The Best Way To Explain To Someone What Its Like To Be An Epic The Musical Fan Listening To The Thunder

The best way to explain to someone what it’s like to be an Epic the Musical fan listening to the Thunder Saga is to inform them that the most cheerful song in the saga is called Suffering

don’t get me wrong, i love patroclus/achilles as a relationship, but the gayest part of the iliad to me will forever be at the end of book 10 when diomedes and odysseus return from the night raid, take a bath together, and then spend an entire line just….rubbing oil into themselves

Me feeling like I'm just being lazy and wasting my time:

Sitting all day.

Listening to music at every waking hour.

Getting high.

Watching videos.

Talking online.

Eating copious amounts of pasta.

Drinking sugary beverages. Taking an ungodly amount of baths.

Not bothering to get dressed afterward and sleeping in my towel.

Sleeping for several hours longer than I 'should'. "I need to stop"

Hermes taking care of me/us/the body:

Resting (sitting).

Listening to music.

Getting high.

Watching funny videos.

Talking to friends.

Eating available food (pasta).

Drinking happy drinks (honey and coffee).

Taking even more baths.

Staying in bed even longer than we're asleep so we can love our cat. "It's okay, darling, live in the moment! Enjoy yourself! We have all the time in the world, be at rest"

Illiad/war of Troy memes bc I gotta cope somehow

I didn't expect much comedy from The Iliad but Book V has me cracking up.

I mean don't get me wrong, there was a lot of bloodshed and violence. The whole chapter was a battle scene. But the end though. Ares just can't get a break 😂😂😂.

I mean first Aphrodite's mother references Ares getting trapped in a fucking vase for thirteen months (Thanatos was far luckier when Sisyphus bound and trapped him because the gods don't hate him) which is already funny as is since I'm familiar with that story.

But then Ares gets stabbed and complains to Zeus about Athena inciting Diomedes and his response to "father I've been stabbed, please control your daughter" is "shut up, I hate you and I regret that you were ever even born" geez dude. "You're just like your mother and if you had any other father I'd let you die from this wound."

It's so devastating but honestly I find it so funny.

Also a side note — I waited like two or three days to actually start reading the story after getting home with the book because the preface (version I have access to was translated by Samuel Butler) took me out but despite the preface (written in English in 1898) being confusing as fuck I am understanding the actual story.

Sure it's flowery and long and complicated but honestly I speak not too far off half the time. But "they did not lard a crib with Chaucerisms and think that they were translating" is not something I understand at all what the fuck are you talking about sir.

He kept talking about the Elizabethan translations and I honestly can't tell if he hates them or respects them. The results are inconclusive because his wording was too flowery to understand — far more flowery than the epic poetry of a 7-5th century BCE Greek poet.

If I see one more person say "sirens aren't like that in the Greek mythology" I'm going to explode.

POLITES DIDN'T DIE IN THE CYCLOPS CAVE

ZEUS DIDN'T GAVE ODYSSEUS A CHOICE AS TO WHETHER HE OR HIS CREW DIED.

ODYSSEUS DID NOT LEAVE CIRCE'S ISLAND ALIVE BY CRYING ABOUT HIS WIFE AND HOW MUCH HE MISSES HER.

POSEIDON WAS NOT AFRAID OF SCYLLA.

AND ODYSSEUS DID NOT READ THE LIPS OF THE SIREN.

Epic is not 100% faithful to The Odyssey, there are events that even happen out of order and Jay has said so. So don't come to me with "that's not how it is in the book" for a detail, it's like they heard that piece of information somewhere and didn't release it

(I'm angry with those who criticize the animators)