You Know Whats Probably More Fun Than Playing Chess? Cheating At Chess

you know what’s probably more fun than playing chess? cheating at chess

“ohhh would you look at that, my pawns found jesus and now they’re all bishops”

“so i realize it looks like i’m putting a thimble on the board but actually my rooks have been using their downtime to build another rook, one that’s better, stronger, faster—”

“hey welcome back. while you left to get a snack, those six pieces you’d captured slipped their guards, tunneled to safety and emerged right in the middle of your royal palace.”

“oof, looks like you’ve got my king cornered…maybe this is a good time to mention that shortly before we started playing, my pawns and knights revolted and instituted a representative democracy. feel free to kill the puppet ruler that was the one remaining vestige of our tyranny, you cringing servant of the crown. vive la revolution!”

hey @ladyaster3 I’m having Dr. Kane play flashbacks.  He would have loved it if he could have had a dog pull of the joke.

This is an absolutely true statement.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that everyone deserves the right to free healthcare and @seananmcguire absolutely crushes #tumblrbot.

I agree!

October Daye Drinking Game

With love and apologies to Seanan McGuire.

Toby ruins a pair of jeans: Take a sip.

Toby is up and fighting within minutes of an injury that would kill a human: Take a drink.

Toby is up and fighting within minutes of an injury that would kill a full-blood fae: Take two drinks.

Seanan starts repeating descriptions of just how bad pain can get: Finish your drink.

Someone is a dick to pixies: Take a drink.

Tybalt quotes Shakespeare: Take a sip.

Quentin sasses his knight: Take a sip.

You want to pet Raj, and it might be worth losing a hand for it: Take a drink.

Someone around Toby is lying about who they are: Take a drink.

Various authority figures already knew about the lie: Take two drinks.

A teenager is kidnapped: Take a drink.

The teenager is Toby’s family: Finish your drink.

Bridge Troll Taxi Service: One sip per barghest.

Dianda has to be restrained from killing someone: Toast the only woman with any sense here.

Deus Ex Luidaeg: Finish the bottle on her behalf.

Greek dude: But…but I brought you a bouquet of olives to win over your heart!

Sappho, lounging on a couch with her girlfriend on her lap, popping grapes into her mouth: Oh muse, singeth to us Despacito.

not sure if I can explain this very well because my grey matter is going downhill tonight but honestly, azula getting beaten by one of zuko’s new ride-or-die pals is a much more profound victory for zuko than him beating her himself