Snape : Mr Potter, Why Arent You In Detention Last Night?

snape : Mr Potter, why aren’t you in detention last night?

harry : i...uh with hermione in the library

hermione : harry, i was at the common room with Ron studying charms.

harry : I....uh.. with Ginny helping Professor mcgonagall

Ron : Ginny was in the library with Luna and neville.

Snape : Mr potter, please...give me a decent reason why you are not in detention last nig---

Pansy : Draco, is that a gryffindor tie around your neck?

Arthur : *saw Molly knitting another sweater* are you knitting again? Honestly dear, you should stop having another kid everytime I’m out at work.

Molly : *without looking up* I’ll stop when you stop asking the function of a rubber duck to every muggle wizard you met.

Sweat and Smoke

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky wants to play on a mission.

Warnings: SMUTTY AF (18+), Language, Semi-Public Sex, Dirty Talk

A/N: I haven’t written in a while and am trying to release the cobwebs with sum smut. I also wrote this at work because i am str8 trash. Please reblog and comment lovies!!! xoxo

“What’s your status, Buck?”

“We’re on the south side of the facility – currently hidden from view but, there are a large group of hostiles that I believe are east of us – a couple rooms down,” Bucky whispers into his coms, his eyes sliding over you as you lean back against the wall. “We’ll wait for your command.”

“Sit tight, guys,” Steve responds before the line goes quiet.

“I’m bored,” you mutter before kicking the side of the wall with your boot. “We’ve been stuck in here for two hours.”

The two of you were at the corner of a long hall outside of a door that led to a storage unit. You’d both been caught off guard by the number of agents there had been during the mission and Bucky had forced you down a hall into hiding. 

You were stuck waiting on Steve to give you the go ahead to take out the remaining hostiles. It didn’t help that the facility was horribly hot – the air similar to swampy summer heat.

Bucky glances down the hall before turning back to you – his expression unreadable. He quickly flicks a small button on the inside of his coms before leaning over and doing the same to yours.

“What is it? What are you doing?” you question impatiently, swiping strands of hair off your wet forehead.

“I was just thinking of a way we could pass the time..” he drawls slowly as if testing every word out of his mouth.  “After all, we didn’t get to finish what we started this morning, baby.”

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Blackmail | Bucky x Reader NSFW

Synopsis: “You” accidentally send Bucky a picture of you in lingerie. 

Warnings: NSFW Content/18+ Only; Teasing, Dirty Talk, Fingering, Female Receiving Oral, Toy (unspecified vibrator)

A/N: I got this idea off of a prompt @imjustafriendlynobody sent me! (Thank you again for helping me!)

“Does this look okay?” You opened the dressing room door a smidge.

“Yes,” Wanda responded without hesitation. “Red is your color.”

“I want it, but I don’t have an occasion for it.” You muttered as you peered into the nearby mirror.

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THIS TOO I NEED I NEED MORE

Young!Reader x Uncle!Kol

Requested By Anon

Part Two  Part Three Part Four  Part Five

“Well hello Darling.” Kol hummed when he found you sat alone.

  “Hello Uncle Kol.” You pouted up at him and he smirked.

“What’s wrong?”  He let you shuffle up and sit closer to him.

You pointed across the garden, the rest of the family were fussing and cooing over Hope. Kol couldn’t help but feel irritated. They always left you out, of all people he thought Klaus would understand.

  “How about I take you to the park?” Kol offered and you grinned at him.

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