
rowan, they/them 22|AuDHD|Chronic Illness|Horror Enthusiast Book Blogger
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Another Writing Update Maybe
another writing update maybe
okay, it's been a bit but i've been bip boppin around doing a few things.
i'm about two and a half chapters into my story, and even though it started off a little rough (i haven't written in a few years so i'm a bit rusty) but i think it is going pretty well for right now. it def could be better but i have been keeping notes on what i would want to change for my next draft so it is going to be a lot better.
i also got a bit of writiers block, mostly because i wrote like 2k words in one day and i think i def fried my own brain. but in the meantime i played the sims and did other slightly creative stuff like makeup and small things like that to stay in the creative mood. it kinda sounds stupid but i think it helped me keep the motivation to want to continue to write.
next! i started reading flawless by elsie silver to stay on the southern/country/cowpoke romance vibe. it's pretty good, though i'm only on chapter like 13 but i do enjoy it so far.
i'm almost done yappiing, it's just been a bit. but i think once my first draft is mostly written i could explain more of the plot/synopsis on here so i know fully of what is going on. Thanks for listening to my yap lmao
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More Posts from Prince-of-pages
twitch streamer era?
so, i've been really into productivity streams for a while, like a read with me/write with me stream, or even a reading/writing sprint stream so i made my own twitch??????
i dunno when or how long i'm going to stream since i am just starting off, but if anyone would like to follow or hang out with me while the streams are going feel free to!
https://www.twitch.tv/prince_of_pages
i'm gonna be so honest right now, i have been playing the sims all day and haven't read anything.
to be fair i kinda wanna write something and i do want to base the characters off of my sims so you could say i am working out my plot for the book. or you could say i wanna slack off a little. either way sims is cool and i wish i had the horse expansion pack man
creepy puppets scare me

so i knew absolutely nothing about this book going into it and turns out i hate it!
not really, i do really like the writing and the story so far i'm almost six hours into it and i honestly do not have any complaints.
i just get really creeped out by dolls and puppets, especially clown dolls/puppets so this book is actually a little scary to me but i do really enjoy it!
i hope it sticks this well throughout it because i do like this author a lot and i want to get into his other works. but anyway, if you've read this book let me know! i'd love to hear your thoughts!
very overdue reading update
okay so
last i said i finished the winners which closed out the beartown series and i adored them so much. i love benji and i have done a heavy amount of reading since then.
i ended up dabbling in a genre i'm not entirely familiar with, that being romance. i read and finished the chestnut springs series by elsie silver in the span of 12 days and i really enjoyed them believe it or not. though i hated the last one and i will personally fist fight beau eaton myself.
now to shift from all of that sappy lovey dovey stuff i am reading
drum roll
a little life by hanya yanagihara
yes i know how sad the story is and no i do not think i am prepared for it but i feel like this is the time in my life i just need to bite the bullet and finish it.
that being said, since starting streaming i have been really good with my reading goals and i've been flying through books. this has been really good for me and i'm so happy that i have reached affiliate on twitch so i can start earning money on doing something i love.
i think i might wrap this post up soon but if you are interested in watching me on twitch and would like to join reading sprints you can check out my link in my pinned post, i stream every tuesday, thursday through sunday at 10pm est.
i've been feeling really good. reading slumps do pass
Hi! What is your very specific Twilight AU?
okay, so. New Moon.
party disaster, dumping her and dipping, all happens normally.
but THEN. Bella finds out sheās pregnant.
(and I know youāre thinking- pre-marital sex?!?! Edward would NEVER! but listen. I am the author now. Iāve been around Christians my whole life. shut up!)
so anyway after a million pregnancy tests and a lot of googling about vampire baby legends, Bellaās like...well this is probably gonna be a situation,
Nessie doesnāt have an insane growth rate here because I hate that, so she has a normal amount of time to prepare, and sheās very...aware that the birth is gonna be Rough at best. So she goes to Jacob
who is NOT a wolf yet but Is aware of the pack and the treaty, and they are closer friends already, and sheās like āhey. paranormal emergency. youāre the only person in this town who enables me. help.ā
Ā and Jacobās like Iām Fucking Fifteen and goes and gets Leah, since sheās technically an adult and a girl
(ms. meyer How did you make one of leahās only 3 character traitsĀ āupset sheās infertileā and then not have her support bellaās choices in breaking dawn please make it make sense)
Ā so they start brainstorming solutions and the best they can work with is. Bellaās gotta ride out the pregnancy in hiding. they have no way of knowing whether she can survive the pregnancy and the only clue they have about whether the baby will be a monster or not is from google searches, but they also canāt exactly take her to an obgyn when her uterus feels like itās calcified and her ribs are getting broken and she seems to be craving blood
So, Leahās got her own little place. Bella moves in there, telling Charlie she wants to move back in with Renee (she knows her parents would never willingly call each other so as long as she keeps up communicating with both of them they should be none the wiser of her growing a little dracula in Leah Clearwaterās basement).
Leah has already defected from the wolf pack at this point (because...the Cullenās left and she didnāt really like any of the guys anyway lmao) so they donāt run the risk of them hearing her thoughts while sheās in wolf form. She goes out and hunts animals, brings them back and her and Jake drain the blood from them so Bella can drink it. All three of them find this extremely disgusting obviously but Jakeās loyal and a little bit lovestruck, Leahās a supportive friend and queen, and Bellaās just trying to keep her and her baby alive, and none of them feel like trying to rob a blood bank
Bella is 100% certain the baby will just be a baby who happens to like blood, like she was in bd, but the tentative plan is that if a crazy soulless monster comes out of her Leah will...handle that...
Which neither are thrilled about, so Bellaās just trying to focus on staying positive. And between that, trying to survive and stay hidden, Bella doesnāt really have time to...Check Out the way she did in new moon. Like, sheās absolutely still depressed, and sheās still getting an occasional Edward hallucination because carrying a vampire baby counts as reckless in many books, but sheās just more...resigned and pissed than anything. Sheāll have days like theĀ āpossibilitiesā scene, but more often than not sheās just telling the Edward hallucination to go fuck himself when heās begging her to find the real him so they can have Carlisle deal with the pregnancyĀ
at some point, Seth gets roped into the whole mess (heās prone to just breaking into his sisterās house) but since heās like, 13 and The Best Baby Boy heās immediately supportive. He didnāt even fucking know about the wolves and the vampires until he walked in on a six months pregnant Bella drinking blood while his sister and Jacob are hacking away at a dead deer, but heās like...you know when you were 13 and sneaking around about Anything made you feel like the coolest person alive? point is heās helpful
AND he can get away with spending a lot of time at Leahās house without anyone finding it weird, unlike Jacob, so he starts spending most of his free time there keeping Bella company and brightening her day up
HE is the one who enables her when she comes up with the name Renesmee lmao
(just because she hates Edward doesnāt mean Esme ever did anything wrong!)
ābella Iāll throw you out of this house if you donāt come up with a real nameāĀ āleah sheās white you canāt just disrespect her culture like this omgā
anyway these four become the DORKIEST and WEIRDEST little family itās cute
so then. labor.
itās less...graphic than in bd because Bella hasnāt been actively dying the whole pregnancy and she doesnāt snap her spine in half, but itās still. bad.
she essentially delivers a rock that Nessie then begins chewing her way out of. sheās actively bleeding out. Jacobās having a panic attack. Leah made Seth watch so he would never have unprotected sex and the scare tactic is working. Leahās covered in Bellaās blood which is not great considering sheās Holding A Rock That A Vampire Is Emerging From
Leahās been taking classes and researching deliveries so she needs to stitch Bella up and see what else is wrong but Seth is rocking back and forth on the floor crying and Jacobās screaming and pacing too fast to grab so sheās like. Bella babe I know youāre dying but you need to hold this thing for me ksjdfllksf
so while sheās handling That, Bellaās got this weird little rock in her arms and is watching the baby slowly fight itās way out like this is a very fucked up egg or something and sheās just. overwhelmed. maybe itās the blood loss but sheās looking at the messy, scrunchy little face and sheās already in love and envisioning their lives together.
and then, you know, the baby bites her,
she has just enough time to thinkĀ āhow did we not think to prepare for thatā before she can feel the venom coursing through her. itās just as bad as she remembers from Jamesā bite but somehow...easier to tolerate. she blacks out pretty quickly
the other 3 notice and are like : ššš
Jacob...literally explodes into a wolf On Spot
Seth darts out the fucking door heās seen enough for one day
Leah, sole holder of the braincell, realizes Nessie just bit and isnāt drinking from Bella, and deduces this is like...a survival instinct or something. the baby instinctively changes itās mother first thing. weirdly...touching?Ā
So she gets the baby and checks that everything is physically okay with Bella (apart from you know. changing species) and is like...guess this is an issue for 3 days from now Leah
more immediate pressing issues: screaming new born baby and oh, yeah, the giant red wolf in the basement,
āJacob I know this is disorienting but if you break anything in my house Iāll fucking kill youā
she really just leaves the poor boy to go get the baby cleaned up and warm up some of the frozen blood theyāve got in her fridge (RUINING HER TUPPERWARE, BELLA)
sheās not worried about the wolf pack mind meld yet because she knows Sam took the guys on a mission way farther up the coast for a few days and theyāll be too far away to hear Jake. hopefully, by the time they get back, Bella will be awake and theyāll have made an escape plan by then
and as sheās bottle feeding blood to the baby sheās thrilled that it seems to be like...relatively normal and not s horrific monster or anything. mission: unwillingly murder my best friendās baby has been successfully canceledĀ
āOh Goddamn it....Renesmee DOES fit you...ā
Seth, from where heās cowering behind the couch:Ā ātold youā
so, Jake eventually calms down, they spend the next few days cooing over Nessie and brainstorming how to handle Bella when she wakes up a vampire, and also nicknaming NessieĀ āNessieā because they know Bella will find that intolerable and they feel she deserves karmic punishment for stressing them out so much lmao
so, three days are up. Sethās upstairs putting on a way-too-elaborate puppet show for the baby with not a care in the world. Leah and Jake are in the basement because they know Bella probably wonāt want their wolf blood and their ready to phase in case she gets a little aggressive
but she just wakes up and is like. hey! howās it going? whereās my baby?
sjdhfksdj they were expecting feral but Bella still has her super self-control. she didnāt even realize sheād changed into a vampire until they told her lmao
Bellaās a little too freaked out to try hunting yet so they give her some of the stored blood theyāve been feeding Ness and sheās like. good to go. Leahās about to scream like have the elders been exaggerating this whole time or is Bella truly a freak??? lol
So, they spend a couple days just...relaxing, Bella and Renesmee bonding, theyāre trying to come up with fun places Bella can move to with the baby so no one she knows finds out, and every now and then Leah and Jake go out and she tries to help him get the wolf thing under control
and then,,,,the pack get back from their mission early
and immediately are able to read Jacobās mind
so they head over to Start Shit because thereās two bloodsuckers on their land but,
the pack not attacking because Jake imprinted on Renesmee? tired. the pack not attacking because Jakeās Alpha Genes have taken over and declared Nessie and Bella as part of his Pack and attacking would literally start a war? inspired
so they hash the whole thing out....ultimately Sam decides Bella is more of a victim than a threat, and since neither her or Nessie seem to be going on a bloodlust rampage any time soon...he decides to grant them immunity from the wholeĀ ākill the vampiresā rule. Heāll let her and her daughter stay in La Push as long as they agree to stick to animals and only hunt out of town. PLUS from what little Bella knows about the Volturi, sheās worried about them finding out about Nessie, so theyāll offer protection if that does happen, in exchange for her being able to help them with intel on any other vampire threats in the area (you know like. if a nomad is fucking stuff up in a nearby city, theyāll send her to talk to them first before deciding if they need to intervene. Sam has become acutely aware he has a lot of teens and kids in his pack, so heās trying to keep them out of fights as much as possible)Ā Ā
anyway thatās the story of Nessie gaining like 17 chaotic as hell ride or die uncles,
letās fast forward a bit
itās like 15 years later. Bellaās not living with Leah anymore, but sheās got a cute apartment in a nearby town, and owns and runs a bookstore on the first floor of it. she got her ged and did college online and teaches night classes at a community college. Sheās still in contact with her parents, who Adore the life out of Nessie. She still helps the pack out and theyāre all close. Nessie is a handful but in a fun and lovable way. They go on little weekend trips whenever they have time. Bellaās happy.
but then a. Situation. arises.
basically, the Volturi have been made aware of some unknown vampire chasing others out of the pacific northwest and conspiring with shapeshifters. and you know when Aro gets curious he tends to spin things dramatically. whoās to say this vampire isnāt conspiring against all vampires? against them? why has no oneās special talents worked on her? he simply must find out.
Bella and the Pack get word and decide their best course of action for now is to go on the run. theyāre not gonna be able to take on a whole army but if they can bide some time and lay low they might be able to figure something out
except Bella is like....I have a teenage hybrid that the Volturi donāt know about yet...it would be EXTREMELY irresponsible to take her with me
but she canāt send Nessie to Charlie or Renee because they donāt know about her...dietary restrictions. She canāt stay with Billy or anyone else in La Push because the Volturi might trace the packās scent there and discover her. Sheās panicking, they have to leave in a few days max and she canāt find a safe place for her daughter
and then sheās like.....fuck.
she had run into Jasper a couple of years ago- they have the same forgery guy and were heading to his building around the same time as a coincidence. She promised to forgive him for the party incident if he promised not to tell Edward he saw her and that sheās a vampire now. He agreed, but then told her Edwardās been living on his own for a while now and insisted on giving her his number...she never could bring herself to call it or delete it...but now...if she wants to be 100% Nessie is safe and protected...
fuck
So, the past 15 years have been fairly rough for Edward
heās still convinced leaving in order to save Bella was the best course of action, but like...the vampires canonically mate for life. thatās his soulmate. heās absolutely miserable without her. heās thought about cracking and going to find her again but he always talks himself out of it, convinced sheād just tell him she hates him or something
so as stated in his patented Edward Cullen Self Loathing Guide, first thing to do is isolate yourself from all the lovebirds you usually live with. Sure, he keeps in contact, but...not well. heās currently living alone and posing as a university student. Heās not even really sure what heās supposed to be majoring in. Heās mostly been in a haze since he left Forks.
and one day....he gets a call from an unknown number. he ignores it, thinking itās a spam call. but then it calls like 8 more times in a row and he figures answering might be a bit smarter than simply throwing it at the wall
And Edward...swears he came back to life and immediately had a heart attack the second he hears Bellaās voice
He feels breathless and disoriented the whole conversation, trying to figure out if his memory did her voice any justice, trying to rush out 15 years worth of apologies, trying to comprehend sheās actually speaking to him.
But Bellaās very blunt on the phone. She doesnāt want to let herself get emotional. Sheās on a time limit, and she has to focus on getting her daughter to safety
And Edward swears he somehow misheard her the first ten or so times she told him. He had a daughter? that wasnāt possible
āshe has the audacity to be your Evil Twin so Iām pretty sure itās possibleā
so she gives him a rundown. she needs to go into hiding, no I donāt need your help with that, gives him details about Nessie, what sheās like, what she likes to do, her diet, her favorite color, how annoyed she is by this whole situation,Ā āEdward I know you donāt love me anymore, but I remember how protective you were, and thatās what I need Nessie to have right now. She needs you right nowā and Edward wants so badly to refute Bellaās claim of lost love, to tell her he has absolutely no idea how to be a parent, but...her tone is aching so much he can barely speak. He canāt let Bella down again, and he canāt let this little girl he foolishly created and left down anymore than he already has, either.
So he agrees, she tells him to be at the airport in a few days, and hangs up.Ā
Edward loses about half a day staring at a wall in shock, before he jumps into preparations.
Bella told him while their daughter possessed some speed and strength, hunting was fairly dangerous for her. She was more delicate than his kind, and had a heartbeat. Reheated blood bags had been their best option, and she also needed human food as well. He also had to get a room ready for her- he wandered around stores for hours, reading young girls minds to see if there was any furniture or decorations that were universally liked- which was of course, fruitless, but he did manage to find a handful of things he was sure Bella would have liked at that age, and prayed for the best. He somehow got himself covered in purple paint that was a nightmare to get off. Bella had sent him some forged documents claiming Nessie was his younger sister heād won custody of, and he got her enrolled in a nearby school. He lived every day leading up to her arrival staving off a panic attack.
it wasnāt until he was on the way to the airport that he realized he forgot to inform his family about this life update. they mustāve been on a hunting trip, because he got nothing but voicemailsĀ
imagine being Carlisle and you come home to a voicemail from your son whoās banished himself from the family thatās just likeĀ āhi. youāre a grandfather now. Iām having a nervous breakdown and might crash my car. call me back at your earliest convenience I supposeā like what would you DO
Ā after he gets to the airport he starts panicking again, realizing Bella had never actually sent him a picture, worrying about how heād find her, but then- he sees a tiny girl with untamed, dark red curls, features strikingly similar to his own that are pulled into the expression Bella always made when she was reading, absently chewing on her lip, and before she looks at him with her motherās big brown eyes, he already knows who heās looking at, and heās certain if he was human his tear ducts would be having a fit right now
Renesmee, however, seems less willing to have an emotional meeting. She mumbles out a simple greeting before gathering up her bags and heading for the door, Edward rushing behind her to try and help
listen. the awkwardness of Charlie trying to connect with Bella. but 10000x worse because of Edwardās overthinking, self-deprecating ass and Nessie being likeĀ āah yes the guy who broke my pregnant teenage mothers heart, fantasticā lmao
the car ride is p a i n f u l. Edwardās trying so hard for light conversation and Nessieās barely giving one word answers. Bella had warned her about the mind reading so she was carefully keeping her mind blocked, which Edward is trying very hard to be understanding about instead of annoyed, but By God does he want to know everything about her
when they get back to his place, she quietly thanks him for the room and then promptly locks him out of it lol. He spends the rest of the day just pacing back and forth until he realizes he should eventually feed her lmao
and thatās...kinda how the first couple weeks go. she only emerges from her room if he bribes her with food, she awkwardly tries to dodge his questions, he drives her to school and then begs her to tell him how it went when he picks her up, he spends his college classes distracted because heās freaking out constantly about how to successfully bond with her. His favorite time of day now is night, because she canāt block her mind while sheās asleep, and even if her dreams are all nonsense theyāre still...part of her that he gets to know.
His family keeps begging him to let them meet her, but heās pushing back because if sheās this bad at adjusting to one new family member, how is she going to handle six more?
(meanwhile Alice and Rose started a group chat with her and are having a ball clowning Edward lmao)
wait ksjflksd I think this vine perfectly sums up the dynamic im envisioningĀ Ā https://youtu.be/wQZIUHNORHg
anyway they....very slowly make some progress. much too slowly for Edwardās taste, but hey.
Like he finds out snacks she likes. or jewelry she likes. stuff like that and just...wordlessly leaves it around for her lmao. he thinks itās like trying not to startle a deer, Nessie thinks itās more like a cat trying to gift you a dead mouse, but either way itās weirdly endearing.
He notices she always has a huffy little frown when he picks her up on Wednesdays. So instead of begging her for an ounce of information of her school life, he asks her one Wednesday morning if sheās excited for the day and she admits she has an elective class every Wednesday with a girl she doesnāt get along with.
He gets her school photos (and Weeps) and realizes apart from her room the home is fairly barren of decorations, so he buys a bunch of picture frames and hangs up the school shots, and some pictures of the Cullenās over the years, and the few he has of Bella that he could never bear to part with. Other than catching her smiling at the prom picture of her parents, Nessie doesnāt say anything- but the next time he comes home from hunting, thereās a pile of pictures of her growing up on the table, and he starts weeping all over again as he hangs them up
(thereās one of her and Bella hugging and looking at the camera with identical grins and joy in their eyes, he canāt help but put that in his room. He hopes one day heāll get to see a scene like that in person)
He starts trying to get her out of her room a little more- he still hasnāt managed to a get aĀ āfavoritesā list out of her, so he starts playing movies Bella loved, to see if any of them lure her out. some do, some donāt- he got halfway through a Lord of the Rings marathon, which was Torture in his opinion, but then Ness came out and quietly asked if he could restart it and suddenly they became his favorite movies ever.
Bellaās not able to contact her on a set schedule or anything because of her situation (and you can bet your ass Edwardās contacted every vampire he knows and ordered them to help her out if they come across her or the Volturi), and Edward realizes thatās probably taking a toll on the girl, so he starts telling her stories of her mother when he knew her in Forks. Sheās particularly amused by the blood typing incident- the first time Edward hears Nessie properly laugh, he literally starts crying on the spot
could you imagine the sheer panic if she ever gets so much as a cold
And yes, sheās still pissed on Bellaās behalf, and yes, she specifically blasts 70s music because Bella told her he hates it one time, and yes, if he looks at her like heās a kicked puppy one more time she might claw his eyes out, and yes, she refuses to introduce him to her friends from school because she Knows everyone will then start asking her about herĀ āhot brotherā and she canāt live with that and also canāt live with him knowing that so she told him if he ever introduces himself to any of her friends sheāll set him on fire, and yes, sheās homesick 95% of the time but...heās growing on her. like a mold, or something.
(okay, maybe when Seth tried to analyze why Mamma Mia is her favorite musical, he might have had a point. half a point. quarter of a point. shut up.)
And Edwardās still trying to not have a panic attack every time sheās out of his sight- heās got Carlisle keeping tabs on the Volturi for him, and itās not exactly hard for him to keep track of her through other peopleās minds- but sheās so tiny and her heartbeat is Too Fast and what if she inherited her motherās unlucky streak??
but theyāre toeing the line of co-existing peacefully and Edwardās scared to push it past that
then he has to, because it turns out he sent her to one of Those Schools where the parents have to be involved in the school in some way or another and Nessieās Annoyed
sdkjfsdkjf she keeps trying to get him to just sign up for like pta meetings or something and heās likeĀ āI need you to understand you are the only person in this town I actually know or like I Cannot survive around fundraiser moms I canātāĀ
so sheās like ugh fine Iām in the drama club
listen.....Stage Parent Edward Cullen.......the power this holds...
thatās right this whole post was an elaborate ruse for me to make a musical theater headcanon again lmao
no okay but seriously he starts off just helping build sets and stuff like that but then midway through the year their music teacher gets fired and the schools like begging him to take over because they canāt find someone in enough time thatāll know the music for the show theyāre doing and heās likeĀ āI need you to understand Nessie will never talk to me again if I start actually working at her schoolā and theyāre likeĀ āShe also will never talk to you again if we have to cancel the big musical, thoughā and heās like. fuck.
silent treatment for a week and a half
lmao so now heās trying to juggle being an overly-enthusiastic stage parent whoās making costumes and sets and kinda crying backstage when he sees his daughter in her costume with also being the music director for the damn show and trying to teach a bunch of kids how to read sheet musicĀ
one day he ended up in a coffee shop with the hair and makeup moms, gossiping about the castās love lives, and he literally doesnāt know how he got there
is it wrong to pass Nessie in class even though sheās putting all the wrong answers on the test but he Knows she knows the right answers and is only answering wrong to try and get a rise out of him
Bella sneaks into town to see the show- they thought it would push their luck if the pack came, but they sent an ungodly amount of flowers and candy. When she snuck into the house while Ness was sleeping she Was Not expecting to find Edward up to his elbows in sequins, trying to fix a bedazzler he accidentally broke in frustration, muttering under his breath about how if Nessieās romantic opposite in the show doesnāt keep his thoughts clean heās gonna kill him- and it just cracks her up. She WAS nervous about seeing Edward again but now sheās assured heās still a dork lol
So Edward freaks when he sees her but they donāt wanna wake Ness up so theyāre trying to be quiet but like. theyāre going through itĀ
Like Bella Wants to be pissed at him but she canāt, she still loves him- and while she canāt just get over what he did to her, itās also not lost on her thatĀ āleaving to protect someone I loveā is literally what she had to do to her daughter
And Edward....Edward, who only left to give Bella a chance at a safe, human life, seeing Bella in front of him as a vampire, knowing itās his fault she ended up that way and she had to go through it alone, had to raise a baby herself because heād made it so hard to find him...knowing if heād just pulled his head out of his ass he would have been able to be there for her...would be able to form a coherent sentence around his love right now, would have long and fond memories of Nessieās childhood, likely wouldnāt have to watch Bella hide from the Volturi...heās back in a self-loathing spiral already
But they havenāt seen each other in so long and they just donāt want to...deal with the unpleasantness right now, so they just push it aside. Bella helps Edward with the costumes. Edward fills her in on what sheās been missing with Nessie. Bella tells him some stuff about when Ness was younger. They just spend the night talking, and it feels like no time has past between them at all- which just makes the heartaches a little stronger
When Nessie wakes up to her mother there sheās ecstatic- bubbly and loud and glued to Bellaās hip all day, giving her in depth play-by-plays of her school and rehearsals and friends sheās made, bouncing on her toes all morning, hyper, giggly, and- it kind of breaks Edwardās heart a little, even though he knows he hasnāt really...earned this side of his daughter, yet.Ā
(at least he got his wish of seeing their twin smiles in person)
(he wishes he could see them every second of every day)
so the girls spend the day catching up while Edward mostly feels like a thirdwheel, and then they have to get Ness over to the school so she can get ready
Bella decides to hang out around the school theater before the show actually starts- she leans against the wall next to the piano, the two talking in hushed tones while Edward runs through songs. Bella really missed watching him play- the only thing that managed to drag her away from it was when Nessie called her to the dressing room to help with a hair emergencyĀ
she didnāt talk to him much at intermission, her attention being stolen by the rest of the Cullen family (who had been Very Loudly supporting the show so far, she knew Ness was probably dying of embarrassment backstage)
after the show, the three went back to Edwardās and just...talked. Nessie was gushing about the show and eating while her parents assured her she was the greatest actress ever born, simple stuff like that. she fell asleep sandwiched in between them on the couchĀ
Bella realizes sheās never going to be able to bring herself to leave again if Nessie wakes up, and tells Edward as much. He clearly doesnāt want her to go just yet either, but...sheās on the run, itās not like she has much choiceĀ
He has so much he wants to say to her but he just- canāt. itās not the right time. but heās hoping she can see that in his eyes
Bella shifts Nessie off her shoulder so Edward can hold her, and she gives him a light kiss and saysĀ āthank you, Edwardā before disappearing in a flash. she needed to go before she lost her nerve.
Edward canāt bring himself to let Nessie out of his arms, so instead of carrying her to bed he just stays there, holding her, trying his best not to think that that could be the last time for a long time heād ever see his Bella again, trying not to let thoughts of a life he gave up unwittingly consume him
okay I didnāt mean for this to be So Long so Iām cutting it here uhh...let me know if anyone wants a part 2? sorry lmao