getranched - Ranch Dressing
Ranch Dressing

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Slugs Become Inactive At Temperatures Above 88F. To Think Of One Who Tries To Stand Against I, The Sun,

Slugs become inactive at temperatures above 88°F. To think of one who tries to stand against I, the Sun, is either worthy of legend or a mite of dust bear of any acknowledgment.

Howdy pal, it seems you’re under the impression that you’re better than me

said the slug to the Sun

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More Posts from Getranched

1 year ago

Luna? Have you been teaching people to read again?

Req'd By @voh

req'd by @voh

hm! terrifying!

text: The horse behind our comprehension!


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1 year ago

It’s all the sex with the Outer Gods I think

So, I was going through my armory, making sure that all my mimic countermeasures were still functional (I do not want to see what happens when a mimic absorbs, say, Bloodfang. Not again, at least), and what do I find? Why, it’s the Belmont Morningstar! Specifically from a universe wherein Vlad Dracula Tepes had succeeded in his final plan and had killed all the humans and starved all the vampires, leaving just his night creatures, who then ate all of the large land fauna and died out themselves, leaving a mass extinction with almost the exact same results as the one with the dinosaurs! Fascinating world, that, the next people to evolve on it were honest-to-goodness Fair Folk


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1 year ago

why are you insane

So, I was going through my armory, making sure that all my mimic countermeasures were still functional (I do not want to see what happens when a mimic absorbs, say, Bloodfang. Not again, at least), and what do I find? Why, it’s the Belmont Morningstar! Specifically from a universe wherein Vlad Dracula Tepes had succeeded in his final plan and had killed all the humans and starved all the vampires, leaving just his night creatures, who then ate all of the large land fauna and died out themselves, leaving a mass extinction with almost the exact same results as the one with the dinosaurs! Fascinating world, that, the next people to evolve on it were honest-to-goodness Fair Folk


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1 year ago

Geez you accidentally kidnap ONE child during the winter season thousands of years ago because you wanted to spend some time with your time traveling pirate daughter and suddenly it's Krampus this Krampus that. WELL YA KNOW WHAT?!...

That's actually pretty funny and now I have something to look forward to every year.


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1 year ago

You rang?

You Rang?

If I say Sun’s name three times will she appear in my dorm room like Beetlejuice?


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