"pathetic Wet Dog Of A Dwarf" I'm Screaming

"pathetic wet dog of a dwarf" i'm screaming

never gonna be normal again about fargo incorporating a character like ole munch. here’s this supernatural force of nature killing machine, he is offputting and represents the cost of being forced to bear the full weight of human sin. also he likes pancakes and he serves cunt constantly.

my intrusive thoughts are truly intruding rn

Participation (Ch.2)

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Sharing is Caring

Kili x OC, Fili x OC (Smut!!)

(part one, part three, part four, part five, part six)

Description; This fanfic is posted to my AO3 as well, it's basically just pure filth with my OC Kaia and five members of Thorin's Company, we're continuing on with Fili ;)

MINORS DNI!! smut!! back off if ur a wee one!!

AN; I stand by the headcanon that Fili eats people out like a man STARVING

Translations for any Khuzdul will be at the end! <3

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“Well, what do we have here?”

Kaia squeaks in surprise at the new voice, and both she and Kili look over to find the source of the voice.

Fili stands a few feet away, leaning against a tree. He looks down at the two, head tilted slightly.

“Are we having a little tussle?”

Kili scoffs, raising himself onto his elbows.

“No.” He says indignantly, raising his eyebrows at his brother. Fili smirks, and Kili sits back to pull up his trousers, blushing slightly.

Kaia raises herself onto her elbows, looking between the two brothers.

Fili looks back to her, eyes travelling down her dishevelled form. Her skirts are still hitched around her hips, displaying her legs. Fili deeply inhales at the sight of them, before looking over at his brother.

“Well done, Kili. Finally told her you care about her?” Fili asks, his voice tight.

Kili looks at her, and gives her a small smile.

“There wasn’t much talking…” Kaia chuckles, holding Kili’s eyes as he blushed even more. “But I got the gist.”

“Ah, young love…” Fili chuckles, “What would Amad say about you defiling your lady before putting a braid in her hair, Kee?”

Kili scoffs, leaning back slightly. “Amad will be happy I at least found someone... my One. How far have you gotten with that?”

At that, Fili smiles too. He gives Kaia a significant look, and her breath hitches. Fili’s eyes travel down her body.

Kaia watches Fili, before looking over at Kili. She was shocked to hear me call her his One, but her heart fluttered at the thought. She'd had a crush on Kee since the first week of their travels, specifically since he gave her a flower with a blush on his face. And they proceeded to fall halfway down a hill. He was truly one of a king, and she knew she was falling for him. 

Fili's next words brought her back to the present.

“As long as you made her cum, I see no problem…” Fili shrugs, crossing his arms across his chest.

Kili and Kaia are silent. Kaia avoids Kili’s eyes, clearing her throat. Fili stands still, looking between the two of them.

“Wait.... you made her cum, didn’t you, Kee?” Fili asks his brother, eyebrows raised.

Kili is silent, playing with a blade of grass next to him. Kaia looks over at Fili, who is staring shocked at his little brother.

“Kili. We were raised better than that!” His disappointment is palpable, and if it wasn’t for the fact that both princes looked completely serious, this conversation would be hilarious.

“Fee, it’s no big deal.” Kaia states, sitting up. She pokes her foot at Kili, who looks at her in confusion and surprise. She shrugs, looking over at Fili.

The golden haired prince gapes at her. “No big deal?!” He says, incredulous. He walks over to the pair, crouching down.

“Lass, I know you’re used to the way of men. But, as we’ve pointed out, our ways are much different.” Fili says, seriously. “Dwarven women are precious to us. More than any gem. Making them happy is one of the most important things to us! This is why dwarrowdams have so many lovers. Satisfaction is a must.”

Kaia stares wide eyed at him, utterly confused. Both he and Kili are looking at her in earnest, expressions grave.

“I’m not a dwarrowdam.”

“If you are a dwarrows love, then you are practically one of us. You have the body of man, but your soul is made of the same stuff as us dwarves.” Fili nods.

“Now. Let us get one thing straight, ‘ibin abnâmul (beautiful gem). If a dwarf cannot satisfy his One, then she is completely within her right to seek satisfaction elsewhere.”

Kaia stares at him, confused once again. Both Fili and Kili are watching her, eyes urging her on.

“What do you mean?” She asks, breaking the silence that had grown.

“Kaia, it would be my honour to be your lover.” Fill says, taking her hand in his own.

Kaia gapes at him, before looking at Kili.

“But-”

“Please, amrâlimê.” Kili pleads, taking her other hand in his own. His eyes and words are sincere. “Let my brother take care of you.”

“You’re… you’re okay with this… your brother, becoming my lover?”

“My heart is yours, ghivashel (treasure of all treasures). After tonight, I would be honoured to put a braid in your hair, if you would put one in mine.” Kaia’s heart warms to this, and beams at Kili. The two share a soft kiss.

Fili watches the two, his own smile gracing his lips. Looking at him, Kaia creases her eyebrows.

“You wouldn’t feel weird… or inferior?” She asks Kili, searching his eyes for any sign of discomfort. But, all she finds is love.

“It is an honour to know your lady is desired, to know she is loved by many. I want you to embrace our ways. I want you to never spend a day unsatisfied.” Kili murmurs, reaching his hand up to cup her face.

He shares a meaningful look with Fili. “It would not be odd for us, as we trust each other completely.”

The brothers share a smile, before pressing their foreheads together, before Kili looks at her and winks.

“Plus, we have always shared everything.” He teased, his hand moving to trace along her bare thigh.

“But.” Fili starts, “If you are uncomfortable, or you do not wish to take a lover, or if you do not wish for me to be one of them, that is completely fine.” He brings her hand up to his mouth, kissing her knuckles. “I care for you as my brothers One, nothing will change that. Please, do not feel pressured, sweet girl.”

Kaia is moved, tears prickling in her eyes. The love she feels from both of these brothers is something she has never dreamt of experiencing. She loves them both, in equal measure but in different ways. And she desires them both... 

“I would be honoured to be yours, Kili.” Kaia says, watching as Kili beams, before turning to Fili, “And I would be honoured to have you as my lover, Fili.”

Said prince smiled brightly at her, a dimple forming underneath his moustache braids. He leans forward and presses his forehead to hers. Kili kisses her hand, and Kaia feels her whole body glowing with happiness at this turn of events.

Pulling back, the older Durin prince looks over Kaia’s body. Kaia feels herself blush, her cunt fluttering at his heated gaze.

“Now that we’ve gotten all of that sappy shit out of the way…” Fill murmurs, looking over at his brother, “Let me show you how to properly pleasure a lass.”

Kaia giggles as Fili leans forward and steals a kiss, trailing his lips over her jaw, down her neck and gently bites her shoulder.

File crawls on top of her, gliding his hands over her shoulders, and across her chest. Kaia moans as his fingers touch her breasts over her corset. Fili chuckles into her shoulder.

“Sensitive, are we?”

“Stop teasing me, you fucker.” Kaia groans. Both brothers chuckle lowly at this, and as Fili moves his head down to her chest, Kaia watches as Kili leans back on his elbows, dragging his hand lazily over his crotch. He winks at her, taking his lower lip between his teeth.

The sight of watching him fondle his growing bulge, and feeling Fili drag his teeth over her clothes nipples make Kaia whimper, clenching her knees together to get some friction to her core.

File grabs at the top of her corset, tearing it open to give him access to her tits. She gasps, arching her back. The prince damn near groaned as he eyed her heaving breasts, taking a nipple between his lips. He sucked hard, making Kaia moan and squirm below him. He flicks the other nipple with his finger, his other hand moving to shuck up her skirt even further up her body.

His skilled finger found her cunt immediately, tracing his fingers across her sensitive slit.

“Fili, fuck!” Kaia groans, bringing her fist up to her mouth to bite down on her knuckles.

“Let me hear you, badgûna (lady of my dreams). Tell me what you need.” File groaned around her breast, moving further down her to press kisses along her stomach.

“File please… I need you… touch me…”

“As you wish, sweet girl.”

Fili plunged two fingers into her, pressing into her until he was knuckle deep. She gasped and moaned low, eyes rolling back at the combined feeling of his fingers on her breast, his lips on her stomach and his digits pumping into her.

File scissored his fingers into her, adding a third as her cunt began to grip him harder. She was a moaning, writhing mess as he dropped his mouth lower. Pushing up her skirt, his golden mane disappeared between her legs.

“FILI!” She screamed, as his lips latched onto her clit and sucked, hard. Stars appeared in front of her, as an earth-shattering orgasm hit her. She went silent, unable to form words as Fili continued to suck, four fingers pumping into her pulsing cunt as she came in waves over his face.

Kaia arched off the ground, hand moving to his hair pulling hard as he overstimulated her poor clit. He sucked and licked at her like she was the elixir of life, tasting her and urging her to give him more, he himself groaning as she tugged on his scalp.

Kaia opened her eyes to look at the stars above, vision blurry as her body built up to another orgasm, painfully on the precipice.

She moved her eyes from the sky, travelling across the landscape until they fell on Kili.

He was on his knees a few feet away, slightly hunched over as he fisted his cock. He was red-faced, mouth open wide as he pumped himself hard, his cock red between his white knuckled grip. He watched her writhing body, before turning his eyes to hers.

Immediately, he let out a loud groan, staring her in the eyes as his body shuddered, his cock releasing ropes of cum onto his hand and stomach.

He slumped over, still fisting his cock as he shook.

The sight alone made her cum again. She bit her lip to stop herself screaming out again, arching her back until she could see the world around her turn upside down. Her body erupted, her muscles spasming as she fell into complete bliss.

File gently played with her whilst she came down from her high. Waves of pleasure cascaded through her body like flashes of starlight.

She loosened her grip on his hair, running her fingers through it to bring her back to reality.

“How do you feel, ghivashel?” Fili asks, resting a hand on her cheek. Kaia lifts her own hand up, resting it atop his own. She is sweating and exhausted, but her heart is filled.

Yet, she still was not completely satisfied.

Looking over Fili’s dishevelled person, she noted his half-lidded eyes and rosy cheeks. His mouth is covered in her release, his moustache braids damp. His clothes are askew, his coat pushed slightly down his arms and his shirt slightly unbuttoned, revealing thick golden hair across his pecs. Travelling her eyes further, she bit her lip taking in the bulge between his legs.

“You’re so good with your mouth, madtubirzu…(golden heart)” Fili’s eyes and smile widened at the pet name, unaware that she had taken time to learn some Khuzdul during their journey.

Kaia smirked mischieously, reaching down to grab at Fili’s erection. “…but how are you with this?”

Fili grins devilishly, leaning down to press his lips to hers. His kiss was slower than his brothers, expertly dancing his lips over her own. She continued to grope him through his trousers, and he ran his hands through her hair in response, as he growled low in this throat.

He rises up to his elbows, looking over his shoulder at his brother.

“Are you watching, Kee?” He calls.

Kaia looks over towards Kili, who is now sat reclined against the soil, trousers done up again as he watched his brother and his lover.

“I thought you were going to show me how to pleasure her, Fee, not how to tease her and act like an ass…” Kili chuckled, winking at Kaia. She bit her lip at the brotherly teasing, enjoying their dynamic.

“Big words from a dwarrow who came the second he got his end away!” Fili sniggers, throwing Kaia a wink. Kili goes to say something else.

“Too much talking , not enough shagging!” Kaia groans, glaring good-naturedly at her boys.

Fili looks down at her, mouth open in faux-shock. “Wow Kaia, you’ve got quite a mouth on you.”

“And she knows how to use it…” Kili drawls, biting his lip.

“Alright, alright. She’s right, too much talking.” Fili leans down slightly to grab her by the backs of her thighs. She squeals as he lifts her legs, bending them and pressing her knees to his chest.

On impulse, she tries to shut her knees together, but Fili slides himself between them, trapping himself against her. He grinds his hard, clothed length against her, rubbing against her clit. Kaia gasps, staring up at him with blown out pupils.

Fili smirks at her reaction, nuzzling his nose to hers in a nose kiss. They share a smile, before Fili sits back on his knees, undoing the ties of his trousers.

“You might want to hold onto something, lass…” He groans, pulling out his cock and stroking it at the sight of her splayed out for him.

His dick is beautiful. Slightly shorter than Kili’s but thicker and curved slightly. Fili grabs her hips, pulling her up slightly as he looms over her.

“…I’m not going to go easy on you.” With that, he thrusts into her fully.

Kaia screams, throwing her head back as he fills her instantly.

He starts fucking her hard and fast, hooking her knees around his arms to open herself fully up to him. He sets a pace which is harsh, pulling her up and down his length in tandem with his own thrusts.

Above her, Fili groans and pants, staring down at her as sweat beads onto his forehead. Kaia stares up at him, mouth hanging open as she takes everything he gives her.

His hips hit her own at an angle, bumping against her sensitive clit every time he thrusts into her. Kaia can feel her head spinning and the coil inside her tightening with every punishing thrust.

Fili lets go of her knees, in favour of grabbing her ankles, lifting and stretching them up to place them against his shoulders. He leans down, foldering her in half under him, hitting her at a deeper angle.

Kaia’s vision goes blurry, digging her fingers into his tunic and becoming a writhing mess beneath this beautiful dwarf.

The new position has Fili hitting a specific spot inside her over and over again, bringing her closer and closer to yet another earth shattering end. Fili holds his forehead against hers, his hot breath fanning her face and their own sweat mingling.

Movement catches Kaia’s attention to her left, and she turns her face to watch as Kili lies down next to the humping pair. He watches her face, biting his lip as she smiles at him with a blissed expression.

“My beautiful girl…” Kili murmurs.

Fili continues thrusting into Kaia, pressing his sweaty forehead into her shoulder as his thrusts became more erratic.

“Kee, play with her clit.” Fili groans, his own hands too busy with playing with her tits and grabbing her hair in a vice like grip.

Kili doesn’t need to be told twice, he reaches between them and starts rubbing her clit in figures of eight, nuzzling into the other side of her neck. One of Kaia’s hands detangles from Fili’s tunic to grasp onto Kili’s unoccupied hand, and she feels him kiss her neck.

The coil inside her tightens almost painfully, and she can feel herself on the precipice once again

“I’m- I’m going to-”

“Cum, ‘ibin abnâmu. I want to feel you cum on my cock.” Fili moans, fucking her with abandon.

“Cum for us, Amrâlimê!” Kili pants, sucking on her pulse point and rubbing his hand against her clit.

Kaia does just that. Throwing her head back and letting out a silent scream, she loses herself in her third orgasm of this amazing night.

Kili kisses up her neck, kissing her cheek, her temple, her forehead and then her nose. She looks back down at him, and he gives her a dazzling smile.

Fili lets out a groan from on top of her, and she feels how his cock pulses inside of her as he finishes, filling her up.

She drags her hand through his hair, forcing his head back to look into her eyes.

Blue eyes meet her own, equally blissed out, ones. He gives her a smile, kissing her gently before pulling out of her, causing them to both sigh.

Both brothers collapse on either side of her, taking each of her hands in their own.

Kaia feels Fili’s seed slipping out of her, covering the ground beneath her. She lets out a contented sigh, excited to have a wash soon…

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We're all whores here :) thanks for reading, chapter three will be up soon!! First four chapters are posted on my AO3, if you can't wait!

Translations ~

Badgûna – dream girl ‘ibin abnâmul – beautiful gem Amrâlimê – love of mine

i love them, ur honour