Scott: We Prevented A Murder Today.

Scott: We prevented a murder today.

Charles: Wow really? I’m so proud of you two! How?

Pietro: Self-control.

Pietro: How much do you love me?

Scott: Well, look at the stars and count them. That’s how much I love you.

Pietro: But it’s morning.

Scott: Exactly.

Pietro: …

Scott: Nah, just kidding I’d die for you.

Scott and Peter: *Walking down the stairs*

Peter: We weren’t fucking upstairs.

Scott: *facepalm*

Ororo: I would normally say you do you, but clearly you were doing someone else.

Peter: Hey, what’s Scott’s type?

Jean: Dark eyes, oblivious, older than him, loves the color silver.

Peter: Huh, that kind of sounds like me. Too bad we’re just friends.

Jean: Did I mention oblivious?

Peter: Yeah?

Jean: Okay, just checking.

The Brotherhood: Fuck the X-Men!

Pietro: *getting ready for his date with Scott* I already am.

Jean: So this is my wife Jubilation, her favorite color is yellow, she likes her coffee with two milks and nine sugars, she won’t eat cookies that aren’t burnt to a crisp, her favorite season is summer because it’s warm, and she’s the love of my life. What about you?

Scott: Uh. This is my husband Pietro and I think I saw him eat an apple once.