunchy hentai, he’s going to do things to you you’ve genuinely never even considered being possible. If you want to leave this cove with any sort of dignity intact, you should back out right now. But even as Heeseung watches the indecision in your eyes and gently removes his tentacles from around your wrists, allowing you to make as hasty an exit as you want, you don’t. 

“Yes,” you agree.

“So?” 

“So, go ahead.” 

He doesn’t even move, still holding you gently by the face as the tentacle at your entrance pushes forward, burying itself inside of you. A gasp is torn from your lungs, your eyes rolling back as you’re filled in a way you have genuinely never experienced before. You grab at his shoulder and wrist, clutching hard enough that it must hurt, digging your nails into his skin as the tentacle inside of you writhes around, suckers dragging against the walls of your pussy like living, flexing ribbing. As it starts to fuck you pleasure rips through you like never before, hot and aching and molten in your veins. 

“That’s it,” Heeseung whispers, but even his voice sounds strangled now. “You’re being so good for me.” The tentacle at your clit attaches a sucker to it, pulsing and writhing, pulling and prodding. Your clit throbs, the stimulation nearly too much. You’re tearing up, your body is quaking, shivering as Heeseung holds you, other tentacles moving to hold your legs and waist, keeping you still so you can be used. So he can keep playing with you, filling you over and over again, toying with your body. 

“Too much,” you gasp out, your cunt clenching and unclenching around the intrusion. Your walls are sensitive from your previous orgasm and the tentacle inside of you has managed to find your g spot or your cervix or something inside of you that’s causing wave after mind flaying wave of pleasure pulse through you with every intense thrust. 

“You said you wanted it,” Heeseung whispers. “Go on then. Take it.”

You shake through the orgasm that’s suddenly ripped from you, the sucker on your clit squeezing and tugging, your cunt spasming through the relentless pounding of the organ inside of you. Your eyes roll back in your head, only a helpless little whimper leaving you as you come. You’re distantly aware of the gush of liquid leaving you, spilling all over the stone and covering the tentacle that is fucking up into you. You think it’s still going on but all you can hear is the rush of your blood in your veins and all you can see is whiteness encroaching on your vision. 

Heeseung breathes out, as though also having reached some kind of relief from fucking you so hard you can’t barely move. Carefully, he lowers you down to the stone, pulling his tentacles back, slipping them beneath the water’s surface. You try to catch your breath as Heeseung leans down over the top of you, pressing soft kisses to your neck and chest. 

“You did so well for me, beautiful,” he coos and you feel inexplicably warm and proud. “Such a good girl for me, taking me first try.” His hands find your waist, soothingly running up and down the sides of it. “You’re so much more than I ever imagined.” 

“Was it good for you?” You whisper, hoping to have brought him some kind of satisfaction. Heeseung smiles down at you. 

“It was amazing,” he assures you.

When you feel like you can finally move, you climb to your feet, retrieving your bag from where you left it nearby. When Heeseung thinks you’re not looking, he reaches down into the water, grasping at something. You can’t see it, but when you turn fully towards him again, he’s leaning against the ledge once more. You get down to your knees in front of him, gently touching his cheek. His dark gray eyes widen in surprise.

“Can I see you again?” You ask and Heeseung smiles softly. 

“You know where to find me, beautiful,” he tells you. You lean forward, kissing him softly. Heeseung kisses you back sweetly, licking once at the seam of your lips. When you pull back, he smiles at you again. “You won’t leave me waiting such a long time again, will you?” He teases. 

“I’ll try not to.” 

As you go to leave, straightened up as best you can be after getting railed by literal tentacles, you head for the wall of the cove. You step out around the edge and then pause, waiting for a second. Your curiosity continues to be piqued and you wait, listening. After a few seconds, you’re rewarded with the sound of soft, gasping moans and you peer back around the edge of the wall. 

Heeseung is still partially submerged in the water, but he’s lying on the edge now, tentacles in the water, bare back on the stone. His head is thrown back against the floor, eyes closed, soft melodious moans spilling from his full lips, his hand down between his tentacles. 

From your angle, you can’t see what he’s doing, but his extremities are writhing, his back arching when he does something that must be particularly pleasurable. It’s frustrating not knowing what exactly it is that Heeseung is doing to pleasure himself but you’re going to find out what it is. He said that it might scare you but, clearly, you’re not easily scared. The next time you come back here, you’re going to figure it out and you’re going to make him feel the insane ecstasy that he’s already given you. 

You don’t come back until a week later, and the weather is less than stellar. It makes you hesitant to go out towards the beach, after what happened last time, though you aren’t not convinced Heeseung wasn’t behind it. Your foot may have slipped but he clearly bashed the boat. Either way, you’re not going to be deterred by the weather, especially since your fixation on Heeseung has started to reach a fever pitch. 

He’s all you can think about. Even at work, even at the marina (which you are finally allowed to go to again), even with your family, he plagues your every thought. Maybe this is the real reason sirens are so dangerous, not because they’ll lure you to your death but because once ensnared, you can’t get out. You’re obsessed with the idea of him. Just last night you touched yourself to the thought of him, his mouth and his hands and those tentacles, how they completely tore you apart. You can’t help yourself any longer, you need to see him. 

The beach is practically deserted due to the weather, the tide higher than normal. You know that it’s dangerous to go into a cove like that during a high tide, but you duck under the sign without giving it a second thought. You’re hopeful you’ll find him again, pulling your jacket closer as you step around the wall of the cave and onto it’s stone floor. 

It’s just the same as you left it, though the water is a little higher. It’s come up past the ledge where it was last time, pooling out in a wide arch. You walk over to the edge of it, your arms wrapped around yourself as you stand at the edge. You sit down right there, uncaring of your shorts getting wet, setting your sandals aside, further away from the water, lest they get swept out. The air is warm even if it might rain, thick and humid, ghosting over you and leaving goosebumps in its wake. You sigh softly to yourself, wondering if it’s even worth it to come out here. What if he doesn’t show up? 

Your worries are put to bed by the tight hold of a tentacle around your ankle. You look down, the same bright red that you’ve come to expect slithering up your ankle, along your shin and to your knee. You stretch your leg out, letting it take further hold of you. You’re dragged, quite suddenly, towards the water, making you yelp. You’re pulled right into Heeseung’s waiting arms, the siren leaning over the top of you as you’re suddenly submerged in water up to your waist, wetting your shorts and your shirt and your jacket. 

“Heeseung,” you gasp. He smirks down at you, gently taking your hands in his. It would be sweet, the way he threads your fingers with his, if he didn’t immediately pin them down by your head, tentacles twisting around your other leg, your waist, writhing up your shirt. 

“Did you miss me, beautiful?” He asks, hovering the top of you, staring down at you with dark eyes. 

“I did,” you agree and he smiles. Tentacles shift over your skin, the suckers tugging at your skin as they creep further and further up your body, until they’re pulling at your shorts and cupping your swimsuit clad breasts. “Heeseung⁠,” you whimper, the onslaught of sensations on your body more than you were expecting right off. 

“I missed you too,” he tells you, leaning down to kiss you. He captures your lips in a soft but intense kiss, his tongue immediately pushing its way past your lips. You whine as he fucks it deeper into your mouth, slithering along your tongue, pressing down on the back of it while his tentacles attempt to pull your clothes off. Your shorts are being shimmied down your hips while your swim top is pushed aside to reveal your breasts under your top. You try to struggle against it but he’s too strong, you’re completely immobilized underneath his hands and tentacles. 

When he pulls back from the kiss, allowing you to breathe again, his eyes run over your body. He can see the way his own tentacles are shifting underneath the fabric of your shirt, feel the rough denim of your shorts as he attempts to remove them from your body. You look up at him with your big, innocent eyes and it drives him crazy. How can such a sweet human have such endless desire? 

“What did you come for, beautiful?” He asks, looking down at you. “My hands,” he squeezes your hands in his, “my mouth,” he licks his lips enticingly, “or would you prefer I split you open on my tentacles again? You seemed to really enjoy that last time,” he comments, making you blush. 

“I have… something else in mind,” you tell him and he lifts a brow. “You have to let me go,” you say, squeezing his fingers between your gently. 

“But I so enjoy you like this,” he comments, looking at the way you’re being held down. Your shorts are nearly far enough down that he could slip right underneath your swimsuit, touching you once more. He can see your nipples through your thin tank top, a pity he didn’t get to play with them last time. To prove his point, he lets his tentacles sweep over your nipples, making you shudder. “Completely at my mercy,” he points out, eyes half lidded as he enjoys the view. 

“And you will,” you assure him. “Just allow me a moment,” you offer. He sighs but lets go of your hands, tentacles retreating from your body. You feel like you can get a full breath in once freed from the bondage of his body, shifting just a little bit away from him. 

“I’m terribly impatient, love,” Heeseung warns you. The new nickname makes you smile. “I wouldn’t keep me waiting.” 

“I won’t.” You strip off your wet jacket, tossing it further up onto the stone flooring. His eyes watch you with intrigue as you start pulling off your clothes, taking your shorts the rest of the way off and also your tank top. You don’t bother fixing your swim top, he’s sure to just push it aside again anyway, so your breasts are fully exposed as you slide back into the water, partially underneath him. 

“What game are you playing?” He asks, watching as you settle down beneath him. 

“Just quelling my curiosity,” you tell him and then slide a hand down his stomach, between his tentacles. It’s a total guess, you have no idea what you are supposed to be feeling for, but you must have pretty good intuition because as soon as you get low enough, your fingers are sliding over a slit in his skin, making him gasp and jerk above you. He grabs your wrist, not pulling you away but stopping you from continuing. When you look up, his eyes have gotten impossible darker, a flush suddenly coating his cheeks. 

“You have no idea what you’re doing,” Heeseung warns you, voice low. “You don’t know what you’re asking for.” 

“I’m curious. Didn’t you say it’s an admirable quality in humans?” You reply and his jaw clenches. “Besides, don’t you want to feel good?” You run your fingers up and down the slit, feeling a slick, slippery fluid coat your fingers. He’s still submerged in the water but it’s thick, vicious enough that you can feel it. Heeseung’s eyes flutter, breath getting heavier. “Let me make you feel good.” 

“You’re not prepared for it,” he tells you. 

“Then prepare me for it.” His eyes narrow. The next moment, he’s pulling your hand away from him, pushing you down onto the stone once more. Your breath leaves you in one heavy gasp and you’re pushed down and wrapped up in tentacles, creeping and slithering and writhing over your body. He takes his hands back, clearly not needing them for what he’s doing to you. Under his intense gaze, your arms are pinned down, legs spread apart, breasts caressed by his sucker laden extremities. Your nipples are covered in suckers, making you cry out as they pull and tug at your sensitive flesh, another one latching onto your clit. Your eyes roll back, pleasure suddenly coursing through you unexpectedly as he takes your goading very seriously. 

“You always seem to be saying things without actually giving them any thought, beautiful,” he says, watching you attempt to struggle against your bonds. He slides a hand back down between his tentacles, fingers running over his sensitive slit, dipping inside. He moans, biting at his lower lip. “You look so pretty like this. Forced to take whatever I give you. Unable to fight me off. It gets me so hot.” He moans again, spreading his slit open, more and more fluid gushing from inside. 

You lift your head in hopes of seeing what he’s doing, but your mind goes blank when a tentacle suddenly thrusts inside of you. You cry out from the sudden stretch, opening you up so abruptly, your pussy aching. It’s brutal, the way it bullies its way inside of you, spreading you open, fucking as deep as it can. You drop your head back against the stone, trying to breath through the intense feelings, overstimulated from all the sensations. Your nipples nearly ache, your clit is throbbing and the suckers are rubbing all over the walls of your cunt. 

The speed at which the tentacle inside of you fucks you is inhuman, almost painful the way that it fucks right into your cervix, the pointed tip feeling like it’s pushing past and into your womb. If you were in your right mind, you would know it’s not possible, but it genuinely feels like it’s trying to rearrange your insides, you feel so full. Every pull on your clit is making your mind spin, amplified by the tight press on your nipples. You think you might be moaning, but you don’t know. All you know for sure is that you’re going to come, you’re going to come, you’re going to come. 

“Then come for me, beautiful,” Heeseung hisses. “Come for me, all over me.” 

Your orgasm spills out of you, a wet gush of slick and cum, maybe even squirt, the way that tentacle was fucking you you’re not sure it isn’t possible. All you know is that you feel out of your mind, stretched to your limits, skin hypersensitive, breasts and clit throbbing. The tentacles on your most sensitive parts slither away, leaving a pattern of sucker shaped bruises on your chest and thigh in their wake. When you catch your breath, you lift your head, trying to see Heeseung.

“You wanna see what you wanted so badly?” He asks and you nod, still unable to see him with the way you’re pinned to the ground. The tentacles around your arms slip away as well, allowing you to sit up a bit. Your mouth falls open when you see what he’s talking about. 

Protruding from the slit between his tentacles is a thick, long, cherry red cock to match the rest of his tentacles. It’s much too big for you to be able to take inside of you, several inches long and throbbing, twitching against the palm of Heeseung’s hand as he strokes it. Translucent fluid drips from the bulbous head, turned purple in his arousal, down the ribbed length of his shaft. A thick vein runs down the underside of it, which he smooths his fingers over, making him groan deeply. When you lift your gaze, Heeseung is staring at you with his tongue between his sharp teeth, the tip curling around one of them. 

“You know what I said, about a human’s sex being so vulnerable. Now you see, I can’t even get to mine without being so aroused I can barely stand it.” He grips the base, throwing his head back as he moans. More fluid flows from the tip, dripping into the water beneath him. When he looks at you again, he swallows, clearly trying to control himself. “You have no idea what you did to me. Just touching my sheath like that, trying to put your fingers inside of me. I wanted you so badly.” He lets go of his cock to lean over the top of you instead, causing you to drop down to your elbows. “The only problem is that there’s no way you can take all of me inside of you. I’d rip you open.” 

“Has a human ever taken you before?” You ask. 

“No one’s ever wanted to,” he admits. “With all these tentacles, what do they want my cock for?” 

“I do,” you tell him and he lifts a brow. “I want to try. I want to make you feel good.” 

“You’re so naive,” Heeseung laughs. “But if you insist.” His tentacles wrap your arms again, pulling you down to the ground. He leans over the top of you, the tentacles still around your legs spreading you as wide as possible, so he can get between them, aligning the thick head of his cock to your cunt. “Try not to scream,” he teases you and then pushes his hips forward. 

It’s hard not to, as he pushes inside of you. Your eyes roll back, your mouth dropping open as you try to keep the noises you want to make inside. At the very least, Heeseung has the presence of mind to go slow, easing himself inside of you inch by agonizing inch. It feels like he’s going to rip you open, and you nearly sob when you realize that was just the head when the ribs of his shaft start entering you too. Your walls clench and unclench, unsure if they want to push him out or pull him in as he keeps going until he’s nestled so far inside of you it feels like you can feel him in your throat. 

“Tsk, tsk, I should’ve known,” Heeseung says, but his own breath is coming out short, trying to restrain himself. You know he wants to ruin you. You look up at him though, realizing he’s looking down at where he’s buried inside of you. When he meets your eyes he smirks. “You can only take half.” 

“Fuck,” you curse, dropping your head back against the stone. If that’s only half of him, what the hell would all of him feel like? You don’t get a lot of time to ponder that though because Heeseung grabs you by the waist, hauling you closer. Your cunt aches in protest, already stuffed to its limit. Then he reels back and fucks you. 

It hurts almost as good as it feels, as Heeseung starts to fuck in and out of you, the head of his cock ramming into your body, over and over again. Without his tentacles holding you down, you might actually be thrashing too much to take it, because he’s ruthless. Or maybe it’s just the weight of him, the size of him, that makes it feel so intense, your already sensitive walls spasming around the natural ridges of his cock. You’re gasping and whining and moaning, unable to control the sounds coming out of you anymore as he takes you apart. 

“You feel so good,” Heeseung moans, gripping you hard enough to hurt. “I can’t believe I finally found a human just crazy enough to let me fuck them. Your pussy feels so fucking good around me, beautiful. Gods above.” Whatever Heeseung is saying is going completely over your head, all you can focus on is how you feel, filled to the brim with his cock, helpless and at his mercy, pinned down by his body. You try to lift your gaze to his face, but you can’t, your eyes are rolling in your head, the relentless pleasure drowning everything else out. 

It might’ve hurt at first, but now it’s just a roiling, boiling sea of arousal, your cunt squelching, his hips slapping wetly against yours, from the fluids you’re both leaking, from the water you’re half submerged in. You can’t even be sure who’s fluids are whose, with the way it’s quite literally gushing out of you with every reckless thrust Heeseung pushes into you, spilling down his hips and spraying all over your thighs. Every hard thrust shakes you to your core, nerves on fire, the aching need to come settling so deep inside of you it’s all you can think about. 

“Hee- Hee- Hee-” you can’t even get his name out in warning. Heeseung keeps fucking you, pushing as deep as he can, almost like he’s trying to make you take all of him, even though you so physically cannot. The constant feeling of unimaginable fullness, the ridges of his cock rubbing against your walls, it’s too much.

You come all over his cock, squirt and cum and slick spilling out around him, running in rivers down the length of him, turning the water around you milky white. Your cunt spasms uncontrollably around him, your body limp and useless as you come. He doesn’t stop though, plowing into you over and over and over again, chasing the feeling of your body, the wet hold of your pussy clenching and unclenching around him. 

“Shit,” he curses suddenly, shoving in as far as he can and staying there. Your eyes roll back, the relentless pressure of him inside of you almost enough to drive you off the edge again. He comes inside of you, but without anywhere for it to go it all comes dripping back down the length of his cock, into the water, rivulets of his milky white cum running down his cock and your thighs. 

For several seconds the both of you stay there, trying to catch your breath. The air is still thick with humidity and an incoming storm, your clothes are discarded a few feet away from you on the stone and slowly, oh so slowly, Heeseung’s tentacles unravel from around your extremities, slipping back beneath the water, leaving bruises in the the shape of his many suckers behind on your skin. 

“Take a deep breath, love,” Heeseung advises, and you do. “Let it out slowly and relax.” You try to do as he says, feeling the way he slowly pulls out of you. It makes you shiver, the feeling of his ridged cock all along your walls, the catch of the head on your entrance. It pops out though and you feel like you can get a full breath in again. You’ve never felt so empty as you do right now. 

Heeseung lies down next to you on the stone, pulling you towards him. When his tentacles wrap around you this time it's softer, gentler, almost lovingly. They caress all the places they held you, over the bruises that mar your skin, wrapping you in their warmth. It’s a little odd, they’re still slick and slippery, but you’ve become used to them. You rest your head on his shoulder, his arms around your waist. 

“You did so good for me,” he whispers, kissing your head. You nearly preen under his praise. “But you know,” he whispers in your ear, “I’m never gonna let you go now.” 

“I wouldn’t want you to,” you tell him and when he pulls back, he looks at you with gentle eyes and that trademark little smirk of his. “How could I ever be satisfied with someone other than you?” 

“You never will,” Heeseung tells you, leaning in to kiss you. You kiss him back, rolling on top of him. His tentacles wrap around your legs and your waist, keeping you steady as you kiss down into his mouth, mindful of those teeth of his.

a/n: you guys asked for monster fucking, so i gave it to you. honestly, i have no idea why this came to me but it literally came to me as i was getting ready for bed and then i was possessed. i really, really enjoyed working on this, it was so weird and fun and strange, god, i love monster aus. they're so fun! i hope you guys enjoy this as much as i do.

taglist: @ducksstolemybread @hoonieshoney

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“hear me out,” and you have been heard 🧏🏾‍♀️🧏🏾‍♀️🧏🏾‍♀️

hear me out. (i love saying this)

camboy jake doing a giveaway of an unknown prize after he hits a follower milestone, and he just possibly rigged the raffle/giveaway so his favorite follower (you) receives the gift. jaeyun just thinks your comments are always so sweet since you don't go too far w your requests or say degrading things to him while he's streaming, so how could he not want to reward you in the only way he thinks he can?

originally, it was JUST going to be a link to a custom video but he decides to do something extra so he mails you something & it ends up being a slutty as hell polaroid nude. the photo is of his mouth down so his mouth is still in frame but its mostly his abs and lower & the picture IS NASSSTY. im talking abs covered in cum, dick still hard & leaking, and finally in the pic you can see his fingers all covered in saliva resting on his tongue & on the back is his personal number in a silver sharpie. written right under his number in his writing is "dial for the rest of your gift ♡"

he waits to see if you call, planning to give you a private video call instead of just a custom video.

UGHH.

OH MY GOD????,??,,,,,, i just creamed STOP FUCKIGN AROUND AND WRITE A FIC DAMMIT ?!/!!/

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what a show

a film to miss.

pairing: female reader x fwb heeseung & jake

warnings: black coded y/n, friends with benefits, public foreplay in theatre, fingering, jerking off, threesome oriented around reader, unsafe sex, using sperm as lube.

wc: 5.2k

i'm.... sorry..the story has some depth to it a little but not enough cuz it kinda jumps into it. anyways thats because i can't write without OVERwriting things since i hate missing context.. but its just... smuuuttttt eventually… hopefully… there aren’t typos

"this movie already blows, damn." you whisper again to both boys.

jake sat to your left, heeseung on your right. "i know, i'm sorry." heeseung responds, looking over his fashion specs to shoot you an apologetic look. jake shifts in his seat a little so he can more comfortably rest his head on your shoulder.

you three had spurged a bit on getting seats in the vip section of the theatre, just to find that you and only three other small groups were watching the movie. each row of seats were set up with leather lounge chairs, in pairs of two.

you and jake shared one, letting heeseung have his own. of course, that was until he got up and forced you to scoot over. the two big bags of popcorn you three bought for the film now occupied his seats as you had to shuffle in close to jake so heeseung could fit in.

two white male staff workers walked back and forth throughout the aisles of the seats to make themselves available to anyone that wanted snacks, but you three weren't too worried about getting anything else considering the constant threat of leaving the movie early out of boredom.

there were 30 rows of seats, and you guys were in the middle row by choice. it was obvious the movie would be absolutely boring considering how easy it was to choose the seats for all three of you side by side, but you took the chance.

so the scenes rolled on. all three of you were wearing hoodies, heeseung in baggy jeans while you and jake sported sweatpants. all three of you had your hoods pulled up, you personally pulling your braids forward to help your hood sit more comfortably. the seats allowed to you to have your legs up, so jake and heeseung had their legs spread out, while you sat with both your legs curled up, almost under your chin.

jake rose his head off your shoulder to lean it on the back of the chair, closing his eyes softly. you immediately notice the change, so you ball your left hand into a fist and lightly hit it on his upper thigh to try and check if he was planning on sleeping the movie away.

"jaeyun." you whisper and he opens his eyes to look at you. "don't fall asleep or i swear to god i'll be pissed." you finish, loosening your fist into a relaxed hand. heeseung changes his seating position, pulling himself up with his ab muscles so he can look over you at him. jake spreads his legs slightly, reaching for your left hand with his, dragging it further up to his groin. he uses both his hands to hold onto yours, cupping your hand within his right, as the left stroked your fingers.

"asking for a handjob in a movie theatre, nice." heeseung teases, you spit out a laugh before looking over at hee, watching him fall back into the seat. he brings his right foot up, planting it on the chair to help him sit more comfortably on the leather seat. "no?!" jake innocently interjects, and he's probably right.

jake, though his sex drive was high, he usually acted out of ignorance to how his actions could translate to others; especially when it came to you. he was more of a giver than a receiver sexually, but heeseung was the exact opposite. so jake usually got accused of the things heeseung would do simply because of projection.

"this man got the sex drive of a cat in heat." you joke back regardless, heeseung coughing out a laugh with a quiet clap of his hands. jake hangs his mouth open at the accusations. “but so do you, so i'm not sure why you're laughing." you accuse, heeseung turning his head to face your direction. "yea, and you fuckin' love that shit." heeseung rebuttals, smirking.

“i mean… you are absolutely right." you answer back, beginning to kneed the palm of your hand into jake's crotch. his hands let go of yours, pulling them out of your way as his hips move up slightly to compliment you. immediately forgetting that he was insisting on not wanting any sexual gratification, he moans lightly, eyes fluttering closed as heeseung cringes.

"keep it down, i'm trying to watch the movie." he jokingly spits, and you breathe out another laugh before elbowing him in his lower stomach lightly. "enjoy what movie." jake loudly whines out, head moving side to side on his chair headrest. you and heeseung immediately shoot your eyes around.

"shh jake, are you trying to be kicked out?" you tease a little louder, as the pace of the movie picks up. heeseung doesn't care to check again to see if anyone's around, so he pulls his left hand up from his side to slip between your thighs. you notice the gesture, so you move your right arm up to get a better view before heeseung uses his free hand to lower your arm from his eye level.

"don't block my sight." he warns lightly, so you immediately drop your arm, overlapping his own laying loosely within your lap. "whatever happens, don't make too much noise, okay?" heeseung adds and you slightly spread the placement of your feet so your legs could spread easier.

"oh~ okay~” heeseung jokingly responds to you rearranging your legs, laughing. he wraps his hand around to the underside of your left thigh, stroking his hand up and down the entirety of your leg. you halt your movements for a while on jake, distracted by the gentle touches, but the whine that leaves jakes lips pulls your attention back. "y/n~" he whines out while shifting his head on the rest to look at you.

"wow, you're sure needy for someone who hates public foreplay." you tease, noticing his features jump a little at the reminder that anyone could move around in the cinema too leave, or come in to see you three. "i-it's fine, just keep going, please." he moans, and you immediately kneed your palm down harder, a low but loud throat moan slipping out into the theatre as the movie has gone silent.

you freeze.

heeseung does too.

jakes head stays still against the headrest, head facing you still, eyes closed.

you hear some shuffling from a group of six rows forward, one of the girls in the group shuffling forward to look back at you three. heeseung immediately stares at the movie instead, and you lock eyes with the chick. you cock your head forward in a questioning motion and she turns around, whispering to the girl on her left.

"jake your gonna get us kicked from this theatre if you don't shut up." heeseung whispers out, still holding your right leg under his left upper arm. "i'm sorry." jake whispers, causing your heart to sink. "awee it's okay baby- and stop being mean to him, damn." your head shifts up a little as it turns from left to right, your sentence splitting between both men.

you fall back into the seats, watching the group of girls ahead of you as you knead a little softer than you had previously, jake's hips lifting slightly with each push you make against his groin. he's hard beyond belief at this point. you could immediately feel when his dick started to fill, a soft three turning into a hard, heavy five inches. "you're probably soaking your underwear right now, aren't you?" you tease jake, and he tries his hardest to contain the loud moan that threatens to leave his lips again.

"i am." he moans, grabbing your left hand with his right to pull the waist of his pants with his free hand, showing you his light grey underwear. a soft wet mark sits right on the fabric where the tip of his dick lies. his dick is pressed against his left hip bone, heavy and prominent. he gently but quickly pulls your hand in, dropping the waistband on your wrist as he brings both hands up and around his groin to mask what's happening.

your infatuation with jake leaves heeseung alone with his hand still laying between your legs, unmoved. he lifts his arm up and out from between your legs to replace it with his right one. this positions him to lean his body and arm over you completely, so he loosely acts as if he’s just cuddling you, placing his head on your right shoulder. his thumb begins to slowly move up and down your crotch in a teasing manner, not enough to count as formal foreplay.

it catches your attention nonetheless. "hee--" "shh. watch the movie." he lightly orders again, so you continue your light stroking up and down jake's print, pretending to watch.

the way heeseung is positioned is painfully obvious to anyone with common sense.

but heeseung has never really cared with his absolute love for public escapades and close calls, so you weren’t surprised.

“heeseung, are you sure its a good idea to be positioned like this?” you lightly question, tilting your head towards him slightly, considering his was is right by yours. the lower right side of your face touches his bang-covered forehead, and he shakes his head lightly to acknowledge the new touch. “i don’t care, if i’m honest.” he honestly replies, his middle and ring finger replacing his thumb.

“well who says i don’t?” you question back, his two fingers lightly pushing your fabric around between your lips to roughly rub your clit.

“then lets leave this fuckin movie and find something better to do.” heeseung replies, pulling his arm away completely, shifting up to stand. “no way dude.” jake interjects as you pull your hand away from under his pants. “i’m as hard as a fucking rock right now, i can’t move?” he protests in a yelling whisper. heeseung steps in front of him before leaning in slightly, considering the lounge chair only leaves so much space. “then tuck it in your waistband and lets fucking go. now.” he lightly orders, standing tall. “you’re not the only one.” he finishes, and you can’t help but glance down at hees crotch before looking up at his face. he catches you, as always, looking past you to see if anyone behind you three is watching.

he notices a couple sitting together two rows back, so he decides against grabbing himself as a teasing response. “let’s go.” he begins again, stepping back, scooting past all the lounge chairs to the stairs on the left side. he turns slightly to watch you and jake begin to stand. you immediately reach in what was his seat to grab the popcorn you guys had bought before waiting for jake to situate himself slightly before standing nervously.

• • •

you three had barely made it back during the uber ride. all three of you were twitching and turning in the car. heeseung and jakes erections slowly depleting the more the older male driver spoke as you were the one to entertain him. you were also the one to hold the popcorn, refusing to look at either boys. of course, after forcing heeseung to sit in the middle.

once you reached your apartment, you rang the door to be let in by the front desk security, heeseung and jake following closely behind. the elevator ride felt like torture, the only thing stopping the two boys from touching you was the cameras you knew existed in one of the corners for safety reasons.

you had texted your roommates that you’d be back soon, and they all agreed in the chat that they’d leave the main entrance/living room lights on so you could walk in easily. all three of you step in, taking a few seconds to messily kick your shoes off before the door fully closes slowly behind you. you make a few steps to set your popcorn down on the counter, heeseung and jake following closely.

the moment your hands are free, heeseungs hands were immediately all over you. his eyes scanned the apartment for your roommates as he stepped in front of you abruptly, holding onto your face with a vice grip. he immediately pushed his soft, light pink lips into yours, his kisses light and feathery in contrast to the grip he had on your face. you felt a second pair of hands reach around from behind, running across the back of your thighs and ass to the front of your pants; presumably jakes.

heeseung sways side to side lightly during the kiss before whining against your lips. he lets go of your face with his left hand to take your right, pushing it against his groin. you immediately open your hand to grope him, outlining his print through his jeans roughly. "fu-ck" he moans out lightly, breath fanning your face before placing his hands gently around your neck. with you distracted, jakes left hand snakes its way past both your sweats and panties to lightly roll his middle finger up and down your clit and vagina.

you gasp out a moan when jake uses your arousal to firmly press and kneed your clit. he moans along with you, stepping in completely to cling himself to you, pressing his erection against your ass. he leans his chin on your left shoulder, feeling you out while watching the hallway to make sure noone pops up from the darkness down the hall. heeseung momentarily takes his right hand away from your neck to ruffle jakes hair a bit, causing him to breathe out a soft laugh. "don't touch me while i'm like, two fingers in her. that's weird." jake jokes, focusing his eyes to watch heeseungs expression change into confusion, stepping back.

he looks to see jakes hand down your pants. the angle of your hand on heeseungs groin proves to be too difficult to maintain when he steps back, so you let your hand fall, giving him perfect view. with the audience, jake rubs his middle finger faster, pushing his ring finger to join the clockwise movements. you choke out a moan between your bitten bottom lip before reaching out to heeseung. he immediately pushes his lips into yours without hesitation. he kisses you again, this time lightly pushing the tip of his tongue into your mouth, meeting yours.

he pulls away, biting his bottom lip briefly. "we gotta get you out these clothes." he whispers to himself, but you and jake hear him perfectly. “not before i reach my roo—“ you begin, cut off my jake shoving his hands up your shirt to fondle each breast in excitement. “jak—“ you start up again, and heeseung pushes his lips against yours before you can finish.

you begin to push heeseung to walk backwards towards your room. jake stumbling behind you, giggling. once heeseungs back hits your door frame, he immediately pulls away from you, ripping your room door open, stepping inside. you and jake rush in, mainly because of jakes pushing.

the door slams shut.

almost immediately, jake steps between you and heeseung, his plush soft lips forcefully kissing yours. his kisses were always more passionate, because he was easily more needy, so you entertained him with the same energy. heeseung stepped away to flick your room light on, stepping to the side. turning back, heeseung brought his right hand up to lightly stroke your under chin, your neck, then yank lighty at your hoodie to motion you to take it off. you apologetically pull your lips away from jake who whines, heeseung putting the back of his left hand to his chest to keep him from chasing your lips as you yank your hoodie up and over your head. you wore a simple calvin klein sports bra, since no one was supposed to see you tonight. but neither boy had expected much from your underwear anyways, considering the comfortable relationship you three had.

heeseung brings his right hand up to pull the elastic up from under your left boob, both breasts dropping out as his distance with the band grows . he pulls his hand back to lightly release the fabric, going to thumb at your left nipple, his index finger joining in to squeeze and roll it lightly as jake watches. heeseung had always been the more experienced one of the two when it came to you, and jake was usually the one to get affected the most whenever he watched you two interact. "fuck." jake whispers to himself, his dick fully stiffening up after such a long pause between the trip back to your place.

"so pretty.." he continues, looking between both breasts as heeseung pulls the bra up your shoulders, over your lifted arms and off your body. "go sit on the bed, baby." you respond to him, using your head to gesture to the left of you, where your double bed was. he immediately shuffled over there, pulling his sweatpants off before sitting back on your pillows. you turned your head towards heeseung, looking down at his jeans, which he immediately begins to unbutton and unzip, dropping them alongside his underwear. he was also hard, his size a tiny bit longer than jakes, but slightly skinnier.

he wasn't nearly as trimmed as jakes was, his dick a darker brown, just like jake. though hard, he didn't show as much blushing as jakes dick did, and he wasn't as wet easily. he hung lower than jake when hard, except his didn’t show any prominent veins.

you lightly wrapped your left hand around his tip, earning a soft hissing noise before using your thumb to tap it, watching small precum strings pull across each time you pulled your thumb away. "that's no fair.." jake whines, noticing heeseung with all your attention. you both look over to see he's not touching himself, just lightly moving his left leg a bit to create some friction.

you step away from heeseung, letting go of him to walk over to jake. you pull and step out of your sweatpants before climbing onto the bed to meet him. you lean back on your knees, your feet holding you up under your bum as you push your braids off your shoulders, jake sitting up to knee walk over to you. he begins to kiss you again, his hands gently cupping your face, when you both feel the bed dip a little at heeseungs added weight. heeseung kneels behind you, his dick pressed against your ass, hands coming up your hips to hook his right hand down the front of your panties.

he immediately finds your clit, rubbing in heavy counter-clockwise circles. your legs start to close slightly at the stimulation, jake breathing heavily into your mouth. he puts his right hand down his brief to pull himself out, stroking softly using the bit of precum that was trapped onto his tip. he moans against your lips as you breathe heavily against his, heeseung continuing his movements. heeseung begins to lightly rut against your backside, his breath fanning your right shoulder as he leaves feathery kisses up, down and around your braided hair.

you begin to slowly close your legs around heeseung's hand to motion to him to stop, so he pulls his hand up and out of your underwear as you start to pull your panties off, backing up to give you space. he hooks his left index finger under your waistband, helping as you sit on your right hip to pull them off and down your ankles. heeseung shyly keeps your underwear hooked to his finger as his hand falls lightly onto the comforter, looking up at you with a slight smirk. you look back at him, reaching up and pulling them away from him with your left hand. you push jake to lay back down in front of you as you start to gather spit in your mouth, sitting up the way you did before.

you collect the spit on your tongue, leaning over jakes groin. he helps you by pushing his dick to stand with his left thumb, watching you slowly dribble down his tip and shaft, groaning. jake jerks himself once lightly while you grab the crotch of your panties and wrap it around his dick stroking him up and down, running your thumb over his tip.

the reaction from him is electric.

"oh my god~" jake moans out, falling back completely with his head hitting your pillow, bangs astray. jakes legs unashamedly spread out for you, knees bent. he withers with each light rub of his tip, biting his thick bottom lip to avoid embarrassing himself around heeseung.

"you always know what to do with him." heeseung compliments, slowly pushing your ass up a bit, so you move your knees back, arching. as you’re eye level with jakes balls, heeseungs right hand curves over your ass, then down and between your lips. he begins rubbing his middle finger up and down your vagina, poking around until he eventually sinks his finger in. to conceal your moans, you kiss the base of jakes dick, who moans in response.

heeseung continues to curl his finger in and out of you slowly, adding his ring finger. feeling hot, jake sits up slightly to grab his hoodie at the waist with both hands before pulling it up and off quickly to not disturb you. he balls it up in his hands quickly before tossing it to his right, falling back comfortably, his pale stomach tinted a light pink. heeseung ends up being the only one clothed, so he momentarily rips his fingers out of you before he grabs his own hoodie, arms crossed over his abdomen, to pull it up and over his head quickly.

you continued to jerk jake off. with every gasp and whimper that poured out of his mouth, his hips moved upward slightly to meet you at the base of his dick. his chest slowly began to turn red with the stimulation, his neck and abs flexed tightly. "i-i'm so close y/n please.." he whines out, eyes closed. "i don't want to come like this, please." he begs again, heeseung laughing.

"god dude, relax." he says, jake refusing to acknowledge him. “you’ll get hard again soon enough, i’m not worried.” you tease, heeseung laughing before getting back to fingering you with the same digits as before. he rubs his now wet fingers up and down your entrance again, causing you to jerk forward before looking back at him. jake whines loudly, both you and heeseungs heads shift over to look at him. his abs are still flexed, eyes squeezed shut. he holds his lower stomach with his left hand, his right hand laid out to the side. heeseung gathers more of your arousal before pulling his fingers out, watching his hand as he spreads the light film coating them, gently.

jakes orgasm is dramatic, as per usual. his loud moan morphs into a cry, both his hands shooting out to hold yours as you quickly jerk him through it. he gasps as his sperm litters his lower abdomen; coming hard. his head shifts to the left, his bangs falling into his closed eyes as his mouth stays open, panting lightly as begin to slowly pump him through it, the end of his release lightly coating the second set of knuckles on your fingers. “y/n” he moans lightly, before beginning to smile from embarrassment.

your brain clicks.

you toss the panty up and away from jakes now limping cock, going to swipe up his release with your thumb, index and middle finger. you rise up to fall back on your ass and lower back, heeseung shuffling back before you can land, your left elbow holding you up, legs spread. heeseung moves over to kneel more in view on your left, jake finally looking up, shifting over to his left in confusion. he looks back between both you and heeseung, who spreads his knees out, watching you between your legs, anticipating.

you begin to drop jake’s sperm down onto your clit, heeseung moaning lightly, his head tilting to the left slightly before gripping himself with his right hand. jakes mouth drops open, staring at the way your fingers begin to lightly wipe the rest of his cum onto your clit and labia.

“oh my god..” jake whispers, watching as you use your middle finger to rub his sperm along your vagina like lube. you begin to push some of it in, both boys groaning loudly. heeseung begins to lightly pump himself with the little bit of arousal he had collected from you earlier on his fingers, catching your attention.

for show, you pull your finger out before patting yourself one time lightly on your clit, a soft wet sound bouncing out through the room. heeseung reacts immediately, knee-walking over. jake moans to himself, his tired dick twitching in response regardless.

“jake?” you ask, shifting your hips forward for heeseung to kneel between them better. “you wanna watch?” you end, his face morphing into a nervous smile before he giggles, falling to his right so he can lay flat on his face into the comforter. he hides his face under his left arm, his naked bum in the air.

you chuckle a bit, heeseung keeping his eyes on your face and tits, switching between the two as he waits for jakes response patiently. you knew the answer, heeseung did too. jake had always loved watching you get fucked or helping you get off whenever heeseung wasn’t.

it was just more fun asking him for a response.

he lifts his head slightly, nodding, the action barely in view. that won’t cut it. “hm?” you question again, heeseung rubbing his tip up and down your entrance to pass the time.

“yes.” he whispers. “how do you want it.” you continue, heeseung’s patience running thin. his dick colour has darkened with the entire encounter since you three stepped in, his tip a deep red. he begins lightly pushing his tip in and out of you, teasing himself. “just like that..” jake answers again, slightly louder. he always loved watching you get fucked when you were on your back, because it always felt more intimate to him, and made touching you easier. with the answer, heeseung keeps his tip inside before placing his hands on both your hips, rubbing his thumbs up and down your skin before pulling you down the bed more to push himself in, raw.

jake reminisces about his cum, still glistening against your clit, biting his bottom lip roughly. heeseung begins slowly thrusting in and out of you, watching your face. you allow your arm to give out, letting you fall flat on the bed, head near the bottom corner of your mattress. your body jerks with each of heeseungs thrusts as he speeds up, his large hands cupping either side of your hips to hold you steady enough to not slide up the bed. jake climbs up the sheets towards you, reaching his left arm snaking under heeseungs to lazily roll your clit under his thumb.

you moan to acknowledge him, jake smiling to himself. he’s slightly hard again, his “cool down” time always being the fastest out of you three. he watches as your boobs bounce everytime heeseungs thighs fully meet yours, along with the rest of your body. heeseung himself looks down between your legs to watch jakes motions, noting the way you lightly jiggle from the waist down with each of his thrusts.

he speeds up slightly again, so you clench around him, breathing heavily. against your invite, heeseung pulls his hips away from yours fully, setting himself free. he begins to use your arousal to jerk himself off, right hand swirling up and down his dick before twisting at the head, panting lightly. you sit up to watch him play with himself, confused. he locks eyes with you before forcing himself to stand on the comforter. jake pulls his hand away from your clit, going to stand as well. heeseung halts his movements momentarily, the two of them towering over you as they both wait for the other to set the stage. jake moves first, holding himself out pointed towards your forehead. you hike yourself up on your knees, sharing your attention. jake pushes his tip against your lips, so you kitty lick it once before swirling your tongue up and around.

"fuck.." jake whispers out gently, looking down at the way you begin to inch your lips down his length, humming lightly to avoid gagging. once he's settled in your mouth, you begin to bop your head back and forth, eyes closed to concentrate on your nose breathing as both boys watch you in awe. "you're so perfect..." heeseung compliments, watching the way you take jake into your mouth so easily. "it's like you're made for this." he continues, this time spitting on his right hand to begin jerking himself off again in pace with you. you reach your right hand between your own legs, relishing in the way jake moans and twitches with each swipe of your tongue on the underside of his cock.

heeseung moans louder than usual, his hand movements speeding up quickly, so you pull off jake's dick to cap your lips around heeseungs tip, sucking. "fuck." heeseung swears one last time before his head tilts back, adam's apple bobbing. he groans loudly as you feel the way his cum spurts out, hot and slimy, into your mouth. you pull off prematurely, some cum falling on your left breast as you spit heeseungs sperm out onto your right hand. after coating your palm and fingers, you wrap your hand around jakes hard, deep coloured tip before clenching roughly, twisting down his length.

jake nearly screams at the way you tightly squeeze around his dick, his left hand pushing your braids back over your shoulder so he can watch you. he bites his lip to avoid moaning but does anyhow, breathing shallowly through his nose. heeseung drops back down to his knees so he can face you comfortably. his left hand slots in between your thighs, middle and ring finger in between your lips, rubbing up to your clit and back down. he feels around for your vagina before curling his fingers in, smirking at the way you lightly moan, your breath fanning jakes tip. you place an open mouthed kiss on the underside of jakes dick, moaning lightly at the way jake lightly shivers.

"too bad about the movie." heeseung randomly blurts, his fingers still thrusting in and out of you, slowly curling upwards with each push in. he earns a light breathless laugh out of you and jake before the younger male vomits out another loud moan, chest heaving. "we could've really saved our money and time." heeseung finishes, watching as you kiss jakes tip once more time before locking eyes with him, smiling.

"oh i could care less about that."

© sjyfave on tumblr 2023

---

it's okay if you're not on a rec list

it's okay if you don't have 1000 followers

it's okay if you haven't written as much as you wanted to this year

it's okay if you doubt yourself

it's okay to want more attention

it's okay if you're too shy to share your work

you are valued. you are here. you are important.

there's at least one person out there who recognizes you and looks forward to what you have to say.

you belong.

time for bed !

asking jjk men to buy you something at the supermarket

• a/n: oh my golly yuutas appearance in the anime im going insane

• made with a female reader in mind, gojo & inumakis show it most.

• includes gojo, geto, megumi, yuuta, inumaki, nanami

made by @belovedstarrs do not copy or use in any way without permission

ykw I love x black!reader’s? cause i’m sick and tired of y’all still doin the same shit. MFS WILL SPECIFICALLY PUT (no description of reader) IN THEIR FICS AND SOMEHOW ITS STILL TAILORED TO NON-BLACK PEOPLE.

make shit make sense.

---

★ his love never felt right

– like and reblog if you save :)

+ not my pictures/ib for moodboard on the next post <3

* cr to the owners

I have something inappropriate to say 🤭

I Don't Play Nice

pairing: riri ✘ black!fem!reader

summary: don't fuck fans. this was your rule. unfortunately though, the development of this rule came only after you'd done just that. and now, you cannot seem to outrun your mistake.

word count: longg <3

contains: singer!reader, obsessed!fan!riri, mean!reader, semi mean!riri, possessive!riri, jealous!riri, ooc riri, tbh riri herself is a warning, toxic dynamics, some darkish themes?, mentions of stalking, smut (18+), dom!reader, sub!riri, bratty!riri, riri is mouthy & very unhinged, oral, choking, knife play (riri loves her knife), light nipple play, mentions of blood, car sex, public sex?, strap!reader, fingering (riri receiving), multiple orgasms, overstimulation, dirty talk, spanking, crying, biting, pain!kink, masturbation, strap sucking (barely), use of drugs (pills), rough sex

tags: @verachii @venusdraco @quintessencewrites @cjariot @widowmakker @blackgcomica @n7cje @dejaonline @shinsousliya @generallysapphic @mbakuetshurisprincess @pinkwright @saintwrld @axailslink @mocha-aya @uhwhatsay @6-noir @cuddl3s4shur1 @chidinma @shuriszn @lppriceisright @sweetalittleselfish-honey @abenomeiiii @marsolgy @prettymrswright @shurisjournal @marsolgy @shurismainbxtch @shurisbbymama @shuriri4life @cafehyunji @yunhofingers @yamsthoughts @iseebeautyinwords @ihearttish @vampzxi @sapphicvqmpires

divider by: @firefly-graphics

note: uhhhh, just stay with me, walk with me!!! see it the way i’m seeing it first!!! the car scene/smut is heavily inspired by ohmami by chase atlantic & maggie lindemann, i've had that song on repeat for weeks just sitting in my ideas. i would suggest listening to it to understand some of the references lol. other songs that inspired this fic: misunderstood - kodie shane, don't fight it - kodie shane, f&mu - kehlani, triggered - chase atlantic, off my head - kodie shane and then ohmami last. also this is dedicated to that anon who was screaming in my askbox for sub!riri for like a month, i saw you fren. i had too much fun writing this even though it killed my brain, i didn't even think i was gon post it fr. but anywhoo, hope y'all enjoy! mwah, mwah!!

Bright neon lights illuminated the stage, your crimson-hued silhouette resembling that of a deity from where you stood, bathing in the crowd’s continuous chant of your name. There were distinguishable cracks in the voices rushing you, throats more than likely sore from the ear-piercing screams bellowing out of them, yet still, they endured, glazed eyes stalking you in sheer adoration. Your audience clung to your every lyric, your every move down to the bounce of your sweaty curls as you pranced around the stage.

You were in your element, entrancing their minds with a power you had yet to grow used to.

In your chest, your heart gained life, its thump a deafening pound resounding in your ears; if the beating were any louder, the microphone clasped in your fist would surely pick it up. But it was yours to hear, just like the sensation of your stomach in your throat was yours to feel — the absence of your mind yours to know.

Calling your love for performing an addiction would be an understatement. You were your most authentic self on stage, every surge of adrenaline dosing the high you were jonesing for. Your confidence blossomed, not as a mirage, but as the most corporeal entity your body could conjure up, differing greatly from your branded media persona of an arrogant, entitled, asshole.

These were titles intended to condemn following the very messy breakup with your now ex-girlfriend, renowned actress Syla Slate. Gorgeous, talented, beloved by all of America; she was their sweetheart, so naturally, she won the public’s favor in the split. But your resilience had been a thing miscounted, and woefully so; you wore your scarlet letters with honor, refusing to clear up rumors surrounding your infidelity.

If there were words to be said, feelings to unpack, you would express them on the stage before the thousands of people holding your word as bond, which happened to be the exact thing you did now.

“London!” You commanded the audience with outstretched arms, your very presence eliciting a thunderous uproar. “I ain't think y'all could get any louder.”

The drove of onlookers read your disbelief as a challenge, shouts climbing the arena walls as the sharp octave punctured your eardrums.

You popped out your in-ears, unable to halt the slow smile stretching across your features. You were proud, proud that they risked the health of their voices just to hear yours. “Well alright, I guess y’all could get louder.”

They chuckled as a collective, making you follow suit, “I got one more song for you lot. That's what y’all be saying over here, right? You lot? Shidd, my southern ass wouldn't know,” They laughed again at your terrible rendition of a British accent. “Anyway, like I was saying, I got one more song, y’all cool with that?”

Just as you expected, shriek after shriek bled into one another, melding to create a boisterous sound that expanded around the O2 Arena, and you let your smile broaden as you secured your microphone back into its stand. “Ooh, y’all sound excited!”

The slowed tempo of your closing track began its waft, filling the speakers, the ears of your admirers, and your system all at once. They recognized the beat within seconds, the bass now competing with their cries.

A little bit of that arrogance you chose not to refute came peeking through as you adjusted your mic stand, “Oh y'all know this one, huh?” And they yelled again, satisfying you.

You shut your eyes, expiring a shaky breath into the grille of the mic in preparation, allowing the music to seize hold of you. Your digits trembled around the mouthpiece, and your rings scraped the surface.

Complicated, I shouldn't ever have to feel this way.

Instinctively, the lyrics vacated your mouth, and instinctively, your sockets began to well. You fought the tears, keeping your lids tight in protest of the tumble they threatened.

But, every time I try to up and walk away,

You come around and start to love me, love me better.

Your emotions and your wet eyes were both the epitome of irony. How many shows had you closed with this very song? Why were the waterworks threatening to spill now?

Complicated, I shouldn't ever have to feel this way

Perhaps they were due to the truth stewing inside you. Tonight wasn't just the last show of your tour, it would be your last live performance for a while. You would be leaving your heart on this stage tonight. A difficult decision made, but a necessary one nonetheless. Perhaps this was your body attempting to accept this fact.

Every time I try to up and walk away,

You make a promise that you'll love me, love me better

Love me, love me better

After a moment, your eyes fluttered open and the tears swelling your orbs rained down, fogging your vision. You loosened your strangle on the mic, only now realizing how tight you held to it. As you gazed at the sea of bodies, you noted their red eyes and damp cheeks. They were screaming your song back at you, your lyrics dragging through the air.

It wasn't uncommon to witness your fans crying at your shows; your music overwhelmed them; their connection to you overwhelmed them, and the vulnerability birthed from this emotional exchange overwhelmed you.

I think I'd rather just be misunderstood,

Found out your love ain't no good.

You took in the masses, scanning their dazed smiles as you continued to sing, and that's when you saw her.

Through the mist in your eyes, she emerged out of nothingness. Clad in lace, sporting that devilish smirk that curdled your blood, wearing those dark irises brewed to the brim with mischief. You could always pick her out in any crowd, which looking back, had been the commencement of your own undoing.

Had me at hello, got me with a kiss, left me in abyss.

She swayed to the music, mouthing the words with those dangerous fucking lips. Lips that could ruin your life with a single utterance, lips that did ruin your life, your relationship.

When you finally let your eyes meet, she bared her white teeth, taunting you in that way she often did. You were seething and she knew it, her swift little wink a testament to her knowledge.

You should turn away, rip your gaze from hers, focus on the tear-stained faces in the audience. You should ignore the abrupt shift in your heart’s thump, how it rattled in rage now at an uncomfortable rate. You shouldn't allow her to get to you just by simply existing.

Don’t want my heart cold, so I took it off of my neck and my wrist.

But, in an arena sculpted to house twenty thousand, a lone Riri Williams faded your performance high just by being.

God she was maddening, and inescapable it seemed, no matter the continent you ventured to. To the rest of the world, it'd look like you were serenading her in a bubble where just the two of you existed, but you both knew better. Your anger was palpable to her alone, something she counted on; you’d played this game of hers long enough to hone certain skills, like how to bury your building fury. Your muscles tensed, your knees locked in place as you returned to choking the mic yet again, sizzling under your elevating temperature.

You sang through your irritation though, spitting your venomous lyrics directly in her face as she watched, amused. She wouldn't ruin this parting performance for you.

Found out it was mostly lust but not love.

You kept your eyes on her for the duration of the song, earning jealous stares from the other girls rallying around her, their own hopes of soliciting your gaze made obvious. They were shoving, and yelling, yanking the barricade aggressively, yet still, all your focus lay on Riri. It's what she hoped for, to ensure chaos, to make it obvious she did not need to vie for your attention, she just… simply had it.

You were strengthening her pride, the last thing you sought to do, but looking away from her proved to be impossible.

Complicated, I shouldn't ever have to feel this way.

But, every time I try to up and walk away,

You come around and start to love me, love me better,

Love me, love me better…

Confetti raining from the heavens emulated her skin's shine, golden and distracting, the showers causing you to rip your stare away from her briefly. When the dust settled, she’d vanished, disappearing like she'd never existed, and you couldn't help but chuckle to yourself with a head shake.

“London, thank you, I love you. I’m gonna miss you!”

With that, the lights dimmed, giving you time to evacuate the stage swiftly and stealthily. Off you went, mind still muddled with the smugness she wore on her features as she gawked at you with feral eyes.

Riri being in town meant trouble, and you wanted no fucking part in whatever she had planned.

•••

After leaving the venue your entire body felt numb and fatigued, so you instructed your driver to take you straight back to your hotel. Typically, your routine concluding a performance would involve saying hello to fans who stayed behind after the show, you'd done it countless times, but not tonight. With Riri on the loose, you couldn't chance running into her anywhere, not in your current state of exhaustion. If she was to meet you this way, you were ashamed to admit that it would take zero effort on her part to coax you into doing whatever she wished.

You weren't too tired to be furious though, allowing the emotion to take precedence over your shame; you intended to use said fury to venture as far away from Riri Williams' deranged ass as you could manage.

The length of your silent car ride was spent with your head propped on the cool window, pondering her being in London. You didn't have to question her why; Riri fought valiantly to be wherever you were, but her how, that remained somewhat of a mystery.

How was it plausible for her to be in Europe right now? Her finals should be consuming the majority of her time, clashing with the schedule for the last leg of your tour. You knew this because you planned this.

For the first fifteen stops, there were no tour buses broken into, no dressing room locks tampered with, your shows remained uninterrupted, and you hadn't had to suffer through your usual internal battle when facing off with your biggest weakness. All was fine until tonight, your final concert.

How convenient, you thought, though you supposed her powers should in no way surprise you anymore. You knew the things Riri was capable of, experienced the fate of her actions.

Which was why you decided a quiet night in your hotel would be your chosen way of decompressing. When you pulled up to where you were staying, you shot your manager a text informing her you would not be attending the after-party thrown in your honor. Parties meant paparazzi and their intrusive questions about your relationship, or rather, the lack thereof. But most annoyingly, parties meant Riri, and her covert ways of always weaseling past security at events she presumed you to be at.

And you would pass on dealing with either scenario tonight.

The elevator chimed, doors sliding open on your floor and you stepped out, trotting swiftly toward your suite with a hot shower in mind, one that would rinse away your stressors.

Upon unlocking the door though, there was an immediate sense of something being off, the instinct an acquired habit after your colossal mistake of intertwining your life with Riri's. Every day since you'd been made to look over your shoulder. You stalked deeper into your room, eyes trailing to your rumpled white comforter pulled back as though someone had lain in your sheets.

Before you left that morning, you'd made your bed, another acquired habit, this one drilled into you by your grandmother growing up, and one you practiced diligently when sleeping in threads that weren't your own.

So naturally, with the sight laid out before you, your mind ran straight to the only person you knew could be responsible. The pillow on the right side of the bed was dented, and one of your silk button-ups from a previous concert sat in a pool on the carpet. You bent over to pick it up, pulling it to your nose for a deep inhale to find that you were indeed correct; the intoxicating aroma of Riri's perfume misted the fabric, forcing an unintentional smirk to crack across your lips. You battled against its appearance and lost, as usual.

She was here, in your room, in your bed, wearing your clothes. And recently too, her floral scent still lingering on your linens serving as proof. Your eyes rolled on command, but you decided to ignore the knowledge you'd just gained, mind still set on that well-earned shower. You figured you could still get to it, if Riri had still been around, her presence would've been made known the moment you stepped through the threshold.

Her absence indicated one thing though; she wanted you to come find her, but you wouldn't play into her hand. You were far too tired, and far too over her games.

You began a leisure strip, stepping out of your leather pants and dressing down to your undergarments before making your way to the bathroom. You stopped short when your toes met the tiled floor, gawking at the scene awaiting your attention.

Scarlet petals floated atop long departed waters, blanketing the bath that had now run cold. They were scattered across the floor as well, and the lasting whiff of outed lavender candles filled the air. A discarded bra hung off the side of the tub, matching panties too, and you sighed, stepping on the torn roses as you walked further into the bathroom. She sure knew how to make herself at home.

When you stood before the sink, your eyes dropped instantly to the counter, glued to the promiscuous polaroids littered across it.

Every last one of Riri, every last one taken in your bed. Your shirt draped her body in some, the golden shade making her skin pop beneath the material, mimicking the confetti from earlier. But she was fully naked in most, bare breasts and nipple jewelry exposed with her perfectly manicured fingers playing in her pretty cunt. You picked them up one by one, examining the images further.

The angles were impressive, you couldn't lie, and you appreciated her effort. Like her position in the picture your thumb grazed now; Riri was bent over, ass high in the air, her dripping folds glistening in the perfect shot.

The more time spent gaping at the photos, the stickier your underwear became, clinging to your own saturated cunt. Riri's effect on you wasn't some unknown thing, you were aware of it, she was damn sure aware of it, and these polaroids displayed below you were her version of a reminder, but you chose to stare anyway, reveling in the building throb at your center.

In the final one, her locs cloaked her shoulders, slightly shielding her nipples from your view. But your focus did not lie there, instead, the hefty-looking purple toy rammed into her tight hole stole your attention. It stretched her wide, the pleasure causing her head to sling backward, and those pretty lips to part, forming the most pitiful little 'o' you'd ever seen.

It was this shot that compelled your hand's betrayal, your shower partially forgotten as you slipped your digits beneath the waistband of your panties. One stroke of your swelling clit had your throat craning, imitating Riri's in the photo, a rugged moan slipping free as you splashed around in your wetness, eyes fluttering in response to the sensation.

Before you could really delve into pleasuring yourself though, you glanced at the mirror, reading the words written on it, words you'd somehow missed upon entry.

You rolled your eyes and freed your damp hands from your pussy, arousal on a mission to flee your body. It was replaced instead, by your previous rush of agitation as you reread her cheeky message.

“Did you miss me?” Scribbled across the glass in ruby-red lipstick, the question enclosed in her literal kisses.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

•••

In an interesting twist of events, you'd found yourself in the hotel bar nursing a rum and coke with your thumb looming over a poorly typed text message, those photos still weighing heavy on your head.

Under steaming streams meant to wash her likeness away, your pussy had a vastly different idea in mind, wrangling your fingers in on the plan against your will as you fucked yourself to the thought of her. You came harder than you had in weeks, though the orgasm did nothing to relax your spinning mind.

That's what the alcohol was for, or, what it was supposed to be for anyway.

You’d wandered downstairs in disgrace, desperately needing to drink your actions away. But rather than the escape you chased after, you were met with only more shame at the bottom of your glass. It was your single drink that prompted the idea of texting Syla. A risky move, and a cliché at that, texting your ex the second a drop of liquor kissed your lips. But, you’d done worse things, quite literally moments before drafting the unsent message you still stared at.

You supposed it was the guilt of your shower excursions truly driving your choice. She deserved an explanation for everything, a proper one, and providing that hadn't been an accessible opportunity over the past few months. She was busy on set, and you were on tour, battling the everlasting presence of the demon at fault for your parting.

Riri Williams.

You'd met her a year and a half ago, when your career was on the climb, and the line of girls willing to do whatever you wanted on the promise of a good fuck and a shot at being your next video vixen was unending. You never delivered on the latter part of that promise, but after experiencing the former, they hadn't the capability to mind much.

It was a routine you developed, sleeping with girls after every show, slutting them out, then sending them on their merry ways immediately after. So when the girl with full lips and sinful eyes caught your attention in a Chicago crowd, you knew immediately she was to be your next conquest.

She was alluring, unsettlingly so as she bopped to your singing with a smirk hanging off her blood-red lips. Danger lurked beneath that smirk, lying wait, and you took notice. It should've been your first sign to steer clear of the menacing beauty, but, you were stubborn by nature, and evidently your own worst enemy. So you stooped on the stage, extended your hand to meet hers, laced your fingers together, and sent the audience into a frenzy when you dedicated your celebratory ode to the soul foretold to doom your life.

Riri was the first of your plethora of playthings able to keep up with your stamina. She was fucking feral, and insatiable, hell-bent on riding your strap off of its harness. You weren't ashamed at the time to admit she was the best you’d ever had, and that was only after one night together.

You hadn't even questioned her appearances at multiple gigs and events afterward; you were way too gone off the sex to notice the sprouting problem. Much like performing, you were developing an addiction to her, and the heat between her thighs. Submerging your tongue deep within her wet walls provided the same jolt of adrenaline you received from being on stage, if not more. Bending her over to demolish her from the back got you higher than the chants from thousands of fans ever would.

When you finally did come up for air long enough to acknowledge your predicament, it had been far too late. You began to pull away, wanting to wean yourself off of the drug that was Riri. But she wasn't going for that.

Where you tried dousing your addiction into a dwindling flame, Riri's obsession flourished like a forest fire.

Denying her access to yourself was possibly the worst decision you could have ever made. It didn't stop her from finding your studio, damaging your car engine and conveniently being nearby to help fix it, she even went as far as getting jobs at the venues you played just so she could see you, only to quit directly after your set.

Her ways of maneuvering were mind-boggling, frustrating you to your very core because no matter the effort you poured into it, leaving Riri alone was a task you found to be formidable. She'd show up, and you'd give in. Every. Single. Time.

All of that came to a crashing halt when she obtained your home address, deciding to break in as some grand romantic gesture to “win you back.” You didn't read it that way, obviously, and you branded her a lunatic who had no part in your life. You fucked her like she was nothing and sent her packing, threatening a restraining order if she didn't leave you alone from then on.

Dating Syla forced you to make good on that threat. Your relationship was fairly new at the time, but you liked her enough to want to keep Riri miles and miles away from her. You were at a place of contentment in your career, the need to collect a harem of women washed from your system after the nightmare of your last encounter, and peace seemed like an obtainable thing, or at least some semblance of it, with Riri gone for good.

It's what she allowed you to believe anyway, until she'd apparently had enough of watching you be happy with a woman who wasn't her.

You'd received a text composed of the same words signed across the mirror upstairs.

Did you miss me?

And it wasn't much longer before Syla was on the line, screaming obscenities at you through the phone.

“Lying bitch.”

“Cheating ass hoe.”

“Fucking slut.”

“We're Done.”

She hung up without letting you get a word of defense in, leaving you more so angry than heartbroken. Because it was undeniable that the cause of Syla's unrest and the text on your screen somehow coincided. A truth confirmed when your phone started dinging off the hook.

Riri liked to take flicks.

“To commemorate the moment.” She'd say, and it had already been discovered that telling her no wasn't a thing you could do, so you always let her pull the camera out, far too turned on by the idea of your own personal collection of home movies with Riri in your phone.

In hindsight, you should've guessed they'd come back to bite you in the ass eventually, despite Riri's accomplished skill to manipulate. How she'd managed to convince you the tapes existed in your phone alone was embarrassingly beyond you.

Because there they all were, coming through one by one as you sat on the edge of your bed, dumbfounded.

Syla had forwarded every piece of incriminating evidence that backed up her accusations to you. There were dozens of photos, dozens of videos, all of you and Riri over the year she spent in and out of your sheets. None of them recent, but that ceased to matter. Your girlfriend had seen images of your strap down Riri's throat, watched videos of her back arching impressively for you. And your words; her ears were exposed to the vulgar phrases you hissed as you fucked Riri senseless, phrases you'd never once mouthed to her in the bedroom.

Which was why your conscience scolded you so, because the hurt dampening her words that day was unmistakable for anything else. Yet, you ignored that fact in the shower, huffing Riri's name as you permitted a climax brought on by her image to rattle your bones.

You sighed, finally hitting send on the message just as the bartender approached you, “Oof, you look like you could use another one of those. My shift ends soon, but I could make you another if you'd like.”

Her name tag read Esperanza. Pretty, you thought, a pretty name for a pretty girl. Almost pretty enough to tempt a yes out of you, “Could you ask me again, preferably in an accent that isn't as attractive as yours so I can say no? Because I really, really wanna say no.”

She laughed when you groaned in frustration, rewarding you with a blinding smile that unexpectedly heated your cheeks, “I mean I could, my Swedish accent is pretty terrible, that might work. But I won't, seeing as it's in the job description to seduce guests into buying more alcohol with my voice.”

“Is it?” You questioned with a small smirk.

“Yeah. Especially the pretty American ones like yourself.”

You opened your mouth, fully prepared to retort with something equally as flirtatious, but then your phone buzzed in your palm, capturing your attention as your eyes fell to the device in hopes of seeing Syla's name lighting the screen, only to be met with disappointment.

You wanna fuck that bitch or something?

The number unknown, but the sender was far from.

“Would you excuse me?” You spoke finally and Esperanza nodded, returning to her business of cleaning the counter down.

You stood up from the stool with darting eyes, scanning the bar for any signs of her presence but to no avail. When your phone rang, you answered it without a second thought.

“Where are you?”

Soon, Riri’s permanently teasing voice chimed in your ears, “Hi baby, you miss me?”

She giggled, and you imagined her somewhere twirling her hair around her finger, smiling innocently to herself.

You huffed into the mic, already beyond irritated with her antics, “Riri, where are you?”

“Ugh, baby, why you always so hostile?”

“I told you to stop fucking calling me that.”

“Don't be mean to me. I'm sensitive, baby.” You could hear the frown in her voice, the way her tone took a dive indicating she'd been truly hurt by your words, which only annoyed you more.

“No, you're fucking crazy.” She paused, just like you'd anticipated, and you listened for her intake of breath, smirking when the faint sound of her gasp blessed you. You knew her eye twitched like it always did, you just wished you had the pleasure of witnessing it for yourself.

“I don't like that word.” Her declaration blew through the speaker cold as ice.

You dragged your hand over your face, losing the patience you barely had to begin with. “Riri, what do you want?”

“Did you see my pictures, baby?” Just like that, she did away with the chill lacing her voice, returning it to its usual chipper pitch. “Did you like them? I figured you'd need something to… relax you after your big performance. You did so well by the way, I’m proud of you.”

The thrill that shot through you from her praise would have to go ignored, because you weren't trying to deal with any of your conflicting emotions for the psychotic girl on the other end of the call. “What do you want from me?”

“You and Esperanza looked cozy flirting at the bar. Can't say I wasn't jealous, you never talk to me like that. But if you like her, I could help get y’all together, give you a helping hand and shit. Now that you single.” She giggled slightly after finishing her last sentence.

You turned, eyeing the bar once again. It was mostly empty, save for the three girls in a corner booth, the security guard posted at the door, and yourself. Esperanza had left it seemed, clocking out like she promised, leaving you alone with the ghost of Riri on your line.

You rolled your eyes, remembering how you still suffered the ramifications from the last time she felt inclined to offer a helping hand, “Your crazy ass blew up my fucking relationship and you think I want your help?”

She remained silent for a lengthy amount of time, almost tricking you into believing the line went dead. It wasn't until you were lowering the phone from your ear that she cleared her throat, and you braced yourself for impact. “She could never satisfy you and you fucking know it. You ain't even like her for real, you just wanted a new bitch laid up under you after I stopped giving you access to this pussy baby.”

If the word delusional existed as a person, her name would be Riri Williams.

“You're fucking insane do you know that? Like something is genuinely wrong with you if you think–”

Riri cut you off, “Let's not forget I wasn't alone in our little movies baby. You can't blame your fuck ass relationship failing all on me, because if I remember correctly, you was the one holding the camera while you was blowing my shit, wasn't you?”

Your throat dried, your vision reddened, and your phone shook inside your fist. You couldn't speak because there were no words to be said. “Ri–”

“You know what? I change my mind, I won't help you with Esperanza after all. I like having you to myself anyway. You still want me, and with ole girl out the picture, we can go back to how we used to be.”

“Tell me where the fuck you are Riri.” There was a thud on her end, one that you also heard inside the bar. She was definitely somewhere close.

She tsked, “Nuh-uh baby, you gotta come find me. I got a surprise for you.”

And she hung up the phone, the beep forcing an exasperated sigh from your lips as you stood hopeless in the middle of the bar.

•••

For as long as you’d known Riri, she'd always been obsessed with the never-ending game of hide and seek she trapped you in, forcing the role of being it on you every time. She wanted you scouring the hotel for her while she waited, sitting pretty in whatever cranny she'd made herself comfortable in. She wanted you to do what you always did when you inevitably smoked her out of hiding: punish her for her bad behavior.

Fuck what she wanted.

You wouldn't give in, not this time, and what better way to ensure this case than leaving the hotel entirely? It was late, the night breeze dry as the valet pulled your brand new Ferrari GTC4Lusso around the front, the street lights reflecting off its bold cherry tint. A destination was the furthest thing from your mind when you climbed inside the car, but truthfully, you didn't require one. Driving was merely a ploy to put some distance between you and Riri.

The car’s rumble when you pulled off wasn't one loud enough to drown out your screaming thoughts, much to your dismay. You’d hoped, at the very least, that the revving engine, and the openness of the endless motorway you were now zipping down recklessly, would be enough to dampen your anger. But alas, vexation was an ever-present emotion whenever you found yourself in proximity to her, or rather, when she forced proximity between the pair of you, and it didn't emerge for the reasons you wished it did.

Your adrenaline was rocketing, heart rate spiking in tandem with the numbers on the dash as your toes pushed into the pedal, but despite all this, your sour mood remained. Because you could not discredit Riri's infuriating claim; you wanted her still. You'd endured months without her, abiding by the useless lies that failed to convince you otherwise. That lust for her taste lingered, that lust for her feel, all of it.

Lust that Syla could never satiate, and you often got the sense she wasn't heedless to that truth.

“Fuck!” You cursed aloud, eyes flickering to your dinging phone screen colored in her text messages.

You almost reached for the device resting in the mount, crippling guilt once again driving your decision-making. But you reminded yourself you were behind the wheel, just as an identifiable sensation against your bobbing larynx sent a chilling shiver down your spine, and molded you still in your seat. Briefly, cautiously, you allowed your eyes to leave the road, causing the car to swerve unintentionally into another lane when your gaze became acquainted with the object pinning you down. Beautiful, black, and blinding; the razor-edged blade tacked to your flesh was accompanied by the sweetest pain, and a deeply sultry voice. “We don't text and drive, baby. Leave the bitch on delivered.”

When she spoke, it irritatingly settled your breathing, but not enough to assist you in regaining control of the steering wheel clutched in your fists. There were other cars on the road honking at your continued shifting, but what could you really do when there was an insane girl holding a knife to your throat as you drove? “Riri...”

“I told you to come find me and you didn't.” She spat harshly. Just your fucking luck, she was upset.

“Riri, Ima crash this fucking car if you don't move that shit from my throat.”

She ignored you of course, opting to press the knife in harder. If it were her goal, she could break through skin, the choking pressure indicative of the power she wielded, and in any other circumstance you'd probably be enjoying her lethal way of incapacitating you. “Why didn't you come find me? I was waiting for you.”

“I'm not finna play this game with your psychotic ass tonight Riri. I said fucking move that shit.”

Once again, your cry fell on deaf ears. She kept her hand looped around the driver's seat, knife firm in her fingers as she tightened her grip on the decorative, golden handle.

You listened to her airy exhale, flinched beneath its warmth when it plowed into your expecting cheek, and it was then that you allowed your glare to capture hers in the rearview mirror. Her lips, pouty and red-stained, twitched at the corners, morphing into a foreboding smirk that traveled straight up to her smoky eyes. Eyes that were deep, eyes that were dark, and exceedingly dangerous; like a void you were destined to forever fall victim to.

Riri launched her body forward, nibbling on your bare earlobe. “You're being mean again baby. Real mean for somebody with a knife pressed to they throat right now.”

The sting from the blade began to heighten, building into a burn so glorious, it shot through your limbs, and you found yourself inadvertently tilting your head backward to relish in the hurt.

“I could slit your fucking throat right now and you wouldn't even be quick enough to stop me.”

Words of your own were difficult to come by, you were entirely consumed with combatting the violent throb increasing in your pants, all amidst your efforts to keep you both alive in the drifting Ferrari, but it seemed your soul was the only one inside the car yearning to live another day. “Ri–”

“Just kidding!” The dagger levitated, undoing its imprint in your flesh, and you coughed, one hand instantly flying up to your bruised throat while the other remained on the wheel, regaining full control of the vehicle.

She planted a long, sloppy kiss on your cheek before climbing over into the passenger seat, giggling all the while.

“Jesus fucking Christ Riri, what the actual fuck?!” You spared her a glance, of course she was grinning.

“Were you scared for your life, baby?” She giggled again, biting her lip as she tried reaching for your phone, but you smacked her hand away before she could get to it. “Rude!”

You sighed, “How the hell did you get in here, Riri?”

“Mmm, semantics.” She huffed, seemingly bored.

You relaxed, eyes fixed back on the road now that you were somewhat confident Riri wouldn't be slicing you open. Your muscles loosened and you fell into a leisure position, tossing an irritated scowl her way. “What are you doing in London? You should be at school. Don't you have finals and shit?”

“Aww, look at you all concerned about my studies. You're so cute, baby.” You tried your hardest not to cringe at the pet name and the heat it churned inside your abdomen. “But, obviously I had to see you. You all single now, your tour just ended, and you announced that hiatus, I didn't know when I'd get the chance again. Aren't you happy I'm here?”

“Not at all.”

She frowned, “That's not funny.”

“I wasn't tryna be fucking funny, you shouldn't be here.”

You hadn't needed to see her face to know a smirk played in her features. “You didn't think that lil restraining order was gon stretch all the way across the pond did you? They don't got jurisdiction over me out here baby. I can be as close to you as I want.”

You groaned inwardly, unaware of who you were truly annoyed with; Riri and her actions, or yourself for being so damn turned on listening to her insane logic. She was correct, because you knew that her stunt with Syla wasn't a one-off, and you'd eventually be seeing her again.

Riri was immensely smart, so it made sense that she waited until you were no longer on American soil to corner you, and making you think you'd finally escaped her by being in Europe had to certainly be part of her plan as well. Fuck, why was her conniving nature so damn sexy?

“How did you get in my car?” You asked again.

“I'm not that big, and you should know by now that I'm very…” Riri paused, deliberating on the word she wished to use. “Efficient, when it comes to getting into places I probably shouldn't be in.”

“Yeah, cause you're crazy.”

You could see Riri's body turning towards you in your peripheral, she bent her knees in the seat, eyes locked on your form as she skillfully maneuvered her knife in between her digits. “You like your tongue, baby?”

“What?”

She sneered, “Your tongue. Do you like it?”

“The fuck are–”

“Cause I like your tongue. When it's inside me, when it's rolling over my clit. Yeah, I actually kinda love your tongue, and I really, really want you to keep it.” She surged forward with a quickness, almost diving the point of her ebony dagger through your jugular. “So Ima suggest you stop fucking calling me that shit, I'd hate to have to cut it out.”

All you could do was roll your eyes. “Dramatic ass.”

“And you love it.” She plopped back into the seat with a satisfied smile, extending her legs so they now rested in your lap, to which you did not protest.

Riri giggled, reaching into the bosom of her dress to retrieve a small, clear baggie harboring those circular blue pills that she loved so much. Her wet tongue awaited the tablet's arrival, extending out of her mouth in preparation for its landing. And you turned, one hand on the wheel as you watched a gradual cerulean bleed cover her tastebuds. “Want one?”

“No.” All your attention shifted back to the road and your lack of destination. You'd left the hotel to get away from Riri, yet here you were, essentially taking a fucking joyride with her after she broke into your brand-new car.

“Ugh, lame.” She stashed the pills back inside her titties, once again reaching for your phone, and this time you didn't stop her. “Can I put my song on?”

Your brow quirked, “Your song?”

Riri nodded, “Yes, my song. The song you wrote for me!”

“You think I give enough of a fuck about your deranged ass to write a song about you?” You did, write a song about her that was, a couple in fact. All of them about your reprehensible escapades with the groupie who wouldn't leave you alone, the groupie who you couldn't leave alone.

Your entanglement with Riri had managed to bypass public perception, the only thing you executed correctly when it came to her, so her name had never been in the running when the speculations of who your last album could've been about arose. You knew she'd figure it out though, because of course she would.

She kicked your thigh, causing you to smack her ankle in retaliation. “You do. I'm your muse.”

You bellowed a hearty, sarcastic laugh. "My muse? Oh, you're very unwell, Riri." She pointed the blade your way as a warning, causing you to grin triumphantly. "And which song you think I wrote about you?”

“Don't play dumb baby, you can't pull that shit off.” Riri placed your phone back into its holder, her lips curling into a bashful smile when your voice drifted from the speakers, and her song coasted the car's air.

We done played all these games,

Only now I can't wait, I want you now, I can't wait, oh yeah.

The track she chose had indeed been one she inspired. It was also one you avoided entirely, purposefully leaving it off the set list for all of your shows. But again, here you were, subjected to listening to Riri's painfully off-key rendition of the lyrics that symbolized the relationship you two shared.

But she just wanna off my head, I just want the neck instead.

She just wanna fight in bed, I wanna get high instead, oh yeah.

“You think this is about you?” You teased, only seeking to rile her up. “This could be about any of the other girls I done fucked.”

“You know I can't leavе you alone? You know I could never tell you no? Hmm, definitely sound like this is about me. Cause I know you wasn't running back to none of them other hoes like you was running back to me, let's be for real.” She continued to sing, spreading her legs in the process.

It was muscle memory that had your hand descending to her ankle perched in your lap, making you squeeze it before you began to massage it in the way only you knew she liked. And the smile that you failed to disguise when she whimpered was one of instinct, not intention.

“How many girls have you f-fucked on tour, baby?” The question straggled out of her mouth behind a breathy moan.

You hadn't wanted to award her inquiry with any sort of answer, largely in part due to the answer being one that would please her, so you elected to lie.

“A few.” You retorted with a sanguine smirk you deemed sharper than the blade she flaunted, but when your gaze panned her way, the sight awaiting you dulled your smile into a flaccid frown.

She was bunching her dress, thumbing the fabric of her underwear once the hem circled her waist. “Mmm, that's a l-lie.”

Riri made you weak, downright helpless and impotent whenever her authentic huffs of pleasure gained volume. So it wasn't the least bit surprising when her whines from beside you nabbed your attention from the freeway, making it increasingly difficult to concentrate on anything apart from the wet sounds emitted by her dripping center.

Your eyes drifted, and you stifled a moan of your own when you realized she'd graduated from touching herself with her fingers. Riri had the blade locked in her fist, dragging the handle up, down, and around her throbbing clit above her panties.

“Riri, what are you doing?” You bit your lip, feeling your pussy clench around nothing.

She slipped her sticky panties to the side, finally bridging the gap keeping the hilt of the knife apart from her eager cunt. “If you was fucking bitches I would know. Sticking to your rule I see.” You watched the tip of the handle orbit her hole, just before it slowly sank in, getting swallowed by her grip all the way up to the bolster. “F-Fuck baby, I guess this p-pussy really changed your life, huh?”

“I don't want your fucking pussy juice all over my seat. This car is new.” Your scolding tone was feigned, only in an attempt to express a fragment of restraint, but truthfully, every ounce of it slipped swiftly away from you the second you bore witness to that molly hitting her tongue.

You weren't even sure if you were driving on the right side of the road, far too fixated on keeping your composure as your fibers mastered the art of persuasion. They insisted you pull over and allow your fingers to replace the knife, have your tongue relieve the shiny gold hook of its lewd duty of fucking Riri's cunt.

She was thrashing, pumping the back end of the blade in and out, in and out as her squishy pussy sang to you. “Am I the f-first g-girl you let r-ride in your new 'Rari, baby? Ooh, I feel so special.”

“I'm not letting you, your crazy ass broke in. And I mean it, close your damn legs.”

You did the only thing you could think of to get her to stop: you pushed the pedal to the floor, the speed sucking you into the seat as the car surged forward. But beside you, Riri remained a moaning, giggling mess. It was like your accelerated driving, and your admonishments motivated her to fuck her cunt faster as she slicked the knife, making herself wetter. “Hear h-how wet this pussy is for you b-baby? You haven't even t-touched me and I'm fucking drenched. Oh, oh! Shit!”

“Do not fucking come on my seat Riri.”

“Or what? You gonna p-punish me?” She used her free hand to rub coaxing circles into her twitching clit, biting down on her lip as the tool dove deeper into her stretched hole, prodding her sensitive spot just right. “Fuck! It f-feels so good! I'm close!"

You took your eyes off the road, watching her lids droop from the pleasure building deep within, tuning in to the cry clamoring from her tightening stomach.

“Don't.” But you knew she would.

“I can't baby. I-I… Oh fuck!” She groaned, long and breathy, her back arching inward, chest bouncing rapidly from the build-up. Riri screeched the second her orgasm knocked her down, and it was the sexiest sound you'd ever heard. Droves of bliss pillaged her frail body, and she shook violently next to you. “I'm s-sorry... I-I c-couldn't.”

“It's okay.” You were soothing her as she declined from her climax.

The handle glided out of her used pussy, dragging out strings of her oozing cum with it, and the hilt glistened brighter than it did before her hole consumed it. Your quick glances from the knife to the road, from the road to Riri’s seeping cunt weren't enough, you needed to taste her, and it was apparent that she read your mind. “Wanna taste?”

You tried for reluctance, at least your brain did, your body not so much. A steady nod was your only offer, eyes never leaving the road ahead, and you could sense Riri’s grin after receiving your answer. She was excited, pleased, surprised that you gave into her off the first ask, usually she'd have to work harder to earn your compliance. She was on her knees seconds later, left hand propping her up on the center armrest while her right carried the glimmering dagger to your mouth.

She smeared the tip across your full lips, her slickness coating them like gloss, and out came your tongue, drinking in her juices like a parched animal. As always, Riri's cum tasted fucking fantastic, but you refused to give her the satisfaction of moaning. “You like?”

You remained silent, and she smirked, “You love.” She beamed, tapping your mouth, “Open wide baby.”

She was taunting you, this you knew. You were also aware that you were on the verge of doing exactly as she requested without a lick of shame, and you glared at her, unimpressed.

“Please? For me?” She whined.

You couldn't resist her pout, you couldn't resist her, not anymore. So immediately, you promptly parted your lips, offering the stem of the dagger a seat on your watering tongue, your saliva mingling with Riri's sweet, sweet nectar.

This time you did moan, and loud too, fueling her fire just like she wanted, just like you always did. You twirled your tongue around it, sucking and licking every last drop of her creamy cum off the knife handle.

“Backseat. Now.” The only words out of your mouth when she pulled the hilt free, and she clapped, climbing over you as you smacked her ass before pulling the car over on the side of the highway.

•••

“Bend over.” You tried tearing your lips from hers as you spoke, but Riri snagged your bottom lip between her teeth, biting fiercely while her cunt brushed your lap. She kept her eyes on yours, smirking, wanting you to behold the peril swallowing her pupils when she slipped the point of her blackened blade between the buttons of your shirt. She dragged it down, the sharp knife popping each one clean off until your top flew open under her swift slicing.

Your own eyes twinkled encouragingly; you were far too into this; you always enjoyed those seldom moments when you permitted Riri's belief that she held the upper hand.

The tip of her pointed dagger grazed the valley of your unbound breasts, their exposure earning her marvel as she used the bountiful view to aid her desperate humps against your thigh. And you could hear her pussy, you could feel the sticky puddle created by streaks of her first climax seeping through her thin underwear. Her moans were so broken and docile, it almost seemed criminal to make her stop, but you needed her splayed across you.

“You gon make me say it again, mami? You know how I like you.”

With fogged-out eyes, she nodded, stealing one more kiss and shoving the knife into your palm before stretching her small body across the extended center column. Her plump ass elevated to eye level, and you sat back to enjoy the view presented to you.

Lace complimented her skin's deepness far too well. The material embraced her curves, molding to her hips like a second skin, and you nearly let guilt get the better of you for the actions that followed. Your movement was one of speedy precision as you slashed through the bottom half of Riri's dress with the blade she awarded to you, making her gasp.

“This good baby? This how you wanted me?” She backed up a little, seeking some sort of comfort and it clicked then, that this position must be an awkward one for her with the armrest slanting her, and jabbing right into her abdomen.

You bit your swollen lip, moaning from the sweet pain left behind by Riri’s incisors. “Mhmm,” The blade's handle trailed her sticky crotch, “Just like this mami.”

In seconds, you were cutting her cunt free from her messy underwear, kneading and jiggling her exposed ass cheeks in your hot hands. But your pace wasn't up to her liking, and Riri never shied away from voicing her opinion. “You moving too fucking slow. If you gon hi–”

Before her complaint could force its end out of her mouth your palm collided with the meat of her ass, hitting her with unruly force. Her body jerked on top of you, and she yelped, the fragile screech music to your ears. “What you was saying, mami?”

Riri groaned under the rush of pain, then exhaled, and you took this as your opportunity to slap her behind again.

As you ran your hand along her bare skin, you absorbed the heat drummed up from your two hits alone, chuckling. You skimmed the area with your nails, growing more excited watching her twitch. You'd almost forgotten how hopelessly responsive her body was to your touch, even under the faintest brush of it.

“You're a fucking problem.” You slammed an open palm up against her right cheek, smiling at the ripples the collision created in her skin. “Do you even know what you do to me?”

Of course she knew how her actions dictated your decisions, how her guise plagued every divot in your brain. Riri understood her power over you, and it was this very knowledge that had you spanking her again, and again, and again.

“H-Harder!”

Her ass was hot, sore, and damn near swollen. Her tears were heavy streams rolling from her eyes and into her gaping mouth, yet still, she desired more. A resilient little thing she was; you admired her moxie. With every lash, her sopping pussy called on your digits, needing them to plug the dribbling hole expanding the wet patch already existing on your thigh.

“You like that shit don't you? Being in pain?” Your handprint painted her butt cheek, pulling a guttural scream from her throat. “That scream wasn't an answer to my question mami.”

She was full-on bawling, blubbering in your lap when your fingers forced their way inside her cunt unexpectedly, and she lurched.

She sniffled. “Yes! I l-like it!”

“Then shut the fuck up and stop fucking crying.” You smacked her tired ass for the umpteenth time, sliding your fingers through her soaked folds, coating them with all the slick you could collect before ramming them back within her welcoming walls. “You asked for this shit, and you gon take it like the slut you are.”

“Y-You hit like a b-bitch.”

You spanked her once, twice, three times, four times, five; each hit reprimanded her unacceptable behavior as she sobbed with the brown seat leather aching between her shaking fingers.

She wiggled in your grip, wanting desperately to escape the hurtful blows that just kept coming, smack after smack after smack echoing throughout the car. “Not you tryna run Ri, thought I hit like a bitch. Nah, bring that ass back here.” You laughed.

“Please!” Each of her screams made you fuck her pussy faster, encouraged you to slap her ass harder just to revel in her burning skin as Riri cried herself to the edge of her second orgasm.

You pushed up against her nerves, thumb swatting brashly against her swollen clit. “You squeezing my fingers real tight mami, that must mean you finna come.”

“I'm, I'm…” Riri kicked her feet, whining around the deepness of your digits. When she glanced back at you your heart softened just a little. Her big brown eyes were blown the fuck out, leaking fat tears and mascara that seemed never-ending, and she chewed on her lip hoping the action would alleviate some of the hurt. “C-Com…”

Your thrusts slowed, and your hits morphed into a massage as you groped her cheeks tenderly. “Yeah, give it to me, come on my fingers, come all over them.”

“Ooh, baby you f-fucking me s-so good! I’m coming for you!”

She poked her ass out, twisting from side to side as she permitted spasming shocks of pleasure to surge throughout her body at a rapid pace, still backing up into your digits that had yet to depart her hole. “That's it, fuck yourself on my fingers Ri. Show me you can be a good girl, fuck yourself through it.”

It was a difficult thing you’d tasked her with, but luckily for her, Riri thrived off hardship. When the aftershocks subsided, her movements halted and she sighed, moaning low in her throat at the gentle pace in which you extracted your digits from inside her.

“Sit up and come taste it.” You commanded, rolling your eyes when she looked back at you weakly.

With your hand inching toward the hair hanging over her sweaty back, you looped the ends in your fist, yanking her body up until she shifted, then you turned her so her sore ass could plummet right onto the slim storage compartment she was just bent over. “I said sit up.”

Her naked cheeks being forced against the car’s leather prematurely earned you a painful cry. But you didn't care, the reaction only adding to your arousal. You used her parted, wincing lips as an opportunity to stuff her swollen mouth full of your cum covered fingertips, and she gagged from the intrusion before beginning a light suckle. “That's my good girl. Suck them clean for me. You like how you taste?”

“Mhmm.” She hummed around the digits you thrusted in and out of her mouth.

“I know, mami.” You moaned, feeling your clit jump in your pants. “Open your legs, lemme taste that pussy I just made come.”

Riri giggled, separating her sticky legs to grant your salivating tongue entrance. They made a loud squish when she spread them apart, and you could hardly contain your grunt when presented with her messy, bare, pussy lips; your drug of choice. Her cunt's shine danced like diamonds, entrancing you with a beaming glow that could not go ignored. “Shit…”

You reached out for the lever on the driver's side that pushed the seat forward, never once denying yourself face time with her spilling sex. And then you were dropping to your knees, licking your lips before burrowing open-mouth kisses into her sprawled, wet thigh.

Easing her into it failed to make your list of priorities, you wanted her wriggling, squirming with her legs trembling around your face as you slurped her folds. You were also on a mission to feed the starvation gnawing at your gut; it'd been too long since you last feasted on her, and you didn't plan on letting a single drop go to waste.

Your tongue nudged her pulsing clit, licking firmly before you wrapped your thirsty lips well around it, and Riri screeched. “W-Wait baby, wait… Ooh shit.”

And so it began, her pleas for a pause, for you to slow down and allow her to regain her strength. But sadly, her wants were of no importance to you. You trudged on, running your famished tongue around her sweet hole before slipping it all the way in. Riri tapped your head aggressively when you began a slow thrust through her aching walls, and you laughed when your eyes drifted up to see her scrunched face.

“Fuck! Oh.. w-wait..”

“What I'm waiting for Ri? You getting soft on me?”

It was apparent that your comment struck the nerve you intended it to, her huff of annoyance lighting a smile across your face. You refused to let up, licking and sucking the length of her leaking core as she jerked in between broken grumbles. “Ain't nobody s-soft. Eat it r-right and I won't have no c-complaints. Fuck!”

You simply shook your head before diving back into her pussy, rolling her clit in your tongue once more. She whined, the drugs in her system clearly heightening her stimulation, but she took it like a champ, moaning your name breathlessly from above you with her head thrown back.

Riri fisted your curls as you sucked her watering cunt, whimpering where she sat, hips rolling hard into your already stuffed mouth. “Yes! Yes! Just like that!”

“Fuck, I missed this pussy so much.”

“Yeah?” She huffed, tugging your hair to detach you from her center so your stares would align.

Wild eyes scanned your drenched face over, then she tilted your chin, boring straight through your soul with her hopeful gaze. “You missed me?”

You knew what she wanted, and you were fully prepared to give it to her.

“Yes.” Your answer elated her. It didn't matter that in your mind you were admitting to missing her cunt and the way it drooled cum right onto your accepting tongue, to Riri you were confessing to something far more intimate; to Riri you were confessing that you missed her.

The one word, the yes, was enough to bring her to the brink of her third orgasm. But she wouldn't win that easily. You stopped then, just as she was about to fall over the edge, and you let her saturated labia fall freely from your lips before smirking up at her through plotting pupils.

“The fuck are you doing? I was about to come!”

“Ion know, it don't seem like you want it enough.” You teased, making her whine in annoyance. “Need you to beg.”

You'd learned fairly early on that Riri Williams was not a girl easily deterred. With your refusal to allow her release, the job fell on her to complete. Carefully, Riri began to drag her puffy pussy along the lid of the storage compartment she was perched on, hissing in both pain and pleasure as she attempted to make herself come.

You watched her, forever wonder-strickenn by her fortitude. You should stop her, she’d already undergone one orgasm that didn't come from your hands or mouth, and you didn't want that happening again, but the image of her working through the pain brought on by her sore ass cheeks creating friction against the leather was a sight to behold.

“I’m so c-close! Please can I come?!” Her hands found her erect nipples, the standing nubs threatening to rip their way out of her dress. “Please, let me come!”

Her pussy sloshed against the column, her hip jolts splashing her wetness everywhere. Granting her permission would be easy, considering how badly you wanted to enclose her clit in between your lips again, have her juices course your veins like your own personal brand of ecstasy as she convulsed from the shock waves you caused to ripple throughout her body. But you weren't looking for easy, not tonight, not after her behavior.

Your fingers located her waist, holding her still and making her groan in frustration when your strength prohibited her humping. “Mm, do you deserve it?”

“Yes I fucking deserve it!” She yelled, irritated, “Let me fucking come oh my god!”

“That mouth mami. How you gon talk to me like that and think Ima let you come? Hmm?” You parted her thighs, nuzzling your face back into the sweaty space before planting a kiss on her hot skin. “Say you're sorry.”

“No!”

You'd predicted her protest, and you took it as your opening to sink your teeth into her pretty waist. You didn't stop amidst her wails, instead, you dove deeper, biting her flesh with more ferocity. “Say you're sorry Ri.”

Still, she shook her head, standing her ground.

Fuck, you loved how stubborn she was, but you'd never admit that out loud. Luck had been on her side it seemed, because she gave in merely seconds ahead of you puncturing skin, weeping through her words. “I'm s-sorry! I'm s-sorry, baby pl-ease let me come!”

Truthfully you were in awe of how long she held out, surprised by even your own restraint with her pussy lips shoved directly in your face. You were spitting on her bud soon after, suckling her bundle of nerves harshly as you hummed into her quivering sex. “Come in my mouth mami.”

“Oh fuck! Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!” Within seconds of your go-ahead, Riri was gushing onto your face, your seats, squirting on everything in her vicinity with a scream so powerful, the hairs on your neck rose to attention.

“Shit Ri, you made a mess all over my fucking seats. I told you this car is new.”

She awarded you a weak chuckle, on the edge of collapse before you steadied her frail body. “You think I give a damn, baby? You can clean all that shit up with your mouth if you so bothered.”

Her smirk was a thing contrived of pure, unbridled deception, and she sported the smoky eyes to match. These were reasons to incite terror, but for you, they only bustled your intrigue.

•••

The blade danced beneath the strap of Riri's dress, leisurely cutting her shoulder free and you watched from in front of her as the frayed fabric fell gracefully away from her skin. “You putting a lot of power in my hands right now Ri.”

“Mhmm. What you gon do with it baby?”

You moved to the other, repeating your destructive motion before finally positioning the gold-trimmed point at her clavicle, gliding the jagged dagger down her chest. Thread after thread bursted under your descent, doing away with everything left of her torn gown, exposing more of Riri's tender flesh.

Riri watched, bewitched by the way you skillfully maneuvered the blade she'd entrusted to you. “You so fucking pretty mami.”

Words that made her brazen, words that bestowed upon you the power to control her body without the need of a weapon. But you used it still, grazing the edge up her bare stomach as she twitched beneath its scrapes. You stopped once you met her bra, slicing it clean down the middle with your lust-filled eyes glued to hers. Riri gasped, startled by your abruptness and the twinge of danger you knew she caught swimming in your irises when her boobs bounced free, and the small baggie of pills fell from its warm hiding spot.

“You sure you don't want one?” She waved it in your face, and you began to contemplate her question. Riri was no stranger to a pill or two, so her enthusiasm hadn't been a surprise. She always offered, and you always declined, more than content with the natural high you floated on from merely making her come undone for you.

Tonight though, something about the tension building in the car was about to coerce a yes right on out of you. But, something else thieved your attention just as you were about to offer her an answer.

Letters. A word. A name. Your name.

Inscribed into her flesh, squarely below her left breast sitting gorgeously in your face, was a tattoo illustrating your name. You blinked, believing you'd somehow imagined the ink and its placement. Unconsciously, you hoisted the knife up toward the tattoo, running the dagger along each and every letter in amazement.

“Do you like it, baby?” Meek words leaving generally poised lips.

Riri had marked herself in your name, in you. And you decided you did indeed like it, you loved knowing that no matter where she ventured, no matter whose fingers wandered her skin, your claim on her would still exist. Permanently. “This my surprise? Cause yeah, I do like it mami.”

You let your lips replace the blade, kissing the tattoo that exemplified your ownership of her body as she giggled from the heat your breath blew onto her.

“Not your main surprise, but I guess it's a s-surprise.”

Soon your lips were latched to her poking nipple, your tongue swirling and tugging on it. She was moaning, a sound that intensified when she felt the sharp jab of the weapon you wielded circle her other bejeweled nub. “Shit… that hurts so damn good baby. Keep it right there.”

Her whimpers traveled directly to your sopping pussy still locked away in your pants. You were swimming in your own wetness, floating atop a wave that threatened to crash down on you the longer you dragged the same knife she held to the column of your throat around her responsive tits. “Yeah? It hurts?”

“L-Love when you make me hurt baby.”

After letting go of her spit-covered nipple, you flattened the sharp tool against it, watching her hiss under the cool contact. You scuffed the steel bar poking through her pebbled nipple with the knife, humming on key with the scraping sound of metal on metal. “I can keep hurting you, or you can give me that surprise I know you want me to have so bad.”

You aligned the pretty dagger with her sweaty neck, and she grinned menacingly. Before the chance to process her guile even arose, Riri regained control of the knife, using it to assist her in widening your mouth. She wiped the back against your tongue, swiping it down the length of your wet muscle. “Your surprise is up next, in the meantime I need you to stick this tongue out for me before I cut it clean off like I promised.”

“You're cute.” You laughed, but you did as she said. Your tongue extended out, and Riri leaned forward, plopping one of her little happy pills directly in the center, waiting for you to swallow it.

“Extraordinary.” She smirked. And then her lips were on yours, kissing you roughly as she sat her naked form in your lap.

•••

Riri attacked your lips with gusto, kissing you like the air you expelled into her was the very breath she desired for survival, and every one of your pecks matched her intensity. “Baby, lemme make you feel good.”

She broke the kiss slowly, tentative in her release of your hot, wanting mouth. But you refused to let her go, holding and compressing her throat amidst her hand fumbling around on the floor. “Yeah?”

“Mhmm…” A second attempt to pull away made you curious as to what she could be searching for. Usually, her main method of action would be to eat you out until your quaking knees detained her head in their hold, and even then she'd still refuse to let up. But that didn't seem to be her intention here.

You groped her boobs, trying your hardest to pinch one of her sparkly nipples, but yet another threat was tossed your way. This time it was your fingers in jeopardy of severance, so you let her go with a deep chuckle. She leaned to the side, pulling her backpack free from under the front seat and you looked at her inquisitively.

Riri upheld her silence, unzipping the bag from her perched position in your lap.

“What–”

Your question hadn't the chance to escape your lips, because soon the lavender glint of the sizable toy Riri used in the photos dispersed across your bathroom counter reflected in your curious eyes. “Tada!”

“Riri what is that?”

“Um, the fuck does it look like?” She tossed you the harness, worming out of your lap and onto the floor in between the driver's seat and the one you sat in now. Your eyes raked the dildo, examining its shape and the intricacies put into its creation. It looked more… advanced than the ones you were used to, an observation that awakened your fascination.

Riri on the other hand, appeared beyond excited. She fumbled with your belt impatiently before deciding to hack at it with her sharp tool. She popped your button open, and mechanically, your hips levitated so she could guide your bottoms down your legs.

“You this wet and you was talm bout some you not happy to see me. Just be lying for no reason baby.” She laughed, tracing a finger over your pulsating clit and you sighed. With all the straining, and all the buildup you'd been suffering through, that lone stroke could've been enough to do you in, a fact Riri was privy to when she smiled up at you. “Strap up baby, need you inside me.”

You wasted no time assembling the strap and securing the toy in place, and with Riri’s help, the harness was adjusted to your body. She positioned herself across the center console for a second time, sticking her ass out as you kneeled behind her in the seat, admiring the display of her used hole. She backed up onto nothing, trying, and failing to get the tip inside on her own. “You're taking too long! Please, I need you!”

Fuck, you supposed by now Riri's unwavering stamina shouldn't be a thing that caused bewilderment, but it would forever be an entertaining sight. She was sexiest like this; eager; desperate for you to destroy her. “You need it so bad, don't you mami?”

“Yes! Please fuck me!”

She needed not to state her demand again, so you snaked your palm around the tip, pumping it gently before invading Riri's soaked cunt.

The instant you bottomed out, Riri trapped the strap inside her narrowing walls, restricting your movement at the same time your eyes began to roll to the back of your mind. Her wetness, her constricting tightness, the heat derived from stretching her velvety cunt wide; you could feel all of her. It was way too overwhelming, the stimulation weakening your muscles.

You hadn't even gotten a single stroke in and you were already fighting off an orgasm, gripping firmly to her hips in hopes of stopping your collapse. “W-What– Why can– Ri, I can f-feel you. Shit…”

You remained still for a few beats, wanting, needing to savor the snugness of Riri’s warmth before drilling her as she deserved. Her squeeze was intense enough to make your eyes well just a little, and you were certain whenever you did allow that pleasure rush to stifle you, the tears would be unavoidable.

“Surprise! You like it, baby? I made it special for you.”

Of course she made it. You pulled out slowly, then pushed back in, still consumed by the sensation, barely able to keep a steady rhythm as you rocked into her dribbling pussy. “Fuck Ri, this is…”

“Shit! Tell me how good my pussy feels, I'm tight, huh?” Your stamping fingers dented her skin as you began to create a rapidly growing pace of stuffing her full of the faux dick she craved so much, and your thrusts had her quaking around you. Feeling every divot in her pussy walls had only ever been a fantasy, one that existed now as your reality, because you unknowingly chose to fuck a super genius who just so happened to be a little off her rocker.

If you thought you were addicted to her cunt before, this strap just changed the game entirely.

You were fucking her with abandon once completely adjusted, snapping into her again and again with an unrelenting grip on her hips; you’d be admiring the marks you left behind later on. Each thrust sent Riri’s small body forward on the armrest, her cries meshing with your breathy moans that fogged the car windows. “Ooh mami, you so fucking tight. Your crazy ass really made a strap so I can feel this pussy, god.”

Your hips crashed into her bouncing ass cheeks, the impact forcing rushed whines out of her throat. You couldn't tell if the sounds were intended to be words, but truthfully you didn't care, far too enraptured by the feeling of fucking her obnoxiously loud cunt.

Every thrust caused her seeping pussy to squish louder, every squish making your clit thump faster as your high began its heightening.

“Your desperate ass always so damn wet for me, I bet you don't let nobody else fuck you, huh? You know I’m the only one who can treat this pussy right.”

She groaned, attempting to speak through your abusive jolts, “Don't f-flatter yourself, I let plenty of other people hit. This ain't y-your p-pussy.”

It was a trap, an obvious one designed to rile you up, but you chose to fall victim anyway, using the molly floating in your bloodstream to control the power dives you took into her tired little cunt. “Oh it ain't?”

She couldn't even speak with the tip of the strap bludgeoning her sensitive nerves, but she still shook her head defiantly. Riri’s hole gobbled up the girthy toy impressively as you leaned back to marvel at the way it disappeared, then reemerged from inside her convulsing walls.

“Why she leaking this much then? Messing up my fucking seats. So damn wet mami.” You slammed into her cervix. “You make special straps for all them other bitches? You let them slut your nasty ass out on the highway like this? Who else you let use your needy little pussy like this?”

Riri was sobbing, loud and boisterous, almost able to give your screaming fans a run for their money with her pitiful little sounds. A few cars honked on their drive past your parked vehicle, certainly aware of the goings on inside. The Ferrari rocked in tandem with your jabs into Riri’s g-spot, the back and forth motion assisting you in pushing deeper into the smaller girl's sex.

“You hear me talking to you don't you Ri?” A deliberate slap met her welted ass cheek, forcing her to scream. “Why you so quiet? This wet ass pussy louder than that fucking mouth right now. You hear that?”

You fucked her harder, grunting loudly into the air when she squeezed your shaft; she was close.

“Pl-ease!”

“This dick shutting you up or something? Pl-ease what?” You mocked, spanking her again, and rattling her entire being.

She pushed back on the unrelenting curved member digging her out, a whimpering mess when she glanced back at you, catching your eyes with her helpless ones. “Wan– Wanna c-come! M-Make this pussy come for you!”

You tsked, “Thought this wasn't my pussy though. Can't make you come if this ain't my pussy.”

Her broken voice made your cock twitch deep inside her, something you hadn't expected and couldn't control.

“M’sorry, it's yours! M'sorry, it's your pussy b-baby, pleaseee!” She cried, squirming as you rammed into her special spot.

“Fuck… What you sorry for Ri?” You tugged on her locs.

You freed one of her hips, looping your hand under her sweaty abdomen so your digits could press into her clit. God, it was too much for her, the endless pounding, the swift flicking of her bud, the jarring hair pulling. You were barely able to move inside her contracting cunt, but you weren't letting her off that easily. “Tell me what you sorry for.”

“All of it, baby all of it! Sorry for s-sending those videos to y-your girlfriend, s-sorry for breaking into your room, your car, s-sorry for hurting that girl at the bar! I'm sor–”

Your thrusts stopped, “You did what?”

“I didn't mean t-to…”

Cautiously, you pulled the strap from inside her reluctant cunt, falling back into the dampened, sticky seat in disbelief.

And Riri followed you, outwardly panicked when she dropped into your lap. She hung her head in shame as she rambled, wanting to explain herself. “She was just flirting with you and you were flirting back, and I didn't like that, cause you're mine, and–”

You thought back to the bar, to Esperanza, to the thud you heard when you were on the phone with Riri earlier, and you tilted her chin so she could look you in the eyes. “Riri… what did you do to her?”

A sound you hadn't expected, but most certainly should've anticipated rumbled out of her: a chilling chuckle. Gone was her frown, in its place stretched a smile that accentuated her unruly eyes. And of course, her seductive response to your pressing question was not an adequate answer. “Put it back in baby, or I’ll fucking bleed you dry.”

You smirked, teasing her clit with the head of the strap. “Crazy girl.”

Damn her, you shouldn't be enjoying this, but you became smitten with the idea of her hurting someone all because she wanted you to herself. It was sick, you were sick, maybe just as sick as her.

Her pussy was dripping onto your dick, coating the length of it with each grind meant to coax you back into fucking her, and it was certainly working.

Riri brought her trusty blade back up to your throat. She pressed in harder this go ‘round, threatening to drag it along your skin, and you were prepared to let her. She leaned in, her breath a warm ghost kissing you instead of her lips. “How many times do I have to tell you I really, really hate that fucking word. Stop saying it.”

“Would you prefer insane?” You clipped back, spitefully teasing as Riri quite literally held your life in her hands. You should be terrified, the bitch was deranged enough to kill you, but the feeling coursing through you was more akin to fear's distant cousin — thrill.

“I'm not crazy,” You could feel the knife's indentation, and your throat bobbed beneath it. “I'm not insane.” She was gliding the dangerous tool against your neck now, and you felt your skin tear, small streaks of warm blood rolling down your tilted neck, catching Riri's wild eyes.

“I just know what I want, and I always get it.”

You moaned, still rubbing up against her overly used clit, head spinning as you reveled in the heat of your crimson liquid staining your chest and Riri's.

Riri lowered the knife, pecking your cheek lovingly before extending her tongue to the shallow little cut she drew into your neck, running it along the length and licking the beautiful blood decorating the area. “And right now I want you to let me ride you, want you to slam into me and punish me for all the bad things I’ve done. I deserve it.”

The head of the toy was still trapped in your fist, twitching from Riri’s every word. You glided it through her crying folds, brushing her hole but not quite shoving your way inside, and she whined.

“Don't p-play. Please just f-fuck me baby.”

And that was all it took for you to slam up into her hovering hole, bullying your way inside her walls as she screamed from the intrusion. “Fuck! Just like that! Keep fucking this pussy like that! Go deep baby, make me take it!”

“This how you want it Ri? You want me to fuck this greedy pussy like this?” Your violent pumps shook her, and she slapped her open palm up against the window to keep herself upright, the knife clattering to the floor. “Use that nasty mouth and answer me when I fucking speak to you.”

But how could she?

Your hands needed something to grab onto as her addictive heat consumed every inch of your dick yet again, nearly rendering you unconscious, so naturally, they gravitated to her neck.

Your fist was strangling her throat, blocking her airflow and her ability to say words. You used her neck to pull her down onto the throbbing member ravaging her tight wetness, enjoying the melody performed by her pussy far more than any of your own.

Shit, you were going to come, and from the feel of things, you were going to unload inside her. An unfamiliar sensation began to brew inside your abdomen, a tightness you knew well, but tucked behind it was something far more rattling, and you weren't prepared for it at all.

“Ooh mami, I'm finna– I think I'm–”

She tapped your stifling fist, unable to breathe and you let her go so she could cough. “I-Inside… do it ins-side!”

And oh fuck, you felt it, the hunger that Syla had never once been able to truly feed. Riri could though, her strangling pussy walls could do that and more.

Your vision went white, and you were quite certain every star in the galaxy resided behind your welling eyelids. Ropes of your release spilled into her accepting cunt, filling her so much, everything that didn't fit leaked right back out and onto your already filthy seats.

“Fuck! Fuck! Oh fuck!”

“Tell me you love me.” She continued to bounce on the strap. You were so sensitive, you could barely take it, but you tunneled your fingertips into her ass cheeks anyway, aiding her as she rode you through your orgasm.

Riri leaned in, kissing your dry lips, “Say it. Tell me.”

“I love you…” You didn't mean it, not in the way she hoped you did. You never meant it when she made you say it, but it made her happy in the moment, and it made her flood your dick, so you always obliged.

With her pussy drowning in cum, hers and your own, she gingerly eased the strap from inside her, slithering onto the floor to wearily envelop your twitching dickhead in her swollen lips, but your ringtone stopped her.

“It's your girlfriend.” She chuckled jeeringly when she turned to read the name flashing your phone screen in the front.

“Let the bitch go to voicemail.” Your final words before you felt Riri swallow you whole, slobbering on the dildo as she permitted your second load to trickle down her throat.

•••

Serenity swaddled you while you lay there, helpless, following Riri's skillful performance with her mouth and jaw. You were still as the unbound night outside the steamy car windows, watching through drooping, fucked out eyes as Riri climbed into the driver's seat. She revved life back into the Ferrari's engine, stealing you, and driving you off to a destination unknown.

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THIS IS SO CUTEEE IM DYING

SKATER BOI (e-1610 miles x blk! reader)

— miles is a skater boy and u can’t tell me i’m wrong

— felt bad cause the beach fic was supposed to be up today, but instead y’all can have this

— alexa, play feels like summer by childish gambino

— ⚠️: fluff, gn black reader, miles + reader being cute, cursing

standing outside of your door, miles stood with his duffel bag over his right shoulder, and his board wedged between his right arm and torso. ever since you agreed to skate with him, even going as far as to buy your own board, he wanted to surprise you with a little date/gift he had prepared.

you opened your door to the sight of a bubbly presence and a big smile on miles face. "whatchu smiling for?" you questioned with a confused smile on your face.

"get ready, i’m taking you out. oh, and grab your board too," he stated quite matter of factly. before you could even open your mouth, he was already booking it towards the stairs to wait for you at the front of your building.

"damn… now I don’t gotta choice," you mumbled to yourself in the now empty hallway.

closing the door to your house, you changed into more appropriate clothing than the ones you had on now. that clothing consisted of a pair of baggy jeans and an even baggier t-shirt, as well as a beanie to keep your locs from flying into your face. grabbing your board along with the wallet you stuffed in your jeans, you were off downstairs to meet miles.

walking out of the building and on to the street, you turned to look at miles and asked, "so you gonna tell me what’s in the bag?"

rolling his eyes he told you that telling you what was in the bag would ruin the surprise, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

miles had a tendency for surprising you with little things. it wasn’t like he was loaded, but he figured that the little things he gave you were much more personal and meaningful than any expensive gift he could have ever given you; like his art. small photos of you along with other drawings were plastered all over your wall, curtesy of your boyfriend.

after about fifteen minutes of walking, you reached the skate park. you were met with a bunch of brooklyn kids from around your neighborhood either smoking weed, hanging out and skating with their friends, or both simultaneously.

following miles to a set of stairs with a bunch of skid marks on the rail, he set down his bag and his board and motioned for you to hand him yours.

"c’mon it’s part of the surprise," he laughed as he shook his hand out asking for the skate board.

giving him the board, you watched as he set it down wheels facing up, and he opened the duffel bag he brought with him. "of course," you thought.

in the bag was a solar system of different spray paints and paint markers to choose from. you should have known that this would be something miles would do. "you wanna paint my board?"

"I mean, kinda?" he flipped his board so the wheels were facing up alongside with mine. what you didn’t expect was a clean slate. miles board wasn’t painted like it was before, no, this was an entirely new, clean skate board.

"I want to paint your board, while you paint mine," he stated looking up at you and smiling.

"you bought a clean board for me?" you said in a high pitch voice in disbelief.

"don’t flatter yourself now, if it turns out trash i’m goin' back to the old one," he joked. you knew he was joking— miles was in love with everything you made, it was all beautiful to him.

your knees bent down next to miles, squatting with him on the concrete. you grabbed his board and rolled your eyes at his previous statement.

grabbing the screw driver, miles removed the trucks on both of your boards in preparation of painting. once he was finished, you got to work with grabbing the board and going to the other end of the stairs. when he asked why you were "leaving him all lonely" you simply replied with, "you seeing my work of art would ruin the surprise, duh.”

you grabbed the few colors you wanted to use on the board and went back to your side of the stairs. getting to work with spray painting his entire board light green, an image flooded your mind on what you wanted to do with his board.

after thirty minutes (give or take) of working, miles glanced to your side and spoke loudly, "yo, you almost done over there?"

"uh nooo— wait are you already done??" you questioned in disbelief, seeing miles dust himself off and stand up.

"yeah, all I gotta do is shine it," he shrugged his shoulder back and stretched out his arms. you sighed in disbelief at how quickly he was able to finish his freestyle painting. you could practically hear him saying, "i’m just that good" with a goofy smug look in his face.

turning back to your- or his board, you were able to get it done about 10 minutes after miles had finished spraying a clear coat on your board.

adding some finishing touches, his board was finally done. you walked back over to miles with the board flesh behind your back, with the painted side facing away from miles view.

"you ready to see my masterpiece morales?"

"your masterpiece huh?" he questioned feigning an impressed look on his face.

"mmhm, i’m pretty sure I seen this in a renaissance painting before," you said with a nonchalant shrug. miles raised an eyebrow at you.

“sooo you copied a renaissance paining?”

"nah," you whispered, leaning in closer to miles to tell him your big secret. "them renaissance niggas copied me," you said proudly pointing to your chest.

miles rolled his eyes as he backed away from you. “shut the hell up and show me the board,” he laughed.

you huffed as you brought the board into his view from behind your back. it was spray painted light green as it’s base, and what decorated the shade was a large yellow sunflower with the word "MILES" painted dark green and growing out of the sunflower like a stem. surrounding the sun flower were doodles of even more multi colored flowers and hearts.

miles nose flared as he laughed through this nose. he couldn’t help the loving smile that creeped onto his lips as he walked closer to you and grabbed the board out of your hands. he placed a chaste kiss to you lips as he mumbled, "I love it baby, thank you."

you smiled as you wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him closer to you, placing kisses all over his face. you pulled back suddenly and asked, "hmm so where’s MY board morales?"

"don’t worry I gotchu," he said as he pulled away. he walked a couple steps backwards and grabbed the board showing you the absolute masterpiece he made with nothing but his hands and his amazing brain.

it was a horizontal painting of you facing a wall, and on that wall was a collection of graffiti you had painted across brooklyn with miles throughout the years you knew each other. it looked like water color art with the way all of the light colors dripped down together at the bottom of the board.

"okay… so maybe I am a little blown away," you admitted as you looked at the board shocked. turning your head to look at miles, you gently placed the board down on the ground and you ran up to miles with the biggest smile on your face.

you basically threw yourself at him as you buried your face into his neck, mumbling a small "thank you" and "I love you."

as he squeezed you back, he mumbled into your beanie with a smirk, “so am I the best boyfriend ever or what?”

— made this super quick

— bought a skateboard last summer and barely used it

— but TRUST, this year it will be in use

---

tocarte 

while i’m here I might as well spill my life.

WARNING: informal writing and babbling below. some shit might not make sense

so there’s this cute girl from my lit + humanities class thing. super cute and so incredibly smart that it’s sexy. I asked her out and we ate noodles in her dorm room. we fucked around a lil bit and we considered getting stick n pole tattoos lol. I actually have a stick n poke tattoo from my best friend in middle school (still friends til this day.)

at the time i’m posting this it’s 4/22 so 4/20 was 2 days ago. me and the girl I fucked took some edibles we got from a truck. I think i’m still a lil dazed even 2 days later. I think we fucked again lmao. before that me and some friends rolled up in some park deep in manhattan. 10/10 experience would do again.

I think imma ask that girl I was talking about to be my gf. I think that time we ate noodles on her dorm room floor really did it for me. when i’m with her I feel like a fucking cringy teenager but I am 20 so… i’m not that grown. feeling cringy is a feeling i’m trying to disassociate with. me having fun and doing what I want and making corny jokes isn’t smth I should feel so ashamed of. she makes me feel not so ashamed.

been reading some virginia woolf recently. she’s a pretty cool lesbian lol. uh idrk what else to say. so yeah.

later

---

pushing myself real hard this semester. love being the daughter of immigrant parents 🥲

that big PHAT A on my final projects all finna be worth it tho!! then imma be free to continue all my drafts 🙏🏾

college is tiring.. I have a million drafts I could start up and post but here I am being lame asf.

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college is tiring.. I have a million drafts I could start up and post but here I am being lame asf.

I don’t think a lot of readers actually grasp the word count on a lot of your favorite fics.

One single spaced page holds around 500 words.

Your favorite writers are putting out 5-10k word fics.

That’s like 10-20 pages, they’ve got to write AND edit.

Idk all of that to say have patience with us, it takes a while to write what is literally the equivalent of a whole chapter in a book.

this is a need

UNDER MY SKIN

Shuri X Reader

Summary: shuri takes you to Haiti and y’all r cuddling, ur real touchy, Shuri’s kinda soft idk

Warning; none really, just fluff and you and shuri bein real touch-deprived, this was originally a shuriri snippet but I made it x reader

You squirm as you adjust in bed, your face smushed into the pillow as sunlight invades all of your senses. You groan audibly at the exposure to the sun.

Soft gentle lips travel up up your spine, kissing warm skin before finally landing on you cheekbone. Long tattooed fingers wrap around your pretty hips and pull you close.

You let out a soft hum in between light breaths as you stretch your head back briefly. Shuri takes it as an opportunity to wrap an arm across your stomach before she presses a kiss in between the skin of your neck and shoulder.

“Shuri….”You murmur, beginning to turn around to tuck your head beneath Shuri’s jaw. You hear a chuckle from Shuri at how much you’ve been squirming and trying to get close to her. She misses that. Hearing your laughter and picturing your smile against her skin.

“M’tired,” You groan into her skin. you’ve never been a morning person anyway. Ever since college, early mornings and a blaring alarm always made you hate the morning. But now,You’re woken up by the sun and you don’t mind it so much. But the sunlight is still so blinding.

“I know, My love, Go back to sleep,” Shuri whispers, ghosting her nails along the skin of pretty hips, soothing over the marks she’s deposited on you. You shift to your side, throwing a leg over both of Shuri’s. It’s been too long since you’ve felt her comforting warmth.

“I’m trying, You’re in the way,” You grumble in your sleep yet you move closer to Shuri and wraps yourself around the woman like a vine.

“Whatever you say,” Shuri mutters, openly accepting you and wrapping her toned arms around her woman.

Her duties have been on her mind lately. She loves traveling back and forth but Wakanda needs her. The council needs her. Her people need her. But so do you, So she’s taken time to escape Wakanda for a little and take you to Haiti. Where all you two gotta worry about is the bugs and not getting coconuts dropped on your head.

She focuses on the sound of her lover’s heartbeat and tries to tune out the sound of the waves and the fan whirring in the corner of the room. It’s grounding and she feels her eyelids get heavy just because of your presence.

You snuggle closer, sighing into warm skin as sunlight bathes your bodies. Shuri can feel your lashes moving against her skin as you begin to fall asleep. You feel her body go slack against yours and eventually you shut your eyes too.

---