Man Cannot Discover New Oceans Unless He Has The Courage To Lose Sight Of The Shore. Andre Gide

“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” – Andre Gide

It was a sunny day. It was hot, but not so much you would want to jump out of your skin.

The subway was packed, noisy, and, of course, I felt like dying because of it. Too many people for such a little space. No room was found.

After escaping the suffocating chamber, the breeze caressed my skin, playing with the flowy green skirt I was wearing. There were hardly any people, a surprise.

The time seemed to stop and play with the Sunbeams. I felt like I was intruding, so I walked to the shade of the tree in the park, the coolness welcoming me, like an old friend.

The peaceful afternoon started. 

xoxo,

🪐

the time of innocence has passed

the time of experience is coming

learn, heal, grow

- a ghost of a memory

the need of you has passed

new age is coming

blooming, my dearest, is in fashion now

goodbye

-a ghost of a memory

Coward

I'm a coward

I don't have enough courage to make history

I want you back

I had you and now, that you're gone, I say nothing, hoping for the better, despising myself for it

Numb

I don't feel anymore because I was scared of emotions, thinking I'd be better without them

I'm a coward

I don't have strength or will anymore to make it better

Stuck in blank space

Feeling blue and desolate is my comfort now

all over the place

-a ghost of a memory

always and forever ✨

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A little rant about school and system from me...

The problem with education is that we learn to pass and get good grades, it doesn't matter if we have memorized anything about those topics, it is important that the passing grade is good and that has been built into us since the 1st grade of primary school.

Instead of learning because we are interested, that we enjoy reading and maybe researching on that topic ourselves, we are stuck in a room with people we may or may not like that much, from the early morning with barely 4 hours of sleep. We come to school, supposedly learning, although we come out of it even more confused with (minimum) 3 tests in the next week, 4 examinations, 2 large projects that will be at least 50% of the grade and one seminar. Let's get to work.

Okay, I learned 3 subjects, 4 more left, to finish seminar and projects... Wait, my friend invited me to go for a walk... "No, I'm sorry, I'm really busy, but I promise - next time!" Life flies before my eyes and I only sit and study... and for what? Because the system determined so. I miss my friends, I miss being happy, I miss a stress-free life ... When will summer come? Come on, focus! It's not like you're going to need this, but you have to get a good grade.

"No repeating test, come prepared for the test, not to fix the grade next class. Learn to learn for the test, not for correction!"

I don't want to study for the test, I want to study because I like it, because I'm interested in the topic, because I feel better, but how can I do that when I have limited time and a scale from 1 to 5 that determines my value? I'm tired of this system, but again, what can I do about it?

I don't care about grades anymore, that's what.

When I say that, I don't mean "Uh, now I won't move from the armchair, I absolutely don't care, it will be what must be" but I rather think "I won't allow numbers on paper to depress and discourage me, I learn for myself, for my future, to build my personality, not for someone to tell me 'Great, all A's, you're smart' ". I am making my way and my future.

I don't need validation from a broken system to be happy.

(If there are any mistakes, I am not native speaker and I wrote this in my native language, so, please, excuse them.)