Can I Talk About The Rarely Mentioned Loss Of Identity That Comes With A Relationship With Jumin Han?

can i talk about the rarely mentioned loss of identity that comes with a relationship with jumin han?

like if you were seeking any kind of recognition for your skills, hard work, passion, or talent before meeting and falling in love with jumin you would have to basically give it up to be with him

and not because of him either don’t get me wrong he has some controlling tendencies that both of you would have to discuss but the real problem would be everyone else

let’s say you were a passionate artist and your art while not national aclaimed was fairly popular then you marry jumin and suddenly all the news stories about your art refer to you as wife of C&R corporate heir Jumin Han. there’s whispers about how you probably got the gallery opening because of Jumins influence and that the only reason you can stay home and create art is because Jumin provides for you and i bet jumin paid for your lessons and that’s why your as good as you are

the same goes for ANY career even remotely in the public eye we even see this with jumins mom when zen mentions she was a singer but she was more famous for her marriage than her singing don’t get me wrong jumins mom may have been a gold digger i don’t know but i can absolutely see how upsetting it would be to put so much time and effort into something only to have all that work be dismissed because of who you love.

just some thoughts

Retrouvailles (part 2)

Jumin x MC fanfic (1122 words)

Part 1

over all summary: MC is the Singer at her Family’s wine bar called “retrouvailles”. Jumin Han corporate heir has fallen for her voice and decided to pursue a relationship with the Jazz and swing singer despite his usual distaste for romance. they face the challenges of press interference and hearsay, as they explore the waters of new romance.

Chapter summary: Jumin and MC have arranged to meet for a non-date to discuss the possibility of a future date. MC explains her concerns and Jumin see’s a softer and more genuine side of her. one he hopes to see more of. 

Retrouvallies feature song presentation: lady armstong cover of Mr. Brightside

authors note: sorry its short and not much happens >.< i really think its important that MC explain her fears and that Jumin hear her reasons for wanting to keep everything on the DL also like i got really lost in Jumin just experiencing a younger and more lively crowd since its not his normal scene, also i hope y’all are enjoying reading this even a quarter as much as i enjoy writing it. I’m sure i look crazy speaking MC’s lines to myself as i drive in my car alone to work but its fun.  oh also the name of the bar is a french term that refers to the feeling of reuniting with a loved one after a long time and is directly translated to reunion. IDK it just seemed classy and feel good.

Retrouvailles was far busier on Fridays than Jumin was used to. Absent where the familiar faces of the regulars that came to enjoy MC’s singing, replaced instead by a slightly younger crowd eager to celebrate yet another work week passed. For all the class it held it was easy on weekdays to forget that Retrouvailles was still a bar that come weekend, it’s nights would be filled with a slightly more wild clientele focused more on venting the weeks frustrations than winding down quietly. if he were being honest he would say he preferred the more relaxed Thursday crowd of familiar strangers, he had never seen eye to eye with people who worked to live rather than lived to work after all. The raucous chatter aggravated a headache that had started from a difficult business deal only an hour previous. He raised his hand to rub at his temple when a waitress approached him.

“Mr.Han? if you don’t mind MC has actually saved you a booth I could take you there if you like.” Jumin felt the smallest hint of joy bubble with in him at the thought that MC had set aside space for him, he wondered absently if she had made the arrangements to secure them a quiet area so they could talk. He nodded politely as the waitress led him to a booth just to the side of the stage tucked away from the bulk of the crowd. She had thought of everything it seemed as he spied a dark bottle of wine already chilling in an ice bucket ready to be served.  

As he sat, the waitress poured his glass of wine and spoke gently “MC has selected a Douro red port for this evening and she asked me to tell you that she will join you after the show begins if you don’t mind waiting.”

“of course thank you for showing me over” he could see the waitress blush a bit and absently wondered what MC would look like blushing like that. He shook his head slightly to refocus himself and sipped his glass as he watched the crowd from afar. Soon enough the music began and he shifted his focus to the stage. MC was not singing tonight he knew but Retrouvailles was known for its live music every night and apart of him was curious as to who could take MC’s place on such a big night. They called themselves The Lady Armstrongs and they were good, but he missed the smoky velvet that was MC’s signature.

Half way through the second song he heard a familiar voice just behind him. “miss me already? You look a little bored.” She teased her voice cutting through the sound of the bar to ring clear in his ears.

“I’ll admit it’s nice to hear your voice again”

“carful now Jumin or that silver tongue is gonna get you in trouble”

“oh really” he countered in the same teasing cadence “it’s served me well so far” she chuckled and the sound of her laugh rolled over him like gentle waves.

“you certainly are confident” there was no bite in her words he noted, as she sat down.

“I see no reason not to be” he replied, and it was true he knew his worth, his strengths and weaknesses, he had come to terms with them all and found no point in playing at insecurity.

“good point.” She laughed resting her forearms on the table between them leaning forward slightly to begin pouring herself a glass of wine “oh! I see you’ve already tasted the wine do you like it? You seemed to enjoy your port yesterday and I know this is supposed to be one of the best of its vintage”

“it’s exquisite, thank you” he smiles lifting his glass in a casual toast before she took her first sip of wine.

“Good” she sighs, a bit of nervous tension relieved at his words “ah I um I thought about your, offer”

“and your decision?”

“surely you must know that a relationship with you comes with a lot of baggage” she sipped nervously at her wine eye’s locked on the table between him.

“baggage?” he prompted. If this was a rejection he would make her say it clearly, he deserved that much at least. She was watching the wine swirl in her glass as a means to avoid his gaze which was locked on her.

“I’m not a media darling, Jumin. I like the spotlight but only when I sing. I’m worried about what would happen if word got out that you were dating me. What happens to C&R or Retrouvailles? As much as I’d like to pretend that it would all be sunshine and daffodils, I know better.”

“so your saying no?” he asked. He understood her hesitance, she was right about the media complicating things. He had seen it with his father far too many times when his father would fall for women who were using him they would twist the media to suit their purposes. A story leaked here a picture spread there, a scandal rarely affected C&R too much, but Retrouvailles was small and a scandal could put them out of business. Still he had to fight the disappointment in his voice as he tried to make himself the impassive emotionless man so many claimed him to be. He could tell by the look in MC’s eye’s he had failed though.

“that’s just it, I don’t want to say no.” it was then that she finally locked eyes with him and suddenly her cheeks were a ruddy red but her hand was on his trying to keep him from pulling away as he had been about to do. “what I want to say is, can we get to know each other privately? I mean would you mind terribly if we kept our names out of the papers?” something in her tone felt so raw he knew there was no way he could refuse her even if he wanted to.

“I wouldn’t mind at all” he could see her shoulder sag and hear the smile in her voice when she spoke again.

“thank you” he wasn’t sure he had ever heard someone sound so genuine in his life. Later if he was asked when he truly fell for her, he would cite this moment. The genuine smile and gratitude she offered him for something so immaterial and inconsequential wrapped his hear in emotion before he could even decipher its meaning. He could feel her hand still on some part of him registered the smile that crept on his face without his permission. Had he ever struggled not to smile before her? He didn’t think so.

Hey. If its not too much can I request RFA finding out MC was abused as a kid after they have a panic attack/episode about something RFA did/said thats usually considered innocent, but has bad connotations to MC? Only if you're willing. I saw some of the other things you wrote and thought you might be ok with writing things like this. Im really really sorry if I'm wrong. Have a nice day.

okay so a couple of disclaimers here

1 i have never experienced abuse so please note that this may not be accurate to real abuse recovery

2 while i have had panic attacks they were few and far between and not connected to consistent anxiety or reliably predictable triggers

3 if you or anyone you know is experiencing abuse or suspects abuse reach out get help. you and they deserve better 

anyway i hope this is okay since its a bit of a departure from my real life experiences 

The RFA when MC who was abused has a panic attack

Jumin

-        When you first break down he doesn’t know how to help

-        He gets down on your level if you’re in a chair he’s knelt in front of you if you’re on the floor he’s right there with you.

-        He talks you through breathing exercises he learned to help with business stress

-        He stays with you no matter how long it takes NO ONE can separate you two

-        It isn’t until you explain that he truly understands what happened

-        He asks you to tell him EVERYTHING that makes you even the littlest bit uncomfortable and he avoids it like the plague

-        He also does a lot of research on how to help someone through a panic attack so he’s prepared if it ever happens again

-        He learns grounding techniques and how to help you visualize a safe and happy place

-        He encourages therapy and begins donating to charity geared towards preventing child abuse regularly

-        He’ll never understand how family could do that, they are supposed to love, cherish, and encourage each other

-        He reminds you that you are a han now and no one will ever hurt you again. He vows to show you what family is meant to be

Yoosung

-        You’re in his arms the second your he sees you break down

-        He rocks you gently and hushes you gently

-        Its repetitive and grounding and honestly helps you calm down a lot

-        As soon as your calm he helps you get ready for bed, he’s never had a true panic attack but he knows how exhausting it can be to cry like that

-        Later he asks what happened and listens intently

-        The whole time you explain he’s deathly silent and your done he pulls you into a gentle hug with shaking hands

-        You’ve never seen him angrier. It’s a cold anger that stole the light from his eyes

-        He’s careful not to let you see how truly furious he is though he might text zen to vent about how shitty people can be but he won’t mention you or parents because he wants to respect your privacy

-        He starts being extra careful about raging at video games so he doesn’t remind you of your family

-        From that moment on he makes sure that you are close with his family he wants you to experience a warm and happy family

-        He also sets about making sure you experience everything you may have missed as a child

-        He wants to replace every bad memory with 10 good ones

Saeyoung

-        He recognizes the behavior in an instant and is gently guiding you to the couch

-        His voice is gentle and slow as he reminds you that you are safe, you’re here with him. You’re an adult and far from anyone that would try to hurt you now.

-        He’s chanting these phrases like a mantra and your nodding along repeating after him to help ground yourself

-        He’s careful not to hold you to tightly or move to quickly and make things worse. He knows all the major things that can trigger those feelings of helplessness and makes sure to memorize the little things that are specific to you

-        He watches your face to know when things hit too close to home for you and always has a way to get you out of those situations discreetly

-        When you explain what your home life was he holds you gently and reminds you that none of it was your fault.

-        He tells you that just because some people should never have had kids doesn’t mean those kids shouldn’t have been born it means those kids deserved better.

-        Honestly you opening up to him helps him open up to you about his experiences

-        It actually ends up being very therapeutic to both of you

Zen

-        When he sees you shaking and sobbing his hands are on your shoulders before he can really think about what he’s doing

-        His grip is firm and steady as he locks eye’s with you his gaze is piercing and he refuses to let you look away

-        “breath with me jagiya” and you slowly start to synch your breathing to his deliberately slow and deep breaths

-        It isn’t until you’ve completely calmed down that he pulls you into his lap and lets his breath go ragged with worry

-        He wants to beat up your family but he knows you need him to be calm right now and he’ll do anything for you

-        He was never physically abused by his family but he knows the emotional side of abuse all too well.

-        He makes sure you know your worth reminding you of everything he loves about you.

-        he hears about “open when” letters from a coworker and makes you a bunch for when your anxious, or sad, or insecure. You keep them on you all the time

-        he’s careful to never be violent around you because he doesn’t want to remind you of your family

-        He tells you that blood family isn’t nearly as important as the family you choose. He promises that both of you will make your own family

Jaehee

-        Doesn’t know what to do when you first breakdown

-        Is very worried and awkward because she doesn’t know what caused the breakdown and doesn’t want to make it worse

-        Once you calm down enough to talk you tell her what happened and her face goes pale

-        She asks if she can hold you because she’s worried you may be touch sensitive right then you nod and she pulls you into a gentle hug

-        She tells you that people often take their own insecurities, stress, and anger out on people who can’t defend themselves. When they do that they are being cowardly and petty

-        She mentions that none of it was your fault you were young and should have been protected and nurtured not hurt and cut down

-        She suggests therapy and does research to make sure you get good treatment

-        She even puts together a panic attack kit

-        It has lavender spray and a pocket watch to help you slow your breathing and focus on something external

-        The kit also has a small notebook to keep track of triggers, panic attacks and thoughts. As well as your medicine if you take any

so cute!

i wanna knit everyone a hat! can y’all tell me your top 3 favorite colors! oh and do y’all want pompoms or a yarn flower decoration? i just want you all to have something so you can always think of me!

They answered it... But the app glitched and discarded it.

I love this! How about Red, white, and grey for me? With pompoms. Or if you'd like you can do pastel colors!

~Zen🥀

Oh! Um... Yellow, green, and blue? With flowers? That'd be so cool!

~Yoosung⭐

Wow. Uh... Like sun set orangey yellow, coffee brown, and cream? With flowers? If you can't find those, that's okay!

~Jaehee☕

I don't really have any favorite colors... But Id like purple, blue, and white. With pompoms. Please.

~Han Jumin

Oooo! Red, yellow, and black! Whoot whoot! With pompoms!

~707🚀

Um... I don't really have any favorite colors. But I'll give you some of my favorite colors to paint with. Amethyst, mustard, and dark grey. With flower please. I can't wait to see them.

~V📷

Did I said that I love your writing? Because I do

oh good golly why are you so nice and cute?!? thank you so much you don’t know how much that means to me! mystic messager is the first fandom i’ve posted writing for (i wrote a long zelda fic way back in highschool like hand wrote 27 pages and then lost all of them >.>) so it means a lot that someone enjoys it!!

the RFA with sick MC who nests

okay so while growing up both my parents worked so anytime i was sick i was left home alone to rest. my solution get everything i might need that day together when i have to get up and hunker down in a nest of my own creation. trash can, tissues, thermos of hot tea, medicine, blankets, pillows, phone, phone charger. literally anything i thought i might need because sick me has no energy and wont want to get up to get it later.

so this is the RFA dealing with an MC that does the same thing

Jumin

-        Called the doctor for a home visit the second he found out you were sick

-        Appreciates you resting

-        Will meticulously dismantle your nest every night (much to your dismay)

-        If he finds you asleep in your nest he’ll carry you to bed and tuck you in

-        Doesn’t understand the behavior and asks why you do it

-        When you explain that it’s a habit from being sick alone a lot he vows to never leave you at home alone when you’re sick

-        Since you said no to the home nurse he decides to play that part instead

-        He works from home and does most of his work while sitting next to you so he can get anything you might need

-        Doesn’t get sick at all. Probably by sheer force of will, or because his nutritionist makes sure his immune system if perfect

Yoosung

-        Finds you completely nested up on the couch asleep

-        He is so worried and sets about un-nesting you

-        Takes your temp, moves to lay you down on the couch, and changes your fever compress

-        Calls his mom to get her special soup recipe (she swears it can cure anything)

-        As you’re eating the homemade soup he’s brushing your hear since its gotten messy while you slept and nested, he doesn’t want you to have to struggle with knots later also he knows it helps you relax

-        Best caretaker ever

-        Until he gets sick too

-        And now you are both nested up on the couch leaning against each other suffering together

-        Seven sends them groceries via delivery and all it has in is weird home remedies he read about on the internet

-        Yoosung tries them all

Saeyoung

-        Canned soup and crackers

-        Cuddles your blankets bundle and actively facilitates your nesting (because that’s basicly what he does with his compute when he works

-        Plays youtube videos until you fall asleep

-        Carries you to bed and sets up the more essential parts of your nest before catching up on the work he’s missed by staying with you

-        Doesn’t get sick from you but probably passes out from exhaustion

-        He worked when you slept and took care of you when you didn’t, meaning he legit stayed awake for 4 ½ days straight

-        Now vanderwood has to take care of both of you (vandy is not happy about this and swears if either of you throw up on him he will leave you to die)

-        But he does make the best porridge

Zen

-        Thinks you are way too cute

-        He’s got no problem with you nesting as long as you leave room for him to cuddle up next to you

-        He doesn’t care if your sick he isn’t going to miss out on holding you

-        Offers you medicine every five minutes despite the medicines recommendations (look he just wants to help)

-        Kisses you despite you saying he’ll get sick

-        He does get sick but its only for like half a day

-        You’re a bit miffed because you were sick for an entire week and it took him half a day?!?!

-        Has no concept of how to help since he’s never been sick long enough to worry about

-        Gets advice from Jaehee and follows it EXACTLY

-        Looks up recipes for good meals for people who are sick and tries to make them for you

-        (emphasis on tries)

Jaehee

-        Mom mode activate

-        Cooks you homemade porridge with bananas because she herself has a sensitive stomach when sick and knows that helps

-        Doesn’t let you leave bed saying “the body heals best when you rest”

-        So you don’t even get the chance to nest. She’s dismantling your nest before it even starts to form

-        Gives you your medicine on a strict schedule no extra no skipping “those guidelines are there for a reason MC”

-        Wears a mask because she cannot afford to get sick but she isn’t going to leave you to fend for yourself either