"You are dripping on my lovely new floor," said Rafal. Rhian blinked at the black stone tiles, grimy and thick with soot.
595 posts
Books 1-3, Oversimplified:
Books 1-3, Oversimplified:
Rafal: I knew it. You're Evil!
Sophie: And whose fault is that, darling?
Rafal: ...
⸻
Agatha: I hate you and you're an idiot!
Tedros: Well, I hate you and... wait, hang on, I love you.
Agatha: Great. Now what are we going to do?
Tedros: I—
Agatha: Stop talking. That was a rhetorical question.
Tedros: Wonder what Sophie's up to these days...
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More Posts from Liketwoswansinbalance
Things That Could Only Be Said by Rafal - Part 1
Rafal: If I must be killed, I don't want to be killed to death.
See the reblog for the second poll.
If it weren't for genre and target audience constraints, Rafal could have been so much worse. (And yet, there's already one human trafficking count against him in canon, I know.)
Still, I have a headcanon that he'd have bodies exhumed, shortly before decay sets in with zero regard for the deceased's loved ones, to study them, and not for art like Da Vinci did, but for learning anatomy in order to torture the living more effectively.
The "fluffy" part of the headcanon would be that he would threaten Rhian with creative yet anatomically impossible torture when Rhian doesn't listen to him, and Rhian would recognize it could never happen and just know Rafal is looking out for him.
It’s probable that the most pathetic, Rafal-core thing one can do is pack one’s black and navy shirts in a suitcase before leaving because one has to let a small, open wound breathe without a bandage and can’t visibly seep blood all over the sleeves of good, white shirts. 0/10. Would not recommend.