Neroburningrome - Nero - Tumblr Blog

The betrayal of feeling inescapably human.

A sound argument, but you've failed to consider I am God's most perfect tranny

That feeling when you've outgrown your home town.

 When the streets and shops are the same. The layout and shape of these places anchored in your mind. You still see the snow settle on the asphalt, then melt, then fall, then melt, then never fall again. 

You can breathe anytime the rotting of a martyred hedgehog on the side of the road, cooking in the summer sun.

Your elementary, middle and high school all stand, like an empire that thinks is eternal, your mom has seen their moulding corridors too.

You will look at the silhouettes of passers by, not seeing them as neighbors but as ghosts roaming the bakery, the church, the store, the train station.

You have a map of every path and little spots branded with hot iron in your heart

Yet you don't know this place anymore, you don't live in it like you used to.

You just feel trapped by the billions of millions of thousands memories crowding every centimeters of the town that watched you silently die then open your eyes and retry.

Now you're terrified that this town may see you die again.

When did you stop feeling at home ?

Did you even felt at home ?

“You are not a reflection of the people who can’t love you.”

— Caitlyn Siehl

im tired of trans men/mascs always having to make themselves smaller for the sake of not being berated by both the queer 'community' and cishet folk alike.

oh, your name is bug, you like big eyeliner and dyed hair, kandi, and use he/they? you're too trans, you're embarrassing the community.

you're stealth? you exclusively want to dress and present male? you don't want anyone to know your trans? what are you, ashamed of yourself? do you hate other queers? you need to out yourself to make fem people feel safe!

you're a trans boy but you like pink, frills and dresses, your hair is long and you don't bind? faker. you're making the whole community look bad. you are not actually trans.

you want to take testosterone, get jacked, shave your head and grow a beard? you are making women uncomfortable, you can't call yourself a trans man anymore bcs you pass too well, you aren't welcomed in this community.

see, see how there is never any winning? and still, i come online everyday and see trans people infighting, all of these things are said by both cis transphobes and actual people who call themselves transgender. just stop it. whoever you are, be proud, take up space, and especially make room for other trans people who are different than you. being a transmed or whatever is doing just as much help for both the trans community and yourselves as, like, the trump administration has.

Love as a death sentence. Love as an inescapable doom, looming over your every breath, its gravity too strong to resist the fall. Love as a cruel dramatic irony, how long before you fail to look away ? It won't matter, it never matters. You're already dead.

My least favorite things about anti- UBI discourse is always the techbros whining that "nobody is going to work anymore! People will just watch Netflix all day!" and I have 2 responses:

1) Who the fuck cares. Who the fuck cares what people do with their time! That's kind of the fucking point!

2) People aren't going to stop laboring. Housework (look, it's right there in the word!) will still need to be done. So will maintenance on our homes and personal spaces. Children will still need carers, as will the elderly and disabled. There are millions of examples of ~work~ that we do all the time, uncompensated, that won't suddenly stop because we aren't forced to sell our labor to provide corporation's profits.

I'm not surprised that what is traditionally women's work is invisible to these dipshits, but it never fails to anger me.

Anyway. Join the IWW.

I fully believe that if Nikolai knew Darkling’s full plan, he would’ve joined him.

And what if I'm a violent dog ??? What if I KNOW exactly why I bite ??

Please more relationship portrayals that isn't sex centered ! I'm so tired of physical attraction being the sole indicator of (most of the time) romantic feelings. I want to know what bonds them together! What opposes them ! What they mean and shift in each other's character arc !

There no need to be so explicit, only to see devotion leek of their eyes !

LET. US. GUESS.

The thing I love and appreciate so much about Kanej is that they are an example of the deeper more nuanced aspects of a relationship that is so often overlooked in modern media.

It's Kaz loving Inej's laugh, it's Inej paying such close attention to Kaz that she can tell when he passed out just from the change in his breathing, it's Kaz emptying his life savings to buy Inej her freedom, it's Inej about to kill all the Dregs just to save Kaz, it's Kaz buying Inej a ship so she can have her dream of hunting slavers even though that means they'll be separated, it's Inej accepting who Kaz is and acknowledging that even if she didn't always agree with his methods that the Barrel needs him just as he is.

It's how well they know each other, that their relationship is based on friendship and mutual understanding, it's the little things like Kaz seeing Inej and feeling like a little boy who believes in magic again.

It's so much more than the typical modern portrayal of love that requires touching or sex to telegraph what two people feel about each other. They never need to hug or kiss or hold hands for us the readers to know how they feel because Leigh put the effort into portraying the beauty and depth of real love that modern media so often doesn't bother to attempt.

Regardless even of the fact that I, and many other aroacespec people, feel represented by Kaz, Inej, and their relationship, their relation and interactions with each other shows the aspects of love and friendship that is so rare in modern medias. And especially for younger generations growing up with TV and books, seeing love portrayed as sex or physical attraction can be very misleading and leave them confused when those things don't give the satisfaction in real life that it is given in media. But Kanej is the balance of that, they are real love, portrayed in the ways that show what real love is.

Young boys and girls and non binaries and every other gender or type of person can read these books or watch the show and see what real love is. They can see they don't have to sell their bodies or give up their boundaries to satisfy another person and that none of that would guarantee being loved, that love is so much more than just physical attraction, that being known and valued for who you are as a person in the current moment is the most important thing.

I want to make this another TedTalk about why I take issue with Kanej being portrayed in fanfics and fanarts as touchy or needing that to show they've healed or that their relationship is valid, but I'll keep this one focused on the positives so I don't get all the aphobes and haters clogging up my notifs ◉⁠‿⁠◉

Having thoughts about Kaz Brekker being a farmer’s son. They call him Dirtyhands, but his hands were supposed to be dirtied from tending the earth, not from the blood of the people he’s killed. Or something.

cool cool cool. cool. yeah. fine. don't even care. normal about it and like, don't even care at all. cool

OMG he's so funny in the books, I just love this sarcastic little shit

Kaz in the show: *has no sense of humor*

Kaz in the books: your mom

Once my gender is officially 'Gerard Way', it's so over for y'all

Being non-binary is wild bc what do you mean I'm a rat looking eldritch god trapped in a hot girl's body ????

RIP Jesper, you would've loved 2010s white girl music 🗣️🗣️🗣️

People always talk about the Kaz and Wylan parrells but have we ACTUALLY went in and talked about them??

They both lost their parents around the exact same time. In the books Kaz is one year older then Wylan and his dad died when he was nine. Marya had "died" whenever Wylan was eight years old. Both had their lives flipped upside for the worst in the SAME YEAR.

Both of them had their lives ruined by a man they put all their trust in and fought to get revenge for. With they BOTH did.

Kaz only fought back because he wanted revenge for Jordie. Jordie was his sole purpose for ticking and going after Pekka. Wylan's was Marya. His mother. Throughout the first book despite wanting to get back at his father, he still feels guilt and is more afraid of him then revengeful. But after he learns his mother is alive?? After he learns what his father did to her? That is his motive. That is what kept Wylan going. And Kaz knew that.

PWATER WATER WATER DORNWING REBIRTHING SO MANY PARALLELS OH MY GOD

Both Kaz and Wylan were rebirthed from the water. Kaz states that the child he used to be had died, and for Wylan's sake its the same. Wylan Van Eck died that night just like Kaz Retived did. The only difference was that Wylan didn't kill who he was. He just pushed him down.

(Fun fact to note that Wylan has his own scheming face as well others point out)

And the show does not hold back on these parallels as well but also shows how opposite these two are. Both of them hid so much of themselves from the person they loved and they BOTH admitted it in a momment of trust. Wylan asking Jepser what his passport says, and Kaz telling Inej about how pekka killed his brother. And even then they both still hide the full truth. But unlike Kaz, Wylan doesn't pull away from Jesper. Even if he doesn't tell him that he is a Van Eck. Wylan accepts the key. Kaz keeps his armor on.

Wylan had every chance to become Kaz, and Kaz had every chance to become Wylan.

There's a lot of speculation about Kaz's full name and Kazimir stands out often. but I need to tell you that for every french person 'Kazimir' is this mf :